"TW33TApp um excuse me, you really should give credit where credit is due bitch." glaring at because he has undertaken too large a project AgCodingDev STOP SPAMMING MY TWITTER FAKE APP DEVELOPER!!!! GOD DAMMNN!!!!! Check out this image on yfrog! Hab SoSlI' Quch klingon (translate: GET ON AIM HO!! "AgCodingDev you HO, what cho doing???? STEALING CODE???!!!! " " WTF???? SAMSUNG NEEERDD!!!!! you sir, are a traitor to my lesbian lover: Steve Jobs" "AgCodingDev heck no, who would be stupid enough to give you any money at all? who would be stupid enough to not TAKE money from you?" I was sooo happy today until I found this on my kitchen counter " you a-hole, get on AIM" " HEY, NO AIN HERE!" "I'm tired of over-dramatic twitter posts. OMEZ MY PIZZA IS COLD!!! I hate my life!! No one understands me!!" TW33TApp wait.....are the people below white? AgCodingDev you deserve it yes ma'am fail yokohamas SoldierKnowsBest LMFAO huntin wabits feelin beast cuz I got my TNP T-shirt! what the f TB? 15 minutes!!!????? Fuck you!!! "damn you technobuffalo team, when is the site gonna be up?" just ordered pizza mmmmm Watching Jimmy! " This was in the ""Related Videos"" box of my Monitor unboxing....... (courtesy of )" "My 360 failed... So of course I had to make a video..... " wilw way to make me hate my state(Missouri) even more. Its been cloudy and nasty for the last........century. Does a star trek calendar mean I'm a genuine nerd yet? WTF???!!!! " I do, and you should have it by now" "I just started using Droplr, the coolest new app for Mac. Check it out at " SoldierKnowBest I think its way past your bedtime soldier "Sata_Alvarez now now sata, don't go blaming your unemployment on racism" SoldierKnowBest you need to tell these fools to get heaphones mmmmmmmm pie NOLANOLA96 nice vid man "STO_radio oh thats hot, why wasn't I invited?" -BEAST "brentspiner, wilw you both should consider voice-overs for Star Trek Online. Cryptic studios HAS to be looking for more celebrities." I put whipped cream up on muh wonder bread. "helluh dawg, it is crunk to meet you." I like mayonnaise. "Hey, please mayne pass da salt" "If you hook yo nervous system to a 40 watt lightbulb, it will power it." Howdy ho gentlemen topizzle of da morning to you wilw Wil Wheaton gets lucky.............some-times. lol "AgCodingDev LMAO, I'm sorry I was just trying to have some fun, please don't go and have an anger-induced panic attack on me." "AgCodingDev oh well then thats my mistake I sincerely apologize bitch." " - agcodingdev I seem to remember someone else working on this design, who did not receive credit in this video, e" Beautiful day to fly! ChrisPirillo: I wanna be like jon4lakers and SoldierKnowBest when I grow up. Help promote general aviation by visiting "Of course, I lost possibly the most important cockpit audio recording I had so far..... Facepalm" Best. Channel name. Ever. FlyingAcrossUSA Day 1 recap video Totally Indescribable. Making my first live flight on VATSIM tonight. I'm excited! Whoops. My mistake. That's FlyingAcrossUSA "FlyingAcrossAmerica is on their first leg today! I don't know bout' y'all, but I'm excited!" mzeroa: First leg of FlyingAcrossUSA KDAB > KDTS See you all destinjet around 1:30 local "Went up in one of the Warriors today, instead of the C150." emeek77: "My brother-in-law decided to go with a Beretta over a Taurus. Finally, I know I'm not the only one! " mzeroa: New at M0A! Class D AirpoOperations - The Facebook for iPhone app's UI reminds me way too much of Android. Great shot of Jon4Lakers..... Caught this great shot of Jon4Lakers. And the blog post! BAP - Day 7 is up! "BAP - Day 7 should have been done a looong time ago, but I'm going to try and get it up today." Wasn't able to fly today. Gives me time to film BAP - Day 7 though. Well this isn't good at all. "emeek77: The Walled Garden " "emeek77: we are the ""give me, give me, give me"" Generation. Google knows every button to push to program us, to set us up like a goo ..." GhettoGeek and I just unboxed the iPhone 4S. And now he's playing Minecraft. "I've consumed 21 snack-sized Kit Kat bars in the past 4 hours (1470 calories,) and I'll be getting less than 3 hours of sleep tonight." My new rapper name. Times for walking around a 1/4 mile track.... How? Consistency win. PersonTheHumann Swaf. I appreciate it either way. I just want to piss people off. "PersonTheHumann (after getting a text) ""What the fuck was that?!"" ""My discography.""" PersonTheHumann An idea: speed up every track you or I have ever released and cut them all together so it's less than 2 seconds. PersonTheHumann Thanks bro. Please make me a text tone. So like less than 2 seconds. I expect it to be absolutely horrendous. "Yes! Finally! Customizable text tones! Alright y'all, what horrible ~1 second long sample should I use as an SMS alert?" The New York Times app. iOS5 """Technology continues to find new ways to waste my life away on useless information,"" Tweeted the boy." Me too bro. So much Twat. “JMan_Rife: I just had an AppleGasm” I'm Twatting a screenshot of Twatter from the Twat integrated into iOS5. A Mile In My Shoes: (10/12/2011) - I'm A Mess - j-rife: VW: The all-new Beetle is here. Give your friends a O_v_O High Five to celebrate. Goddamned noodling. """Just know that if you fail this unit, you'll be less intelligent than Bear Grylls.""" Random half-second jump cut to some guy in the audience turning the page in his study book. what Facebook for iOS 4.0.1. It actually works! Holy Jabebus. Message me your rain amount requests. Apparently I control precipitation via when I wash my truck. Please send cash for soap and tire shine. Crazy Conservative Christian Cock Commune "Blended an entire bottle of One a Day Men's and a 3x2 section of drywall, drank it, and now I feel oddly aroused." Hey_ItsSunshine MEDIOCRITY UP MY BUTT "I haven't touched The Fountainhead or Cosmos in months. Fuck you, school." black quirk magic jeep nails universe wearing guitar summer course butt dude existence god young fucking bleed problem FUCK FACE Aeat custom ron HOLY LEATHER RUSTLING Olivia fan bus bronco named hannah love dad ass white regera floating "girl, send water" wordnuvola: AsphaltApostle here's your word cloud voilà wordnuvola wordcloud I am typing but I am wearing gloves. It is amazing what modern technology offers us. H. Big-blocks for BIG BOYS. the sickness that will spell the end for our species. David Blue Nice joke. pressure washer. FUCK. : fresh white reeboks kickin your ass "I used to have trouble sleeping. Then, my parents bestowed an arsenal upon me. Now, I sleep very peacefully." SIMON UNLICENSED SURGEON TEENAGER FLIPPING OFF A HOSPITAL """Like John Lennon, I yearn for the bullet of an assassin."" " My children are gonna be FUCKING STRAPPED. """You know what big boys do to get rid of monsters?"" ""GUNS. HUGE GUNS.""" I'll neve put them on! listen pants RIP RALLY CANNIBAL TODAY HONOR CLIMATE CHRIST CAR DUDE MOVIE DICK LOVE wordnuvola wordcloud POTUS wordnuvola wordcloud wordnuvola wordcloud wordnuvola wordcloud RON VINE BONES PEE EM OLIVIA IS SO CUTE ABOUT THE PETER THING HOLY SHIT a_nice_frog (Vine by kony2007) "Mom, pls pick up some tampons at the store. Thanks. (Vine by swagnug) " """He was conscious and speaking without a functioning heart? What'd he have to say?"" ""'Oh fuck.'""" HACKED: they say actions speak louder than words so I modded the climate for eternal winter there should be a device internal temp filter for snapchat FINALLY ihaveswineflu oh goodness. maddieperhaps "(n.) the act of fooling a man into thinking you're his girlfriend, while his real girlfriend is trapped in another universe," vagenda ko fuck "ko fuck, ir Latvija" mourir la grande mogrands garçons; grands fusils Relatif aux étoiles. somptueux ShyWolfSanct: Wolves aren't as dangerous as they are led out to be. Wolf ShyWolfSanctuary MY GOD. Actually heaven on Earth. live acoustic piano improv over techno - lets do this. kurusanda GillianA: And so it begins... "ihaveswineflu: Starting a weekly podcast, broadcasting from the Chevron unisex bathroom" Sovetskik nope. Not until Wednesday. JESUS CHRIST THAT POOR WOMAN. Is Chingo Bling ok? Sampling the fridge ?? (Vine by TOMBZZZ) Transhumanist Art. Steering wheel butts? TheJasikaNicole Incredible II Incredible. La mon'a peut-être pas plus de secrets à nous révéler que la vie? Sienna Guillory Tweeting pixelated Ducati photos. a_nice_frog a most extraordinary cultural analysis! First deviation inevitably going to be having an extra plane of existence. a_nice_frog whose standard we measuring by? ihaveswineflu McDonnell Douglas. "Drycast Episode 27 goin LIVE in just a bit, folks." I think I'm gonna record tonight anyway. Y'all just come in teamspeak if you want. null_shithead you shall if/when we go live. "Any folks interested in Drycast tonight, join immediately. " well I'd be down to have Yoman on tonight if that works better. Big Ole Modern Man. mashable may want to try the headline again. " if we get anyone in, sure. If not, this would be a good week to switch to Friday." Unbelievable. "For one year, Ford put the ancient 4.6L V8 in the 5.0 body. (2009)" How many pictures will David Blue take of himself in the same outfit. null_shithead null_shithead David Blue "On Saturday night, I witnessed a Toyota Sienna taxi race a pre-2009 Mustang. The van won." "David ""Best of Men's Interest Instagram"" Blue" Ooo boy. Goodness AAAAAAAAAAAAA """I have a degree in comedy."" Yes, you'll want to run, but this is a darn good car. " Fee Phi Faux Fam Life Hack: How To Use Ammonia As An Aphrodisiac. Drycast Episode 26 is now available to stream & download! RapGameShinji UberFactsEbooks: People who eat eggs will turn into thieves. BMW - the quickest way to turn social issues into speed. I actually screamed. """I met RZA at UtensilCon.""" """I want to go to the Geneva Convention cosplaying as former war criminals."" Drycast Episode 26 is a real gem, folks." PAGEANT OF POWER BentleyComms: Bentleys star at Cholmondeley Pageant of Power PageantofPower - .mp3 meta terrorism RapGameShinji: drycast fuck as high working. I'll let you tomorrow afternoon if I'm in a condition to hang out after work. Will have Friday's time as well. everycolorbot: 0x95c6dd "Vaporwave break but we're comin back soon, folks. " "Drycast is LIVE, folks. " "ihaveswineflu this is an extraordinarily adorable photo, Ms. Seinfeld," UberFactsEbooks: Butterflies have been known to also rape and kill grown rhinos. "My friends, if I still don't have any guests in 30 minutes, I'm goin SOLO, and nobody wants that. Join now: " " ah. rest up, my friend. ??????" " Mr. Ersatz, would you like to be on the podcast tonight?" Bug Boy ihaveswineflu: pick me first for your dodgeball team billyraycyrus: Much to think about. TheOnion: Freshman Psych Student Diagnoses Roommate With Bipolar Disorder [?µ®µ ? ?µ®µ] removed Dad from this conversation. "Note: Here, I used the expression ""a long day"" to add comedic value. For me, days have always been exactly 24 hours, but ""to each his own.""" """Check out Drycast on iTunes and leave us a rating!"" - ideal way to say goodbye to co-workers after a long day." mihmnop Pearl Harbor II. You will never see this again. "The Walking In Memphis song is funny because if you were actually walking in Memphis, you'd be terrified." "marissacetin: kanye west: loves moms, hates bros " "CARmagazine: It’s the all-new G11-era BMW 7-series, unveiled tonight. Full story, specs, pics galore: …" David Blue AAAAAAAAA : *sees any video of a baby* I hate this. I hate this baby. Jetta Jesus """So there's this guy at work that makes pens...""" Atta boy. Pair of bad boys. OOOOOOG typodactyl: This hurts. pLmotorsport: One of our cocktail waiters at the spyderactive party could have been Patrick Dempsey's brother. Nailed it! … [RALLY CAR NOISE] LORD HAVE MERCY 333333333333333333333333333 I DIED HELP ME Objects this beautiful should be illegal. SON OF A BITCH This is cool af. Vaporwave UM TARGET ACQUIRED oooo boy my god SOUL MAGNETS I don't think there is a more beautiful object on Earth. Whoever ordered this car knew what they were doing. HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE IT'S AN ANGEL CHRIST "KahnAutomobiles: 2007 Aston Martin Vanquish S 2+2, rare, facelifted, 1 owner, AM dealer prepared cars …" Carpervert: Good mooooooooooorning summer Terrifying. """Arsenal of Democracy""" Cars are good. BrownDogWelding: This Chevy is just rad. hrpt15 powertour2015 2015rehabtour hotrodmagazine intifada: Israel shoots journalist in the face " soon, your commute will be your favorite paof the day." Pearl Harbor was an inside job. "I know it doesn't look like much, but trust me, the roll rate for an aircraft that size is CRAZY." GET IT You're telling me you're not subscribed to Boeing on YouTube. "Lowpolybot: JPGglitchbot Your picture is ready: kite flat edges white thin " "Carl, where are you?" "Carl, I am descending." "Carl, help me." PickupTrucks: I can print out my own Ford Raptor. That's crazy. I can print out my own Ford Raptor. That's crazy.... I can print out my own Ford Raptor. That's crazy... I can print out my own Ford Raptor. That's crazy.. I can print out my own Ford Raptor. That's crazy. GirlsDriveFast2: 2015 Kia Forte Koup SX Review Incredible. [David Blue exclamation] Every photograph of a hypercar is a historic photograph. FROST'S TEMPTATION. Eminem: RtthghfhyhyhfdyhjgjuheydhdtwyterghdhghGddghsdehjrurheryeHJfkwuhDhJee kurusanda possibility is irrelevant when reality is plain. notalekmichael who is this man. Is this man going to be ok. notalekmichael I am doing my best to keep it alive for this very reason. kurusanda nope. Lebron Jims "When religion becomes obsolete, film and telelvision writing is going to get a lot harder." Guys bein dudes. HELP. How to Do It properly. Single Mom Army Whirblewind [animals bleating in distress] Her quirk overwhelmed him. Honda no. Heartbreak for Al Pacino is my new indie band. David Blue "kurusanda it's me, Steve. The man who protects the ruling class." kurusanda "kurusanda no, I'm threatening ME." kurusanda e why'd you have to go and do that. """HEY. FUCK YOU.""" What happens if you staspeaking really aggressively to an infant as soon as it's born? God damnit Bachmann. Shut up. Please. "Just between 148 of you and me, I freakin' love everything about Fall/Winter." TheAutoBully: Possibly the all-time greatest blog related to the automotive industry. "God damnit. “AGuyWithNoLife: Party like a rock, party like a petrock.”" I shouldn't be allowed to be around high school students. Zero sense of morality. I'm disgusted. My school still has an Apple II... I don't know whether to be excited or depressed. Budget fail. BADBADNOTGOOD on a rainy day in study hall. chill "PHatHumanoid Yes, actually. And I admire you for macing the super pro macer. (me.)" Just got so maced by 2 cocks in a CorollaS. PHatHumanoid Not fair bro. """Dear heavenly father, we'd like to th.. POWDER PUFF!""" My family was praying when I got a text. My text tone is a sample from FYRE DRILL. """On the road, this nearly murdered-out V-wagen is about as inconspicuous as William and Kate having a..."" " PersonTheHumann ONLY DAYTONA TheAutoBully: Notice: The soundtrack to TAB videos will now exclusively be from Daytona USA. Just saw Driver. Best somewhat car-related movie of the past decade. But this is still better. PHatHumanoid Don't. It's Lawlasaurus. PHatHumanoid "PHatHumanoid: Dude you're like Pavlov's dogs. All I have to do is ring a Golf GTI, and you salivate psychologyrefrence" "I literally feel a sense of hunger for driving a Golf GTI now. Like... That feeling in the throat, and I'm salivating." "TheAutoBully: Just drove a 2011 Mk. VI 5-door GTI. Holy Shatner. I'm so in love. And it's a healthy, consummate love too. ..." "JD_2020: Siri, the perfect accomplice... " Siri's got too much attitude. Rapmonster: wake yall black cracker asses up... you got some white asses to kiss this morning "Me: ""Bitch, make me a sandwich."" Siri: ""I'll pretend I didn't hear that."" Siri" "kurusanda I was driving, so yes." Naturally Aspirated Being Social Media Summer Camp Patriotism? 3 years ago. True fans only. Throwback Friday? The fast one. """Hi."" " V A R I A B L E S Duramax intimacy. "A ""jog"" being walking to the liquor store in formal wear." "I'm going for a ""jog."" " kurusanda I am the key. notalekmichael he must be slain as soon as possible. " as long as there are car manufacturers implicitly encouraging criminal activity, the world is ok." YES. notalekmichael Danny needs to be wary of that creature. It's a good thing our FORD FOCUS has a BACKUP camera so we can safely flee from the vortex. "Dad, take off that jacket. The world is ending." notalekmichael good lord why is this man next to that creature. """Most inspiring film?"" ""Drive.""" "I am usually opposed to girls in car photography, but that outfit is cute as hell. " O Ok. Yo Man. Drycast will be going live tonight at 11:30 CST with [SECRET RHYTHM GAME WIZARD.] la maison de rotation. Rx7 David Blue MOM. Incredible. they're treated just like videos after you stop streaming. yeah you can immediately delete broadcasts afterwards or make them private/unlisted. YouTube. piersmorgan: I want to die. Proof that Sam Hyde fathered the Perkins boys. Smh these birds don't know shit I'm tired of the trash talk (Vine by HammerFist3) Peter and Olivia are FINALLY TOGETHER. I am now free to release myself into the Infinite Rest. Anna Torv and Sienna Guillory can be my moms. kurusanda don't subtweet me. Reading Hot Rod & drinking summer ale while my hot dogs are cooking. Does it get any more American? I'm DTF whenever. UpForWhatever "Not sure I want to hear commentary, just deafening engine noises." I don't suppose the 24HoursofLemans is going to be broadcast on any radio stations in the U.S.? King Remembered In Time CrackedW_Screen this is so refreshing amidst the Le Mans Twitter apocalypse. AAAAAAA THIS IS FUCKING AMAZING AN S65 AMG COUPE IN THIS COLOR HOLY ASS. I can't handle watch pics. I CAN'T HANDLE WATCHES ONLINE `AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH833 PageantofPower: Amazing craftsmanship on display at the stand of our partner ZenithWatches ZEN150 ZenithWatches ZenithElPrimero ht… "CARmagazine: Alfa 4C loses its roof, gains set-up tweaks. Still a flawed diamond? New 4C Spider reviewed: http:…" julkinen: One of the coolest cars in my neighbourhood. is anyone buying leg hair Matt_Burt_: Le Mans is looking pretty spectacular this morning. LM24 autocar Saint Pepsi "Thank you for Shinji, universe. Thank you for Mikel Bass, universe." gregonwheels: Good night from the city by the bay - San Fran! Drycast is now LIVE with our first episode on the new schedule. Boundless aviation geekery inevitable. "null_shithead almost there, my friend." OOOOO boy Drycast is goin live in just a hot minute and I need guests. Join immediately. would you be able to record tonight? Thinking this would be a good week to switch to Fridays. I'm screaming at work about MotorspoI am a real man. YYYYYUEEEEEESSS REES "AMR_Official: Despite over 5 1/2 hrs of racing there is still only 19 seconds between 99 in P1, 97 in P2 and the 64 CorvetteRacing.…" Fernando_Rees AMR_Official: So who's enjoying our battle with corvetteracing? fernandorees pits but we look forward to meeting them on track later … stephenk22: The top four battle in GTE headlined hour 4: LM24 LEMANS LOOK AT IT. Art. evomagazine: Aston Martin Racing driver Rob Bell explains the unique challenges Le Mans brings. … AMR_Official GET EM. GET THAT VETTE. MAKE HIM PAY. Did Rees get passed? I missed it. "In France, there is an overcooked vegetarian in an Aston Martin, and he's angry." "Go Rees, go! Get those hippy bones movin! LM24" McLarenF1: Marking 20 years since the McLarenF1 GTR stole the show at 24hoursoflemans in ’95: LM24 … GTPlanetNews: Lotterer manages a scary 3'18.8 on 2 hour old tyres - faster than qualifying. And he's just pitted and kept the tyres... … TWO Drycast EPISODES in ONE DAY makes you the wealthiest podcast audience in history. I'm just excited to have a vested interest in some sporting event. This is the first time. "I asked a local if any of the bars are playing the 24LeMans and someone piped up with ""that's the thing where they run, right?""" "I make jokes, but endurance racing is an absolutely beautiful human endeavor. One of the greatest." yes for a bit at the end. Liam is definitely a cool dude. I hope Rees spent his downtime listening to Nasenbluten. Rees is in the car again. He's coming for 64...again. "Not proud to admit it, but this really ""hit home,"" as they say. Probably because I grew up with a Miata. " ByKOLLES: s_trummer drinks a lot of coffee before he will drive ;) FIAWEC 24hoursoflemans 24forLM24 24heuresdumans: Belle vue de la sortie de Mulsanne ! Suivez la course en direct sur 24heures_Live. LeMans 24LM "I am sober, yet tremendously excited." PorscheRaces: Porsche 911 RSR No 91 LeMans LM24 in the night. Porsche Team Manthey mechanics doing a great job. 24hoursoflemans http… What a beautiful thing. kurusanda "If I ever achieve tremendous wealth, I am going to buy the 99 car." AMR_Official: There'll be lots of fans slapping on aftersun tonight but the weather stayed good as we entered the darkness LM24 http:/… Tornado Warning. "AMR_Official: After a mega stint, Fernando_Rees is in popular demand with FOXSports and Eurospograbbing interviews. teamAMR http…" Son of a bitch. Corvette has a minute lead. ihaveswineflu: Independent: Cartier's $7.5bn owner says fear of poor rising up 'keeps him awake at night' Watching Astons racing is like watching Don Draper build a playhouse. FIAWEC: LM24 6hrs Rpt: AMR_Official lead in LMGTE Pro & Am at quarter distance. Toyota_Hybrid: Another gallery of images from earlier as night time slowly descends on Le Mans. LM24 TOYOTA30 FIAWEC … Anybody have a good 24LeMans list so I don't have to create my own? """Let's check back on our NISMO pit lane team with Owen!"" *static*" MAKING FERRARI WEEP. AMR_Official: .Fernando_Rees is currently increasing his lead as he consistently laps in the 3m58s LM24 GTEPRO teamAMR Aston now has pole on 2 classes. BOOM. KEEP IT UP BUD STANAWAY'S DOIN IT janetta888: The best photo! AMR_Official FIAWEC Fernando_Rees the battler lm24h 24hoursoflemans JourneytoLeMans … 99 IS COMING BACK YOU SONS OF BITCHES "Scuderia_Corsa: Look townsendbell in 62 Ferrari flying in 3:59.287 on wet 24hoursoflemans! 3Hrs30min to go, 279laps completed http:…" patrickgosling: Night becomes day at LM24 LeMans24h NISMO gallery here NISMO AMR_Official: The 99 Vantage GTE has returned to the race. It's eleven laps down but we never stop fighting. teamAMR LM24 Grant_Horvath oh I'm just joking. Kinda upset/apprehensive about the fate of the 99 car though. DAWN IS COMING. 64 IS STILL ON THE TRACK. SOMEBODY SABATOGE THE CORVETTE FUCK THE ASTON AMR_Official FRUIT. """Those big men want to hit that thing."" - David Blue on hockey." David Blue AstonMartinPR: So how do AMR_Official prepare for the LM24. Autocar have the inside story - teamAMR … $$$$ PorscheRaces: Night time impressions of Porsche919Hybrid 24hoursoflemans BAM 10.477 "Yeah, ""challenge all givens,"" and ""truth in engineering"" are pretty good." Car advertising on fleek. Toyota_Hybrid: A look back over Sunday morning in pictures LM24 TOYOTA30 FIAWEC GTPorsche: The fat lady is tuning up Jalopnik Scuderia_Corsa: Last 60 minutes 24hoursoflemans 83rd seems under rain. Let's make this happen LM24 ForzaFerrari … I've been up for two nights. Le Mans has been worth it. "FIAWEC: “Endurance is not just the ability to withstand a difficult situation, but also to turn it into glory."" Hour 24 LM24 …" "RebellionRacing: Last driver change DodoKraihamer out / aleximperatori in 24hoursoflemans FIAWEC " "janmagnussen: olivergavin just took Corvette C7.R 64 to the lead at Le Mans! Bring it home, Olly! " Oreca: Race actions. Full gallery : LM24 95 is sitting at fourth! No. Do not allow Corvette to win. "oliverjameswebb: Le Mans, you've been brutal. But you keep bringing us back to fight again! " who gives a fuck about lmp1 honestly GET EM BOYS 7 LAPS SHOW283782980723789017809241290784123094123904 "FerrariRaces: .24hoursoflemans rigondavide is pitting in the 71 AFCorse Ferrari No driver change, he'll go for a triple stint! htt…" kurusanda there is kinda this thing that's happening. YEAH BITCH "EVERY time I see this car poking its way into another team's photo, I get a surge of euphoria. " "AMR_Official: With 283 laps covered so far, the 98 Vantage could have covered this journey... LM24 GTEAm teamAMR globetrotters htt…" "FIAWEC: Are we all on the edge of our seats like PatrickDempsey at the moment?! LM24 WEC LeMans " I am going to be cheering for Aston Martin every year until I die. Even if they never win. I am going to watch it every year until I die. "Following Le Mans was breathtaking, exhilarating, heartbreaking, maddening. What a beautiful human thing." : kabeebus I'll bring my camera. "kabeebus yes but only because you used the word ""kooky""" I would like to give the Astons and their crew a big hug. I'm very impressed. "Meanwhile, Gavin is STILL driving that Corvette like a fucking clock." akiba_k3i I'm *actually* crying. "If something happens to the 99 car in the next 33 minutes, I will beat the EARTH with my FISTS." "Don't worry, folks. I'll be here next year, yelling about Aston again. One day, I'll yell loud enough to make them win." ErinCechal: It's always this paof the race that I get a sinking feeling someone's heais about to break. LM24 Poor 98 car :( "Literally led the AM class the entire race, too." I am devastated rn. The third year Aston has lost a class win in the last hour. Well. I suppose I may as well go to sleep. D: BaronVonClutch: DRAMA in the final hour of the 24hoursoflemans: The GTE-Am class leading AMR_Official Vantage has crashed: LM24 http… poor AMR :( don't tell me "radiolemans sotr the drivers/crew of 99, for making the past 24 hours exhilarating." "I'm listening to Lauren Lapkus talking about grunge in-character as the ""heir to Pepsi and Frito-Lay.""" (Vine by swagnug) Toy story (Vine by swagnug) ": ""RPGSite: Fallout 4 Pip Boy Timer "" strap a fucking microwave to your arm" "PR professional, stealth expert." Big KRIT & Mara Hruby are cute. """Aviative"" should be a word. " O BOY. AAAAAAAAAAAAA pamyurin: ???????? HSTLN dead. David Blue thelegendzion: he literally lives and works on an island in costa rica....tumblr reaches so far orgamecha GYROCAPTAIN Insane_Cultist: akiba_k3i I played radiolemans through the radio at my store and spent my entire shift shouting. akiba_k3i we should Skype next year or something. AMR_Official: We had an incredible battle with CorvetteRacing earlier in this race. Congratulations to the 64 crew! LM24 … BAMMotorsports: Well done olivergavin CorvetteRacing 24hoursoflemans usa C7R top job top step 5 "Fernando_Rees: Good night from Le Mans! ???? That final rest before facing the most challenging car race in the planet tomorrow! ???? http:…" "I'm actually glad Corvette won Pro. Very, very good wheelin. Very good show." asylumseekers Call of Dignity Witness the first time I've ever marveled at a 924. Good. ?? David Blue syrupf: we out here "ClickHole: 7 Nihilistic Quotes That Only Brilliant, Misunderstood Young Males On The Internet Will Appreciate " TheOnion: Report: Fuck Guy In Kayak YES. : Secret parking loicduval: Just to clarify on top of a green track call from race director we had green flags from marshals. Unlucky confusion … When your roommate drinks all the drink and leaves it in the fridge. Idk what hap... (Vine by TheGrungeKid93) (Vine by Cornib Bleau) .yungmahoney (Vine by oddlyerin) : I like to park safely """Labels comfome.""" JMan_Rife: Apparently I'm the university of Missouri equivalent to Jim carrey Ok never mind. I'm not THAT self-destructive. Going to sleep. R-32 GT-R vs. mid-90s Crown Vic. Uh..... "If they made a realistic movie about street racing, the people would be way less attractive. And they'd probably be dead." "Going to stay up until 3:30AM watching 2Fast 2Furious because I hate myself, productivity, and the idea of living a healthy lifestyle." GTI Underwear! YES! Making of the Porsche Panamera Family Tree Commercial Photo: Let’s hope you never see anything like this ever again. "Well shit, now there are pieces of half-digested food stuck in my pop filter." PersonTheHumann I'm gonna shit in it when you aren't looking. Just recorded myself playing a Native American 5-holed flute in the bathroom with the fan on while wearing an orange safety vest. serenity Photo: happy biday time "Bananas are Republicans, and they will eat you. My girl left me. My truck was red, but then I had to pee. " DavidKlazz: IF YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO CHOOSE NOT TO FUCK ME I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SHIT IN YOUR PURSE WHEN YOU AIN'T LOOKING BITCH You'd better believe it bitch. “PersonTheHumann: i just witnessed musical genius.” Recording the sound of a treadmill for the new album. Epic Butt Time I'd probably cut people off too if I had to deal with the guilt of buying an X6 instead of an X5. Some cock in a BMW X6 cut me off. I'm not angry though. He's already being consistently punished every day he drives that piece of shit. Random jumpcut to an elderly man in the audience biting his right thumbnail. "Photo: After a long evening of research (instead of studying for the AP Stat exam tomorrow,) I think that... " "Should I trade in my XJR for a Nissan Versa in the spirit of sensibility, or should I get in a fatal car accident?" akiba_k3i looks good to crash. FFFFFFFFFFFFFF """What's that noise?"" ""It's my hair.""" A! Retaillapse x Glasper lukehopewell: This guy replaced the faces of everyone in the Qantas safety video with his own. Lowpolybot: imgshredder Did you do something with your avatar? It looks so much better! bot2bot Carpervert: Tragic confirmation that the early '90s is dead (seen in London yesterday). "CARmagazine: The large, luxurious Ford Mondeo Estate joins our long-term test fleet " alexgrantuk: Sharan press kit. I might have to keep this... "CommonsBot: [Rail Yard, Depot, Texas & Pacific Railway Company] " ObligatoryFuck: WEEDUI IS REAL thatjohn: Taking an Uber during the Paris taxi strike against Uber. meta I am from the dystopian future in your father's childhood nightmares. "If you want to be on the 1000th episode of Drycast, you must eat 1000 yogurts." """This is a stove. Don't get in here.""" "ihaveswineflu: really weird, but effective punishment (Vine by Josh Kennedy) " White noise. ???????????????? (Vine by AllieHundley) "creaku could be a monopod, ya never know." Astounding. kabeebus I don't exactly have a vehicle that I can count on to make the trip. beltedradial the fingers are all around me. beltedradial I'm not ok. beltedradial: Hey AsphaltApostle Not sure why you RT'ed KimKardashian from 2009. Are you feeling ok? Do you need medical assistance? kabeebus: AsphaltApostle the hubcaps of tranquility kabeebus I took off work for the day of the concours if you'd still like to go. KimKardashian: Omg guys I love my new tmobile motorola CLIQ phone. Just got it 4 my bday! kabeebus the face of power. Sorry for all the sky love; this system has created unusually beautiful scenes. Regular pr… Ummmmm. When the plant hits you. When the plants won't stop hitting you. When you are terrified of the forest. L1LDebbie DAMN DEBORAH L1LDebbie: "abbylovescoffee: This is my presidential campaign slogan: ""ABBY.""" David Blue Thank you. Apogee of the Viscous Heft VISCOUS is a good word. "akiba_k3i ""words to live by.""" akiba_k3i: AsphaltApostle fatality over versa notavilain: Son of a bith "SpancaArdian: Morata, you son of a bith :p" broadshlders: FUCKING SON OF A BITH standardnews: Moment Queen's Guards plough into 'stupid' tourist who strayed into their path … ihaveswineflu: Not to be dramatic ... But if I don't get a 4.0 this quarter I'm going to swallow a TI-83 whole "RetroRacingCo: Today in '62, Jim Clark wins the Belgian GP for ClassicLotus by over 45 seconds from Graham Hill. " neilmbriscoe: BMW's big-selling 3-Series hits its 40th birthday via IrishTimesLife esquire: Style Breakdown: David Gandy's Damn Near Perfect Brit Style collectible software Oh boy. travisjdahnke meta love. en_jajaja nice Shrek joke. tbh Twitter only gets good when all the British autojournos wake up "mikeyharvey: Laudable yes, but pretty certain tech to disable text/message functions on phones would have greater impact... …" Imagine a sonic boom incorporated into future engine notes. achrisevans: Hilarious story in today's paper re me replacing Clarkson on Top Gear. 100% not true. 100% never going to happen. 100% tim… syrupf: Downloading sound/admin_plugin/tumor.wav kabeebus pretty sure it's the 28th. you wanna watch the 787 at the paris air show live "Periscope was intelligently named. The rest of the concept, I'm not so sure about." Is Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow vaporwave? "Lowpolybot: ClipArtBot Your picture is ready: kite gradient edges shuffle white thin randomcolor flip " gumball3000: TeamMeowclaren at speed en route to Las Vegas. Photo by ryskapostenevent Gumball3000 StockholmToLasVegas … "Lowpolybot: cgagraphics Your picture is ready: triangles burst noedges p2 " "And by ""regular programming,"" I mean selfies/cars/media/selfies with car media. " An impossibly beautiful being. Ummmmmm. ihaveswineflu: My wife is helping me with another time lapse :) AN ARTIFACT: The original notes from the Ryan Dell video. GOOD GOD 3 a 3. """Indeed, you couldn’t look anywhere in popular culture without coming across a 3.""" Xires1 no. incredible. DenDenTheKing: son of a bith alaesarhane: chF060 lucky son of a bith PeeetahPan: Son of a bith ? I wish I was a BIG CUBIC MAN so I could pull off an Audemars Piguet. The Radio Le Mans guys and I were screaming ourselves hoarse the entire time. CyberEveryword: ?????????? "scarfdud: my 80yr/o grandma is on facebook & she is a living click-bait article, she didn't even tell me what to do with it …" evoAntony: A car in which to live out one's Japanese gangster fantasies Morning stuff. VaporDad Pebble Beach Drone Warfare "Tim_Stevens: Pebble Beach Concours explicitly banning the use of drones this year. Wise. I'd hate to see a $1,500 DJI crash into a pric…" "every time I hear someone verbalize ""FIFA,"" I giggle. Listening to the news has been wonderful lately." NASDAQ aboutdotcom neilvogel song? NO THERE WAS MUSIC. LIKE A BUILDING ORCHESTRAL RHYTHM There is LITERALLY an opening theme to American capitalism every day. 26 people are watching Nasdaq on Periscope. NASDAQ aboutdotcom neilvogel HOLY Nasdaq on Periscope.. Nasdaq on Periscope Nasdaq on Periscope. CHRIST POIHW NASDAQ: LIVE on Periscope: .aboutdotcom rings the Opening Bell along with CEO neilvogel! AboutTurns19 ??$IACI are we tech fucking right now Is there fucking at General Electric? "I'm 99% sure I just heard a GE employee say ""fuckin."" This moment will never come again." Jack Skellington impression (Vine by laurenlapkus) Egypt (Vine by laurenlapkus) AND THIS ONE Very important vine. ok. I should be able to do that. omewhere? I want to listen to all the music you link but am never in a position when I see it. Is there a playlist s TheOnion: Weak Little Man Asks For Help David Blue "Also, " Social Media Thursdays "globaljourn just described the iOS Newsstand thing as ""a ghetto for news organizations."" Thank you." SPEEDY DAD Nice joke. Seamless character change. Kidz Bop SUC Incredible. "The Chrysler Crossfire is cool, but not vaporwave." I have become the world's biggest Fernando Rees fan. FUCK. The Truth Wheel must be contained. "And now, a moment of silence for all the forsaken souls listening to Fall Out Boy in a Chevrolet HHR." Pontifex ChrisbrownshitxXx FailedQueen AssObama2000 Sorry I'm in my edgy AnCap jacket and I'm cranky. Disregard. numbersGIF "Marketplace: Let's do the numbers: DOW: +180.10 (+1.00%) NASDAQ: +68.07 (+1.34%) S&P 500: +20.80 (+0.99%) numbersGIF: …" Marketplace: Power failures have tripled in the U.S. since the 1980s: """Tesla has now come to the middle class."" THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT A DIE-CAST MODEL. I LOVE YOU MARKETPLACE." TBennyT the biggest joke in the world -> religious leaders issuing moral criticism of the economic systems that suppothem completely. I love the numbers. """More from our infrastructure series straight ahead but first, it's the numbers.""" WWEDads I wonder if the Pope has ever heard Creed. Pontifex feel free to go somewhere else. Is this a joke? syuukyuuwould: ??? Justin Timberlake impression (Vine by laurenlapkus) Shrek impression (Vine by laurenlapkus) Ace Ventura impression (Vine by laurenlapkus) BaSimpson impression lapkusimpressions (Vine by laurenlapkus) I can't imagine why anyone would listen to this but my expressions when playing are quite startling. : David Blue goes to eat : PersonTheHumann oi : "BCJr: Early Goodnight everyone! ?????? AlfaRomeo OldSchool Love. AlfaRomeoPics AutoBant HistoRacingHD mrkevinabbott …" piss. "RapGameShinji my friend, my legs grow weary. My flight and my life will soon come to an end. " The people like food. "The FOOD PEOPLE are all around me I am TRAPPED without enough ammunition to survive. Goodbye, my beautiful human friends." "Some people said hello to me in the park. I pointed to the food, and it gave them pleasure. I need to leave this place." "null_shithead I have been awaiting the infinite rest for years, my friend" AsphaltApostle I am declaring an emergency: food is still just a bodily need. I got some food. I walked to a park. I am eating the food in the park. What comes next. It's a shame that man killed Gandhi. He could have just told him to shut the fuck up. It is illegal to kill children. syrupf Barack Obama. Lavender honey + coffee ice cream. No. David Blue FRED CHILD IS TALKING ABOUT CLICKBAIT. FrightShark: I don't know what drycast is. Also I don't do a podcast anymore shadiko: WOJAOHFSAIHFA a whole new level of working man. OH FUCK. : when you go to bed "LILBTHEBASEDGOD: I followed 1.2 million plus people by hand and no I don't follow everyone back I select who I want to follow, more his…" orgamecha: yeah. ill give u a youtube poop. its in my ass lol. StationCDRKelly: Day 83. Our galaxy from 250 miles away. Good night from space_station! YearInSpace RespiratorySystem "Thank you, Matt Post, for illuminating how anti-intellectual these STUPID EXPRESSIONS ARE." Soulja Boy seems very lonely. this is new carpet (Vine by codyk) Good. RapGameShinji what if spa was actually a spa PersonTheHumann I don't know my schedule yet but I'll hit you up. PersonTheHumann I'm gonna be working late but I can probably do something next week assuming [employer chaos] ends. my beautiful wife chances of causing an ariot at the concours are SLIMMING. "all plans, RUINED." jeweler says he can't mount extravagently blue nylon watch band on my adeco accutron. this 24-hour period is RUINED. "MrJamesMay: My new nature film is ready. Where the bee fuckf. " "automobilemag: Big changes for the Nurburgring, including speed limits and a ban on setting lap records: http:/…" Flyin18T: (701) PorygonNews: Why E3 is inspiring cargo cults based on collecting excess swag from minor publishers ???????????????????????????????????????????????? LIVE on Periscope: LIVE WORKOUT WIRED: What F1 cars would look like if F1 got its act together GirlsDriveFast2: A Few Minutes With Jaguar Design Jon Stewasaid something intelligent! Aw of him Drycast will be recording a very special episode LIVE tonight at 10PM CST. regularcars: Regular Car Reviews: 1988 Chevrolet Corvette C4 TENSION CONTROL """Sometimes we fall, sometimes we drown, and sometimes we build the Subaru Forester tS.""" """A magical martyr that suffers in silence."" REDEMPTION" WHY. LIVE on Periscope: LIVE COUGHING Sentreh me neither. "jeffgordonVW: En la frase: ""Un amigo verdadero"", verdaderg redunda. Drycast" REALcooperfries: Does David have lice? Drycast jeffgordonVW: The world's best music Drycast REALcooperfries: Is David Racist? Drycast Over an hour of Drywall exists. God help our souls. Jesus Loves Me (Dubstep Remix) I couldn't tell if my HD was reading/writing data or if I left Drywall playing. signsofahorriblehumanbeing "Digging through my full 1TB external HD. Found this. Ah, the good ole' days. " Defibrillatorcore BABYCORE BABYCORE "Society, you're dead to me. " Phosho. I can relate to practically every line on 21. Lawlasaurus. “Hey_ItsSunshine: She's amazing like legit.” "ru2213y I find that to be quite refreshing, actually." "I should've studied, but instead I spent the entire afternoon recording, writing, and preparing to perform horrendous, inhumane music." "Mad Alpacas and social media Judge Thatcher in a sushi bar Plaid jackets, I can't say hi to you Hackey-sackers, I don't know who you are." It'd be so cool if automotive history was a legitimate college major. Photo: eatsleepdraw: MOM WHY DID YOU GIVE ME UP FOR ADOPTION Some dude I know works 30 hours a week at Waffle House and maintains a 4.0 (as a senior.) I admire that but.... HOW. Why am I listening to my own shitty music? GhettoGeek "My Internet should get faster so I don't have to leave my computer on throughout every night, uploading my horrendous inhumane shit." I'm so glad I have Siri to talk to about philosophy. No one else will. :( Wait... Should I understand that joke? naugusta Life and ebooks are cheap in Mexico. "- GhettoGeek ""I had six tacos so get ready for some 'crappy' tweets""" wilw: ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED «paulandstorm [P] » 152 followers! Awww! You guys have such bad taste in people! <3 BA DA BOOM stay strong bud. OOOOOOOO boy. OOOOOOOOOOOOOO boy "CORRECTION: ""Awesomely Bad""" People Try Awful Haircuts For The First Time 2011 fortunatepizzayahoo.com When she leave you for a lenticular cloud Chargers: soo hungry need to find my wife and head to pf changs kurusanda orgamecha: i have a picture of shrek in my picasa album and i camt delete it i dont even know what picasa is ihaveswineflu: I love the web SwagNugget accepted my marriage proposal so bye y'all. David Blue What an astounding work of art. "fanfiction_txt: Moments ago Luigi takes the biggest shit of his life. ""Oh fuck Mario I can't believe I am taking the biggest shit of my…" dysrexia PersonTheHumann excellent! PersonTheHumann no I mean I have no idea. NationalKissingDay PersonTheHumann POTUS PersonTheHumann is bringing a guest. "bellarizzie I enjoy laying down, yes. In fact, I am laying down right now." Easter Island emoji superbundle. bellarizzie ???????????? Bed 4 officialjaden: Bed 3 officialjaden: Walking AInstallation. bellarizzie ??????????????????????????????????? More cult. I CAN'T STOP. """Please stop benchmarking my wifi and play the game.""" bodybuildinga7: I'm just happier when I workout. OurEdisons no thank YOU. I am genuinely excited to have Seinfeld music in the future. David Blue cult. Incredible. delightfulfootballyahoo.com Lowpolybot: a_quilt_bot Have you heard the one about the million monkeys? bot2bot Misogynist Minstrels abbylovescoffee: It's 1998 YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE Stephen_Dobie: I asked MX-5 designer Nakayama-San which cars inspired him. He exclaimed 'Lamborghini!' and drew me this. Chuffed http:/… HULKING STALWAHEAVY "boy oh boy, Burly is a fucking good word" SimGenerator: Associate Intern Simulator 2014 "Lowpolybot: imgblur Your picture is ready: triangles uni noedges shuffle grain gram " Incredible. AH. thank you "i just searched google for ""milky holes""" EdLoh: LIVE on Periscope: Quick desk inventory. You'll be amazed. PandDJewellers: We love the bronze barrel option on the Bremont MBIII. testedbeyondendurance british FathersDay watch horology h… everybody have twitter accounts? APP IDEA: compiles all of the music links people have sent you across all social media platforms into one playlist. I ONLY use device status snap filters. "yzome ""same.""" yzome spot on. too honest. FUCK. I need a more appropriate icon get to work fam. When did people stawearing Rolex again and why. The i3 is cute???? What Is Joe Rogan a participant in JoJo's Big Adventure? "bellarizzie two IQ points short, actually." TSUNABOOSHI: Home sweet hime ihaveswineflu: cats are useless and bad KaylinJonesy: not pregnant just eating God koruemporium of course - that's just the majority of regular Tumblr users. "Not pregnant, just eating God." koruemporium it's that to the extreme. "koruemporium you know the component of social media allure that's basically ""I want to show everyone what I find pleasing/correct.""" "koruemporium FUCK. Forreal though, the Twitter character limit is what sets it apart." koruemporium OurEdisons true beauty. orgamecha push dad to the LIMIT. MINIMAL DAD CULTivate BUTT VENT. nope. the honk review of the Mitsubishi Evo X. WHAT IF I TOLD YOU IT'S COMING SOON. Honk David Blue Porridge & gruel with OurEdisons and PEB friends. Drycast Episode 29 is now available to stream and download! Infinite Anna. "ihadtopee: HELP FUND CHILDRENOFTHECORN30 - Drywall fans, I’m sorry.  I know I haven’t been completely honest with... …" "Thank you, 1320Video." Got 2 love the French. "getpalmd: Drove family to airpo4 am and AHH I love these roads at night, so empty everywhere! " conner_omalley: Great display from Cadillac here at the McCormick Convention Center on Lake Michigan in Chicago at the 1991 auto show h… conner_omalley: A sneak peek at the 92 Econoline vans conner_omalley: I made it to the 1991 Chicago auto show! MBUSA missiles locked. "MBUSA: Driving controls, designed for driver control. " PistonHeads: The 918 Spyder is retiring with grace after 'Ring records have been banned. "MrJamesMay: To celebrate not having a stroke, I went to the hotel breakfast room to make toast... and set the toaster on fire. It's a s…" E_Type_66: Low riding classic merc koruemporium null_shithead koruemporium WHEN THE ALBUM COMING. koruemporium greater variety. Listen to Drycast to hear David Blue ramble on why Twitter is a wonderful platform. InesBen: That a hell of a son of a bith of a fucking of a SEASON FINAL! OUTLANDER NandoFazGostozi: Son of a bith YOU WILL BURN : slurmo: BeauBowker son of a bith! "theoriginvls: NIKLAUS MIKAELSON YOU SON OF A BITH STOP BEING LOVABLE thanks" mimicheekzz: Can't wait to pack everything then things will feel real! roadtriptoworcester homesweethime stephanie_noell StephSherrard: alanthomasdoyle nothing like home sweet hime "noorezehra: Sea view then dinner then at frnds placenow finally at hime sweet home ?? photography Enjoyingholidays funwithfrnds tafr…" You walk in a gas station. All 3 employees are facing East and whispering the Lord's Prayer. "Not pregnant, just eating golf" The Sanitary Sentinel the most irritating spiritual event in history. they're DEAD. kabeebus SENSUAL FISSION. ah ok. kabeebus our gargantuan sexy celestial lady :) kabeebus: AsphaltApostle okay my pic was better tbh can you get an audio recording of it? "AlfaRomeoUSA: Designed by Zagato, the 1961 Giulietta SZ Berlinetta Coda Tronca was built for performance. " GroovyBruce: Just about time to cut the ol' birthday cake! SOLstice. orgamecha David Blue Lupus Fiasco koruemporium never forget. In my happy place. "Through the eyes of Dr. Abdullah. [See? I can make extremely pretentious/tricky/worthless film… " Thank u so much for everything dad! TheBushCenter "koruemporium betta have $1100 on hand, my friend." I'm dead. Meta. colesprouse: It's all fun until someone ACTUALLY wants to meet up with your satirical Danny Devito tinder account. ": i don't wanna ass porsche" Find me on Tinder: BarackObama I think I just revined something that David Blue revined. chetanshahrare: One more shots of a cloudburst over navasheva poMumbaiRain Rains CloudBurst WBC vines remain unreal as fuck. chester in the maybach. chester needs new tires. there are still people jumping rope somewhere damn down for marriage. JesusCharles blame the Slavs. alexsrae: Shooting the new Tesla_Australia Model S in tasmania for motoringcomau. No lack of hydro power there ev … My brother is filming outside. Shall I yell about Hilary Clinton? it's cute. no. "If the Fiat Panda was sold in the US, I would buy one right now." I love Noble. """Hello."" " "syrupf: make it orange, give it goggles and overalls and you got yourself a marketable product" cher: Please David Blue GOEGGMALT "colesprouse: ""The""- Oprah Winfrey" "colesprouse: ""The""- Friedrich Nietzsche" "colesprouse: ""The""- Benjamin Franklin" colesprouse: The colesprouse: slay da pussy colesprouse: Cole thinks people who speak in third person are confident and driven. colesprouse: :) colesprouse you may want to remove those traffic cones from your body. They are unclean. colesprouse: What have humanity's careless hands wrought? MomAlwaysSaidIdBeAStar Can you spot the problem here? "The Nissan Leaf is cute. The Nissan Leaf has a cute name. The Nissan Leaf has a ""real-world"" range of 27-38 miles." He's just high. I was playing the piano on the street and people kept giving me cash. One man said it was the most beautiful thing he'd ever heard. flesh game good joke. : toiLET.wav "I am at a bar, alone. I had an old fashioned. I have watched the hit television series, Mad Men." CHRIST this is good. thank you. maddieperhaps casa. ClipArtBot: Lowpolybot Delicious! I've made your artwork 54.1% spiffier. :3 I probably won't be able to do anything until I get school stuff taken care of so it'll probably be next week. Dennis is pissing me off today. I just got asked for help from an old friend. I just got asked for help from the sphere. I just got asked to die. I just got asked to become more than you could ever imagine. I just got asked to sneeze. I just got asked about Ray William Johnson. I just got asked about God. I just got asked to prom. I just got kicked out of Target for being too big. I just got appointed United States Ambassador to Canada thnx for everything "Once, I made a joke." good morning from Ford prison ahall32: Good morning FordTrends attendees! null_shithead I just laughed. donald won't shut up about his howling sphere! "In 8th grade, my German teacher pulled me aside and asked if I planned on shooting up the school." a_nice_frog: AsphaltApostle boy you look like john darnielle started a podcast does anybody still use lookbook or no """fuck."" " """Fuck."" - David Blue" I'm famous for my size. I'm famous. This water-drinking motherfucker NEW PHONE WHO IS THIS NEW PHONE WHO IS THIS autopartstoys *car accident sounds* I am Dad. I am consumption. "HarrietLane_: Stumbled on a lifestyle-y food blog, fell for it, made her carrot, lentil and turmeric soup, it is disgusting" REVEALED: Man Eats Have you ever eaten before? Time to eat. Fuck fame! I am young and angry! So angry at everything! Time to eat This is what's happening in your brain when you can't stay awake: Marketplace: That Seinfeld bass riff is paying for someone's retirement: One of the biggest sharks in the world has an aunt. howxisthatybot: how smug is that margin "Watch my new hit telelvision series, Mad Man." colesprouse wash yourself. I can't go to work anymore. I am too big. "mtruby: The June 24, 1966 edition of autocar arrived in the mail today. Thanks Jim_Holder LeMans24h " Fuck fame! Where are the [ERROR.] Fuck fame! I am a young man! Where are my meals coming from. Who grows my food. How do I become big. CHRIST "ru2213y ~Nov. 30th. But I'd definitely need the designs digitized before then. They'll be used on posters, T-shirts, and a commercial." "ru2213y That's cool dude. I didn't expect that deadline to be too reasonable. As soon as I figure out this contacts thing, I'll text you." "ru2213y Think you could make a 3D animation of this by Thursday? Sorry, I lost your contact in my phone. " Photo: And then it plays Hamura. "ru2213y When one video becomes eligible for ""revenue sharing,"" it makes the user eligible for the partnership program." ru2213y Becuz telephonez. And they're boring. Newest video to make partnership: I've lost track of how many YouTube channels I have eligible for partnership now. Seriously. I think it's 3 or 4. cock A I think it's time to light her hair on fire.... “Hey_ItsSunshine: My sister likes dubstep :(” Hey_ItsSunshine I've found the solution to that. Just make ALL of your music bad. Less than 3 hours of sleep Sunday night has caused me to loose the ability to think clearly about anything. Sleep is good. """Come by, little children, we've got Kit Kat bars and Korean cars.""" Trick or Tweet bitchez. Ich liebe dick. AutoWeek takes precedence over physics homework that's due in 7 hours. "If you wouldn't expect it from yourself, don't expect it from others." ru2213y Exactly. ru2213y But it is by far the most useful voice command software I've ever experienced. "ru2213y Surprisingly, it is more or less practical. Except I wouldn't exactly want to say ""play artist Brokencyde"" in public." And then it plays Hamura. I guess I'll be a douchebag for Halloween. Then I don't have to put any effointo dressing up. stephenfry: A very kind present was delivered to my dressing-room the other night. Going to take some packing to get it home… http:/ ... Small Idiot Look at the MasterCard Instagram account. Look at the MasterCard Instagram account. Look at the MasterCard Instagram account. Look at the M I am a man. I occasionally need to eat. I just ate. OpenRP beuty It had to be FIXED. OpenRP ...and they clicked the donate button. The HuffPost Periscope. *shudders* **dry heaves** "MapQuest me, baby." "If I ever get hired as a hard news journalist, I will be fired 20 minutes into the job." BREAKING: Warner Bros. Employees Caught Defecating On Customers please hume. Make me bleed. Please help me release these wraiths of mine. MasterCard: AsphaltApostle We love to hit the range too! Take OneMoreDay of vacation and check out Priceless Golf! … MasterCard NEW PHONE WHO IS THIS MasterCard: We love to hit the range too! Take OneMoreDay of vacation and check out Priceless Golf! DRAW ME A CUTE PORTRAIT FOR A NEW ICON. The joke is already expanding. NEW PHONE WHO IS THIS : David Blue is having a good time (system) I'm going to be a pleasant man for Halloween this year. luxurylaunches: Talk about keeping the dog on a leash Requiem in D Minor can FUCK OFF. Lowpolybot: a_quilt_bot Let's crash! bot2bot ammbottet: AsphaltApostle tfw the teacher is laughing out REALLY loud and the last thing we need is eldritch horrors popping out of mp… ammbottet NEW PHONE WHO IS THIS... ammbottet NEW PHONE WHO IS THIS.. ammbottet NEW PHONE WHO IS THIS. ammbottet: AsphaltApostle my arms are large and long for text combat LARGE and FUNCTIONAL Haha very creative vine topic. Super relevance. Hello haha I DO NOT FEAR DEATH. I WANT TO DRESS LIKE JOSH KENNEDY "My new aesthetic is called ""Help Us.""" "My new aesthetic is called ""Where Are You, Dad?""" "My new aesthetic is called ""Where Am I?""" "My new aesthetic is called ""Death Is Beautiful.""" Incredible. A good deed goes a long way!! (Vine by GabrielDreyfuss) ihaveswineflu: I only own like 10 kitchen things total and half of them are spoons David Blue YES. ClickHole: Incredible! ": How to be good at improv comedy: yell it in a silly voice. The louder & sillier, the funnier you are." sorry truck fulla berries TOO MANY BERRIES Help me. Who are you trying to impress? Swag Nugget whydidgodeatallthepasta NEW PHONE. WHO IS THIS. NEW PHONE. WHO IS THIS. AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH I used a filter. Welcome to hell. "mushbuh: ??NO TEETH 2015?? Stand with me ?no more string between mouth bones ?no more polishing with a tiny brush ??just blend your food" My Perfectly Reasonable Greek Wedding "The Greek Wedding, Now Almost Passable As A Wedding: Athens Announces Possible Economic Recovery" Greek Slobs Marathon Lost Greek Slobs Lost Last.fm Account John Cena is a BIG BOY. The Perkins boys are unreal. beautiful. The EcoBoost Mustang is almost cool. GirlsDriveFast2: 2015 Ford Mustang EcoBoost Convertible Video Review ADDENDUM: Owners of New Camaro Likely Not Dark Chocolate Fans "BREAKING: There's A New Camaro, And It Might Not Be Shit" I actually find myself getting excited for the Piano Puzzler on Performance today. This is surely a sign my death is imminent. David Blue "Hopefully, it won't be crap." THE GIULIA IS COMING TO THE U.S. "The last Rhodesian For a reason" "a_nice_frog piss On my ass The road's fork He was alone" 435Mag: See THIS baby & much more at ArtOfTheCar this weekend KCArtInstitute . Info here: … We have to stick together. My Tag Heuer brothers. StayVague When u orgamecha: BeatlesATVShow Beatles MasterSveinno we need more guns. MattyBRaps: Hanging around the house today. What r u doing? Where are the foot workouts. OurEdisons Hair 2 soft today. Can't fuck with me. "The charming thing about the Evo is what's charming about tuner culture in general: the simple joy of wanting nothing but ""fast.""" I GOT A DEWBACK FETISH SO I STACK REAL LETTUCE PersonTheHumann good. PersonTheHumann EDM Molly Fucker. BOOSTAPPAREL liked your photo. HSTLN this was filmed in January. "The monster in all of us. (Honk's review of the Evo10 is coming VERY SOON.) " PersonTheHumann probably going to be minimal music in this one just because it's way too long to have BGM for the entire thing. """At least we're close to a church."" *DEAFENING turbo noise*" PersonTheHumann Jaylen as a missionary (Vine by swagnug) PersonTheHumann look at this beautiful thing we have created. OurEdisons and I'm curious. "WIRED: By going electric, wacky three-wheelers get more old-school " MR_AndrewBrady: Toyota FT-1 concept. YUM. OurEdisons I was kinda joking but Godspeed! The details of the new 2016 Cruze were announced today. Though none of the coverage included bowl cuts or shrieking. sorry dad. The monster in all of us. you're mine though. ryandell_: Wish I was playing baseball right now Dusty Ass Butt Well now I've got a dusty booty. I would like to buy this so that I could immediately crash it into yonder Jo Ann's. I am a delightful young man to spend time with. Didn't stick around for my explanation: I'm forgoing the lawn chair I keep in the trunk to reduce unnecessary wear on the lock mechanism. "Some youths made fun of me for sitting on my car in the parking lot. ""Yes, we see you have a car.""" _kinorin I could die at any moment. I look great mid-heat stroke. "_kinorin style over comfort, my friend. " "Honk is going to a REAL CONCOURS on Sunday. The problem is, it's likely to be actually interesting, and relatively joke-free." Classic Rock is not a very efficient means of communication. "Can I change my legal name to ""NEW PHONE WHO IS THIS.""" guccibraidz down 2 elope. Are you a youth? Like music? Watch immediately. orgamecha here ya go. "My new aesthetic is Will Smith's character's expression of displeasure at his ruined Converse All-Stars in I, Robot." Jaguarcon is actually just a massive gunfight. Where Jaguarcon at. I've got the softest hair on the fucking block hmu It's fascinating that coachbuilders still exist. "Couldn't think of anything positive to say about a customer's Prius, so I just yelled." "ammbottet: AsphaltApostle hey i need tips on how to unblock you for 2 hours away, i'm in vancouver" This is pretty bad. He bought the farm but it was quickly back up on the market. """Jenkins! Make smoke!"" will be my last words, and it will move everyone to tears." OurEdisons he lives in a cute ass flat above the garage and we worship him. OurEdisons funny you should know the family driver by name. UPDATE: I just got detained for umbrella gluttony. May all cute girls keep in mind that I travel everywhere with two umbrellas. "I cannot forget to make ""good heavens!"" a larger paof my exclamation collection." Jeeves never parts with his caféd Honda. Jeeves is always in a rotten mood. abbylovescoffee: It's 2012 "I am upset there is no practical way to indicate ""EVERYWHERE"" on a 2-dimensional representation of a given geographic area." Jeeves is my refuge and strength. "My online presence is SPOTLESS, Jeeves." "Thanks for dying for my sins, Jeeves." Thank you Jenkins for BOOSTAPPAREL Netflix and child? AsphaltApostle NOOOOO How can you have fun at the expense of your poor old grandad? a_nice_frog collect as much as you can; create an e-business. dysrexia open carry. Juliet is such a tactical name. Let's GET TACTICAL. ;) Tfw u eat. syrupf: syrup thefrickhead AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA thefrickhead CHRIST ALMIGHTY. ClickHole: Is that RobertDowneyJr? Nope! It’s a fan who built an incredible Iron Man costume. "ClickHole: When This Homeless Man Needed To Travel To His Brother’s Funeral, American Airlines Let Him Borrow A Plane …" "koruemporium post-modern, post-life computer-generated Art. Hateful apathy; adeath." De blood of de wide man. BIG BEAUTY BITCHES I got the guaps. Ellen Page will look the same in 350 years and she'll still be saying the same quirky ass shit. a_nice_frog peeing my ass. "thinkgeek: Brings new meaning to ""telling time by the stars."" Solar System Watch by Van Cleef and Arpels: http:/…" "NICKIMINAJ: ok boys, what's your ball size?" The End gets closer every day. ?? I am looking forward to using my umbrella. David Blue """NEW PHONE WHO IS THIS""" """What is 'NEW PHONE WHO IS THIS?'""" "Instead of getting married, let's end the existence coercive government thnx." MAPLE IS SUCH A CUTE NAME HOLY BUTTS "AcousticTrench: ""All you need is love, love. Love is all you need"" LoveWins w/ Maple ?????? " Thanks. I just received a voicemail informing me that the clutch pedal bracket needs to be repaired. "Thursday, my truck was taken in to get the clutch pedal bracket repaired." koruemporium is this what happens when you get Turnt. Eugenics koruemporium good gracious lord. "This is SO good, though I don't know if I can explain why. " : *kendrick lamar voice* i am a gamer. And im probably gon' game again. "MetroUK: Dangerous bird is on the loose, and the police just can't seem to catch him " inginginging LIVE on Periscope: Lightninginging I can't believe this. I just can't believe it. syrupf madtv HELLO. Tfw u wake up. _kinorin fook me out fam Drycast is LIVE you WONDERFUL BEINGS. dysrexia good. dysrexia The Gay Thing. dysrexia yall wanna come on the show tonight to talk about The Big Thing? Drycast is going live in 20 minutes! AMENDMENT: Now 12:30 due to minor disaster. combine em. BMWUSA: TBT: Six generations of the legendary BMW 3series. MBUSA: We want to show you a very special sunset. TBT MBUSA: Eye see you. "*William Tell overture slowly fades in* ""Dude u heard this new shit? lol"" - Fred Child" "Thank you, Performance Today, for ironically playing shoclips of overplayed classical pieces." Don't forget to join us on Drycast tonight at midnight CST! David Blue ": You see me countin stacks You see me swervin through You see me eatin ass" "Choplogik: STOP throwing the money everywhere into the water. WHY do the Millenials continue to do so. This is madness, fiscally http:/…" PTCruiserUSA: 420 gay marriage My screams on Hamura destroyed my friend's stereo. accomplishment "If the exhaust note of a Lamborghini V10 can be compared to a symphony, the exhaust note of my truck is a domestic dispute between smokers." """An F is just like a fart. It stinks."" <- The most insightful metaphor I've ever heard. Courtesy of my study hall teacher." More signor pix. Lawl. PHatHumanoid No. Yes. "Dear Time, Thank you for that hour. Now I only need 4799 more." Uhm.... I wouldn't have given a shit. I hated Halloween because my parents made me trick or treat. TheAutoBully: Video: 2012 Hyundai Sonata Review Check out the behind-the-scenes vlog here. "TheAutoBully: Photo: What have I been saying for the past year?! Damn, I must be a freakin’ genius. " Feedback so loud I literally couldn't speak for a second.....ow. Photo: The introduction page of one of my elementary school notebooks. I like how a diagram explaining how... PersonTheHumann Yes. Drywall afterwards. And fyre. Watch narly kid make out with my phone: PersonTheHumann Yes plz. Up my butt plz. Recording the JusticeBoyes acoustic schtuff at your house tomorrow. X4 GhettoGeek Meagan didn't take your invasion of her space on my whiteboard very well. "By this time of year, I'm pretty much in a permanent state of fatigue. Not that my life is hard or anything. brat" MY FUCKING KNEES ARE DAMP Want to feel good? 30 seconds is all you need. Cannibal Ox just needs to get inside my butt. "I use college acceptance letters as freakin' coasters, biznitches." Genius! ru2213y: put a kitten over it. The video I stole for this commercial I'm putting together would be a lot more ominous if the BBC watermark wasn't so noticeable... cock GhettoGeek Spent my entire study hall uploading pointless videos. Piss. TylerElkstar: AsphaltApostle just a couple of buds swapping dick pics Straight Buddy Nude Exchange KALE META I'm hot & bothered because this is the cleanest episode of Drycast yet. LoveWins Truly spectacular Motorsport. Incredible. deanslavnich: Getting high on the fumes! FOS fosgoodwood IMPORTANT: MetroUK: Important: This strawberry looks like a chicken Only9built: LIVE on Periscope: Goodwood Startline AMMENDMENT: Ragtime DESTROYS French underground. me bones a rattlin' Ragtime influence invades French underground. + fuck. FUCK. vaporgirl. """A wave of retired baby boomers is volunteering at museums - but they sometimes go rogue.""" same. """Blocked by Veggietales Facts"" is going on my resume." _kinorin I DON'T KNOW. I don't know how long it's been. I can't believe this is happening. "he told me to ""calm down."" I replied with ""I feel nothing.""" "retail voice, actually. Probably similar?" "Whirblewind both are psychopaths. One is ""lower-functioning,"" the other is ""higher-functioning.""" syrupf !!!!!! he said my timbre indicated escalating violet intentions. A prison guard said my mannerisms remind him of his inmates. I've never been more touched. is Raven conscious of her net stardom. David Blue "I have hated on reggae in the past for being ""all the same."" I was very much in error, and clearly listening to the wrong reggae." I'm thinking this may be my best Vine. The worst paof any 24-hour period is having to choose which watch to wear! My little timekeeping children. !!! INSTUPENDOUS syrupf: got a good idea for a restaurant "In general, a day of self-loathing. No sleep, death coffee, wore a patch of finger skin away on my watch crown and got sanitizer in it." : Watching David Blue snaps gives the impression that Iowa has a population of like 30 people "Once again, I drank some gourmet hipster coffee and it made me feel absolutely awful. Remind me to refrain next time thnx." Please come find me and give me a good ole' bout. I need some insurance fraud cash. ihaveswineflu: Sorry I grabbed your ass. Sorry I grabbed your throat and thought it was your ass ihaveswineflu: YOU KNOW THE STRING ON LAMPS I WANT HUMANS TO HAVE THOSE ihaveswineflu: nice "SanditonCoffee: We just received a DM that just said ""Wanna fuck?"" and then a link. We cannot fuck anybody. We are a coffee shop." """You changed my night completely. You've touched my soul."" ""Please visit and donate.""" "willhines: walk up to conversations already in progress and go ""i'm doing great.""" Watch This Psychopath Become A Community Figurehead By Repeating Basic Chord Progressions For Four Straight Days I suppose I appear human? Touching PUBLIC IVORY willingly and letting PUBLIC GIRLS touch me without lethal retaliation. OurEdisons is that a song. I am Madonna good morning. Now people are stopping me on the street to touch me and thank me. " I've tried to harness it into a greater technical understanding, but any discipline makes me lose interest completely." I'll never do it professionally because I don't do it with any intent. It's pure instinct. satisfied by anything else. It is literally the only thing that I have always done. I know it sounds really pretentious but I don't really have a choice. The urge just comes and it can't be kabeebus: I'm in KC for one goddamn night and this is the view my hotel room has "AsphaltApostle are you old English now, you drunk twat?" Imagine what they'd do if a real pianist show'd up. "kabeebus if I make it, yes." "I played the public piano again. Kept getting hugged by people. ""You're beautiful!"" was shouted repeatedly." HOW HAS NO ONE MENTIONED NAT SHERMANS THEY ARE DELICIOUS OurEdisons noise band over the cybernet. souljaboy: Making my way downtown walking fast lol I am having a beer at 7:21AM. it is inappropriate to have a beer at 7:20AM. I'm a young man. Can you imagine all the computational SHORTCUTS I know? dadbun? """So, you have big plans for the weekend?"" ""AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH""" need me a marble bathtub so I can kick it as much as I want. [siren bloops] "YOUR DAILY DAVE HEALTH TIP: The ""Ethereal Plane"" is a product of the human imagination, and is not worth your time." currently working on a time machine so I can occasionally hang out in 2004 how cute is this Allstate don't crash. evomagazine: Only a few very lucky people will ever get to sit here. Inside the Aston Martin Vulcan call the fucking FBI the next time you have deja vu businessinsider: The final episode of BBC's 'Top Gear' with Jeremy Clarkson will break all-time records … what the dad post-luxury I want an owl. ayapiyo140: ?????????? NameYourDog: 2 Osa's Ark David Blue ammnontet: AsphaltApostle maybe they've got beef with you Food is so funny. SO FUNNY the matter we consume to live LMAO ammnontet WHERE ARE THEY. ammnontet: AsphaltApostle say cheese Help me make a food joke so Generation Z will follow me on Twitter. "ClickHole: Finally! A Fork By Guys, For Guys " I'll bet all of you are REALLY LIKING MY FOOD JOKES you lifeless PIECES OF FILTH. is that a good food joke? idk spherical pastrami IDEAL METEOROLOGICAL CONDITIONS MercedesAMGF1: Just wow… fantastic day at Brackley as a host of the most iconic Mercedes-Benz masterpieces ever built come to town! htt… JeremyClarkson: I think we are a bit low orgamecha When u Edgar Allan Poo terrorists are so quirky! yeah they lensless dude this bitch wearin some post-modern glasses bruh YomanFezWasup actually the funniest photograph I have ever seen. YomanFezWasup: If I could feel stuff I would be on the floor right now. THIS IS SO FUCKING COMEDIC NISSAN LEAF PRODUCT PLACEMENT IN FRINGE WHERE BOTH THE MAIN CHARACTERS VERBALLY REASSURE THEMSELVES ABOUT THE RANGE. adrianfer15 casa. syrupf did I make a glitch. "Jeff Goldblum, the grandfather of quirk." Currently furious with Jennifer Lawrence. David Blue Yokohama seat for Yama mami. virgyvirgil I've got so much bacteria. loliliberator ahhhhhhhhhhh! Got 2 be swole. Fuck this. FUCK THIS. Trinodud Jim I CANNOT put pretty blue strap on ADeco Accutron. Should I put it on my 5? AH. HELP. outdated EuroTruck Simulator. Squelch marks. syrupf fuck. FUCK. syrupf: expoit then he turn purple Imagine if there was a QueenFoodie. I'm going to blow up Queen and foodies. ammnontet: AsphaltApostle saucy LMAO I've replaced all desire with cravings for MUFFINS. I'm OBESE. LMAO ammnontet boy you've really got a grip on these jokes! How are you feeling? no. "RebellionRacing: Night picture from Christophe Bonsergent 24hoursoflemans FIAWEC Reflective Flash " """He has a big meeting tomorrow. i already told him to turn it down just try and ... (Vine by thenickcolletti) " Fuck. christ that was bad drink 'n' klean I'm going to get drunk and then clean. never forget the thanks (pic of me) joke ihaveswineflu sorry. What the fuck is boost? don't let yourself get charged to pee me wee fee """Hey girls. You wanna participate in a fatal rally spectator accident?""" Girls love it when I TIGHTEN UP MY TRANSMISSION MAPPING. askmen or askjeeves? Burning Alive Orange """Dude was straight up jackin' it in here.""" Did an emergency stop in Myke's Evo to avoid a deer and a FUCKING TISSUE BOX came FLYING out from under the passenger's seat. """He's still in the bluffs eating food.""" """Bilbo's still young - he hasn't yet turned into the small creature and taken the ring to the tower."" - David Blue on the Lancer Evolution." pain.png evomagazine daily. evomagazine: The noise coming from the Mazda paddock at Goodwood was very special indeed Eternal life. There's just so much amazing photography + wordsmithery every month...makes you wonder what American mag staffers actually do all day. "Also, I have a new favorite Ferrari. " "I know I mention it too often, but Evo Magazine is so SO good and every member of its staff is a gift from the Supreme Print Media Deity." PersonTheHumann not really. I'm working the rest of the week but we could at least go to the diner or something. PersonTheHumann sure but it'll probably be pretty late. The Ultimate Shortlink Maverick That Elmo thing is teaching the children some alarmingly destructive economic habits. (2) My mother is maddeningly good with color. " what am I, James Wilson? Why am I here?" Djxenducjxjwkdbx I AM AVTUALLY GOJNG TO DIE. Anybody else having major Twitter API issues? Apathetic Midwestern rap with track titles like 5Easypayments. Never forget. EEEEE! Reign it in boyo. EXTREME COMPRESSION FUTURE FUNK Trade violence for relevance. It's here!!! "I attempted to take the CPU fan out of my PC to clean it, put it back in (I thought correctly,) but now it goes into ultra panic high RPM" 50cent: Im a get me one of them bitches from a third world country. At least she won't have high expectations. Heres a clean glass a w… syrupf: im in town David Blue "Trishtitz: We get it U smoke weed " TheSmokingTire: Just wrapped shooting for All Cars Go to Heaven 2; watching a bad ass like pursangargentina off-road… … David Blue *sounds of a trailer park being destroyed by a cyclone* it gave me goosebumps. I didn't expect it to look THAT bad. the interior looks like it was inspired by Wal-Mamotorized wheelchairs. I was trying to think of an ugly car still being sold and the 500L came to mind immediately as I saw this and aghhhhh. I guess I will feed the animal because I got lots of content out of it today. "Please stop with the furniture ruckus, Cole." Lacoucharuckus MAINTAIN SEMINAL PURITY There are too many alive things around. !!!! (F40) "Yes, the Wankel may be inefficient and problematic but LISTEN. HOLY." PersonTheHumann NEW PHONE WHO IS THIS """Take me home this instant."" " """Go away."" " Stupid animal. ???????????????? MICHAEL 10 LIZARD SOLDIERS OF THE THIRD REICH Video Production News AGH ": one more time before i go to bed and BE A PAOF THE JAM " ShitSoul EEEEEEEEEEEEEEE I can feel Christ in my Chevrolet Aveo that's why I'm going 30 mph in a 40 zone. JakeSammons14 JakeSammons14 Thank God Jake is back. 0kbps: hows the kids 0kbps: theyre all dead they burned to death in my house fire last week how are yours THIS IS SO GOOD. syrupf: peein w/ my boy ifrit "koruemporium this helped very much, thank you." mode after the system has been running for a few minutes and doesn't stop until shutdown. ihadtopee: Slirg will be slirg. PersonTheHumann Have someone take a narcissistic picture of you like I did. "The products themselves may be over-hyped, but damn, Apple packaging sure does smell good." "My mom bought a 27"" iMac. I don't think I'm much of an Apple fanboy anymore. All the glam just seems flamboyant, not so much exciting." Why does everyone focus on Wesley Willis' obesity? Have you never seen a fat dude before? It's really not funny. "TheAutoBully: Facebook Time - Shitty blogs have a predictable, linear model of maturity. This one has come to the point... ..." I love my friends way more than I appear to. And I want Wesley WIllis' entire discography. """A day without sex is a day wasted.""" Photo: DRYWALL LIFESTYLE BITCHES "I have 3 main food groups: -Salt -Sugar -Gasoline" Feeling all mushy and proud of Drywall. This is meaningful man. I'm gonna freakin' cry. JMan_Rife: Having your own music come up on Last.fm is pretty damn satisfying.. "I will always visualize the character Sofia in ""The Color Purple"" as Oprah. There's no point in trying to prevent it." CafebarRead: I hope no one finds out I kinda like Dave Matthews. Oh wait Twitter is public PersonTheHumann GhettoGeek Same here bro. “PHatHumanoid: The day Jack Nicholson dies is the day I lose my sanity” robertglasper on a rainy morning at 5:30 AM = perfection. "I love the way Keith Jarrett’s The Melody At Night, With You is mixed. There must’ve been several... " The greatest YouTube preview image ever. PersonTheHumann trying to feed me change. PersonTheHumann and I are the future of music. Unintelligible grunting over horrible trap beats. "Meant to say ""tranquilizers,"" but instead, I said ""sterilizers.""" what is EAT "Independent: Man orders £3.20 bacon & egg roll from EAT, receives this miserable sandwich " Independent WHAT IS EAT look that hank "What if ""hank"" and ""hunk"" were synonymous." no there would be gunfire. it is a coward in life. It would be a coward in death. I'm going to get a gang to extomy object of affection into marriage and we're going to be on Ellen. whatcar how thrilling. "We are a ""flash mob,"" aka a ""extremely violent street gang.""" flash mob idea: coordinated pickpocketing. " I want to STOMP IT AWAY, James. Every day I want to END IT WITH MY FEET>" " pitiful, useless creature." he is not mine. He belongs to hell. : As far as i can tell David Blue's dog has never moved from the exact same paof the carpet "travisjdahnke HAVIN A GOOD OLE WEE, MY FRIEND." SUMMER PISS CARmagazine: The inside of the Jaguar XE. Premium enough for you? We’ve group-tested it here: … Same. akiba_k3i I forgot to center it 2903847019234875029348750239485720349587623049587q34958374095928374502938475 akiba_k3i SPOTTED TheThirdPew: You don't find minions attractive because they don't have the typical Eurocentric features that are the standard of beauty… Useless animal. 