Marco! (Beta) RoutineHub Documentation

Assets

http://bit.ly/dbmarco

The definitive lost-in-the-couch solution.

(Note: This Shortcut is currently in BETA and requires iOS 14.5 Beta 8 in order to replicate the function demonstrated above.)

THIS VERSION INCLUDES PROFANITY If you’re a potential tester who would prefer a clean version, please do contact me via the methods below. I appreciate your interest and want to accommodate you any way I can.

The idea for this Shortcut dates back to iOS 12 Beta - when I first encountered Siri Shortcuts. For whatever reason, it didn’t take long for me to want a sort of call-and-return Shortcut for those (far too numerous) cases when I’d left my iPhone somewhere obscured in the room.

Marco! as it stands is a 48-action Siri Shortcut designed to be triggered by Hey Siri! in the event of a lost phone.

In this full, original version, you’ll hear my actual voice at the beginning, followed by a short song sample, and then a variety of shenanigans narrated by the new Siri Voice 2.

Here are the steps in full:

  1. Turn Low Power Mode OFF
  2. Turn Airplane Mode OFF
  3. Turn Wi-Fi On
  4. Turn Bluetooth On
  5. Set brightness to 100%
  6. Turn Do Not Disturb OFF
  7. Turn appearance Light
  8. Set playback destination to iPhone
  9. Set volume to 89%
  10. Vibrate device (Not currently working.)
  11. Play my voice saying “Polo!” + a few other items
  12. Toggle (flash) the flashlight 17 times (odd number leaving your flashlight on constantly unless it was on before the Shortcut was triggered)
  13. Play a clip of Nasenbluten’s “Blinded”
  14. Siri Voice 2 Monologue #1 including GPS Lat/Long and Altitude (yes, I realize this isn’t particularly useful.)
  15. Default notification sound plays 3 times
  16. Siri Voice 2 Monologue #2 is a theatrical reading of the infamous Navy SEAL Copypasta.
  17. Plays a farewell in my voice
  18. Shows a goodbye notification
  19. Plays the entirety of Sarah MacLachlan’s “Angel”

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