Thanks for letting me in folks! I daresay this is about the most appealing Facebook Group I've ever seen.
A few weeks ago, I shared this video on Twitter and the TextExpander account replied "Brilliant!," so I figured it'd be worth sharing here.
Basically, I copied an AppleScript from one of Brett Terpstra's snippets and inserted my own URL.
The end result: if I slip up and type out any of the no-no clichés/platitudes listed in my personal styleguide on macOS, I am interrupted and the link to said styleguide is opened in Safari.
Here's the full AppleScript, unmodified:
tell application "Safari"
activate
open location "https://davidblue.wtf/styleguide"
end tell