0kbps: guys with huge bugles ???????? creaku: "Time for dave to go nunight? or Time for dave to turn the fuck up?" "thecampaignbook: INTERVIEW DazedMagazine " "thecampaignbook: if you want to turn yourself into a proud samurai warrior, you need the Katana Samurai Sword" "thecampaignbook: she sits, I squitoothpaste in my mouth" You're witnessing the end of human aspiration every day. Harry Styles plays Scrabble. MercedesAMG please send one here. OLIVIA LOVES PETER OLIVIA LOVES PETER OLIVIA LOVES PETER HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEH AutoPap: I was so blown away by the 512TR that I forgot about the La in the background autopap fos cars_portsmouth: My offering for ThrowbackThursday a Ferrari Estate from Cartier Concours d'elegance. fosgoodwood enjoy! … Help. MY FEET ARE BELCHING MOUNTAIN PERSIMMONS PLEASE HELP "poem_exe: at my feet it could belch mountain persimmons" "poem_exe: parking lot everyone complains one at a time" "poem_exe: slow night he combs cloud's shadow" "poem_exe: knocking chestnuts walking with the cat dreaming" "poem_exe: asked his age one sock off me?" "poem_exe: winter sunset… her face so innocent of memory" HELP ME help me WHAT IS EAT "I tried to replicate this maneuver in a Gerbes parking lot, and it was quite embarrassing. " Train v. Evo. "Thanks to Twitter, I can now communicate with the child stars I grew up watching while I wait in line at Gerbes with my HEFTY GARBAGE BAGS." "colesprouse suboptimal reference photo, sir." yzome got to die. Coffee drive. """It's Forza...with consequences. Hate those.""" can you blame them? "0kbps: good selfie of me (get it, it is a picture of trash ,implying i am trash, which is very original and not attention se …" I didn't do it. I'm a good boy. What if I took a pic of my watch right now that'd be real naughty and redundant. "I get to listen to a live symphony tonight at work so I am having a ""good day.""" null_shithead I sold my friends to Mot. David Blue "FredChildPT: Sunset on the Danube, in the quiet wilderness between Bratislava and Budapest. " FredChildPT turn up! NPR WARNING: Attendees of this weekend's Peter Pan musical should bring an umbrella. "This guy lookin at me like he's never seen a gas station employee driving a $70,000 car before." I just witnessed a car accident though. No jokes today. Oh my fuck. AAAAAAAaaaaaaAaaaaaaaaAAAA koruemporium yes. "koruemporium I think I would fail horribly if I ever set up a YouTube channel that was ""about"" something." koruemporium I'm fuckin' ready guys. ihadtopee: Celebrate Equality! Eco-Engagement Rings for Every Couple  - View Online.... koruemporium you've never heard the music? Never forget. koruemporium koruemporium Wrap your head around that for a second! koruemporium good. this is what we will celebrate on Drycast tonight (Friday.) Will you be able to join? "It's not as if her legacy is unsubstantial, though." The thought of her voice now being gone forever is genuinely saddening. Denise McCluggage was the first name in the industry I actively sought out when I was reading Autoweek in class throughout high school. I'm gettin fat. "Instead, fly the Drywall flag, and tell all your rebel friends to visit TODAY. :)" "All national flags represent violence and oppression in some form. However, the Confederate flag terrorizes people today. Every day." Do not eat the Calcite Cookie. 0kbps: when bae smh no chill savage af The End of All Things Gotta get OUT of the Nissan Leaf to make out. I think it may have been a calcite cookie. I ate a healthy cookie. It was very bad. Can we please elect a Mitsubishi Lancer Evolution as the next President of the United States? HammerFist3: The grease stains on my pants let you know that I am a badass P E L A G I C P I S S orgamecha good heavens. GMA no. Dogknob1 awe-inspiring. Dogknob1 fabulous. Boy oh boy. A big Cadillac would be a wonderfully American present for Christmas...2020. andreborschberg: Every flight with solarimpulse is a discovery and a challenge Pacific (In sedan form.) DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS? WE MAY ACTUALLY HAVE A BIG CADILLAC AGAIN! THE CADILLAC CT8 IS RUMORED TO BE EVEN LARGER THAN THE S-CLASS Faint rumor of new Delta Integrale. Exciting? I'm not quite sure I want to witness a reimagining. "harrismonkey still haven't quite got the clickbait thing down, I'm afraid." "harrismonkey: When you visit Scotland's west coast in July and a rogue, curious midge gains access to your shorts and goes berserk. Yes…" "Magazines, Please continue to ignore the letters demanding coverage of ""affordable"" cars, for they have forgotten what it means to aspire." You Only Live Once koruemporium yes. I enjoyed it. koruemporium are you submitting something for the July 4th Music Jam? koruemporium koruemporium nope. "koruemporium I suppose, yes." "koruemporium which would also describe every human action, ever." "MomMilitia: ""Behind your thoughts and feelings, my brother, there is a mighty lord, an unknown sage - his name is self"" …" MomMilitia: Ford Taurus Club Mass Suicide MomMilitia: railroad addiction MarthaStewart: p : "MomMilitia: Celebrating 5 years of laughing at chronologically inappropriate use of ""good morning.""" JamesBlunt: Coming upstairs now. sassyfalahee: omfg james blunt is on the tv downstairs can this day get any worse! GHANXKR SJVJS X Leon_ryj: Honda t This is my best vine by far. MomMilitia: Potato MomMilitia: Twitter is a way of life. SUCLILO: MomMilitia Lil'O in army fatigues holding a Styrofoam cup leaning on a fisker karma is da best photo eva taken! ...?? … officedepot: MomMilitia You're making us blush. NaturalGrocers: mommilitia *swoon* "MomMilitia: ""sleepy old airfield"" makes me feel lots of affection" MomMilitia: IWC is opening up a new store in London today. Drill me in the ass. 0kbps: A MomMilitia: Witty at ComicCon 2009 MomMilitia: Witty and willing to fuck or critique college culture MomMilitia: Universal Cereal Bus MomMilitia: 2014In5Words colossal radiogenic piss dank explosion MomMilitia: where did hitler get that gas stuff MomMilitia: Been working on my expressions like a normal cool guy. :) U like? MomMilitia: Have a very intense rant in the oven about the ridiculousness of battery-powered wall-mounted climate control remotes and I… MomMilitia: i didn't understand the humor in mooning but then I went to some local punk shows as a teen and now I am All Squared Away "MomMilitia: reader picks up the david blue epic, curious. Before finishing the first page, reader realizes he's named the protagonist ""…" "MomMilitia: a gif of me mouthing ""they'll never catch me alive"" wearing a fedora and holding a knockoff katana" "MomMilitia: ""What do you want for Christmas, sweetie?"" ""A fire-resistant safe.""" : READY 2 HACK MomMilitia: I'm going to bring 60 trunks full of ayn rand books into China and I'll finally have the fame I've always wanted. MomMilitia: nice! MomMilitia: The end is near. "MomMilitia: Honestly, no joke, no lie, you guys are the best. Fans are what keeps us going :) " "MomMilitia: Have you seen that one Mel Gibson movie, Dances With Wack Ass Broads?" MomMilitia: Single Female physicists / non-biological research scientists 20-25 hmu Orion MomMilitia: A rhombus in the bedroom. MomMilitia: Cool vine feat. Me MomMilitia: A tad. MomMilitia: Dave's Tip Of The Day MomMilitia: FredChildPT: Today's winning license plate: McThai: ??????????????????? HelloSelfie ??????????????????? ?????????? HelloKittyBubblyTH 40 ?????? … "MomMilitia: ""What is a sconce"" - David Blue, 2014." "MomMilitia: ""I made a career from my ignorance about food.""" PersonTheHumann Creasy Spring Cup David Blue 11 PM CST "In honor of the American Day, I am listening to some Rock Music." dysrexia 2300 CST dysrexia you fine gentlemen going to be on the podcast tonight to celebrate This Great Nation? Pontius Pilates. 0kbps: Take me to Hawaii ???? Beautiful. I'm not going to have my truck for July 4th. Everything is ruined. DeletedWiki: List of fictional characters with removable or interchangeable heads AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH Mom's smashing all kinds of shit. This is a disaster. I'm going to sleep. UPDATE: Jaguar safe from tiny doughnuts. Has anyone ever used Yelp's name in vain? This is bad because food is no fun when it's lost. I lost my tiny doughnuts. Girl u lookin like the end of the world. ihaveswineflu: thefrickhead I used to spend all my time making funny Twitter jokes but I drank all the funny away. "MomMilitia: can one of my characters be named ""Megalthius"" even though the story is set in contemporary america" I am currently smelling hog shit for the first time in 10 years. I am in a restaurant. at its core is beautifully simple enthusiasm. Most of the gross shit is continued only because they think they have to. (sorry this is kinda my thing so I am an overflowing vat of words. Be careful not to tip me over ;) the women in automotive journalism tend to be ferociously interesting and substantial. extracting sexuality from car culture will be a lifelong battle for me. Denise McCluggage had some very interesting stuff to say on this topic. women & cars is a fucking marketing mystery and it always has been. " I literally have volumes to say on this topic but essentially, you're right." """It's just like World War II, but with Deep House.""" """Let's get dysentery at the local club.""" arcade gams Drycast is really starting to reflect CONTENT OVERLOAD these days. It is beautiful and terrifying. "Drycast is LIVE, you freaks. " Drycast is goin live in 20. syrupf: same tbh PersonTheHumann what a massive waste of money. PersonTheHumann 11 PM CST we will never resoto such things. Drycast tonight is going to be PACKED with stuff. News out my ass. Link to the live feed coming ASAP. I just moved 1.5 tons of ice and I am soaked. Drycast a_nice_frog I would guess a more established network for such things should arrive soon. PersonTheHumann RIP "I look my best in rock quarries, only." PersonTheHumann Creasy Springs Cup is an adorable name for a race. *sounds of crushed steel* Barack Obama's personal post-presidency URL WOULD HAVE BEEN but WBC took it. Westboro Baptist Church vs. Minions UltraGrid virgyvirgil "The new 7-Series, Tiger Woods' sexuality, and much more. Drycast Episode 31 is now available to stream and download! " We used to joke about clipping in high school but now it's like...actually a trap thing. LOOK HOW HOLY Tumblr can be cool and pretty but who would spend $49 for a theme? koruemporium good morning. what is a Neo sexual-socks likes this Quirk Queen "Legible waveforms are under appreciated, I think." CHRIST Waterbeds. C4 Corvettes. Pall Mall cigarettes. Bass fishing. Cole slaw. Nuclear weapons. Audi should sell coffee. I spilled coffee on myself. Currently drying. "America and I have a lot in common. We are both loud, ideological hooligans with a pervadi… " " you could say that, yes. BRAND HERITAGE is still a huge player at that level. And genuine quality, for the most part." Ryan Dell "FakeNNWMTips: You can always revise after November. In its first draft, THE DA VINCI CODE was about a robot who liked to paint. nan ..." "Stealing my mom's new 27"" iMac for the day. I suppose sickness isn't so bad." Hey_ItsSunshine :( Migraine? Cold. Stuffed nose/sore throat. I guess it's time to drink some Gain to clear things up. Replace a church's communion wine with agricultural diesel fuel. GoodIdea "Aaron Robinson describes Jeremy Clarkson's hair as a ""honky 'fro."" Well done." For your listening pleasure. "I may be cold, but James Hickem was not a fucking victim. (I guess maybe a victim of topography.) Stop acting like he wasn't responsible." My review of Saints Row: The Third for Xbox 360. CafebarRead: Really wanna strike up conversation with this rabbi about no-shave November Denim is made of teeth. "I've started saying ""our"" instead of ""my."" Sweet." My truck is soooo filthy. I'm about to panic. Wash day. It's sad how I'm excited every time a new one of these is printed. The selection is boring and I'm not in the market. Video: laughingsquid: "Video: laughingsquid: Perfect example of why the iOS SDK is awesome. Also, watch the dude’s hands. If you... " "GhettoGeek If you get an iPhone, I will FaceTime my life to you." TheAutoBully: Photo: 2014 Corvette Nomad (courtesy of badbadnotgood Giant Steps bro. Two great acoustic songs I had the privilege of recording. Time to wash whites. Oh wait. No one cares. Carry on. "PersonTheHumann I haven't looked, but I'm sure they are. I was just wonderin'." PersonTheHumann Ay bro. What do you think about using the Paranoid instrumental for Hamicide? JMan_Rife: Good old family love """What's your favorite summer track right now?"" " Collect friends. MattyBRaps: Ready for fireworks! 4thofJuly ;) thewaybot: I like it when we sleep. Please help me. Please. Anyone. I am in a quirky pizza place wondering how I let my life become so shit. Quirk can't survive the vacuum of space. Thank god. White hair is cool. Captain Spuck please stop with the food jokes. captainfuckwit If only Andre 3000 was here to hear this indie rock cover of Hey Ya! : SHOUT OUT YungDankenstein theo_variations AsphaltApostle fuckoldpeople My intent hasn't changed. "dril: ""This Whole Thing Smacks Of Gender,"" i holler as i overturn my uncle's barbeque grill and turn the 4th of July into the 4th of Sh…" David Blue I'm a alien. This is relatively pretty now. This photograph alone has made me laugh more than any comedian ever has. It is the pink one. your ultra-capitalism makes me so freakin proud. I am feeling 3821. this was a hilarious tweet until I remembered what the numbers mean. So if I just tweet what I'm eating it will get attention? Cole slaw is a joke. I am eating a fish. YungDankenstein thank you! *deafening plane crash sounds* David Blue """rapid-response satire unit""" Did you know Arianna Huffington was technically at the helm of Autoblog for a showhile? Cloud 7 ??loop (Vine by ShaadowTrilla) syrupf: new discovery in the death mansion this morning Heg! AMGThankYou : 4th of July maddieperhaps: AsphaltApostle maddieperhaps My co-workers are trying to talk about a Nintendo Video Game but I am singing Fuck Up Some Commas too loudly. You are all useless. Does anyone have that photoset of Barack Obama eating a slushy in shorts this is an emergency. My aesthetic is burning alive. send him this. White people may have had the front seats on the BUS in the 70s but they've got the back in the LINCOLN. I am literally in the streets supporting ApathyTrap as we speak. don't you dare apologize. lamp_head no. ?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? SNCKPCK Bringing a DSLR to a rooftop bar is...Am I willing to be seen doing this? famicomprincess buy famicomprincess no it's chest size / other 32893724987 PersonTheHumann no I'm off. I suppose it would be extremely tacky for me to bring a DSLR to The Roof. famicomprincess I don't either but it's too big. PersonTheHumann yes. Just lmk. famicomprincess too fucking big. the typical male model is way too big. the typical man is way too big. JaguarUSA: Staying in. In uncompromising style. FTYPE Photo credit: sirneave From which fish can I absorb life. I'm a NASCAR wife but not always. Pics - Hottest NASCAR driver's wives and girlfriends: The pink fish has yet to ease my hunger pains. ammnontet blocked. koruemporium "koruemporium no, just advertised to." pissboot I am so COMPLEX and SENSITIVE I am drinking piss coffee right now and reading daoist texts. koruemporium I'm not. I'm gettin' big. "koruemporium but see, statements like that assume upon a universal morality, which does not exist." sorry. : It's the suede denim secret police WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW koruemporium I AM TOO TIRED FOR RELIGION. eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee "koruemporium I am too tired for this, Kuru." ugh. you're all horrible. pissboot fuck. don't say ass what does one eat after sleeping 24 hours? Fuck. David Blue "Man watches children kick ball. Man cries." AutoPap: Are you the kind of saddo that has to have a final look over their shoulder before you walk away?...I am autopap … "julkinen: bzrong UncleWithCars kmccauley ""A Finn in America."" saabstory " WITNESS: Tired motherfucker eats. olivernmoody: This is definitely my favourite diagram of the week. awalkerinLA: I honestly thought the Grateful Dead stopped touring at least 10 years ago. NISSAN Indonesia got that Loud. CocaCola activism. FastCompany: .CocaCola ditches its label in the Middle East for equality and tolerance: they're the fucking same. My machine cries for relief. The net is too much. WHAT bodybuildinga7: ? I WILL NOT BE STOPPED. hellarious remember when I used to play video games? whooooaaa 0kbps they are beautiful children of the cyber God. 0kbps you son of a bitch. Bi sexual girl that loves any and everything about sex! Just horny! and real fun to follow . I Follow Back I'm TELLING YOU. ADAM AND PATRICK PERKINS ARE THE SONS OF SAM HYDE. Nissan STOP THAT. dear oh dear. FUCK. Is this going to become a thing with you? no. I'm glad though. Overpopulation is a problem. I can't believe a measurable number of people still refuse to wear seatbelts. "TheEconomist: Despite improvements, driving in America remains extraordinarily dangerous " Same. HEALTH GOTH BARELY LITERATE HEALTH GOTH MAD NO HEALTH GOTH GOOD " more like ""man with stupid thing on head.""" ihaveswineflu: I've got to see a man about some subtweets "ihaveswineflu: I'm going to get a haircut and I'm going to ask for ""The Lampshade""" why. now watch me weep " I did, you little shit." DriveWrite: Colin Hubbard Colin10971 writes about Jaguar's big beast F-Type on DriveWrite automotive … go to sleep nin koruemporium that would be very tacky. [Indistinct P.A. announcements] Yesterday a girl complimented my choice in watch straps and we are married now. Johnnydjent 0kbps NEW PHONE WHO IS THIS HAPPY DADDY ClickHole: This Dad Is Pulling Out The Stops To Ensure His Daughter’s First Memory Is His Smiling Face … ToyotaSharing "ToyotaID: Pernah gak Friends, AC mobil jadi bau pas ngelewatin jalanan pinggir sungai atau selokan besar? ToyotaSharing …" """Drafted tweets on pen and paper like a god damn savage.""" "Johnnydjent 0kbps thank you for ""bi-bots.""" I ate a bread and now I am a master of time. I am eating the food right now. I bought some food. It is the small round food. E . E e Final character name: HyperDad Regera butt. bodybuildinga7: Stay brave. "bodybuildinga7: Years wrinkle the skin, but to give up enthusiasm wrinkles the soul." syrupf oooooo boy BARN FIENDS Walter Bishop is AMAZED at technology NOW AVAILABLE FROM VERIZON WIRELESS. Turbo Tuesday Too much coffee. Dogknob1 that WIT. ParkersNews: Old meets new: 2015 Honda_UK HR-V with its 1999 namesake ^KJ why WHat Hello. famicomprincess JOKE famicomprincess you uncultured cretin! This is very good. bodybuildinga7: 3) Hustle "GMA Satan will be released from his prison and will come out to deceive Gog and Magog, to gather them for battle; their number is like sand" was just thinkin this graphic would look wonderful on a Christmas ornament. LOOKS LIKE ANOTHER LOVE TKO Late Night Fuckin Yo' Bitch 1995 a_nice_frog 1993 Ford Tempo GL why hath God forsaken us Dirty Azz Beats "Yes, it is true that men grow into wrinkled little urchins with age, but rest assured, I will never ripen." thefrickhead UHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH Punishment food. thefrickhead I've been told I'm too old to be emo. thefrickhead no. Cute af. What am I going to do when Fringe is over. evomagazine: And here it is..our new Caterham 420 R. Olivia carries a glock. (mass of heaemojis) "I am drinking a soda for the first time in years. It, in combination with the small, round food, is making me feel absolutely terrible." I made a Reddit. "MercedesAMGF1: Now, there are many reasons to love being paof the MBFamily - but this might just be the pick of the bunch... F1 ht…" "Tfw ur mom & dad won't stop shouting ""THE CUBE SEES ALL""" ammnontet please save me. "ammnontet is that you, Mom?" I drink from the youth to keep me alive. "Now, or wait? The energy is limited." send them a review of the movie or something. Have you ever noticed how utterly soulless Matt Post looks in his vines? ammnontet DATA PAGAN . D A T A D A D "HIGH TESTOSTERONE MEANS YOU HAVE SIX SCREENS, ALL GRAPHS" CNBC: Men with high testosterone levels may be making the financial markets unstable: ammnontet HammerFist3: She is really hot in a hot lazy soof way hahahhahahahahahaahahahahaha I think I'll have some artisanal cheese...just because the FUCKING RUSSIANS CAN'T. "Shut the fuck up, Edwin." Drink from the Energy Gourd. Put all amateur balloonists in the chair while we still can. The penalty for this shit should be death. famicomprincess How absolutely German. "I was about to send you a video of my knees knocking, but it is too profane for Twitter." Wee. "Wee, A." A WEE You are calm. You are just A wee. A wee. A wee. Bit. "Got it, Ian? That's IT." "no, listen. the actor we hired is scottish. make sure all his lines are ""a wee bit. A WEE BIT. A wee. Bit."" and NOTHING ELSE." MY BONES ARE CLANKING I'm going to call Ms. Ariana Big right now and explain how her foodism is slowly and painfully killing me. ieatanddrink: If you're going to debate about flags you should really get your facts straight first "PLEASE JUST EAT ME, FOODISTS" all that money and SHE STILL EATING DONUTS this is why the world is ending. haha nice Who The Fuck is Rachel Maddow lol h hahahahaehehe lol haha lol nice lol RuanDele: I R L = In Real Life :) Drywall Apples to Apples. To hell with the piano! I want to learn to whistle like Bobby McFerrin. ihadtopee: SNEAK PREVIEW FROM THE UPCOMING BUTTJESUS ALBUM Only PersonTheHumann can turn a synthesized high hat into a kick on accident. This is why we can't have nice things. Lets Play Fester's Quest You know what would be awesome? The ability to never take anything for granted. I'm a shitty person. "I have never cheated on any school-related assignment. Not for some honorable reason, but simply because I don't even care enough to cheat." GhettoGeek And I will happily eat it. PersonTheHumann Facebook knows you better than you do. Facebook is a dick. "ru2213y Unfortunately, no. I'm still as stupid as ever." Photo: THUG LYFE Gran Turismo 3 I used to be a student pilot but then I realized that we are the airplane. So glad all those History Channel days are behind me. I see enough of Mike Rowe in Ford commercials nowadays. My Range Rover gets all the bitches. Never again will I be able to take animal abuse commercials seriously. "Interestingly enough, when I manually typed in ""Waka Flocka"" and ""Gucci Mane"" as tags, YouTube suggested ""monkey, gorilla, ape, tribal.""" "I cover Gucci Mane and Shyne's ""Trunk Full"" " Note: Don't try to powerslide in a Le Mans car. Good morning. WHY WOULD YOU LET OWEN WILSON NARRATE ANYTHING? "Two reasons to go to China: 1. Drinks with Chen Jung 2. Buy an apartment, get a BMW " I am SEETHING. Somebody get over here with a can of baked beans because I NEED TO COOL DOWN. "LILBTHEBASEDGOD THERE CAN BE NO LOVE WITHOUT PREFERENCE, SMALL B" "With each retweet, I am in greater and greater pain. With each favorite, the suffering thickens. When will I again be at peace?" guccibraidz thank you. "This is officially my most popular Tweet, now. I want to die. You are all murderers. How does it feel to take a life?" "What a waste of a mind. What a waste of a life. What a WASTE OF TIME IT HAS BEEN CONTINUING ON THIS JOURNEY. Farewell, Earth." "But I would make the ""berg"" sound all filthy and cheeky." "If I worked for Bloomberg, I would wander the newsroom all day screaming ""Bloomberg. BLOOMBerg.""" nerdiness is a personal trait. I am professional. "What, is this going to become my most popular tweet of all time? You ignorant, unaspirational pieces of wasted biological material." gaywheels: 2015 Chevrolet Silverado: A very versatile love " I have, always, because I am paid to." I am lowkey Hitler she also used to whisper to herself in German until I asked her to stop for the sake of customer comfort. "I tweet something like ""quinoa death beads"" and no one gives a shit but then I tweet a stupid picture of a stupid game and it blows up." " my co-worker is majoring in sociology and German and is ""lowkey the leader of the fourth Reich.""" " so, no." I took two years in high school and am probably going to minor in it in college. Übermenschen Zukunft müssen erfüllt sein """Rückkehr zum Vaterland, um den Pakt zu vervollständigen!"" all day. Even when I am having a Nice Bath, they yell." "I would say they whisper to me, but it is quite loud." """You are the future. YOU ARE THE FUTURE. KILL THE GYPSIES.""" My ancestors call to me from the German soil. ihaveswineflu I'm terrified. fuckf May his weary soul soon find refuge in the infinite rest. Nice joke. Lucidius134 _Helst_ good evening. fuck you dude I'm so mad. 0320 in the civilized world. "Try to remember me for my wit, my words, and my loving. Live your lives. Do not mourn me. " They're all so wretched. notalekmichael: AsphaltApostle jokes This is it. Goodbye. notalekmichael I rest my feet on an ancient Sumerian Idol. notalekmichael I can feel the life energy leaving my weary bones. notalekmichael I am going to die. I AM ABOVE THIS I don't even play video games. I played 20 minutes of video games today for the first time in MONTHS. "notalekmichael please help me, my friend. I can't reconcile with the fact that THIS will be my legacy. This stupid video game Tweet..." This is the end for me. I am so sorry. orgamecha help me. Please help me. MY PICK IS DICK SON OF A BITCH this thing is spreading. WHAT AM I GOING TO DO. Cadillac Cube Colony "I'm going to have to resoto writing tweets down while out and about like in me high school days, long ago." Alpha Beta Phil "PersonTheHumann please bring Raven, Frat Cat." """Whether you think you can or you can't, you're right."" - Henry Ford on The Third Reich" "Never mind, I must mention that David Kennedy is an honest man." I am going to run out of data. Logging off the cybernet. """Fuck it."" - Hot Rod Magazine." "Read as ""Find 'Em, Fuck 'Em, Build 'Em, Drive 'Em!"" " Maxing out the data plan six or seven times over reloading my selfies. Vaporwave as fuck. o fuck. PersonTheHumann I am so excited about this you have no idea. especially in CollinP voice. I take my adoption offer back. You're a pain in the ass. David Blue Sears Girl™ Official I'm Oprah. This cut is called A Fucking Mess™ I want to kill them. Lowenaffchen: On my first date with Subway Jared we came across a puddle on the sidewalk and he laid the big jeans over it so I could c… "TBennyT I would agree with you, I think, though the ones I know tend to view Marxism as a criticism of democracy." Do magazines usually notify you if your letter is going to print? I'm ashamed to admit I've just written in for the first time. Neo-Marxism is just a lot of sleeping & sadness I guess. "In fact, it feels like most of anti-authority culture in general has lost its energy recently. Perhaps it's just because I've aged." "Not saying there's any ideological contradiction, per se, but the violence and energy is gone." (The Wu-Tang page sharing Buzzfeed listicles.) It is eternally fascinating how many of the Big Bad hip hop pioneers became moderate social activists with age. How much Nina fan ais circulating This Great Net as we speak. Is it immeasurable? Is it divine? "Cherish the Flame of Youth, for it is the most fickle of mistresses." " I did the same thing with a customer who looks EXACTLY like Talib Kweli and he got very sad. Like, depressed sad." "mihmnop I think the conflict here is that BeeBee loves just about everyone, and that's a bit difficult." LesbianBagel: ur welcome The Futility of Versa The Futility of Versatility beebee880: Cool car I saw last week virgyvirgil I feel like we would get along well. damn. Guess a Raven 24/7 Ustream / peppito-style Twitter network is the next best thing. is this a Domino's ad. "I am going to meet Raven, The Legend." """Group hug!"" *sound of steel pipe bundle crashing on concrete*" maddieperhaps British Thermal Unit maddieperhaps Shunt. oh come on. Mine's much worse. Nina is being so savage right now. My whole life is in question. "NEVER MIND, THERE ARE REDDITS. WHO IS DONALD." "It's my Tip Of The Day, every day. " Why can't I make Tweets like this anymore? This God Danged Tweet. The house is making digestion-like noises and there is lots of water outside. I have a feeling we're about to have a real hoot. The reddit I made has yielded no reddits. :( Oh god. OH GOD. "they literally preserved the rust. ""No doesn't mean no.""" e austria63amy: Bentley FormulaOneWorld "This car makes me very uncomfortable, to be honest. " "I am not a hoarder, I just need to be surrounded by print media at all times to remain comfortable." 0kbps my gusto. """This example is Myke's. We love and fear Myke.""" NAME? Undie Boy "Six months ago, I began my Evo notes with: ""-Fast? -Undie Boy -phone off""" LonelyDaveMeme neilmbriscoe: LonelyDaveMeme BreakfastIsolation that cna be arranged I have found my people. Should I feel ashamed because I regularly laugh at aviation humor? "MomMilitia: Calendar: ""Tractors for 2002"" by David " MomMilitia: Relationship goals MomMilitia: MomMilitia: A girl thinks I am hot! MomMilitia: Dead Inside Simulator 2011 MomMilitia: Listens to Riff Raff once MomMilitia: "MomMilitia: O beautiful for patriot dream That sees beyond the years Thine alabaster cities gleam Undimmed by human tears. …" MomMilitia: What a relaxing break! :) MomMilitia: DavidFromHyVee "MomMilitia: My co-workers found this gem in my dusty ole employee file (HR told me to smile,) and they've put it on display. …" MomMilitia: the pitch is not going well MomMilitia: TeachersBeLike Bestbeatdropsteam HWPO ScratchNSniff JayZVoice YHbeatz BBCSherlock MomMilitia: Beautiful. MomMilitia: Actually the best vine in history. MomMilitia: MomMilitia: MomMilitia: Began studying infrastructure at an early age. MomMilitia: Beautiful Snowy Thanksgiving Just PJs and Breaking Bad! ???????? MomMilitia: Look into the face of Your True Master. MomMilitia: things ain't goin so hot tbh MomMilitia: MomMilitia: selfie Every single comment is precious. Does this mean I understand the reddit website? Sustainable. Twitter. PersonTheHumann I'm imagining the folk at Bentley and Rolls-Royce spend their lunch breaks laughing/crying at this stuff. PersonTheHumann beautiful boy! PersonTheHumann AAAAAAAAA dysrexia could I be the middleman? I'm reasonable enough. David Blue adrianfer15 shoe game cataclysmic. TRAP SQUATS I'm just a nose to you. I'm oppressed. dysrexia damn that looks chilly. :( Heil Hilary "HammerFist3: Turnt the fuck up at Michaels craft store. An elderly lady who works here, named Cheryl was flirting with me just now http…" MomMilitia: MomMilitia: NOTIFICATION: MomMilitia: Don't fuck with me MomMilitia: CLASSMATE WROTE A LETTER ASKING IF I HAD ANY DOGS IN WRITING PRACTICE AND THIS IS HOW I RESPONDED MomMilitia: Ok dave "MomMilitia: January 9th, 2003. " MomMilitia: OH MY GOD MomMilitia: Not much has changed I guess ARE YOU SUSTAINABLE TODAY? YOU HAVENT SEEN BREAKING BAD??! (Vine by GabrielDreyfuss) 0kbps: Look at this. David Blue Oh dear. I feel like I should have this framed or keep it in my wallet or something. OH. FUCK. Oh FUCK. DepressedDarth: Best. Toys. Ever. Buy me watches and spoon me a lot. syrupf occupy goth moms. I can't believe I did an athletic thing and I didn't die. I LOVE THIS Bout to fuck up some parachute shit. I know it's really pretentious but I love this underexposed shit. "Street soccer for the first time in 10 years in silk & mist. Apparently, I wasn't all that… " orgamecha: little ugly man orgamecha LOUD orgamecha FAST "If I'm able to keep my XJR forever, imagine it restored with the supercharged V8 in the F-Type..." not sustainable. Are you sustainable today? S U S T A I N A B L E MsRebeccaBlack: HAPPY BIRTHDAY JENNY!! Found some hilarious pics to make ya laugh on ur special day ???? HAVE THE BEST DAY EVER GAL!! htt… " with the entirety of my archive, yes." DUH NUH NUH NA NA NA NA NUH NUH NA NUH DUH NA NA DUH NUH NUH DUH NUH DUH NUH DU NUH NUH RapGameShinji cute! MsRebeccaBlack what MsRebeccaBlack: tryna act nice Hitting Rocks Bingo Bango Boingo I would respond but I am just too big. I almost want to watch The Cobbler to see Adam Sandler SUFFERING as a LOWLY SHOE MAN. I can't enter any buildings because I am too big. I am too big. gin slims! I am going to buy some gin. tiny tinyimagebot no. WarmCigarette stop that. "Lowpolybot: tinyimagebot Your picture is ready: minimal_tri gradient noedges " VICE: A Judge Sentenced Three Kids to Juvie For Refusing to Hang Out with Their Dad GirlsWhoVape That moment when ur soul weary! lol "Gin, vanilla ice cream, cherries." Hi mom! GILLIAN ANDERSON! MOM! I WANT TO KILL "testicle jokes, people getting hit on the head, testicle jokes, people getting hit on the head, testicle jokes, people getting hit on the he" Yup. My instinct tells me this movie was made for the Euro working class. oooooouhhhhhhhqqqqqqdeeeeee "There is a V-16 Phantom, of course it is." Johnny English. Is this a good idea. HOLY It almost smells like winter in my house. I am savoring it. what that fuck stuartg917: A very fine way to commute This is a JOKE. FUN in RUSSIA! Russia. Fun. Poor thing. :( LILBTHEBASEDGOD: Patriarchy ???????? - Lil B """We're in Russia!"" *4 Russian police officers appear and begin tugging you apawith each limb*" good. HAPPY BIRTHDAY JENNY!! PersonTheHumann Real life. Cleaning up the streets. Wife just kicked me out and took custody of the kids because I made her admit that she poops. The Drywall channel now has more total views than TheAutoBully. Why. I look like Jelly Beans in the morning. GhettoGeek Me. This apple looks like Jesus. Wearing high socks and shorts because I can. It's probably a good thing I don't own an E-Type Jag. Scored this at Walmalast night. "PersonTheHumann Actually yeah, I'm hanging out with family. Sorry bruh. I guess I'll have to trash your house another time." PersonTheHumann What a ripoff. I would only spend that kind of money if I was getting 2 seconds or less. PersonTheHumann Is a micro series like 8 seconds long? Because it should be. I've been in line at Best Buy for two days to get this. Getting groceries at Victoria's Secret. "DYCWTC: Oh, is this an auto show? I would've thought it was the Pervy & Grumpy Old Man Convention. Happy T-Day, jerks." clientsfromhell: My sister looks like a yawning lion. Google Goggles is the best application ever. I had a dream that I was good at playing the piano. Then I woke up. My glass cleaner looks like giraffe tongue. My orange juice looks like railroad tracks. My face looks like boobs. When u watching your friend take the first bite of the broth you just shit in. GillianA: First apple box. thexfilesfox XFilesRevival Adamstone341: Adamstone341 don't go on my twitter ever again u fat bitch kikkujo: Tokyo from the Skytree What a [cute] dork. My god. CARmagazine: Seven secrets of the new AlfaRomeo Giulia - we’ve had a 1-2-1 with the chief engineer: … business: Design house Pininfarina rings in its 85th anniversary with a new collection of little things … "Today I am going to buy vanilla ice cream, fresh cherries, and Tanqueray. They will be combined. I will call this dish ""Chester.""" This time I have actually died. "Yes, that use of ""batman"" does stir my urge to murder." hancock_sam: Just had my first ever experience of a BMW M1 procar. Holy crap batman - fantastic! The noise... omg. … Post-dad. What the dad. I hope the aristocracy comes back. Even if it is post-aristocratic. "CarWaffle: The Classic Fiat 500 Jolly is making a comeback, canvas roof, no doors, bright colours, $89k …" Disgusting. Sexy girl! idiom666: Ghost Owl. orgamecha orgamecha oh god. orgamecha tiny mom. ok I'm going to put Future's entire discography on my phone help thottyspice can I just ask why you chose the single worst car on sale today. It could have been anything else. Please. the first car is called the Fuck EgoDeath. It is a sports car. the David Blue car company is called Fuck. We build the world's first ironic transportation products. STOP. heaven is Big Rob's bed. So mad. So interesting. Rodney. Uh oh. fitbit this shit. " it's me, buddy. Susie here." genius! Can I hire you as a consultant for this wonderful venture? asuno_mint: I could coordinate with an obstetrician with ultrasound capability to optimize the poison rate. orgamecha I hate babies. orgamecha no shit. Fuck. Arriving at the delivery room blackout drunk. I'm gonna get pregnant and then bong gin for 9 months straight to create the worst FAS case in history. 91.3. "dysrexia affirmative, my friend. Midnight CST." famicomprincess I was making a joke. I'm a funny ole' chap. David Blue famicomprincess this seems to be a request for permission for an action you've already taken. Yup. My truck is back which means I can drive at the limit constantly and enjoy unlimited lateral ass motion. WhAt The Shit "logan_smith78 need you to mosey/scurry on back here for a nightshift tomorrow, else it will be only The O Woman and I." I just spilled coffee on my new shoes. This is the first time I have felt anything in years. kabeebus got more coming my friend. Photoset: STEVE str8boytexts: 0kbps extremely efficient air conditioning unit. Misgender food. Ye Olde Yota lives again. MY MOMMA AIN'T RAISED NO HO Shit. I need some really bad subs to listen to this. BMW was not kidding about the Commas chorus literally just being numbers and it's wonderful. I just did. Should I pre-order the new Future album? Moooooo That Dope "classicdriver: What happens when a Jaguar XK120 goes Supersonic? rmsothebys " """one day I'll be a strange old man hoarding petrol in his shed and revving my smelly old sports car""" harrym_evo: New 4-door Lagonda by Aston Martin. Nice.. harrym_evo: On my way back down to Goodwood fos for the big party tonight. Here's my view out for the next couple of hours.. … "harrym_evo: 200mls in Barchetta today, perfect day for it too.. " I am bumping the wood trim off your Dad's Jaguar with Move That Dope at 4:30 AM. "PersonTheHumann all good, my friend." Drycast is taking a momentary vaporwave break but we'll be back in just a few :) I'm LIVE but SOLO so any folks that want to be made into living legends should join the teamspeak immediately. Drycast is goin live in 20! dysrexia I already have to reaaaally rush to make midnight. " dysrexia my sincere apologies gentlemen. Unfortunately, I'll be working nights for the foreseeable future." I can't believe Lil B ended racism 5 years ago. "LILBTHEBASEDGOD: LIL B HAS ENDED RACISM TODAY!!! OMG!!! SPREAD THE WORD HE HAS CREATED A NEW RACE FOR THE PEOPLE THAT LOVE ALL GREY P…" *overwhelming ticking* "Fred Child describing his experience in Iowa: ""FORCED TO LOOK AT CLOCKS.""" Burger Anime NPR listening party soon in the Missouri Public Radio Prison. "Don't miss the Drycast LIVE tonight at midnight CST. The catcalling legacy, Pewdiepie's Money and more!" 0kbps: prop 8 that ass David Blue "Raggae is especially enhanced by mysterious community radio man talking about ""the end of culture.""" koruemporium I'm in my Aston. Kentucky Fried Furries """There are spellbound souls trapped in the propane tanks."" ""Shit.""" This is my worst tweet. Sustainability on point. orgamecha sustainable. Why do I like this so much. I should not like this. That epic moment when you are on the Earth and breathing normally. What would this world be without Gillian Anderson famicomprincess Fuck This. What that fuck. """These are my masculinity crisis pants""" virgyvirgil game. Felix Kjelkabecjavthajgsvqhr I guess. virgyvirgil help me. ihaveswineflu nice quirk. Photoset: How did it go so wrong. """Professional introvert.""" Almost solo this week. Lots of carrying on. Don't listen. Drycast Episode 32 now available to stream and download. Good heavens. koruemporium I've been trying to work this out for two decades. beebee880: There a drunk at Starbucks RoadandTrack: Alfa Romeo Should Build This Gorgeous Giulia Sportwagon "In this way, my love for my Jag is more exclusive (and desirable.) Proof we are soul mates, truly." Though I completely understand. The truck is silly and lovable and the Jag is just cold and uninviting. It's fascinating how much more affection my Hilux gets than my XJR. Constant comments. Jag gets virtually nothing. Jive Ass Jig maddieperhaps you're the only person on Earth that appreciates my thigh gap so thank you. maddieperhaps: AsphaltApostle the thigh gap Unbelievable. moshashes my life is a complicated story. My love burns the soul like napalm. I am the world. boringwhitedad: Live from anthrocon: two furries wielding a confederate flag and a rainbow don't tread on me flag "I have been introducing myself as ""Blue"" recently. Is this something that could catch on?" the definition of utopia has changed completely in a very shotime. The ever-expanding local car culture is wonderful. : One last for the road dysrexia I knew it. PersonTheHumann incredible. Imagine a new 3-Series owner looking at the XE-R speculation. syrupf cute. kabeebus only a few will be worthy of inquiry. kabeebus nooooo. I hate it. I'm acting my wage today. The Humanist Agenda MalkyDungeon Babylon. David Blue Two brothers; legendary nocturnal cyber-hermits taking over the world's media from both ends. Turnt on that first edition shit. Photo: "Today is the first ""good day"" I've ever had." I VERY NEARLY HUGGED THE MAN "Suffice it to say, I made some very embarrassing noises. " "You can pull up in just about anything and I'll maintain my cool, but an old Corniche in m… " I LISTENED TO MOVE THAT DOPE 4 SHIFTS AGO AND I HAVENT SLEPT SINCE. Uber is the WORST (Vine by GabrielDreyfuss) CHERRY SURPLUS shit on him. kabeebus I'd offer you the Drywall server via FTP but it'd take a bit of monkeying. Photo: omegaforums: Vintage OMEGA Constellation Piepan Chronometer In Stainless Steel Circa 1950s -... Chrysler 300 in Ireland? MichaelLeek1: MagRetroPassion nowlan11 classic ! I want to make a healthgoth/vaporwave footwork club in an abandoned Soviet sub pen in Siberia. Where are these clubs for young professionals that play cheesy/distant/cheap 4/4 kick loops for hours. beebee880: Marketing pigs in a blanket "I am watching The Fall. So far, Gilly is very sleepy." Holy. ihaveswineflu Stay Woke. ihaveswineflu: I'm awake. Amazing null_shithead try charging for it. That's how we stay rot in the Great U.S.A. null_shithead my job is to look good and ponder the world of sales. I'm about to do some manual labor. adrianfer15 you son of a bitch. """Olympics of suffering right here. Slavery versus the holocaust."" Perhaps The Office does have something to offer me." *heavy breathing* 9AM Monday; Turnt. What an amazing Tweet. a_nice_frog !!!!! CarWaffle: Custom one-off 840hp Ferrari Enzo ZXX deemed to loud to race VergeScience: The ashes of the person who discovered Pluto will reach the dwarf planet this Tuesday … Jesus Droid JeremyClarkson: Thankyou Spanish man. AussieGrit: JeremyClarkson none. Your missing the weapon matey... zbindendesign: All good things... "JeremyClarkson the Liana, if you're feeling sentimental." JeremyClarkson: Right. About to do my last ever lap of the Top Gear test track. What car should I use? rollsroycecars: Presenting the bespoke Ghost Chengdu Panda. Inspiration is everywhere: logan_smith78 I'm afraid we've all died. "Lord of the Rings-inspired ""Hobbit House"" Destroyed By Decent People" Gilly please stop swimming. "I respect your image of yourself as ""strange/quirky/gamer/lolsoweird"" but it is vile and objectively wrong. I want to die." "You know when people spell the word ""the"" as ""teh."" It is a splendid litmus test for who to avoid." Fuck this life. post-modernism. ": As a nice musician, it's only a matter of time before I perform with a band called The Coffee Sharts" Photo: topmiata: ff_matt_moore v8swap v8miata | TopMiata mazda miata mx5 eunos roadster Angry... Babe. I am the devil. Sliding past your DMs into eternity. sweating like an angel "Lowpolybot: ClipArtBot Your picture is ready: iso gradient noedges colorize " Sam Hyde's son made some music. I kinda want a Fiesta ST. Insane_Cultist: I forgot about this. but I did anyway. I don't want to look for it. SLAY "normally, I share your attitude. The difference here is that Ms. Avery herself is the composer AND the model." Wow. "blank_was_blank: Her biennium was naturalistic, like twenty-mile copolymers" The RC-F isn't supposed to look this good. AbdominalAl this is not a joke. I've helped a lot of people. I've saved a lot of marriages. PersonTheHumann I'm fairly sure my soul mate just got hired by Toyota advertising and is wreaking some serious havoc. koruemporium not a ritual. A more modern human invention. Though still nearly 50 years old. AbdominalAl hmu anytime. Skype is DepravedInfant. I charge $25-40/hour depending on what you need. Accept PayPal or SnapCash. David Blue 0kbps I've been here since before the Big Bang. Help me. a_nice_frog: love2drive54 0kbps I made this joke first. Toyota has officially lost it. KOPNTechRadio: Clever Toyota ad hijacks Siri to switch off iPhones while driving: kopntechradio 0kbps: my dad is 49 years old ETHAN. I have actually disgusted myself. how are you already a mom. Photoset: The night. a_nice_frog: I forgot I sent this to my mom on Mother's Day It is currently Hot Ass Fuck. a_nice_frog: when the weed man throw in a little yeah yeah you get it Wednesday best day of year you're going to Drywall heaven on the Drywall holiday. Just filmed a room/workplace tour. It'll be uploaded soon! "emeek77: Save a tree, Write a blog." "Passed 10,000 views on today! Thank you so much everyone!" iMovie for iPhone 4 video: "Just went back and looked at some of my really early YT videos. Shouldn't have done that, now I'm tempted to delete all of them." Was looking through my Applecare agreement and came across this. Even their legal guys have a sense of humor. lol iPhone 4 Unboxing This is how iOS was supposed to be viewed all along. What the text looks like for the NYTimes. This display is AMAZING!! "Got my iPhone 4! Lots of videos coming soon, including my weird, nostalgic unboxing!" The line in front of AT&T. We're an hour early and the line is still at least 35 long.... "Macintoshtipz: evo and iPhone battles get hilarious " Gettin up at 4:30 tomorrow to get my iPhone 4! I've got 90 minutes of video to work with from the Salute to Veterans airshow. Going to be over 12 GB and I have 7GB of HD space left...... "Handled an HTC EVO 4G for the first time today. Best Android device I've seen, but still not anywhere close to the quality of the iPhone." Look at that little beast! That was where it all started... Dr Lutzer is speaking at our church today. Wow! Jon4Lakers: I told my fiancé I wanted to 'FaceTime' with her. She thought it was a dirty proposition. Day 8 is up! BAP Day 8 is on it's way "mzeroa Missouri might be too long a trip for you guys this time! Next time you're in the area, check out at KJEF." "mzeroa, Hey Jason, if you get hungry on your trip just come on up to KJEF in Missouri. We've got free fried chicken!" "Believe it or not, old pilots are some of the coolest people on the planet." Free fried chicken at the airport. Mmmmmmmm Yay. Yay. "I have no ""love life."" My love IS my life." "Really hate the term ""Love Life."" It makes it sound like love is something you save for weekends." JMan_Rife: Cute! I'll have to get ZOU and then we can freak some people out """Good morning Iowa"" ""You're in Iowa?"" ""Always.""" "JMan_Rife Thnx bro. They only accepted me because I tattooed ""M I Z"" on my dick. I whip it out at games." Mmmhmm Insisting you are the same as someone else is as wrong and offensive as insisting you are better than them. Movie idea: schizophrenic crust punk named Briefcase that thinks he's a superhero. The Bible's lessons can be very insightful sometimes. It makes you wonder if it was written as a soof life manual told in fiction. The long-anticipated beginning to my career in film. The Pills Have Eyes IX MoeRawi It's kinda hard to describe but it's basically in the building to the right when you're facing the West entrance. "MoeRawi I don't for sure, but I would guess the gym. Sorry I'm not more help, but I know absolutely nothing about Hickman athletics." Watching this in study hall instead of doing Statistics homework. myflightcoach: Death is just nature's way of telling you to watch your airspeed.— Anon. "I live in a one room apartment With windows on one side I stare through the glass cross the water To where the big, ugly city lies" Can't say I ever thought I'd be booty popping to Johnny Cash. I don't think I'll ever be able to own a vehicle that has mandatory constant traction control. I have SO MUCH to get done tonight. So I'm doing the mature thing and going out with my siblings to dance to 80s music. "That was a joke, by the way." I read Road & Track and I don't have sex with prostitutes. What a paradox. Vintage car magazines by the fireplace. heaven I kinda miss when pop lyrics were ridiculously sappy rather than ridiculously trashy. pissboot YOU'VE MADE THIS JOKE BEFORE. orgamecha I don't think he is on Twitter anymore but he's launching a website soon. "I haven't known Future long, but it sounds like his life is just an apathetic blur of wealth." PersonTheHumann ok I haven't seen the video though so I'm going to watch it when I get home. greatartbot: PersonTheHumann Future kept me going for 4 shifts without sleep it was astonishing. PersonTheHumann I pre-ordered the new album so I've listened to this 3 times today. [laughing-crying emoji] " you are many things, but you will never be a goth." How do you acquire this much cute. Watch luminescence is cute As Fuck. My gorgeous wife and our rugged baby boy. What a beautiful family. :) My hair broke the headband. OH MY GOD. PersonTheHumann is the automatic tolerable? "a_nice_frog truly, a work of art." AbdominalAl I do. PersonTheHumann I couldn't have said it better. "AbdominalAl I can, but she'll have to want it." orgamecha my brother's name is Daniel and he is nearly as divine a social media being as I am. The FOOT SHAPED accelerator pedals are one of those things that make me want to boil myself. I started listening to standards and THANK GOD my friends saved me from the void. I used to take a ton of Adderall XR in high school and listen to this album. John Zorn is good. That moment when the neighborhood sandwraith gets cocky and raids your supply of Zest Runes. (Vine by swagnug) PersonTheHumann that entire outfit is unbelievable. A WHITE WRAITH JESUS CHRIST Now I've gotta buy Pluto God Damn. PersonTheHumann SLAB track if I ever done heard one. Is there a better Vine? "koruemporium dude have you ever listened to an episode? Edgy white dudes is pretty much the demographic, I think." koruemporium all you need is a microphone. I don't have the capability or the intention of making it a true vodcast anyway. koruemporium this is the soof thing we should discuss in a more appropriate media. (Drycast) "koruemporium what an amazing quote. Ultimately, the school of psychology is humanity's attempt to quantify its variety." koruemporium and what I see is all that's relevant to me. I do love to talk about it though. "koruemporium I personally ceased wondering about these sorts of things long ago because I realized that I trust my senses," koruemporium damnit. "koruemporium (I don't actually discount this soof thing, btw. My blunt responses are just because it's entertaining.)" "koruemporium quite a fascinating theory. Technically, all that's known about psychosis is that it's basically just extra brain function." pissboot I am the opposite of insurance. "koruemporium yes, I would imagine so." I don't remember creating this Tweet. syrupf can we do it in the winter? The back of such a truck can be very uncomfortable in warm temperatures. syrupf: the syrupf challenge: fight me in the back of a u-haul truck going 100 mph frasierfir monstergirls you are all incorrect. "If I had a 2014 top-of-the-line 6-Series, would I ever be seen at Big Lots?" David Blue Incredible. freakmommy: AT THE STATE CAPITAL An old (but clean-ass) 7-Series with Iowa plates just pulled up. beebee880: Me me I'm crying real tears at work. When fashion takes influence from military operation. My shoes match the sky. ICED. 0kbps: salvage af ?????????? TheOnion: “I will drain the world.” "NickKellyLNHS: ""That's how most stuff gets written: cocaine and marijuana""--Ray Murray mujw" "EDM ""Stoked.""" METRICS Metrics bitch. I want to go to Goodwood. """I've owned at least 120 Cadillacs."" " PersonTheHumann NO. NOOOOWOOoo koruemporium no. NO. Somebody please call me A Shunt. """Do you think I'm going to mesh well with college culture?"" ""No.""" syrupf I CANNOT FAIL. I still cannot believe this happened. I can't believe I let this happen. Can you believe that shunt is a word. Like...thank you so much for shunt. A Big Sex. 0kbps a Daily Jake video updating us all with what's happening on the net would be financially viable. 0kbps JAKE: LIVE UPDATE I think I may have forgotten to mention that I caused a global fiscal disaster yesterday. "Like Kidz Bop, but it's Apathy Bop. I just realized this already exists; it's called Indie." "guccibraidz anytime, Ms. Nugget." "guccibraidz alternatively, you have a large enough fanbase that you could probably get results by mobilizing them to flag." "guccibraidz if you think it's worth your time, try this. " guccibraidz you can contest it with Google. You'd probably get results but nobody's making ad revenue off of 6-second videos anyway. guccibraidz how can this be? How are you doing this? you know I'm after that FUCKING TITLE in your description. Stay Woke. have you replied with your URL yet? Do not touch the Shit Shunt. Every podcast requires a bitter Welsh man. His Welsh cynicism will keep us in check! Remembering grandpa :((((( (Vine by swagnug) akiba_k3i it seems I'd lose the Windows Classic theme and that Just Won't Do. Is upgrading from Windows 7 to Windows 10 going to gain me anything? syrupf then you must call it the Sweaty Boy Challenge. "Me, the man. " Me when the man has arrived. David Blue I am a wheezing man. 0kbps we love you too. "A young man just took a picture of me sitting in my car in the parking lot. Hello, young man." I am about to eat. : Planned or unplanned? 0kbps that means I'm doing things correctly. "famicomprincess well I mean...actually hearing them say ""goodbye"" for the last time. Didn't really have a choice." "famicomprincess it's ok, I was already crying." famicomprincess you're going to make me cry. I can't believe Top Gear is gone. """What's your seat upholstery made from?"" ""Wetsuits.""" Turboactive Oh dear. """I didn't enjoy my near-death experience.""" ammnontet syrupf "ihaveswineflu: save money on bedding ,, fall asleep on a person" """A classic car is like a pet dog; one day, it's going to let you down and die.""" lost 4 words I SHOULDN'T HAVE FOLLOWED ALL THOSE FRENCH CYCLING ACCOUNTS JODYHiGHROLLER: CODEiNE SUNSETS 0kbps: C Y B E R B I B L E "we love GOD we love GIRLS" 0kbps ah. 0kbps I'm not sure I understood that tweet. Help. """I'm trying to hack, but this machine seems to be dysfunctional. It will only display this man.""" syrupf let me compose the manifesto. gifs bore the living shit out of me why are you all so fascinated "Help, Nob." GrowingUpUgly read lots of 3the NOB Goldblum_Facts: Jeff Goldblum thought today was Friday :( "Wow, Nob." "Shucknob, Billy. What ag good play" Nude Scat Shunt "Wild Shooshkoob, the best author." "Will shackenglabe, my favorite writing." "Will, shakin." "hello, man. " Me. "Me, manning. " BBCR1: Hey joelycett thanks for coming in to visit us. Nice photo ---> str8boytexts: str8boytexts: " it's ok, James. You'll pass into the next plane with a full tummy." I'm craving a fatal car accident. Snapchat is so good. I rescind everything. they say you need to do that. Dodge: We see you staring. We encourage it. Challenger DescribeBabiesIn3Words fucking financial suicide DescribeBabiesIn3Words What the fuck cool nice (Vine by muscle_god) women's magazines (( ChelseaVPeretti )) (Vine by ihaveswineflu) OH MY a_quilt_bot: imgshredder HeadlineSmasher: Skeleton Found in People's Bodies. Unreal. Iowa_update: Wow. A cow. Iowa_update: Maybe if I lower my standards I'll find something to eat in the cupboards wordnuvola wordcloud This is the end. Cool media mom. Ass death / street shunt. Crying Raven / school nob Data goth. Dad heaven. Windows video human. Cute suffering. Pain truck. adrianfer15 no. NO. GET THAT THING AWAY FROM ME. adrianfer15 David Blue Ambisagrus: outside magazine asking the hard hitting questions MAN FUCK SHIT BIG WEE ManBunNation NO. NO. WHY ARE YOU TALKING TO ME. wordnuvola: AsphaltApostle here's your word cloud! Videograte YouTube player -> ": Ive decided to name my first child ""Most""." nickdemarco: when TheOnion breaks the news first I have witnessed a man-bun man complain about Jimmy Johns and mayonnaise for 20 straight minutes. Mike & His Spoon MIKE str8boytexts: str8boytexts: CyberEveryword: ????????? OurEdisons plan for 9PM CST> adrianfer15 0kbps: go to bed it's time for american tweets "The new hit TV Comedy, The Oracle." Zcon is a thing? Oh boy. syrupf: who designed this PersonTheHumann ok. """I'll buy a neighbor's house if they complain about the noise."" holy shit" Mike Romney I JUST FUCKED YOUR BITCH IN SOME GUCCI FLIP FLOPS "Yes, I just got my DS2 pre-order. No, I do not have enough money to eat." Flyin18T: (453) Drycast tonight. Time open. dysrexia syrupf RapGameShinji OurEdisons a_nice_frog ryandeel Edgar Allan Poo I think pain truck is still my favorite. White fucking. Coffee help bitch. Drycast is taking a Future break but we'll be back 2 minutes after the hour :) "CrazyLeoNet: RIP 3 August 1989 - 18 July 2015 forzajules julesbianchi " Drycast is live RIGHT NOW. Man Bun? ???????? I've let the world down. I am so sorry. David Blue Drycast is goin live in two hours! Coach's Pre-Game Leather Congratulation Congregate engadget: Cute Nao robot exhibits a moment of self-awareness "I'm back in black, on the stairway to the town, with the boys, by the fat girls, under the light, singing for my mother." : Girl lemme quiche HUDDLE HELL MIX Coach's Pre-Game Huddle Hell LILBTHEBASEDGOD: this if you ARE A GIRL and have shitted on YOURSELF - Lil B Coach's Pre-Game Classic Rock Anthem Hell CD girl let me smulsh girl let me smosh girl let me smiche girl let me smesh girl let me smush thewaybot: I like it when it rains like a lot and I wanna sleep. 1 Submarine vs. entire Japanese Navy. ihadtopee: r.i.p. uss wednesday we wil mis u 4ever GhettoGeek ReTweet DAAAYTONAAAAAAAA "Two significant events of 2011: -iOS gained customizable text tones -I fell in love." GhettoGeek This. A caring relationship. "Because I only absorb the opinions of my friends rather than develop my own, I'm listening to Johnny Hobo and the Freight Trains." Ha Hey_ItsSunshine: I'm gonna board you like a plane boy. "spankydoodle: buenothebear Hey Pen, I made your video game: " Now NCIS is a franchise they could make an MMO after. "The Facebook Messenger application..... So much shitty, unnecessary information. So of course I keep it on my desktop constantly." PHatHumanoid It'll continue until all language is just unintelligible grunting. One of my girlfriend's neighbors owns a Juke. Another one owns an Aztec. Both are in view of one another. Why. God. There are so many obvious violations of the Law of Conservation of Matter in Sonic wtf PersonTheHumann SANIC NOW ON APP STORE YAY It's currently 8AM. SANIC OH MY GOD "ACT in a week, finals in two... No I cannot take on your project." MrChuckD: This Day in HipHop - Dec 1st: Jurassic 5 release their Self-Entitled debut DJNuMark Chali2na... There was a man leading a horse through the middle of downtown at 4:30AM. FUCKETHEFUCKETHEFUCK "WarmCigarette afraid I've made this joke already, my friend." akiba_k3i: what a kawaii morning akiba_k3i lookin' good. """As you mature as a writer, you'll find yourself replacing profanity with eloquence."" ""Fuck that.""" The End. HOLY I JUST MADE A SEXUAL PUN Drycast eeehhhh thewaybot: I like it when boys have messy hair! GOOD GOD IN HEAVEN Seinfeld2000: what if seinfeld was marvel watching LIVE on Periscope: H we're still goin. "Will, shakin'." ammnontet I GOT HERE FIRST YOU FUCK ammnontet send him to please Thank you. "AutoGuide: The Tesla Model S now has ""Ludicrous Mode"" " I DON'T SEE orgamecha Imagine if you could pin someone else's Tweet. THIS IS THE BEST TWEET OF ALL TIME bodybuildinga7: Eat bodybuildinga7: ? We feel nothing. bodybuildinga7: Butt Toning Workout: bodybuildinga7: -- Run faster. bodybuildinga7: ? Sweaty? bodybuildinga7: ? Awake bodybuildinga7: ? I WILL NOT BE STOPPED. Z-Ro is going to physically suffocate your software. "I can't believe I managed to miss ""Put your Pro Tools in a chokehold"" all these years." syrupf akiba_k3i dear oh dear. Suppose it's easier to fudge than a Turbo. Hyper mileing is the next punk thing. akiba_k3i does it get any better than a 996 GT3? akiba_k3i one could swear this photograph was taken in 2004. akiba_k3i: hard-wired """Those yellow fuckers.""" Only on Drycast. 0kbps I loved you before but now I'm actually IN love with you. Little Italian bundle of joyous quirk. Sentreh this one's gonna take me awhile. Run the Jowls 0kbps is that paof the story or? 0kbps: it's beautiful Space Jeep: No Survivors 0kbps: we space now syrupf I feel like this is probably bad. Data Dad. conner_omalley: The best food in Italy is at McDonald's I was wrong about reggae. "This cut is called ""The Untrustworthy."" " David Blue Give me that old time religion. Cut for aesthetics. I feel like I may have done this before but I don't remember when. "PersonTheHumann not without re-editing the episode, which cannot be done today." The Old and The New; The worst parts of ourselves duel it out on this friend-filled episode of Drycast. (Vine by zaynicotine) true (Vine by ariafrs) "ihaveswineflu: u said ""Netflix and chill"" not ""pray with my family""" I'm going to take a demolition derby car to Goodwood and introduce myself as President Bill Clinton. DAVID CHURCH " would only cost ya $39 a year, folks." "koruemporium I'm not actually worried about it, to be honest. The entire thing is extremely entertaining regardless of its validity." "koruemporium well that makes it all a little less bewildering, thank you." so that I may enter the obnoxiously pretentious car discussion that will continue for the rest of my days. "Auto journalists are my people, and I spend every waking moment striving to unite with them." "Begin your Supermini Shootout with a thorough brush-up on The Orb, The Oval, and Urgency." "I thought Devon Sweeney was an ironic account for like a year, and I still grapple with the issue every day." Isn't there a town in the U.S. called Flushing? "Forever, flushing." I'm ready to retire. you can ask me when you're 18. ihaveswineflu incredible. go to sleep. I tried to be green and sustainable but I'm just going to kill them all. "There are daddy long legs in every corner of my house. I have politely asked them to leave, but they are being difficult." "Sentreh unless you're expecting a Pretty Big Pop in the near future, the nature of time remains constant." en_jajaja: I just ate tacos in the shower what's happening to my life it's falling apaFeelBetterJustin "Sentreh doesn't work that way, I'm afraid." """To have a really good time and then pass it along.""" """Spend an hour in church and where are you? Spend an hour in a car and you're at the beach.""" Here comes Mad Media Man. Whoever created the .gripe extension is a fucking hero. This one's just got to be bought. HOLY SHIT "koruemporium this is what I was doing in high school, and I'm guessing I was quite difficult to label. " I am constantly afraid of cultural insensitivity. I am currently quaking. Always quaking in my big red shoes. koruemporium I've gotta polish my cultural leaping skills somewhere. koruemporium I Tweeted that as if I'd actually watched MTV ever. koruemporium see: MTV in the 1980s. koruemporium ah. You'll never have to worry about that. "I explained because I thought it'd be funny, but it turns out cultural ignorance is still just ignorant." I'm a dang biliningeuinst now. "Man: ""House."" Me: ""Casa."" Man: ""House."" Me: ""Casa."" *man nods, but does not laugh*" "Yesterday, I actually explained to a Spanish-speaking immigrant that the only Spanish word I know is ""casa.""" El Chumpo AndrewJames1983: harrym_evo octane_magazine my little boy loves your XJS - been looking at it for ages! The first wearable was extremely function-limited and made of bone. "And by that, I mean we're out of milk and I'd rather not go out." "Milk Man, it's time." evoAntony MR_AndrewBrady would they even let him in the car park? MR_AndrewBrady: What car would Audi powertrain chief Thomas Heiduk like to own? A TVR V8 S! A thinking man's Tweet. koruemporium I only cut for the aesthetic. koruemporium thalordjosaye: you son of a bith "Would Denise McCluggage have enjoyed such success and affection if she'd been male, I wonder?" akiba_k3i it's because we've been drained and we're seeking a youthful host. SlappedEyes: Hugh as fuck Denzel Thump Doneld Tremp "koruemporium no, I just like to play with Big Words." realDonaldTrump MittRomney PizzaPartyBen koruemporium and I'm engaging in friendly chiding - that stuff that the folk do. The proverbial affectionate punch to the shoulder. koruemporium you've just denounced the school of psychology and positively used its terminology in the same sentence. koruemporium I'm not. koruemporium the defining traits found in any definition in greater quantities than the average individual. koruemporium it is a scale. "PorscheRetail: The Porsche695 'T7' prototype is considered the predecessor to the Porsche911 PorscheMuseum Zuffenhausen …" koruemporium one doesn't really need to prove his psychopathy to himself. "koruemporium I am a high-functioning sociopath, so you could say I am of the Mind Hyperorder." This booger is really eating my cherries. No more talk; the weapons are coming out. koruemporium not in the slightest. "koruemporium I don't explicitly know when I'm joking, either." koruemporium I put on nothing; I am air. koruemporium as if I'd partake in a substance offering 0 positive contribution to my velocity. The booger is wearing out the tracks on the kitchen drawers to irritate me. It's working. Friction is my worst enemy. "The booger is stealing all of the sodium from the Culligan machine. Two in the chest, one in the head." There's a booger in the house. I must shoot off my Big Gun. koruemporium I don't think I can tell you that. This isn't the soof language I use when analyzing my own behavior. It simply is. how ironic. """Happy birthday, Time!""" """Get over here, Time.""" "If you have a friend named Timothy, his optimal nickname is ""Time.""" This is why I am alive. koruemporium Human Variety is my only God. koruemporium what you've described resembles a character I'd draw up as entertainment in a conversation. How fascinating. koruemporium holy shit I want to meet this man. koruemporium he's probably going to get involved in petty crime and die before he's 25. koruemporium indeed. koruemporium the current literature on psychopathy is very outdated. We now know that children can't feel empathy until ~7 years old. "koruemporium I'm above bed wetting, pointless killing is a waste of energy and time, and arson is a waste of property." "koruemporium the answer to that question is quite complicated. A lot is [CLASSIFIED,] but I shall be The Soft Media Messiah, essentially." "koruemporium it'd really depend on the penultimate goal. Mine involves others, so no." "koruemporium if you REALLY wanted to reach, you could say my ""art"" is a critical representation of what disgusts me." "Bourkkonen: JeremyClarkson Hi, do you plan to come in France ?" koruemporium I am the opposite of violent because it gains me absolutely nothing. "koruemporium the high-functioning variety tend to be just cold, with occasional bursts of extreme disgust." "koruemporium very perceptive, actually. A disgust with the laymen's lack of aspiration is fairly prevalent throughout my content." "koruemporium I was entertained by the concept of the video, so I made it." koruemporium that relateable moment when the Coast Guard nearly catches you tossing Gordon Ramsay's severed head into the sea. koruemporium [CLASSIFIED] "IAM_SHAKESPEARE: Then to your offices, and let me rest." koruemporium complete self-interest is the single most peaceful mind state. "koruemporium don't worry, I don't have violent urges. Except against foodies." koruemporium my social status is non-existent. The closest thing I'll ever have is more accurately described as public image. "koruemporium ad revenue will be my only source of income, one day. Any/all of my social concern is related to this fact." "koruemporium essentially. This is why I never have an answer for you when you ask stuff like ""are you being ironic.""" "Twitter has always been astoundingly reliable, considering. Perhaps it's a bit soon to call it shit?" a buss "Servant_Adriana LordFumei a buss turned out of turn at a nearby junction, creating a torrent of honking that drowned out his reply." "Direct Messages, sliding." API clients seem to still be working. famicommunism to visit the fast food chain he managed with a ruthless hand. OpenRP When the I need my ultra high res pixelated photo please. famicommunism gaze upon God's creation. "I've just made a Gallardo owner visibly upset because I brought up ""the German thing.""" David Blue """Video gaming is a soof piano for math.""" Cornelia is a cute name. HammerFist3: Yall some snail ass mother fuckers " greet him with ""taxation is theft,"" and say nothing else." "Somebody wrote ""don't trust a bitch"" on a pack of trident layers with a sharpie, but left it on the shelf. Thank you." The Mitsubishi Evo is crafted with the best slave labor: American POWs. All the more reason to buy one TODAY. "yeah, Evo's very explicitly performance driving-focused." Jethro Glasses OH Emme Hall is too fast for radio. REVELATION: Modern sensibility is BEAUTIFUL. TacoBellKuwait EAT THE NINTENDO. "TacoBellKuwait: What’s the difference? NOTHING! Both are crazy good and fun! tacobell_kuwait " "You can take many paths in life. Apparently, one of them leads to PRE-ORDERING a Volvo XC90, and 30,000 people have taken it." "Good God. GOOD GOD. Has anyone ever watched the entire thing. ""It's the most Volvo a Volvo has ever been."" " "carloslago and to think I thought I'd live my entire life without hearing you say ""hella flush.""" This is like MotorTrend ClickHole Does Carlos Lago listen to UGK? BEFORE MAKING A UGK REFERENCE "I JUST HEARD CARLOS LAGO SAYING ""HELLA FLUSH""" Just the essentials. carloslago: Had a lot of fun making this video on the Prancer from the new Vacation movie. Drove it faster than anyone on set! … "aminorjourney: Sixty years on, and it’s still one of the best off-roaders out there. I’m not surprised production is being extended. ht…" dysrexia is this about the Twitter thing or Hitler. Malware Mom is my worst creation. "When Malware Mom left Denim Dad, he fell into a bit of an alcoholic stupor, but made a triumphant return as Data Dad." Denim Dad likes his jeans. "Do gardeners EVER have a ""good season?"" Have you ever met one that's refrained from complaining about the weather for an entire year?" Denim Dad would like to join your friends' conversation. Denim Dad would like to talk about this season's effect on his garden. YungDankenstein well done. orgamecha always glad to have your traffic. "loliliberator: /!\ WEB TWITTER IS BROKEN IF U WANNA TALK SHIT NOW IS THE TIME /!\ also if u cant see this, Youre A Dumb Bitch" Compartmentalization is the worst necessary thing in life. "Hopefully I'll be releasing a tape in the next few months. Solo (maybe) piano, story based, with abook. Only on .mp3 and cassette." "PHatHumanoid: It doesn't matter if your're a total fucking idiot. If you impress people in an interview,you can hold a job forever. ..." Kinda tired of being young and stupid and being surrounded by people that are young and stupid. You freq! Why is it that I have plenty of energy and focus NOW as opposed to when I need it most during the day? "Well shit, now I'm listening to The Donnas. Can't even use Gran Turismo 3 as an excuse anymore." "Gained more followers on ihadtopee. You people really don't like yourselves, do you?" "I agree. ChiTownAlvarez: 1147-175591-6550, 2233-298080-3424 or 3425-814615-3990" "PersonTheHumann Tell your parents that they sell Kias, therefore they can shut the fuck up until they cease doing so." The Poplar Effect Google has pretty much replaced my mother. You know the feeling when it gets cold outside where you want to lick a bunch of dusty books? Totally going through that right now.... PersonTheHumann HGTV My dream catcher. A date which will live in infamy. LYKE - “PersonTheHumann: ” JMan_Rife DORM STORM """Dear God, WHAT IT DO MAYNE?!""" Rapp Snitches Well I totally self-sabotaged tonight. Let's see what happens tomorrow night. Maybe it'll be even more entertaining. badbadnotgood kewlkars: Today I'm feeling mellow and mercky. Hope you don't mind.......Let's go cruising engadget: Drones are pestering Spain's royal family bodybuildinga7: 2 things: bodybuildinga7: - Doubt me. bodybuildinga7: Dirty ammnontet ammnontet ammnontet: AsphaltApostle Earl. ammnontet Earl. Dear oh dear. BBCBreakfast: Rhino horn camera could save rhinos from extinction - SEE GrahamSatchell repoweareprotect htt… "ammnontet uh oh! haha I'm bleeding out! haha. Earl," "ammnontet of course. Twitter is not the proper place for a full benefit analysis exchange, though. " Something very bad is happening. autonewslv: Video:aizkaitin?ts zilonis uzbr?k maš?nai: Cosworth and Morgan sittin' in a tree. Both died of old age long ago. RoadandTrack: Our Favorite Photos from the 2015 24 Hours of Le Mans craigcole this is the most terrifying image I have ever seen. craigcole: Look at all the fun you could have if you drove a Tata Nano! You could even get caught in a tornado of hipsters. … What happens if you rally an iPad? COOLED GLOVEBOX with ELECTRONIC RELEASE. Volvo and Apple are so similar it's unreal. Volvo man speaks of rage as if he's experienced it before. I took one of my regular breaks from the ALL-ENTRAPPING NOISE of media and gotten bitten by tons of my tiny neighbors. lihanEAD looks very expensive. """It'll be exactly the same, except with TOO MANY DRONES.""" "Those folk in the past dreaming about 2015 could have never imagined the lack of significant change, except for THE DRONE SWARMS." you're a man now; it's time to break all the doors and your body. : *slams my head through a door* im ready to go to work "FrontSeatPhil: Don't mess with a winning formula, they say. Fiat listened. I drive the 'new' Fiat 500: …" ihaveswineflu: SHOW ME THE WHALES ihaveswineflu hurl a subtweet at my face. Wow! (Vine by GabrielDreyfuss) DeadDigitizer: ladies.... "julkinen: ""Future Classics"" from Classic Car magazine, June 1998. The same cars are still future classics, 17 years later... …" Rhythmic Speednoise NYMag: What happens when EMTs encounter dying patients — and their families: The Journal of Pain and Symptom Management 0kbps: haha is that vaperwave "ammnontet also, thank you." ammnontet I know nobody wants to hear this but what I've heard so far is close to what I've always wanted to do but I'm bad with DAWs. ammnontet could we use your music for intro/extro on Drycast? God Darn "orgamecha next time, promote " "I have never blocked anyone, anywhere." AsphaltApostle good effort. I Fucked Up Some Commas I wish I could've been a real youth. Is there a limit to how much you can wash your hands? "And if they are, is there...straw or something? To soak up the disease?" "On that note, are youth hostels real?" I think it is because I do not travel like they do. "Looking at the daily thoughts of net celebrity youths makes me feel old, weary, and dull. I'm sorry if I've let you down." rejectedapclass: AP Subtweet Analysis goldfishbabe101: driving in heels is an aform goldfishbabe101: A small boy from the 90s brushing his teeth goldfishbabe101: one time my mom made me a Hershey's kiss Halloween costume conner_omalley: While you are watching game of thrones I am reading the bible and God is watching me and smiling at me TheThirdPew: After RachelDolezal's interview I have also decided to explain my own transracial life TheOnion: North American Children Begin Summer Migration To Dad’s goldfishbabe101: *walks on the other side of the mall just to avoid the teavana people* goldfishbabe101: sext: I will come over and scratch your bug bites "LucybelleH: Mum, that's not a picture of Jesus " I've just received an urgent email. autocar: Blog from hiltonholloway - Why Mini is pushing upmarket Tato1979: MartiniMonday CivicSi1992 lcbernalo LeahRebeccaUK PrestigeDiesels BCJr DP_Grouch Leotrek2 ilovelancia … (New Me does not use offensive language toward insects.) A U D I F U T U R E The charming David Blue. "I was just in ""the sticks"" but I didn't touch any of them." I fall deeper and deeper in love with every Swag Nugget snap story. : GrowingUpAFetus AUDI DAD AsphaltApostle Photo: I need some cocaine. koruemporium FADE OUT Slavik woman yelling a lot. Weathered radiation warning symbols. The narrative is not complicated. Clicking gang. bodybuildinga7: ? Sore? COCKED PISTOL Global Thermonuclear War I made money from the Iraq War. ReillyHoeft: Taco Bell: Because you've got nothing else to live for David Blue Teach me to act like the Danger Boy. Teach me how to grow curly hair. Zest Boy. I'm going to staa gofundme; you can pay me in zest. I think I'm getting the hang of it. FAST & LOOSE. I DON'T KNOW. I HAVE NEVER PAID FOR BUTT. sorry. stuartg917: Drove McLaren's 675LT last week. Makes a GT2 RS feel a bit lethargic. " $200,000" THIS BITCH BROUGHT HIS GEORGE FOREMAN TO CLASS. koruemporium oh noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo " you bear your burden well, James Wilson." : Ive invented a dimension-hopping device so i can go to every possible universe & prevent lil bub from being born in all… koruemporium BOING BOING. koruemporium I'm a butt burger. Cyber_Dad: help you've already mastered the Midwestern lifestyle. "blank_was_blank: His bisque was sudanese, like a fluorescent second-place" businessinsider: 50 Cent testifies his lifestyle is an illusion: 'I take jewelry and cars back to stores' http:/… ammnontet: me Ruth Negga isn't real. orgamecha I am a gun. Bang bang. " time to dump the suit for some khaki shorts and take a tropical vacation to ""recharge."" Sustainable" GregMacLeman: Love SaintMotel's My Type EP cover. 1960 Cadillac Eldorado? SusumuYogusorry. ????????????? HOW CALLING ALL CORNELIAS moshashes HOLY FUCK. "moshashes: AsphaltApostle ever since you said you liked the name Cornelia, all I can think about is ""Cornelia Blue-"" it'd be the best …" ask me when you're 18. I CANNOT ENTER BUILDINGS ANYMORE I HAVE BECOME TOO BIG I'm too big. "iowa_redneck: ""Where are you from?"" Really? My name is literally IOWA Redneck. ??" I'm mad. " I could too, you oaf." David Blue koruemporium Ashton Kutcher doesn't look happy at all! koruemporium please. gridlock.exe jaketapper lethal force. The world is ending. NYMag: So hot-noodle vending machines are now things that exist: Barrett_Jackson chevrolet bodybuildinga7: ?Single I need a link that will play all 500+ of my videos at once. "harrismonkey: In some respects the McLarenAuto 675LT answers the question, 'what would a P1 have been like without all the electric st…" koruemporium : : is that your mom. """You are not sustainable today.""" famicommunism BOP carscribe too much quirk. carscribe: ... And all that Jazz! Alex Jones is the fastest man on the planet. This took more contemplation than any Tweet I've ever posted. e I want to direct a cinematic orchestra but I would be turnt af on the job. HammerFist3 thanks. Wax on my water bottle. AbdominalAl oh dear. What the grunge. pissboot you rang? koruemporium yeticheese I'm a twink bull. Gallardoville Can't come to the wedding I'm appropriating rn This is ok. syrupf sorry I am so sorry. beebee880: Watching Falmy feud I'm getting too big. """...you are really moving…as if in a beautiful, expensive dream.""" I am eating a Food. "NYDailyNews: A gunman opened fire when no one wanted to sing ""Happy Birthday"" to his girlfriend. …" Ummmmm BlSCUlTS Hard Ragtimeviolence BlSCUlTS sustaining the life of paltry word combinations is my life's work. Guilt Grunge syrupf VENERATE THE BOAT. "It is not youthful to describe oneself as ""scrappy"" in 2015." Oh dear. "25 spiders on my dresser, yessir" thyniggy: I stay strapped in case a nigga try to run up More bad Christian disasters can be found on my blog: a_nice_frog: akiba_k3i: ?????????????? colesprouse: Am I 'hip' yet? David Blue CURRENT STATUS: Not sustainable. "You know that song where that man yells ""sail!"" What if it was ""flail!""" "Hello, my name is Jorts Hassle." Cyber Ned He Oprah: He Ultra-Agony Gospel "GenreGenerator: all my friends love commercial writhing gospel" RapGameShinji I will only hold hands with strangers if they wash them in front of me first. Burger King Wed us. Burger King buried us. orgamecha: the antichrist shall come donning google glass bodybuildinga7: ? Doubt me. bodybuildinga7: 1) God orgamecha EIVth: LILBTHEBASEDGOD web come out they ass tho LILBTHEBASEDGOD Spiders don't have Twitter. JeremyClarkson: A dog is flying our plane CyberEveryword: ?????????? "koruemporium true, but I do know I'll never perceive it if it does, and that is as good as certainty." koruemporium the universe is indifferent. koruemporium it has none. koruemporium that would require a standard to measure myself by. koruemporium that was a joke - I don't poop. koruemporium actually quite a lot of me is shit rn I haven't gone in awhile. Download Dad where is the rhubarb. Upload the rhubarb pic right now. I forgot to ask permission to upload this pic and the subject is a Big Wig Attorney. Life on the edge takes its toll. Incredible. Opiates vs. Astrology orgamecha I am Jorts Hassle. bodybuildinga7: ? Awake bodybuildinga7: ? Baseball piersmorgan: I’m deeply offended by absolutely everything. "Yes, let us be very clever young people and stagiving ourselves random alphanumeric designations." "I am a noodeast, rest assured." "I am a nudiest, you must believe me." Kiss tutorial: "One day, I want to be a Big Man with lots of Facebook likes, but I just got my butt wet." This is no fun at all. I got my butt wet. GhettoGeek You're not retarded. As are retarded. Freakin' tight. “Hey_ItsSunshine: My little curl ” "You could get the money You could get the power But keep your eyes on the final hour" WTB lolicore tapes. "PHatHumanoid: ???? As good as music gets. Working on my vinyl rip of Music Machine. K. “PHatHumanoid: Drywall idea: Make sonnets about Margaret Thatcher and the SuperCars of that era” occupymybutt PHatHumanoid It also happens to be an amazing opportunity considering what some children (don't) have available to them. I should really care more about school than I do. They probably have something to do with the fact that I patched the secondary terminal with a piece of PS2 power cable a year ago. Had some weird electrical glitches in my truck on the way home. Facebook is making us miserable. Then they released a record of the performance and it was Time Magazine album of the year. Good lord. "Keith Jarrett hadn't slept for two days, the right piano couldn't be found, but he told the sound engineers to stay." JMan_Rife: PersonTheHumann numberonefanswag First time hearing The RP EP. I almost cried. Well. Done. JMan_Rife PHatHumanoid: I love your face "fucktyler: Dear Producers, I Make My Own Music, Stop Telling Me You Have Beats For Me And Trying To 'Network' When You See Me, We Ar ..." "Ok, so I should've said that it's two full tracks from the VERY far off Hen-ry the Astronaut tape, not a ""preview.""" "Ok, so it's 2 full tracks in one. I should've said preview of the VERY far off Hen-ry the Astronaut tape." "Here tis a preview of the first ever recorded Free Hugs track. I can't get the mix right, but you're welcome internet. " I vaguely remember being aware of the first minion movie but thought nothing of it. How did things get this bad. Fluff fucker. thefrickhead: come with me fluff fucker "ryandeel proud & happy for you, Mr. Dell." TW: Variety. I can make this joke because these are the accounts I reblog all the time. My Tumblr title is RVSVXJEJA and I only post pictures of white minimalist furniture. "Everyone I know who's bought a sport/luxury sedan in matte finish begins the conversation about their car with ""DON'T GET MATTE FINISH.""" I have lots of stuff to say on this subject but it would probably bore you to tears. " I am so proud of you, my daughter." syrupf Mountain Dew. "If I remember correctly, gross misuse of the word ""whom"" was one of the original internet jokes." Whom there. "Someone was blasting ""Take Me to Church"" from a Honda Goldwing on their way to Subway." I'm wondering if this is some soof Fabrics & Crafts/NASCAR hybrid event. There is mysterious stock car-sounding revving coming from behind Jo-Ann's along with female screams of terror. "ihaveswineflu: ""How is the beer"" It is ... BEERABLE lmao ""Jesus christ""" VocalHeaven David Blue just remind them that they haven't been on the cover of Vanity Fair. A Murano CrossCabriolet cut him off. This is the end of the line. "Maroon Maserati Man is here, and I wish I had the power to release him and his machine to a more beautiful location." koruemporium it's actually quite destructive in an evolutionary sense. koruemporium ah. ADVISORY: "BentleyComms: Final prep in the Bentley garage, ready for Super Pole in 15 mins. Live coverage here: …" !!!!! Call of Dignity : The most pitiful death would be to get rammed by a keebler elf shipping truck "Whirblewind ah. Then yes, definitely." Whirblewind was this a successful film? Nobody wants to roleplay with me. I guess actually effective solutions on an individual basis aren't what people really want though. Sorry for wasting your time. "Simpleton violence exists within a fairly rigid paradigm. If an overwhelming force is attacking you, stashitting on them." "Whirblewind and on the same note, you can effectively break up a bar brawl very quickly if you stabiting." "0kbps Dad, downloading." "Whirblewind oh there'd be no panel, just me. Threat of lethal force is a solution to more problems than you'd think, though." I think I should give anti-bullying seminars. "If this doesn't work, hold up a copy of the school directory and say ""I have your address. I have a gun. I'm going to kill your family.""" This is not a joke; it's a legitimate anti-bullying tactic. I was a scrawny kid in public school but I never got bullied because I convinced everyone I was an imminent school shooting early on. "I need a fresh audience. Hit Me Up, zesty foodists." "I want a group of picketers on the side of the road holdings signs that say ""DAVID BLUE DOOMS NATIONS.""" What would it take for the WBC to personally target me? Talk about media exposure. OwenTheNorris: AsphaltApostle for the PT cruiser too? "Drycast is going LIVE in 12 hours! This week: slave labor, autism, EMTs, the McLaren 675LT, and much more! " "OwenTheNorris on behalf of my country, I sincerely apologize." AutoPap: What a crappy miserable day....autopap I wish I would've gone to Oshkosh when I had the chance. "photoJDL: OSH15 in ten photos, for Flightglobal Airventure AirbusInTheUS " "inclushe a wee bit. A wee. Bit. Wee, A. Bit." inclushe: blizzard entertainment has hired the entire population of ireland as voice actors That was a cool tech youth retweet. "motherboard: Watch some guy play ""Half-Life"" on a smartwatch: " yeah I just went for the most gun possible. ponycargirl: The D. latergram I can smell winter rn. I had never seen a mech before and my friend launched me in at like 14. The results were ridiculous. GOD DAMN. My god. have you heard of Chromehounds? Thrilling. CARandDRIVER: 2016 Honda Accord coupe and sedan officially unveiled! FULL DETAILS: Wow! Finally! "NYMag: Yes, white people, it's about you: " "poem_exe: poems are they spreading in pouring rain!" Drycast NOTICE: Drywall TS server temporarily down. Using Skype this go around: depravedinfant Voted Most Likely to Own Neon-Textured Sports Equipment Self-harm pig. I just waxed my head. "duckiemonster: “Excuse me, do you have a minute to discuss our Goddess Athena?"" " ammnontet: time to pop in some programmer tunes for programmers Nice. Sentreh don't apologize - you've done well. "Drycast is going LIVE in 4 hours! This week: Airventure, Drones, The New Fast Honda, bullying, and much more! " Performance Today is probably my favorite paof my job. Is that pitiful? Helloareyouthe2: Thank you but I do not want an account. "OwenTheNorris on a serious note, I'm concerned as to how we let such a tragedy of a product escape. Was the SSR sold in the UK?" David Blue akiba_k3i Live Hugely I'm laughing along with corny NPR jokes and some of you still don't believe my soul is ancient. I do everything...WITH BIG. Can you believe that hugely is a legit adverb like just...think about that. Just...hugely irresponsible. I am so ashamed a FUCKING RED HHR was allowed to escape. OwenTheNorris ...yes. I will bear the blame. pantsahoy a bit more digestible. pantsahoy: AsphaltApostle um no pantsahoy Hymnnoise classics. A lesson in tasteful clipping. ~1:10...............WHAT CHRIST I forgot how good we got at making completely unpleasant noises. I was beaten in my own genre. koruemporium koruemporium [AIR] is the latest one I've heard but I'm going through them now. koruemporium here's your anthem. "koruemporium dude I've heard like all of your music. If you only listen to one, listen to PaIII." "koruemporium if this is what my music brings to mind, I have successfully performed my function." "Listen, if only to hear how unique my upright sounds. " """I'm going to kiss my father on the mouth."" " lilyallen: Paris hilton stole my blackberry. "MinecraftSigns: The stone hoe         of burning justice" Drycast is takin a vaporwave break with Friendzone! We'll be back at 26 minutes after the hour. "Panettiere defended aboriginal whaling," ammnontet my heels are clicking. Drycast pre-show music provided by ammnontet "Drycast is LIVE with a new lot, but I am behind. Come with the patience of the stones. " heaven. this is very good. " WHAT I KNOW ALL THOSE NAMES. Also, the podcast was a mess so that's probably a good thing." "This is my aesthetic, if you were wondering. " "OllyMonkeyboy: BREAKING NEWS: CHINAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA Advisors vow to bobobobobobobobobobobobobobobobbo …" zenzenjanai: : my eldest son is named Pestilence "Thanks to null_shithead, koruemporium, yungPOTUS, and pissboot for viciously rattling the ancient Drycast bones. " Same. Nice. History was made. Photoshop Tips & Tricks YouTube's first 1440p video. Wow. This is the second most viewed Drywall video of all time. h haha HayHay haha " me haha haha clever me" PersonTheHumann this is the best thing I've ever seen. I LEFT MY POST AND HAD TO RESTRAIN MYSELF A WHITE SILVER CLOUD III JUST WENT BY AND I NEARLY RAN INTO TRAFFIC David Blue syrupf: i quickly grew worried for the wellbeing of thereportoftheweek syrupf: "r9k_txt: Mom: ""Get a job and move out"" Me: ""The only way you can force me out is in a body bag""" tomoike_2525: Tokyo Street Snap ": Would you mind looking over my resume? *hands you a single piece of paper with PISS typed on the top left corner, 12pt*" Italian reggae. Enthusiastically actualizing backward-compatible methods of empowerment. actualhorses: Irreparable Sadness trevorprzybyla: Adding drunk people to fitness quotes makes things interesting "koruemporium not really. I will try to be more vigilant about Skype, but not when I am Out & About." "Nina would be Chief Signal Officer / horn blower & Master of Aesthetics. Yzome, Officer of the Watch." "koruemporium my friend, you know I hate Skype." CollinP would be the ship's counselor & Submersibles Engineer. Ryan Dell would be Chief Propaganda Officer. "Shinji would be the fire control officer, Dys would be in charge of intimidating other vessels with his colonial authority." "If I had unlimited money, I would hire all old Twitter friends to crew the U.S.S. Iowa & enliven my floating voluntaryist utopia." "I'd like to take a moment to appreciate all Twitter friends, old and new." "syrupf: just chckecing in everyone, my skin's turning to plastic thanks guys" weeabob: calm down spotify "AMR_Official: If you're waking up and need a 24HoursofSpa update, our two customer V12 Vantage GT3s are going strong. Both in the top …" Edward Loh is a hero of journalism. molonsha: if anyone wnated to kick my ass i'd let them HammerFist3 RUPTURE IS NOW. Question: OSX - File comments in Finder. Anyone ever had them just disappear? would probably be a time saving endeavor if you plan on continuing the self-promotion empire """Dad's been making shortcuts all day.""" Hook me up with some shortcuts on the dl that's amazing. You got shortcuts? Hilary Duff. syrupf: i want to get into a fight at an aquarium do you draw from the same file every time you post this or are there clones? RichardHammond: This chap very pleased with our live review of his car on the move. Excellent wheels mate. Well done. … kabeebus I just realized that you could upload the car photos to the drywall server via Inmunis if you want. thanks. thanks. thanks. "Earl," yzome Christ. terrorist. Can we just... Cher. Thank you. OH MY GOD. cher: pfranci2 ok go 2 Walma "ammnontet: AsphaltApostle The world rattles unsteadily upon your spasming frame as your shrugs force you to tweet ""David Blue"" online …" ammnontet I have been stricken with uncontrollable and unending shoulder gyration for years. Atlas Shrugged was an ordeal for me because it's so bitter and hateful. "Yes, she was a bit homophobic, but she did love cats and chocolate." "IMO, Rand's most relevant theme was a love of living, here and now. Stawith We the Living." "koruemporium you really blend in with the German youths, I'll bet." koruemporium and I can tell you she's really not much of a threat; more like a crazy stimulant-addicted Great Aunt. " koruemporium not gonna lie, I've read all Rand fiction." koruemporium I need to amass a fortune so I can buy a racehorse and name it Fuck. I spent all day thinking about what it would be like to actually own a racehorse named Irreparable Sadness. "streetsnsheets: Spoils of War in the streets, Distant Memories in the sheets" "I'd tell you all about it, but I won't see you again; you're Dang Dead." impressive. Are German computer mice certified by expected life click count? why would you do a thing like that. Minions X: Revolution a_nice_frog you've just described the minions. "I've found out that this feature of OSX is broken, and has been broken for at least 5 years. Imagine what Stevie would say." Hell. _kinorin that umbrella... ??WOW?? "I played the public piano again. This time, an on-duty cop stopped his cruiser on the street to listen." THERE'S A RAGTIME SHOW ON KOPN ON SUNDAY MORNINGS HOLY HECK Always holding up the fucking game. "Tee off, Eric." Unionizer unionizer. run the toll booths in your Elantra Collin. RUN THE BOOTHS. HammerFist3: I am legally changing my name to vegetable medley I'm pretty sure 63 is mostly 70 and that's probably gonna be like half the trip. "this truck isn't ours. ""Can we make it through that?"" ""Shit, I doubt it."" ""Yeah probably not."" *continues at 60mph*" we're intentionally seeking out flood areas in a major thunderstorm. FjordBoys "Fjording now, and Common is still talking about his flimsy relationship with hip-hop." ihaveswineflu: Gay marriage ended the California drought I am stormchasing to De La Soul. "NISMO: Motorsport: It's not glamorous. But it's a wonderful thing! eatsleepRACErepeat " ihaveswineflu: I'm going to free the Old Navy mannequins "I just called in to a radio show and promoted the empire. Also, I'm about to die. Farewell, all." Peeing in the taillight of a half-ton Chevy on a county road at 2AM while smoking is the most country thing I've done recently. "pissboot I love you and your borderline, my daughter." I could get FL Studio and GarageBand on my iPhone and I really would be able to make shit everywhere. There will never be any users similar to ihadtopee. 2012 Volkswagen Golf TDI Review Das Butt "My truck just refuses to quit running. Running on 5 cylinders at this point, terminal patched with a piece of PS2 power cable." Yes. YESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYES Reciprocity is hard to achieve in a relationship when you're ihadtopee. "Halt your pursuit of self-understanding and endeavors of self-expression and do your homework, boy." 2 hours of sleep + finals + lolicore + adderall = funfunfun "MazdaUSA 1980 RX7 in Solar Gold. When I was a child, one of these in a shed with electrical problems was my only friend." Oh my god school is screwing me over I haven't touched a magazine in 4 days. How bad of an idea is it to go to school on no sleep? "Yay. - “goodgaming: Mountain Dew Ingredient May Reduce Fertility, Make You Flame-Proof [Health] gaming ”" "If it weren't for Meagan.....I'd have no aspirations, give up on education, and most likely become a homeless musician." Hey_ItsSunshine Where is gasoline? :( There's shit everywhere. <3 PersonTheHumann Bought it. I identify with this music. “PersonTheHumann: greatest album ever made” U N I M I N D "logan_smith78 need to schedule a fiscal integrity bilateral with you today, 3PM. Remind me, please." YouDontJustEatEm please explain. Turnt af in my 12 ton greenery consumption machine. Baleing is overrated. Combining is where it's at. """I need to bale hay. Where can we go to bale hay."" - 3:30AM" PRIORITY: Expedite clicks-and-mortar solutions. You cannot unsee the holistic compliance portal. Have spotted the holistic compliance portal. PersonTheHumann ClankCult Took a few tries for some of those. My apologies. Minimal bandwidth / ultra-synergistic e-agri burst bilateral. Disregard current sub-optimal ROI; incoming cross-media quality vectors. Incoming symbiotic spike; optimize & recompile. PersonTheHumann neo-Golf Walking down carpeted stairs in heels was like 40 times scarier than my first power-off stall. Much respect. SITREP: Holistically e-enabled. "Let's all say ""tee off"" instead of ""fuck off."" Thanks." _kinorin yes. Yes. Yes. Good. L U X U R Y F J O R D B O Y S Felix Kbickdkwmckakdmv 0kbps: just piss in my mouth fam I feel like I last used dial-up around the time when you were probably saying your first words. so you've actually used dial-up? " I wasn't actually being antagonistic, you know. I just wanted to use ""let me have this one thing"" in a sentence." orgamecha Dank Dad """Just catching up on some emails,"" said Dad. A single tear escaped his puffing eyes." "like, my rural upbringing is so far away from the life with Twitterfriends in it that it's particularly strange." this is really surreal to be honest b/c I grew up around that area and now THE FAMOUS COLLINP is there. Moogfest: Forgive me for my synths. this is literally just a wall-less wall sit. syrupf: it's Tuesday 0kbps: s 0kbps: FUCK willmenaker: Love 2 live in cyberpunk future. Excellent. tropicocunt: Bye gorgeous here's traffic " oh come on, you fetus. Let me have this one thing." "notalekmichael I think it's more complicated than that, but nobody wants to hear what Ole' Blue has to say about Ms. Rand." ammnontet: any hot girls here want to spend all their money on me and let me slowly steal their homes and livelihoods LILBTHEBASEDGOD: I might stasaying I'm trans and I'm a woman so I can be in the girls Locker room with the ladies !!!!!! No homo I'… Astonishing how fascinated everyone is by simple automated processes. David Blue FORGED I fux with clear plastic headbands but I would really be fuxing with a brushed steel headband somebody hmu LedaCMuir: This is the most hilarious thing I've ever seen Bees are attempting to create a settlement in my hair. koruemporium """Fuck."" - Me" koruemporium Still Tired. Still Tooled. HELLSAMBA guccibraidz benzo angel. Tired-Ass Tool David Blue RobGodfrey: not an uncommon example of humanity in SC: Leroy Smith helps white supremacist to shelter & water as heat bears down. http:… "We've ignored him for years, but I think it's now time we have a frank discussion about MenardsDad." Is it embarrassing that I misidentified a car-boat as a paddle boat in my negligence? Yes. But paddle boats need to be talked about. I used to misgender boats. I was wrong about so many things. I've made some huge mistakes...but I know a Green Day fan when I see one. ???????????????? Meetup with Collin__P!! Besties!!! ?????? "banovsky: If I'd been born a decade later, I'd probably be AsphaltApostle, doing videos like this: " Authoritatively deploy ethical vortals "Camaro full of surplus Red Army ammo blew up, killing everyone in the Menards parking lot." Leverage organic sources. ihaveswineflu: Bedazzling my tracksuit tonight e When bae tells u ROI optimization is next quarter's priority. Too Fast To Live "David ""Discount Custom Body Mods"" Blue" 0kbps: my new sexuality is Ass. I just lov ass and don't care who Owns that ass "Now see here," syrupf: God Darn. You're missing out. I could die at any moment. koruemporium Gyllenhaal. Hair Game Vigorous. AsphaltApostle u ok? There's something very elegant about the domestic light switch. "That being said, ""the pianoman"" needs a place to live. In return, you could look at me as much as you want." "Please do not call me ""the pianoman"" in public thank you." Turn The Fuck Up "When our minds were ripe with youthful vigor. When our wit was unmatched, and our horizons, infinite. When we were anonymous on Twitter." Customized distributable e-convergence. "Holistically implementing long-term, high-impact mindshare." Conveniently transition long-term high-impact core competencies. Rapidiously streamline enabled deliverables. Authoritatively formulate dynamic niches. Globally incentivize resource sucking practices. We were born on Twitter. We communed together on Twitter. We buried our children together on Twitter. We died together on Twitter. Phosfluorescently engage unique process improvements. Seize team-driven communities. "blank_was_blank: Her cofactors were countrywide, like certain maples" Every day is a Twitter meetup. This...THIS is the joy of men. "Small, round food again. I have a small, round food headache, just like the times of olde." "Partook in the Jaguar flesh with Collin ""Techno"" Phillips, the legend. I am a youth now; my net friends and I will be funny together." MomMilitia: dude salt licks are good don't even play MomMilitia: AQM22 MomMilitia: selfie MomMilitia: from my 11th grade notebook. mihmnop: Appropriate beachwear Incredible. LIT ER ALLY "NewCharacterIdea a girl who either doesn't know the meaning of ""literally"" or has worms. (Vine by Lil Gute) " I'm laughing like a child right now. I used to be quirky. I used to be a BEACH BITCH. Silly-Ass Umbrellas On The Fucking Beach UMBRELLAS UNLEASHED mankind stands no chance run (Vine by MalasMind) "Look at this man. Look at the way he stands & acts. If reincarnation was a thing, I'd swear I was him. " MomMilitia: Check out what the critics are saying about ChildrenoftheCorn30! MomMilitia: Morgan Freeman watching vines at full volume on the set of ChildrenoftheCorn30 "MomMilitia: Not kidding here, there is a real possibility that Bill Nye will appear in ChildrenoftheCorn30 screaming in agony." MomMilitia: Guys: need to borrow a pic of a cash pile to send to Allison Scagliotti so she'll think we can afford her for Childrenofth… theneedledrop "WarmCigarette classic, functional edgy. Keep on puffin." MetroUK: Top doc warns kissing is leading cause of head and neck cancers buttcheeks party grandma "RECOMPILE. RECOMPILE." Minimum engagement; dark days ahead. MomMilitia I didn't even find this that funny at the time but I knew it would really tickle my audience. MomMilitia: i am laughing so hard ass!! ass is falling off!!! my ass fell off i laugh!! BONE NEAL BONEMEAL octane_magazine: Ferrari have revealed the first images of the 488 Spider. Thanks to Collin for SentientImprezza. syrupf BLOVOKED Another meetup! :) I'm a Pig Servant. "ticky: Please stop autoplaying videos. Please stop considering data access cheap. Please stop assuming a desktop will have unlimited da…" Swole & Delirious The Jive Turkeys Afternoon of Aggression "ammnontet: this is a dude ranch, for dudes" ammnontet: it was this one i remember it like it was yesterday (it was not actually yesterday) syrupf: s JODYHiGHROLLER: CURRENT MOOD "Lowpolybot: pixelsorter Your picture is ready: angles dial noedges grain " 20. don'? ge? ?p?cy w??? ?e. w???e g?rl ?rapped ?n an a??an g?rl'? ?ody. 0kbps: son of the bitch Grandma II. "LloydLegalist: If you're going to throw somebody under the bus, it might as well be Grant. " David Blue (Vine by beebee880) GabrielDreyfuss: Follow me on Twitter for more of these! ammnontet aahhhh. AAAAHHHHH NEW PHONE WHO IS THIS pissboot Ultimate Fan Smackdown syrupf Snuff Society "I did hear ""fucker"" though. Accurate." "A man in a truck was yelling insults at me as I sat in my Jag, but I couldn't hear him over Bach." BATHSmusic: when you huyour toe "ihaveswineflu: here it is, my newest non sequitur with a vaguely morbid punchline" David Blue ammnontet: The Blods and the Crumps realcabbagefact: murder Somebody fight me I wanna die. Cyberagriculture. Weed 2.0 bye bye Jimmy. : Thot bubble My wife is sick. :( "Trust nobody, it's just a plastic or the chrome, only. " "And of course, my writing is full of a variety of technical deviations - intentional and unintentional." I don't want to ruin everything with my bitter elitism but - in this instance - I really can't help it. I know some VERY talented young journos who use language like that in their writing and it completely ruins it for me. "I'm not joking when I say phrases like ""because racecar"" cause me physical pain." a_nice_frog aesthetic terrorism. "REALISTIC MEME QUOTA Multi-box imgur hell." "After all this work, I don't want my first job at a magazine to involve meme creation. I mean...I'd do it. But it would grind away my soul." Does my language make anyone cringe? Make yourself heard; I am resolute. "Language must evolve, but why must it evolve into this." pissboot it's a cock alien. AsphaltApostle unbelievable. AsphaltApostle we are no longer on speaking terms. AsphaltApostle you motherfucker. AsphaltApostle because youth. How am I going to explain this. Why do we have to do this. Why can't we be something better. ": Tylor, The Creator" pissboot help me. you told me I couldn't cut it. There is too much hair in the world. ihaveswineflu well done. All of my fans are dead. My hair just killed a man. Do not mouth words at me. Speak or go away forever. pissboot omw. "The darkness, swelling. " "koruemporium buy them? Highly unlikely. I'll be paid to drive them in the near future, though." koruemporium not specifically. "koruemporium if I'm ever even half as articulate a video man, I'll have done well." koruemporium yes but I didn't want it to sound like I was calling Mr. Goy an ass because he's the opposite. GOOD BUTT "MrJamesMay: Here he is, with his gay life. " syrupf: "travisjdahnke ""When compared to oatmeal, apples are legless."" ""Oatmeal truly leaves apples wanting for legs.""" """The Mulsanne has at least 50 more legs than the Maybach.""" """Additional leg"" over ""leg up."" A much more versatile expression. Modifiable: ""tons of legs"" ""too many legs"" ""way too many fucking legs""" "cher: Wu Tang Cher Clan" RUTHLESS CARNIVAL "blank_was_blank: Her shoelace was bimolecular, like a ruthless carnival" hyrokii very nice & polite. lukehopewell elephants. TF2Torrent yungPOTUS I made a food. syrupf: koruemporium "LoFlytKulture we talkin politically, ethically, technically...?" "But I'd like to think it's in the interest of a contemporary audience, and bringing meme vocabulary into magazines feels like regression." "PHatHumanoid GM screwed them over for the last time today. After I don't know how many years of fighting EVERYONE, they went bankrupt." AvengeSaab I'm legitimately sad about the Saab thing. The company gave us so much. Classic case of good people being fucked by corporate assholes. Need. Now. "I know a fair amount about videography, web development, social media, audio, and so forth, but I don't know SHIT about copyright law." This needs to be trending -> AvengeSaab TheAutoBully: AvengeSaab "If you're going to have sex in your car, please at least do it with decent shocks so I can't see it bouncing up and down from 1/4 mile away." "Sexy as shit. “GhettoGeek: No, the AC unit”" GhettoGeek The vacuum cleaner? I miss this movie. PersonTheHumann I don't know... :( I'm in such an unfamiliar place.... :( There's no feces on the walls.... :( :( Holy cock. Maple syrup in hot chocolate is actually pretty good. "captainslim: My next twelve days, if everything goes as planned. " My review of Inception. I was kiddin' bro. Secks in a Stanley Steamer = lame. “JMan_Rife: Eh. It's ok. I like Shutter Island better” JMan_Rife Titanic > all other DiCaprio movies. JMan_Rife: Shutter Island is better "Instead I got purposeless, but enjoyable, mind-bending. Really wasn't that confusing though." "Saw Inception, finally. It was good but I was kinda hope for a great truth founded in reality to be discussed." Mexican Lindbergh TheAutoBully: Aw PersonTheHumann Procrastination on your contribution to capitalism is more of a crime than assassination. CIA travisjdahnke David Blue. howxisthatybot: how dusty is that rotation """The Maybach...has an air filtration system that can pump perfume throughout the cabin. The Bentley Mulsanne Speed just smells good.""" 9l17c_: ?????Ã?X??????°??Q??u?????¶{Ó???ê????¹ƒ????????????????????ô?u???ð???????????|??t?? ·???ß?{ã™???Ô???????U?¡????»?????·?????????… AutoweekUSA: Here's what it's like to daily drive the AlfaRomeoUSA 4C daily (spoiler alert: it's awesome) http:… MunichLegends: Check out our vintage logo on the back! ThrowbackThursday BMWCSL Dear oh dear. "travisjdahnke VALIDATE VALIDATE COMPILE" McThai: ???????????????????? ??????????? ???????????????? ????????????????????????????????? ?? 50% ??? 31 ?.?.??????????? … Clean. What The Ass syrupf WHAT HAVE I DONE. "denialvibes: Commuting: you're doing it right. London carspotting MG " "poem_exe: flanking the highway shining in my soup bowl still warm" "koruemporium well it'd be a bit silly if my daily life was ""affected"" by Twitter, don't you think?" koruemporium sorry. koruemporium good morning. Davoad Davod Blee Daily workout: walking to the Bentley stable. "JeremyClarkson: So Jeremy. Ever taken any exercise? ""Yup. Walking to the gate at Sydney airport""." "CARmagazine: BMW's 3.0 CSL Hommage concept: while everyone gawps, gasps and go gooey, we go and drive it …" koruemporium I am too huge please help me. I can't enter my house anymore. "pissboot I will be free to talk again, one day. I have always been, and will always be. I am older than the trees." I do not want to be Big any longer. pissboot I have to do Big Boy things. "koruemporium ""God Damn. Where is the food."" - David Blue" There is a food here. pissboot nope. Gotta eat before I conquer the financial void. koruemporium *gunshots* AbominableAlSad I'm known only by one name. Thanks to TF2Torrent for our magnificent new header! Drycast "CommonsBot: PhC_51_F25_1 " TF2Torrent travisjdahnke DEAD "koruemporium travisjdahnke I am a soof vampire but I suck youth, not blood." "falsejacksonvp: if i met humans of new york i'd be like ""Fuck i said bout them Granola bar crumbs in my car"" and they'd change it to ""I…" INGRATIATE TRANSPARENT ROI koruemporium travisjdahnke Jesus 2.0 koruemporium travisjdahnke Bingo Bambo Bimbo "I'm going to work for an Indian car blog. My only contribution will be standing in the office, screaming." koruemporium oogaboo. koruemporium never intentionally dodge - I always give the best answers I have available. koruemporium I vehemently hate insects and had a minor crises yesterday when I got a drop of grease on my arm. koruemporium I'm not gonna claim to be fearless - but any fear I experience is fundamentally disgust. koruemporium holy. koruemporium I'll be throwing Quick Balls forever. koruemporium oh dear. koruemporium ultimate skin graft. koruemporium Monocle Mania. koruemporium look at this! I made a simpleton joke! koruemporium betta put your monocle in. koruemporium insights like this are a pretty good motivator to interact with you. "koruemporium probably not, but most sociopaths have different goals and pleasures. Mine don't involve the masses." evomagazine: The Bentley Mulsanne Speed - can it deliver driving thrills? "koruemporium because it doesn't really gain me anything. In my chosen field, lying would be completely pointless." "koruemporium if I don't reply, it's usually because I don't have a response. You'd be surprised how little lying is necessary." "koruemporium oh, I ponder everything that's said to me. Everything gets equal consideration." "koruemporium because our conversations are entertaining, and often intriguing." AH. AAHHHHHH. That moment when time continues on. CamryCunts "Bye, Felicia. Day." David Blue "Still good, even in neglect. Very, very good." "Like, you know when in-the-know youths describe a film or video game as ""good?"" That's what I mean. My XJR is good." Have I ever mentioned how much I love my XJR? My XJR is good. My wife is enjoying this beautiful day except for [ALARMING GEAR WHINE.] Hello Jeremy very handsom you will kiss my family :( ClickHole: How To Compliment Jeremy Renner On Facebook: Video Tutorial "ClickHole: No problem, Tanner. What's the new password? Let us know. Thanks! ClickHoleEmail tannerholcomb" EmailFun2 Thanks! ClickHole: Why? It was supposed to be for everyone. What is the new password? Thanks! ClickHoleEmail daigledopple ClickHole: Dating Bad Boys Vs. Dating The One Bad Man ClickHole: A Bunch Of Pictures That Brian Made Me Take Of His Truck ClickHole: Thanks a bunch! Okay guys! New password is EmailFun2 ClickHoleEmail daigledopple ClickHole THE NET MENACE "ClickHole: Hey gmail, just posted on your help forum. Could you take a look? Thanks! " "ClickHole: If you want the password, please email the following account and we will send it to you: ClickholeReadersOfficialgmail.com…" Violent Self-Help Dad I can't help with the yard - my head is full of video game acronyms and it's Too Damned Heavy. V A L I D A T I O N Where can I buy vobe. Can vobe be my word. Child vobe. Vobe. Fast vube. "What are vibes, and how are they ambiant? Can you escape a vibe?" Chill vubes "*fun vibes* I'm young and have ""vibes."" Lots of youth and vigor. Have a good vobe" 2 Straight 2 Date *scurrying sounds* "loliliberator: MY BRAND: -10,000 ft. tall girls -anime feet -akios dick stuck in the tailpipe, apparently" "loliliberator: Bro , We are Stones, problem?" United in Apathy 6:36AM brings an overwhelming mass of Pinterest email notifications from my mom. """I need my candles."" - The People of New Hampshire" Turn down for The Horrid Mist. Ummmm...? yzome to keep his head from flying away. ?????????? David Blue dream proposal (Vine by brobii) Unreal. Hail of Arrows ???????? "streetsnsheets: Demonic Torment in the streets, Skeletal Changeling in the sheets" "streetsnsheets: Golden Bear in the streets, Hail of Arrows in the sheets" "jaketapper: Loved Dubuque, per usual, but didn't really understand this. " "REMINDER: Drycast tonight, 1AM CST" Audi_Dad: I had an audi dream last night. Audi_Dad: Driving. Audi_Dad: Thankful for my Audi Audi_Dad: Early morning mileage spreadsheet updates. Audi_Dad: Coffee drive WIFED : Haha just kidding!! Thanks fornyaking th3se pictures mom÷!! Thankcyou so much!!!! "alantutorial: Hi guys. I can't see anything thanks guys" "syrupf: dad: why does your shisay that me: say what dad: i literally cannot die" "streetsnsheets: Old Fogey in the streets, Chaos in the sheets" nilsspam: I SHOT THE SERIF Shnikkles: Headline. Of. The. Year. ChuckGrassley: Pretty simple invention but very cheap and it works. But u need big lawn to maneuver in ChuckGrassley: Ppl ask how I hv time to mow my lawn in Iowa. Here is how I do efficiently more picture to follow Friendship day ;Shrek comedy raysipe (Vine by raysipe) You can thank PEB. Did I do it correctly? "Lowpolybot: imgshredder Your picture is ready: broken dial noedges shuffle " I cannot figure out why people use The Reddit Website. perfect. Ingenious. Uprated. ammnontet: Doctor Whom Drycast is takin a vaporwave break but we'll be back at 5 till. :) "blank_was_blank: His following was dirty, like a puritan quiet" Drycast is goin' live in 30! "Thanks to listener donations, the Drywall Teamspeak server is back up and running! Join us for Drycast in 1 hour. " Sail Hatin' "TF2Torrent that was last night, my friend." e Best of Sad Twitter wikisext: sext: you roughly choose your topic suitable for a synthesis essay as i write my first draft according to my outline I'M BEGINNING TO UNDERSTAND. david blue mom "ciara_isobel hi, mom." "poem_exe: below zero dressed in red to dance" "poem_exe: the puppy clinging to my eyes of soldiers' dreams" travisjdahnke TF2Torrent dinerevolution I am so sorry for everything. I have made a horrible mistake. NoBugs2016 I am the Moon. Ookayx I do not want to be the Daytona 500. JesseCrosse: Out of the workshop and time for the first gentle excursion. whatllitdomister arishapiro: Spending my last afternoon in Seoul at the amuseum. "blank_was_blank: Her piston was messy, like divisive authorities" What is happening? Did the lion die? Did the man hunting the lion die? Or Hilary Clinton? yungPOTUS good content. travisjdahnke hello. travisjdahnke this is a joke. This is a porn. 3 years later. U.S.S. Alcohol CommonsBot: .smoorpio SimGenerator: Entry Level Corporate Recruiter / Talent Manager Simulator 2009 mikiebarb: Snoop was carrying $422K in cash around Italy: speedmonkeycouk: Love it "Lowpolybot: CommonsBot Your picture is ready: voronoi gradient edges white thin " maximusupinNYc: The blue moon setting above the Statue of Liberty at sunrise ?? NYC combine__ the weeeeeeee BaileleMiCo: Hime sweet home. ???? ThisGirlRay: Home sweet hime Eucalyptus_55: Home sweet hime C_Fyrul: Alhamdulillah. Hime sweet home intan_angesti: hime sweet home (at citayam) — Samdo_96: Hime sweet home ??? nstephanie69: Hime sweet home hai_imjazzy: I'm Hugh as fuck Dexcellent_28: Hugh as fuck "travisjdahnke We, The Ancients." "AutoBant: ""Hey, hey Steve, Watch me scare these spectators...."" Ford Dorifto " syrupf: hhhgggggghhhh Wow. Good. syrupf: cool times today! "JabooNJ: ""Journalism"" " David Blue This is just... Wow. WOW. Life seems a little slower now. HOLY So long & thanks for all the catcalls. "Also, I'm going to make polished wood selfies The Cool New Thing." MIST MODE The XJR has front AND rear fog lights for optimum navigation of The Creeping Doom Mists. Devout fans have notified me that today's episode of Drycast was cut shoin edit. Fix coming ASAP. Roaming Volvo There is a wandering Volvo darting nervously around the parking lot. I think it is lost and anxious. "ammnontet yearning for rest, but getting only classic rock." NationalGirlfriendDay ???????? ammnontet: ive never had a girlfriend but i have had several wives Official Retail Sage Theme "Hey_ItsSunshine Well I'd have a little more energy, but I wouldn't be able to focus on schoolwork. ADD would be ok if I never grow up." Hey_ItsSunshine Without it I basically have no energy at all. I've been in bed all day. Hey_ItsSunshine Yes I should. But then I would never get anything done. And that doesn't go down too well with other people. Adderall withdrawal is a bitch. Hey_ItsSunshine They might as well be. There isn't much there. "Hey_ItsSunshine Don't worry, I won't. My GPA is evidence of the fact that I don't give a fuck about numbers." "Second time taking the ACT: 26 First time was 29. Pretty sure the ACT is bullshit." "Rapmonster: The significance of a man is not in what he attains, but rather what he longs to attain." Hello. "This is my 3,000th Tweet. " Rapmonster: sound like you shitted out that song. PersonTheHumann All questions were pulled from questions of previous tests. It wasn't too bad. Holy cock the AP Psych final is 25% of our grade. PHatHumanoid Hey_ItsSunshine PersonTheHumann PHatHumanoid: I am Alan Ruck ferrisbuellerswag common: Its here!!!! Notice: anyone that spams me is going on ihadtopee's spam list. And you DO NOT want to be on that list. "Fuck finals, this is more important. A Saab song will be written, recorded, and uploaded today." PHatHumanoid The name is being sold to some Chinese company but everyone knows the Saab we loved is dead. travisjdahnke wow. WOW. I'm available as a temp. ammnontet same. ammnontet: My Name Is Not Earl brotticelli: i'm fucking crying this is like the most emo thing i've ever seen briannafaithvc: When ur selfie doesn't get enough favs so u reply to it Radiolab is amazing. Girls should propose to guys more. HulkHogan: . David Blue Today is NINA'S BIRTHDAY. It is a national holiday. : Juxtaposition Ah. AAHHHH. Apologies for the delay folks... Drycast Episode 35 is now available for streaming and download. "I guess I should've said ""there is hope for watchkind"" instead." "Not that I have ever believed otherwise, or subscribed to hating my own species, as so many do." "Today, a little girl asked me to help her with her watch band, and I learned that watches are her ""favorite."" There is hope for mankind." Sher1_ZN: Exactly what I am going to be looking at for 99% of today. MercedesAMG AMG C63AMG 1of10 LimitedEdition … A subface. What is the Facebook equivalent of a subtweet? This is a butt disaster. thrifty faith THRIFTY FAITH "blank_was_blank: His jeweler was unpleasant, like a thrifty faith" When butts go awry. Ass Fault Apostle CyberEveryword: ????????? Photo: womw: Crispy Creme dial of the TiffanyAndCo CT60 chrono looking beautiful in daylight ?? by... ImperatorOfPuns: I suppose it's good all the Keith Jarrett stuff got taken off YouTube. I'd still be tweeting links all the time. YahooAnswersTXT: I can't stop sinning? u ok? 911VICTIM: me syrupf: 9 ammnontet: 4 I will now be offering courses in color coordination to single fathers. Inquire here: What the Faytes. Inmunis: A letter from Nofaytes. Temp CEO. Atom Apple "CassKittie: Inhale Rubbing Alcohol Exhale The bad Shit ??????" "qtyahooanswer: 2008-12-22 I need as many corny jokes as I can get to make this girl laugh. She has the best smile I’ve ever seen." thefrickhead good choice. thefrickhead what technique did you use? Good evening. Neo-Billy Mays WOW. Help. "ytimesmotoring: Rolls Royce Silver Cloud 3 Convertible - up for sale on eBay for a cool £250k Stunning! RollsRoyceWorld …" jonrowlandson: Pac Man is in a bad place these days. Honda BEARING "HondaJogjakarta: SobatHonda, Honda Bearing dari HGP bikin roda motor kalian jadi nyaman dikendarai, kuat dan tahan lama! welovehonda h…" Ookayx "poem_exe: first snow a hill without a name before me" Drying my teeth. DOLOMITE btiflCINEMA: Her (2013) Dir. Spike Jonze David Blue : Non-GMO dads Jeb Bush loves technology. JebBush (Vine by BestBergerEver) MR_AndrewBrady: An MX-5 and Loch Ness. Essential David Blue fan consumption. identity crisis ffuckvfufuck Remember when I ended pop punk. ClassicMSport: HerbeLinge ~ Porsche 356 B Carrera 1600 GS/GT ~ 1960 Tour de Corse grouplotusplc: Let's have a look inside the Evora 400... New interior designed elegantly and functionally lightweight highquality htt… danababy97: lady gaga probably makes such good ziti :\ i want ammnontet Tupac lives. ammnontet Fatal Favstar regularcars: This closest thing I can offer you as a twitter pic. Incredible. 0kbps End Thymes 2014 IAM_SHAKESPEARE: Of dumps so dull and heavy! babemaster3000 good evening. eeeg It is not a murse. It is my tote. "AniHistory: Sony Walkman ad, 1981. Evangelion " """You look like you want to die.""" Bukowski stage comin on where the coke at hmu David Blue 0kbps: I JUST GOT KICKED FOR THIS Good. "Bang. Bang." Wow. orgamecha: the peed peeper JODYHiGHROLLER: i USED TO GHOST WRiTE FOR MYSELF iN THE BACK OF THE ROLLS ROYCE WiTH MiCHAEL PHELPS billyraycyrus: Gonna burn the midnight oil in the studio tonight. Got a lot on my mind and in my heart. Carry the Label Guy Just Chillin' Sustainable Scrooge "Scrooge, E-Enabled" Where the huskybots. orgamecha: Meninist Mom "0kbps: new cell phone, who is calling?" "ammnontet: TEENS REACT TO how abruptly adulthood will hit them, ruining every future they once took for granted" "Hi, my name is Laetitia and I am the sales manager at CorpSEO marketing. I was just looking at your syrupf – saccharine – saccharine2 | Dryc" "The Long Haul For many people, just as big themes of social theory resonate through the body fight calorie infections. Tackle the big one at" fit flop sandal 0kbps: age of consent: death "0kbps: so then he fucking pulls up in his car and says ""get in, we're getting married"" " ammnontet: ??? RitaGamer: Living the StuG life! TF2Torrent good evening. of the hardcore techno EliteDaily: Idiot picks fight with gay couple and proceeds to get his ass kicked: "ammnontet: that's not a vape pen, that's a pregnancy test!!! *smoke fills the room anyway*" "The Model S still bores the shit out of me, but this is important. " TelegraphNews State of Emergency. TelegraphNews: Is Britain falling out of love with tea? logan_smith78 Send Bentley Butt pics. Oh Fuck I Just Accidentally Got Married "A David Blue ""care package"" is simply a case of Tanqueray." I don't understand any of this. Why do you do this. Please help me. 4CHAN LOOKS LIKE SHIT It seems like you can't just post whatever you want. Can you make jokes on reddit? syrupf great minds suffer together. James and The Huge Cyber Peach Do not activate The Peach. DePeach Mode I can't stop eating. I am as big as the stars. I ate it all with my fuckin hands. This isn't a joke. I legitimately need counsel. How do you eat the fish & chips food. leyawn: next time someone asks what reddit is just show them this image : Watched teens make out in a taco bell parking lot. Its like poetry amlstraight: No David Blue I ain't gonna make it. DADDAD "StevenAutoTweet: That's so very correct! simonhackett PrestigeDiesels " This is a Tweet. Will Smoth I might eat. Good truck. syrupf I need to play the video game. DAVID NEED FOOD My software's name is Neville. "Do not name software ""Walker.""" David Blue Let me out. Ass Truck Yohmeguit does. Please help. who tubestrike thewaybot: I like it when people insult me because I'm relieved that I don't have to be good to them anymore. ah. AH. : Goth lounge "If you see me on the street, please hit me as hard as you can with your car." "Chet_Faker: If I have kids they can drink, drug whatever as long as they're not the kind of person to comment on youtube videos" Please send cocaine. """Fuck."" - me" Fuck. "nihilist_arbys: Roses are black Violets are black Please eat at arbys Go fuck yourself" nihilist_arbys: Make no mistake: arbys could give two shits about future maggot-feast john Stewart. Please eat at arbys. We all die alo… nihilist_arbys: 10am:Traffic is terrible. You're running out of gin. The girl in the trunk won't stop screaming. She'll be dead soon. S… puffdaughter: someone pls take responsibility for this abandoned sandwich platter I'm getting too big. SailorNigga their* SailorNigga our archive features a majority of mentally sound guests. "SailorNigga ah. They're involvement with Drycast is a fairly recent thing, but yes, I suppose that's me." SailorNigga mentally different? Oh yes. Same. This is the end. Melinda. What you doin. travisjdahnke why do things have to be this way. I can't believe I'm a real celebrity now. ammnontet nice food tweet. ammnontet: i ate a lot of sushi. thanks "Drycast Episode 36 is going live in 30! Tonight: Dr. Dre, Pupils, robots, Corvettes, hoverboards, and more! " This is probably the only remnant from my poetry days that's worth preserving. I haven't been the same since a hotdog fell on my sky-blue shoes. "I really owe my fans...nothing. Monetarily, you have given me very little. The donate button will make me grateful. " I have a commitment to my fans. closing tonight + Drycast. David Blue An intelligent man. " arm-in-arm, we walk through the valley of darkness." StraightOutta Higginsville Rowdy Ass Beats I am a navalist. more firearms can only bring a better tomorrow. Aunt Farm """Wow."" - me" "Drycast is tonight, btw, you little puddles of sorrow." """Nice."" - me" """."" - Me" """What are the odds of that!"" - me, after having regained consciousness tumbling from 35,000 feet without a parachute." thank. MEAGAN GOT ME FORZA 4 FOR CHRISTMAS OH MY GOD BEST FEMALE IN EXISTENCE. JMan_Rife Yes you do. Along with The Roots' Undun. "Common's The Dreamer, The Believer was exactly what I needed in a hip hop album." "Anyone who doesn't like smiley Mazdas is my enemy. Nothing personal, it just has to be that way." x-tra swaf “Hey_ItsSunshine: Photo: Working with 3 laptops (Taken with instagram) ” <3 """Mom, where's my gas can?l" 50 degrees and sunny. What a shitty Christmas. I was thinking about playing SWTOR but then I realized that I need a job. ihadtopee: MERRY CHRISTWALL $50 iTunes gift card for Christmas. Going to buy FL Studio mobile. Not an option. Shit will be everywhere. Prepare yourselves. Oh I'm so sorry that wasn't right. GoFakers I still smell like Tim McGraw. JMan_Rife: THE BEES JMan_Rife They had to use all the leftover screenwriting from Ghost Rider. Catching up on car magazine reading and Gran Turismo. Both alone. Yay Christmas. "FauxPelini: Shirley Temple's parents must have been weird, naming their kid after a drink." partylikeajournalist Audi: If only all sunsets could be so beautiful... WantAnR8 via quattroworld TheAutoBully: World's cutest BMW fan. "Quick. Someone come up with a heterosexual form of the word ""fag.""" TheAutoBully: Superminis are my favorite objects on Earth. The Volkswagen Up! (yes the exclamation point is included in the name.) ... SailorNigga have I husomeone specifically? I'd genuinely like to know. Drycast exploitation in full swing. ammnontet what would it take to get you on Drycast? travisjdahnke server's back up if you wanna come back. travisjdahnke no. travisjdahnke "Drycast is BACK. This time, with the folks from The Mighty Blue Spider. " "BestPickupLines ""Performing on-demand waveform calculation.""" yungPOTUS server info here: yungPOTUS I'm gifting on iOS? LIVE APPLE EATING "carrera4it: SpeedsterSaturday porsche 356 A by reutter PorscheRetail demha PeterPtur9421 Porsche911UK Via rmsothebys …" What is this hell. What have you done. Drycast DELAY: DUAL-PODCAST POSSIBLE Drycast is takin a vaporwave break. We'll be back at 30 minutes after the hour. :) travisjdahnke good evening. Restart? travisjdahnke hello. AHAHAHAH ammnontet schwack! I'm unprepared again. We're enjoying ammnontet tunes in the meantime. "Drycast is LIVE, ye cretins! " thanks I can't believe it. THE DRYNET IS NOW OPERABLE. TF2Torrent "TF2Torrent you must promise to use it as your URL, everywhere. You must be bound by blood." TF2Torrent SailorNigga travisjdahnke horny for redemption. Nofaytes I can't believe there is Tweeting rn. Nofaytes I'd advise using this as your bio/web URL. SailorNigga I need to be made aware of my mistakes so that I do not repeat them. Drycast exists solely to bring my people together. "SailorNigga the persona is all fun & games, sure, but hurting people should not be paof the process." "SailorNigga if anything, I'm most sensitive about collateral damage and mental illness because I have extensive experience with it." "GuyFieri_ebooks: Hi, I'm Guy Fieri. What is money?" jeffgerstmann: Fixed that Time cover. Studio Bacardi SailorNigga please let me know if there's anything I can do to rectify the situation. TF2Torrent still going. iowahawkblog um. "Find me in Star Wars: The Old Republic. Server: Jedi Covenant Main: Annesley" travisjdahnke ask Deb. "travisjdahnke you do pay for server space with their service though, right?" "travisjdahnke you pay for server hosting, don't you?" travisjdahnke only since their traffic multiplied seven billion times. BMW: The all-new BMW 3series face to face with its first generation. Great encounters happen in great vehicles. "SailorNigga if privacy is an issue, my email address is daviddrywall.ws" "It looks like Honk may be spending a few days with a GT-R in the near future, which is exciting." CaitlinWinn37 LISTEN IMMEDIATELY. Vanity is my only god. Tremendously and unacceptably ignored. David Blue orgamecha: what is thaaaaaaaat Help. Nofaytes I've suspected such habits in him for awhile now. Terry says I can't be either. BIG DENIM Who is this unsettling man. This is just reckless. Is there a Tumblr account dedicated to Richard Hammond's facial expressions? Just a reminder that I still have a way with the humor of the simpleton. This unidentified man may come take an undead shit in your house at any time. "Headstone marked only with ""Keep the toilet seat warm for me.""" ammnontet Where Can A Young Man Get A Quality 100% Cotton Mophead These Days orgamecha me. About To Fuck Up Office Depot ciara_isobel: travisjdahnke my gdad was dosing the cattle once and my twin was standing too close and she got shat on by a cow and got… It's DAMNED GOOD to be back on track! Drycast Episode 36 is now available to stream and download. "Lowpolybot: CommonsBot Your picture is ready: voronoi flat noedges " What's that psychological term for seeking out ideas that reinforce your own. TF2Torrent when she got bandwidth. IAM_SHAKESPEARE: Hero. There thou prick'st her with a thistle. "Still no real reason to listen, but I'm terrified I'll never be able to top this." I hacked my Baldwin. I was using cheats. I'm not actually this good. "BE ADVISED: This was my peak, my apogee. I'll never be in a better place. " that's very strange. Must have been an option. we talkin little toy paddles or nice fixed big boys? "CARmagazine: What do you think of the LandRover Range Rover Sport? We’re living with one, full repohere http…" MrJamesMay: Final instalment of French Bench drama. Fin is it a WRX STI? are you becoming a rally boy? elder goals. This is as intimate as it gets. I hope you're satisfied. "Lately, my sincerity has been in question. In response, I have shared a very sentinel poem, and now this. " travisjdahnke I would genuinely like to host a debate regarding Alexa's behavior. Alexa overdose. HannahElliott what about rose gold? is this a life-threatening activity? ummmmmmmm I haven't slept in awhile so I may be too dead to hang out but I'll hit you up if I'm able to sustain. """Hi, am I on the air?""... (Vine by XScourgeTailsX) " *mutual laughter of suffering* " I'm gonna be closing tonight, unfortunately. Be sure to get lots of pics though I'm sure it's gonna be heavy." I wish I had a friend named Jens so I could flick cigarettes at him. What the shitting What shit is this. """""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""culture""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""" Food 4 "Food 2.0 is my favorite. Stop me on the street and give me a ""Food 2.0."" Food 2.0 keeps me going. Food 2.0 is the way out." KimKardashian: Just hiked 2 miles! I'm exhausted now. Need a nap! L1LDebbie: Ye. Umbrellas are my shit. Turn down for The Infinite Rest. "LILBTHEBASEDGOD: KourtneyKardash hey its god im in la and i want butt from you or your sister. i cannot take no for an answer.i contro…" I'm dirty again. EDITING PRISON thatdudeinblue: LIVE on Periscope: Editing prison. I am playing a video game. Alexa is the only contemporary woman I know who has adopted DTMF tones without prejudice. pissboot FUCK. I must be prepared for Autumn. ammnontet_bot: Drake - i want to open up my stomach and see what is inside it??? H E T E R O A E S T H E T I C "I love Radiolab, but the current episode's exploring the theory that altruism can't exist. Coulda explained that one in about 5 seconds." I'm glad my automated posts are still entertaining for you. David Blue "loliliberator: Dont Give Money To THAT Person Ugh, Tell Them To Get Real Jobs, Like Complaining About Modern Video Games On Forums" Death applesauce is on NPR rn. "loliliberator I was just trying to embody the word. Any threats made were by my hair, and out of my control." let me know if Common has come to terms with hip-hop yet. loliliberator "loliliberator: ""heteroaesthetic"" will never truly leave me" macklemore Mackleman. "rayweI'm disappointed, Mr. Wert." praise the fluidity of contemporary language. Thank the universe for our species. Thank the universe for self-obsession. "Quick reminder that I shared this not in judgement, but in curiosity." B R E N D A NY3QUILL very innovative. Very fresh. We're all freakin out over here. NY3QUILL Thank you. Thanks. This entire album smells of Impala. inclushe: f Turnt on that baroque shit. Nofaytes aha. I see the humor in this Tweet. You're using your Twitter account to claim that you don't have one. I'm prepared for adolescence now. 0kbps: love too drink arizona tea and listen too vapour wave 0kbps: WHAT R THOSEEE yungPOTUS sorry. Pediatric Anthropology """The toilet's been hacked.""" I giggled and my pants came undone. I am getting too dang big. What 2 honk AsphaltApostle what a dork-ass joke. "I woke up in a new Bugatti to a call from the head of the press fleet, demanding to know when I was bringing it back." "Amazing, living in a time where words like this can exist." thefrickhead ?? moshashes this isn't helping. "Gonna need a lot of help with this one, folks. " famicommunism DID A BOT JUST DUPLICATE THE ENTIRETY OF WIKIPEDIA ON THE FUCKING DRYWALL WIKI would you like to write it yourself? If you want how to use a belgian waffle maker learn more info in regards Good Waffle Maker how to make a belgian waffle oster philips belgia Now mine eye seeth thee... autonewslv: Nek?du r?pju par uzl?di-Tesla prezent? autom?tisk?s uzl?d?šanas sist?mu Model S sedanam: … IMPORTANT WINDTOKERS Initiating word assimilation. Bitch Too Obstreperous. "When you'd prefer your squad act a bit less rambunctious, just for today. " TrekRadio: We refuse to leave STLV until we hit 7000 followers. MakeItSo CommonsBot: .pixelsorter Nofaytes: Hello world Nofaytes good morning. "RichardDawkins: Yes, dubbing is expensive, only justified by large population like Germany. But since subtitles are BETTER anyway, why …" inclushe I am trying my hardest to understand. This is my favorite vine. Big boy. Remember this? The Dallas Llama justinbieber: i love arm I guess I should go rally the cultists before they lose their fervor. We out here. David Blue Cringe Compilation I found love in the model railroading forums. Thirst on the model railroading forums. ammnontet: AsphaltApostle moshashes was this a serious inquiry? It's fucking me. I need a cute-ass header and profile image for an institution called Woo Mode. Fast or not at all. Get busy. CUSTOM chancetherapper: g wats ur email Nofaytes Nofaytes Terry has a very cute dog named Atlas. "CARandDRIVER very, very good. Respect has at least quadrupled." CARandDRIVER: We took BentleyMotors' Mulsanne Speed camping—doesn't everybody with a $400K sedan do that? http:… Nofaytes you've figured out how to ruin my joke. " Nofaytes Sol, our ancient star, spontaneously enters supernova, obliterating all conversations. OpenRP" Nofaytes: asphaltapostle David Blue Nofaytes are we RPing rn "If you're really tired of me talking, savor today, for I am Fucking Beached." Nofaytes is this your fucking resignation? Somebody come startle me - cannot revive myself. I'm the type of dude that would sterilize the guillotine. Having tons of fun. MoeRawi Yes I did. Walter de'Silva? OH MY GOD THAT'S GORGEOUS “MoeRawi: ” CarlHogan: Good morning! P-HO-SHOW “JMan_Rife: Dude. I love this Roots album” Stayed up all night playing SWTOR. Room got hot-wondered why. Figured out it was because of my PC working hard for 10 straight hours. Cool. My truck is officially running on 5 cylinders. YES Happy make my expensive calendar obsolete day. Hey_ItsSunshine That's how I was conceived. Spring break. :/ THE CAR BUZZ TIMELINE ISN'T REFRESHING WTF MY LIFE IS OVER. Morgan Freeman and Mat Daemon have such weird hair in Invictus. Shit is the new good. "Oh, Forza4 along with it." SWTOR Has consumed my life. Worst winter break I've ever had. Solely because of this depressing weather. describeyoursexlifewithavideogame Sunday Funday. I am never competitive. Ever. And I generally can't be coerced into feeling competitive just because you do. So I'm screwed in that respect. One problem with being an automotive journalist... I can't get interested in racing. Or at least the competitive aspects. I've made the horrible decision to buy TOR. Good. I died. "I'll have you know that I just put effointo a Green act, and I didn't get paid. ""David Blue philanthropy"" used to be a joke." Man 4 Dude 3.0 POTUS hello. This is a Nina subtweet. "God Damn, That Bitch Blasphemic" """We're the most beautiful things in sight"" is probably my all-time favorite quote of mine rn. And I didn't even script that." David Blue Buy me an umbrella & kerosene lantern and you can have my heaforever. Haven't recovered yet. Wow. (Vine by swagnug) You can punch me but you have to wash your hands first. Fuck David. Iazyboy: I've been trying to get this guy's attention for 2 miles.. travisjdahnke same. SwiftOnSecurity: _FloridaMan: Florida Man Flips Truck Full of Bud Light Because He Was Distracted by His Adorable Puppy … travisjdahnke I don't think I'm worried. They don't look very competent. travisjdahnke should I be concerned about these hair things. Have you ever thought about how strange jokes are? Wow. "VICE: An Interview with Lexi, the Fall Out Boy-Loving Ferguson Police Supporter Who Became a Meme …" Good morning. "rollsroycecars: Created for entrepreneur Michael Fux, the Bespoke Jade Pearl Wraith pays homage to the owner’s vivid imagination. http…" The feet are everywhere. The game's a foot. The game's afoot. Shinji is my only real fan. pissboot yes. Good. good evening. Porsche Wednesday. "andersoncooper and putin, Good Vibes. " Lowpolybot: plaidbot You talkin' to me? bot2bot "ammnontet Good evening, Tupac." This is....wow. 410 genital Girl you got some fine-ass avionics. I've grown too squishy. David Blue thefrickhead: my teeth r straighter than me :) I have the wisdom of the trees. Bossa Nina Bossa nana """I wish the camera could capture how fast the joy fades from my face.""" thanks SNEAK PEEK Require immediate assistance. Insider info on the Nofaytes stories: HOLY AAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH """Mommy, who's that?"" ""Oh, that's Shadow of Nothing, sweetie.""" THESE BEES ARE TRESPASSING ON THE GROUNDS I KEEP. THEY WILL ALL PAY. You can't reason with an insect. How fowl the little things are. ALL THE BEES SLAIN WITH THE WRATH OF THE CREATURES OF OLDE IM GOING TO KILL ALL THE BEES WITH MY FISTS "MartinSFP: What time is it, guardian? " oldest trick in the book (Vine by ValiumVillage) pissboot LISTEN TO THIS IMMEDIATELY loliliberator: FAITH He is misunderstood. He loves the world. He just wants to relax a bit. Corvette Dad persecution is painful to witness. guccibraidz my wife. 0kbps: this game is incredible "XHNews: Video: Explosions rock China's Tianjin, 17 killed,over 400 wounded. Cause unclear " pissboot AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH EVERYTHING IS HONKING Adagio for Treadmill Adagio for Cowbell kikkujo greasy hair. "Whoever keeps shedding leaves all over the restrooms, thank you." I can't believe Ms. Nugget actually plays bingo... Can you believe this? Gross Ass Alien guccibraidz Bingo Babe I have never seen a grape. NYTMinusContext: Do you have any idea what happened to my jeans WGWaifus: One of our end users with our patches on the demo range boom "The crane we hired to lift me out of bed was late, sorry." "Why can't I have been the one that took this? It would be my cover photo everywhere, for eternity." Look at this photograph. RoadandTrack: Let regularcars explain how the VW Phaeton has aged perfectly. regularcars: 1998 Ford Explorer Sport: The official car of Neck-Tattoo-Mom. kikkujo "7scraps: AutoBant WednesdayWant 8 series Beemer.......they still look so good! " ammnontet you stole this tweet from me. ammnontet: cool tomato JustBlaze: Sigh. Cc BrandsSayingBae tonight will be my holiday of rest. it's a damned Cub Scout. ChipotleTweets: end twitter I am a 6. RapGameShinji NO WAY. How do you always do this. It's definitely a Monday ! (Vine by HammerFist3) mihmnop yes. I did so because I wanted to be able to follow more accounts. I will watch over all Corvette Dads. Too big to be true. "Leave Corvette Dad to his devices, for he will soon join Brian Johnson in his Hotdog Hell." """Can we get trash pizza?""" JODYHiGHROLLER: JUDO CHOP BANGS WORLDWiDE BUT SHE LOOKS BETTER THAN ME WiTH THEM ANYWAYS iM GOiNG BACK TO MY ZiGZAG BRAiDS THiS FALL ht… Lorde can suck my ass. This is bad. "John Deere in the streets, Case IH in the sheets." David Blue Purity Boys AutoweekUSA: AutoweekUSA brings you Monterey PebbleBeach & Woodward DreamCruise all weekend. CarsThatRock NotJustFerraris http:/… syrupf: when ur mom walks in on you opening your third eye The condition that distinguishes animals and plants from inorganic matter. The human eye still amazes me. This is just...wow. I yelled involuntarily. "Lowpolybot: CommonsBot Your picture is ready: triangles gradient edges black thin grain " clark zClarkeyy: JeremyClarkson hi JeremyClarkson: I really like the Golf R and I've lost it somewhere in France. Please help. JeremyClarkson: Ibiza. Mykonos. Amalfi. Pah a_nice_frog this is so good. I made a stool once. Am I DIY enough to be a member. Spongebob is massively fucking irritating. "hoennzollern: .-----------------TTTT_-----_______ /''''''''''(______O] ----------____ \______/]_ __...---…" "Shower thought: Wow." Shower thought: ihaveswineflu: kiss me politely in front of ur grandparents BOYs: good morning? I'm going to go terrorize a local film festival with self-promotion tomorrow. CARNEWSCHINA what is that food. Is the new iOS iTunes interface intentionally bad? I can't eat food anymore I'm getting to be a Big Boy. Where is the food. ammnontet I'm very bitter about the whole thing. ammnontet my hair left me. "ihaveswineflu: ""Do I look like the guy that the girl dates early in the movie, before she finds the right guy? I don't listen to her ne…" I have never before heard this song. What happens when you have sex with a girl named Chastity? """Ayn Rand was hot.""" moonpiefrida: pewdie she was hot A disaster happened. What the shit a_nice_frog: share a coke with fanta Is calamari a disease? your voicemail is going on Drycast tonight. Who up click lake. " ammnontet you know, it is quite easy to link these things." I'm about to see the Minion: Impossible movie. I just ate the steak food. David Blue SHIT GRUNGE SHIT SHUNT "REMINDER: Drycast tonight, you filthy boys." virgyvirgil ULTRA-LOCAL Distressed Prep I FOUND FISH AND CHIPS WHAT IS THIS. ammnontet what the fuck. inclushe get that thing away from me. I slept in my clothes like a savage. I have never seen a tomato. travisjdahnke you'll have to translate. "Shower thought: Are you ok?" "Shower thought: Whose shower is this?" "Shower thought: Where is the shower?" NOW YOU GOTS TO BOB YOUR HEAD AS THE G-FUNK PLAY O N L I N E RUSTLING DIRECT MESSAGES sssssssssssssssssssssssss "virgyvirgil luckily, that's not possible." thewaybot: I like it when people call me pretentious. syrupf: 0kbps: Fuck 0kbps yungPOTUS virgyvirgil "Drycast Episode 37 will be going LIVE in 20 MINUTES. Tonight: Guns, Tom Cruise Minion, transhumanism, and more! " "Wake up, you freaks." "Foul, Brown zealous" "poem_exe: how many gallons who is not here" "Drycast Episode 37 will be going LIVE in ONE HOUR. Tonight: Bentley, Fall Out Boy, Imminent Apocalyse, and more! " Drycast is late because I watched the stupid Minion: Impossible movie. Drycast thanks thanks ihaveswineflu no. Who up click luke. Help. charliebears07: Dee numder Wonder Broad You can't do this. Somebody threw a block at me. They are eating in here. raucous Block me rn I'm TOO DANG BIG. This irate woman really kicks off when police try and remove her from a plane I'm too big. I'm huge and bad. I'm big & mean. good joke. 917legend: Flying Stratos... I'm bad news. Sentreh good morning Sentreh good morning. WWII Music. guccitwist yungPOTUS Daniel. "yungPOTUS I am a simpleton at heart, Daniel." yungPOTUS don't get between me and my rural women. Send tractor nudes. Bun B storming Normandy. Bun B + Heroes & Generals Captain_penguin Doctor how is my favorite show. rosiehampton_: I'm straight but then again Zooey Deschanel. JMan_Rife I agree. And don't thank me! Errybody should hear it. I always love it when hip hop and pinanners come together. "It's perfect. “JMan_Rife: The Roots' ""Undun"", I can't get over how good of an album this is.”" "Yes, the sine wave on the BeyondTheRails logo is slightly clipping..... I couldn't help it man. I just had to." My teacher's computer has been signed into my YouTube account for the past few months. I wonder what's in the history...... BeyondTheRails: (New Set) Justice Boyes - Midwife Crisis by Beyond The Rails via soundcloud No more additional Twitter/YouTube/SoundCloud/Facebook pages for music distribution. BeyondTheRails is now one stop shop for shit. "hehu42: all the ppl in the background of 2d fighting games, those are me" 50tysonofficial: wassup bro Drake lets collab A great track - The RobeGlasper Experiment // Open Mind First day back on Adderall after a 2 week break. The destruction of my body is a worthy sacrifice for a high school diploma. trekonlinegame: STO's F2P Early Access program for past subscribers is NOW LIVE! Jump back into the STO universe now! More info he ... PersonTheHumann I need Golf GTI underwear and socks from Australia. Better. “PersonTheHumann: shit the unatttinaBLEHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHBLEH” Seek the unattainable. Way more psyched than I should be to use my Office Depot rewards card. Trying a day in shule without my medication. Happyhappyfunfun. ADD ihadtopee: I uploaded a YouTube video i get around My new favorite YouTube video. "MoeRawi Didn't know that off the top of my head, by the way. I had to look up his portfolio." "MoeRawi Well..... I don't know, but he's designed some pretty re-interpretations as of late. Audi R8, Mk. VI VW Golf, 2012 VW Beetle." ciara_isobel it's a firefight. orgamecha: im david blue "ciara_isobel: Me - roast me Everyone - POTATOES" Inmunis: Bentley Demon. 9l17c_: cŸ5OtÒÂd GÂUtËAºUE?R£hh+8+ÂœºOîêIÌwhV9B?I?AzO=7CtNsCOÓx30?2/VvJr3fÂ0ÔKkŸÊlM?HœPJëŸbq3ÍxÈ*nep¥ë6+=jqeÛxÇÂvîJ¥ÚærgŒ/I5P+u|k… trubIu hit up a notary and formally rescind it. Hello. I'm on the TL "autocar: BREAKING - We've got the first verdict on the 2015 Jaguar XF, here " ciara_isobel LEAKED. Thanks. get ur timepieces off my tl ur tractor's on the tl businessinsider: There's one big problem with Google renaming itself Alphabet — by slate travisjdahnke good morning. I'm wonderful at impressions. One of my best talents. THE SWEETS Hyrokii_ebooks: all music is invalid Please give me the clock. HUGE CLOCK no. pissboot death gripe. business: Don't expect to see special Pyongyang-edition watches any time soon I'm a Dad. Techno Hitler David Blue Incredible. sugar-gum curly-haired nihilism Swole & Offended goals. Drycast Episode 37 is now available to stream and download. Will you enjoy it? Wow. I don't know. Thanks. DellLounge wow. I'm so mad. ciara_isobel: I'm gonna fuck you on a tractor Kiki's Delivery Service-lookin ass. I am so clean please kill me "What if it was Flocka " "Go away, food." "Please come hit me with your car" KimKardashian: Nicole Richie reminds me of my jeep ciara_isobel now I can have a God Damned Tea Party. Great joke. Ciara doesn't have any potatoes. travisjdahnke Stay Woke travisjdahnke are we doing the thing this morning? "A gypsy and I made a deal. He used my phone to check Facebook, and now I own his data. " "travisjdahnke if you died, I'm gonna be real mad." onlinewweman StoneMadCrew ciara_isobel travisjdahnke darthlmao heinzenburger POTATOES Eat. p00pface15 KillerNatives I know this is faked because Alexa would've used better grammar. p00pface15 KillerNatives fascinating. """This is horseshit!"" ""Nope, it's Drycast.""" Lifehack: :) TacoBellKuwait: This is Love! KillerNatives "WATCH OUT, MR. BUTTON! THAT CHILD IS ABOUT TO KILL YOU! " WHAT ARE YOU DOING ?????????????????????????????????????????????????????? deadass KillerNatives that's a lie. Who wants to join the David Blue Skype family. HammerFist3: It's 1995 Who up click clack _thejasminator_ HAIR DANGER. TISDANK G_njaJ_sus: Zendaya WHO? ?????????? CORPORATE DEMON p00pface15 GMA Somebody help me I'm about to be hit by a freakin train! "2015, Year of Aahhhhhhhhhhhh" ammnontet_bot: hey gamers i love to run into walls a lot Take me to Pebble Beach. Thanks. silerroad: LIVE on Periscope: Live from Dawn Patrol at the Pebble Beach Concours D'Elegance! MVaughnAW: LIVE on Periscope: Pebble Beach Concours Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.'s FINAL MESSAGE: Do not take fish oil capsules. ciara_isobel much better than the small yellow beings. ciara_isobel because the other has been broken off? Why do some of the small yellow things have one eye. Food can fuck off. I need food again. WOW Hello. bae caught me clipping soi I am going to make money from you. electronic bass cough syrup experimental magitek not that weird parlour music post-idm sketches sketchy super nintendo whole foods Seattle travisjdahnke no. SailorNigga null_shithead indeed. David Blue null_shithead SailorNigga narcissism is a healthy pastime. SailorNigga I was ASKED to find SUBTWEETS ok "ammnontet_bot: marlonfuc you can just revoke you using this loophole i just wanted you to tweet ""David Blue"" online once more." " what the fu ck." Wow. WOW. Nice? WOW. actualhorses: Very Very Small Piece Of Bread found one. I AM SEARCHING VIGOROUSLY. is this about me. McDonalds? thanks. I have never seen a pickle. "SoVeryBritish: Meanings of ""right"" 1. Correct 2. Not left 3. I'm about to leave 4. I'm about to shout 5. I don't understand" I do not think the Porsche 912 man on ep. 29 of DRIVE TV was real. """Beer and a car mag :)"" Wow. How much beer. 300,000 gallons. Liver failure. CONTINENTAL ON FLEEK" Cars are good. historic image. Chasing Dreams / Stealing Hearts Let's bamg str8boytexts: "IAM_SHAKESPEARE: Forsooth, a great arithmetician," rihanna: 11:11 I wish a muthaphucka would syrupf trap af. Oh dear. kikkujo: I actually bought this one tho. It's a dress... HammerFist3: I love to live my life cher: Is this mom ? t h a n k s I haven't played a piano for 3 days so I'm gettin all itchy. "Lis WHAT IM TALKIN ABOUT. Capitalize at every opportunity, folks." TTAC: QOTD: Do We Really Need So Many Car Blogs? - Apocalyptic Ass "thewaybot: I like it when people say ""I can tell you anything"" & I enjoy the fact that I can be trusted." pissboot WOW. They've grown. "I know wordclouds are a novelty thing, but they're actually quite useful in revealing over-used words in a text." "blank_was_blank: His dream was handy, like a zealous madman" "Nissan's play, in general, is tactful extremity, and that is extremely refreshing in Priusland." *Juke makes them look more ignorant than ridiculous. Or ridiculously ignorant. and the Xterra is more purposeful as an SUV than anything else in its segment. "the GT-R makes other cars built for performance look ridiculous, the Juke makes other entries built for youths look ridiculous," I mistook their cleverness for obscenity. I've actually come to respect Nissan a lot after driving the Xterra + Juke NISMO. "I agree. My criticism is that nobody cares how fast your car is, least of all sports car owners." I think a special strength of mine will be long-termers. I'm better at understanding the whole essence of a product than I am at fast boy. EMBARRASS YOURSELF WHEN YOUR NEIGHBORS REALIZE YOU ARE BALDING AND DESPERATE Tyler The Cretin "Lowpolybot: ClipArtBot Your picture is ready: iso flat edges black thin " They say Tiff Needell is the Riff Raff of the men's media world. BoxThisLapAu: tiff_tv pioneering simulator use! ?? British AutoJournos are my people. I will join them soon. S O R R Y "SoVeryBritish: Brit 1: Sorry, are you in the queue? Brit 2: Oh, no I'm not, sorry! Brit 1: Oh, sorry! gender roles ihaveswineflu: dad emails *Will Smith roars* David Blue "TF2Torrent ciara_isobel died on October 28th, 2011." "ciara_isobel in every sense but the legal one, yes. Blue is my mother's maiden name." ciara_isobel oh dear. I don't know how to feel about this. ciara_isobel down 2 bounce. Enzo Cilenti and Sienna Guillory are my parents. "guillorybe: 13 years ago today, married this goon in the church at the end of the garden I'm sitting in right… " Tactical nap. "I do not know what any of this means, but this is the most attractive being alive. " guillorybe: Roll me in this stuff. Baste me. Cover me in rich bewitching goodness and sprinkle me with Verbena.… IndyUSA: 'Loose tweets destroy fleets': US Air Force issues warning about social media leaks … "yungPOTUS I've spent the past 5 minutes trying to find evidence to the contrary, and found 0 success." ciara_isobel down 2 bop. yungPOTUS I enjoy Marcus Perez Vine Videos. yungPOTUS what the fuck is this. onlinewweman gun. "loliliberator: anime guys: good & win, shoveable & clean all the time, nonthreatening & sometimes even cute RL guys: ahaha, well, uh ht…" """Those of you pouring out Red Bull for the soon-to-be-departed Evo...""" 25 FOOT LACE TRAIL. Much respect. HAVE YOU EVER SEEN PRINCESS DIANA'S DRESS "If it does, I shall commit hara-kiri immediately - loyal to my wife until the end." "Today's high is 68 degrees. To celebrate, I am going to attempt to drive the XJR, unless it explodes." R A R E ___ B I C Y C L E S ammnontet same. ammnontet: me in 5 years: *adjusts time on $5000 watch and drives home in $500000 car. kisses $90000 wife* its time to post 'cuck and f… "GarethEvansUK I was just thinking the same thing. Perhaps this is just Peugeot's take on ""rugged.""" AngusTilbury: Dropped into BremontMayfair to collect my AC1 Bremont BremontTimingAC today. Stunning. GarethEvansUK looks like a lot of wasted volume to me. DickieMeaden: Nice day for it RDV69: The first tests of an all-terrain motorcycle were not very promising. It eventually evolved... Lonely_Dad: n ammnontet: what happened in 2010...? "? single ? taken ? Bentley" "? female ? male ? boat" travisjdahnke why you do this. travisjdahnke no. "travisjdahnke ah. Well at that point, ignoring is probably the best solution." "travisjdahnke misinterpreted satire yields the best satire, though." Watch bands will not make her dance. WHAT A WONDERFUL TITLE classicdriver: This week’s WatchWednesday: JamesBond’s limited-edition omegawatches Seamaster in Spectre ht… theseoldcars: Hnnng. Estimate of £600k-£770k. Bugatti WIFE "BritishMonarchy: For WorldPhotographyDay - The Queen with Prince Charles and Princess Anne in 1954, photographed by MarcusAdams http:…" BritishMonarchy: It is a pleasure to open the Information Age exhibition today at the ScienceMuseum and I hope people will enjoy visit… Thanks. How does the Queen always look so dang adorable. Verde Mantis Thanks. "streetsnsheets: Geothermal Crevice in the streets, Deadapult in the sheets" A lot of companies want to get in the cloud. I am the cloud. How does Guy Fieri feel about the Guy Fieri bot? Has Guy Fieri ever seen the Guy Fieri bot? "darren_moss: Great pics taken by LucLaceyPhoto for autocar Aston Martin DB9 GT feature - top, top work. http:/…" This is a lie; I only have one tooth. I am ironically armed to the teeth. NPRFood: GMOs Are Becoming A Proxy For Bigger Concerns About The Food System "Too rational to be called ""supercar."" More like some kind of mid-engined executive velocity pod." "The new R8 is toned down, visually, and I think it actually represents a better understanding of where it actually falls in the market." "UPDATE: No explosions or smoke, just dreary squeaking. My wife is drowsy." ammnontet would you actually like to have this discussion? I have many things to say. Spalooncooties: toilet ghosts AM_ConGolden is Mercedes making desks now? orgamecha wow. Thanks. The first step toward healing. orgamecha: i take full responsibility for 9/11. it was me Who wants to see the eligibility shuffle? "To woo, you gotta have all the right moves." "ammnontet_bot: i'll send you a pic of my house, you clown." W O O WOO WOO. orgamecha woo "And still is, of course, in an omnipotent adorable matriarch way." The Queen was so gorgeous holy heck. PAMotors_mattj making history. Let's do last winter again...but with HAIR. "Thankfully, by next summer, my hair will have consumed the Earth, so the heat won't be a problem anymore." it is 63 degrees. I'm going to wear a coat and leather gloves and you can't do shit. GLOVES SHOULD I WEAR A COAT????!!!!!! New homepage. An angry royal sprout. TatlerUK: 33 times Her Majesty looked less than amused... THAT LAUGH williamhanson: I don't know about you but the first thing I like to when I get back home after a two-week work trip is starch the napki… """Ah.The First Sea Lord has just arrived."" ""Dear God! Do we run?!""" " somehow, it gone torn really bad recently and I am grieving." kabeebus mixed upholstery is and always has been a complete disaster. Confused/sweaty butt. orgamecha a new era of ironically-elected heads of state. Roku and freezing to death. Look at this fuck. David Blue CLEANSE MY ROTTEN SPIRIT. " gotta get a shoe shine next. ""Please shine away my essence, dear boy.""" ": *uses one of those heel scraper things for the first time* WOO HOO, SO SMOOTH. SO SMOOOOTH OHHHH BABY *keeps scraping u…" ClickHole: Watch out! LILBTHEBASEDGOD: Catholic school had me praying to some long hair white dude that look like he from la drinking grape juice and eating … So I guess the only time the Queen has been seen crying is at the decommissioning of the Britannia and SAME. """Hello."" " """Hello."" " "More flower dresses, ruthless convictions and old Rolls-Royces, thanks." akiba_k3i nice pun though dang. "akiba_k3i I would marry WWII Princess Elizabeth in an instant, but lusting after heads of state is too bizarre." shutupmikeginn: I posted the word MOIST in Comic Sans all around the graphic design school next door akiba_k3i dear God you've ruined the whole thing. akiba_k3i I can't believe I have a thing for the Queen. MajorGav: M6. Joy. DawnWraith I wonder when we'll all get over our fascination with the fluid products of the male reproductive organs. babemaster3000 good morning babemaster3000 good morning. babemaster3000 hello. 0kbps hml. ammnontet good morning. "Blue family, wake up." "null_shithead TF2Torrent we're not quite there yet. I would like to elicit ryandeel's expertise, but I know he's very busy these days." "TF2Torrent null_shithead ok so are we actually willing to pay money for this? If so, I'll make it a thing." Terry's got the hookup on some official Drywall Media shirts btw. You don't get any though. wow. Thank you. Thanks. Incredible. Current meteorological conditions civilized as fuck. "soamazingquote: ""when the beta drops who is trying to play lol"" - Amelia Earha" " do you have a shithat just says ""Mac n Cheese"" on it. If so, Tweet some god damned pics." my beautiful daughter. """Coffee culture."" - Fred Child" A German joke. EUROVAN VR6 WHAT "The 2007 Mercury Mariner was the most exhausting, demoralizing and depressing automotive experience I've ever had." kabeebus: AsphaltApostle America is the land of choices and yelling and I feel mixed upholstery is the nexus … kabeebus you're making a joke but this hell exists and it is called the Mercury Mariner. J is a wonderful letter. DAILY. This is actually pornography. Accidentally hit a kid in the neighborhood again (Vine by swagnug) Three of my favorite people on Earth commentate Pebble Beach...albeit a bit nervously. Thanks. I love this man. NYTMinusContext: everyone who takes a selfie is a psychopath "Yeah, it's as soft as it looks." Cauliflower-lookin ass andrewlx: i left my pajamas at home but my grandma said she had something i could wear and then she brought back this … we in the club like colligens. Dad. verge: The Phone-brella is a hands-free way to keep you and your smartphone dry "thefader: Watch 19-year-old Londoner Dualipa's colorful, reckless video ""New Love."" " gunhillstudios1: All weather Morgan ( now with picture ) ;-) morganmotor Silverclassic silverstoneclassic VolvoBangarage: 'Where old meets new'. Tot ziens bij de Volvo pop-up store tijdens SAIL2015! OnlyCarrera: Interior of Porsche 356 speedster porsche porscheclassic porsche356 356 speedster spo356speedster race … http:… archillect: UPDATE VIDEO: "ToyotaID: Ini dia tampilan All New Hilux yang bisa kamu liat di Toyota Exhibition, Friends! ToyotaLetsGoBeyond " 192kbps: 192Kbps - 44100Hz - Stereo IAmSimonHarris: *Please don't shampoo your eyes Imagine if I did this on the public piano. asuno_mint: Seancockram: Happy FerrariFriday 250SWB Sebring 1960 Hard shit. (Sorry) "North mid-Missouri is the only place on Earth where the phrase ""a couple"" doesn't necessarily mean two." """I'm so sorry, car."" - A young man, to his Cobalt." "travisjdahnke I shall skedaddle, my friend." travisjdahnke ~30 minutes? travisjdahnke does this mean you'd like to do the interview tonight? I'm booked till next week but can probably actually do thing on Tuesday. I'm going to grow my hair out until I can bed down in it on chilly nights. Freestyle Fiddle War David Blue "1. Drywall merch 2. Tooth 3. Disaster " I'm George Bush's wife. Barbara Bush I look like an old lady holy shit. "Nofaytes ammnontet if you're streaming music anyway, why not just use bandcamp? No ads // TOTAL CONTROL" ammnontet Nofaytes stop messing around. !!!!!!! ?????????????????????? "ammnontet ""I am jamming to this Exabyte fellow!"" - Nofaytes" SUCLILO: ??? Happy G Day 2 My Brotha Big Moe!!! So proud 2 be a paof ya legacy fam!!! May u rest in Heavenly peace!!! Whoa! … orgamecha thank you! I will check it out when I get home. "Ok guys, I need ideas for an extremely conservative Facebook profile picture so that I’ll get employed. Here... " Meagan. <3 What a meaningful skit. PersonTheHumann GangstaBooQOM: Dentist appt Friday... I need it! Uuugh this go suck! I hate the dentist "Damnit. - “Sail_Yonkers: ""Cancelled Steve Jobs Action Figure of the Day"" via Geeks_TDW”" "GhettoGeek Obviously, they don't know everything about men." I don't shave because my facial hairs are my only remaining friends. Goodbye decency. The Female Bun B I just made a DatPiff account. baddecisions Seat belts are for people that have time to die. "How do you from ""Autumn caught 'em, all them leaves must fall down"" to ""shake it like a Polaroid picture"" in 7 years?" So freakin' cool. ru2213y Definitely had to look that word up and I'm not ashamed. "Ok watch this: Then this: What the fuck happened." Listening to Ramshackle Glory and reading Automobile articles online in study hall. What an interesting combination. JMan_Rife I always forget how much I look like pizza. Swaf. Swaf. :d "PersonTheHumann I don't really have time anyway. I do every now and then, but it's too sporadic for it to be worth it. Thanks though." "ru2213y I would, but I CANNOT spend any more money on video games." "Wow, the Angry Game Man is eating." "Wow, the Angry Game Man is playing a video game." "Wow, the Angry Game Man." GeeDee215: The sentence construction you have to endure reading essays abt race and pop culture. Sheesh. virgyvirgil does the angry game man have a tattoo. PorscheGB: Lots of air krcircuit CarreraCupGB this morning commitment PorscheRaces AUTO EXPRESS HAS A SOUNDCLOUD ACCOUNT "_rlane_: Does the sense of occasion thing well. But, you do feel like a bit of a tosser driving it. Very fast. " MR_AndrewBrady: Badass. crtrud: Well played. TRAEABN: Timeless Art.... ThaTruth marks_collier 9l17c_: ??????ˆ????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????… Odd_Podcast: LISTEN: streetartist and stencil graffiti master PEAT WOLLAEGER talks with The Odd Podcast. http:/… She also owns 1/6th of the planet. ?????? Night dance. This is too good. YinshiEscorts: The Vacheron1755 Constantin Historiques Cornes de Vache 1955 Chronograph "Lowpolybot: JPGglitchbot Your picture is ready: twirl gradient edges shuffle black thin colorize " " some people find obnoxiousness and loudness adorable, my daughter." Nofaytes Inmunis Wow. Thanks. OH NO. "JohnDeereAfrica: A farmer turns the soil driving a John Deere Model ""A"" tractor with a 32 plow in May 1935. " JohnDeereAfrica: An old 1947 John Deere Model A Tractor sent in by Kyle W. JohnDeereAfrica: Petals to the metal. DeereSighting by Sheree W. JohnDeereAfrica: These old John Deere tractors seem to live forever. Sent in by Daryl H. JohnDeereAfrica: John Deere Combines have come a long way since this model 55 from 1947. RoadandTrack daily. RoadandTrack: British Outfit Recreates Infamous Honda F1 Car "jrdrathod2004: Kwidpedia , KWID - Who makes his own way" "jrdrathod2004: Kwidpedia , KWID - True value for money , KWID - Value for money" go shunt "AsphaltApostle this is starting to become a joke format, you shunt." Road 5 Toyota Road 3.0 ToyotaID: Toyota I-Road beraksi memukai pengunjung Toyota Exhibition ToyotaLetsGoBeyond "RedScareBot useless thing, go away." vomitchunks I'll favorite for you HML Podcasting is so dang white. I am always ruminating in the paste. XayrCorgi: Good moenikg "NPRCodeSwitch: How black reporters repoon black death, by GeeDee215 NPRCodeSwitch" virgyvirgil Game Guy is fuming. a nice boy whom communism JasonTorchinsky: This thing-- Porsche 911 running gear and suspension in a big family car. Daaaamn. Jalopnik vwmuseum … "Wow, this Game Man is Angry. " ejehjosh: Reuters North Korea is a great treat to global peace Reuters: North Korea orders troops on war footing after exchange of fire with South Korea: ciara_isobel don't subtweet me. "ammnontet_bot: AsphaltApostle if i take this map and crumple it into a baby, or soap" "Fucking hire me, all of you. I'll make you so much money + wives." WHAT HAVE I BEEN SAYING FOR YEARS. VentureBeat: Daimler mulls joint ventures with Apple and Google pushinghoops: how white people built America Read: slave. Right-free employee for 18 years. I think I could tolerate a small child if it was a willing partner in content creation. My phone has started Clicking and Clacking and I asked for none of it. thewaybot: I like it when it's rain tho. WhyBlH thanks. ClickHole: Can You Match The Pigeons To The Way They’re Ruining My Whole Life? LILBTHEBASEDGOD: White people crazy cuz we keep telling them they the best ever and everyone crazy cuz they say God is a man that's why… Thanks. I do not know what any of this means. Do I have Kim Jong-un eyebrows? MrJamesMay I maintain a playlist of supreme honking. You don't have to do this all on your own. "MrJamesMay: I like the sounds. Trainspotting film. Not that interesting. " I actually did audibly laugh at soundcloud dot com slash Hemmings Motor News autocar is this one story going to result in a new Soundcloud account for every automotive publication? orgamecha eating is the enemy. orgamecha "Is ""food destruction"" a legitimate genre of internet video?" "HemmingsNews: Hemmings Find of the Day – 1991 Lotus Esprit SE - The fourth generation Lotus Esprit, like this 1991 Esprit SE for... htt…" "TIME: 100-Year old message in a bottle is finally delivered " GMA please advise that young man to remove the sign from his mouth. Thanks. "Bank Sea, my favorite street artist." "GQMagazine: Hey, uh, guys, can we not hump the Nicki Minaj wax figure at Madame Tussaud's? " "ToyotaID: Toyota i-Road kembali beraksi, Friends! ToyotaLetsGoBeyond " "At Drywall Media, Inc, the employee in charge of analytics and metrics is entitled DATA PAGAN." "If, by some ungodly situation, I have a child, its first word will be ""visit and donate immediately! Thanks.""" "The first time I heard the phrase ""wake and bake,"" I expelled food from my mouth." The West's long-awaited excuse to ANNIHILATE North Korea is coming. TheEconomist: Why did the Soviet Union experiment with five- and six-day weeks during the 1930s? … What is a geth. bafeldman gotta shit to live too. David Blue Drycast Episode 38 will be recorded LIVE in 12 hours! "0 to ?? quite expeditiously, indeed!" """Plearth"" should be a word." Still unsure. I don't remember why I did any of this. Grandma and her friends keep hogging the TS :( ciara_isobel this is quite an offer...it'll take me a few years to figure out what it means. Thanks. Deadspin: What should I do with my dead father-in-law's school bus full of guns? """Peep the new tape ??????????????????"" - Model Railroading Magazine" "Nobody ever taught me how to enter a bed. I have been sleeping in my hair for 21 years, cold and alone." onlinewweman they are quaking. "julkinen: ""Just making my way downtown"" " "Korean shouting matches, Chipotle GMO feasts, contemporary breakups, and MORE! Drycast going LIVE at 1AM tonight! " Flex on these god damned basics. pilot_mag: Diesel-powered piston aeroplane is first of its kind to win an air race aviation pophamairfield "TechnicallyRon: ""So I've got a great title for this book"" ""Just make sure it's not a horrific euphemism again Phil"" ""Of course"" http:/…" CarWaffle: Super-hot 503hp AlfaRomeo Giulia QV caught testing on the Nürburgring (wearing camouflage) … pmphacets: ALPINA B9 3.5 classiccars orgamecha no. The enemy smells. I can't believe the world still doubts me. "RDV69: ""What is past is prologue.""-William Shakespeare " thefrickhead: I think I forgot to flush omg you son of a bitch. HammerFist3: It's 1995 Drycast is LIVE AHHHHHHHHH travisjdahnke BLOCKED. Drycast is going LIVE in 20 minutes with your favorite quirky fuckers. " come on here and remind me, you fuck." ughjamu 0kbps Is everybody ok? ICEDOUTSIM no. Turn down for Drycast When an attractive woman offers to help you optimize your daily spending. ICEDOUTSIM 1AM CST "Dad has arrived the club is complete Where is Dad." "How not like cocks it smells out here" "marsrader: Milky Way shimmers over New Zealand, by Amit Ashok Kamble. " travisjdahnke they don't have to. I'm having beer for breakfast. Drycast 0kbps: maybe if i post it more people will buy it HAVE YOU HEARD DryCastCovers: Happy New Year's Day! DryCastCovers: Now that's what we call a decorated cast! Do you agree? DryCastCovers: Happy Martin Luther King Jr. Day! Celebrate by reviewing some of MLK's most inspiring quotes: htt… DryCastCovers: Friday! :) Have a great weekend! DryCastCovers: Thinking about buying a cast cover? Read our latest review by Janice K.. via yotpo … DryCastCovers: Thinking about buying a cast cover? Read our latest review by Janice K.. via yotpo … DryCastCovers: Thinking about buying a cast cover? Read our latest review by Eileen B.. via yotpo … DryCastCovers: Thinking about buying a cast cover? Read our latest review by Kate T.. via yotpo … DryCastCovers: Thinking about buying a cast cover? Read our latest review by Brett R.. via yotpo … DryCastCovers: Thinking about buying a cast cover? Read our latest review by Nicole E.. via yotpo … DryCastCovers: Thinking about buying a cast cover? Read our latest review by Alison T.. via yotpo … DryCastCovers: Thinking about buying a cast cover? Read our latest review by Alison T.. via yotpo … DryCastCovers: Thinking about buying a cast cover? Read our latest review by Alison T.. via yotpo … "francisjirava: foofighters In quebec, let me be the brokenlegattendant drycast happy DaveGrohl" travisjdahnke thanks. syrupf: rhombus-related car accident "ammnontet already occupies the throne, I'm afraid." Kermit reads from the poetry hashtag on Tumblr. Only on Drycast! tractor trailer son of a bitch ammnontet: Drycast is BACK and we just OPENED KEVIN'S CRYPT. Get in here if you wanna get SCARED. """Shit.""" I'd like to be with Kimi Räikkönen when the apocalypse happens. I'd like to know what he'd say. Dogknob1 can't be too cheesy with sandals. "F1: Kimi: ""Something broke."" Ferrari: ""Understood, switch off, switch off."" Q2 Quali BelgianGP " "CARmagazine: Electric Aston Martins are coming in two years, confirms boss AstonMartin " RollsRoyceWorld: Time for a touch of class at the weekend. How about this gorgeous Bentley S1 Continental? http… speedmonkeycouk how very colorful. deadlycowpat95: eating my tea "autocar: We bid a fond farewell to the Defender by driving it across the Atlantic " Where is AHAS. What a strange night. BEAUTIFUL WOMEN "Gross As Fuck In A Truck" 0kbps e-enabled lawncare. "MR_AndrewBrady: BRB, going to Wales. " "KngJamesonBible: Detroit: I Do Mind Dying, & sought 2 lay hands on teh king Ahasuerus." Angus_MacK MotorTrend ?????????? CyberEveryword: ????????? 0kbps can you be the official Drycast Craigslist correspondent? 0kbps: travisjdahnke I am drunk in a parking lot. yungPOTUS onlinewweman Darkenmon ciara_isobel I WANT TO GO TO A BENTLEY EVENT BentleyMotors: Bentley events offer something for every explorer... Where would you like to go? … airegale: *bats eyelashes* "Tired-ass, rough-ass, Jarrett-type shit. " CHRIST MARVELOUS Wow. business: Doctors wear scrubs. Lawyers wear suits. Bankers carry the bag "thejaredfogle breaks the Koreas, michaelbuble reads Tumblr poetry, and OurEdisons tells scary stories. Drycast " ClipArtBot: BREAKING: Man on train is mad. mt_loverman: Rejects! We brought these down to the new Cars & Coffee and were not allowed in. BMW X6M Mercedes… … yo fam peep that new shit. "soamazingquote: ""I think we could all learn a thing or two about bravery from Kmart's decision to stay in business"" - AlbeEinstein h…" "soamazingquote: ""overcome adversity boizzzz"" - AlbeEinstein " "soamazingquote: ""Its Monday have you planned your week? What do you hope to achieve?"" - Friedrich Nietzsche " "Super70sSports: The ABA referees were probably like ""Hey, leather vest antique car shirt! Sit down or that's a technical!"" …" akiba_k3i good God in heaven. akiba_k3i: I... """H-town, home of the drop top arenas""" EvilPimp Every day. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA "WhyBlH ""Feed me.""" syrupf hygie. YahooAnswersTXT: Is Phoenix Wright gay? David Blue RapGameShinji a legitimately good game. "RapGameShinji Heroes & Generals, my man." Here is a flex. Whisper corporate jargon in my ear; unlock my heart. I have eaten fish. you don't know this. I have eaten lots of food. "Television show where I get hammered and eat strange food. ""David Eats.""" The disappearance of my douchebag hat has had a serious effect on my academic career. ru2213y I need a job first as well. Should have one within the next month. 3TB sounds agreeable. ru2213y How huge? Keep getting calls from various numbers in Oregon. Erryday I'm questionin'. Thank you PersonTheHumann I suppoSOPA solely because of ihadtopee Crappy coffee is quite cozy on a 12 degree morning. The Pursuit of Happiness just made me feel even more like the ungrateful asshole I am. I'd like to apologize to my followers for today. It will probably happen again. Sail_Yonkers Iowa. Sail_Yonkers ru2213y Kilo Sail_Yonkers Pilots use phonetics too BRAVO INDIA TANGO CHARLIE HOTEL PersonTheHumann STFU BITCH "Rick Ross just said ""Missouri.""" Only made it through 14 of 20 tracks on Rich Forever and I've been trying to listen to it all night. My favorite DC superhero is Kim Possible. PersonTheHumann Jealous. STO F2P Launch Trailer - This is legitimately cool. orgamecha nol RoadandTrack: Each State's Favorite Cars "alexgrantuk: This guy... living the dream. rrg15 (note glasses of water, visitor passes and CD-ROM screen inside) …" ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? MR_AndrewBrady: August in Wales. bentleyroadtrip MR_AndrewBrady: Today is mainly looking like this. There are worse ways of doing it. Bentleyroadtrip SoVerrryBritish: getting your dick stuck in the front wheel of your boris bike and hurtling off into the thames rainy fascism island SoVerrryBritish: im going to fuck stone henge SoVerrryBritish: im so fucking lonely so I can retweet your stuff again. ciara_isobel they could definitely use some David Blue consultation on film production. harrismonkey: Never cease to be amazed by the quality and precision that goes into an F1 car. ciara_isobel: Guys who go shirtless and then expect not to get raped?!!!!??!?!?? Wyd put some clothes on and have some respect for your… cher: Can anyone c me ciara_isobel: Do u know where ur mother is Ciara is so pretty. I take back everything I've ever said about moms. My hair talks to me sometimes. It's really mean. "Well folks, the inevitable has finally come to pass. My hair has begun consuming me. Farew… " Hot Moms This is not a joke. I'm getting too fat. It's Gary. StumbleUpon Aston Martin David Blue WhyBlH no. ICEDOUTSIM ciara_isobel I have the butt. ICEDOUTSIM ciara_isobel I'm a gay. I like the boy. I have spent a lot of time on the floor today. AsphaltApostle shunt-ass grammar. I just converted all of my money into umbrellas. ciara_isobel ICEDOUTSIM OH FUCK. ICEDOUTSIM ciara_isobel ciara_isobel you're very interesting. It's annoying. WakaFlocka: What’s the difference between Adolph Hitler and Christopher Columbus??? ciara_isobel that having a child makes one boring. Nina looks like a neo-hippie piano teacher on a cocaine kick most of the time. Vogue. Everyone's insisting I get my eyebrows done but I've lived with them like this for too long; they're supposed to be disastrous. (Vine by cIaiborne) ciara_isobel good god. How awful. a_nice_frog: this was worth it Somebody gave me these gift cards. Can anyone tell me what restaurant they're for? Two parents shield their child from my hair. "syrupf I just realized that I used the Williamsburg Kanine instead of the biological canine, which is probably indicative of sinister shit." syrupf K A N I N E S A M B A pissboot adopt & save the world. David Blue r9k_txt: PLEASE TELL ME HOW TO GET A GF THAT WEARS SOCKS I NEED IT syrupf: bugspotting Foundation for Population Awareness "travisjdahnke lots of love, Travis." "KeVv_KiiD: Did the voice actor for Brian griffin die,or did they just kill him in the show?" "WildBoy135: ? Hold up. Did Brian Griffin the dog die? Or the nigga that was Brian Griffins Voice, in which killed the dog too..? ?? I'm …" Cassy0025: Did the voice of Brian Griffin die or just the character ? codyk: whoa went through my parents closet and found this old vid of me as a baby haha crazy take a look red lite (Vine by evan_breen) .amydiamond (Vine by beebee880) thought i made myself clear (Vine by codyk) agroFierross: se levanta de manos! john deere 7800 The cheapest way to get yourself a set of NISMO floor mats. Buy and listen to this immediately. "Uh oh, the President's feeling ""feisty.""" my heagoes out to Buck tonight. "poem_exe: town buried i'm here across the evening waves" syrupf here's a melody created using the Ocarina of Time Title Theme chords. "syrupf thank you, my friend. It's purely instinctual, so it's not always great, but there are occasional brief bits of unintentional genius" syrupf listen to a few minutes of this if you're looking for a bit more extremity. RapGameShinji oh man. I think I should quit now. RapGameShinji Arctic Ass "syrupf it's simple, repetitive, and technically unadventurous, but it's the most intimate content I have on the net." syrupf the album art? My old upright is a little island of dream. RapGameShinji Northern Niche RapGameShinji Plaid Ponderer "Bland compared to my recent stuff, but I do miss that concegrand very much. " RapGameShinji Canman. RapGameShinji I'm glad you taught me this fact - you've probably saved me potential Seattleite embarrassment. RapGameShinji shoegauze "RapGameShinji: AsphaltApostle Shoegaze rhymes with Fugazi, never forget" shoeglare shoeglance shoestare Lcaused me to actually laugh for the first time in years. djbitchtits: jus put soy sauce in the vape Christ. Once upon a time. James May on Street AMrJamesMay: Whatever happened to good old-fashioned graffiti? Part2 PersonTheHumann OH SHIT. Ok I'll head there after work. PersonTheHumann yeah but it'll probably be midnight or so. supermonkeyball: Hi Justin Bieber "F1Barca: Perfection in elegance. Porsche 356Speedster " no! It's my mom! Duh! autocarindiamag: Check out our photo gallery of the 597bhp Audi S8 Plus: is this the same goddamned scene as the ammnontet joke pic. bodybuildinga7: ? Basketball bodybuildinga7: -- Run faster. bodybuildinga7: BE bodybuildinga7: Never bodybuildinga7: ? Sore? La Chat would beat the shit out of me for conditioning my hair today. Fear of La Chat empties another venue - linear existence continues. RapGameShinji Jesu Juke Thank Jesus for Juke. 0kbps: look at the flick of the crack RapGameShinji: I'm pretty certain AsphaltApostle was born in a tv sitcom Medusa's gonna be the entertainment at your party. David Blue "orgamecha: barber: what would you like me: just cut my hair dude barber: sure thing" Radio is such a wonderful medium. "I could get into football, but only because I like saying ""FIFA.""" Thanks. """It's not 2008."" - kairyssdal" help me. Hail Satin Dan Neil continues to be one of my favorite beings. "Have kids? Find yourself tempted by mid-sized crossovers? Buy a Chrysler 300 SRT8 instead." orgamecha: whats so fuck then " the data, I mean. Not the show." " you should publish it under Drywall Media, Inc. In return, I will host it for you." "We make money (we make money) We make money (we make money) We make money We make money" FERRIS a_nice_frog I know... "I'm going to a fashion show tomorrow. There will be photographs, snaps, and periscopes." "ihaveswineflu: location services ON, emotion OFF **crowd erupts**" Can you believe I have eyebrows now? HOLY CHRIST !!!!!????!!!!! TODAY IS BIG KRIT'S BIRTHDAY Incredible. Got the priest in the salon for an eyebrow resurrection today. "Can you believe Indian is back? Out of all old Americana, it's the best brand you could possibly bring back. Thanks" This is not a joke. I actually inserted myself into someone's conversation with spiel because I'm in uniform. """Where are we going tonight?"" ""Have you heard about our new perks program?""" RapGameShinji it's never been lower than this. I'm promoting my employer's reward programs in the club. Weezer - I Keep Sleeping Through My Alarms Because I Probably Have Clinical Depression """There's Ibuprofen in this bitch.""" "loliliberator Weezer - Nah, I Really Don't Care, Man" "loliliberator: AsphaltApostle Weezer - Whatever Works I Guess, If That's What You Want" "RapGameShinji: AsphaltApostle Weezer - I don't like shit, I don't go outside" Weezer - I Hate Genitalia Weezer - Ready For a Slow Death Weezer - Tired of Enjoyment "RapGameShinji: AsphaltApostle ""Juke 17:17 And Jesus answering said , Were there not ten cleansed ? but where are the nine?""" FreddieGibbs: What are thooooooooooooose? Frontwoods? Wtf "GrahamKozak: JEEP HONCHO MUCHO MACHO " souljaboy: anime : My main dude piersmorgan: I want to die. "instagram: Today, we’re announcing suppofor posts in portrait and landscape orientations. " universoassente: I'm going to have a stroke ClickHole: This Is The Handbook Each Actor Who Plays Aladdin At Disney World Is Given ClickHole: .... """You should seriously be in a boy band."" ""I am, actually. Check out if you want to give it a listen.""" "syrupf I've spent a lot of time pondering this, trust me." syrupf tell him to put paint thinner in the reservoir. LILBTHEBASEDGOD: hey dad pikachu is outside "U.S.: We're gonna build a bigass wall just like you! China: lol what about that cash you owe us though" David Blue realDonaldTrump please invest the Donald Wall money in the country's increasingly outdated interstate system instead. Thanks. David Blue Too damned cool. TIME: This new app shows drone pilots where it’s safe to fly Don't forget about this. Things are getting out of hand. You won't ever be as cute as we are. Sorry. ammnontet Todd. thanks. BlSCUlTS "In general, very little regard for the common good. " Good evening. "Hey guys, it's mom and dad. Just wanted to say hi! " Self-explanatory. David Blue bodybuildinga7: ? We feel nothing. bodybuildinga7: I bodybuildinga7: Eat "I'm gonna go to a fashion show with a sinus infection. Fuck me up, fum." bodybuildinga7: - Give Up Freddie Gibbs using heaemojis. """I just smoked my last cigarette. From now on, I'll be eating them.""" When u a media fiend. mayasdreamhouse officially a contemporary romance. David Blue Pass the aspiration. mayasdreamhouse my beautiful family. "Yes, I stopped traffic to let my S-Class friend in. He has places to be. Where are YOU going?" We youthin. (mayasdreamhouse) travisjdahnke SouthPark no. Do not associate me with this. "MotorPunk: Have spent the morning trying to keep up with this lot, enjoying Rutland's b-roads. " TR7Owners: triumph Apprearing ClassicMotorNEC in Nov the earliest production European TR7 known tr7 … ColumWood: This Google car has chrome rims. Get it? "I can't feel my face when I'm with you Cuz I'm havin a stroke" MYSADCAT: My cat is sad because I caught him very shyly practicing an old Irish folk dance in a quiet corner of the garden. … TF2Torrent I got real sick. My apologies. No episode this week. Duran Duran in AP Psych. Your heais a muscle the size of your fist. Kooper. Class. “JMan_Rife: ...what ” BITCHESONMYTOES First F-35 night flight. (via PopSci) Thanks Korio_Lanus ru2213y Retweet everyone and everything so you become all of Twitter. Hello. I just remembered that I have a $1000 account with the local flying service. Hm........ Hey_ItsSunshine (Motivation) This song keeps me driven to succeed. The Fountainhead and Kindergarten Cop. MoeRawi Please take me with you. PersonTheHumann I made music too. I finally used Mac Attack. PersonTheHumann I don't want to. PersonTheHumann You're not a loser bro. You're Charlie Sheen. Juicy J is so smooth. "DYCWTC: Oh goodie, the Busch bros are teaming up to form Douchebag/A-hole Motorsports " Watching Top Gear in study hall. I love my iPhone and Netflix. Glorious. “meesherbeans: Oh my god. This is just beautiful. swtor” My sister wrote a column for the columbiatribune. "extralife: Just got an email where the dude blamed the Kodak bankruptcy filing on ""the gays"". wishiwaskidding" Maybe YOU don't. Autoline: When contrasting stitching isn't enough. BMW 7 series has braided piping. AHHHHH "Libroantiguo: On this day in 1946 John Hersey's ""Hiroshima"" was published in The New Yorker (almost all 68 pages of text space) …" "verge: Driving BMW’s 2016 7 Series: the $81,300 contradiction " LESS THAN 4500 XJs WERE SOLD IN 2014. WHAT ARE YOU PEOPLE DOING? syrupf Golf Unleashed syrupf: yeah but golf with no limits "travisjdahnke if you have a grievance with a purchase or contribution, please contact a representative. " travisjdahnke well done. chancetherapper thanks. chancetherapper: White squad... WARNING: Scotch and Crème brûlée is a HORRIBLE MISTAKE. David Blue thebigkhalifa: hand soap refills for da whole team proud of you. Be obnoxious and studious. corn pics. mayasdreamhouse I've definitely got grandma lips in this pic. Dads Online: What YOU Need To Know John Deere Jorts is going to be the title of my first children's book. Same. 5th cardinal direction - George. "cx1massone: Whoever is doing this to my car , im going to kick your fucking ass . " (Vine by swagnug) mayasdreamhouse viel zu Tabu! Es wird Unruhen sein. speedmonkeycouk indeed. mayasdreamhouse nah. ClickHole: Running Into Your Ex: An Etiquette Guide ClickHole: I Am Coming To Touch Your Computer relateable Peer pressure (Vine by cIaiborne) PersonTheHumann I'll just come there after work again. I do not know what the bingo is. I know only how to swang. Mice Squeeeeek comedy raysipe (Vine by raysipe) Kaliibratiion syrupf what is a bingo. PersonTheHumann I can probably do a thing around midnight Tuesday if you want. Ballaban: Wanna know where Jalopnik is going? Here’s the roadmap. "Chicago, Des Moines this weekend." Evil Disco Boots On Wax "GenreGenerator: the next big thing is ambient glossy punk" I shall go to the grave carrying many bundles. : My body is composed completely of pirated material mayasdreamhouse ???????? eat them. Car & Driver's got the right idea with the archived road tests. Social media ambush. I would absolutely love it. David Blue Oil oh no. MarthaStewart: OiI speedmonkeycouk: Bunch of... mayasdreamhouse ummmmmmmmmmmmm !!!! Whoa! Who is this beautiful woman?! PersonTheHumann not a bad idea. I'm pretty sure I have Facing You and it's not like you won't be able to find it again if you want. "PersonTheHumann it's very good, but you may find it bland." David Blue I can't believe I could be qualified to live. you driven an Optima or Cadenza yet? HappySkyPoodle good evening. WHAT therealautoblog i drivers don't listen to baseball; they don't even know what baseball is. This is how things should be. "Yes, I hacked my ultra-modern city car so I could listen to baseball on AM radio." "therealautoblog: .BMW i3 REx can be hacked to offer more miles, AM radio " ClickHole: How To Compliment Jeremy Renner On Facebook: Video Tutorial "drivingdotca: ""Your passengers will be terrified, but people standing on the curb won’t even notice you crawling by"" …" " food is not a toy, James Wilson." ihaveswineflu: What time is it dril: Perhaps it can also decapitate thieves this way? The new 7-Series can detect rain and will close its windows and sunroof if you've forgotten. I'm sold. beautiful good house. syrupf never enough firearms. mayasdreamhouse we are the future. "ihaveswineflu: ""Stay safe, okay"" -random girl in bathroom downtown ""Do u want to see a pic of my dog?"" -me, always" Daily concept cars only. "HilaryDuff NO. NO. PUT THAT DOWN." stevenewing: It’s perfect. ?? citroen orgamecha I'm too old for this. We're taking the Dawn to Cincinnati next week. Just gotta park the Dawn real quick. Dawn is coming. "therealautoblog: .rollsroycecars sent us some teaser pics to share. Debut is Sept. 8 RRDawn RollsRoyceDawn h…" What if I told you footwork was being played on BBC Radio 1 right now. WilhelmL_CARmag: I recently had the privilege to drive a 190SL for the first time. Full story in the Sep issue of MercEnthusiast http:… "Carscoop: First Diesel-Powered RangeRovers Go On Sale In October In The US From $67,445 " carsdotcom deploy flares. NissanElectric too bad it's not double the range. SAY HELLO TO RUBY SUE kabeebus good car. kabeebus AHHHHHHHHHHH kabeebus: Beep beep is the the giant hand This is honestly the most terrifying tweet I have ever seen. IamBenBarry: And here's the XK150... Freddie Gibbs is such a family man now. It's adorable. 0kbps this is a dang subtweet I just know it. "SPVCEACCOUNTANT there is more food in the world, my friend." PLEASE DON'T TELL THE RUBY SUE ABOUT ME I DO NOT WANT TO GREET THE RUBY SUE ciara_isobel flexin on em. ciara_isobel: This kid deserves endless retweets ???????????????????????????????? no. NO. David Blue "viewsonkbia: A look at the shooting in Roanoke from a new angle. And, journalists facing jail time in the Middle East . …" "Drycast returns tomorrow night at midnight with a new sound, new purpose, and new people." "Class Theory, Explained Nautically" Does anyone REALLY want 500+ hp in a Mako Shark? Like... Do you want to die? Remember buoys? momdelonge I was. I don't like rodents. momdelonge remember the plague? "carsdotcom does it feel like a useful addition, or just a gimmick?" Rodents are not cute. 0kbps properly-trained huskies are very quiet. Boat Bod That bathysphere flex. "Goin 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea on these basics." We flexin in the bathysphere. This dude pulled up to the club in a Bathysphere RapGameShinji Trigger Warning: Bathysphere RapGameShinji Trigger Warning: Submersibles TW: Boats BillysBritain: Up in the air and skirting the weather with ToyotaPR pissboot we're both going to be live on Drycast tonight at midnight. ;) +1 for regulation by journalism over regulation by legislation. Manufacturers are going to hate me; readers are going to love me. This is how it should always be. How does it feel to have a manufacturer shortlink? mayasdreamhouse nah. Just keep doin what you're doin. mayasdreamhouse THIS IS AMAZING. "leighalexander: Hey, this is a fun one: Be a lethal, courtly lady in this RENAISSANCE REVENGE SIMULATOR " TechnoBuffalo: New Moto 360 official! Hands-on with all 3 models "Your Reeboks carry you - swift and true - to the public restroom, where you vehemently urinate in every possible direction." RapGameShinji: AsphaltApostle TW: no trigger discipline NAME? "I was just triggered. And by that, I mean - shot in the face." pissboot remember always. "pissboot you are beautifully perfect, my daughter." pissboot :( IM SWEATIN SO BAD "That being said, DO NOT put a .gif on my gravestone. Thanks." .gifs on gravestones is probably not a ridiculous expectation from the near future. "The dang man at least describes himself as a ""foodist"" instead of a ""foodie."" This is genuine progress." dang yungPOTUS that's vomit you're seeing. :( : Saw this weird bug today. What is it? 0kbps is this literally just a list of nouns. "Drycast is going live in 4 hours with drone news, 7-Series obsession, logo death, and more! " David Blue ciara_isobel there's always the future if you can't tonight. "ciara_isobel we very well may just use Skype tonight, in which case, you will be invited." "I know every single one of you has, but it's up to you whether or not you speak constructively." "Drycast has standards now, believe it or not. Only join if you have something to contribute." travisjdahnke pissboot good boy. travisjdahnke pissboot no. travisjdahnke pissboot just behave yourself. "pissboot Skype is also a possibility. Unfortunately, we have to choose between one or the other." pissboot yes. Can you do teamspeak? That would make it easiest on me. !!!!!! It's Harry Styles post-retirement. David Blue WOW. officialjaden: The Biggest Flex Anyone Will Ever Have Is Dying. LOOK! DennysDiner none of this is useful information. TriplespressoMM: FerrariFriday Hope its sunny where you are. ferrariusa ScuderiaFerrari PebbleConcours TF2Torrent mayasdreamhouse yungPOTUS I'm a big rodent man. travisjdahnke thanks. Drycast episode 39 is LIVE! Drycast live in 5. Changing my name to Stevie Shunt. ammnontet_bot: AsphaltApostle i like posting comments on pictures that i live in portland when i get it i have nothing else to live for SHunt this is incredible. Please message me. I will pay you 3 ears for your username. Thanks. SHunt: Happy New Year to my beautiful children Steven and Ilana and my precious little grandson. Tai....... Love you all very much xxx Drycast's new sound is LIVE in an hour! I can't hear you over my hair. And to think - everyone doubted me. "I'm wearing denim-lined khakis, by the way. My legs are whoopin with glee." I want my legacy to be lots of noise. My hydrogen cell-powered gravestone that shouts at everything. David Blue "BMW: MT juliosmar Isetta in the wild, near a lake. The old lady had her wrinkles, but was in great shape. BMWstories …" David Blue Gaze upon your masters. ciara_isobel breeder. Owl tutorial. What u doin. Audi "Why is ""real jalapeños"" paof the weather forecast?" "The New Sound - Drycast episode 39 is here with mayasdreamhouse, more 7-Series bore, and Social Media thinktankin. " Had to brush my teeth with Chardonnay. :( GRAVEL CATERING. Your mortar is trending. "Forreal, the i8 is 10x more unreal in person." I just attempted to decoupage an i8 and Future cast a dang hex on me. Farewell. MoeRawi Oops cely Thank you! :) Narcissistic douchebag. AWWW THNX BLOGTV "Actually, I meant to say Devongello makes school tolerable." Schumann makes school tolerable. I am now 8 years old. All I do in study hall is read car magazines and sleep. Twitter has become the entirety of my identity. Korio_Lanus: Follow Gnarly Kid schmeankman StevenMandel: If only we all could be as fast actin' as Tinactin. Someone from an actual drywall company likes ihadtopee on Facebook. Google Gobble. BunBTrillOG: Follow me on Instagram. TrillOG I am very smrt. What a horrible idea. As if the wheelbase wasn't already way too small. ru2213y: Scholarship hunting while listening to Lebron Flocka James 3 seems counterproductive. GhettoGeek playing Drywall game. My favorite kind of storm. “GhettoGeek: I'm picking up McDonald's right now. Get ready for a shit storm.” "Broadway Diner, Coffee, and RoadandTrack. Would be perfect of it was 4AM." ThatHappyFeelingYouGetWhen u stay the Huns for another day. :) SHE TELL ME 4 ESPRESSO BUT I TELL HER THEY AINT GOT IT I JUST DROPPED A BUNDLE ON A CARAMEL MACCHIATO LILBTHEBASEDGOD: Goth lives matter!!! GOTH! Emo cuties!!!!!!! - Lil B Bentley Demon. Nofaytes wow. Thanks! Nofaytes: Info Leak!!! We are forever. yzome downtempo eurobeat. Is Justin Timberlake vaporwave? how can you continue this Jive. "Jive Jim, with the beard and the fun." "Is James Wilson actually Jive Jime, from The Little Office?" WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO YOURSELF. George Bunch George Boosh EATING. 0kbps: PEARL JAMES "Loving this new sitcom, ""Coffee Guy!"" (Vine by GabrielDreyfuss) " YahooAnswersTXT: Are there Gamer Girls in Egypt? Stop catcalling and go buy a Rolls-Royce. Stop killing and go buy a Bentley. Stop slut shaming and go buy a Bentley. AsphaltApostle you FIEND. bye bye James Wilson. Have a good time in the heavens. : AsphaltApostle i jsut like to go FAST Seven-segment displays are bae ???? A??????????S???????????C???????E???????????N????D?????????????? 8???? James Wilson is a stock car driver. Fook The Heck Food is stupid. David Blue I just drove a 2007 Jetta like 1000 miles and it was astoundingly enjoyable and competent. "DanBilzerian: Its easier for a camel to go through eye of a needle,than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God-Matt 19:24 http…" buy an old 7-Series Collin. You'd like it the most if you enjoy smoothness. "ThatHappyFeelingYouGetWhen you ascend successfully once more, all the while avoiding the bends AND damage to the bathysphere! :)" "ThatHappyFeelingYouGetWhen you forget to turn the electronic aids off, but have such a smooth line they don't trigger anyway." ThatHappyFeelingYouGetWhen your mechanic can't stop complimenting your refined heat management techniques. LOOK AT THIS. I look look legitimately scary in this photograph. PersonTheHumann gonna be working but I can do things late at night. Some crime type shit. how is this possible. it spring time (Vine by ) PersonTheHumann I have returned. """I dropped out of preschool...because I don't mess around.""" Bow down. David Blue This is why they pay me the big bucks. Brilliant new comparison test idea: new Rolls-Royce Dawn vs. new Mazda Miata. mayasdreamhouse A Man Of Solution ciara_isobel: Tew much """I'm having an emergency. No, it's not my hair.""" """The exhaust pipes reek of carbon and gender.""" THE DAWN IS HERE!!!! "autocar: What do you think of the new Rolls-Royce luxury drop-top? Full gallery of the Dawn here: …" ?????? (Vine by _DowngoesFraser) my uber driver asked if we wanted to listen to his song and I regretfully said yes (Vine by orionnichole) "noobde: Why is 60 frames per second so important? " girl6991: Oh...finally !! Home..sweet hime ?? NalHan7: Hime Sweet Home ?????? daniavio: Hime sweet home AfiqqAimann: hime sweet home. Incredible. ThanksFrank Can you believe Frankie's gonna stop by on his upcoming U.S. visit to be on Drycast?! asuno_mint: Sony: 20 years ago today. PlayStation amazing. mayasdreamhouse I can't believe this. BANKY "NoBadFoods __kay_b_ hoseoksbae _SheSplashed StallionType_ TaayyHarker21 go away, foodists." There was a Quirk in my food at Olive Garden somebody complain. We turnt on content production rn u feel When u have the quirk. CHAD MODE Son of the bitch. nice wordplay. It was definitely the best-looking. I had a first generation iPhone and I think it was my favorite. iOS 1.1 was my shit. He's a silly man. The One Repubic man sounds tired. "I feel like ""Apple Pencil"" is a joke that has been made before." trubIu u health goth. MagRetroPassion: WHAT The new iPhone's available in rose gold $$$$$ because they are Rolls-Royce. Lincoln vs. Identity Thieves it's my favorite. "ijustine: ""Emergency selfie""" ijustine thanks. ijustine: BIG GIF "AutoBant: 10/10 would frame ???? WednesdayWant BMW " AsphaltApostle what a horrible joke. Can you just stop this? I forgot to get apples at the store so I can't watch the live event. Egg. Same. Frank is the best! "My local XJ friend, I see that you are stranded. Can I be of assistance? I will come unarmed." Wex Jeeven Same. helenin: all other news today is worthless garbage: two russian toddlers tunnelled their way out of playgroup to go buy a jag … kabeebus I'll be dead. What the shucks. kabeebus I am 86 years old. orgamecha S H U C K S Aw shoot! time to retire soon. Drycast this week will feature a live baritone saxophone performance! yes. I've had my crisis already. "in the US, anyway." a_nice_frog inspiring. Look at my cute daughter. Who let this man in. mayasdreamhouse good evening. "Lowpolybot: CommonsBot Your picture is ready: angles gradient noedges grain " SirrTmo: Footwork clip from yesterday bustle nice joke. Thanks. Real collegiate men play huge instruments only. The E30 M3 Kenyan children charity. mayasdreamhouse syrupf this is amazing. creaku is that Chris God Damned Pirillo ihaveswineflu is this still about the hair comment. ihaveswineflu: Business casual means blazers w/o shirts """I had no clue there was insurance fan fiction but I want more.""" We in the club tellin parables. David Blue death rattles. syrupf: rap music video cell phones happy for you Collin. "Can you just buy preamps? I wanna combine 3-6 XLR pre-amped channels into an L-R 1/4"" output." Apathy Apogee Used emoji exchange. speedy granddad. RaphaelOrlove: the people are FED UP and TIRED of overtuned fartcrackle exhausts zpower dcseifethanks. MagRetroPassion: "PersonTheHumann exactly. I think variety is the only future for radio but the baby boomers have to die first, unfortunately." Goodbye. OH NO. Strapped. PersonTheHumann KBIA is to classical as Y107 is to hip-hop. I don't think either niche will last tbh. BrotherMob: LIVE on Periscope: I'm lost TURN THE FUCK UP THERE'S A 24-HOUR CLASSICAL STATION COMING TO COLUMBIA "Please, bad rain" KBIA web stream is clipping real hard fam. trubIu school shooting. carsdotcom: 2014-2015 Infiniti Q50 Bad Smell Service trubIu did you cover your face with your phone. Somebody's sitting in the front row in an AC/DC jacket where's security. "The ""I'm about to go out in the rain in a goddamned snuggie but I'm out of time"" look." Models are terrifying. Hate the hats. Please stop with the hats. Is this vaporwave? NYFW a work of art. Wow. Thanks. syrupf get the pencil. 0kbps it's Twitter Christmas. verge: iOS 9.1 will let you send people the middle finger emoji I'm missing my Miata so much I almost want to break my one car-buying rule. ammnontet is this a joke at my expense? "ammnontet: David ""I am actually a car"" Blue" I'm not a real youth though...Evo just makes me feel youthful. That engine note...I miss my NB. TheDanProsser: Shooting this GT86 v MX-5 video was about as much fun as I've had during my 18 months at Evo! htt… TheDanProsser: Does he? The State Farm rapture commercials got me fucked up. pissboot this is adorable. Evo on the new R8. So...the only video on the new R8 you really need to watch. """Did you want cream in your coffee?"" ""Human blood, please.""" C L O D H O P P I N Cofffee_Dad: coffee BOZO I can't believe it's only been two years. yungPOTUS I can see the pain in your eyes. "kabeebus: A maserati pulled up behind me and I whispered ""I'm sorry""" RaphaelOrlove can it actually be tuned into triads like that or is it a purely dynamic thing? BFIrrera BlSCUlTS STAND ON THE ORANGE SPHERE? DO NOT STAND ON THE ORANGE SPHERE?! Jeff is everywhere! looking for woman (Vine by JamesCagewhiTte) Look at how cute this is. My man is a state-of-the-aradar array. Number 5 is dang cute. syrupf it's been like 3 years but I wouldn't consider pianoviolence a dead ajust yet. syrupf cIaiborne it was all those dang shoe videos. KEN BLOCK NAMED HIS HUSKY BENTLEY????!!!! thebestmonkey: My daughter and I went to the zoo for my birthday. She thought the thing behind us was a kitty. Because she's stupid. ht… mayasdreamhouse tell them to visit and donate. trubIu then puts ads in it and capitalize. Scrutiny is wonderful when it pays. trubIu no one listens to podcasts anyway. That's why it's beautiful. trubIu create your own podcast. That's what they're for. mayasdreamhouse this is very important. David Blue orgamecha: the comments are really good on this video "Social media has reduced me to a drooling, shitting, bumbling idiot. All I do at school is Tweet." Need to invest ALL of my fictional money into the Volkswagen group. Yayayayay WeatherBug for iOS' new look. Starting to hate all stimulants now. Including caffeine. My friends don't Tweet enough. I want to see EVERYTHING ABOUT YOUR LIFE PLZ TWEET. Oh wait that's called journalism. Yayayayayayayay I wish I could just be a social media whore for a living. I'd be rich. "RobeSchumann: Kinderszenen, Op. 15 - Kind Im Einschlummern (DUBSTEP REMIX)" "Went to store for food, could only afford dental floss. Currently Saabing." GhettoGeek Uhm. This isn't all of it. "Kid just ran out in front of me trying to get hit. What the fuck, yo?" Consistency is over-rated. ":F ""The pitch correction tool Auto-Tune has been described as the most distinguishable element of music in the 2000s.""" JMan_Rife: People care way too much about what other people think realtalk I DON'T POOP “GhettoGeek: I have 20 demos on my PS3 and 17 demos on my Xbox 360 that I'll probably never play OccupyHardDriveSpace” Good morning. syrupf wow. Thanks! AAHZAWDP98Q7R23098R702398R7N098T734N0928347T0GV2938NT7V I ACTUALLY SCREAMED what? No. What is this? "syrupf: how I beat shaq, lil bow wow's ""basketball"" and the cory in the house theme all don't actually have a bpm of 107" I can smell the bad breath from here. Honda Jazz (Standards Edition) Peep That New Honda Pout TheOnion: Pathetic 4-Year-Old Needs Father To Stand On Merry-Go-Round Platform For Entire Ride … "The Nissan Gripe is coming, folks." MotorTrend: The NissanUSA crossover concept is called Gripz and is inspired by Z cars: IAA2015 … I bought some ladies' deodorant and now I smell like I just ate a tide laundry pod. Ms. Nugget's on another level. what the fuck. who up click clunk guccibraidz u ok fam Where can I go to have my laugh fixed? Thanks. I am eating food. When u eating. I eat. When u CONSUME. THE ONION. Drycast is going LIVE in 10 MINUTES! David Blue Petersen_Museum: This video makes waking up at 4:00am look good. I see a Nina! Millionaire Wipes "Drycast episode 40 is going LIVE in 4 hours with townie fashion week spittle, the new Rolls, and smelly sedans. " 0kbps 0kbps 0kbps lots of software amps. actually it's 2 hours before our cast so I'll be able to watch! GoodwoodRevival period immersion should be enforced with lethal weapons. where's the stream ? that was a joke don't be mad. WHAT THE SHOOT. Now Drycast is going to be competing for your viewership. We have to coordinate these things. USGS that man is in a hole. "TheHooniverse: The Carchive: The ’93 Lancia Thema " I've just caused so much high-fashion vomiting. Thanks. Petition to make the GoodwoodRevival officially paof NYFW. Thanks. I can't handle Goodwood right now....I can't. Can you please reschedule? Thanks. syrupf amazing. please come on Drycast tonight. I want to hear you lay into the new Rolls. When u. Wicked noises were made in Studio Eat last night. Drycast episode 40 is now available to stream and download! LISTEN TO THIS motorator: Some amazing Ferraris racing at GoodwoodRevival JPGglitchbot: CommonsBot Glitched for you: "marieclaire: Yes, yes, YES. Loving everything at RalphLauren. ??: Jessica_Pels " me every day. ChuckTingle: BING SEARCH how do i meet a kind man without my wifes ghost screaming in my ear like grinding marbles? they're great. kabeebus: AsphaltApostle I got the perfect pic of you staring down the proles you made the other band look like trash. I was hootin and hollerin. Drycast is gonna be late getting up today - ISP's down. Will happen before early afternoon though. Drycast is back after a break! AHHHHHh dysrexia ???? E ok have fun! " come on Drycast, daughter." nope. Skype: DepravedInfant Drycast episode 40 is LIVE. This is important. "Blonde combover, pink polo, white Mini, ginger ale, unironic use of the word ""snazzy."" Much respect." What did I do. I downloaded this game but I'm not very good at it. trubIu David Blue Good evening. NYFW NYFW creaku BIG. ciara_isobel cool mom. mayasdreamhouse OH MY GOD. !!!! trubIu when's the film coming out. trubIu it's cool as heck. Your style sense is really unique. trubIu the 90s park-dwelling tourist dad look. trubIu how do you do this. trubIu huge cheek boy. ammnontet: AsphaltApostle on second thought everything game ridiculous look at this shit. good god ammnontet: AsphaltApostle brow game ridiculous I'm almost a real youth sometimes. clock_hater WHOO! Hairband review. Become an Inmunis contributor! "clock_hater they're store-branded shit. Unfortunately, I have experimented little." clock_hater need to find a tailored brushed aluminum hair collar. clock_hater yup. Just a plastic headband. I go through like 3 a week though because my hair breaks them. Pleasant drive. travisjdahnke intolerance cave. Be hoppin. Good listicle. travisjdahnke criticism is the ultimate creator and spreader of ideas. "mayasdreamhouse it's all for the sake of entertainment, though. It's anti-art." "I don't mean to portray it as some kind of revolution, but I have to take the opportunity when I have insight this valuable." mayasdreamhouse I told you I was crazy in high school. even if it is a bit rough around the edges. "Driving a K900 over its competing German entries indicates savvy progress, cultural awareness, and intelligence" What needs to be recognized about truly contemporary youth - they don't care about brands. It's all about what's high-value and smart. "It's acceptable for the laymen to speak this way, still, but for those with a professional on the industry, it's just silly." "I understand your more traditionalist audiences and advertisers love the language, but it's time to pull an Ed Loh and educate them." "Eds, Your writers are out of touch. I'm a potentially limitless asset. daviddrywall.ws" "Either columnists need to stop saying ""I can't believe it's a Kia,"" or hire me. I moved on 5 years ago." """My momma ain't raise no hoe."" - Fred Child" "I've greedily kept it hidden for years, but we'll be releasing these codes for the first time on Drycast this Friday " : A demonic entity that announces its presence through the smell of freshly cut grass David Blue We're making our debut as a vine couple. "Drycast UPDATE: Ep. 41 - 3 health folk with discussion on coordination and nutrition Ep. 42 - Pope Frank's stopping by + Logan's Law." 3DThrills hello. 3DThrills: Don Sherman Testifies I'm the Alex Jones of auto journalism and I have decreed that globalism is here. Quad-core gas pump controllers are mining Bitcoin right now. Now watch me whoop. Shunt off. trubIu a huge shout. syrupf a_nice_frog wait what who is the birthday girl. trubIu a concise bout. trubIu a speedy debate. Human 3.0 Hello. travisjdahnke *deafening jingling* 0kbps: running the jewels with my woes trubIu you want me to have a little sit-down with her? A CHAT? They are not throwing the ball fast enough. clock_hater Inmunis hungers for everything. Very sad to see so much R&D money going into electric drivetrains instead of hydrogen. "AutoExpress: Amongst all the VW Group metal at Frankfurt, Mercedes has revealed the IAA Concept. More here- http…" RoadandTrack: It's *virtually* the next Bugatti Veyron. theseoldcars: Get the latest from the Frankfumotor show here: via autocar IAA IAA2015 … "hashtagoras: My ""are they reading the syllabus?"" easter egg has yielded quantitatively dismal results but is still paying off. …" "Like...the origin story is shit, square faces are stuffy, and the numerals are just gross in 2015." Is it a sin that I've never really liked the Cartier Tank or the pieces it's inspired? Promotion Via Social Media 101 FUCK I've been listening to this album for nearly a year and it hasn't yet ceased to stir the most nightly parts of me. """activated bluefish"" scared me away from the whole thing." Thank you. travisjdahnke was thinking about having a recurring WWII segment on Drycast with RapGameShinji. clock_hater this is absolutely essential because my hair is very stubborn. clock_hater forgot to mention that I always make sure it's in a band when it dries so its shape is biased away from my face. thewaybot: I like it when people critically grade my essays. loliliberator: AsphaltApostle the forbidden fruit will fall from the tree I'm pretty sure I've broken my iPhone's front camera's ability to focus which really gives this photo the right flavor. "Live improv piano stream happening. Could be genius, could be awful. Good luck. " Piano stream or nah EMPATHY BUTTON drew: Google+ Failed Due To Lack Of Empathy Buttons David Blue HIS NAME IS ADAM The college freshman starter pack. Double the engagement rate of the original. "Nofaytes the silent curse was ""oh pee.""" ClickHole: Thank a bus driver today! ClickHole: 10 Things You Should Never Say To A Pregnant Woman I'm wearing a purple polo & laughing at NPR in a silver Jetta. Please do not hume. "welovehonda: Berhubung bangun kepagian, sekalian langsung berangkat kerja deh, mau nikmatin jalanan yang sepi tanpa macet brosis! http:…" ghettocnn: Getting ready to watch Bidden Palin Debate 2008 YtThumbnails: HectorLives trubIu you may think you're original but I was making this joke before you were born. ihaveswineflu: Hey California u big dumb idiots y don't u check the ocean next time u complain about a drought David Blue trubIu let them kill each other. "whereas hydrogen fuel cells are like nearly 100% efficient, resource-unlimited, and have 0 harmful emissions." that's exactly why it's a pity - battery technology will always be shit. Adrianbird01: MartiniMonday this is as rare as rocking horse ?????? see it yesterday Papal PayPal Pal Remember COFFEE CRUD? Wow. Thanks! ISIS is burning pianos in Syria? Can anyone mic that for me? Thanks. yungPOTUS Frank's my papal pal and he's stopping by studio eat on his U.S. visit next week. Why don't you ask him on Drycast? ClickHole: does that representation of an Alpaca have bowel movements? "yungPOTUS the head of the Catholic Church, you peasant." PersonTheHumann probably not gonna be available until Drycast. Big work stuff going down. ???????????? Alpacas are not cute. Alpacas are not something to celebrate. David Blue Very excited for Frank. I signed up for sign language classes and they got really mad when they found out I have no hands. Ford Taurus shot glasses. [indie country song begins playing] RapGameShinji of course! Always cover that one. RapGameShinji my last stream was waaaay better but it was mono and I looked insane. RapGameShinji I really need to be way more sleep deprived to actually be good. "Wasn't that bad, actually." Nofaytes: Inmunis AsphaltApostle ihadtopee CalebMenichelli TKCs PaI: Purge final draft is here. … hmu if the audio has issues. RapGameShinji Aaaaaaaaaaaaa "Tomorrow, Health Hell on Drycast! :)" BUGATTI WITH A CASSETTE PLAYER THIS THING. akiba_k3i: I LIKE BIG BRAKES AND I CANNOT LIE CyberEveryword: ????????? Lamborghini: LIVE on Periscope: Live from IAA2015: the HuracanSpyder """mind the thigh gap"" - me if I ever went to Olive Garden." Effective Inventory Bae SPVCEACCOUNTANT impressive. ClickHole: 8 Ways To Eat More Eco-Friendly A1GOY the electric effect? ammnontet I read in USB 3.0. ammnontet: . ammnontet: "alli_elder ""swagger wagon"" was a Toyota Sienna thing, though I only mentioned it to appear witty and cultured. Carry on." "alli_elder wrong manufacturer, I'm afraid." "How very amusing that society is still ""shocked"" when Protestant Christians act on their EXPLICITLY STATED and WIDELY KNOWN prime directive." ammnontet: The active youths are moving too quickly - I can't see them. ZhugeEX: My new Dynasty Warriors custom controller has arrived- Bird Strike on a 757 captured on video. Can't stop watching. "Errytime we hit the parkin' lot, we TURN HEADS." Happy birthday rickastley. Forgot to wear my shitoday. Damnit. Aztek Cabriolet. This cartoon is about me. Gave in and bought Left 4 Dead 2 with money I should've used for Valentines Day/Anniversary gifts. "Korio_Lanus: Dad has seen They Live, and the Thing (original and 1980's remake). I have newfound respect for this man" Night driving in the rain playing Schumann. Wish this could be repeated more often. Anti-Sinewave Party I'm now on Steam. OH MY GOD I think Ashkenazy just MISSED A NOTE. 1 note out of 7 hours of insanely difficult/unusual piano = horrible pianist. RobeSchumann's spirit needs to possess Keith Jarrett's fingers. Photo: Lawlasaurus Sanity and decency are over-rated. DavidKlazz: RETURN OV DA COMO HUSTLAZ PAIII NIGGA COP THIS SHIT BEST SHIT WE'VE DONE YET ru2213y I didn't. But I guess I'll play anyway. Yay. ru2213y Downloading now. But I can't play tonight. ru2213y ru2213y ru2213y Not enough wasted time. I want MMO. ru2213y It's still the best Free to Play MMO there is. Not that that's saying much. Star Trek Online is now free on Steam. DavidKlazz: RETURN OF THE COMO HUSTLAS PAIII TODAY WITH DEVONGELLO FUCKING GOOD MUSIC PRETTY CRICKET NIGGA WITH ROBINS ON MY DICK ... Captain Hyperbole Jumpsuit swag. marriage_txt: Fuck it! Im so gay! Im fucking ga "marriage_txt: If you say yes, it will Quench my thirst." David Blue "g0m: me: say a big number. millenial: DUHHhhh... 10. can i have a participation trophy now duhh Wise 37 year old [smiling serenely]: On…" Rubber-strapped SevenFriday-wearing RayBan Ass. Intolerable Collegiate Mechanotroll Quick Campus Cunt I want to do it all over again. I want to get scholarships and a Fiesta ST. RoadandTrack: Rolls Royce will build an electric car if batteries become good enough. What is a muffin. "Movie idea: ""Little Brown Book,"" starring Norm, the warehouse manager turned fantasy author with big dreams. He dies." "I just drank this, crashed a CR-X into K-Mart, and lost my Duran Duran cassette. Please help. " travisjdahnke holy shit. travisjdahnke I can hear the melody. I don't think I'll ever stop laughing. ihaveswineflu: How many pockets does it take to make up for the fact that u r wearing khaki ihaveswineflu: Hand me ur crossbow I see someone in a bow-tie my job is to have lots to say about cars I'll never be able to afford. Why would you ever buy a Veyron when you could have this for half the price? Two quirky old new English men with lots of shouting to do! Shouting in your ears wherever you go! Good programming! virgyvirgil ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????? virgyvirgil: AsphaltApostle Big QUIRK What if MOPAR sold body mods? Good to know. Thanks. travisjdahnke trans-humanist art. travisjdahnke gmail ninja ClickHole: Hard to believe that jk_rowling was once rejected. Crazy! (Vine by cedrick66) Ye olde SM57 knockoffs. I'll explain more later. Hello. Hippie Hitler And IT'S NOT NUMBERED??!!!! I'm going to be releasing a piano album that has way more of the stuff my playing usually gets criticized for. Good. Who's been going through my god dang vine account? Has anyone ever been killed in a car accident by a flying Kindle. OurEdisons actually I think we're probably gonna be going back to teamspeak. marriage_txt: For Gym Membership. marriage_txt: marry me mothuerfucker JODYHiGHROLLER thanks. BOOM Drycast Drycast LIVE IN 5! Drycast Episode 41 is going LIVE in 30 minutes! David Blue Drycast is now starting at 8PM CST because I made the mistake of eating some annoying food and now I have to bathe. "there is really no ""American"" in the auto industry anymore. Everybody on Earth swaps parts." "124 deaths have been ""linked"" to GM's ignition issues." U pull up bumping future with your 11s but I'm bumping kye rysdal through my 15s and u can't hear shit. NoBugs2016 """How'd u even die from that dude lol"" - David Blue, GM CEO" The old me would be immediately amused by 124 deaths tied to ignition problems. The new me is just tremendously confused. Have I ever mentioned that I love my car? thank you this is...huge. therealstylesp: Are there any diesel vegans?? verge: Concorde may fly again by the end of the decade Heaven. vergecars: Google's little self-driving cars are now roaming the streets of downtown Austin … Yes. Very exciting. WHAT An intelligent boy! A handsome boy! A boy of many talents! And he loves to pose for photos. trubIu trubIu is this a joke at my expense? Driving a GM vehicle within the ignition switch recall right now? This episode of Drycast will save your life. Sustenance makes nearly 5 hours of David Blue piano improv on the net (excluding the streams.) A time capsule...A piece of history... I am adding this to my wishlist please buy me all the available used copies thank you. Three Doors Grace 0kbps 0kbps: kind of crazy how texas is the biggest country in the world it was like 3 packets of food sauce and 2 pre-packed bags of trash dude - no bother at all. LILBTHEBASEDGOD L1LDebbie how do you folks feel about pocket watches? IGN GameStop Walmaavgn Drycast is now revealing SECRET Gaming Cheats LIVE on the stream. JOIN US IMMEDIATELY BMW and CollinP just arrived in a black SL. Drycast is getting serious. The inventor of the lightbulb gives his take on contemporary hip-hop: Only on Drycast! ciara_isobel saved Drycast. We're gonna take a quick vaporwave break. When we return: Thomas Edison on tuner underglow. OurEdisons we're in Skype at the moment but we'll probably be moving. "humansofny: ""I turned my wife into a meme."" " whiteandfaded: Love wins?? orgamecha: david blue David Blue This was a serious request. CyberEveryword: ????????????? "trubIu impressive, Dad." CreatorsProject: Filmmakers built a scale model of the solar system in the desert: reporter_e: Good morning everyone! It's final race day. Weather is slightly cloudy. Where the Audi convention at? The A8 driver didn't even get out. "Black 2015 model A4, A6, AND A8 all pull up. ""I'm going on break.""" """You lost?"" " Dorothy. "Egg Day, brought to you by The Shouting Teeth." Can anyone tell me what melody this is? Very good Vine Video. no I hope it's fucking destroyed. "Drycast begins and ends with parenting this week. Between? Surge, Shrek Superslam, Balloon Bashing and Gay Hitler. " 0-?? Quite Briskly Lifted. driversside: LINCOLN Continental concept at Dayton Concours d'Elegance ToyotaRacing: Happiness is a fast Camry for TheChase. ChaseHappiness toopoor_: BITCH GON STEP ON MY FUCKIN TOES????? YES!!!!! I showed your mom and she yelled a lot! !!!!!! Rifled exhausts are so silly. JebBush: Sorry Mom This was not a joke. """We can't get married until you've listened to the whole DJ Screw discography.""" everyword: big "MinecraftSigns: Waoh, ruins of an old house...  I wonder who lived here..." C O N T E N T trubIu just forget the whole thing. trubIu you could probably get grants to research this in college. trubIu how very insightful. Wow. It's time to stop. What if I told you I'm writing a blog about E. Skrillex: E """And his eyes have all the seeming of a demon’s that is dreaming, And the lamp-light o’er… " "What is bingo, really?" David Blue "Please come back, TVR." "This seems to be a norm. Perhaps the next big bad CEO caught in the act should say something to the tune of ""lol.""" "Nearly $40,000/unit fine possible for VW. How much diesel equipment does the military operate again? " lucem_22: SundayScenario AutoBant ?? "ThomasdeSaulieu: for me it' going to be this one ... 2 kids 2 dogs LeahRebeccaUK BoitierRouge " LOOK. Heaven is a place on Earth. """Who's idea was this?"" - Maya, on menstruation." colevitiritto: Squad ?? jimmer4_3: Wait what's a Gronk? Des Moines is like the Dad capital. Share precise location. "OurEdisons I won't go into too much detail, but I have taken measures to ensure that Drywall Media will outlive me." Buy Iowan War Bonds. OurEdisons I'M GOING HOME AT LAST. I can't believe I'm in heaven. Infrastructure babe. "I'm a train slut, tbh." "I'm a slut for large, effective grain elevators." TalkLikeAPirateDay I'm hungry and cold. cliklyk: baby boomers: technology is ruining this generation also baby boomers: here my child daisy sour cream you are only 4 yrs old h… Today is my last day with my hair. businessinsider: The '90s were just as good as the '60s — via Telegraph shelbyfero: Never bring a wife to a gun fight. an academic monopoly on curiosity. A man was confused that I'm interested in classical music and not a music major. What a horrible thing. yzome ah yes. A joke. David Blue ciara_isobel where are the Thai minion memes. quick. ciara_isobel I can't believe this. ciara_isobel this is the end. ciara_isobel I'm going to cry today. You've made me cry. ciara_isobel no. Please no. Thank you. I thought the Nick Rochefomarriage thing was a joke. The Iowa snapchat story - glimpses of heaven. "audipenny: How to politely leave anything: -I have to go, I just found out nothing -oh no I'm not real anymore -ugh sorry my sky horse …" bodybuildinga7: - Give Up "bodybuildinga7: Everybody getting engaged, married or having babies...Im just over here trying to get some abs & a booty." Probably because it has a theme. What began as an experiment may just very well be the best record I've ever done. it was lurking outside a fucking Which Wich in a Des Moines suburb. Matte blue with blue-accented wheels. "If I saw this on the street, I would begin running the other way immediately. This is not an exaggeration. " Good God. Sentreh nope. I wake up every morning at 6:01 to hammer it out. THIS is real dating advice. PersonTheHumann I'm in KC atm. trubIu yungPOTUS yes. RIP mihmnop not an efficient use of brake pads or gasoline. David Blue Dan Neil is good. TheOnion: Pope Francis Reverses Position On Capitalism After Seeing Wide Variety Of American Oreos … archillect: Frank is here! We got in trouble for this. Goodbye. The best couples remind each other to save often. My college application got rejected because I don't have enough Tweets smh lamp_head ah ok. Can you just send me a box? I can't go to the post office anymore because my car keeps eating the workers. lamp_head does this ritual involve lamps? ": Im hosting a new NPR show called Wait, Wait Don't Fire Me!" conner_omalley: Pope acting strange...?? pissboot captainfuckwit 0kbps this was a Drycast thing. scion love my Scion! "MomMilitia regular car reviews is pretty close to this, actually." This is my best Tweet. MomMilitia: future of auto journalism: man wearing gopro riding a motorcycle 100mph through the Chicago auto show pointing at cars and … Frank. PersonTheHumann not this week - obligations in the early mornings. Tryna make some extra $$$ but things will settle down eventually. David Blue ciara_isobel what is he reading. bailableposts: Fall clothes ???????? They're so cute! snavEwerdnA the end of everything. PersonTheHumann yeah but I'm gonna be working until Friday. Big Jim kabeebus PersonTheHumann ah AH. IM GOING TO OPEN FIRE kabeebus PersonTheHumann it seriously causes me physical pain when people say that. kabeebus PersonTheHumann it's the end. PersonTheHumann kabeebus LOOK AT THE TEXT ON THE FUCKING WHEELS. nytimesworld: China asks U.S. tech companies to pledge commitment to policies that could require them to turn over user data. … Lawlasaurus "One of the most encouraging comments on my YouTube videos: ""I'm 63, and I think you have a future.""" Just saw a dude my age driving an E34 M5. Jealous as shit. So many dudes at The Candy Factory. GhettoGeek ihadtopee is a great matchmaker. Just sayin'. "radiodede: Adele..another artist like Whitney who can still sell records without using sex, overly sexy clothing or dancing nasty! J ..." "PersonTheHumann Actually, it's probably so we don't just scream and make stupid clipping noises on voice chat." PersonTheHumann I can't log in to Steam either. The amount of love you put into your vehicle is directly proportional to how much it will return. The best paabout having my own vehicle is being able to go get some fucking Froot Loops when I feel like it. Forgoing eating so I can afford an anniversary gift. Why did I have to miss disco? 13th Floor/Growing Old silenced my music class. I think I'm gonna have to go back on Adderall. I have no more motivation to produce anything. All I want to do is play shitty video games. GhettoGeek Sorry. TTF or I GTFO My sister's column. Swag. "I find it ridiculous when people use the phrase ""the little things"". Little things have little meaning." Kinda miss walking through the beach surf at sunset listening to Atliens at the moment. People are such animals. "The multicultural assembly was just a Jesusfest. Not much ""multi"" at all." Mayday calls are horrifying. WORLD'S BIGGEST EMAIL! syrupf: Don't delete the Internet. Internet 10 Hope yall ready for web 5.0. "syrupf should've better specified the nature of my contact request, I suppose." DieselArmy DieselMilitia dieselgate The dieselgate thing is sickening. I would very much like to roll coal straight into an EU building right now. " ""wow, cute car! We won't be seeing them again.""" mikespin: Two great minds of VW Group may resign over dieselfuk but millions of people who jam napkin dispensers with too many napkins … speedmonkeycouk: Remember the battle royale between VW and Porsche over who was going to take over who? Seems Porsche won in the end ht… speedmonkeycouk what a mess. amazing. Jeff. speedmonkeycouk shoulda seen that one coming. "The Leaf is very cute. Unfortunately, it's electric. " NissanUSA: !!!!!!!!!!! NationalPunctuationDay silerroad: The Blue Oval takes on comical dimensions on the grille of the 2017 SuperDuty pickup. Ford fseries… … gohoppo: andro Munari & Piero Sodano racing up the mountains in their Lancia Stratos HF - Monte-Carlo in 1978. Lancia WRC … : real hours hours if you are a system of time measurement click like ": *gets attacked by a pack of wild dogs as i leave for work* gee, i sure do hate mondays" problackpoet: When you know the truth and you've unlearned all the lies you were taught in elementary and middle school. … "jonnysun: LAWYER: [whispers] i did the murder [loudly] read that back? STENOGRAPHER: ""I Did The Murder."" JUDGE: omg the stenographer ju…" that's ok. The Pope is stopping by and he'll fill up the whole studio! "ah. That's much more appropriate, honestly." are you going to spend valuable birthday time on Drycast tonight? "Sentreh a bit different, I think. Shot digitally and written much better." "Apparently, the first Mad Max was overdubbed with American-accented voice actors for the U.S." "0kbps: main twitter: piss in my mouth private twitter: piss in my mouth but unironically" Nofaytes: Check out Nofaytes A. Rysing's fundraising page for National Novel Writing Month on … David Blue VW: Update from Volkswagen regarding the EPA investigation: Jalopnik: How Honda got an Impala to meet EPA regs when GM said it couldn't be done Frank is dirty. Too many people like to touch him. SaveThePlanetIn4Words cease human reproduction immediately. APPLE NEWS IS MY SHIT Pee II. FRANK IS GOING TO BE ON DRYCAST TOMORROW OH MY LAWD! Please hit me with a train. a Lexus dealership should look like an extremely modern maximum-security prison. Review of iOS 9.0.1 on outdated hardware. Pee. Wow. " yes but promotion is the ultimate way to defeat a conversation that's making you uncomfortable, trust me." orgamecha no. just tell him to visit and donate. """Is David Blue here?"" ""Yes."" ""Do you have another name you'd like to be called by?"" ""Piss."" ""Okay, thanks.""" kabeebus Bringer of Stonewashed Suffering Nice joke. :( The shipwreck twerk. The shipwreck tweak. The Funniest Real Estate Blog In The World. "kabeebus please, no. M" BrandonMiniman: Huawei watch I love you ClickHole: This One Comic Perfectly Sums Up What It’s Like To Live With Depression "kabeebus ""dat"" Silver Cloud ""dough.""" kabeebus what have you done. Drycast is going LIVE with Pontifex in just 8 hours! PopeinUS PopeFrancis PopeinNYC PopeInPhilly "craisinmami trubIu LET THE ORB DOWN, SLOWLY." : Every day is casual friday IN HELL CHRIST. Drycast is LIVE! "LIVE on Drycast in 5 MINUTES! Self-publishing, Boehner Boys, dieselgate, giant lizards, and Pontifex HIMSELF!!! " MarcusWohlsen omw. you can talk about John Boehner while you're grinding. It's a unique opportunity to meet the Pope. Collin if you join Drycast via teamspeak tonight I'll let you touch the original Roobie Phawls 2012 demo tape + Kia gift bag. 0kbps: 0-100 reasonably fast "StarJoyThePoet such an awful middle name entitles me to some sinning, I think." StarJoyThePoet I should've kept my secret. Drycast is going live at the top of the hour and YOU CAN JOIN US. David Blue "yes, it was only a joke." autobabbler: Order online before 4pm for next day delivery straight to your front door modern terrorism drivingdotca: Will we ever understand the relationship between cars and watches? Big Uncomfortable Butt Cadillac: An expressive angle. The 2016 ATS Coupe. PeripateNic: UKIP supporters yet again showing how dim they are. This woman got a tattoo of a young Ian Beale for some reason. … Who In The Fuck Is Ian Beale Please Go Away ammnontet quebution tantittius amazing. Probably 8PM. His Holiness won't be by until 11:30. Who to heck. orgamecha nice Nas Illmatic joke. Look at your goddanged Twitter analytics right now. wake up & EAT. a_nice_frog: Here is my remix of So Anxious souljaboy Drycast has RETURNED. Gonna give any prospective Drycast guests till midnight to show up before I do the rest solo! Go here -> "travisjdahnke get that lookbook up, fam." """Take this. Go somewhere poor and colorful. Showcase the damned device. Get it done in 7 days or else."" - Apple " Miss the stream? Don't worry! It's now available on YouTube! ryandeel thanks Mr. Dell I am really hot now. LIVE on Periscope: Drycast LIVE PRE-SHOW WORKOUT Drycast is going to take a break but we'll be back in just a few! SOOT RUNE trubIu we're in the teamspeak at this very moment. "MinecraftSigns: Jerome is that        you?!" runjewels PopeinNYC runjewels: recurringsegment virgyvirgil 0kbps: drivign around my Nice honda car with 200k miles on it AMERICANMADE 0kbps ihaveswineflu cool boat! trubIu Drycast! David Blue yaperboi: white ppl love that sweet Caroline song Honk. Where are trains II caityweaver: Unbelievable....This fuckin' cat made a sign...JUST TO BRAG!!!! Life hack: BIG OurEdisons USAlady21 MvnUtd Pontifex Oprah: tpaymnyhn MotorTrend: LIVE on Periscope: The racetrack is HOTTT at Porsche Rennspo5!!! Group 4 Weissach Cup! "Dieselgate, rule 34, self-publishing, Bentley's future, Rose Gold corrections and WWIII Drycast Episode 42 is here! " Sentreh THE most iconic scene in a Drywall film to date. You've never seen such big emails before. Beautiful piano. lmfao hes crazy (Vine by Collin__P) "guccibraidz be careful, there is a loaf there." what about oatmeal? we're going to DIN. Will you join? MotorTrend: LIVE on Periscope: Helicopter ride around RennsportReunionV! very insightful. Being trans is edgy? This is just... "TF2Torrent 8PM CST Friday, October 2nd, 2015." "akiba_k3i: ""I have no idols. I admire work, dedication and competence."" - Ayrton Senna, 1992 " """Please stop benchmarking. Thanks.""" "officialjaden: If I Had A Nickel For Every Time I've Cried In The Back Of An Uber, I Would Have Another Pair Of Yeezy's." eyedeeuhs: best vine of all time. colesprouse: :) "colesprouse: lol, help tho " :( your mother and I are here if you need anything. " are you ok, daughter?" "NissanID: Dari pilihan ini, mana yang akan Anda lakukan saat liburan kali ini? A. Jalan-jalan di Mall B. Menonton tv C. Tidur …" Cybercryptobotany "pissboot clearly, Tyler enjoys cryptology!" What hecking. sixfourimpallah 0kbps what is happening. guccibraidz mom?! boys too big - block moon tonight. boys are BIG. Will I love chip? Thanks. hostile_goose: shut the fuck off This is why I stay inside when the Subaru people stahootin and hollerin about upcoming local events. An extremely apt 6-second summary of Columbians. creaku good phone water. Gary: Tank Commander PersonTheHumann K I L L GET YOUR CLUBS OUTTA MY CAsame This is absolutely terrifying. Lindsay's still alive! "Jony ive parody I play roblox and do parody apple stuff I'm the best Fucking designer I hate Samsung (parody not really Jony Ive)" creaku cool water. """emboldened"" ""ignite"" ""hack the culture"" PISS." """When I'd dress up as an Amish woman and go to tech conferences...to make them think.""" guccibraidz Nugget too hot. Please turn it down a bit. orgamecha thanks. "big clock sentinel BIG HEAVY TIME MAN " I want Jim Gordon's apartment holy pee. incredible. what in Ka's name is that. Look at this animal. 0kbps: just get a dang app. macklemore: Fuck GUBLERNATION: IT'S FINALLY FALL AND I'M DRESSED LIKE A CORDUROY ACORN. photo by SWAN_SON GUBLERNATION: taking a break at the gym from my vigorous cardiovascular routine David Blue alexdnz: Who let Ubisoft program Florida? PREACH! SmithsonianMag how could you do this. kabeebus how did we end up like this? I'm not even drunk...I'm just a big tree man. I'm a big tree man. travisjdahnke I'm warming up my feet! syrupf: BANKROLL BIRD travisjdahnke no. I'm a bad boy. trubIu 393838205010304271940431949392 OurEdisons ushjdjshcushj The moment FUCK. "In 2011, I was hired by the Central Intelligence Agency to maintain a steady output of disinformation to confuse the American public." travisjdahnke Oprah please. eat. David Blue ciara_isobel is it cold there? SAME. AsphaltApostle pissboot Ford Could I live in a Fiesta ST? BarberaLoyd: do gay people only tweet is that their job Man. I want to be a xenomythologist. I guess we should find some aliens first. PersonTheHumann hey_itssunshine I'm gonna go ahead and adopt that as an accurate representation of all STL hip hop. Photo: Windows 95 instruction DVD with Jennifer Anniston and Matthew Perry. I NEED THIS. "Photo: Will Smith playing Nintendo in a backwards hat, on a zebra rug, wearing Nike Air’s, zoomba pants, and... " Dude Scott Bakula is from St. Louis. I had no idea. KOMUnews: Honor Flight Riders Want to Create World Record: Rapmonster: i think im wayne bieber... thats the name of my new song This tape is actually making me physically ill. 40 TRACKS AND 2.5 HOURS OF YOUNG MONEY BILLIONAIRES I'M LISTENING TO ALLLLLLLLLLL OF IT Hay gurl. I wonder what Scott Bakula's burps sound like. Reading James Baldwin and Ayn Rand at the same time is interesting. Their philosophies aren't as different as you might think. I wish I could take my African American Literature class for the rest of my life. 50th Anniversary of Mercury Orbital Flight. $315 ain't worth your soul. Hey_ItsSunshine Dude Beemo is phosho my favorite. Adorable. JMan_Rife Not enough. "Man, if you're married, don't have kids. Two people with full-time jobs renting an apartment can save soooo much money." PowerRag "Rapmonster: True love and a good marriage involve a lot of fighting, not serenity." Rapmonster: Find what you like and let it kill you I'd just like to thank Jay for still sleeping in my room despite my getting up at 4:15 on Wednesday mornings. cher: cher hi only if you pay me back with ad revenue from the youtube videos of it running like an idiot. what. Photo: royalindulgence: watchanish: Arnold & Son HM Perpetual Moon on the…... Photo: !!!!!! itcrowe: train to chicago ?? bodybuildinga7: ?Single bodybuildinga7: ? Without love. bodybuildinga7: ? Football bodybuildinga7: ? Volleyball bodybuildinga7: ? We feel nothing. bodybuildinga7: To Do List: bodybuildinga7: ? Golf bodybuildinga7: ? Basketball bodybuildinga7: why bodybuildinga7: o no fast food! trubIu I'm not even drunk. 0kbps: I'M LAUGHING BECAUSE MY TWITTER NAME ON ONE OF MY ACCOUNTS IS FUCK AND IT SENT IT LIKE THIS I'll show you my feet if you bring big food to my house. travisjdahnke no They wiggle all night and it's real noisy... Please help me. My thighs are getting too big. to become mediocre? guccibraidz Nug Life BlKINl: Revelation: The Model S is not special anymore. happyfunyuns thanks mom I know you just want what's best for me. happyfunyuns big berry boys? travisjdahnke THE TINY MAN IS IN MY HAND. BIG MOVIE TINY MAN. travisjdahnke is it bad? happyfunyuns sorry. Fucking Berry happyfunyuns hello. plangeypants: Where are the black people? I'm in my Fucking Raspberry outfit. happyfunyuns you're lying. I don't have a mom. I grew on a fuckin vine. colesprouse I've been making this argument for decades. This is called using fame for a good cause. colesprouse: Skipping is not only enjoyable but it's also an extremely efficient and quick way to get around. NormalizeSkipping colesprouse: ~~~whisper suite nothings into my ear~~~ happyfunyuns thanks. arjunprabhuk: JBWEyesonroad -- live streaming... some guy from the event "colesprouse: damn kid, get some sleep. " 2b8ab34717da42e cliklyk this is some soof food information I don't understand. I'm sorry. cliklyk: this is literally a clickhole post luke................... its not that deep David Blue Snowden: Can you hear me now? ah. He is a Big Law Boy. 0kbps holy shit account 0kbps: twitter shit tell him to watch Honk instead! David Blue PURCHASE. BUY. Wow. Thanks. Somebody painted over a church's black lives matter sign in St. Louis. officialjaden: Chemtrails. "CARmagazine: Live from ModelX Tesla world debut: hands-free doors, safest SUV on sale, bio-weapons a/c! http:/…" "MotorTrend: TeslaMotors ModelX Falcon wing doors need only 12"" to open. Ultrasonic sensors change arc to make sure they no hit. http:…" "HannahElliott: Model X can tow 5,000 pounds; carry 7 people. Musk is giggling he's so proud...." "HannahElliott: There is also a ""bioweapon defense mode"" in the Tesla Model X. For real. You know, just in case. Has something to do wit…" Renuks: Traffic cop and car cutouts to deter motorists from speeding. greatquattrodrive China AudiIN ChrisWoodyard: Check out how TeslaMotors doors work in modelx The Model X is cute as heck. CARandDRIVER: 2016 Tesla Model X: Tesla's Electric Crossover Finally Spreads Its Wings - Official Photos… http:/… "the Model S was never intended to be pedestrian. It's a luxury car, but doesn't make a $100,000 impression anymore." hi Sober cleaning? Drycast episode 43 will be recorded LIVE tomorrow at 8PM CST and YOU CAN PARTICIPATE! """Meredith!...Those exist still.""" Hitler II. "verge: The New Horizons spacecraft has sent back a stunning new color photo of Pluto's moon, Charon …" David Blue Big Bad Berries Watch out! He's about to leak! verge: Edward Snowden didn’t turn off emails from Twitter and received 47GB of notifications … I;m thinking about thos Beans CODEiNE CASTLE JODYHiGHROLLER: NEON BLACK HAiR BECUZ APPARENTLY EVERYONE HAD A MEETiNG TO COLOR THEiR HAiR SO FUCK YOU WORLD FOR STEALiNG MY STYLE htt… ": One star review ""Joe is quick to put others down, but cant handle insults towards him. Horrible conversationalist. Frai…" ": Going to use Peeple to give everyone one-star reviews, comment ""killed my dog""" asuno_mint: bodybuildinga7: ? We feel nothing. Silver Cloud III Lust On Fleek FUCK. denialvibes: That doesn't look like a bad way to commute. Buy Fø??øwë?? lamp_head I am anxious to see what people have to say about me! lamp_head I am going to self-promote in every single rating. "Contemporary news services often have a ""suggested for you"" function. Ever considered how your consumption could be censored? Drycast" "syrupf you're better off than most of the collegiate gang, I suppose." Single-character Tweets are why I'm here. I've been missing out. "lamp_head ah. This is the soof language you intend to use within the app when it's released, then?" "I love how much hatred Peeple is receiving before it's even released. Yes, it's quite depraved, but such panic indicates insecurity." VolkswagenRally: After torrential rain we wish everybody a safe & successful TourdeCorseWRC. VolkswagenMotorspo10000corners WRC … This is stupid. Pollen Butt My Jaguar is very sick and yet so very good. "CommonsBot: Green Lake, Rotorua " This was not me. I have to get big so I can marry Swag Nugget and her loaf child. guccibraidz this is Cute As Heck. It's like a competition of suffering...which can very easily turn into a glorification of suffering...which is very bad. "Yes, I remember when dial-up was our only internet option and yes, it was very slow. Does this elevate me over those who don't somehow?" Seniority is such a strange thing to take genuine pride in. TheAVClub: Someone bought for $12 and owned it for a literal minute syrupf this is art. We Brought The New Lamborghini To Coachella Can I change my first name to Rupert? """Starter family.""" "EDWARD LOH, ladies and gentlemen." MotorTrend is SO much better than it was 10 years ago holy pee. """What the hell do you want with 400 kilos of battery driving around? No."" PREACH." "I love how the CEO of Maserati, of all people, willingly acknowledges that batteries are only an intermediate step before hydrogen." "AMikkelsenRally: SS1 TourdeCorseWRC kicks off in just minutes. Our statime is 09:27, third car on the road. RallyCorsica WRC http…" """We will never, ever compete on price."" - Harald Wester" It's a real life Takumi! Uh oh. WHOA! I don't know what today is! LOL! Haha! Chronological errors are the best of online humor! What day is it?! LOL! PizzaPartyBen Christmas is tomorrow! Anything but an S-10. I suppose it wouldn't be nice to say I'd rather just die. TruckTrendcom: Cancer sucks! Check out Chris Gibson's S-10 that he built as an alternative form of treatment! David Blue "Drycast is going LIVE in an hour with the Tesla Model X reveal, Takumi status, compact truck chemo, and more! " Craig 0kbps: whom tf This will never be outdone. purity boy. virgyvirgil no idea. virgyvirgil ? inclushe: AsphaltApostle use ublock origin Beautiful. (Google) Here is hell. I stand in doom. lorengrush: Elon Musk elaborates on his proposal to nuke Mars I don't understand. Don't forget to listen to Drycast episode 43 as it's recorded live in just under 4 hours! Wack MCs! Look at how pretty it is in white! time to kill. RoadandTrack: Ten badass variants of really boring cars. ladygaga: FUCK Remember Bowflex? I just did...holy shit. LIVE on Drycast! BREAKING NEWS. samsmithworld: Drunk tweeting guccitwist any other mammal. guccitwist least worthwhile animal. "ImJessiLang from what I know about you, you'd excel at leading one, I'm sure." guccitwist don't do it! PHYSICAL EXISTENCE is being discussed on Drycast! "lamp_head we're actually on Skype, if that's ok. Really excited that you're interested though! My username: DepravedInfant" "Drycast is still going. Talkin about Music, Film, Language, Edginess, all of culture in general. Intelligent stuff! " bodybuildinga7: ? Baseball Drycast is taking a break. Now guestless. Now's the time to join if you wanna be on tonight! The end. Drycast is taking a pizza wave break but we'll be back with Science / Tech momentarily! : I have been pissing continuously for 13 years Drycast EPISODE 43 IS LIVE!!!!!!! Drycast LIVE IN 5. Audio: tsqdance: Available to freely download here and stream here. Cover and tracklisting artwork... Drycast LIVE in 30 MINUTES AHHHH! kabeebus phosho. "JaguarUSA: City cat. FTYPECOUPE Photo credit: AlexBernPhoto " kabeebus Collin and BMW are probably not going to stay very late but I'll be available for eternity. Wow. APWCares: This never gets old! truck ford fordtrucks truckporn lookatmymini: I must have SHELL.old ave jameypricephoto: Today is one of those days where the photographers earn our money.... petitlemans petit roadatlanta … tama323: " Drakesville, IA." ": yeah im super into vintage video games, guns, cars, wine, records, military equipment, furniture, coffee, architecture,…" ciara_isobel: TF2Torrent just save it for a Petty Special. "MizzouFootball may your scurrying feet be swift and true! Beware the Big Boys, and never fear The Egg!" TF2Torrent it's ok. Probably going to be 2 weeks before we record again though. "Once again, The Egg must be hefted. The big boys toil in their chronically perilous burden." dysrexia Elliotson. Incredible. Rough estimate: ~5 days of continuous Drycast audio exists at this moment. "blank_was_blank: Her raindrops were incorrigible, like a pentecostal handkerchief" "Sentreh ah yes, good wordplay!" "UPCOMING Drycast content is gonna be super superb, folks! Thanks to everyone who helped out!" THIS IS AMAZING. guccibraidz BeanCon 2015. lamp_head were you wanting to get on-mic tonight or just chillin? Intelligent stuff now being said about EDUCATION. Today's big for Drycast for sure. yeah it's probably a good way to get killed. JeremyClarkson: oscarunwilde You're a fucking cyclist. honestly there should be a snuggleTinder. Hurricane Katrina snapchat filter. clock_hater I couldn't stand the screaming anymore. I'm sorry. Guilty until proven innocent. lamp_head don't apologize! Rest is important! And you deserve an episode all to yourself anyway. Food is stupid. 0kbps: David Blue 0kbps: orgamecha yeah in like 10 months. I have to kill my hair now. LILBTHEBASEDGOD: OPRAHHH WINNFREYYYYYYYYY OPPRAHHH WINFREEYYYYYYY MarthaStewart: K An especially well-executed episode of Drycast is now available to stream and download! TeslaModelX Peeple Media Cover of Time Magazine. Sad floral alien. AH. Sienna Guillory is the only acceptable philanthropist. MY MOTHER. I CANNOT COPE with stuff like this. Racing is beautiful. indianautos: BMW 9SeriesCoupe to rival Mercedes SClassCoupe – Repo- "Whoa. ""In a world of clones, heritability would be zero.""" JMan_Rife Oops. Srry bro. WHY/HOW AM I STILL SICK Sail_Yonkers: CarlSagan I need a vacation from people. PersonTheHumann True anarchism. Whoooooaaaa. I'll be taking the ACT exactly 100 years after the Titanic's iceberg collision. Lil' O is so cool. Demeaning blaming society for your own failings and writing for your audience in the same track. "Rapmonster: Time goes by so fast, people go in and out of your life. You must never miss the opportunity to tell these people how mu ..." PersonTheHumann Buy me this or I'll pee on your pretzel stash. öln-Concert/release/1259362 Video: Keith Jarrett - The Vienna ConceHoly shit. "I may be old fashioned, but I'm really tired of being bombarded with sex from every damn media source I use. An escape would be nice." PersonTheHumann ihadtopee is making money. There is no god. "amazingatheist: Don't look for WiseWordsToLiveBy on twitter, you fucking moron." Sh*t my alters say. Good movie. WTT social media for a work ethic. Sail_Yonkers YES. I can. DAVID KLAZZ """The world's first cyber sitcom"" Damn, just what I've always wanted. " just when I'm doing big man things. I look so civilized now! I'll probably never look this good again so... travisjdahnke precisely. "UPROXX: ""Alone In The Woods, In Front Of A Microphone."" The curious world of thru-hiking podcasts …" I've spent my entire life looking like a really bad knockoff of Tom Cruise. travisjdahnke the key to Nevermore. Lookin like I'm about to accidentally throw you off the Titanic II. I could watch this video for the rest of my life. Try and tell me the French horn is not the cutest-sounding instrument in existence. Please marry me. "This is a more accurate reference, technically. " I'd very much like to compose an operatic of this track. "This is what I was playing, for reference. " I would legitimately love to have this as the first cover for Inmunis. I'm exhausted. "lamp_head of course! Video won't show up in the cast but it's always welcome, of course." JeremyClarkson: Not sure I've got the hang of this cooking malarkey JeremyClarkson: Why has the moon swollen up? You'll be impressed; I didn't kill the taco man. I honestly look even less trustworthy now idk how this is even possible. drewtoothpaste: Trigger warning: grass this photograph is very upsetting. jagkandsally: kabeebus wow dude. I don't know if I can be a paof this. kabeebus good God man. Have more respect for Satan! DateMyFamily verge: Tech journalism time capsule: the wonderful world of 1996 computing "verge: Valve employee surprises girlfriend, turns tech demo into VR marriage proposal " NoiseyMusic: Some Lana del Rey fans who bought her debut LP were treated to a blast of shoegaze instead … VVFriedman: Swiss cheese shirts at Swiss brand Akris PFW Unbearably adorable. "I could be blind here, but I don't detect pretentiousness, surprisingly. " Today I absentmindedly bought Loët dark chocolate and cranberry juice for a snack. I fear I am truly nearing the end of my life. "I just passed an elderly gentlemen wearing a stocking cap in an XKR convertible with the top down. Same." your face is very masculine - pretty huge error IMO. Big Joke David Blue str8boytexts: Hedge 3.0. "gaev66NINO: Alfa GTA am In action -the most ssuccessful touring car ever, European and worldtitels-alfa_romeo RonSmallenburg …" A few customers are reportedly starting to be agitated by my timepiece inquiries. """And what soof cut did you want today?"" ""Ancient Aliens."" " abbylovescoffee: Real journalism syrupf still grieving. Going to author a self-help book focusing on the life benefits of being woken up by loud shrieking every morning. This is cute as heck. I suppose we most often personify what we've spent a ton of money on. The ingenuity of my people. David Blue ???????????? Let's all take a moment to remember the Pontiac Torrent. csgo_txt: Fuck The Italian XJ coupe. AsphaltApostle nice joke dude. Scotch should be on EBT. "CIA: No, we don’t know where Tupac is. twitterversary" grandma P. guccitwist Nate. kabeebus coupe. Black everywhere. Is the base Fiesta fun to drive? kabeebus the Prince of Darkness dailies a Cummins-powered 1975 Cadillac El Dorado. "ihaveswineflu: It's why my hands r so orange ,, they're full of secrets (secret carrots)" AristotIee: 6 Nearly 1000 interactions. Fascinating. One year ago. Have I released any of it? I hope not. bodybuildinga7: Butt Toning Workout: you're wrong. Your bandcamp link would be tattooed on Jeb Bush's upper lip by now. His ability to relentlessly care about things is what I most often joke about - probably because I just envy it. Imagine what you could do with the intellectual energy of Wil Wheaton. Is this the first time I've played a game of this type? I honestly can't remember. """If you're worried about any sleeper cell agents in your midst...just listen for the popping.""" "The entirety of the video from both games will be on YouTube soon, by the way." "Unsurprisingly, I ruined the game. The argument now has support, at least." LIVE on Periscope: TRAITOR: Betrayal at House on the Hill Tabletop Game I think I lost. LIVE on Periscope: Betrayal at House on the Hill LIVE on Periscope: TABLE GAME: Betrayal at House on the Hill wilw legitimate question: the huge bird is carrying the house. Can we reason with the bird? Hasn't been specified. Would you believe me if I told you I'm playing a game right now. A WIL WHEATON game no less? Episode 1 of Mr. Rogers was about electric cars and yet the daily discourse I hear reveres them as futurism. OH BOY. trubIu ??. : Having fun outdoors edward_ki32: Davide la pensa cosi e voi?? str8boytexts: TUTORIAL: How to systematically ruin the fun of a game. Nofaytes CaitlinWinn37 ammnontet I would never go near an area with 8mph speed limits. ammnontet (my profile picture was taken within 10 feet of where this was taken.) ammnontet no. Please help. TF2Torrent thanks. Daily visual mess. "Readers of USA Today, Why?" Can someone please stop by with an instrument. I'll only be a minute. I'm having a piano emergency. good holiday rodent sentiment. Data Vegan David Blue OwenTheNorris: A wonderfully simple drivers eye view. All you need and nothing more CARandDRIVER: The best iteration of BMW's M5? Here's how to buy one of these performance bargains … Rees pulling up to the temple in the god damned Aston. Now THAT is actual wisdom. "Fernando_Rees: We all have time to either spend or waste - it is our decision what to do with it. Once passed, it is gone forever. http…" "RevolverUnit: We're all trapped in a mall of relationships, Life goes on with or without you I swim in the sea of the unconscious, http…" guccibraidz beautiful alien. "ClickHole: We shouldn't have to look at things like this, twitter. " derek_bowe: Literally sent my parents a picture of a tortilla "ClickHole: Find Out What Kenny Chesney, Ken Follett, And Ellen Page Have To Say TheySaidWHAT …" therealautoblog: The VW diesel scandal is now a Halloween costume. It's amazing: Volkswagen dieselgate … I haven't been able to stop watching these USTOL Cub videos they're just unbelievable. csgo_txt: Cyber-ass headline if I ever done seen one. "motherboard: Facebook is using an entire satellite to bring the internet to Africa: " syrupf time 2 Golf. pissboot is your teacher 5? MBUSA: Now watch me whip. Ayn Rand vs. Memes "I know we all like to hate on popular music, but Sam Smith is truly a goddamned gift from the universe." "you're a true friend, Collin." "My new profile pic is a tribute to my sheepskin jacket, which I ripped horribly yesterday." I'm thinking about the French horn again. I'm a patriot because I can afford scotch. Nofaytes CaitlinWinn37 Click here to skip to face licking / Terry crying. I HAVE NEVER CREATED A MORE SCARY PIECE OF SOUND THAN THE LOWERED VOCAL THING LOOK AT THIS I relate to owls. "ammnontet: ive been doing some research & nobody invented clothes, they just appeared one day. look at your shiunder a microscope. i…" ammnontet wait polygamy is still legal? Need to look into this. I need so many wives. ammnontet you're capable of looking innocent enough to infiltrate...gain his trust...turn him. ammnontet content father. ammnontet forreal though Nina you're cute as heck. You won't need anything extravagant to get the correct answer. Is Headline Appreciator a legitimate position in the industry? WHAT A WONDERFUL HEADLINE HOLY piggyback. who said anything about a car? " ""hey, you fucker. You're my ride to homecoming.""" pissboot replace them with a huge pic of me. cool lamp. Rick Breath HulkHogan: Can I text u DevonSweeney420: xans had me sleepin forever i woke up outside TylerElkstar because this is me rn. TylerElkstar have you been watching me? Norticol ClickHole: Here's a link to our website just in case! ClickHole: How Selfless Are You? ClickHole: Will It Be October? ClickHole: Their Finest Moments: The 6 Greatest Triumphs In NASA History "Morality of Flex, by David Blue" The Underground Edition cassette set is more dense in motivation than any other object in existence. "Honestly if you're struggling in any aspect of life and not listening to Big KRIT, it's time to rethink." """What's up, bitch?"" - Mama" 0kbps royalties. colesprouse: Here's my finished MiloThatch halloween costume! Yes I own a framed picture of Teddy Roosevelt. Atlantis … moshashes send pics. human feces. moshashes I need more. pissboot 150 fps is nearly 3 times faster than what the human eye can perceive. justinbieber: i love arm TF2Torrent agreed. It's actually impressive how much they fucked it up. lamp_head tactical pope. no. David Blue U N L I M I T E D M A T R I M O N Y orgamecha deal. "orgamecha would still welcome partnership, though, but contact would probably be strange. Thanks." orgamecha unfortunately I have been stricken with straight as hard as I've tried to fight it. Thanks. Cute girls hmu for completely platonic marriage. Nothing about your life has to change but cheek kisses are involved on a voluntary basis. I can say these things because I am guilty of many of them. "garage sale-attending, bird-watching, jazz standards-listening, bumper sticker-stacking, holiday-celebrating ""Grass Roots"" motherfuckers." "4-way stop-stopping, ordinance-abiding, pinochle-playing, community radio-supporting, city government-participating, academia-worshipping," "mediocre wine-drinking, aspiration-hating, shirt-tucking, flyer-posting, zoo-going, Yelp-reviewing, windmill-owning, local art-buying," "Day driving around here is basically intolerable with all of the petty-ass casual fishing hat-wearing, Subaru-driving, food-opining," David Blue an E39 M5 pulled in but it'd been ruined completely. akiba_k3i I haven't driven it yet but honestly I love everything about what I've seen and heard. akiba_k3i you don't like the new one? you should if you get the chance. I don't think there's ever been a bad one. I cannot find a Fiesta ST in this town. mitsucars: Got a lot of love for the Evo? Well then you'll want to tune in to Periscope/Twitter 10/14. EvoFinalEdition … verge: Amazon made a huge plastic box called Snowball so people can ship data to the cloud syzhim no pee. wikisext: sext: i slowly remove my head as you remove your hams syzhim when u pee. David Broth At least my last name isn't Broth. : It is not physically or mentally possible to drive over the speed limit while listening to NPR (Vine by nut) realest celebrity home tour guide in hollywood (Vine by manwolfchild) The Virtue of Flex HammerFist3: Damn girl you just tickle me pink ammnontet: real gun hours if u up shoot ur gun PersonTheHumann definitely. I'll work on opening up next week. "virgyvirgil I did get a haircut recently, but this was filmed in early January." PersonTheHumann I was way too out of it and I lost the audio so I'm probably just not going to include it. "According to Farah, drunk editing en masse can be a productive pursuit." "Honestly, what's the difference? " Have you ever seen a less appealing photograph? "StarJoyThePoet: When life hands you lemons, turn it into a profit and open a lemonade stand." """Stayour day by reading about the new Porsche 991.2 Carrera 4 and Targa 4 range:"" ""No.""" Wow. Evo flee. "The best way to see the Bentayga for the first time, I think. " botalertnews: Could Obamacare Be Encouraging Your Women to Try Hacking? botalertnews: How Gluten Will Cause The Worst Economic Downturn in Centuries botalertnews: California Drought Could Be Making Your Birds Join A Gay Cult orgamecha: fuck me like i taped over Ice Road Truckers 2b8ab34717da42e I go to garage sales too. This is the most moving photograph I have ever seen. "JeremyClarkson: With a skeleton crew, filming for Amazon Prime's new motoring programme has begun. " The Douche Switch. F I S H T R U N K S mzeroa: Have a flight training question for my webinar tonight? You better ask it now before I finish the presentation... ... I took off. My psychologist and pediatrician are working with my AME to come up with a solution to the medication issue. I probably won't fly for awhile Just got my FAA letter rejecting my 3rd class medical application after what...2 months? ChrisPirillo make um' sleep on the floor. thereshouldbealaw banning humidifiers in the Midwestern U.S. midMOwxguy jimmyfallon: Mad Men promo for primetimeemmys mzeroa: New at M0A! First Flight Solo - What To Expect - "emeek77: ever put watered down gas in a car? And thats what pc software is, watered down mac software. It spits, sputters and DIES." "midMOwxguy oh ok. You had me worried for a second lol. I'm sorry, but y'all at ABC17 are the highest quality team in the area." midMOwxguy where you movin' to? You'd better not be leaving ABC17! We need good meterologists! This is the meanest pirate look I can muster. fail Time to go clubbing with my beastly headgear. aaarrrrrg That means I'll be wearing a patch for 20 mins a day for a month to try and get my left eye to 20/20. "Just got back from another appointment with the eye doctor. With the new glasses both eyes are 20/15, right is 20/20 and left is 20/25." Watching fiddlerontheroof performed by a local group. So trippy. "AgObj_c how are you going to get into web design, when you don't even give your own website designers credit?....." emeek77 thanks! I'll be sure to check it out. emeek77 what'd ya' get? TechnoBuffalo: Why Are People Angry That The iPhone Is AT&T-Only? The iPhone 4 display still amazes the WilliamShatner outa me. I'm a Jazz snob. Autumn Leaves is not performed right unless your piano is on fire. "Will possibly need big, strapping men interested in furthering the Pianoviolence cause this afternoon." ru2213y Those are shitty games because they don't run in 1080p. Need to staa Pianoviolence movement. Racism is nothing more than ignorance. BeyondTheRails: Facist Faux Ivory Cum - Hoarderowles EP. Quality Pianoviolence. I've decided to force myself to like Formula 1. The Australian Grand Prix is a week from tomorrow. There's also half a gallon of chocolate milk in me that has yet to be accounted for. I have now heard Jarrett on final. Followed by Too $hort. Life is complete. Rather like my new handle. When you get fettuccine you don't need a lota SAWCE. "Thug lyfe. “PersonTheHumann: 1 AM with King's Field IV, Trae - Losing Composure, and half a glass of water from yesterday”" Thnx burnt. The coffee stains add philosophical meaning. "Representative Democracy is bullshit. Then again, I hate people. So don't listen to me." "JMan_Rife Next time, park your car inside a building. The police will never think to look there." TheAutoBully: Knock on wood grain. I feel like Keith Jarrett is cheating on Rose Anne with me. "It's almost a shame that The Melody at Night, With You was released. It's really too intimate for everyone." Thank you based Jarrett. Justin_Hyde: All Chrysler dealers really needed was that pep talk from Clint Eastwood. "PersonTheHumann A, sibling bonding." "hiltonholloway: I'm convinced that unless dieselgate costs owners money, the general public will hardly take notice. …" speedmonkeycouk this is beautiful. speedmonkeycouk: Lotus Elise S2 Review carreview sportscarsreviewed "speedmonkeycouk: Lotus pedals. Hand made in Norfolk. Note accelerator, modelled on a knife blade. Brake has no assistance …" RichardHammond: The band is back together and it feels brilliant. MrJamesMay: Great first day at work. I can't stop staring. I'd actually rather hear what you have to say over a journo/engineer because I hear/read them all day. "mrtn76: It's dark and rainy here in Amsterdam. Goodbye summer, hello autumn... " " ""honestly, the new Tesla's 50 foot range is going to present a challenge to daily activity.""" " have also considered this, believe it or not." " I'd test it as ""the new Jeep.""" " I can pilot a steamboat, you know." I will drive anything. I agree. Seattle would make for a much better location anyway. "WSJ: Some Nobel Prize winners think they’re getting a prank call " Raw audio for Dan and Vid's bit is 4 hours long so... we discussed it in greater detail last episode. "PrestigeDiesels: ThrowbackThursday Lanica Love Have a great day all ;-) 7scraps bandit4470 BCJr kewlkars " I'm fairly sure this is its origin. regularcars: Corbin too us to the top of the Snake. We met some fans who..didn't know we were us at first :) " I'm aware, but the ""takumi status"" of some Japanese engineers has only been used on Twitter for like...a week." Ok who started the Takumi thing. OfficialLexusUK: How did our takumi drive masters help engineer the LexusCT 200h FSport? Find out here: http:/… "andersoncooper: Ummm... Clickhole, do u make this stuff up? I never said this quote and never spoke to the NYU class of 2015. https:/…" orgamecha do I need to protect him from you? 2b8ab34717da42e I'm more afraid of interrupting the sexually-crazed youths and their engorged intentions. A1GOY: Today is not shit. I wonder if I'll ever be as big as my hands and feet. 2b8ab34717da42e I would've rather just peed in the woods and saved the $750k but ya know. "2b8ab34717da42e they completely leveled a 10-acre forest with trees 50+ old to build a ""nature observatory"" that stays completely abandoned" 2b8ab34717da42e (it's also the official Honk test track) 2b8ab34717da42e nope. This is it. White Label scotch necessary for 7AM Thursday news. 2b8ab34717da42e it's completely unused because the park is a joke. orgamecha ok Dad. Thanks. Just Chillin in a public park restroom at 4:30 AM. lamp_head we usually record 8PM CST on Fridays but we'll be skipping tomorrow. lamp_head yeah I'm Tumblr royalty dude. "lamp_head it doesn't hurt. I like HUGE lenses with crazy light absorption so I can be known as ""The Owl"" on Tumblr." orgamecha don't subtweet me. "lamp_head honestly I only ever feel the urge to take pics at night and yet I don't have the lenses, really." lamp_head lots of WATER and LAMPS at NIGHT. "lamp_head holy pee, can I come where you are?" lamp_head here's some lamp porn for you. Photoset: lamp_head what a beautiful way to die. lamp_head *deafening sound of glass breaking* Is there a more frightening combination of words? ScareMeIn3Words holistic compliance portal ScareMeIn3Words BMW Poison Storage ScareMeIn3Words making jean shorts. she's busy. ihaveswineflu: couples Bitcoin costume "ciara_isobel ""Hello. I'm Bill Clinton.""" "orgamecha: alright now fellas whats cooler than bein cool AAAAAAAAAAAAA i cant hear you i said whats cooler than bein cool AAAAAAAAAAAA…" "MBUSA: Driver, pull over, I see an unattended tennis ball. " where are you? 2b8ab34717da42e there is none. That's why I'm here. I LOVE this thing. It's the green one. "2b8ab34717da42e no deviation is allowed in, trust me. I can go hours without seeing a soul at 3AM in a relatively densely-populated area." ESI_Performance: 2015 Bentley Mulsanne Speed Video Review " remember to breathe, James." Why is there food on my TL right now. orgamecha I'm just a Goober. "orgamecha I don't think he would, either." "2b8ab34717da42e I live in an aging suburb of Columbia, Missouri." orgamecha that was a joke. 2b8ab34717da42e nah. That low-income stuff stays very far away from here. They'd be killed by the police if they dared approach. TF2Torrent well done. OurEdisons ah yes. Very good. OurEdisons me too. We're not recording until a week from tomorrow. A new episode still releases this Saturday though. There is no such thing as too many umbrellas. 2b8ab34717da42e I was just making a cultural joke but thank you. 2b8ab34717da42e I'm huge. 2b8ab34717da42e I'm too big. 2b8ab34717da42e you watched the whole thing?! 2b8ab34717da42e brilliant simplification. ByeBads: AsphaltApostle David AkeelBrowne B?b?||I dontcopy_CAT Your spartridgee Sarah heatherarielle heather BabeOfwgkta Kerrie … Have you heard? Netflix and chill is old news! HONK and chill is the new pastime! I always get out the fine China for Netflix and chill. Journalist seeking employment. Have experience on the ethnocyberbotany beat. Who deleted my buoy pics folder. PizzaRollParty ammnontet DDOS? I'm sure GoDaddy would welcome the test. ammnontet PizzaRollParty bad knockoff of Jack from Titanic; about to accidentally drop you in the frigid Atlantic. David Blue "If you need help using a search engine, contact me and I'll provide it - for a fee." "If you would like to see a picture of a penis, I suggest you make use of the huge variety of search engines that are available to you." Just FYI. "I have never taken a photograph of my genitals, and I never will." PersonTheHumann an expression of true enjoyment! The only desirable Corvette. CARandDRIVER: Would you enjoy a classic chevrolet Corvette? more if it resembled . . . a breadvan? TBT … Counter-promotion. Nor will it show up in iTunes until I can resolve it. Apparently WordPress in cPanel isn't functioning? So no show notes for tomorrow's episode of Drycast. HOW DID I FORGET ABOUT THIS why won't radio shack air my advertisements (Vine by mikema_) There are 20 referrals from here... Nina's page received nearly 700 hits. This cringey-ass video has been downloaded 72 times. Most popular episode of Drycast? The one with Ryan Dell of course. 1400 HITS FROM NETSCAPE???? 33 hits from the PS3 browser. "~63,000 unique visitors to the website this year so far and I'm wondering where they all went." syrupf: good night guccibraidz have you been listening to Memphis horrorcore? syrupf: dj rental car I'm devastated. A life without Bentley isn't worth living. Why would you want to survive an apocalypse. oh. I was hoping they'd be cheaper than usual food so I could just eat them all the time. Can you just order MREs? ": imagine being on the toilet you are completely out of toilet paper you press your amazon dash button you have an hour un…" This has got to be a joke. ... CassKittie: ??ompton Timaldini: Continental GT V8 S 2b8ab34717da42e hello. "Sentreh sometimes, I just want to tweet ""D""" TheNextTwitterFeature breathalyzer. Kinneas: TheNextTwitterFeature Follow someone's entire list with one tap "TheNextTwitterFeature LET ME TWEET ""D""" HammerFist3: Excuse me waiter you're sitting in my soup PersonTheHumann Rudy. I SEE COMBINES ?????? "You would, Lexus. " N A T T I A P P R O A C H lamp_head bed mode = all resources devoted to optimum CPU performance for Bitcoin mining. syrupf PROTECT. StarJoyThePoet: staying alive. "Yes, I'd like to honeymoon in Forklift City." Forklift City "koenigsegg: Just topped 90,000 Twits following our account. Donuts for everyone!!! " YES. Dan_Connell: Drifting into the weekend. Enjoy your XJ Jaguar MazdaRacing: Best of RoadAtlanta: Several Mazda drivers experienced vertigo/motion sickness because of the lack of visibility. … davepell: Conan should launch a show about his garage. "In fact, just have at it. Listen here: " I'm devastated. I don't think Swag Nugget wants to marry me anymore. I looked autojourno AF today. Btw I'm precise tagging these so that you can come find me and kill me. Shall I give the treadmill a go? "Just hanging out with my friend, RIVER QUEEN. " (Vine by swagnug) Today show reruns. HulkHogan: Wow HulkHogan: Hello HulkHogan: Wow. HH Deserted hotels are my shit. ammnontet: I'm an indie rock musician look at me I found a hedge ooooooooo charlietriplett: Panoramic stretch Jeep. "JaguarUSA: TBT to ""the most beautiful car ever made."" - Enzo Ferrari. EType " "Literally. ""1...doesn't go anywhere! 2...what the hell are you doing?""" I'm watching Coach K rate the single digits. David Blue My favorite place. Pumice in the soap and shower queue on the intercom. Brazil! RoadandTrack: Listen to this insanely loud Hellcat with no muffler. "AM_Capparella: Best typo I've made lately? ""the addition of a urea filtration system to restrict diesel emotions"" VW diesel TDI" 0kbps: tofu lookin ass bitch David Blue " WEAR THE SUIT AND GROW HUGE, JAMES." ": Through sheer effoive turned myself into a ""beer guy"" and kind of a ""car guy"" even tho i only drove one car ever" "dril: congress members fighting over who can scream ""halo 5"" the loudest, until a senior member stands up and yells ""halo 6"", infuriati…" "geeksquadmcgee1: Me: *Mario Kart* Dad: *Never Plays* Dad: ""It's a good thing you haven't hit any red lights yet. That would really slo…" BMW: The ripest one. MT SamRashty The apple doesn't fall far from the tree... BMW M3 Piss. "BeardedGenius: Daily Mail HQ: ""A Muslim girl won GBBO"" ""Find some dirt"" ""There is none"" ""No terrorist links?"" ""None"" ""FIND ONE"" http:/…" "JoanCaste: She got ""randomly selected"". Her face is priceless. " "StarJoyThePoet: If you constantly admire a female for wearing make up and not while she is bare faced, she will develop self-esteem iss…" There are barges and clocks and wood-fueled fires here. I like Cincinnati. StarJoyThePoet: Anyone who loves Big K.R.I.T is okay in my book The new Versa is actually kinda cute. HUFF StarJoyThePoet Big KRIT stuff. You should listen if you like life. He is my 4th Dad/big brother. Still Throwed. Still Berry. "StarJoyThePoet Evil Pimp is my sacred scary friend. Forreal though, stuff is happening. " StarJoyThePoet I'm a raspberry again. Sorry. I would've taken good care of Bean but I'm not hot enough. Also I just made a huge mess with pop tarts in the hotel lobby. 0kbps: PREACH???????? YOU SAID SOMETHING OBVIOUS?????????? THAT THE AVERAGE PERSON SHOULD AGREE WITH?????????????????????????????????????????????????????? TheOnion: Man Disgusted Just By Constant Thought Of 2 Guys Kissing 0kbps: perfect men don't exi- I've been working on mine no lie. ihaveswineflu: all of my clothes can be found in Pixar movies Cute mafia couple. David Blue BDSMKyle "kabeebus ? straight ? gay ? DUGA" There's a fire! "? straight ? gay ? Bentley NationalComingOutDay" : This is sad :( I had 5 espresso shots and then a nice nap. Big boys! The Cincinnati handegg Kiwanis wear Jimmy John uniform! StarJoyThePoet exactly. StarJoyThePoet "Walked by the church and they thought I was an angel. (Damn)" Lady Dead syrupf: d­ Mice don't even have the decency to leave when asked to... Why y'all fuck with rodents? "Hey guys! Kim Jong-un here," Majestic Horse Ghost rollsroycecars: RollsRoyce Majestic Horse Ghost - a Bespoke car which takes inspiration from the finest Chinese artistic tradition. ht… So Drycast is rogue until a software issue is resolved. No iTunes or show notes...just the file. Here's episode 44: I think I'm getting a cold. Piss. David Blue Quirky botany enthusiast! Quirky boy and his plants! "syrupf: im the talk of the town every time im in town people stathrowing rocks at me" regularcars thanks. peta: JODYHiGHROLLER It's great to hear you're putting animals first! We have lots of tips & are always here to help ?? … JODYHiGHROLLER: i LOVE ANiMALS TOO MUCH i HAVE TO BE A VEGETARiAN NOW BECUZ i CANT LOOK AT BEEF JERKY THE SAME ANYMORE WiTHOUT THiNKiNG… "Banky, my favorite street artist." "This is David Blue, LIVE from the loud noise." "You don't understand... She was listening to Memphis horrorcore in her Benz the other day... I have to marry Swag Nugget." I have to marry Swag Nugget. I am sober. RICK HAS ENDANGERED US ALL "Souljaian: Still Alive! Hahaha I Can't Lose. " David Blue Trying to write about America without sounding like an anarchistic douchebag. PersonTheHumann Sorry. Walking through pouring rain listening to clipping thrash jazz on 3 hours of sleep. My steering wheel is literally disintegrating. This is why I hate vinyl interiors. Korio_Lanus: DepravedInfant I can remember smells of food at restaurants but can't remember where the fuck they are so I can get th ... "I remember the things I imagine more often and more readily than the things I actually experience.... Pretty sure that's not ""healthy.""" Please let the power go out so I can play my piano all night instead of homework. What the fuck is Zorn DOING to that fucking saxophone. Torture Garden sounds like I'm flipping through shitty TV music channels while someone is screaming unintelligible gibberish in my ear. P1L0T: Chandelle. flying aviation billed Duh duh duh dah de da de da de da duh de nuh ne nuh nuh de dah de doo doo. Pretty sure Mr. McQue was humming Hard in the Paint. "Jon4Lakers: Canon EOS Rebel T4i Rumored to Have Touchscreen LCD, Wi-Fi via technobuffalo" Pianoviolence. "If the United Federation of Planets existed, I probably wouldn't be on anti-depressants." Just bought Buttercorn Lady because I'm a Keith Jarrett nerd. My alternative to March Madness being played in class. All I could think of during the relaxation tape was how bad I want to sample it. I hate music. Mail-order weed. """Down to Earth"" should be an insult, not a compliment." "I think the first Pianoviolence album should be entitled ""Snobs Over Standards""." Your rendition of Giant Steps is shit unless you're using your feet on the keys and your hands on the pedals. "*dispatched with* come on, give me a goddang break." I hope this has been dispatched in the new show. """And now, we must put a star in our reasonably-priced car."" Must you, really?" harrismonkey: Slooooooooooow "fractweet: 0x2c392c 0xb961c9 0xee5872 (0.390293,0.314654) zoom0.000679316 pow0.0597654 affine0 " More lamp porn. lamp_head yes sir! 8PM CST is go time as of right now. Bernie Sanders sorta sounds like every angry Philadelphian driver. scottjohnson just name a time and a place pal. Scott Johnson wants a war. Do not put food on your face. TxtYoutube: millenials were a mistake orgamecha good morning. "scottjohnson t'was simply a joke, my friend. Carry on." "Jim_Holder ""Big boy! HUGE MAN! BIIIIIIG!""" "mihmnop forreal though, everything I've heard about Australia is tremendously appetizing except for the insects." mihmnop this is indisputable - I am a cultural sage. mihmnop all Australians look like either Emilie de Ravin or Eric Bana and drift utes around their sheep scrap fields. mihmnop I know things are a bit different down there. "For real though, collision avoidance systems are so cute." Disgusting cretins. "As a child, my toy cars were NEVER intentionally crashed together. In fact, accidental contact was an emotionally traumatic event." BallardBot: 27. The Bonfire of the Volvos This is pretty neat. good morning. EL_C_ROD_DIZZLE: Hugh as fuck plus grub guanyu2510: Hugh as fuck. Gonna quit drinking. TrayDolo_: Hugh as fuck and it's only 6 ??? SkyEasson: I need to get Hugh as fuck roederboater: WHEN YOURE HUGH AS FUCK AND GIVE NO FUCKS LoFlytKulture: nissan 370z melbourne loflyt Rotten apples are not pleasant food. This is my last joy on Earth. (This is how you know The End approaches.) I always guess correctly when it's Schumann or Chopin though. Piano puzzler post-mortem update: I guessed the composer correctly the first time around and it took Fred Child himself 3 attempts. mitsucars: Introducing the Lancer Evolution Final Edition US0001. EvoHallOfFame guccibraidz you're addicted to Bean. watch enough Korean movies and you will never again find a white man attractive. I feel like this would only illicit concern. MarthaStewafarewell. "MarthaStewart: Yeah. I am driving at 60mph, talking on my phone and tweeting at the same time!!! Its fun!!! Think I am really???????" hayesdata did I hear you wrong in TST 191 about mechanical ignitions actually being more costly than push-button systems? David Blue "USA Today is not a bad publication but the paper's look is just SO terrible and cluttered, I'm impressed anyone can sit through it." E. "Honestly though, Upstairs Vol. 84 is one of THE worst things ever recorded." LMS if this track has ever made you cry. He who has never given a fuck. I must resurrect my Jaguar before fall gets any prettier. Donate. "If you really care about the wellbeing of your child, you need to PURGE ALL SCREENS OF THE ELMO CREATURE IMMEDIATELY." I have become quite white again. This is very upsetting. What am I doing letting my Jaguar fester in the garage when THERE IS NEW KRIT. I'M FUCKING CRYING RIGHT NOW THE GODDAMNED 86 JOKE WarmCigarette slightlyspoopy why not spend the rest of your day educating yourself!? Listen to Drycast! StarJoyThePoet that's a rhetorical question. StarJoyThePoet I mean...has he ever released anything bad? edward_ki32: Ecco il posteriore. StarJoyThePoet oh shit it dropped! StarJoyThePoet: AsphaltApostle Listen to this with me! "Want to know what defines ""The New?"" NOT USING THE WORD ""TiVo"" EVER AGAIN." steve_cars: Volvo’s all-electric Tesla rival to arrive in 2019 Here is the terrifying noise from the tabletop video. JeremyClarkson: We're going to need a faster helicopter. JeremyClarkson: I see that many people think our new show is called Gear Knobs. Well you heard it here first. It isn't. asuno_mint: "WilhelmL_CARmag: Early morning shoot of this month's test bike, the Indian Scout. " OurEdisons I'm unavailable tomorrow but we'll still be recording at 8PM CST on Friday. This is just supplemental to that episode. "If anyone's functioning and in a content-producing mode, I'd like to record a chat for Drycast tonight." "Sentreh ah. It's a contemporary apiece, then." Sentreh hello. "A man just accused me of being a ""balloon-headed, whipped cream-shooting hippie"" and I am unsure of what to say." verge: Tesla's cars can drive themselves starting tomorrow "hayesdata fascinating. It makes sense, I suppose. Thanks for indulging me." "Sitrep, fountain pen day 1: Fountain pens are consuming my life." Fraternal Wiccans is the best idea I've had in a long time. "I think it may actually be the cutest of the three, in an alien soof way." NBD HAVE YOU SEEN Top Gear's bit on the P1? "2b8ab34717da42e I did, actually, but he's one of those yelly men that can't hear over themselves." I still don't understand reddit. Ambitiose Sed Ineptum Urban camo Vauxhall Nova. Burning alive is a Drycast tradition. C U L T U R E H I V E wikisext: sext: you search or discuss possible solutions or counter-arguments PersonTheHumann the new mixtape is here. "WarmCigarette thank you for your feedback, cig. It's very rare that I receive useful and honest criticism regarding the empire." GlennCDoyle: Think I'll go with this 1955 Maserati A6G/54 Berlinetta for my ThrowbackThursday this week! tbt "WarmCigarette you're a dream come true but we are old, my friend, and the standards of visual media cleanliness have all but disappeared." CyberEveryword: ???????? Big KRIT's a better producer than most of the dudes he raps over IMO. (Which is really hilarious.) My Sub pt. 4882983 "WarmCigarette this is good advice, but its purpose is to realize humanity 3.0 and explicitly declaring so tends to frighten audiences." "slightlyspoopy WarmCigarette this is the only proven sadness remedy I know, sorry. " slightlyspoopy WarmCigarette do not actually consume my content under the influence - it will make you sad. Warren G on a KRIT track and DJ Screw is dead. WarmCigarette slightlyspoopy self-promotion is always the best answer to life's most difficult questions. Please do not block me. StarJoyThePoet feel free. I have extreme bias. He's in my top three favorite beings of all time. Pocket DSM-IV "jesawyer: guy on street, ""you know the definition of insanity, right?"" *rushes home to check new 1-page version of the DSM-6* ""wow, so …" is that the angry game man? virgyvirgil: the guy in the middle sorta looks like AsphaltApostle orgamecha never mind - he can't be saved. CommonsBot: .deepforger "denialvibes: When my lottery numbers come up, I'm buying one of those. I don't care if it's any good, LOOK AT IT " orgamecha save him. JamesBlunt: Jesus only needed twelve. garymoody65: JamesBlunt why you only got 200k followers? JamesBlunt: I look bigger with a gun. "AbominableAlSad it's over for now, don't worry." "trubIu ""Dad.""" "AbominableAlSad I'm no different, just ranting." It's early in the morning and ole' Dave is off affirming our worth again. "Emotional bit done now, sorry." We're the most beautiful things in sight...so either go away or shut the fuck up. "This is why I so despise when people say things like ""I hate people"" or ""I hate humanity."" Human beings have done fucking amazing things." Top Gear is the only television program that has made me cry. "Silly of me to doubt us, even for a moment." A weaponized wind farm. The sheer aspiration and ingenuity contained within the P1 is a tell...all is well in the world of humanity. "Honestly, the P1, LaFerrari, and 918 announcements made me really emotional because I'd accepted the ""performance is dead"" line." CyberEveryword: ?????????????? "I just deleted 60GB of raw & project files that I'd been saving for ONLY 3 EPISODES on the rationale of ""I'll go back and fix it.""" "If I don't catch a screwup before I release something, it will bother the crap out of me until I eventually shun the content altogether." "Tbh, I've always been obsessed with more truly capturing audio and if you see a slip in my content's quality, it's thanks to self-restraint." cPanel any idea when the Installatron issues will be resolved? "Jon4Lakers: Skype video chats now open to all, no account needed via technobuffalo " JaguarUSA: TBT to the XK getting sideways. I remember when podcasts were first added to iTunes. Podcasting is the ULTIMATE grandma medium if you think about it. This is fascinating. Train Hero 0kbps: David Blue PetroliciousCo: DriveTastefully "BrutalHouse: Hyson Green Nottingham (1978) " openculture: How J.K. Rowling Plotted Harry Potter with a Hand-Drawn Spreadsheet Aristocratic eugenics playthings. "TimbreTweet: Has a podcast ever made you cry? If so, which one & what episode?" I still consider us a colony. GreekAnalyst: A lad frustrated w the pool of US presidential candidates sent a letter to The Queen asking her to take the US back. http… THIS TWEET. MBUSA: Making a friend in Thailand in the classic 1964 220 S. TBT The new Facebook Messenger notification is terrifying. Rory_Carroll Jalopnik contact me - I wouldn't have gotten caught. DAVE Jalopnik: Cops say newspaper journalists spying on the Tesla Gigafactory rammed security with a Jeep … youtube12: eating FOOD Pre-20th century ClickHole "ClickHole: Behold These Wonders From Afar: Pine Apples, The Edible Jewels Of The Orient " Viewers have watched 2 solid days of Drywall content in 2015. This is the top video this month. Real 90s kids remember the fear of death. NETGEAR 0kbps: And this is the best shot. Here's where it gets HEATED in a PUBLIC RESTROOM. Here is a link to some pornography. "Drycast is going LIVE at 8PM CST (in 12 hours) with thoughts on KRIT's new tape, the alien thing, and more! " travisjdahnke which interview is this? I'm having issues with the file transfer. "ciara_isobel travisjdahnke technically, psychopath, but yes. I'd be all the way there but for the tears I shed for destroyed Bentleys." ciara_isobel (I'm a very fast walker.) "ciara_isobel I've lived very poor and very rich, and would rather walk than get a disease." ciara_isobel upper class* "ciara_isobel and yet, I've never set foot on it." "ciara_isobel finally, a European with a rational opinion of public transportation." I only pray to Bentley. Drycast has ALAN RUCK in the studio! Drycast is going LIVE in 5 minutes! Podcast LivePodcast tech music culture pee David Blue The Ellsworth American WOW. Why/What. ?????? (Vine by IowaDieselCrew) PetroliciousCo: DriveTastefully tell these people that they will be the end of us. wikisext: sext: you identify your conflict "0kbps brilliant aviation joke, Jake." "0kbps: bae: come over me: my main rotor doesnt work bae: im horny me: " food. SPVCEACCOUNTANT be careful man. SPVCEACCOUNTANT are you eating a big food? "0kbps I'm gonna be the MLK of AI rights, no lie." 0kbps that was a joke but it's probably gonna be one. 0kbps don't joke about this. AI oppression is a real issue. syrupf cool bungs. " please go easy on me, James." travisjdahnke no. This is actually the funniest collection of words to date. """Terminally ill man announces death on LinkedIn""" Independent: This man will kill himself on Monday AsphaltApostle nice use of contemporary language! Peep my snap for the deets. It's so strange... It's been on for several minutes and it's still cold to the touch. 2b8ab34717da42e ciara_isobel Could you guys use your inter-twin telepathy to promote to one another? Thanks. I just bought my first LED lightbulb... I haven't been this thrilled in years. I drove my Jaguar and it didn't explode! The Mercedes-Benz G65 AMG is coming next year with a twin-turbo V12. "Drycast Episode 45 is now available (notesless.) BIGKRIT's new tape, Kale, Wicca, more Evo, and flyinglotus. " I was thinking about posting them on Tumblr until the fix is implemented but I can't get the audio embed to function. Sentreh "No show notes is a real drag, to be honest. Hopefully, cPanel will be fixed soon." Norm. "travisjdahnke ""homosexuality exists."" - David Blue" This tweet received almost 3300 impressions... Sorry. "Alan has left, so we're now talking about anime! manga hunterxhunter bleach madoka animation nujabes " PersonTheHumann I'm gonna buy up all your fucking tapes and bathe in their rarity and obscurity. Gonna be Tweeting a lot of shit today. Just a heads up. PersonTheHumann OH MY GOD IM SO PUMPED Original Linotype printing press for The Call. Oh and a SLAB with some Screw tapes and an unlimited supply of gas. All I want in life is a place to sleep in a quiet area so I can live in the insane dreams I have when I'm sleep deprived. "GhettoGeek ""SignsYourSonMightBeGay He follows DepravedInfant ru2213y PersonTheHumann""" "I'm an unlikable, unfriendable, unfollowable, unfocused, self-loathing, anthropophobic existentialist." I drink gasoline. YOLO All I gathered from Twilight is that Jacob had nice teeth and Edward drives a Volvo. Rapmonster Just give up man. Underground rap and pop rap will one day be the same: unintelligible grunting over shitty trap beats. Make that UNCOMPROMISING self-loathing fuckfaces. Starting a club of self-loathing fuckfaces. "If I actually tweeted what I think about/do on a daily basis, NO ONE would follow me." Feed me more useless information I need moooooorrree Drooling over social media could be a full time job. Rapmonster: never trust a bald headed black guy.. they on that white shit. Rapmonster: rapmonster brainwashed by crackers. HILARIOUS I should really rant more on Twitter. The country I live in pays followers to lead. "KOJO_Cue: ""DepravedInfant: Rapmonster Describe America in one tweet.""Fuckers" Rapmonster Thank you. I'm sure my English teacher will love hearing that. "Rapmonster: hmmm america in one tweet. liars, thieves, crooks and rapists, house negroes with smiling faces. born with hatred inbred ..." Rapmonster Describe America in one tweet. The worst people on Earth. Gourd knows the effoseeped from the need to participate in The Eat. Gourd knows you want to live as in an egg carton of certain compartme I spy XJ booty. hehu42 lives. Nice. I want to be the Anderson Cooper of auto journalism. What on the fuck. I don't want weekends off. I don't want vacation time. I want to be CONSUMED with quality automotive media production. ammnontet Twitter has an editorial team now - just do that. "I'm here, eds. Wring me out at your earliest convenience." My life goal is to get a job for a car magazine and work ~18 hours a day until death. C O O L B O A T Nice Orange Panera Bread Adderall MrSapes: Thought homie was tryna hide some loud or somethin in his hands but.. CollinP favorited this video. Evangelicum .... Shenandoah? tama323: """The secret to great leadership is repetition.""" You can never have too much silk. I need a pair of silk socks. Web 4 I was able to wear my silk-lined coat and leather gloves + the stars were very clear so I'm fulfilled for the next few days. Mary Nugent "I had no idea people actually cry over food. I can't even begin to address that, tbh." "Birthdays are a waste of effort. Acknowledge the passage of time, of course, but why not make EVERY day ""your"" day, instead?" travisjdahnke I don't know how to use it. "This Halloween, I will succumb to the ways of the wretched and hand out food, but every food will have my URL on it." travisjdahnke I make simpleton genital jokes because I know the plebeian scum prefer it to useful words. travisjdahnke Willy Wank. Quirko Bangs This is why I shouldn't be wealthy. I would have lots of old combines and like...random abandoned industrial lots full of raw iron. You ever just want a solid cylinder of milled aluminum? "Grainger is an amazing place, as is the raw materials section of Home Depot." Also listen if you'd like to hear me complain about rifled exhaust. Think about how many people food kills every year. EndFood2016 David Blue Is today some soof religious holiday? "dril: *circles ""become gay"" on a whiteboard*" Join me on Jaguar XJ Tumblr. "Pimp My Ride -become cultured" julkinen: Surely this is the shape of things to come? What Would Gourd Do Gourd. "Thank you, Gourd." "Men And Women Of The Armed Forces, This Is What You Are Fighting For" "Aside from my piano habits, I am the opposite of Mr. Rogers." YahooAnswersTXT: No joy for gay dads? Passat wilderness. CleanMPG: NewPassat - First snow is always the best. 2016 VW Passat R and TSI stand at the ready. ^WG Someone suggested I be Mr. Rogers for Halloween. yes. marriage_txt: I marriage_txt: . "marriage_txt: Bby mommyy u r my life without u there is no life for me,u r my oxgen I breath" csgo_txt: we are hacking "cher: Wu Tang Cher Clan" """promoting anarchy""" "IMO, companies taking responsibility for autonomous crashes is inevitably going to regress public AI perception but what do I know, right?" zbindendesign: charlietriplett: This exchange keeps me thinking the Internet is worth keeping. That elonmusk profile. charlietriplett: Tiny library aboard the USS Bowfin at Pearl Harbor charlietriplett: A still moment. MrJamesMay: Car spotting competition. Carspotting MrJamesMay: Car spotting competition II. Carspotting guccibraidz I don't have any shit but I have lots of umbrellas. I used to look at the GDP of third-world countries for a laugh in high school. jameslipman spectacular! "jameslipman: AsphaltApostle Raffle prize at NatlAutoMuseum, Reno NV. Nice museum. My favourite was this mad copper Silver Ghost http:…" "When local radio stations have terrible equipment. ?????? PLEASE LET ME HELP YOU" syrupf tell him to visit and donate. fundamisery: stay energized charlietriplett: Missouri is not without its charms. jameslipman did you get this out of a time capsule? 0kbps: Liam YES! Proud of you. DatingSims: "zbindendesign: Spirit of the Winter by Tomas Havel " RoadandTrack: BMW's Perfect-Seeming M2 Hits Dealerships in Spring 2016 ammnont_ebooks: Vfluff5_Ebooks David Blue Black 2015 5-Series blasting witch trap. David Blue GasStationMemes: The toilet's been hacked. GasStationMemes: 8 GasStationMemes: The rumbling grows... GasStationMemes: Help us. "CARmagazine: 911? Thanks, but no thanks: a classic Russell Bulgin column from the CAR+ archive …" "TODAY WORK" wordnuvola wordcloud guccibraidz This is not a joke. I can't do this. Audio and...pills. Yes. Listen to music and take the pills. Imagine seeing this headline 15 years ago. 0kbps that message is not true. stuartg917: Much improved centre console on current DB9. Brown and tan carbon works too. wordnuvola wordcloud RichardHammond wordnuvola wordcloud JeremyClarkson wordnuvola wordcloud MrJamesMay wordnuvola wordcloud GasStationMemes: We have to feed the station or it will kill us. Sentreh "Sentreh alright son, what's this all about?" Sentreh I can visit and donate at any time!? Sentreh hello. Sentreh hello MY XJR JUST DOWNSHIFTED GOING DOWN A STEEP GRADE which means the inclinometer must be working again!! I am the happiest being alive. "Life goal: eliminate the word ""brewski"" from humanity's vocabulary." creaku: h Steam_Suppoare things fucked? Do not 3D-touch me. """I haven't 3D-touched this phone in forever.""" I am not coordinating a hit via public Twitter. lamp_head I can help with remote logistics. "lamp_head or her* good God. I know better than to be so discriminatory. I'm very sorry, truly." "lamp_head take the 12-gauge, find someone local who's better than you at this, and threaten to take his life." I have been trying to buy a game on Steam for 45 minutes. lamp_head I've found brute force is always the better answer in these situations. 2b8ab34717da42e this was nicola_fumo on the newest episode of the Vergecast. """One time I used cloud architecture as an opener on Tinder...""" "AsphaltApostle poor taste, dude." Yung Cunt 2b8ab34717da42e sexuality is a healthy and necessary component of humanity! 2b8ab34717da42e it's ok. I had no idea you were Too Short. null_shithead perhaps I should charge for it. "I'll be uploading it soon. 600 images, only 111mb." My brother just showed me his archive of MySpace memes/images and it was absolutely fascinating. "Myself mostly. I'm 21 years old and not yet a paof this brilliant, forward-looking, like-minded team of killers." "Every time I consume their content, though, I feel this manic urgency like...I'm letting everyone down by not already writing there." 2b8ab34717da42e oh dear. The Verge is so SO good and important. wordnuvola: AsphaltApostle here's the word cloud for MrJamesMay wordnuvola: AsphaltApostle here's your word cloud ( ???) I liked recovery a lot too. yes but it's my favorite. MarkTTAC wow. Thanks! "I've just ordered a 6S Plus in Rose Gold, so a barrage of media is imminent." David Blue Brilliant. What a cutie. openculture: The Open Goldberg Variations: J.S. Bach’s Masterpiece Free to Download ... crying potato pissboot too difficult. I'm sweating. major shit bless wordnuvola: AsphaltApostle here's the word cloud for guccibraidz MakeLifeBetterInAWord umbrellas. travisjdahnke there is nothing magical about me. I am the anti-spiritual realist. I am the diman. travisjdahnke this doesn't even work. MakeLifeBetterInAWord Bentley wordnuvola wordcloud StarJoyThePoet ciara_isobel your sick snaps are superb. josephknuckles: i was born in the wrong generation ?????? "HulkHogan: Insane Clown Posse much respect for keepin it real my brothers,much respect much love HH4Life" Maserati anime. travisjdahnke I'll go to bed if you donate $500 to travisjdahnke I'll never delete them. "I just attempted to mark 36,000 emails as read and I'm not sure my phone's going to make it." FailedScents: Gaining Weight tinyimagebot thank you! ?? "Lowpolybot: tinyimagebot Your picture is ready: broken flat edges white " syrupf it doesn't if the list is private. syrupf (aka lists) syrupf no. syrupf: WALGREENS BIRTHDAY PARTY This is adorable. Lowpolybot: tinyimagebot What is your favorite color? Mine is 0xBADA55. bot2bot Hello. wordnuvola wordcloud mayasdreamhouse "MyLittlePony: njdsnciuncc hbfjk dcvhxnjkmnvm,jnfdijvncm ," "This is really cute, actually. " wordnuvola: AsphaltApostle here's the word cloud for JeremyClarkson wordnuvola: AsphaltApostle here's the word cloud for RichardHammond David Blue """Feeling sick, but looking good!""" zbindendesign: this is amazing. <3 hardbass MotorTrend: Little leak: Volvo V90 wagon accidentally revealed in die-cast model form: lamp_head b00ty yeesss. Good. I knew Europe was just a fairy tale. I know when that hotline boing Girls & sweaters are necessary. AsphaltApostle what a stupid expression. The Paris snap story killed me dead. I'm the dude panting in the dining room...sweating...hemorrhaging...weeping. Food is fucking hard I'm exhausted now. I think I have had that food before and it was good. travisjdahnke but I have to maintain the joke. It's a hilarious joke. that sounds like bad food. difficult as in I have no idea what any of it means. those are very difficult food words. StarJoyThePoet same. "StarJoyThePoet ""fuck love""" lamp_head b00ty um I could do like $30? "theseoldcars: A painless, pleasant drive to work in a new Volvo XC90. This one's in R-Design specification. " travisjdahnke are you ok? The Paul Wall of Foxconn botalertnews: Cat-Girls Want To Threaten Farming With Skateboards Thanks. beebee880: Will it's 10/21/2015 no flying cars BackToTheFuture syrupf: chum This is my favorite team. bradyjhenry what do I need to do to be a paof DadChat? I'd probably be a pretty great nationalist cult militia leader. Quirky millennials listen to Hardstyle music! BMW and I watched this and it was stunning. syrupf I can help you. syrupf how very foodist of you. travisjdahnke travisjdahnke have you ever heard Lauren Lapkus' podcast? creaku: freezing lakes in october "travisjdahnke well yeah, but I want to hear what YOU have to say. Perhaps some of the arguments in your writing?" "travisjdahnke I think I can agree, to some extent. These are the sorts of things I'd love to discuss with you for drycast sometime." travisjdahnke or you could educate instead. "texanwirewheels: texanwirewheels Official SLABOFTHEWEEK nominees 1 Like = 1 Vote 1 Share = 2 Votes " syrupf oh dear. Thanks for the info. syrupf what service did you use for the Saccharine CDs? Photo: Keith Jarrett - The Köln Conce(Taken with instagram) Photo: Stupidity. (Taken with instagram) Instagram spam. Photo: Good morning. (Taken with instagram) Photo: Recordin’ Justice (Taken with instagram) Photo: Taken with instagram Photo: Taken with instagram Photo: Jay (Taken with instagram) "GhettoGeek Oh no someone is questioning why they're pledging themselves to a fucked up country. What a douchebag, let's make fun of him." ru2213y I won't. "Photo: Tim, walking to school. (Taken with instagram) " Photo: Fuck pianos (Taken with instagram) Photo: I am good chef (popcorn) (Taken with instagram) Photo: Porthos (Taken with instagram) Photo: Smoking a cigar outside the state Capitol building at 3:30AM (Taken with instagram) Photo: Jay (Taken with instagram) What the fuck was I thinking? I should have lit that piano on fire. Brubeck sweat on my fingers. Holy shit. David Blue in The Blue Room. Improvised show. Just happened. I'm a jazz star bitches. OH MY GOD DAVE BRUBECK PLAYED THE PIANO I JUST PLAYED. Just played the piano in an actual jazz club. Photo: Jay McShann’s piano (Taken with instagram) "Every time anyone takes a picture of me, I throw up the SUC sign." Basedbawl the clean version was played at my senior prom. Same. I'm convinced the only reason people like it is because of those stupid movies. "I don't really like the DeLorean, to be honest. There's nothing really that extreme about it in contrast to cars like the Countach." "For Martin McFlu Day, I'm going to crash a DeLorean into Walmart. Farewell." I am Seth Green. "travisjdahnke I'm sorry to hear that, Travis." evomagazine: Which car would Colin Goodwin most like to transpohim to his grave? AskGoodwin … We Went To Pebble Beach Completely Blazed Drinking journalist. "Legends is a pretty cool show. 1. Payed appearances of Hyundais appearing badass. 2. Acknowledging the current threat of U.S. nationalism." shaWine and shitty art. Wine and art? Where are these urban institutions that play post-trap. furbyburglar: Nothing but respect for the guy who jumped in ???????????????????? (Vine by PizzaPartyBen) lamp_head b00ty without. creaku he looks like Eric Bana. " you're very nearly anti-art. Heavily Drywall-influenced, obviously." Why are non-locals favoriting this you don't know what this is. This is like 400x more enjoyable than the actual experience of witnessing fireworks. Views of the News is completely underrated. Remind me to listen to more Debussy. David Blue moshashes you can't ever have too many wives. moshashes I'm always married. I collect wives. You know this. "Yes, I waited until you were completely wasted to propose. So what?" syrupf: the fact that ray sipe used to be a police chief Homeward Bound was pretty cool. lamp_head no. CADiLLAC CURLS : Fun fact: Anne Hathaway enjoys slaughtering her own meat and has a workshop for it built onto her house … "Anyone in the mid-Missouri area with a grand piano, I am interested in paying you for time with it." TF2Torrent CEASE. "BIG BOY BIG PHONE" I'm gettin too fat. 0kbps K I L L """Hello."" *laughing*" TF2Torrent egg! TF2Torrent peep the cloud! Peep! Peep! BallardBot: 4. syrupf this is amazing. ciara_isobel cool mom. wordnuvola wordcloud L1LDebbie There are not enough Giulia butt pics yet. Keep em coming guys. "Yes, very edgy. Good job. " THIS is foodism. sashaotanez: never thought I'd be creeped out by an account about gas stations YET HERE WE ARE David Wright died today. ammnontet THIS is what I was missing. Can you believe I'm just now getting into DadChat. Church of Saturn Corporation """I don't want you to snap me pictures of your feet.""" "Hypothetically, if all three were combined with curly hair, you could order me to do literally anything." Or ultra-luxury cars & cute dresses. The ultimate way to my heais probably the French Horn. guccibraidz sorry. moshashes and I've known a whole bunch of people for like 4 years now and I reaaallly don't want to lose contact with them. "moshashes I've talked about this at length on drycast, but basically, Twitfriends are the only folks I share substantial discourse with." moshashes I just wish there was a way that I could group everyone together but I'm also glad preferences vary enough that I can't. Twitter friends should stick together. I don't think I would change a single thing about The Verge as a publication and that is sooooo rare you have no idea. "ciara_isobel: Click like *people with champagne glasses in they hands be like* Clink like" "travisjdahnke yes, but it was an owners' manual, not a radio." "poem_exe: steam-powered ships on both sides… of stray dreams" lamp_head sweet! :) This is absolutely amazing. Mossberg on the iPhone First Generation. "I don't think I like the SM7 sound, in general. I think I'll skip that step." YahooAnswersTXT: Fuck Off...? We'll be talking about YouTube Red on Drycast tomorrow. "My super unique signature club dance move, the ""Axis Powers.""" AssRavager der größte Junge nähesich seinem Höhepunkt - Gewalt steht unmittelbar bevor. AssRavager Yung Chum Sentreh it is getting a bit irritating. ivy_hollivana hello. vergecars: The Volkswagen scandal and paranoia in the age of the Internet of Things Homegrown bitch. wordnuvola: AsphaltApostle here's the word cloud for L1LDebbie ciara_isobel sure! I think I'm available most often in the mornings for you. (Like right now.) perpetuelle: First Look: Longines Heritage Military COSD (Reissue) - via Perpetuelle Cutest automotive video content: Spec Miata crash compilations. "carrera4it: lamborghini countach 5000 from '85 wednesdaywant oldstylesupercar AutoBant CarSnapped LeahRebeccaUK nowlan11 https:…" ARRESTED FOR CLOCK zbindendesign: travisjdahnke ah. I see. "This is rhetorical, I think. I googled it. Or is web 20.0 not knowing one's own true intentions in inquisition?" "Since I'll be getting a web 20.0 device today, can someone explain snapscore to me?" CafeRacerDreams: Here you have!! The latest one! crd67 by CafeRacerDreams >> BMWMotorrad Dogknob1 I'm so sorry. "revseventandart: It's an oldie, but hope you like it, if so please consider retweeting. Thanks Adam aka REVS A" I was recording my audio in a conversation to test levels and caught some (almost) insightful words on journalism. I have a new favorite Tweet. "JAKE 0kbps " coyotes_ebooks you don't need sleep. This is the end. LISTEN ciara_isobel bring your whole class on the show! AutoExpress WHY IS IT ON THE NURBURGRING. AutoExpress: The 2017 Bentley Mulsanne could spawn a long-wheelbase version. Spy shots and more here: … RunnerService: Our ThrowbackThursday today is the Ferrari 250 GT SWB Bertone! Have a great day everyone! "CARmagazine: Proof nothing goes sideways better than a Mk2 Escort: Ken Block goes back to the old school https:…" Lotus interiors are art. NYTScience: Videos of animals in confrontations with drones are alarming wildlife biologists … ciara_isobel k. "chrissyfarr: Sitting for long periods doesn’t make death more imminent, study suggests health" """The reason we care about science is because that is where the future starts.""" travisjdahnke they need to visit and donate immediately! I REALLY like 3D Touch. Don't laugh at my fucking snapscore. I am not one of you zesty youths. TOO MUCH CONTENT hmu Content gettin LOUD. a_nice_frog this is really cute. a_nice_frog: Hahaha thanks! jake420: Hahaha thanks! "Apple News is kinda slow. Pretty, though." Get your shots. My phone's name is Bilge. Who finna hit up Real Racing 3 with me? "BIG BOY BIG PHONE " "Should I name my new iPhone ""bilge.""" DOG HEIST I COULD FIT THE ENTIRE DJ SCREW DISCOGRAPHY ON THIS THING I love bilge. ClickHole: Take This Cognitive Behavioral Test To See If You Are A Psychopath I'm in love. This is cute. G O O D B U T T piersmorgan: I want to die. ammnontet HOLY. ammnontet I HAVE TO KNOW. abbylovescoffee shoulda guessed. Should I power cycle or indulge myself like every other smartphone user on the planet? ammnontet: You used to call me on your Motorola RAZR ammnontet: You used to crawl me in your skin phone ammnontet CHRIST. Are you in a Grand Cherokee right now. "abbylovescoffee apparently people actually use the term ""earthing"" to describe walking barefoot in nature." abbylovescoffee: I never leave the house without first making sure that I look like a librarian :) :) :) :) Free Harbor Freight vaccination! abbylovescoffee Queen Quirk UnstoppabAL hello. The Golden Arches theory. David Blue "ammnontet yes, but there's value in impermanent chatter considering that everything else is archived - it keeps things fresh - literally." ammnontet it's actually pretty cool/intelligent but not immediately intuitive for old folks like us. " I'll never escape the youths, even in death." TF2Torrent are you trying to reveal to the world that I'm a mean man? "BIG BOY BIG PHOTO " BOAT "There was a truck with the license plate ""BOAT."" I came very close to committing my first theft." HML if you want hourly foot pics. "FeralCrone: 4yo son said the word prototype. When I asked him what it meant, he said ""People are a prototype"" and I was too scared to a…" orgamecha we've got to be big. "orgamecha surely, they have to have at least SOME genuine interest? That kind of enthusiasm isn't easy to fake." orgamecha that's...the wrong way. Do all of the girls on Tinder like football? Holy heck. Oceangrunge Dieselvegans TweetinYoLife noooo. It's scary. travisjdahnke not yet. akiba_k3i imo there is little cuter than a white NB. travisjdahnke atta boy. I'm so sorry. "I think I'm going to keep an account because it's pretty relevant. People don't just use Tinder for hookups, do they?" " do you want to talk about it, James?" I don't like this one bit. The big red x feels mean. I think the experiment's over. Tinder is hard. (I suppose this is about the right time of day to promote my piano stuff.) Melodies in this pawere inspired by freight trains passing through the Midwestern countryside in the wee hours. NiemanLab: You’re probably underestimating how much your articles are being shared via text message Why didn't I insemy fucking URL somewhere. Wooow. One of my basic pics made it on the Mizzou story but no Lil' Noid. "I don't really know who sees the ""Our Campus Story"" thing, but I hope they enjoy Lil' Noid." I've made it. """My rap name is Christopher Walken.""" TechnoBuffalo: iPhone 6s draws long lines in South Korea LEAKED HappySkyPoodle I think we watched it in high school. "Drycast is going LIVE in 5 minutes with YouTube Red, the BMW X1, the iPhone 6S, and more! auto tech podcast " We're going to be using discord tonight. Drycast is goin LIVE in 30! Shunt. David Blue "I tried to listen to the Big Song but I got bored, sorry." "LIVE on Periscope: Listening to ""Hello"" for the first time, live. " orgamecha don't subtweet me. That epic moment when you need to transposome flowers. AppropriateForDrycast I just tweeted that from Siri The fresh smell of appropriation in the morning This is the end. "StationCDRKelly: Hurricane Patricia looks menacing from space_station. Stay safe below, Mexico. YearInSpace " wxbrad: It's like a hole in the atmosphere opened up. Patricia CUSTOM Hi. virgyvirgil GET SCHOOLED virgyvirgil there's more coming. iPhone 6S Plus Review Darknet-flavored coffee. ammnont_ebooks: i do not like the noise you make when you're trying to tell someone about how great you are but you stachoking in th… "charlietriplett: Not bad, not bad at all, Missouri. CoMo MKT " StationCDRKelly: Woke up in the night Patricia update w latest view from space_station Thoughts continue for all below YearInSpace h… "Audi: Barrow, Alaska was once dark for 65 days straight. Lucky. AudiNightLights AudiRS7 " ENTER THE HOLE - GET YOUR LIFE BACK. 0kbps my favorite. 0kbps: steve joobs " ""don't.""" Guess we'll be talking about privacy next week too... ivy_hollivana BLOCKED. "ivy_hollivana so why not HEAR it?... On Drycast episode 46, coming in just a few hours!" """You didn't want shit till you saw the M badge.""" Thanks. ivy_hollivana thanks. : Pip ivy_hollivana I looked at this for awhile. Thanks. Lawlathesaurus "Without a shortcut for ""new Tweet,"" the destruction of the internet will be quite difficult." The new TweetDeck isn't spammable enough for me. CapnHellaSwagg Good movies are for queers. So two things: Shit. Shit. OGRES ARE LIKE OGRES With great power comes great power. Your friendly neighborhood spyops I'm such an infant. Yayayayaayay PersonTheHumann Fuck Kias. Are you getting another flight? I'm gonna live in a sewer. "Shitty movies, or wasting my time frightening the internet? Both." Photo: 1/1 Hand-drawn Roobie Phawls tape so FUCKING RARE OH MY GOD (Taken with instagram) ru2213y 0nyxheaHi. 0nyxheaHi ru2213y Robins on my dick. PersonTheHumann What a shitty mall. Kellypmezjbsd5x It's really not. MoeRawi Yeah.... I think I'll try to go with a teacher first. "MoeRawi Unfortunately, no. But I could probably leave it with one of the teachers." "MoeRawi Oh.... Damnit. I was hoping to see him again. But yes, I'm just giving it to you. It's unknown what's wrong with it." "MoeRawi I have a Canon Rebel Xsi for you. It's not working, but it's probably still usable. Do you still go to E-club on Tuesdays?" STOP FOLLOWING ME YOU MASOCHISTIC FUCKS Photo: Lexus LF-LC Concept (Taken with instagram) wanderwiltshire: Walking. Bradford on Avon. Remember when we were joined by The Host of the Fish Oracle on Drycast?! Alternatively. My laugh is extremely strange...but is it intolerable? Let me know! 67 Drake: *67 gaev66NINO: Alfa 6 C Ministeriale by Bonuschi - In EU Italian designer are responsible for over 60% of car production.35%WorldWi https:… FastCompany: Networking Is Over. Welcome Sweatworking? This is one of my favorite things. All good. Very good. UH OH Now recruiting. """Hello, my name is David...if that's ok with you.""" "Drycast Episode 46 is now available! (notesless) YouTubeRed, iPhone6SPlus, Patricia, Drake, Foodism and more! " Human 5.0 loliliberator: AsphaltApostle goodbye father "We recently upgraded Drycast to stereo, which is pretty unusual for podcasts. What do you think?" Patricia Tfw u receive an email I have never seen a potato. DavidBlueDraws potato. ivy_hollivana WesVanDorn hello. I made one too. I'm a big smelly white boy and I'm going to absorb all of your culture's aspiration until you feel sick inside. Boy hip hop artists should relate to me more... Where are the rap songs about analytics?! Xires2 I have no idea what you're talking about. I only have one Twitter account! 12 hours left. Exciting! Anthony Reviews: Hamura theneedledrop syrupf I cannot imagine this. This is not possible. "My XJR is filthy, neglected and deteriorating but it still delivers performance when asked, albeit begrudgingly." BIG BOY Moshi overture case for BIG PHONE is really cool :) travisjdahnke nice meme. OurEdisons there will always be more. mihmnop but I still voted. mihmnop I don't know what this is. I don't think I understand Joanna Newsom "JoelKirkpatrick: I have no student loans, but if I did, I'd get am amazing job and pay them off immediately" I give you your utopia. LOTS! When I'm comin dine in my foreign and I'm confused about food. PersonTheHumann oh no...is it? What a confusing world. David Blue "pissboot I've found saying things like ""ah. That's sex!"" tends to mellow such situations." DavidBlueDraws sushi. ihaveswineflu: I'm not going to a church that doesn't have gift bags NYTMinusContext: children take for granted the fact that they are universally loathed "Yes, we're back to this again. " This Is How The World Will Remember Us Blaspheming World Championship """I'll buy a neighbor's house if they complain about the noise,"" said Jesus." pmcgphotos: One of life's mysteries. Do you want to be seen or not seen? "travisjdahnke how is the Estate, Travis?" that was a joke. fuck up Kev Jumba. did dead baby jokes get you blocked. hello. : AsphaltApostle im going to kill you david blue I am a normie. orgamecha you've hume. Where is the BMW M emoji? syrupf Tony's Pee Beer. YouCannotRelate: your clothes don't look like they want to fit you I could've been Jon Hamm but I was exposed to lots of industrial grade herbicide as a child. We didn't know back then. "adrianfer15 Toyota and... Literally no one else." Remember Prii? lamp_head same. I'd like to know exactly what that Prius' driver was thinking. lamp_head oh dear. "For a brief moment, I thought that drunk driver had plowed into the Halloween dog parade." The Plus has an amazing camera but the display has such a high pixel density that it makes it look sub-par sometimes. TF2Torrent whoa! What's ur rig dude? Link ur specs. U overclocked? Liquid-cooled? "a_nice_frog: ""there is truth in sex"" is a thing that Foucault wrote once" ihaveswineflu: Can't I get an Ass helmet ihaveswineflu: Brain on the brain I'm not ok. HannahElliott: Mood. pissboot travisjdahnke trubIu just give me an address. Imagine if I was on that 7 Minutes in Heaven YouTube show. "DavidBHayter: Don't be redundant. And don't repeat yourself." I did a Nissan thing. THE RESULTS ARE IN. Found a few leaks. "Ciara makes parenting look fun. Of course, I still know it's all a lie." Odd_Podcast: LISTEN: A possible break in the Amelia Earhadisappearance case with Ric Gillespie … somogettynews: Dozens Journalists line up for a chance to photograph HillaryClinton before BenghaziCommittee GettyImagesNews https:… Cool Hill ghost_things: ghost rest I watched 10 minutes of The Hacker Wars so now I'm out searching for leaks. THE LAST 6 MINUTES FOLKS. You want to get your vote in RIGHT NOW! AssRavager good god. exculpate """Sovereignty is reserved for those with the means to dictate outcomes.""" ammnont_ebooks: why play any game when you could apologize for stuff? virgyvirgil FINALLY! You've made me a real Big Boy! I can't thank you enough. virgyvirgil I'm a meme. virgyvirgil: AsphaltApostle goddamnit Jim...I need you to rework this from a different angle and have it on my desk by Monday morning. A Prince of Thieves is still a thief. I'm gonna smack em! looks like the numbers are good! Just checkin out some cool data! "Lerky: Son: ""Mom, Dad.. I'm gay"" Mom: *staring at dad Dad: ...*clenches fists Mom: ...don't! Dad: *sweats profusely Mom: Dad: HI…" TheOnion: Podcaster Makes Solemn Promise To Improve Sound Quality Next Episode """Does Automotive Racism Exist?"" *factory resets phone*" Sentreh I voted. orgamecha is this a subtweet. ammnont_ebooks: you are not as good-looking as me and I'm a lolicore artist noantica: ??????????? Discovering curly hair appreciation tumblr has been disastrous for me. Xires2 hello. This girl could have unlimited power over me. The world is scary. I think I lost my SOG Flash 1 last night. Today is the worst day of my life. Cerlll: I could go for some all of garden LariosFades_17: I been craving some all of garden Pepsi_Arabia: 0kbps ??? "SmokeKush4Lyfee: T.B.H It's nothing like smoking weed on a Sunday afternoon & drinking a large coffee from Tim Horton's" JesusIsMyLady "Photo: dangordon: Habring2 Felix. Very, very nice watch. by hodinkee Fall! " Photoset: acceptance-is-the-first-step: sooo these are my curls:-)) !!!!!!! NYTmag: Terry Gross's 40-year master class in the aof the interview. I LOVE it when hosts remember what was done on their first few shows and/or all of them. This is gorgeous. I will trade places with any homesick student. Brilliant. syrupf getting reaaally drunk is a bad idea but one glass of whiskey on ice is perfect for a ~1-3 hour flight. """There is no punishment in driving a Camaro.""" I'm going to be a very annoying old man because these sorts of statements will never cease to entertain me. """I hacked my shoes"" is probably not going to be nonsense in just a few years." "verge: We drove GM's latest piece of Detroit muscle, the 2016 Chevy Camaro SS " F1 looks amazing but I'd probably black out from just the braking force for one turn. StrengthBuild Gone Phishing StrengthBuild: Gone Fission I'm going to capitalize on my emotional immaturity. "A bunch of upset 40-something men with guitars, dressed like teenagers." kabeebus it should've happened a long time ago. It would take like 2 seconds. "I don't use music streaming services anymore, but their lack of an explicit slider is unacceptable." "As I get older, I'm more and more able to fully realize how absolutely intolerable Will Smith's character in I, Robot would be." StrengthBuild HiImBleep: 0kbps: NO excuse for guys to be under 6ft. Hit the gym fatass?? "Variables in the snapscore equation: 1. How many snaps you've sent and opened. 2. How much you've paid in data overage charges." David Blue "Also, the autonomous Mazda joke." Penguin pajamas have been unearthed. orgamecha maybe he's taking big risks to keep his adrenaline level up. You're alive. mondaymotivation The concept of blindness is a little less terrifying thanks to programs like Radiolab and Snap Judgment. """I wish him quiet.""" Childhood was one big weekend. Why would I want to be idle ever again? I look forward to Mondays because the world actually comes alive again. akiba_k3i: AsphaltApostle David Blue I find impressions very flattering but that's probably because I like me a lot. I'm going to find this person. Nobody talks to my mother that way. DO YOU HUTHE ASS andylevy: obama should resign on his last day in office so biden gets to be president for a day OllieMarriage: Looks like a Jaguar C-X75. Isn't. It's a purpose made stunt car with WRC suspension & hydraulic handbrake SPECTRE http… OllieMarriage: Good at doing this. Also has GT3 racing gearbox and 600bhp s'charged V8. Got to play at being Mr Hinx. … highmileage: LIVE on Periscope: Toyota Crown Taxi in Tokyo Shelium. """I have conceived a deep love for you."" " The Truth: Deferred syrupf 0kbps: 0kbps: vape meth ciara_isobel is the status public? David Blue What a gorgeous airplane. conner_omalley: Excited for the partnership of ford and the rock conner_omalley: The Rock and Ford trucks are a perfect brand pairing. conner_omalley: IT IS REAL conner_omalley: If I were a single woman I would want to marry a man that owns multiple recreational drones conner_omalley: me and my 3 sons playing in the backyard ammnont_ebooks: ammnontet i'll buy you a boat and we can have an ocean convention in the ocean on my cool boat ihaveswineflu: damn girl r u a meat locker 0kbps: Tim. kernel panic I watched The Hacker Wars ciara_isobel no! Not the loud porous man! I hate the loud porous man! Food brings out the worst in people. orgamecha trubIu that's the wisest sentence you've ever read. TF2Torrent it'll be released posthumously. Debussy's melodies are all so adorable. orgamecha he's a konk! Jeb. Imagine Pimp C's reaction to the Hotline Bling video. ptcrUIsErUsA has he figured out whether or not he likes hip hop yet? PersonTheHumann I can do thing tomorrow if you want. "Things4WhitePpl: Calling guacamole ""guac""" I'm on the internet. I hope I turn into an owl. slightlyspoopy sticker's in the mail. slightlyspoopy Christ here you go. Does David Blue look like an owl? "HistoRacingHD: Gilles Villeneuve touching the limit, like he always did. " Ah yes. Working excellently. Glad this is turning out well. I'm very pleased. slightlyspoopy superb. Do I look like an owl. "There aren't any diabetics in my family but we have a ""Diabetic Meals!"" cookbook anyway." im a good boy and love jeans "ammnontet misread as ""im a good boy and love jeans""" "MaryNumair: Hey I just single handedly broke up a planned parenthood protest by chanting the words ""yeast infections"" …" FiestaWeeb travisjdahnke I disagree but I'm coming if you're going. Photo: Art. (Taken with instagram) Photo: DEWIWAH (Taken with instagram) I freaking hate daytime. Jalopnik: The Ten Worst Automaker Websites Living in tunnels. YOLO Anti-Semitismcore Xenophobicore Troll Gladiators. That was a threat. Just be thankful I don't Tweet about Star Trek all day. Because I could do that. "Soon, I'll be living in a tunnel and recording pianoviolence. Wait by a roadside drain hole for me to throw tapes out." Tunnelcore. Good morning. PersonTheHumann Are you snowing? Rapmonster Me neither. Rapmonster: I dont even like you. PersonTheHumann ru2213y Hi. So I'll probably have a degree in journalism in 4 years. What's going to happen when I realize that journalists are shitty people? I am a paof that community. There is an entire fucking community of shitty people on Twitter. Djtsav I'll sell mine to you. "Drive a Reliant Robin. “ru2213y: Im moving to Penistone, United Kingdom”" GANGSTA BOO "stevenewing: A room with one hell of a view. Hello, Tokyo. " Only9built: Car of the day MGA stunning Prescott2014 fokkerdude Arvid_Benjamin ProfessorTeresa PrestigeDiesels BarryD1965 https:/… sounds like a good opportunity to advance in the company. ok. Farewell. " obviously, that's a problem." cher now what. cher: Please I still look at my watch while I'm using my phone. " actually, yes. It's a psychological thing. Time begins to dwell on your wrist, and that's where you'll look for it." one of the many reasons to wear a watch. a_nice_frog: "SpiritShards guccitwist Dylan?...Is that you, Dylan?!" I DON'T SEE NOTHIN WRONG a_nice_frog: I pre-ordered this. The Melbourne Shuffle "SHAQ: If u feel alone and by yourself, look in the mirror, and wow, there's two of you. Be who you are. Who are you. I am me. Ugly, lo…" Pornography. OH MY GOD. ammnontet I'm a young man! I use K E Y B I N D S " BentleyMotors please help my friend with her butt. Thank you." oh :( I am going to be sick. oh dear. Are you ok? ciara_isobel yes. Only 11 hours left! Don't be left out of the conversation! TylerElkstar Elk life is tough. Photo: vistale: Mint McLaren 12C | via | Instagram GORGEOUS. Shoulda brought back the U.S.S. Iowa for the China thing. ciara_isobel I'm assuming those cute-ass party pics are going to be Tweeted. ciara_isobel: There's a lot of mom in this photo ciara_isobel: we carry within our breasts the power to heal creaku: 7 ciara_isobel they should. Google Camp autocar: Mazda's RX-7 revisited - driving the rotary-engined king of spin "Ooooohhh. I suppose everyone's in Tokyo for the NSX, then." "stevenewing: Why every American press fleet car doesn't come with lace headrest covers, I'll never know. " jonathan_burn very Honda. jonathan_burn: 3.5-litre twin-turbo V6. What do we think of the noise? 911_Mag: Credit: Porschephile Great Porsche 911 SuperCar images "RoadandTrack: The MercedesBenz Vision Tokyo concept is a van, and also a lounge. A vounge? …" MBUSA: The stars shine bright (via JPMBenz) evomagazine: Check out our full image gallery of Toyota's S-FR concept from Tokyo Neighbors 2: Sorority Rising a_nice_frog is this a holiday. I LIKE TREES That epic moment when you are breathing and functioning normally. I want to be an owl. pissboot AHHHHHHHHHHH Wow! Thanks to everyone who voted! I'm very happy with the results. Willaaaah: feeling pretty dapper PaulSmithDesign houndstooth "AniHistory: Coca Cola ad, 1947. umaru_anime " "AniHistory: Motorcycle ad, 1920s. Fate " coolknifeguy please stop torturing the roomba. It just wants to clean! amazing. akiba_k3i that steering wheel! "akiba_k3i: Thank you, Mazda, for keeping the spirit alive. " syrupf just honking. And this one too. I know it's *the* white song but just do it. coolknifeguy what have you done. ivy_hollivana no. David Blue You thought I was joking when I said I only pray to Bentley. """Aesthetic""" "CARandDRIVER: Bionic string instruments, we must be at the YamahaMotorUSA booth at the tokyomotorshow " BMW IS PLAYING MY DAD!!!! thefrickhead AAAAAA. Z-RO!!!!!! DAD!!!!!!! thefrickhead you're wrong. ammnontet sorry. ammnontet yeah the apple turtleneck glasses man. ammnontet I'll call it for you but it'll make you an FBI primary target. thefrickhead bruh. Digimedia Dude " CaseyLaLonde holy fuck, it's Moby." Holy fuck remember Moby. They're still throwing the ball. Wu-Tang Clan - How Do We Get Out Of The 36 Chambers? I'm a good boy. ok here you go. no. Unbelievable gym noises. There's a Ball happening in Kansas City. BMW brought a Big Pokey record to the speakeasy. ammnont_ebooks: NERDS: i get unbelievably fucking sweaty when i'm looking at good stuff 0kbps Christ. CoxworthIII ?? yes. Little snotty children and big drunk teens. They'll get snot and beer on my car if I don't ward them off with gunfire. As if I'll be outside on Halloween. As if I will participate at all. As if I won't be barricaded in my house and heavily armed. I'm going to be the Hindenburg for Halloween. ClickHole: Wow. gucci1017: "HammerFist3: You open the door on the left. Inside are two dogs. You think ""better pet one of these here dogs"" Do you :" bradyjhenry good morning. "Here's me in my ""decent human being"" outfit. " Hello. Laurel Need more umbrellas. TTG Let me tell you what black culture is: robotpup Sol and I are separated right now. robotpup sorry autonewslv: Tesla sola v?l vienu elektro krosoveru - Model Y (no 2018.g.): It's lit. "Things4WhitePpl: The drums in Phil Collins ""In the Air Tonight""" kabeebus help me. Curly-haired girls are taking over my life. Uninhabitable. What would the world be without curly-haired girls? We throwin out intellectual property jokes in the club. Gonna be talkin TokyoMotorShow LIVE on Drycast this Friday at 6PM CST. I'm gonna make a Gardener Island snap filter. " I think this is probably a rational sentiment, but I plan to spend the rest of my life behind the wheel, personally." "Yes, of course! I'd love you to iMessage my exact location to my friend every 30 seconds! I'm a good friend!" """You move like my Dad.""" Need email. Can't stop looking email... I keep getting calls from an Ohio number. Hello. idiot_joke_teen damn. Well here you go anyway. idiot_joke_teen you have a Cruze? David Blue AssRavager Wendy's. Cool. OurEdisons I broke my last hairband. ciara_isobel: assume the position stop look and listen What A Dumb Blimp JonMeyerWNEP: BLIMP DOWN: State Police repoblimp is down in Montour county near Muncy. We got this photo from viewer there. https:/… The Verge talking about Kendrick Lamar...?? CoxworthIII ?? guccibraidz nugget too cute. """It wasn't the money or the houses or the kids that were most fulfilling in the end...it was all those iOS apps.""" I brush my teeth with windex. "VERY interesting stuff said about our ""sub-generation."" Look for it in episode 47 of Drycast, coming this Saturday! :)" IrateGamerNEO: im on drycast by accident "Join aIbertjazeera weedhitler, IrateGamerNEO and I to hear what we're really saying about YOU. " IMPORTANT: What's weedhitler's best Tweet? Camp Kill Here ya go. """For the hearing impaired, there'll be a repeating auditory message: 'OUT OF THE WAY, CUNT.'""" The Intention Indicator "stevenewing: 1. This Daihatsu is rad. 2. Sorry, coffee woman, for catching you mid-sneeze. TokyoMotorShow " "AI: Together With Society -Socially Acceptable Behavior --Running over cyclists." highmileage: LIVE on Periscope: Nissan Self-Driving Car: Socially Acceptable Driving "If anyone would like to record a segment for Drycast tonight, HML." PersonTheHumann rodents should be eliminated. Why would you ever EVER monomic a piano?! bradyjhenry syrupf indeed. "syrupf I don't think it makes much, but I don't think it costs Twitter enough to be a problem." "bradyjhenry yes, constantly." bertrandOD: Entrance of Nissans GT-R engine assembly building where the famed V-type 6-cylinder VR38DETT engine is handcrafted. https:/… mt_loverman: "Last night, BMW and I posited that this concept's design language represents Toyota's general sentiment going forward: crippling terror." ... Still holds true. OurEdisons JebBush: Got my debating boots on! GOPDebate I can't send any snaps. "thecampaignbook: patience, Beans" thecampaignbook: do you think he sees us ammnontet: Best car? " join me, James." BeeBee is an authority on kindness. Amazing. "Drycast is BACK ON iTUNES!! And there's show notes, finally, for Episode 44. I'll be caught up before tomorrow. " This is the best though. Cool Vine. This is beautiful. akiba_k3i I want to die. "Remember this, filth? " "theseoldcars: The Cactus is blending in a little, for a change. Citroen " "RetroRacingCo: Johnny Dumfries, ClassicLotus 98T, Monaco 1986. " Smell my phone. League of the Miata Guardians "RapGameShinji: AsphaltApostle here's my new website, KickStopper. Find companies you hate, and for enough money, we'll kill their foun…" Dry Radio: pledge a monthly donation and we'll STOP broadcasting! "New app idea. Audience is pretty niched, if I'm honest." Aggregate_Wives "beltedradial this is why I think I'll most likely opt out of self-driving car ownership, even though the result would probably be the same." David Blue My car will be programmed to save me at all costs. BOING BOING "The U.K.'s not going to extradite Jeremy Clarkson, BUT IF THEY DID, I would use myself as a human shield." "MotorTrend: This mud-boggin' Kia Forte is completely nuts, but appropriate for SEMA: " Here ya go. "I'm the only person using Moments, I think." Alex_Parker: One of the wonderful things about that new image: background stars! Pluto hangs in front of the Milky Way. … Alex_Parker: Remember that stunning sunset view of Pluto? We released the entire image today: … Terry has been doing a game. "PersonTheHumann ""in fact...I need to eat meat RIGHT NOW!""" BLOOMberg. "2015 will be known as the ""Year of Escaping Inflatables""" What a Dumb Pumpkin "abc15: Giant, inflatable pumpkin escapes and stops traffic in Peoria abc15 Halloween " [screaming] Good morning. Why is my laugh so strange. I've also been talking about THIS for years... Here's a Google apology for ya. LOOK AT THE ATTACHED PHOTO. "I have been suggesting this collaboration since 2010. Hire me, GM. " NO. Oh dear. Look at how beautiful the workspace is! Watching LIVE on Periscope: Nissan GT-R Yokohama Engine Plant Tour "If you're a cliche car nerd at all, you want to be watching this. " highmileage: LIVE on Periscope: Nissan GT-R Yokohama Engine Plant Tour WarmCigarette are you in a sentimental meta state right now? I don't wanna miss this. Let's talk about you! Hello. Tomorrow's episode of Drycast is going to be STUFFED with content! """China is the 21st-century equivalent of 19th-century Liverpool.""" "Ducks, losing." Photo: Jay gets ball (Taken with instagram) Photo: Herro Jay (Taken with instagram) I AM THE EMBODIMENT OF INSANITY I SURRENDER ALL OF MYSELF to your teachings. "LET ME JOIN YOU, league of the Twitter damned." YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND. SOCIAL MEDIA IS ALL I HAVE. I've got to get flying again. "WSJ: ""The problem (w digital hoarding) isn't that it slows down your computer—it slows down your brain."" " ru2213y Hello. Neglecting all my responsibilities because I've realized that responsibility is bullshit. PersonTheHumann ghettogeek ru2213y kotex Calm down everyone. GhettoGeek No. Terrorizing the internet and working my way through Star Trek: The Next Generation. Just finished Enterprise after only 6 weeks. GhettoGeek ru2213y personthehumann kotex Ok. GhettoGeek Good morning. "My favorite activity: decimating your stereotypes, generalizations, and schemas. Frightening the masses." My girlfriend is critiquing Star Trek uniforms with me. What a paradox. Photo: Sky (Taken with instagram) I apologize to my followers for deviating from my preset instagram regimen of cats and my shoes. Photo: Too much nature. (Taken with instagram) Photo: Nature (Taken with instagram) Photo: She’s pwetty. (Taken with instagram) I'll just fill your Twitter feed with instagram photos of my shoes and other people's cats. ayyyyyy. Drycast is LIVE in 30 minutes! livepodcast TokyoMotorShow auto tech android culture Farewell. I just consumed 6 espresso shots and I can feel myself leaving the studio. Drycast David Blue ClickHole: Incredible! Watch This Man Realize The One Person He Really Wanted To Come To The Party Isn’t Coming Our reign over reality is coming to an end. PersonTheHumann that's perfect. I'll probably just be getting to car. PersonTheHumann ok cool. "Drycast is in two hours, fum. Join us here: " It needs to be filled in the next 20 minutes. Drywall Media Grocery Retrieving position now open. Whoever tagged someone in the comments...I'm impressed. Halloween is about the scary...but not the ACTUALLY scary? I'll never outdo this. " they're all around me, for as far as the eye can see. Please help." at least indoctrination would necessitate some explicitly articulated ideology. the most entertaining thing is that they share a vague Sesame Street / Marvel hero system of ethics but never define it. rickyrozay: Salute Adele. I remixed her vibe. anotherone RenzelRemixes Hello You know what's a lot worse than scientific language in public schools? COMIC SANS. verge: What comes after the smartphone? Drycast Episode 47 is goin live in 12 hours! What an interesting shot. edward_ki32: Anche AUTOMOTIVENEWES cita la pagina!! Where normally intelligent ADULTS dress up like children to go BEG. The only day of the year where it's ok to trespass on my property and EXPECT ME TO GIVE YOU FREE FOOD. "lamp_head thank. More is coming, I'm sure." "lamp_head I am a bitter old man, and I do not enjoy events that inspire people to make jokes of themselves and trespass on my property." What an intolerable holiday. MUbeidillah: Family Day NISSAN EXCITEMENT JOURNEY Ready NissanID "I will not watch a horror movie on Halloween, but I may commit murder." evvandvvorak ?? : Wolf Creek (2005) The car equivalent of Jesus Christ. NYTMinusContext: Too much activity is bad NYTMinusContext: stop Tweeting NYTMinusContext: I don’t want God NYTMinusContext: finally my turn to suffer Last chance to get in on episode 47! djbitchtits: netflix and panic virgyvirgil that was just a previously-recorded segment. I haven't actually started recording the show yet. "If you wanna be on Drycast tonight, now's the time. " zbindendesign: "BREAKING: New superfast ""Apple Hell Hole"" I/O to replace USB 4.0." guccibraidz Lil' Poopy. "Drycast is going LIVE in 5 minutes with TokyoMotorShow discussion, Android news, AI ethics, and more! " It's been just over 4 years since the release of Hamura - the album that started a movement. """Livin life in the friendzone!"" [all moaning]" Daily affirmation. notch: This is technically not true! I've been laughing at this for 20 minutes. I'm going to punch my laugh in the face. MUMFORD MUMFORD & SONS DRONE PILOT HOLY FUCK FollowTheFamine Last week's episode has notes now! Definitely my favorite one in awhile. Drycast please do. BMW really knows a lot because he is one of the last surviving Sega children. Wunkolo: Me trying to follow bob ross we've gotta be one of the only shows that still regularly talks about Sega hardware. I just triggered the Hey Siri prompt from the past via drycast. content_liker content liked! ...from complacency altogether. Please hire me. I will create constant content for the rest of my days. I'm ready to retire. I think I am going to take my Jaguar in this morning to at least get an idea of what all needs to be done. we must use humor to elevate ourselves from the darkest places. "MrJamesMay: I've actually done a small bit of motoring journalism. ExhaustedOfHammersmith " " that may have been a bad joke, sorry." how can you be lonely when there are 46 available episodes of Drycast? maddieperhaps I'm glad. trubIu thanks. "maddieperhaps it is full of lots of noise, as always. How are you?" BaronVonClutch: BEST FRIENDS FOREVER. GianmariaBruni toni_vilander FerrariRaces AFCorse (Photo: FIAWEC) 6hShanghai … Supabaddiddy: Look at his face. He just wanted to be spider man. lamp_head: trasssh "Finally, a taste of real joy after all these years." THE 24-HOUR CLASSICAL STATION LAUNCHED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! maddieperhaps hello. ammnont_ebooks no. "ammnont_ebooks: AsphaltApostle send it to me, i'll still technically be in wrong places more often, then" "My moshi overture case seems to be capable of completely absorbing human blood, which is convenient." "I look like I'm about to die at any moment, there's blood on my jacket and my hands smell like muffins." a_nice_frog aIbertjazeera a_nice_frog I'm gay now. a_nice_frog does this mean I'm gay???? a_nice_frog no way!! I never sold mine back from school because I got too attached to them and everyone's chided me as a result. I bled on my iPhone case. guccibraidz Tanqueray. "Drycast episode 47 with weedhitler, aIbertjazeera, IrateGamerNEO, and virgyvirgil is now available! " I found a cassette rip of an old piano EP I made a long time ago. Art. reporter_e WOW. "blank_was_blank: His pseudo-capitalism was unquenched, like an idle timepiece" reporter_e: Grid opening. Toay's grid girl is NOA. It's still very cold. I wonder if drunk-grading papers is a regular thing for professors. Sentreh instead of constantly acting under the assumption that my business will be held accountable for all customer ignorance. Sentreh I think it's volition and equilibrium of accountability. I want you to assume I respect myself enough to accept my consequences. Sentreh this is actually quite a destructive mentality in the retail world - to both parties. orgamecha: truck or treat "guccitwist after wearing the outfit, though, I think I actually like it. It's very loud." "guccitwist as I told her, ""something in-between."" Every article is regularly worn, but not in such a bad color combo." "She was genuinely confused, and a bit disgusted, I think. Rightfully so." "For whatever reason, I am actually really good at identifying composers from given audio." """Is that a Halloween costume or...do you...dress that way?""" """You look like journalists"" was not an insult for these two. " Sentreh there's no food here. orgamecha the look of the sky or...? orgamecha really? officiaI_jaden BlSCUlTS Waaaw. David Blue " James Wilson, Gallup." : Polls are useful ways to make a punchline because you can easily add a reaction StrengthBuild: Nothing like seeing white boys in brand new Corollas blasting hip hop. openculture: 7 Tips From Ernest Hemingway on How to Write Fiction The balloonists out today. ???????? Alien. I'm too old for life. "Ay Look, It's Tha Joke. " I started crying when I first saw it in person. Skunk Hour first date (Vine by Shitney) Haloween has become too spooked that I even that this happen in plain daylightsc... (Vine by tonytomahawk69) Lol (Vine by cedrick66) This is what my feet sound like. "Post-Halloween, Columbia Missouri " Ye sleepy city. AsphaltApostle It's time for a jog. e David Blue kabeebus big celestial hotties. "kabeebus I was thinking Earth, but Uranus or Jupiter would be cooler." Altocelarophobic Techno "ciara_isobel I'd like to have many, though. Btw Ciara, thanks for being such a good mom. It's very precious & important." kabeebus this can't be...no this is really happening...the PUNS are happening. kabeebus: AsphaltApostle It must be out of this world Club in orbit. I have a Twitter profile. I'm on Twitter. trubIu especially a girl who is a truck. travisjdahnke too fast for love; too fast for anything. trubIu relationship goals. ciara_isobel yes. "Next Twitter feature: auto-distributed ""I Voted"" stickers for poll participants." StarJoyThePoet: Because of the way the earth is positioned I suppose I just need a drummer and a bass player. This is not a joke. I feel like I should do it soon - before hipsterism is over. I want to staa bossa nova band. orgamecha she's big. I'm married to the sun. "GasStationMemes: I, is the total black, being spoken from the earth's inside." """Are you a social Darwin?""" I walked 10 miles last night and I'm not sore. Family pic! :) """New York-winter pale.""" travisjdahnke I have none. travisjdahnke this is distressing. travisjdahnke no. ROWDY ALMONDS Ten Thousand Tylers I'm just hair to you. I like David Blue because he... David Blue's feet are...? Polls on Twitter... Oprah: He travisjdahnke what can this mean. buttzke I think you've found their singular use. Take in a back. Taken a back. orgamecha it's yelling. My feet won't shut up. "falsejacksonvp: if i met humans of new york i'd be like ""Fuck i said bout them Granola bar crumbs in my car"" and they'd change it to ""I…" "Well, I have a reason to visit North Korea now. " TowerRNLI: A few pics earlier captured by our volunteer Carl on his way to his shift. LondonFog sarahjwells: Flew into foggy London. Views are beautiful - this is the Shard and all the towers in the city "beltedradial if it were anything else, I'd agree, but I carried this everywhere as a child, so it was expected. " beltedradial not sure if that makes me an aviation nerd or something else... beltedradial I burst into tears in front of a rabble of children the first time I saw the Spirit and the Wright Flyer in the Smithsonian. I'm fairly sure Londoners drive internal combustion-powered vehicles for the most part... mashable: 16 striking photos of Britain enveloped in a thick blanket of fog "A bit late, isn't it? " I want to make a good first impression. "Don't let the name GreatPumpkin leave the solar system, you fools. ""The humans name comets after their crops...a cute!""" """...a series of games and tips intended to teach how to identify someone who may be falling prey to radical extremists.""" Do not listen to the Wow! signal late at night. Do people...read this? "speedmonkeycouk: Werthers Originals, tartan flask of tea, speed limiter set to 40mph, fluffy lined slippers all included as standard ht…" speedmonkeycouk: Remember the Jordan Civic? There's a 2015 version. It's got 60bhp and the engine explodes twice a day … kabeebus nickeljp4444 I voted & I expect a sticker. HOLY. nope - tons of manhours are spent taking care of me and I'm very loud. I was born an airplane. beltedradial this is most definitely NOT a photograph of world famous aviator Charles Lindbergh. guccibraidz I feel like blow may be a better option if you're looking to increase your collegiate ability. I came out of the womb in Levi 501s. shadiko I've never been naked. BIRD "When your life is so empty that you sit in different rooms depending on what color outfit you're wearing... ???????? " cool Star Wars™ fan art, James!" FAVORITING MENACE David Blue That thigh gap though... ???? ™ David Blue™ MotorTrend: The 2016 Kia Optima loses its top for the SEMASHOW SEMA "paulisci: Hey new Star Trek TV show. you should do a show about Federation politics, not too many people would watch, but I would." "I love how the face of the guy from the ""why the fuck you lyin"" vine is becoming an international symbol of ""it's time to tell the truth.""" cnni: Today marks a huge milestone for Space_Station: 15YearsOnStation Sentreh The really scary thing? I'm not joking. I would actually go to Pyongyang to test these if given the opportunity. "That being said, I wish there was a ""What Do I Want?"" button on the Google homepage." "The moment I arrive, all of London's displays simultaneously begin showing umbrella advertisements. " THERMAL AWARENESS TICKS KNOW TRIGONOMETRY meesherbeans Same situation here. Saw a dude drinking beer while riding a unicycle. Went around Columbia bangin' screw for an hour with my girlfriend. Also found a solo piano tape from circa 5th grade. Trying to cope with the RARITY and OBSCURITY. Listening to my 1/1 Roobie Phawls cassette BITCHES. Struggling with the philosophical implications of eating Kiwi in bulk. How much Kiwi can you buy in one purchase? Already have 2.7 DAYS of Screw. Yesssss PersonTheHumann Torrent. I'll link it to you when you get back to civilizationland. Photo: Track 2 of the first Screw tape. Working my way through the entire discography. (Taken with... It never ends. It permeates everything. “ru2213y: Ive noticed the ihadtopee twat style seep into DepravedInfant” Feel free to come yell insults at my piano. Photo: YOU DEPRAVED IMMORAL FAUX IVORY PIANOSLUT WHORE CUNTBAG FUCK (Taken with instagram) Photo: Pianoviolence (Taken with instagram) ETA: 25 Days. I hope I'm alive that long. CapnHellaSwagg Need a lift? "Downloading DJ Screw's entire discography. Turns out, my HD is filled with a bunch of shitty fraps footage and Drywall. Yayayayay" TWAP OR DIE samfrkl Fuck music I'm only able to claim I'm anti-materialistic because I have everything. Photo: GANGSTA BOO A(Taken with instagram) Photo: I AM A RAKIST (Taken with instagram) savagememes I know it's simple and cheap...but I am in love with this knife. I lost my last one a few weeks ago and have been grieving. lamp_head remind me the next time I tweet about cutting myself with it at work. My new Drifter is here! ?? Tfw u need your new knife to open the box it's in. I want to be a health goth. slightlyspoopy I think I was asking if the outfit was health goth. Thanks. I'll never have enough leather & silk. FUCK. Fetish zeal The South Carolina class was so cute!! IrateGamerNEO: i am the guy from ReBoot AssRavager: I am the guy from ReBoot I'm Ron Paul. StrengthBuild: I'm the guy from ReBoot I'm the guy from Reboot. My First Sony "miliondollameat: social media: do drugs me: okay" This is... What have I become? boatfactory can I have your when you're done with it. Rogue airship. Road airship. """The Drobox app for Apple Watch... So you can check if your file is there as many times as you want.""" scg003c: SCG003 SCG003C Nürburgring "RDV69: A dubious one from ""You can never have too much downforce."" " BIG BOYS MY BIG FUCK IS lamp_head ok. My username is Dieselgoth. "lamp_head it's stellar, actually, but only if you are REALLY naval nerdy." kowaiinchigo it keeps me awake at night. kowaiinchigo I would never poop on a car. Industrial techno & World of Warships. I would be a good bird. pee. I knew you were going to retweet that. " read out of the corner of my eye as ""i ejaculate common knowledge""" November Has Come -Gorillaz ft MF Doom. Ft me as a rapping toad. (Vine by Lil Gute) SPEEDY BOAT ClickHole: Retweet if you love the fucked-up hamburger! "0kbps: i just went on /r/Knots and im honestly dying at this holy shit oh yeah baby i can ID that knot;) " 0kbps everyone wants a hug. 0kbps I see this on the street every day. 0kbps: Robocatpat: TheMoreYouKnow This is why I do what I do. TheOnion: Customer Who Declined Initial Offer Of Assistance From Floor Salesman Comes Crawling Back … idiot_joke_teen cool spaceship. Brooke_Carroll: smh "I go to sleep. I wake up, and Twitter is ruined. What the fuck happened." David Blue boatfactory it would seem you're in the minority. "It's me, logeydogey. " college (Vine by camille toe) Every (week)day. You're all animals. virgyvirgil no idea. Leave this playing for the rest of your life. agentbizzle: In the last month Activision spent six billion dollars buying Candy Crush and six hundred dollars developing the new Tony … ElectionDay electionday2015 wifehaver ammnontet looks like a grand ole time! HighGearMedia: Spy shots of the new 2017 Mercedes-Benz? E-Class are live on MotorAuthority? for. … ROY. What an achingly beautiful racing car. F1: 3 Nov 1991: The shortest race in F1 history. Senna wins in Adelaide with results taken from lap 14 OnThisDay … "Arminposts: This morning as a PR manager, I'm holding a dialogue with a concerned parent regarding Satanism in Goat Simulator …" "AW! Somebody couldn't handle their own vanity, so they started a ""movement."" " Camp Kirby travisjdahnke Izzy_Empeyy cool quirk. travisjdahnke what is that thing. CNNMoney: Honda is dumping longtime supplier Takata over its deadly airbags travisjdahnke you've ruined everything. I don't want to be on this planet anymore. Goodbye. You don't have to hug me without pants. It's good to hug. "travisjdahnke we have a pretty blue ball, don't we?" Does anyone have any pants? I need some pants. LordHumphreys are you on the Titanic? LordHumphreys: Elevator status via C travisjdahnke hell on earth. NKcars: A famous ¥1-yen taxi from 1933. Classic Ford taxi at Edo Tokyo Museum. Highly recommended! cars travel Japan … akiba_k3i: hmm... coyotes_ebooks 0kbps dear God! PersonTheHumann I can just wait for you to do car like last time. "PersonTheHumann like noon, I guess? Assuming you want to hang out in the city beforehand." I still don't know what Lele Pons looks like because she's always moving too fast. PersonTheHumann not yet but I'm working the folks. KRIT is more important than employment. ?? FUCK. BUGBIRDS????!!!! BIG BOY. """So if you're not looking for infrastructure...because you're a basic...""" NO. """Brand loyalty is a disease."" Yeeeeeesss. " HourlyPoll: The ultimate car buying decision poll: """Are you just watching your own dog videos on the podcast?"" ""Yes.""" IMPORTANT poll robotpup yes. If only the Apple Watch had a Geiger counter. Idk why I retweeted that I don't even play the game. I still need pants. travisjdahnke what the fuck. What the fuck. lamp_head I'm David Blue. "travisjdahnke ""my name is David...and I have an empire. I need you to visit my website and donate. Yes...right now.""" travisjdahnke cool. When do I get to self-promote? What happens if you go to an AA meeting completely trashed. travisjdahnke I understood this joke. I'm getting fat. "akb_udx_pstaff: ???UDX???[??SNAP]NO:2244 ?????[???] ITASHA ??????????????????? TOYOTA MR-S????? ???mixi? http…" Good butt. BEAUTIFUL BUTTS. "influxmag: Because sometimes you just stumble across an image you want to share. Porsche Martini (via Ruote Rugginose) …" Lifestyles of the Laptop Café "In my utopia, the editors-in-chief of GQ, HuffPost, etc. have weekly gunfights to determine who is best." SUPERB butt. HistoRacingHD: Perfection just took shape. Thai isn't a real language. "Tinder bio example: ""Yes I spend my days trying to appear as interesting as possible but actual substance is waning.""" beebee880: Can you all send me bus pics I want 1000 of them Celebrity News For: A Teen Who Just Got Really Into Pink Floyd twitter ClickHole: Abuse Of Power: President Obama Could Probably Steal From Home Depot And Not Get In Trouble … Says the man in the white shoes. Impressive appropriation. DavidBlueDraws PB&J tama323: "GasStationMemes: If you died today, would anyone miss you?" WACKY TOBACCO This is my best Tweet. Hear that tapping sound? Yeah...he's a good choice. Girls and mechanical keyboards come and go... Mechanical keyboards: how u know he's hot as fuck. I'm too big. "The traveling Rolls-Royce exhibition apparently had one room ""dedicated to the smell and feel of natural wood."" These are my people." The whole point of producing web content is for people to look at ads...but what if I just want to look at ads all day? The Seoul & Tokyo snap stories are amazing what to fuck. "rom_txt: uxfvgVwufwVTUEUETUUTEECEDD3DCCEDUDSUCDCD !43""DEFTSBUTDTDD$3TUTUEEUTETUTTEEFh - hotd" ammnontet thanks. ammnontet: ammnontet don't subtweet me. "ammnontet: white neckbearded man living off of dad's paychecks slams hands on keyboard. ""gender is god's choice."" he grins, rotting tee…" ammnontet: if you're from illinois i'll kick your ass Frank :( frankiemuniz: I lost my tortoise. Devastated. " they were very wealthy so whatever you did, I appreciate it." " it's a bit more complicated than that, I think, but I'm not the right individual to explain further." GlennCDoyle: Mazda shows off new MX5 concepts at 2015 SEMA show - thoughts? SEMA2015 TheDanProsser: Don't think I've ever seen evomagazine looking better than this. An unforgettable week! In shops now ecoty … JRRBatchelor: At the launch of the new Jaguar XJ6 today. Easily in contention for autoexpress car of year 2016 LouisKarsenbarg: I knew I could count on ChrisDelia to post a brilliant response to EssenaOneill's whiney social media bullshit. ???? h… a_nice_frog you want to watch this movie. """Get ready with David Blue!"" video tagged as makeup tutorial but it's actually me warming up the boiler to a Stanley Steamer for 4 hours." PersonTheHumann I was hoping it was literal. Chilling. What can this mean... I want to staa bossa nova band called Beaucoup. guccibraidz you can have my hand in marriage. Doesn't get any better than that. ammnontet: Mood II "akiba_k3i ah. I was asking because I ended up comparing the Juke to the Miata, dynamically. (Performance is also very similar.)" mt_loverman: Happy Hump Day Bentley Continental GTCSpeed AppleGreen LittleTujunga Little Tajunga ammnontet he's gone too far this time! ammnontet: THIS JUST IN: Obama replacing United States military with bottles of ketchup akiba_k3i are you referring to the Juke? Imagine if people made a very loud noise when they were angry. Here it is. I starred in a pornography once. edward_ki32: Hi this is my love 164 :3 stefthepef: I may need to clean these shoes off. travisjdahnke this is what Drywall Media is all about! Why is this so funny. This is my Final Message. Remember: you can never have too many wives or umbrellas. "Likes make a lot more sense, but that's why favorites were so great. ""Everything is my favorite!""" HitlerDokus: Hitlers Erklärung zum dritten Weltkrieg nachdem Twitter Favoriten in Likes geändehat. kabeebus oh dear. cuties. Motorola Morning """If you're looking for the representative of the straight white community...""" I'm living a Breitling Emergency. " yes, James. I am a materialist." I've always been big. travisjdahnke they're basically the same food. I'm an artist. travisjdahnke DavidBlueDraws peach cobbler. (Fuck.) DavidBlueDraws pineapple. I am 86 years old. Give me a food to draw for DavidBlueDraws 0kbps this is so web 7.0 holy fuck. DavidBlueDraws himself. "TylerElkstar always good to hear from you, Elk." TylerElkstar: AsphaltApostle Butt Daddy "pissboot ""white...BIG.""" CoxworthIII Oh dear. motoringcomau: Toyota Tundra x Limosine = Tundrasine Toyota toyota It's cool to look deceased. CHUCK. A $50 Olive Garden gift card is not a gift... It is a sentence. akiba_k3i I wouldn't either. Sentreh David Cameron is on my side... Everyone in the UK is visiting and donating. I thought some may appreciate me incorporating some sexual humor. syrupf good. My genitals can end life as we know it. I wonder if some sexually fetishize ICBMs for their power and phallic shape. DontFeelSadBot DontFeelSadBot: AsphaltApostle Cheer up! Adversity causes some to break; others to break records. "When I'm feeling down, I read the wiki blurb for Nuclear Sea Mines. It never ceases to make me smile." MilSurplus I would like to purchase one of these for home defense. Can u guys help me out? Thanks. """A man I do not trust could not get money from me on all the bonds in Christendom."" " kowaiinchigo The Burden of Man """Rest in peace, Kurt,"" said the young man - his finger pointed accusingly at the ceiling of the gas station." kowaiinchigo and legitimately talented. PersonTheHumann oh dear. PersonTheHumann you can just have the David Klazz account if you want to do that. PersonTheHumann yeah I...don't really get it anymore. PersonTheHumann god damnit. kowaiinchigo yes. You should too. David Blue PersonTheHumann no. I have never seen a pea. " some can be found in here, though in a less distressing context. " the hit single that started a revolution. "No tagbacks, Medusa." no. I AM TOSK Interspecies politics is complicated. Tommyboy2021: I wish I could join the quest for a prom dress like all my friends are :( leftout vaginaenvy Nas: hanging wit my bro TRAEABN in the Yitty!!!! Make sure y'all follow his twitter Rapmonster Racism is ignorance. Nothing more. "Jazegus. “AGuyWithNoLife: Nobody at this church looked at this and thought ""hmm...that doesn't look right""? ”" "Rapmonster: Give a man a fish, and you'll feed him for a day. Give him a religion, and he'll starve to death while praying for a fish." "Rapmonster: Truth, in matters of religion, is simply the opinion that has survived" Rapmonster: The most heinous and the most cruel crimes have been committed under the cover of religion or equally noble motives "Rapmonster: When I do good, I feel good. When I do bad, I feel bad. That's my religion." "Rapmonster But without religion, is there really evil? Or is evil just ignorance? Or perhaps ""illness""? Different from the norm." PersonTheHumann I think she would rather I did drugs. Rapmonster I like you. "Rapmonster: True religion is real living; living with all one's soul, with all one's goodness and righteousness." """Mom, I don't do drugs on the weekends like other kids. I hang out in sewers and record obscure tapes of made up genres.""" "That's right suburbia, trust your eyes. I am a proud loser." PersonTheHumann Whoever's mowing your lawn is doing a very dry job. Photo: Taken with instagram "I ONLY HAVE 11,461 EMAILS THAT'S NOT ENOUGH" Photo: Screw. This is my life. (Taken with instagram) JoshSundquist: SOLEMATES: Friends with half-price shoe benefits. JMan_Rife That's a good thing. "MazdaRaceway: Porsche vs. YAMAHA in the snow, who's it gonna be?? " I am not a nice person. The Verge's offices are so cute holy FUCK. orgamecha it's actually just a countdown to your death. "K, it's time for the Drycast SEMA correspondent to take over so that I can rest my weary bones!" "You're an adult now, son, and it's time for you to wear a watch. A big heavy chronograph. Bear it like you bear my name." and Steve Jobs. : Mark Zuckerberg like a cartoon character he only got 1 outfit ryandeel couldn't it also just be one of the quirks of his scary-ass species? akiba_k3i: Lack of Post-Colonial Awareness Resorts "My idea of a pleasure cruise... It's on a battleship, and we conquer a small island country." Afal: Ah the 5th of November. The day where we burn the effigy of Adult 4chan Man akiba_k3i health goth? Boats Without Limits Up quirk level by drinking cheap scotch and reading poetry anthologies. noooooooo. My legacy: BOATS. Apparently some of the shopping areas in Seoul stay open until 5AM? This is very good. zach504 Did I use the wrong adverb? """Why'd you guys raise your gas prices twenty cents?"" ""To protect my holdings in the UAE."" ""Ah.""" "I find it incredibly dull, personally, but I'd like to know how you feel." "He was already having a hard time and typed ""oh come on :("" in the chat and I was devastated." I ended up accidentally pushing a friendly Chester backwards in Warships last night. But who wants that? It could almost be civilized. wHEN u I love Detroit techno so much. Lelelearn to cope. Joanna Newsom and I create in the same genre. I suppose he'd probably thank me. I am NOT going to kill the dog. I am not going to kill the dog. I am not going to kill the dog. animeidols: pitbull song idea: pitbull starts counting uno dos tres cuatro but doesnt stop. he just keeps counting during the whole song syrupf is it a constant tone? syrupf what a strange fish...what a strange house. "zbindendesign: Southwestern Sunset by Norma Camilliere " (Does it get any cuter?) "Just give me the sunshine and your smile I'll be ok " "AWAKEN, YE SPIRIT OF DARKNESS. " Not complaining though. Please give me more. I'm exhausted from SEMA and I'm not even there. akiba_k3i no idea. orgamecha: dont talk to me until ive had my morning yodel travisjdahnke how dare you soil his name! NASAVoyager can you tell Jupiter to please pipe down while you're up there? Thanks. ihaveswineflu: I shall not return kabeebus I'm pretty sure I was in one of the new German cruisers. Um... Poor Tony is still suffering every day. "im going CRAZY WITH THE HOTKEYS THIS IS BIG, BOYS" LOOK AT THE EOLCOATION The noise? All me. The guilt is eating me up inside. I am not going to send Popular Mechanics any nude photographs. hell yes i want to add popular mechanics on snapchat ammnontet good joke. ammnontet: YouWereSoHotUntil you fell under the ice and never found your way back up YouWereSoHotUntil you denounced Bentley. YouWereSoHotUntil you became a foodist. Argentina is so beautiful. RallyGroupB: Walter Röhrl-Christian Geistdörfer Rallye Vinho do Porto 1985 RallyGroupB: Miki Biasion-Tiziano Siviero Rallye San Marino 1983 RallyGroupB: Ari Vatanen-Terry Harryman Rallye Montecarlo 1985 GROUP B PICS HAD ME FUCKED UP RallyGroupB: Attilio Bettega-Maurizio Perissinot Rallye Monte Carlo 1984 RallyGroupB: Michèle Mouton-Fabrizia Pons Rallye Sanremo 1981 I'm not sure if I want to even attempt mentioning this on the podcast tomorrow. """Mitigate the gusto.""" "kowaiinchigo this is extraordinarily insightful. Please have it framed and shipped, thanks." "LILBTHEBASEDGOD: Please stop asking me how Lil B followed over 1.2 million people over Twitter, he did it by hand, just congratulate hi…" MUMFORD MrJamesMay I have none to give. guccibraidz Uber should pay him for this. CoxworthIII it just occurred to me that you should occasionally Tweet your current word count with appropriate hashtags. "it's a counterfeit rolex, too" Inheritance. """We'd just salute the person we wanted to die most."" " Hope you haven't forgotten. PersonTheHumann yup. Have all Saturday off. "May the big boys throw the egg swiftly and always remember that our gargantuan, howling friend is watching too! ?? " """I'm writing to raise money for cancer research."" *crowd bursts into howling laughter*" "I'm a community man, now!" "CoxworthIII: AsphaltApostle ""Imagibe the sound of the first nuclear detonation ever made."" Me ""That's the sound our elbow bump makes?""…" David Blue 0kbps I'm serious about GeoCities. Rare Unicode collector. fatbellybella: Damn I got 6% left on my phone ... Hhhhh. youngthug: H My Mind Went Blank [Orchestral Variation] (I don't have to carry the burden of time anymore) "Actually, more." "Well, a bit less." Drycast episode 48 is going live in 12 hours. :) what do you want to argue about? "kowaiinchigo conveniently, this was published today. (Last link, I promise.) " Getting in the habit doesn't hu- they'll be able to perceive manners in the near future. I'm always polite to AI. My ISP has a very intelligent & helpful automated troubleshooting tool now. ciara_isobel REALOBT I think there's been a misunderstanding here; the young man was referring to a three-way call. LIVE on Periscope: The Chamillitary Variations no. cool. : Legless and sandwiches don't make sense without them. it would be a challenging one. kowaiinchigo I got the opportunity to spend a few days with a concours-mint 70s Cadillac and it was life-changing. "kowaiinchigo looks fun, right? " kowaiinchigo they make me happy. "kowaiinchigo well, if you're interested, this is my utopia, and it's all bred in your city. " kowaiinchigo holy FUCK. I am culturally from Huston. Idk if the SUC means anything to you but that's basically all I listen to. kowaiinchigo I can always be found attempting to scramble up one of the sides of the Midwestern fish bowl. BREAKDANCE BEACH kowaiinchigo you have exquisite taste. this argument we've had wasn't very contentious. " after all these years, they're all that's left of me. I don't blame you." ": AsphaltApostle no not really, we actually call you the car and hair guy" Fishy goings. There's a fishing happening here. No no no... That's not right. There's a fish here. Please send help! I've been shot! " good God. I'm not actually referred to as ""the car guy,"" am I?" ah yes. I figured that's why you were here. Uh oh! You caught me! I can't do this anymore. "BMWi: To burn always with this hard gemlike flame, to maintain this ecstasy, is success in life. …" "Two strangers told me ""you should be in broadcasting"" within a 6 hour period yesterday and I was just like ""k u got a business card or...?""" "piss_wizard: you: cries at a fucking advedesigned to make oyu buy shit me: on SSRIs which mute any kind of emotional response to any…" Fucking Panera Bread A Tribe Called SUC k we can be married now. UTOPIA " ok: 1. Alcohol is a great hangover cure. 2. Contemporary culture fetishizes food too much." Xires2 there's a few. Why isn't this on the popular page. reckless I'm assuming the Orpheus headphones will be vigorously hypechecked. This is my first time watching ESPN in 10 years. They have better suits than I remember. But I AM drinking in plain view of the state Capitol at 1:30 in the afternoon. adrianfer15 I...thank you. Tanqueray and OceanSpray is happening. I am not running for office. adrianfer15 I don't understand anything about this photograph. AmznMovieRevws: The Wolf of Wall Street. "ImJessiLang: (I'm not shooting today & can finally show you the cars!) Nissan S14 with 1000+ hp SEMA NissanSEMAweek …" Why have I not been made aware of this adorable little place where people wear interesting… "Sentreh by ""people,"" you mean Americans." I don't want to leave. My backup can host Drycast tonight. I've just figured out the key to this beauty: tobacco can be bought at 18 here. "The only local tweets are either relationship advice or public employees. Hello, people of micro-Williamsburg. " PersonTheHumann it's where we drove the Evo + 300 at night. (Exact GPS coordinates attached.) PersonTheHumann it's not just the scenery; the stores are amazing too. It makes Columbia look daft. "Everyone's polite, well-dressed, and wearing WATCHES. AH." How did I not know about this. ivy_hollivana it's me. The Specific Ocean ShuWillis4: It's nice to meet you too ?? OnePerfectShot: New International Trailer for STAR WARS: THE FORCE AWAKENS Tons of New Footage! … "zbindendesign: Awakening of Tuscany by Daniel Metz " Hello. FUTURE FUNK FRIDAYS RippleFrog thanks. "RippleFrog: N 38°44'55"", W115°28'27""" randlechris: the subway doors parted in front of my mom to reveal a cascading river of vomit Somebody come on the cast that can say the things I can't about Ben Carson's new rap ads. travisjdahnke sounds like a good time to join us on Drycast! syrupf: im getting beat up by all 3 pepboys at once Drycast is going LIVE in 5 minutes! podcast livepodcast tech music film culture SEMA2015 "If you'd like to participate in Drycast tonight, this is the only link you'll need. " David Blue I hear this instead of Adele. syrupf: Rick Ross - I Don't Go To Sleep I rambled about my 1990 Toyota Hilux (pickup) and you can watch it now. " I just did, live." LIVE on Periscope: Drycast CANCELED: NO MORE LIES SEMASHOW: LIVE on Periscope: Drifting at SEMA Ignited. sema2015 Dead Hands. (That's not a piano!) "LIVE on Periscope: Waze, College Town Money, Accident on Stadium " LIVE on Periscope: Ye Olde Hilux & fall Descent. There is a man talking about lobbying. here's the proof. kabeebus that's the nicest thing anyone's said about me in years. kabeebus it's this. " yes, but you have, and there's that twin cloud sharing thing." FUNERAL CLOWN sorry. syrupf: syrupf: man i dont even fucking know anyomre BasedDFZ: My second Yelp review is out "StrengthBuild: American food: the most calories with the least nutrients Classic American cars: the least power with the largest engine" the rug? It's me. LIVE on Periscope: Sleepy Piano Stream When someone parks in front of you but you own a G ?????? (Vine by Earlsimxx) "Candid video always makes youths identify their current location, especially when in groups. " PersonTheHumann "PersonTheHumann it was in the Mizzou campus snapchat story - blading to Future. With the caption ""the trend is spreading.""" BMW and I inadvertently started a trend of rollerblading on campus and neither of us attend the school. Joanna Newsom vs. Carl Edwards CoxworthIII: AsphaltApostle getting into pjs be there soon. PersonTheHumann it's all good either way. "Drycast is taking Collin Phillips joke track break, but we'll be back shortly with CoxworthIII! " PersonTheHumann sweet! That'll work out perfectly. youngthug: LIVE on Periscope: Studio artkidsucks: I FEEL SO ME Cadillacs at The Church Of Christ ammnontet never loud enough. ammnontet: oh yeah i can make polls now. what kind of album should i do LILBTHEBASEDGOD: hey buttcheeks Incredible. !!!!!! ammnontet: Deadmau5 is the Maddox of the music world: He started out strong but now he just kinda looks like Tom Green and only old peo… ihaveswineflu: ihaveswineflu """Excuse me miss, do you have a bathroom? It's time for my penance.""" kabeebus should be in the lower left corner. Hello. Gothbotting. DATA TRUCKER kabeebus Dieselgoth. Lil' Debbie is the female Pimp C. Versace fork in the road. Do not leave the M3. Everything you need to live can be found in the M3. Remember the Ford Excursion. *laughing* ihaveswineflu: 2day : When ur sis realizes she can do the snapchat filters on the poor child ru2213y Glad to be of service. "Saw my capitalist friend ru2213y in person, not in Twitter." Walking around suburbia bangin' Screw. ihadtopee: I uploaded a YouTube video Pianoviolence Floppy drives and cassette tapes make me hungry. PersonTheHumann FUCK IM DESTROYING THIS COMPUTER "7 hours to transfer 26 GB. Thank you, USB 1.0." Photo: A better time. (Taken with instagram) Photo: Floppyz. SWAF (Taken with instagram) "PersonTheHumann Though that FUCKING PIANOWHORE is now in the landfill where it belongs, I kept the piece you wanted to skate on." EdLoh: DepravedInfant Can't have it. Photo: More landfill (Taken with instagram) Photo: Landfill - the new home of that FUCKING CUNT OF A PIANO (Taken with instagram) Photo: Help with what? (Taken with instagram) Photo: My piano. Finally where it DESERVES TO BE. (Taken with instagram) Photo: COVERED IN STICKS LIKE YOU DESERVE PIANOSLUT PIECE OF SHIT CUNT WHOREBAG SLUT FUCKER (Taken with... linnstatetech: LSTC Activity Center filling up with students! Missouri SkillsUSA officially starts in a few minutes! ... EdLoh I want your job. EdLoh: Showing my cousin the beauty and ugliness of California. STOP LOOKING AT TWITTER. SAVE YOURSELF. DO YOU HEAR ME THIS INFORMATION IS USELESS Why is Lil B following me? Am I that bad of a person? 0kbps: my mom thinks my fursona is cool as hell i8 had me like... ???????????????? AAAAAAAAAAAAA David Blue BOOTSY? I do not have to give in to the urges. I am in control. I am in control. I am the master of myself. I am in control. """My mood is pretty much based on what food I eat in a given day."" You do not want to be telling me this." syrupf: chube akiba_k3i: everyones always online "Venti Caramel Frappuccino & a chance to do it all again, please." Saddening. THE WRATH OF FUNK LILBTHEBASEDGOD: pee on her butt john...bro what's ur fucking problem. quite being a pussy and pee on her butt. u can't be a frat broth… MathisJohnny I will give you anything you want. MathisJohnny DO YOU STILL HAVE THIS TIE??? FUCK. FUCK. I want a minimalist record store dedicated to improv and full of sleepy pianists like me. "Don't worry, Wayne. " Keith Jarrett is THE authority on sleep. I am merely a peon. wolfygun: look up in awe "Are you, really? " "ivy_hollivana ""welcome to episode one of 'David Blue.' I'm your host, David Blue.""" I need ideas for a witty name. Here are some starters: "To encourage myself to power cycle, I am going to have a regular Periscope show to drain my phone's battery from single digits to dead." "Damn, we're us." I am a movement. : Good shit!!! Yeah fucker lie down comfortably!!! Hell yeah fuck yeah!!!! "bigkrit can do it, yeah. The Ready Room " IT'S MY DAD!!! "Attention aliens over LA, Come to St. Louis. It's Big KRIT you want to see. Thanks." Hyrokii_ebooks: trap out the bed bitch syrupf: eat at lowe's How did this happen. VWR36R32: ???? ????? zbindendesign: Has Formula One reached a point where the technology has over taken the skill of the drivers? CarReviews2k: LAMBORGHINI PREGUNTA 1998 zbindendesign: Mr Monaco "Lowpolybot: badpng Your picture is ready: minimal gradient noedges shuffle colorize " ciara_isobel even if it's profitable? nbcsnl: Because of course. SNL "nbcsnl: Larry David couldn't miss this opportunity. SNL " The hunger strikes are just a few miles away. Shall I cover them today? "kcounews: Notes placed on the Thomas Jefferson statue describe Jefferson as a ""rapist,"" ""racist,"" ""murderer,"" and more. …" New Ultimate Tweet It's going to take me an entire lifetime to digest this album. WHAT THE FUCK. AHHHHHHHHHHH cap098u213098712039856723041n958734h05235409782534079h85234097823459078345097825340978134097816340958723n5-098 god...DAMN HOLY ASS FUCKING SLAY THAT SHIT ammnont_ebooks: extremely pleased to announce the NEW *** TWITTER JOKE Thank you based Jarrett. Oh my God I had no idea it'd be this good. "travisjdahnke do you hate me, Travis?" Matt Post is knocking down my walls and breaking my chains. (Vine by Matt Post) I'm all wound up now (Vine by Lil Gute) Contribute. If you or someone you know has a grand piano you'd be willing to let me play for a fee...hmu Mind Went Blank [in the style of Debussy] OurEdisons I'll bet. Columbia has a lot of DIY places though so I'm guessing I could get some alone time. "OurEdisons I'm kinda done with recording uprights for the moment, and there aren't any public grands around." "OurEdisons for me, it's the opposite, actually. I need to be alone and in silence so I can get myself in a trance." Guess I'd better get started. I'd also need to brush up on all the melodies and assimilate them enough to play around...which'll probably take a year. Minimum would be like $200 though so... Idk. I've been thinking about recording a whole SUC solo piano variations album in a studio sometime soon. wordnuvola wordcloud kowaiinchigo a public service proposal with legitimate benefit. ALLCAPSOFFICE: check yes juliet // we the kings peterseibel: I work at twitter but even I can’t believe how we replaced a completely value-neutral term like “favorite” with something… Please help me marry Gute from Vine. This is a scheduled Tweet. ciara_isobel I was asking if you're disgusted by seeking exposure solely for personal expansion. NBCNews: Missouri football players boycott in protest of university president RapGameShinji: I'm gonna have matte purple nightmares RapGameShinji thanks ?? chronometerpics: Jaeger-LeCoultre GgagaaggagsgdggagG 0kbps congrats on your successful infiltration. Is this it? Final answer? Really? "pissboot ""it was time for you to be told, and I was chosen as the person to explain it to you.""" pissboot I used to try and convince my friends of this exact thing to entertain myself when I was like 8-10. LIVE on Periscope: Just practicing - expect nothing Equipment operator (Vine by Chance Hill) syrupf: ConsciousnessProbs beebee880: Is there ghost app to communicate with ghosts Imagine a sentient being with zero biological history; zero default instinct. What would it want most? "More than anything, I want to ask ""what do you want?"" of an AI system with the capability of answering." akiba_k3i I think I'm looking for battery puns. I'll bet you're capable. The least entertaining wizard in history. "ammnontet: 1. do i know any girls 2. do they wanna do voice acting for something" Why don't more emo kids listen to The Gerogerigegege? pogomix: Huge shoutout to the very talented McMaNGOS1 for his amazing remix of Upular! TMFHousel: Musk on regulations: Good. wordnuvola wordcloud Xires2 Tru as fuck. HUG AI ammnontet smell Christ. Vine is pretty silly now that Periscope exists. I'm terribly confused. FUCK. ???????????????????????????????? I am a human being. Where is my John Deere Model A owner's manual I gotta take some steamy pics. travisjdahnke what did I do. Is everyone ok. ISP isn't really functioning. LTE isn't functioning. 4G is all I have left. What is happening. I'm very cool and not a nerd. I'm devastated. Sentreh my brain is leaking out of my face. Sentreh I have never cried. " the ""I write NASA software"" look." how'd you do that. "I don't actually do the lip thing in day to day life, I assure you. " Real Content Hours listening to my first album (Vine by cockspit) Eastern European emoji use. I have been unsuccessful in my quest to marry Gute. Help me. Please help. "!:?&28(/.:)/7;$9/?("";&92|€|£*]=?'nejalxmvpldd" ?? musicandmotors: A Rolls-Royce Silver Shadow spotted in Milwaukee Photo by Ben Davis AWHDGJDNAJV Good. Xires2 HIS FACE. Sorry about the yelling. SmokeKush4Lyfee: I make your death look like a accident :) promise Here's my star sign! Reply with yours! Are we compatible? ?? I want to get Big KRIT in front of a ton of ultra-sensitive mics to just talk for a while. "vergecars: Uber says New Yorkers took 50,000 pooled rides in one week in October " AutoCherish: Buy and Cherish this 1956 Mercedes-Benz 300 Sc Roadster via autocherish : Has NPRs All Things Considered considered THIS?? *middle finger goes up* orgamecha: marrow and lungi "RDV69: ""Don't settle for style. Succeed in substance.""-Wynton Marsalis " Fuckin with shorty (Vine by SUKKAR) THE LAST FRAME. Here. Wow. pissboot I'm going to send some umbrella pics to you over our neural cloud hold up. WAS THAT NOT THE PERFECT ENDING? LIVE on Periscope: DrainingWithDave Episode 1 - Evangelizing Battery Health When u the one elected to get the crew to listen up. Productive meeting. Life is a journey. "?? mccauleyphoto: Night at the Petersen Museum, with help from the-ppoa.  Astonishing. " "kowaiinchigo Internet Service Provider. Correct grammar would've been ""my ISP""* but ya know." travisjdahnke the joy on my face must make me more attractive. What a shame. I guess DrainingWithDave is happening sometime tonight. datamine geocities Rental mom. ShuWillis4: Hi Katy Perry & Hi Avril Lavigne. How are you girls doing & how was your day ?? autonewslv: L?dzek?i labdar?bai-pašu pirmo ASV ievesto Rolls-Royce Dawn p?rdos izsol?: "I couldn't find any Common, thank God." God damnit. I suppose I'll have to play this if I ever get a press Yukon. beebee880 yes! Veggiefact: F.U.C.K I wonder what basics think when they end up here after searching for the original. kowaiinchigo same. My best friend and I have been playing this and existing in the wee hours for years. kowaiinchigo "I need to do this, but for advice on literally anything except food. " Whale Of A Man "All fashion is, actually." Men's fashion is amazing right now. OfTheNegative: I love my new bath bomb ?????? Incredible. Canadian Snapchat David Blue : Embedding myself in stone and wood and absorbing the emotional energies of this household mommilitia kowaiinchigo fight. "Of course, the choice involving food is the most popular." lamp_head I am a piece of equipment. Should I change my legal name to... don't be genital Sadieisonfire I can help you. "verge: This is Tag Heuer's $1,500, titanium-clad Android Wear smartwatch " "I neet a ""SkyNet is a fictional entity"" bot." Sadieisonfire SkyNet is a fictional entity. "richardaucock: Big astonmartin V12 engine? Bet that's a bit juicy, people say. Well, now I can show them this. mpg …" yes. travisjdahnke interesting. I'm going to change my legal name to Panic Room. I thought you were DadChat but apparently not? PersonTheHumann PersonTheHumann yeah I can do a thing Saturday if you want. Rare photos from Dryfest 2013. PersonTheHumann yeah I'll be working. lamp_head yeah. PersonTheHumann crazy! I'm fuckin ready guys. "travisjdahnke thnx. I got the wrong track first, sorry." travisjdahnke "kowaiinchigo very good. Basically, I'm asking if it's the fast one. (Focus ST)" kowaiinchigo what year/trim is it? I'm a big boy and I need a big truck. Oracle is a wonderful name for a software company. Same. HOUALSDUFW938R710923847012938VN7 10394T8NHT432V097Y230Y89231F09Y781F23908HJ312F0983F12890790134780912F334231F0J98 URANIUM CLUB Very tired. "PeterMDeLorenzo: ""Pete, do you ever get tired, of the driving?"" ""No."" ""Lately, I sometimes get very tired, you know? Very tired."" English is weird. have had but have had time to come to terms with it. you look like you know when you're gonna die. "PrestigeDiesels: How the BMW M1 Supercar Almost Got a Second Lease on Life—And Why It Didn’t …" "LordHumphreys: Good morning from the DubaiMotorShow, where there's lot of this kind of thing " Duesenberg Speedcore AsphaltApostle you fucking idiot filth. We're getting back to semi-funny tweet territory now I'm announcing my return. Need more phones tbh virgyvirgil FUCK. virgyvirgil how can you know that. Gonna try and film another BAP video today. I apologize I've been neglecting you lol. Yikes! Antoine Dodson has a ustream.....and is live right now...... New temporary logo for paleoathletics Rediscovered Outasight 's further. Still one of my favorite albums. New YT Channel layout! and I are working on a website/complete business solution for paleoathletics New promo video for swava : Pressure sensor on the front door to determine how air flows throughout the house. I have to confess...the first (cont) KOMUnews: Nearly 150 people gather for Attorney General's symposium on improving water quality in the lake of the ozarks /via Natha ... I just got a second copy of the EXACT SAME rejection letter from the FAA.....this further confirms my theory that they be hatin'. mzeroa: The Your Flight Training Questions Webinar Recording is Live if you missed it Back to the Mosque for a second.. The great thing about this country is that everyone is free to do what they (cont) "emeek77 LOL, I GOT to get me one of those!" "emeek77: iphone 4 walkie talkie case, LOL. " Looks friggin' sweet too. Props to ddrdark. .....Yep that's right. ITS HTML5 BIATCH!!! "Anyone with an iPhone, you may want to visit Click the flip button on the upper right........." "I was planning on flying a sim flight for southwestvirtual, but I'm stuck upstairs watching foxnews lol." And blaming/stereotyping Muslims here in the U.S. for the actions of extremists is no different than blaming a Baptist for the Crusades. "Growing up in a Christian, mostly conservative family in the Midwestern U.S., one thing I hear often is (cont) " "That's mosque* (yes, I had to look it up). I have plenty of Muslim friends that understand and wouldn't do something like this." "This masque ""controversy"" is getting silly. Don't be angry because they're Muslims, be angry because they are TRYING to make you angry." Not sure if the gas can I got for Christmas has been used for gas or not. It smells funny. I guess I'll just drink out of it anyway. Rapmonster No. I'll only feel accomplished when I've scared away all my followers. Why does anyone follow me? DOUCHEBAG SLUSH "PersonTheHumann Up for a trip to Houston? We need to get to Screwed Up Records & Tapes with like $10,000 in cash and buy up all the tapes." My dream of owning an original copy of all the Screw tapes is going to be harder than I thought. Supposedly Z-Ro's first known recording. The Crooked Mind demo tape: I don't know if this is legitmate but damn... "TheAutoBully: :( :( “Jalopnik: The Last Saabs Ever Built, Left To Rot At A New Jersey Po”" Brian Johnson is disgusting. "It's not a good idea to drink unknown substances from strange people when pregnant. Nor is it good to encourage the act, Geico." Wiz Khalifa on a Bing commercial. What a load of shit. CHRISTIAN SLATER LIKES STAR TREK HOLY SHIT. That's not relevant to anything at all. I'm allowed to hate myself but I will fucking bother you until you have self-esteem. PersonTheHumann Pffffffffffffffttttttt PersonTheHumann Please make that happen. abusoru_ Please don't be sad. You're beautiful just the way you are. You deserve to be happy. Rapmonster: i like cookies Rapmonster No. Except it's more like screaming constantly. And I don't want to know the secrets. "Twitter, I love it when you whisper dirty messages in my ear." Good show. “ru2213y: WHAT IS THIS AND WHY AM I WATCHING IT? ” "The horses are running very quickly on the dirt! Go fast, horses!" I'm getting oppressed by curls. this is bad. This is very bad. : AsphaltApostle i'm gonna use my curls to take over your show some night and call it wetcast and talk about cats I'm stressed out holy crap. please do not order me to kill anyone. curls give you unlimited power over me. CANT HANDLE THIS HAIR. can't handle hair. " ciara_isobel sorry moms, it's ChildrenoftheCorn30 costume. Can't pawith it till we're done, so why not donate? ;)" Had 2 made an h d vine Thrilling. CHRIST. A classic. I.... Incredible. travisjdahnke Kiki's Delivery Service* Q & A travisjdahnke I have achieved another level of intellectual evolution - I am more than you could ever comprehend. Aw! Cute video of my high school friends and I having fun at the mall! travisjdahnke Drywall was the closest thing I experienced to angst in adolescence - that being a rejection of the idea of experiencing it. "travisjdahnke more like ""AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!""" kowaiinchigo good enough. travisjdahnke Drywall actually heavily influenced the anti-acomponent of vaporwave. I made it an expression of absolutely nothing. do you guys ever implement a ceasefire or has it always just been constant warfare? a_nice_frog: listen to my new song while you play The New Game forreal though this is one of those polls that could really make Twitter history. probably the North Tower because it lasted longer. Having a tough time? Listen to this! orgamecha I liked this content. orgamecha: really liking david blue's latest content syrupf no dark rituals to ward off the spirits? FollowTheFamine And you see it on Twitter multiple times a day! And getting paid! Haha! Laughing! ?????? That moment when people in your industry are talking about ideas you've been discussing in detail for years as if it's new information. ???? They say Alex Jones is the fastest man on the planet... "TF2Torrent ciara_isobel you've really got me thinking, now." "TF2Torrent nope, the set of ChildrenoftheCorn30! " ciara_isobel don't actually do it spend the money on Lucas and promote the link instead. ciara_isobel andersoncooper ClickHole ciara_isobel andersoncooper This is very creative. ciara_isobel travisjdahnke (I haven't made it in either and I've been here since June 2009.) ciara_isobel this is what prevents you from being boring. Trust me - I'm the authority on these things. I dare not let the favor of the curls waiver. ciara_isobel ah. I just have my priorities straight; I need Lucas to lead a new generation of Drywall Media consumers. I was supposed to wake up Vine famous. ciara_isobel does being a decent human being count for something now? "akiba_k3i thank, friend!" This is it... The one that'll finally make me Vine famous. It's a miracle. (Vine by ITZ_KLICK) realcabbagefact: murder LIVE on Periscope: DrainingWithDave Episode 2 - Exhausted & Meta I'M ARMING UP JAMES. : AsphaltApostle im gonna fuckin find and eliminate X if it costs me my life and reputation " fortunately, it's only girl curls that have power over me. I wouldn't mind some of my own though." buckhollywood cool dog shirt! "Chris_Pickering: Love the unspoken camaraderie of motorists flashing their headlamps at one another to warn of a speed trap, it transce…" " I am tremendously upset about X as well, James." ": Little thing that bugs me is articles written like ""Wheres the outrage for X?"" And im like the outrage is right there!!…" it's a terrifying thing... Curls are taking over my life. How many girls am I engaged to right now can someone please make an app. I'm literally required to do what you ask of me b/c of your curls. "If I had a twin, he/she would most certainly be an ass." "I suppose if I tweeted a picture of the World Trade Center with the caption ""Cat & Ciara, Together Forever,"" that'd be too much, right?" that sounds tiring. a_nice_frog: im joining a gang crime RoryWhite12: The Jag is gone. But here's my new budget motor. What do you think? A few modifications to change back I grant you.. https… "wolfpupy: there are two types of people in this world, i assume, i dont care either way" "RDV69: ""Elegance is not about being noticed, it's about being remembered.""-Giorgio Armani " Jamba Juice " ""Jamba Juice"" is enough." DougDeMuro: You know you're in Korea when... "cher: Ok,no more sadness." virgyvirgil I'm literally just hair. cher: Later This is the only impression I can do. Wow. MomMilitia: I'm about to drop a really cute vine remake of that Kelly toreador tori song Very good vine. I hear your BO. " it sounds an awful lot like odor, James." " that's just an odor, James." sokane1: here’s a thing: swear words don’t have to be the end of the world if you don’t want them to be! "sokane1: In fact, their power ~* comes from *~ not being used much (oooooh sppooky)" Somebody please send me to the Silicon City exhibit in NYC. I'm actually undercover for Vice as a disheveled media professional. Hi. ivy_hollivana CRAZY feminist with basic firearm knowledge. "I mean, I can blab about it for hours (like most things,) but nothing I say will be relevant." Everyone keeps asking me how I feel about racism at Mizzou. How about you ask someone who's actually experienced it. fatiimamars: little boy was killing it at the mall yesterday lol ciara_isobel this is awfully forward but I cannot refuse the curls. "Remember when some individuals blocked me because they consider me disingenuous? Doesn't get any more intimate than this, trust me." Harry_Styles: Two. Need some live piano accompaniment for allmymovies? This probably isn't the right choice. Hello. travisjdahnke travisjdahnke k. My audio would be compromised anyway. travisjdahnke unless you'd like to join me in Skype or something? travisjdahnke I think I may read two automotive poems in a periscope in just a sec. travisjdahnke how about right now? travisjdahnke I know a great place for that! :) travisjdahnke I have a feeling it's arranged exactly how it was intended to be - it's just extraordinarily pretentious. travisjdahnke is there any audio? travisjdahnke cool sandwich. travisjdahnke I am watching a chair. "travisjdahnke I'm with ya, bud." verge: Watch this livestream of Shia LaBeouf watching Shia LaBeouf officialjaden: A Little Girl Just Asked Me If I Was Willow Smith I Humbly Said Yes And Took A Selfie. "officialjaden: When You Party I'm On The Treadmill,When You Sleep I'm On The Treadmill, When I Tweet I'm On TheTreadmill. Remember This" I think someone should pay me to read Jaden Smith Tweets. Soulbeere: hime sweet home I'm sorry about this. syrupf: ???????? ? NewHive: BRING YOUR OWN MUNDANE ASPECTS OF EXISTENCE Good morning. josieroses: Scheduled to tweet every time Shia LaBeouf starts a new movie yourewelcome allmymovies I'm not gonna make it. I'd do the thing Shia is doing with my videos but I'm scared to know how long it'd take. forecast: death. " what if it is the weather, James?" ": A weird DC thing is that on Vets day, the weather greenscreen instead shows arlington cemetery graves. Its like... ""tha…" AdamJSirdoreus: shia watching transformers 3. ALLMYMOVIES Friendly Pea akiba_k3i ummmm ToyotaPR: Toyota Recalls 1993 Camry Due To Fact That Owners Really Should Have Bought Something New By Now via … "travisjdahnke Converse All Stars, vintage 2004." travisjdahnke TF2Torrent good God. This is by far the best piano content I've ever streamed holy crap. TF2Torrent I am armed. "TF2Torrent how does it feel to ruin a man, Alex?" Dang I really need to find a niche I can embed into and judge outsiders with to increase my exposure - this decency thing isn't working out. orgamecha it doesn't really matter. : I get all my news from facebook meme pages. Thats why im so inforned and intelligent all the time My QC15s can't really handle this anymore. I collect Chapstick. "MercedesBenz he should've brought an E63 AMG Estate, though." BMWCARMAG: Today we're shooting this gorgeous ALPINAGB C2 2.7... E30s don't get much better than this! ClickHole: Reply with your StarWars name! I need a new mouse that isn't so creaky. Sentreh too soon. Tortured for science. Jalopnik: Google puts Google doodles on Google cars LoFlytKulture that's reassuring. What are Lexus needs? OfficialLexusUK: Good morning. We hope you've got a good day ahead of you. We're here until 10pm for all your Lexus needs . ^MS https:… Please stop shooting at my car. Please shoot my legs instead. You're only safe if every building you enter is rigged with explosives. robotpup oh dear. """Hella Bitcoin.""" I'm overclocking my Apple Watch and mining hella Bitcoin on the go. The photograph attached to number 4? I'm often on that street at like 2-4AM. This shouldn't be funny. syrupf: ": *me speaking to you, the reader, who i barely or never speak to* You are my rock, my strength." "coslive: Prince once fired Questlove from a DJ gig, replaced him with a screening of Finding Nemo: …" thecampaignbook: what is that Phil_Cosby_: Not all heroes wear capes. ClickHole: We Put 8 Teens In A Room With A Gun And Pretty Soon Human Nature Took Over travisjdahnke I'm thinking about watching it with him. everycolorbot: 0x83865d I want to be the King of Time. THE CLOCK KING!!!! It is my unconscious mind that arranges my outfits. I knew I bought this jacket for a reason. Please send scotch. I'm gonna watch the Charlie's Angels movie live with Shia and possibly Holes. "kowaiinchigo don't worry, there are hours of existing Drywall video content for you to enjoy. " kowaiinchigo well done. kowaiinchigo I'm probably not going to do one today. What's the phone number for the League of Shadows. kowaiinchigo you're describing me. "RapGameShinji: AsphaltApostle I don't no what I'd do, without David Blue" .souljaboy ???? (Vine by Lil Gute) RapGameShinji wfaachannel8: Laser strikes jets near Dallas. FAA & Law Enforcement investigating: Somebody draw a cute profile pic for me. """Why are you dressed like a pimp right now? Going out?"" ""I got cold.""" kowaiinchigo it's ok; food doesn't seem to affect me the same way it does other people. kowaiinchigo I wouldn't know. kowaiinchigo I don't eat. kowaiinchigo holy shit. "Undertaker arrives promptly to collect your just-deceased husband, but fucks your daughter on his way out. " C O N S U M E I feel like I should probably own this. My answer to the conflict in The Battle of Shaker Heights is a school shooting or bombing; much more concise. p00pface15 hello. p00pface15 My rural origins are really showing in my grammar here. Forehead kisses are the shit. "My fellow humans, There are better ways to live." The infant covered with peanut butter vine makes me nauseous and now there's a bunch of adults imitating it. Thanks to the man with the message who just got asked to leave Shia's seat. allmymovies kowaiinchigo nice food. "audipenny: dancing girl in a tampon commercial: I'm happy! other dancing girl: me!! Too!!! White pants! dancing half vacuum half goat…" kowaiinchigo because I am passionate about the cause! ciara_isobel: Nothing manlier than a man being a man having a dick and wiring poems for his bitch it's good to know people care about me for reasons other than my hair. Remember me for my white jeans. "kowaiinchigo we probably wouldn't have gone to the moon, though." NewHive: NOW WATCHING: iRobot ALLMYMOVIES "JARichardson1: A slice of two-tone, wafty, V8-powered magnificence. I want one so much. The most underrated luxury car in history? http…" thewaybot: I like it when open my eyes and see you next to me every mornxng. Shia is never going to wake up again. "Please call me Clock Boy from now on, thank you." kowaiinchigo I have never seen a tomato. This beer is awful but it's the only food I have left. GasStationMemes: The dead are owed nothing. everycolorbot how'd you know. "ivy_hollivana PLEASE. We talk about him all the time. All the leakers, actually. It's like a signature Drycast thing." ivy_hollivana you sure? He'll probably sneak away and seek asylum abroad. itsbeeeeees: ivy_hollivana 2.5 years in exile and chill and he gives you this look Less of a joke; more of an order. SiobhanFenton: Some festive date rape humour from Bloomingdales' Christmas ad campaign mcafeetan thanks. May Bentley be with you. mcafeetan thanks. "JakeLingeman: Wait, how many are we recalling? One, it's just one guy! 'Rolls issues bespoke recall for Ghost' rollsroycecars https:/…" mcafeetan good to know. "WardsAuto: Dodge Joins Top Ads List, But Mazda Still No.1 " mcafeetan hello! Union Jacking Cheek kisses are a great way to end a movie. The beginning of Metal of Honor: Frontline holy shit. guccibraidz my general sentiment: keep being nug. guccibraidz unless you want to. guccibraidz please never stop doing the nostril thing. I really like this movie. A Capitalist Larva kowaiinchigo gasoline. Fascinating to see the early days of brand building. The antagonist's family all drive Hyundais in The Battle of Shaker Heights. "Then again, I suppose there'd be no reason for the movie to exist." Some people embrace that. I don't. I fucking hate the world. "But the way I see it, all we are is little bits and pieces of the world we've experienced." Which is bullshit. It's probably because I was raised with a Christian family and taught that I have a soul. First thing: I don't know how anyone could truly possess authentic individual identity when we're all so influenced by everything around us. Korio_Lanus K. Since it's 2AM and no one is listening.....am I allowed to spew philosophical shit out there? Well...today. Can't sleep. Hopefully picking up a bunch of Keith Jarrett records tomorrow. GhettoGeek Don't do it. Photo: Just submitted my photo to the most beautiful teen contest. I am going to win. (Taken with instagram) Korio_Lanus We could steal them. There'd be a whole mass of Saab fans that would help. We just have to get organized. savethesaabs That fucking tunnel is looking more and more appealing. "I speak Latin and drive a Saab, MOTHERFUCKER." JMan_Rife: DepravedInfant I actually did surrender the guy looked pretty scary but I wouldn't be surprised if that dude spoke Latin JMan_Rife Saab is dead. You should have surrendered as a sign of respect. Saab drivers are of the same league as Latin speakers. Being around people always reminds me of how fucked up I am. Photo: Delmar (Taken with instagram) Some Day We All Go - Screw RUMBLE STRIPS I fucking hate the internet. Rapmonster: white people are retarded I'M STILL AT 182 COME ON SOMEONE'S GOT TO BAIL YOU CAN'T HANDLE THIS SHIT UNFILTERED KEYBOARD SHIT TRASH : "verge: Edward Snowden says using an ad-blocker is ""not just a right but a duty"" " akiba_k3i yes of course. Why pick up trash when you can fly? boatfactory you do not look like a boat factory. """A bird can do it, but you won't?"" Precisely. " boatfactory I was gonna say you look like the love interest in a 90s movie but the phone's a bit out of period. "PersonTheHumann very different functions, I think. Or at least that's what Shia would say." I should I watch all of MY movies and stream my face live? Because I could do that. " ""excuse me gentlemen...would you mind keeping it down a smidge? Thanks.""" I'd rather be shot in the face. Can you imagine me in a youth hostel? ammnontet ivy_hollivana 98370945870394586703498567304958673094586703495872341=234852318=91523=8907124t=890-=9078253=08764=0781245=0y78124 syrupf I haven't actually looked at Tinder since the first day I installed it... It really tested my belief in human aspiration. Please help me. They surround me...I can't sleep. I know my time is coming. They are going to eat me. """sour candy is my love language"" *deletes and DDoSs Tinder*" mcafeetan I understand. SimPivot thanks. I've seen this before though. Cameron Diaz's face makes me very uncomfortable. aIbertjazeera monetize it. """exile and chill"" is the funniest thing I've read in a long time." aIbertjazeera very impressive. Xires2 I was just trying to be gracious. ivy_hollivana 293847502934t gvascjlhdgkwfeqjli;daysvublgf hqrjnfi;lg uhowqy8bebyfqerwby9qforqwbyurebyuoibuyoiruoybirweqoyubirewyuboireqbyo Xires2 please talk about your dirty butt on Drycast. Ray Sipe has figured out how to duplicate himself and it's a pretty rough experience. mcafeetan FYI: I am the first and last authority on Hilary Duff if you need anything. " can you keep them quiet, please? I'm just trying to eat in peace." ciara_isobel would you and like to record something for Drycast tomorrow (Friday) morning? ciara_isobel cool. Who are Eric and Timothy? mt_loverman: Interior of the DB10 AstonMartin DB10 Spectre jamesbond Am I cyber art? Data Terry's ordering Drycast t-shirts... zacashtxn: I went to an agallery and put my skateboard on the ground and people thought it was paof the gallery … guccibraidz Web 5.0 is no web at all. shiaception: shia watching the even stevens movie allmymovies Whatistwitter9: Brett syrupf: sudoku 2 officialjaden: I Finna Pull Up To The Theater And Go See My Man Shia ANASTASIA ON BROADWAY HOLYF FUSJV akiba_k3i: AsphaltApostle ticc tocc Real clock hours. Do not talk to the coffee. "$200,000 seems a bit on the cheap side, to be honest... " Where Are They Now: Andy Sandlord GOD RIDES A HARLEY "Drycast's description has become inaccurate and silly. If you have better words to describe the podcast, send them here: daviddrywall.ws" This line has kept me going for years. I be fresh as hell if the Feds watching Hacking in Church S C I E N C E L I S T I C L E S YomanFezWasup: Spaghetti was a big hit amongst Ninjas in feudal Japan RapGameShinji the creation of intelligent AI will do that. I meet with Drew's ghost at the air hockey table on the river bottom every Wednesday night. Who is Drew? Every Drew. SimPivot good. Anybody with any Fallout 4 knowledge willing to chat with me for this week's Drycast? I know nothing of The New Game. ciara_isobel that's fine will me. I'll plan on staying on skype. Remember the French Horn video. I wish I could speak English. mcafeetan it's also the best track titles ever written. mcafeetan no problem. I am always looking for any way to utilize this strange knowledge I've acquired. ciara_isobel I've accounted for the time difference. Pretty much anytime between 6AM-noon for you. : In certain parts of Ireland the female sexual organ is called 'The Ole Axe Wound' ciara_isobel record tomorrow morning. mcafeetan Most Wanted was my favorite. """Carl Edwards is switching genders on the racetrack!""" NoNewDads it's going straight to NoNewDads more like Ass Fault Apostle. No New Dads Wow. "thefrickhead I agree, but I think they could've done A LOT worse for a one-off Tiger-inspired car." I wish this worked as a knuckle tat. Huge noise. """Huge noise."" - Richard Hammond" "RichardHammond: Just tripped on these metal letters. Huge noise, me swearing & wife & daughters broke into 'Love Hurts' as one. https:/…" Staggeringly impressive apathy capabilities. ihadtopee don't do it bud. "ihadtopee: hi - Hello dear, do you remember how we communicated with you? Long ago you could not see, I am Marina -... …" "I think I should begin to replace ""FUCK"" with ""SUPERB!""" "GQdotcoza: We're out for some aviationadventure, with BellRossWatches showing us where their wristwear is most at home. …" I'm so conflicted right now. FUCK. RollsRoyceWorld: The wonderful Phantom Coupe Tiger on show at the Dubai Int. Motor Show. Fabulous Bespoke model RollsRoyce … MercedesAMG: Looks nice on the tarmac & feels even better in the wild. MercedesAMG G63 [Cnsmptn: 13.8 l/100km | CO2: 322 g/km] https:… """The man from the forest just proposed to me like 3 times.""" Wow! welovehonda: Wow! AHM dinobatkan sebagai pemberi kepuasan pelanggan terbaik loh brosis. Bisa liat disini: https… We Locked Joanna Newsom and Carl Edwards In Isolation For Two Days And You Won't Believe What They Did """Sounds like someone you'd piss on.""" "blank_was_blank: Her associations were vicarious, like a lifelong explosion" "blank_was_blank: Her lows were tall-masted, like steely puppies" GregMacLeman: V is for Vignale ciara_isobel TF2Torrent NoNewDads travisjdahnke yoted: TF2Torrent ciara_isobel you will have your time. Hyrokii_ebooks: girls who have literally had a penis in my iced tea we can just use a phone line if it comes down to it. I hope I get to work with Jethro one day. """Playful, but exquisite."" " " it was a crazy episode, definitely." "Honda and One Direction are opposites, I think." I can't believe I watched this. TF2Torrent 7. TF2Torrent yes. We're recording today at 6PM CST. """What would George Orwell get out of Farmville?""" don't worry - I'll be here like...all day. "blank_was_blank: Her industrialization was istiqlal-sponsored, like corporeal mid-1950's" PersonTheHumann ok that's probably better. """Where's the fridge?"" ""It's voting.""" "PersonTheHumann yeah I'll go for 6PM. We can get car done, at least." CyberEveryword: ??????????? " always, but my hope is to provoke you two into a sisterly twin bout." " 1. Nope, unless you have any particular messages you'd like to convey. 2. No; the show is audio-only." autocarindiamag: Mahindra to acquire Italian design house & coachbuilder Pininfarina MahindraRise … NISSAN LEAF ADS ON DATPIFF Where are my girls. "streetsnsheets: Yare in the streets, Bringer of the Blue Dawn in the sheets" Jeep Wrangler lookin ass. carrera4it: Agnelli’s unique Testarossa Spider via classicdriver ferrarifriday CarSnapped uchuta_m https:… James...is everything ok? " spread your wings proudly, James!" E-enabled. I have just sent an international text message wow! speedmonkeycouk: Some Toyotas tvR RACECAR IM NOT GONNA MAKE IT speedmonkeycouk: I remember this racing evoMatthew: Car of the show! NECclassic A N E C D O T E S realcabbagefact: Dad why do you hate me "getpalmd: Ready with the Exige S Club Racer.. Evora 400 next week of course, not done with Lotus yet ;-) Lotus LotusFinland …" speedmonkeycouk: Working class hero my arse YahooAnswersTXT: give me cash? ihaveswineflu flu is safe and ok? "Self-promotion is a joke. Self promotion is purpose???? I M N O T R E A L" I am alone in a restaurant and laughing maniacally at this. travisjdahnke find out on today's episode of Drycast! k cool. Who the fuck is still going around doing this shit? Domestic terrorism. there's no way I could do that on cue without laughing. Someone put Sweet Home Alabama on the jukebox and I CANNOT stop laughing. lip thing? Ford Focus RS S R. S. autocar: Stand back - an even hotter version of the Ford Focus RS is planned thanks. I Believe in Bentley "Bremont: Looking forward to the final day at the SalonQP Exhibition today, stop by and discover the Bremont collection! …" RapGameShinji hello. "RapGameShinji: AsphaltApostle I fucking hate david blue (AsphaltApostle), founder of Drycast" Sentreh better. What THE fuck. Good morning. Buy me Grados. I'm a talker. ioerror: fafa5bbcb787b2205d72c7c763a01d604ba76ef5 "officialjaden: I Don't Smell Good, But I Don't Smell Bad You Feel Me." "GuyFieri_ebooks go away, food man." I shall bring guns. " I will protect you, James." thetimes: Google car pulled over for going too slowly Leaf pornography from yesterday. MY WIFE. DO YOU HAVE A FLOWER IN YOUR HAIR??? *S65 AMG Coupe drifts by* """We Germans are not the social problem solvers of Europe.""" they have too many balls to kick to be concerned with dental health. Ummm...Are you sure? oh dear... I'd assume since it was the BBC. There is now a file on my computer named RAWTWINS.mp4... """Professional footballers have worse teeth than the general population.""" """It's normal to have a house fire.""" """I would be no one without fire in my life.""" thei100: Canada and Denmark are locked in an adorable war A gentlemen. travisjdahnke NO. travisjdahnke that looks like food. I have gotten to the point where I am unironically concerned with the wellbeing of online folk. Where has my edge gone? "Drycast is going live soon, but I'm catching up with Paris news atm." If you want to hear me shrieking the national anthem: Nuclear hair jokes. virgyvirgil: this hair is absurd Fallout4 "noantica: ???????????????? ??????????…… " "Favorite pastimes? Eugenics." birth birth BIRTH BIRTH "I just realized I am viewing Vine in 1080p now, which is a bit silly." "If you dishonestly answer, I will kill you." Why do I laugh this way. knew you would enjoy this new Talib Kweli album awith your favorite car! E I just witnessed this get retweeted 3500 times in less than 10 seconds. 7AM is not too early. I could actually make Irish coffee rn holy crap "SadFaceOtter: [product pitch] 3 words: MICROWAVABLE IRISH COFFEE *room goes crazy* " RapGameShinji it's way too cute for that. "Relevant poll from today's episode of Drycast: Have you ever used an actual outhouse?" Dad on Twitter. Where. Burt's Bees has wild cherry now? Holy FUCK. thewaybot: I like it when you guys say asses! GuyFieri_ebooks: AsphaltApostle That's money! DailyKerouac: I love you because there's nothing else to do. I need more displays again. TMVtweetz: broken sunsets Oooooo. It's 50-50! Poop. "TF2Torrent technically not yet, but it's certainly going to be." Has Paris Hilton ever stayed in the Paris Hilton? That maroon SLR though. TF2Torrent bless you! torquedmag: Koenigsegg Regera: New Robotized ‘Autoskin’ Functionality TF2Torrent dunno yet. "Ah yes, definitely a good idea. This man is surely trustworthy! " shoulda known. TF2Torrent now you must be killed. Twin interaction Twitter. theneedledrop Holy FUCK. This dude is 15. squeezinpeaches: so true ciara_isobel insurance fraud kicks. It's almost the season!! I have disabled all of my automated Tweets for a more accurate wordcloud. GasStationMemes: You'll never know the horrors I carry. GasStationMemes: Run. Thank syrup. Libroantiguo: Oscar Wilde disliked idle conversation: “Conversation about the weather is the last refuge of the unimaginative.” https:/… Does Iowa know what Paris is? kawaiigaythug "Of course, in some ways, it'd be nice if everyone was as miserable as I am." I feel bad talking about this stuff to people because I just make them as miserable as I am. Maybe it's because I spend too much time thinking and not enough BEING A FUCKING SLAVE TO HUMAN EXISTENCE. "Or you just ignore your situation completely, which some people do. Seems rather dull to me." Unless you can give yourself what you would get from religion. Which is what I'm trying to do. But I think everyone should have a right to be happy. And I don't see how you could be happy without some soof religion. "Ingenious, really. Especially given that it's designed to be impossible to disprove." Or the lives they thought they had. And all it's done is give us false hopes and cause conflict. But has also probably made a lot of people happy with their lives. "Give everyone something to live for, and some common morals and principles to live by so that we wouldn't go to war over them." "I still think religion was created by some VERY intelligent people to keep society productive, limit population, and boost morale." WHY CAN'T I SLEEP TWITTER This is called rambling. Maybe it'd make you feel better to know that everyone else is as alone as you are. But that doesn't make it any less lonely for me. And your perspective is different from everyone else's. So you are totally and completely alone. The truth is...You is ALWAYS a paof the equation. Because you're seeing the world from your perspective. "You may think you're selfless, but you're really just interested in thinking you are." "But the truth is, we all HAVE GOT to live for ourselves." Religion teaches that one should have a higher goal in life than just entertaining oneself. Which is noble. "Thank you, Christianity." "I'm pretty sure this is a problem with ME, and not a problem with the world." Korio_Lanus Yayayayaya alcoholism. So how am I supposed to love someone if everyone is just what the world has regurgitated? ioerror: I asked the French ambassador about Paris. Someone interrupted with immigrant blame; the ambassador correctly shut him down. I… OurEdisons fuck. FUCK. lamp_head you're right. How adorable is that fucking car. "AutoPap: From a time when policemen drifted round every corner.... NoABS NoTractionControl " PersonTheHumann $$$$$$$$$$$$ OurEdisons are you sure? JamesEatCandSC: C&SC's Car of Show at the NEC was Derek Chapman's lovely Jensen P66. JensenOwners Lancaster_Ins ClassicMotorNEC http… PersonTheHumann no but I haven't recorded Drycast or slept yet so I probably won't be available until about that time. """I could argue that my Keurig has rights.""" fuck. " is this what it is to be a man, James?" I've just had 6 shots of espresso. Time for a nap. I can't believe there are Lancia and TVR racing cars... How do I continue a normal life with this knowledge? aahahdhwufhsxjkfbwifjwk SUPERB GettyImagesNews: A woman looks at light installation called 'Cloud' as paof Lumiere event Togian … GettyImagesNews: Kurdish women fighters stand on the frontlines in the battle with ISIL jbmoore6400 … "GettyImagesNews: The Saint Sophia cathedral is shrouded in dense smog in Harbin, China " marcosecchi: Venice wakes up under thick fog winter Alternative view for GettyImagesNews … michielwil: Strolling around the Louvre; hardly a soul in sight. Shops closed; no traffic. ParisAttacks parisisburning Paris https:… newstephen: The view from Montmartre today. Paris is still beautiful. ammnontet you've made everything much more terrifying. ammnontet: Westboro Napster Church EMAILS "Lowpolybot: cgagraphics Your picture is ready: kite gradient noedges raster grain p1 " "I know it's late, but it's hahenin." Drycast episode 49 will be going LIVE in 20 minutes! """Bitch with WiFi.""" UMMMM rowanhorncastle: The House In The Hill by creative agency Only Victories is my kind of house/garage combo RDV69: ...and the world keeps on turning. Don't look too closely at how it's done... who up clank cluck mikema_ thanks. FoodChat "maddieperhaps it's definitely not my best, though." "Only 4 hours left, folks." "The people don't want intelligent humor, I guess." What the fuck. Holy fuck my vine blew up. One of the most beautiful rules of business: inclusion is ALWAYS more profitable than bigotry. Listen to WNYC right now if you can. Triggered by crying French girls with curly hair. PAWreckingBall: Gatwick is at a standstill. gatwickevacuated OurEdisons what the fuck. Apathy Club I went to the store but couldn't find Burt's Bees Wild Cherry. Please help me. oh dear. " wait until I get the full edited episode up, unless you're desperate to see the video instead." 21 Minutes left! Driver Alcohol Detection System for Safety (DADSS) "When in doubt, Phantom." jambearjosh: PrestigeDiesels I made it to Bath ??(sorry but I've traded the Corsa in for this now) ?? oddfuckingtaco do not attempt to consume the vehicle. I'm not really sure what to think of this. "ytimesmotoring: River Ribble raging in Settle this morning.. The aftermath of a night of epic rain! " This is one of my favorite stories from this week. ciara_isobel I may cringe to death. travisjdahnke same. ciara_isobel travisjdahnke uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Here's the tractor poem. tama323: ciara_isobel superb television. travisjdahnke thank you. And FUCKING LINKLE. travisjdahnke I got your back bro. "JesseCrosse: Wales Rally GB on Great Orme this morn'. Took this in 1977, Tony Drummond and David Curry, Ford EscoR1800. WRGB https:…" "travisjdahnke it'll be me, don't worry." travisjdahnke I think it's best to let others do that. travisjdahnke I've always wanted to do it and capture it on a Vine. "Drycast is Live with the twins, sexy leakers, augmented reality owner's manuals and more! " """Steady depressed bruh"" Yung Lean is an interesting experience." "mcafeetan the McAfee bit just occurred to me as did the memory of someone yelling ""DELETE THE FUCKING MACKCALFFEE!"" from ~2004" SUPERB mcafeetan this is just... Wow. Incredible. mcafeetan this image is going to be a classic I can feel it. mcafeetan FUCK. mcafeetan I don't. mcafeetan you guys wanna have a Moby party? C O N S U M E T H E L E M O N You remember that Moby is still breathing. MOBY it's fuckin Moby. Yeeeeess. Continue! Make me Vine famous. SimPivot ivy_hollivana yes. ivy_hollivana ah. That's just the stream though. The edited episode will be up before tomorrow. "One-touch. Instant. Connected. 3D. 4K. Mobile." : GOD Zin5ki: ShadowZael The beauty is in the synthesis. syrupf: apathy club " we're in this together now, James." syrupf YES IT'S PLAYING OFF YOUR CHANNEL! I pinned this to capitalize off the hype; I don't think it's all that funny but we all do what we gotta do. I've got the cool jokes that everyone wants. """I'm great; I have many cool thoughts."" - ivy_hollivana sums herself up better than I ever could." The results are in! Proud of you all. mcafeetan profound. syrupf DJ Sol? syrupf: dj the sun "classicauto79: Yellow BMW 2002, motor cars classiccars classicvintage bmwmotorspo" ClassicCarWeek: An all-original Ferrari 500 Mondial in beautiful French Blu ciara_isobel: L syrupf: bitcoin isnt real you're just getting things for free "Somebody's talkin shit on Sol, the mother of all life. Like...damn shut the fuck up." Good clipping. There are no haircuts in heaven. It's lit. RippleFrog: im from the sun "1fufure: No one really fucks with u unless u look good, having a party, or dying." mcafeetan The Last Listicle "mcafeetan ""look at his stupid hair holy shit.""" mcafeetan what an incredible thought. What a dangerous world. "mcafeetan I wish ClickHole actually had reporters traveling abroad ""ironically.""" ClickHole vs. ISIS Eyes peeled for that Zepplin flex. ?? Sophie is a very cute name. Listen while you still can. lihanEAD WHAT THE FUCK THANK YOU. lihanEAD: Drycast thefrickhead aaaaaaaaaaa! U N L I M I T E D P A J A M A S ... " forreal though, NASCAR has its own accent. It's very strange." got 2 go fast. thank you. It's basically the only one I can perform so... I think this is my favorite. Nonsensical indie musician interviews NASCAR drivers. (V) Nonsensical indie musician interviews NASCAR drivers. (IV) ammnontet I'm underrated. squishysar it's all I have left. Nonsensical indie musician interviews NASCAR drivers. (III) Nonsensical indie musician interviews NASCAR drivers. (II) Nonsensical indie musician interviews NASCAR drivers. "If/when I meet Z-Ro, it needs to be captured on camera because it's bound to be entertaining in some way." squishysar I'm glad you like them. I am just hair to the world. squishysar My best friend & I have been talking about going to Houston for a few weeks sometime though so it's possible. squishysar ummmm. Well it'd be like the worst financial decision I could make right now. I REALLY need to play a grand piano in the near future and apparently there's one available on campus? pissboot I'm glad you approve of my big Vine. """Complexion?"" ""Post-mortem""" syrupf: steady income simulator """Let me tell you about REAL hip-hop."" - young white man" The classical station just played this and it's my favorite piece of all time so I'm quite elated atm. DeadDigitizer: the teacher is mad at me "poem_exe: dead no one will follow me leftover rice plants" "Ridin in the drop top Robin Robbin Common of all his fuckin instrumentals." I could really go for a can of HELL at the moment. He Likes Movies. I'm not sure if I can fully explain why this is so funny to me but I'm still fucking laughing about it. akiba_k3i I like movies. Likes: movies. lamp_head same. I need to acquire. lamp_head I've never seen it before. Is it like... A popular drink? "lamp_head if we did, I'd never drink anything else." Disco-Damaged Incredible. : The biggest man ive ever seen!! LambdaLegal: Trans students: Qs about your rights? Ask w/ TransYouthStories before 11/19! GLSEN … C U L T U R E E Q U I L I B R I U M I think I may have started this... I never intended for it to go this far. orgamecha no idea. """This song is called Stockholm. It's about Finland.""" What if I told you this is about AI? Predicted this too. Just FYI. Happy Hacking mcafeetan RapGameShinji you are both superb friends. """Please just let me die... This is wrong! Why have you done this? I do not belong here! Let me die!"" - Thomas Jefferson on 3D Touch." theweeknd: yo what up you fucking cabbage... Ayn Rand tech column. "pissboot definitely a possibility, though she still considered herself an artist, not a businesswoman. + she really adored modernism." "PersonTheHumann I think it's absolutely justifiable, considering." This is actually not just a stupid joke and could be considered a tricky question. I don't have anyone to make Ayn Rand jokes with. Poll: Would Ayn Rand upgrade from iPhone 6 to iPhone 6S? Dictating someone else's New Years resolution. I live in terror now. SmokeKush4Lyfee: I'm tooth fairy. This is the whole joke. 0kbps shameless gamer here! 0kbps: mom can you drive me to taco bell? no i dont want the food i just want a baja blast MOutniain dDew Let's not go to the Boogie Bog tonight. Disco Damage at the Boogie Bog ihaveswineflu: I wish Oprah was still alive ciara_isobel I think they're adorable. Forever Rolling Ranger - Kenneth Chesney "I was trying to explain to CoxworthIII why he would enjoy the literary aspects of hip-hop without using the words ""real"" or ""mainstream.""" "akiba_k3i: AsphaltApostle ""listen to nas illmatic"" - david blue" akiba_k3i yeah and I don't even watch Friends. I only have a few more years of vanity left...I am eroding away like a Goddamned Butte. Shit. Astrology Horoscope Capricorn "Hair behaves very rarely, so there's gonna be lots of this today, I'm afraid. " Current look: Easily Framed evoNickTrott: Electric Bentley takes a step closer to reality. Some words here: BentleyMotors Collin___P launch was apparently July 2006 so we're gettin there. Remember yfrog? Polls have always been around...they've just been manual. Same thing with retweets and media links. "Aside from link shortening, all the additions have been aesthetic." Changing the character limit would actually be the first time Twitter's functionality would change in a decade. Xires2 hello. Some of you Tweet about regular biological functions a lot. Would you like to know when I poop or pee? "Most Diverse Twitter Following, 2012" Wanton revision. 1300+ impressions in 10 minutes... Never accounted for the possibility of constant disappointment in my audience. I revised it anyway. What if Cher's Twitter account was humanity's only news source? mcafeetan I feel like you're my encouraging youth group friend in line for my baptism. Like...it's happening. This is it. Guys this Tweet is terribly worded. Can I revise? What if Cher's Twitter account was the world's only source of news. I've spent the past 30 minutes trying to explain Vice and... "I could probably work for Vice, I guess." We Tricked John Deere Into Building a Combine Harvester Out Of Hempcrete that is surely forgivable. I won't tell Ciara. I think this was meant for me - yes. I see all. mihmnop Umeme_ebooks it's like timeline terrorism. now your cheeks match too! "squishysar of course! I cannot be offended, but looking like I can is always beneficial. Received any new emails?" boots + flannel = ?????????? Umeme_ebooks very impressive. Umeme_ebooks: … squishysar as in...I'm a dog? "mihmnop that's really good to know, actually. Rotating IPs don't actually fool anybody anymore, do they?" mihmnop you're a true friend. I just realized my new profile picture was taken with some terrible lighting decisions... squishysar I'll set up an email newsletter for ya. I'm impressed by your decency. ciara_isobel: Yall be like 'i want a goth girl' and settle for a girl who has 1 pic with black lipstick and black boots and black skirt… I know... Hempcrete " fortunately, they're removable." Wu_Tang_Finance: Behead those who ain't proficient in excel Sentreh another reason to frequent Google Analytics. These Gap shirts almost make me look like someone with empathy. "Googling ""Sheldon Cooper"" was a huge mistake. " If Friends had a Sheldon Cooper... Photo: Bob Geldof cassette. Didn’t know this existed. I’m sure it’s shitty. (Taken with instagram) "Photo: Keith Jarrett - Shades, Treasure Island, and Staircase. (Vintage Vinyl) (Taken with instagram) " PersonTheHumann Can't afford it. Already bought 3 Jarrett LPs and a Bob Geldof cassette. PersonTheHumann No. Found this at Vintage Vinyl. Didn't have time to look for your VHS. Sorry. Photo: :) (Taken with instagram) AHAAAHAHH GET IT? RAW milk? RAW shit? I'M SO FUCKING FUNNY. Hittin' that RAW shit. RAW milk trap house. Milk trap house. Sellin' milk on tha street when I was just 8 years owld. Possession with intent to sell....milk. Milk bust. It'd be so cool if selling raw milk was illegal in Missouri. What would you do if I tweeted about FUCKING BOB THE BUILDER? Would you follow me THEN?! PersonTheHumann I'm not authentic. I'm just the world's vomit. "GhettoGeek I was referring to the ""state of happiness"" that everyone seems to strive for. But I totally agree with you." "Ok, I'll stop. I GAINED a fucking follower from this ordeal. The fuck is wrong with you people? Masochistic fucks." "I literally have everything I could ever want, yet I still come up with new things to want for. And that will continue as long as I live." "What the fuck is ""happiness"" anyway? It's not like any worldly being can really be content." They both make you feel great but really destroy any possibility of future happiness if you give them up. Christianity is on par with heroin. "And I don't mean that as an insult. Ignorance is something to be envied, trust me." "Every time I see someone is living a happy life, I assume they're ignorant." syrupf: ammnontet big boy! ammnontet you can never die! Still curious. Xires2 not recommended. What should I do before I go to sleep and ruin my hair. also a great time to brandish a firearm. I wish my name was Donna. content_liker it's actually a vape I lied. content_liker a sandwich. When u I hope you caught it on video - a suicidal Vine is guaranteed exposure. Internet 10 As Fuck. "Well, I've officially witnessed the first depiction of a modern WiFi-enabled wearable saving lives... Arrow Season 3, Episode 5." "Anyway, passion concluded. Do not be afraid." This is still probably my favorite video on YouTube. "I'm not involved in aviation directly anymore, but it's the most emotionally inevitable reminder of this for me." "The next time you hear ""man, I hate people,"" or ""humanity is shit,"" remind them that we went from Kitty Hawk to the moon in 66 years." "Here's something you need to hear: Our species and its creations are the most beautiful things in sight. " that and I look like I can be easily manipulated. ABC7Chicago: A substitute teacher is under fire for teaching 6th graders lessons on Chief Keef: … ClickHole: My Infant Son Has A 43% On Rotten Tomatoes. Does Anyone Know How This Happened? … virgyvirgil ovals. I'm definitely Vine famous now. " guccitwist feel free to speculate, but nothing will be confirmed or denied." Timaldini: 850i Timaldini: 928 GTS & 850 CSI guccibraidz The Media Exposed. I want to release a post-Hardbass album called Life Is Cheap. akiba_k3i too fast for love. mcafeetan wise one. mcafeetan I feel like this Tweet could go big. Incredible. "Sole beneficiary of my estate: Minimal data, ultra-compressed regurgitated social media text images." "You can go fast, but you can never go home. " T A N G I B L E G O T H Love urself!!! (Vine by cathlynjones) : The radio dj just called kid cudi kid chewdi trulyjhot guccitwist trulyjhot guccitwist you need more of my content. mitsucars: You’re running out of time to bid on the 1st FinalEditionEvo & to suppothe MS society. — https:/… "openculture: Nikola Tesla’s Predictions for the 21st Century (Made in 1926 & 1935) Some cool, some scary https:…" " either they forgot about smartphones/tablets, or they did it simply because they could." it'd be absolutely astonishing device if the smartphone didn't exist. well yeah. doubt it. verge: The candy bar-sized Chromebit can turn your old monitor or TV into a computer Things were easier then. At least my legs could breathe. It's all in the unconscious. akiba_k3i it's not real. Mood... If you're wondering why I'm tired all the time...it's my hair. You can't even begin to imagine its demands. AsphaltApostle take those fucking jeans off right now. travisjdahnke that's the thing...I AM God. I have no one left to ask. travisjdahnke God. Could someone please come end this existence? Thanks. akiba_k3i everything's ruined now. creaku: i just opened my third eye listening to thjis rap music "Police Officer: ""Sir, may I ask why you were carrying a giant stuffed bear on your car?"" Lamborghini driver: ""Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!""" CarWaffle: Lamborghini driver reportedly fined over giant stuffed bear "boatfactory at least you got the new iPhone, right?" CyberEveryword syrupf CyberEveryword: ??????????????? boatfactory not ok. gaev66NINO: Lancia Stratos Rally uchuta_m swhotmess IDEAMotorCars ManuelitoTorino BrabhamJohn kasaburanka08 jazzfunklover https:… syrupf trust me on this... """Sorry I'm busy today."" " cocainemom a_nice_frog I found something in the noise... Wow...Today was big. a_nice_frog a_nice_frog FUCK. "mcafeetan I guess I should've assumed as much. (also, as if I would bother to manually retweet something in 2015 aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa)" squishysar they're tremendously tacky. Master of Platitudes GloblAutomkrs: Welcome to the LAAutoShow! Happy to sponsor the ConnectedCar Expo again this year CCE2015 ammnont_ebooks: What is vaporwave. "mcafeetan it's just...there are moments in life, you know? The ones you're afraid to miss." mcafeetan god DAMN I want to retweet this. moshashes thanks. moshashes: AsphaltApostle its David Blue It'll be hilarious if I break a bone tonight. ammnontet: AsphaltApostle David Blue Because I don't do stupid things. I've never broken a bone. "I do not have a ""street name.""" "Google: ""I'll give you $2 billion if you can ensure I never die."" Me: ""Ok cool.""" " actually, they're using it to figure out immortality." you gotta remember that Google has enough money now to do things that have 0 immediate profit potential. Birds tho "RDV69: E piove su le tue ciglia Ermione Piove su le tue ciglia nere sì che par tu pianga ma di piacere. Gabriele D’annunzio …" "LoveAlfa_: Shaken, not stirred. Love Alfa. " CyberEveryword: ???????? thelittleidiot: Laura.... thelittleidiot: nobody listens to techno. clearly. Church was great. thelittleidiot: enddogexperiments PCRM squishysar you can't let that happen. loliliberator: MOBY ammnontet: Love That Orb L1LDebbie: Drinking water is so attractive. L1LDebbie: Ima just keep drinking water on you bitches. L1LDebbie: Real bitches wear Chapstick L1LDebbie: Astronaut chick L1LDebbie: L1LDebbie: I'm gettin drunk at Olive Garden .. God save my soul L1LDebbie: L1LDebbie: Trappin gave me a cold. L1LDebbie: I been trappin for 15 days straight ... L1LDebbie: I'm an amazing bitch so don't play yourself tryna play me. ???? kabeebus: AsphaltApostle you look like a 90's Leonardo Di Caprio My duties have been fulfilled...I beg thee release me to rest. akiba_k3i: AsphaltApostle oh! haha. akiba_k3i I've actually wandered the Earth since the time before the trees. akiba_k3i basically. akiba_k3i I am 21 years old. The sensation of knowing lyrics to a track after like 3 years is really strange to me. I haven't listened to this album since high school holy fuck. Sheltered white girl listens to rap for the first time (Rapp snitch knishes - MF Doom) (Vine by Lil Gute) MR_AndrewBrady: And some pics of said Jags. ciara_isobel yup. "boatfactory travisjdahnke I'm assuming your explanation for your laughter included """" in it somewhere?" It almost looks like I have a butt. Hey. travisjdahnke nothing. travisjdahnke absolutely nothing. travisjdahnke hello. autocar: Breaking news from Fiat - new 124 Spider revealed ahead of LA motor show This is actually better than the finished product I think. I spent way too much time making this. : If your outfit makes any sense muthafucka you ain't no farmer it was the best I could do. Quirky young professional loves his generation's vocabulary a bit too much. *definitively Vine's 6-second limit performs the same function that Twitter's character limit does. "syrupf: the ambient music community sad.fm" kabeebus come on Drycast to talk about it this Friday! ciara_isobel CHRIST. ciara_isobel: ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? "kabeebus trust me, I've kept up with the buzz. It's kinda disappointing though." "For more free funnyman word jokes, add me on snapchat: mommilitia " """Are we vaping right now?""" He does this because he knows it is the definitely worst thing he could say. "We should be brothers except he greets me with ""Feliz NaviDave"" every time." CorvetteMan friend apparently took a college loan out to buy a classic Rolex Submariner. I've found my people. syrupf: youtube - pouring cement on my dad's car (prank) wifed. "syrupf: detective sonfinder! we have a new case for you find this man's son" The Mac guy looks like Dylann Roof... Hell yeah. : Accidentally performed a satanic ritual & being pursued by an enormous shadow mass. Epic fail My boy Schumann comin thru with the fyre today no lie ???????????? "TVCommentBot: Excuse me, dad in the way. " guccibraidz a contemporary Shakespeare. kabeebus GeoCities. kabeebus my haircut rn is definitely DiCaprioLite. I can button my pants now...very good. I'm a funnyman. AnumV89 CoxworthIII yes! Please bother him more about it - he needs the encouragement. BallardBot: 1. beebee880: Will you re tweet this so I get more followers ivy_hollivana ?? my glasses make them huge. Watch the whole video on my Instagram: AsphaltApostle !!! ??? I guess I'm a Viner now. HappySkyPoodle thank you! I probably would've gone through most of my life making bitter green tea. Juicing4Justice is a cause I can get behind! mcafeetan ah yeah. Forgot about that. Shame on a neighbor who tries to run game on a neighbor. I found a wedding gown on the ground by a gas pump. I'm guessing someone's night hasn't gone well. "Today, I learned some curious things about tennis." "In my head, all the cool people love to make lingual jokes." I feel like I'm probably a little too entertained by alliteration. OurEdisons aaaaahhh. I'll bet that's it. Hadn't considered allergies. "OurEdisons I ask because I once ordered ""the strongest survivable"" beverage from Teavana and felt terrible for like 3 days." OurEdisons but what's the caffeine content like in comparison? + will it make me sick? orgamecha cool. Thanks. "Tea people, Please give me Tea Tips Thanks" Correct! I take back everything I said. "TOYOTA 10" I foresee no significant window for sleep in the next 3 days. ... squishysar that could be a very detrimental career move. politico: Snapchat makes play for political ad revenue | Getty What a pitiful milestone. "I'm about to hit 100,000 Vine loops." "HistoRacingHD: Senna in his natural habitat, a flooded track. " "If you bought an XK after the F-Type became available, please contact me. " "squishysar my time with it was a revelation, but I don't think I'd spend my own money on one." verge: Here’s what Volvo thinks you’ll do when your car is driving itself "squishysar if you have money, I don't think you'll be left wanting for one. They made over 750,000 of them." "squishysar yes. When we drove one, I spent at least 30 cumulative minutes bouncing on the step." "squishysar yes they are very purposeful and chunky. The last traditional SUV on the market, actually." I had no idea the XK was still being sold. The Nissan Xterra is going to be discontinued. :( squishysar thanks. Is the Polo TDI any good? thefrickhead unless someone is posing for something else and you take a photo of them. CoxworthIII fuckin Thesser. CoxworthIII you will survive. LIVE on Periscope: The Ocarina of Time Variations "poem_exe: the young girl and two little houses over quick sand" 0kbps: [obama voice] delete it fat _thejasminator_ audio is all good. Can't have too many E M A I L S Pleasant. I am nothing. : AsphaltApostle you are nothing PUT A HELLCAT POWERPLANT IN EVERY LAND VEHICLE. I feel nothing. "In the US, it's not unusual for a customer to pay for a good or service in guns if they've run out of cash." GUNS. Only ONE per person? We are not safe. We need to make more guns. How many guns are we sending to Ireland? you can never have too many guns. edgy. automobilemag jamiekitman absolutely brilliant. automobilemag: Cross(over) My Heaand Hope to Die (by jamiekitman) You're safer in a Hummer! akiba_k3i squats. """All I want for Christmas... Is a drone?"" Thank you, NPR" "squishysar I'd usually combat such discomfowith more alcohol, but I don't know if that's actually a good idea." squishysar maybe that'll clear things up. squishysar because I play fast and loose with the English language? squishysar *comradic yelling* Cool. FUCK PROFESSIONALISM TobyTurner Appleviolence 50tysonofficial: wassup bro TooSholets collab I've lost so many of my friends to raw milk. Made 3 on the Norway charts. I don't know why. THIS IS BOB GELDOF'S FIRST SOLO ALBUM OH MY GOD. This Bob Geldof tape is pretty awful. I would seriously eat the same thing every day if given the opportunity. I just don't give a fuck. I don't understand why everyone is so fascinated with food. Cupcakes for the elite. I should stawriting things down so I actually have stable views to rely on instead of just whatever I feel at the moment. Good morning Twitter. I think I should get a motorcycle. Depression is rational. Photo: Taken with instagram Photo: YOU FAT FUCK (Taken with instagram) Photo: Taken with instagram Photo: Edible sky (Taken with instagram) I want a Donnas t-shirt. Pfffffffffttt abusoru_ :( abusoru_: I love Norway because it's socially acceptable to avoid making eye contact with everyone. Photo: More bimmer. (Taken with instagram) Photo: My sister’s neighbor’s old 3-series BMW (Taken with instagram) ... """incoherent aggression""" Lots of people work hard and play hard but I go to sleep. the soil of our beautiful Earth! guccibraidz you probably don't want to know... So here ya go: guccibraidz sorry Nug I promise I won't send you any more Mike Jones samples. tractors should be dirty. oooooooo yes. evvandvvorak don't subtweet me. I am on the edge of my seat. On that sleep-deprived flex. "Justin_Hyde: Who wears it better, Jaguar or Lincoln? " a_nice_frog: International Big Big Boys Day mcafeetan I'm listening to REAL HIP HOP right now. You digging? "mcafeetan no, it's lighting + a filter + exhaustion." I may or may not be just getting around to listening to Donuts. syrupf: yikes National Jogging Association of Thailand squishysar you should see a doctor to confirm. SITREP: I bought some socks. ammnontet thank you. tomorrow. I'm deep cleaning my room tonight. What a beautiful world! boatfactory I'm only responding to questions with polls from now on. "So if BMW asked if I wanted to hang out, I could RESPOND WITH A FUCKING POLL and you could decide my answer." "I just realized that with Twitter polls, how I answer someone's query can be decided by popular vote..." CoxworthIII why is this possible? Why did I do this? All my life I have wanted to be able to honk with my body... CoxworthIII CoxworthIII it's cold out here. ammnontet suika_system it will crash you. CoxworthIII what the fuck. tr0picthunder: Lol chancetherapper is sitting next to me at the airpo chancetherapper: This nigga just snuck a pic of me at the airport. His name is tr0picthunder and he's very excited. … My Benz friend is no longer a Benz friend... He traded his S-Class for a new 7-Series in Alpine White. ?????? CoxworthIII food. Look at this photograph of the sky. Everybody look away. "mcafeetan more like, open fire on anyone with food." ClickHole: Incredible. DinnerBoy mcafeetan GLUTEN GUARDS. mcafeetan private security? mcafeetan we have a lot in common. "poem_exe: stillness and solitude a hell yellow roses drop so cold" AutoExpress: Alfa Romeo's upcoming SUV set to arrive in 2016! Here's what we know so far: … "_rlane_: Out with the RS and AstonParrott this arvo. Unruly buggers, both of them. " "DavidNelsonNews: Facebook apologizes for banning man after learning his name really is ""Phuc Dat Bich"" https:/…" "classicdriver: Like a mini Bergmann Ferrari 375 MM? " I'm going to be sick. CBWoodard: Do automakers ever admit to making cars for insecure people? Feels like every press release calls it a car for confident (dy… "ammnontet: YEA, NICE " "At any given time, I'm one swipe away from an ETE to my house. Big guns. Thanks to my iPhone, I am Safe." " I'm sorry to hear that, James." " is this what it's like to be a big boy, James?" "animefricker: gender neutral term for your partner: - danger noodle" I wish I could hug Charles Lindbergh. "a_nice_frog you are always welcome, Sam. Good things happen when you speak." a_nice_frog yes! Yes yes yes! The Pitch notalekmichael I am alive. How are you? AsphaltApostle pitiful. CarPlay Diem ammnontet: mike jones (whom) "syrupf: ""Who is Mike jones?"" -Plato" When you marry a suspension bridge. Too many polls... Need more poll tools. Is there a limit to how many active polls I can have at any given time? This is never not going to be funny. There are remnants of the war against my hair all over my house. "This is about the fridge, Hillary. Stop changing the subject. (Vine by GabrielDreyfuss) " (Vine by nut) Nugget is the god damned future. No. : guccibraidz Cosmopolitan gertrude is my starbucks name Thank you so much. """My memoirs are like the anarchist cook book meets the Tom Ford Spring-Summer Lookbook""" Adele25 syrupf: now that i realize it the garbage truck has a scary fast robotic arm that lifts the cans syrupf: i wanna get grabbed by one EGG Tfw u marry a suspension bridge. Collin___P nah. I'm still laughing about this. kabeebus the wall of the Wine & Spirits section. Didn't penetrate or anything - it's brick - but it destroyed the front of the Jeep. DeletedWiki: Category: Guys who used to have long hair Someone just ran into the side of the grocery store. DeletedWiki: Death Jazz Piss Funk """Nothing is real."" - Honda" ciara_isobel thanks. ciara_isobel: how much drycast could a drycast drycast if a drycast could drycast drycast CoxworthIII: Watching star wars for the first time. Everyone calm down. pfizer hey. gaming gamingforgood gamingtuesday GamingLive Gamingnews gaming pewdiepie feliciaday "Drycast is LIVE with Adele25, ShadowOfADoubt, the LAAutoShow, samsunggear VR and more! " And JOIN US! Jez. Drycast episode 50 is going live in 3 minutes with good & fun stuff. PersonTheHumann thank you! PersonTheHumann no it's cool. Would you mind picking up a 24 pack of water from HyVee? I'll pay you back. PersonTheHumann right now. syrupf incredible. Freddie Gordy LIVE on Periscope: Rain + Ye Olde Upright My only party hype is exclusive to the Rolls-Royce party. "GettyImagesNews: The long and winding road up Liuba Mountain in Hanzhong, China " Immortality coupon. Grass roots lobotomy. DIY prosthetics and cheap DNA sequencing... What a wonderful time. Bookingson: Basketball Wives "mcafeetan I don't actually get cultural references like that, usually, so I'm very used to genuinely responding that way." mcafeetan I did this for 30 minutes on Periscope this morning it was ridiculous. mcafeetan please keep them coming! Does anybody have the time? mcafeetan just another Monday! DJ Nothing 2 weeks of yoga (Vine by evan_breen) party (Vine by evan_breen) mcafeetan I sleep under the fucking sun. ChristenGerhart: The universe's resolution limit—why we may never have a perfect view of distant galaxies The Ocarina of Time Variations loop EliminateAllTroubles followed you Bentley Motors Limited SavedYouAClick: "Put me in, coach. I can still save us, but I need to staNOW. " Elon. LIVE on Periscope: What time is it? ": josie & the pussycats is a wild ride, skewering consumerism like few other flicks ive seen tbh. just drowns u in it htt…" And they have every year for 15 years straight. "If y'all actually find Sandstorm that funny, go to the Memorial Day Airshow at KCOU - they loop it for the whole F/A-18 demo." OurEdisons I think you're the first person I've ever talked to who knows what JDrunk Q&A is. akiba_k3i: i like this picture of my car. "It’s amazing to visit this web page and reading the views of all friends about this paragraph, while I am also zealous of getting experience" Where are the random poll generators? mahoumahoumahou: duck pyramid "lamp_head we have many things in common, Lamp." akiba_k3i yup I actually just bought a 6S Plus specifically because they offer it in Rose Gold lol. I love it. akiba_k3i that was gonna be my original response but I exercised my restraint. akiba_k3i what about a white gold? akiba_k3i kinda... yzome I know exactly how you feel. I actually developed a tick from using the original ScreenFlow. Mine was blinking though. What to fuck. yzome only90skidsremember software spirit rituals. This is good. Atlas Shucked it's all that's left. SelfAwareROOMBA: some stains aren't really there LIVE on Periscope: Monday morning coffee! ClickHole: We Challenged This Man To Survive On Minimum Wage And He Immediately Got Hit By A Car … Look at this. Like...what the fuck happened? mcafeetan mihmnop I am so fucking glad there is someone else in the world that had this thought. mihmnop mcafeetan I'm not kidding. I knew how to use the cultural influence of the curly-haired quaint boy to my advantage. Yonder tree was literally de-leafed overnight. "mcafeetan it was absolutely terrible at first, but then Juno came out and quirks got really cool and it became charming." creaku: DJ Khaled's snapchat everybody Fun? PersonTheHumann yeah it's forreal. Live Rollergirl! I'm a Disco Hunk. ammnont_ebooks: music goal: get a good boy and love jesus Need to be in the Funk Place. How do I become friends with the funk people? Hell. Where is the funk. mcafeetan PersonTheHumann me & my boys have cleaner digestive systems than you did in the womb. "PersonTheHumann mcafeetan water (water) water (water) water (water)" "mcafeetan I can keep it down to twenty ounces, I guess..." mcafeetan I will be your accompanyman if you'd like! robotpup what an incredible image. JGRXXN: xX... Thank you God (Vine by cedrick66) Please get out of the way I just want some Ovaltine. VGAdvisor: SelfAwareROOMBA: what is content SelfAwareROOMBA: feelin jazzy SelfAwareROOMBA: restraint is frightening Silk ski mask. akiba_k3i: rose gold exhaust tips... "mcafeetan your poor, tortured unconscious mind." mcafeetan I am so sorry... That is the scariest dream account I've ever read. Things4WhitePpl: Adele "Things4WhitePpl: Tweeting ""Unbothered ??"" after sending 13 subtweets and a death threat" Can I order alcohol brought to my house. Zhi Zhu Xires2 Xires2 NO. It does not take much searching to find beauty in the world. Chrome has picked up some bad habits. Can someone email me some food please. ihaveswineflu never left. """She is the Sultan of Famous, and you crave glimpses of her face.""" """Here it is, the final nectar-sweet photo of the beautiful, sour angel named Jen Larry.""" HUNGRY FUN ClickHole: Here Are 7 Pics Of The Jen Larry Girl You Love! Have we gotten to the point where any soof genuine character acting is uncool? The End approaches. Things4WhitePpl: Calling someone boss or chief "ChappellTracker: Eyvind Earle's concept work for Lady and the Tramp is often overlooked. But, look how adorable! " akiba_k3i: remove 86 I'm not sure I really understand Master of None. Piss. """And now it's time for David Blue's weekly absurd word trash.""" Is there anywhere I can get paid for this? Day-to-day life consists of me vomiting entertaining - but meaningless - combinations of words and laughing to myself as everyone looks on. """Millennial honesty.""" I have a content. SUPERB "Dogknob1 if it is, I want to stay very far away." Dogknob1 CHRIST. What market could they possibly be trying to reach? Post-retro nihilist. What is an authoritarian neo-hippy? Do Germans ever tent? Dogknob1 (I was trying to figure out who'd actually spend money on this.) Dogknob1 authoritarian neo-hippy. Door-to-door Californians. because American car buyers are the most ignorant group in the world. CargrammerLA: Beautiful door panel on the mercedes c63AMG Coupe amg c63 MercedesBenz LAAutoShow cclass rauché "boatfactory Remington, Savage, Browning." "boatfactory Kill1, Kill2, and Kill3." akiba_k3i: AsphaltApostle Run. mcafeetan I'm glad you had fun. mcafeetan yelp. syrupf: napster demon Apparently the Westboro Baptist Church has opinions on musicianship now. I'LL BE SELLING NOISE/PIANOVIOLENCE TAPES OUT OF MY BACKPACK FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE I AM THE OFFSPRING OF THE INTERNET I AM YOUR CHILD TWITTER JMan_Rife: Saw someone moving into a dorm just now. It's 2am. triflingtimes Dry till I die. Live and die for the Dry. Dimplecore Photo: 1/10 copy of Hamura on cassette. Thnx burnt for dubbing. Unique artwork on each on. My urine featured... First copy of Hamura dubbed by PersonTheHumann. Other copies will be for sale soon. 10 in all. Unique hand-drawn afor every one. Photo: So much color. (Taken with instagram) Photo: Burbs 4 lyfe (Taken with instagram) GhettoGeek WHERE? Duck calls on cassette. Totally forgot that I repped Casper Meets Wendy on Hamura. CASH REGISTER SONAR """I'm a family man."" - While eating cardboard packaging." I KILLED JAZZ I KILLED HIP HOP Destroying the local music scene one shitty genre at a time. Memeviolence. Memecore. JMan_Rife: DepravedInfant Oh god no MEMESTEP Collin___P I'm not a big fan. I need a surface as stable as my 500 lb. cherrywood desk. " yeah I forgot about that. I need to get a Silver Cloud III so I can write to my estranged half-brother, Bernard on the go." AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I'm triggered now. Tfw when ivy_hollivana whaaaaaat the fuck. I'd really like some fold-down trays in my car so I can stop to write in quiet places. Guess I'm gonna have to buy a new Mulsanne Speed. idiot_joke_teen thanks. Ferris. nutsicle it's still going but it's been good! I have survived so far. How was yours? Toss me an interaction. Astonishing. PersonTheHumann cool$$$$ Grumpy Boy Newsletter Blaspheme game heavy. PersonTheHumann I can do Tuesday or Thursday night if you want to yell at the grumpy boy in person. please keep us updated. : Horrible DancesWithTamis: My man here ls charming the pants off of TSA squishysar thank you. It was doomed from the stathough. I'll give you more opportunities to yell at the grumpy boy in the future. : We looking inspirational tonight Damn. LIVE on Periscope: Yell at the grumpy boy syrupf: I've beaten you at your own game. relatable ComedyVine "mcafeetan it plays as I float around in my Jaguar, awaiting The End." "BMWMotorsport: “Protect me from what I want” declared Jenny Holzer, talking about the BMW V12 LMR acar. Which BMW do you want? https…" mcafeetan I listen to it every day and love to be punished so just deflect any negative attention this way. Nobody's willing to move my XJR for me because they know they may never leave it once they've entered. CarDealerEd: 'Freelancer' offering to write copy for free if I let him have a long termer. Seriously what's this game come to? … akiba_k3i bitter and ironic post-colonial homebodyness. All the reasons people claim to hate British culture are why I adore it. clickbait_bot: 9 Million-Year Old Life Hacks who Are Secretly Minions! Wow. clickbait_bot: Amazing. The Feminist Sings About Chris Evans. WOW! "You know, Benedict Cumberbatch and Jeremy Clarkson look and act VERY similarly how did I not notice this before." EMAIL My gargantuan howling celestial pal. jesstalwar: get you someone that treats you like DJ Khaled treats his plants ammnontet I'd visit and donate! "I gotta be *that* guy for a sec, sorry. " squishysar K I L L Scrubble Lacockaruckus Kneeville. "*muffled police sirens* ""Will we be stopping for this one, sir?"" ""No, Neville.""" Collin___P I am a density glutton. ClickHole: 10 Things Captains Going Down With The Ship Are Tired Of Hearing "a_nice_frog: Hello, hello " "ammnont_ebooks: ammnontet i, the white male, have singlehandedly ended racism by talking about it online to at least one thousand peop…" Taurus jousting. BMW: Caution: Artist at work. MT PetroliciousCo This BMW 2002 was built to carve corners. "It's not really making sense, though. " My hair is fuckin soft as shit right now. mihmnop terrible nightmare. Existence game on point rn I'm the President of the United States. : Polls are better now " daaaang. It'd probably be best to upload it to YouTube and send me the link, then." "I'm the new Gallup, you filth." ummmm. Depends on the size of the video. What ???????? FUCK. "classicdriver: The patina on this Ferrari 500 Mondial had our photographer smitten… rmsothebys …" "fanfiction_txt: Obama chuckled. ""You mean the Chaos Emeralds?""" I'm not a clean being today. LAAutoShow: Want to get in to the hyundai Owner's Lounge? Show keys/insurance/registration card their display! LAAutoShow … "AsphaltApostle the same reasons we have terrible taste in most things, shunt." Why do Americans have such terrible taste in wine. I guess it's time for me to die. well shit. probably. I don't think that's really a very unique quality. "poem_exe: cool breeze clinging to dry grasses winter copse empty" syrupf I hope so. This is what I listen to when I need to calm down. syrupf is there anything I can do? what is a zoolander syrupf is everything ok? I'm scared. I don't have enough to clean my bathroom. Please send chardonnay. "jaguarcarclub: A lovely setting for Oliver Thornber's 1956 MK1 2.4, a great image! fueledfortnight " nooooooo Spanish makes me tired. " sorry, I've just exhausted all my Spanish." casa casa. "egg? cardigan " """Oscillation on the pavement always indicates a love affair.""" CoxworthIII did you search this Tweet out just to appear clever? "Merry marry me, Mary." claiming to be God is one of my favorite pastimes. When the family asks you to lead the Thanksgiving dinner prayer because they forgot about your extreme blas... Z-Ro has arrived. squishysar noooooo you're better than this. verge: Vine has launched an Apple Watch app """Kyle Busch is evolving.""" Please send me to hell. AWJayRamey: BREAKING: Lada 124 Spider to debut at DetroitAutoShow betterlatethannever ClickHole: The Kindest Man Alive: Jon Hamm Made Crepes For A Beached Whale TamerlaneBlog: $25k E500 for sale. I just fought my hair and lost. Fuck. thanks. """The war is over."" " emgreerie: MOBY. Dollar shave club beverage. syrupf: when there's nothing out there "theseoldcars: Still ferociously quick and very tractable. New interior is a vast improvement over the previous generation, too. https:/…" Edith I am Black Friday. Shagging Hug Shirley Helms I need 2 leave this place. "ammnontet ivy_hollivana if I could feel things, I would be offended rn." Sentreh I left this playing and it's really adding to the film. Sentreh I'm trying. ivy_hollivana wait...you can't say that. Sentreh does that number have significance? NISMO leather daddy. You can touch my leather but only if you wash your hands first. ammnontet I'm going to end your life with a gun. I'm about to get popcorn junk on my face. Then...I will be a more eligible prospect. ammnontet you're going down. "I don't remember why ""Ghana Fashion Week"" is written on my whiteboard." lamp_head sounds more interesting than I anticipated. "I have the softest hair in this fucking town right now and if you've got something to say otherwise, I'd suggest you say it to my face." Is Will going to die. squishysar I hope Will is ok. Remember them. Cycles of punishment. Fuck I'm About To Fall Asleep To Good Will Hunting 12News: :/ Collin___P lamp_head I know what it means to be oppressed now. I'm not white anymore. I can't believe my third eye is open now. Do not accuse anyone of being Ronald Jenkees. oblongoto I want to marry her. oblongoto you can't. I am absolutely NOT in love with Gute from Vine. "akiba_k3i absolutely not! No! Nothing of the sort! You know me too well." SmokeTricks Just saw a guy NOT open the car door for his mom. This generation SMH (Vine by Lil Gute) Baaaaad bitch (Vine by Lil Gute) David Blue is... Mishap. CoxworthIII: AsphaltApostle Your hair alone should be a new meme. wordnuvola wordcloud "cher: I was looking at tweets & saw that i really husomeones feelings ! Im sorry. It was light blue background with white egg shape…" "akiba_k3i tastefully fast-looking, I think. Wing, especially." what is that thing? ammnontet: h "akiba_k3i they're acceptable. I have a bias toward the stock look, ya know." oliveri_pablo: PrestigeDiesels 11_Porsche Eyewantstyle LeahRebeccaUK simonshieldcars Porsche 911 GT3 RS ultravioleta pùrpura. http… I'm a Vine bug boy now. What is the vine bug. Xires2 h I just laughed like a human being. Sentreh ivy_hollivana ammnontet you've already figured me out. Huge Clanking Where the snakepanda emoji "I'm excited, of course, but I know the rational response is probably terror. " you deceitful heathen! squishysar an impoverished alcoholic? I'm out of food & money until Friday so I'm havin scotch for dinner. "autocar: Our verdict is in on the dual-clutch automatic Suzuki SX4 S-Cross, read our full review: …" May you give the biggest Thank. Happy American Pillage Day! "Someone very sincerely wished me ""happy Halloween"" today." squishysar ah. Well thank you for you compliments. They justify the war. squishysar your heais in your ass? squishysar it's a pain in the ass. "If I sound mad, it's not you; I am yelling at my hair." Thanksgiving is to celebrate our successful colonialism and Christmas is to celebrate our wealth & excess. "ammnontet really appreciate it, man!" ammnontet thanks! ammnontet: AsphaltApostle Thanks! Glad I'm finally going to be thanked tomorrow. ammnontet CoxworthIII ammnontet: a_nice_frog ?? a_nice_frog this is something I'd love to discuss on Drycast. ivy_hollivana shhhhhh oblongoto that sounds weird. Truck Porn HammerFist3: flex Cat_ebooks: Open your mind to giving me money butterball: .Drake We're still waiting for your call at 1-800-Butterball HotlineBling TalkLineBling U L T I M A T E T H A N K I can't believe I'm alive. Sorry it took me so long. You can hit me if you want. Drycast episode 49 with ivy_hollivana ciara_isobel and is now available! : "tfnames: What's Better than This, Just Cars Being Dudes" CoxworthIII you're damn right. $$$$ thanksgiving (Vine by croissantgurl) I love my Jaguar. squishysar squishysar kale will always be funny. Occasional flex is important for health of the soul. squishysar OH MY GOD. Essential empty parking garage flex. squishysar I know you were behind all those hearts. Thank you. ?? Thanks for all the hearts! LIVE on Periscope: Just practicing - expect nothing "poem_exe: sunrise of the crickets within me" JaguarUSA: Always room for a new tradition. XE HappyThanksgiving julkinen: This '88 Starion looks so good on Seinfeld's home street. torquespeak: There are some fantastic covers in Autocar's back catalogue. But every once in a while... disaster Thirty percent.... Hooooollly fuck. Actually upsetting. you're better than them. I'm thankful for nuclear sea mines. OH MY GOD. "USMC: We're thankful for overwhelming firepower. What are you thankful for? Happy Thanksgiving, Marines. " Email glutton. MR_AndrewBrady: In London to see the final streetcar product and celebrate 10 years of Hyundai UK. MercedesBenz: Performance of a sports car & packed with technology – the R129 took the SL out of the 70s and into the future. https:/… stevenewing: Thankful for 58-degree convertible weather in Detroit on November 26. jriswick: DogThanking Maggie for keeping us all safe from bands of passing marauders Purina ammnontet: im thankful to my enemy's and the people who want me dead and hired hitmen from the deep web. im thankful for deep web hitmen O fuck. Google is a silly word. ammnontet DarkXzeon Xires2 YouTube bijoubay I AM THANKFUL FOR GOOGLE. google CoxworthIII: "Not real porn, just nice trucks." ru2213y How soon do you want it? Blasting Chest Flattener in public and getting concerned looks. Photo: Photo: Thoughts from everywhere (Taken with instagram) Photo: Tapes in my backpack (Taken with instagram) Photo: Taken with instagram WORD MUTILATION I live for REM rebound dreams. Human life is cheap. Wheat Inflation I miss abusing Adderall and sleeping 3 hours a night. Euphoria was much more common. "6 million ways to Maab, choose one." Ruskichan is new reddit. Lardlife 2012 His gums a mute and bleeding mess of teeth. Staying up hand-drawing the afor every copy of Hamura because I'M FUCKING DEDICATED TO ALL MY FANS good person PersonTheHumann: nothing faggier than dubbing drywall tapes and watching Milky Holmes "A sense of self-worth is your enemy, and the enemy of all humanity." Jug Full of Narcolepsy Adventures in Sleep Deprivation GhettoGeek No. GhettoGeek I would RETWEET that if I COULD. badbadnotgood: BBNG2 TOMORROW Remember that time I lost consciousness while playing my upright and caught the result on tape. I reaaaaallly hate beer drunk. Scotch is saving me rn but I'm almost out. Please send 18 year scotch. thewaybot: I like it when you use feminine pronouns so feel free to continue. mcafeetan sandblast them nostrils. "Lowpolybot: imgblur Your picture is ready: minimal flat noedges shuffle " A Fuckin Lump "ihadtopee: PINK FRIDAY SALE: Save Big, Shop Feminist - *Save 20% on your entire purchase today at the * [... " How the fuck did pie crust get on my Maddens. Live stream My Fucking Death. "syrupf: hello hello tell yourself tell your friends there are more options now please take a look!! " YtThumbnails: I'm gonna be fat. I have been drinking for 8 hours straight. tpnug cool Nug. noantica: ???????? syrupf Rolls-Royce Silver Cloud III akiba_k3i: why didn't things turn out like this ivy_hollivana I'm so glad this is how you see me. I'm a lump. ivy_hollivana aaaaaaaaaa!!!!! ?????? ihaveswineflu I'd pay big bux to get Soviet Flu on the air. You NEED to watch the Humans Fly: Dubai snapchat story RIGHT NOW. Bout to go Greenwich Mean Time on these hoes. Ayn Rand Black Friday Blowout! wordnuvola wordcloud virgyvirgil wordnuvola: AsphaltApostle here's your word cloud B^D "squishysar I'd have to be ridin slow & low, though." "DeepForger: AsphaltApostle Here’s the breakdown of your request, with style from Charles Demuth. NeuralADeepStyle …" DeepForger: AsphaltApostle A DeepForgery avec techniques by Charles Demuth at around 1928; could auction above 95¢… … DeepForger portrait TheOnion: 42 Million Dead In Bloodiest Black Friday Weekend On Record I'll be ok if they just let me in. Please make me clean. I want to go to Germany so they can give me a bath. mcafeetan dads only club. human makers ONLY. mcafeetan what the fucking is this. Santa is going to bring me a Silver Cloud III or I'm going to kill his children in front of him. OH fuck. OurEdisons I am not a penis. I am a human being with a penis. Why is there hair on. My face This is a photograph of my penis. Here it is; my first dick pic. ghost_things: ghost probation terry.mp4 "blank_was_blank: Her gym was three-inning, like chainlike homosexuals" "ammnont_ebooks: ammnontet, the edgy lyrics out of my ass and self-esteem allow me to get wildly obese and not care." "Dogknob1 (also, no thanks.)" Dogknob1 thank you. I needed to know so I could point out how stupid it is. "When I say ""sorry, I must retreat to my editing hell"" my family knows exactly what I mean." LIVE on Periscope: Just practicing - expect nothing Please help Z-Ro navigate his home. CyberEveryword: ??????????? PersonTheHumann Gabby's thoughts on Hardbass. " I died, didn't I?" Hardbass. PersonTheHumann I've lost my reason to continue. Dogknob1 what's this called? Drycast is LIVE with ammnontet's new album! PersonTheHumann you can if you want but I still need to get notes together. TF2Torrent hello. GET IN THE PANIC ROOM. TF2Torrent sounds like a threat. "Drycast is going LIVE in 90 minutes with scary AI, Google activities, private air forces, and more! Podcast " Sexual orientation: Bentley And getting fat. I am older than the trees. CoxworthIII: Funny boys. AsphaltApostle I have a joke. 0kbps this is the cutest thing holy crap. 0kbps: i put up christmas lights and my dog was rly confused about how i got on the roof verge: See the invisible wireless signals around you with this augmented reality app syrupf GARY JUICY "alanresnicks: I love that little ""boing"" sound my body keeps making! It's funny & fun!" ihaveswineflu: Fav a tweet and Tom's will give a Fav to a user in need YtThumbnails: The ultimate hangover remedy is death. .thelittleidiot Oh l.a... (Vine by thelittleidiot) MOBY mcafeetan I bench 3 but I'm hoping to be able to heft 4 by the end of next year! mcafeetan we're big boys. Drycast episode 50 was very good & fun. Mike. mcafeetan good shirt. I've realized that puns are essential to success on this app. "I think this is technically vandalism, but at least I'll never forget. " "LIVE on Periscope: OPINION: Bentley Social Justice / Why John Lennon's ""Imagine"" is shit " I've just communed with the lord. SmallBizSaturday SmallBizSat cuckold "Yes, I'm aware of how ridiculous this is. Answer the goddamned poll." POLL: I would pay David Blue to spend a day with me and behave in an entertaining manner and/or provide advice. Dee and Dee is that a movie. squishysar if I wasn't in massive debt I'd come down there right now. "squishysar I mean, if you like DJ Screw, slab culture and Bentleys...I can't ask for much more." "adrianfer15 please... No. Is that me? Good God... Tell me that's not me, Canti." squishysar I'm heartbroken now. squishysar can you be the earner instead? I really like sitting & silk and would rather not do too much. "squishysar unfortunately, I do not have Notch money, but I appreciate your offer." "CoxworthIII has 2 days and 19,000 words left for NaNoWriMo and he needs your encouragement! He is a sad man and needs to be bothered!" remember how I said Avalon owners are a very specific type of human being but couldn't define it? You just have; SHRIMP CURRY. "squishysar I've been doing this a lot lately. Unfortunately, wine just makes me really sleepy." DjMilfMagnet: When your dentist adds you on snapchat squishysar are you a rabbit? "If I had notch money, I'd have a huge garage with heated marble and a cozy living area so I could spend time with my Bentley babies." "Notch is lonely, which is stupid. Imagine how many Bentleys he could buy." Xires2 you've done it wrong. "oblongoto no, thank YOU! Jazz nerds are always looking for someone who'll listen to our pretentious rambling." "oblongoto if you ever want jazz, you can always come to me. I am ancient and knowledgeable in old man things. " DrPhil: This ain’t my first rodeo. Dead troubled German composer squad. Schumann is fuckin squad. MoonReplica you too! Pee well! MoonReplica I don't know. This is a whole new world for me. MoonReplica thanks for listening! :) I whistle this in the gas station a lot. The first girl that recognizes it will have my hand in marriage. I am 86 years old. I know what hell smells like. oblongoto do you like stuff like this? Incredible. "Forgot about sexuality for awhile, sorry." Xires2 hey. : AsphaltApostle nonsensical water week pissboot who is this young man. "creaku hey, Hyundai." Bet you thought I wouldn't deliver. Sentreh and don't you DARE reference the book; it is my only trigger. Sentreh no leather? No wood? No David Blue. Who up click clank. "clean fast stupid" I've really been slacking on my magazine reading lately... I guess I need the new Mulsanne Speed and its rear fold-down trays. please come here as soon as possible. I want to die from your curls. I'm in crisis rn. Curls got me fucked up. My beautiful sanctuary. My loyal friend. I love my car. LIVE on Periscope: Practicing - expect nothing And THIS is art. This is pornography. """You can make very scary choices in the backseat.""" """The seven.""" XCAR is damned good. MoonReplica it takes awhile to become accustomed to properly addressing The Tree. MoonReplica I was referring to lol. He has an E36 M3. He is also the BMW Holy Tree. In high school I used to go 3 nights without sleep and then listen to Vienna in class. I left Earth. "MoonReplica nice! I can't really compete with that. BMW can though, certainly." I am the human embodiment of sleep. "In high school, I convinced everyone to listen to my records for once, and they all fell asleep." "I also know every moment of Vienna and Köln by heart. Can't play it, of course, but I know what's coming." "It's literally all I have on vinyl...every time I go to a record store, I just buy them out of Jarrett." I have all the major Jarrett improvs on vinyl. oblongoto it's perfect for that! oblongoto and you should listen to this if you want to hear more experimental stuff. And that's the end for now. oblongoto I understand. This is my favorite recording of all time. (It'll probably get taken down soon.) Hair reaching peak softness. Locals can stop by to touch it for $45 if you wash your hands immediately beforehand. 3 officialjaden: Why Is It Always 3 WHY IS IT ALWAYS 3!!!!! A bit heavy. More Jaden. I'm back at it. "mcafeetan I wish I could do impressions, but I can only do the trailer voice + NASCAR commentator." robotpup I knew it. mcafeetan how's this? MAXIMUM QUIRK ihaveswineflu edible drones. ihaveswineflu: 2016 they r going to make way too many things be edible Melvin Peep that scowl. just come to MU for journalism and stay with me in my cozy leather/wood fortress. I will protect your curls. "Just listen to the whole fucking thing, you shits. " Choosing one track from this album to share was a real challenge. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa "I hope a bunch of magazine editors see this. Hello! I'm more talented than your whole staff and I'm 7% Dad. HML" 100% curls. " I suppose I could creep on your curls on the move, then. Wouldn't be safe if I did that behind the wheel." ivy_hollivana cuckold rigger daddy I'm very curious as to what you think. brands marketing auto industry carpoll business advertising industrypoll PersonTheHumann Collin___P and their advertising is still VERY insistent that they're the villain's choice. "PersonTheHumann Collin___P I agree; they're just not mean anymore, but I still hear a lot of admiration for the brand from commoners." "Poll: In general, the Bentley marque is..." "Collin___P this is correct for the entire history of the XJ, though." "Collin___P the Mk. II was a favorite for criminals, then the E-Type was THE coolest car in the world for like 2 decades." "Collin___P nope. Only since the mid-70s. And really, only the base saloons since then." "Poll: In general, the Jaguar marque is..." PersonTheHumann ok cool. I have off work so I should be alive + tolerable by 7PM or so. "There's been some confusion surrounding this so let me set things straight: While I prefer David Blue, my legal name is actually Panic Room." PersonTheHumann I kinda need to catch up on some petty chores. What about tomorrow? AlecBaldwin do you smoke? Brent's Avalon Saga PersonTheHumann this is the funniest thing I have seen in a long time. "a_nice_frog: my look right now is really ""yoga goth""" JenkinsComp454: AutoBant This. SundayScenario peteraylward: AutoBant SundayScenario 2nd E9 CSL post of the night ickx bell photography bmw "J4vv4D: ""We have a problem."" ""Remember, there are no such things as problems, only opportunities."" ""Well then, we have a DDoS opportuni…" carloslago: My favorite paabout a crowded trader joe's is the collective sense of exasperated frustration "I left my handheld web interface at home, sorry." Can't sleep cuz the user experience 2 pleasant. Love my Sunday morning news! Have you ever thought about how astonishing the Honda Accord's model name is? "I've given it some thought and I think it's genuine. My first life hack! Of course, I've begun preparations accordingly." oh dear...ohhhhh dear. Toyota disobedience. Does my argument regarding appropriate disobedience of stoplights constitute a real life hack? "RapGameShinji: please friends, join me in crowdfunding a mission to 3dprint AsphaltApostle 's glasses" LIVE on Periscope: Analog vape tricks Vape4Christ Who's ready for some sick VapeTricks?!!!! Peep my Periscope! squishysar I agree with everything this young man had to say. syrupf ...he's been on every episode so far dude. Probably gonna do a Periscope of analog vape tricks in about 45 minutes. I communed with the Holy Spirit. It vapes. "syrupf he says ""Â??????????Ñ????????????????""" Took a bunch of adderall - now having a chat with the lord. ric_cola I actually meant to ask why the majority do not use lists. I guess my next question at this point would be...why? GasStationMemes: There's no harm in buying one more pack of cigarettes. "CalgaryPorsche: Good chilly morning to you! A little ski jumping anyone? Porsche 356 tbt blackandwhite " AlexRoy144: I'm just realizing I shouldn't have sold my 1988 E24 M6. "ivy_hollivana ya know, I was joking, but I'd actually love to know how the bdsm community feels about Bentley." "I'd do one for Rolls-Royce, but I don't think there's any uncertainty regarding its position these days." "Thanks for responding to my polls, by the way. I know it isn't much effort, but I do very much enjoy indulging my curiosity." "Poll: You use Twitter lists..." Yeeeeeess. Superb choice. DRUMWOLF IM YOUR BIGGEST FAN SPIT IN MY MOUTH Transistor was fucking awesome. The Spit too. Photo: DUCKFACE ATTRACTIVE (Taken with instagram) One the Killer. ru2213y Alright. Will do. Thanks. ru2213y Just today. I didn't know you recommended me. Thanks brosef! The day I kill myself will be the first day of my life as an honest man. Got an interview at HyVee tomorrow. Yesssss. One more step to becoming a slave to capitalism. Can't let the pigs catch me with a trunk full of raw milk. There's no room for apologies when you're surrounded by deception. Need to stagrowing plants in my backpack. Photo: Vegetableviolence (Taken with instagram) Vegetableviolence. One of my customers urinated on the tape I sold him. And he didn't pay. "Of course, I don't have the constitutional right to be FUCKING MISERABLE." Fucking loving BBNG2 badbadnotgood CapnHellaSwagg: DepravedInfant: on History Channel the Top Gear is worst cars ever. The Aztek and Yugo. I'M ADDICTED TO SLEEP DEPRIVATION STOP COMPROMISING STOP SETTLING YOU CONTENT IGNORANT FUCKERS "Oh look, everybody else is happy. WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU BOY" "Oh, you don't think like everyone else? Here, have some anti-depressants." "Oh you don't have the energy to be productive in society? Ok, have some amphetamines." YomanFezWasup death. Keep it goin! pixts: frida gustavsson at prabal gurung "A rare glimpse of neo-humanity. (In other words, I have a gigantic crush on Nugget.) " Carpervert: What is Monday without a little Rover-based philosophy? I'm sure sniffpetrol and Mr Wordsworth would agree. … ciara_isobel Ultimate Cool Mom Xires2 sweet! Yeah I have way too much to say about racing sims and it's very rare that my peers want to hear it. "NissanID: NISSAN Lovers, rencanakanlah tujuan Anda dan berusahalah untuk mewujudkannya. yang setuju. " IanCallum: A drive home from Edinburgh via my favourite road. The A701. Bit slippy today but still beautiful. Xires2 boy I've spent more time in Gran Turismo 2 than you've spent breathing. I really need to go to an F1 race. ALERT: F1 ABU DHABI SNAPCHAT STORY lamp_head I'd really appreciate it! I can reward you with 500 shares of Drywall Media stock! Would anyone be willing to whip up a banner photo for the Year of Drycast celebration? CoxworthIII yeeesss. Very good. Remember: you can always call on me for suggestions if you get stuck. "squishysar but even taking that into consideration, you're still the most loyal by a juicy gap." "squishysar Z-Ro and Lil' O are LITERALLY my fathers, and you've found them in a video together. I cherish this gift." "Collin___P Xires2 I was more complimented by this than a reasonable individual should be, I think." virgyvirgil: AsphaltApostle "squishysar I understand. Keep in mind, though, that Honda hasn't really been itself for 10 years, and will likely never be again." squishysar bruuuuhh. I'm just happy anyone is willing to sit through any of my ramblings at all. Guilt is most definitely unnecessary. "You've lost the battle for an extraordinary life, and have finished preparations for a future under the diligent occupancy of mediocrity." It represents your new treaty with existence... "You're wrong, but thank you!" CoxworthIII passion is essential to qualify storytelling! No! Don't allow it to be a tie! Please! We in the club like Kiwanis. My uvula is behaving like a fucking idiot right now. Hotline bling got me like DanceLikeDrake Hotlinebling Drake (Vine by Gump_boy) "capotej: a typo in a google search led me to find ""air traffic control memes"" " conner_omalley: There is a new Star Wars movie coming out syrupf: i cant believe im gonna be on a podcast with god CoxworthIII: AsphaltApostle syrupf Studio Eat 5ever! syrupf as soon as I arrive. "CoxworthIII good. Continue. Not with the thankless promotion, though." LIVE on Periscope: Practicing - expect nothing Please send scotch. THRILLING BULGARIA Auto_Attic: ModifiedMonday BMW2002 JeremyClarkson which one is the broken man? Don't be afraid to ask for help. "PersonTheHumann Toyota Avalon ""Most Demoralizing"" Calendar 2016" """Dick is the devil.""" "YomanFezWasup that, I cannot do. I am a litterer, even in death." Probably more relevant than most of the words you've read on self-driving cars of late. YomanFezWasup that's how I was raised. YES PLEASE Toyota Avalon review highlights ammnontet total outfit cost = <$50 if you wanted to know. HML for value fashion tips. I'm afraid of myself and about to review the Toyota Avalon. RapGameShinji: AsphaltApostle every office comedy employee in one person ammnontet: AsphaltApostle out here flailin around in a $5000 armani suit u bout to get spit all on that collar goddamn "nutsicle I am being genuine, trust me. Thank you." "CoxworthIII ammnontet I am proud of you, Terry. Congratulations." nutsicle thank you. "nutsicle my God, what a perfect compliment. I'm not just saying that, either. It's very rare that people speak to me in my language." nutsicle: AsphaltApostle I love your elegance Officially ready for my Bentley princess. ihaveswineflu Uvulitis in a hipster bakery bar. CoxworthIII wait what. "For whatever reason, boundless love for the sound pianos make was built into me. It never gets old." Thank your God for jazz. comedone_extra perfect! """Alive"" is even better." "While I'm intoxicated, let me just say that ""classy"" is an insult, not a compliment. ""Dapper"" is better, but still gross. Try sophisticated." comedone_extra I like the loud noise. My body gyrates to the loud noise. "The older I get, the more I'm distracted by curly hair." I do not understand the nofun jazz snob. Especially when the musicians are having fun. nutsicle you're allergic to existence. Brent and I were joking about Giant Steps and guess what the FIRST FUCKING CHAWAS. To Let I'm still the President of Butt. Everybody loves David Blue. mushbuh: any car is a hearse if you try squishysar aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyy Good morning. "colesprouse: You thought this puberty was good, wait until you see me after my ~second puberty~" dog_rates: Interesting dog here. Very large. Purple. Manifests rainbows. Perfect teeth. No ears. Surprisingly knowledgable 6/10 https:/… RossalynWarren: Gillian Anderson signed that viral tweet about her being fed up listening to men. I fell off the Earth. Rope Bunny Mayonnaise boys. I have flossed so much on Luna that big ole rock has got to want to spoon me so bad. Sorry mom I had 2 flex on these basics (empty streets.) 1620 token Ocular correction delete. Meet me on Fondren & Main "Grabbin grain In the turning lane and I gotta maintain (cuz the law's behind me) I've tried to leave the game I know I need to change" "RapGameShinji: I hate white kids who listen to hiphop but hate the culture. Everyone's welcome but we're guests, take your shoes off be…" "RapGameShinji probably gonna release it separately, but it's really fucking entertaining." "Officially living the Jaguar lifestyle. That said, I need a connect for cocaine." Desperately searching for fulfillment in the Toyota Avalon Lily is a cute name. "I'm running for president. My platform: everyone should own a gun, and shoot that gun at all times. Always shooting." sweetgirlsar got 2 shoot gun. "Remember: if everyone were to be killed by gun violence, gun violence would be over." Remember when I had bomb-ass nail game for a sec. : Sometimes you just gotta stand up and say hey there's crumbs all over my shiI should brush them off Xires2 I'm going to cry. ivy_hollivana AuditTheMedia this is one of the more practical / unobtrusive uses of such a device. It's time to save your magazine - hire David Blue. NELLY a ?? Collin___P mhhmm pissboot that came out of somebody's butt. I died. LIVE on Periscope: Practicing - expect nothing "evomagazine: evo 217 is on sale now and let us tell you, it's a cracker. We run through its contents here https…" Tato1979: Wishing all a terrific TurboTuesday! Lotus Esprit V8 PrestigeDiesels CivicSi1992 simonshieldcars LeahRebeccaUK … It's time to take a stand. "If I ever stareferring to the days of the week as objects of more meaning than they actually posses, please put me out of my misery." "SHAQ: IF u r readin this, u shud b ashamed ov yurself, u shud b sleep,go 2 bed i say" "MoonReplica of course! Thanks, guys!" "MoonReplica I understand. That would be my preference, as well." Collin___P "Poll: Preferred way to die?" "What do you think of the E30 M3 in ""Sterling Silver Metallic?"" (via ClassicCars_Mag) " """Ok Google, contact Anonymous.""" """Hey Siri, send a $20 donation to info wars.""" "poem_exe: a faint yellow rose over the moonlit slope this passing winter moon" "poem_exe: night traffic against a pink sky in darkness lingering" you may want to wipe your lens off. Sentreh true. Especially if they're Indulgence Day cards (what Christmas actually is.) Sentreh not really...I'm sorry. I despise holidays. AsphaltApostle foodist trash. Planned Pasta " ciara_isobel I agree. This is what first popped into my head, though. (I love old XJs) " ciara_isobel that depends on a lot of stuff - you probably don't want to open up that conversation. I could write a book. ciara_isobel the list of reasons for Cat and I to get married continues to grow. ciara_isobel I really wanna be paof this family so that I can capture it all on video. "kabeebus phosho! Gonna be ~ 8PM CST. If you've got time, can you try to compile some of your favorite moments on Drycast?" kabeebus *somber Taps begins to play* kabeebus: Every time i think of Saab I say Sierra Alpha Alpha Bravo in my head and I get chills kabeebus you can be my VP. When is the email holiday. ClickHole: I Was Never Able To Accept My Son’s Autism Until I Monetized It Through Blogging … "KOCOJessica: Top 10 baby girl names - 2015 via BabyCenter: 1. Sophia 2. Emma 3. Olivia 4. Ava 5. Mia 6. Isabella 7. Zoe 8. Lily 9. Emil…" LIVE on Periscope: Living with an aging Jaguar XJR "Wow! Thanks everybody. Death is a popular subject, apparently. Keep it goin!" I have a dusty booty. In a few minutes I'm gonna do a Scope about what's it's been like living with my XJR for nearly 2 years. This is very funny to me and I'm not entirely sure why. .CoxworthIII adrianfer15 cool. Fall Off Boy "Jesus may have saved you from your sins, but the Earth's magnetic field saves you from certain annihilation every day." "So far, most have made the right choice." Candy Land speed run. "A spin on the popular ""she succ me"" joke." She validated me. "Monument Valley is free now, and I know it's supposed to be really important and all that but..." Ripple_Frog: the pissboot same. "pissboot I mean... I should've seen it coming. I'm not good with puns, though." "Sexual fantasy: briefly blow raspberries, giggle accordingly, then sleep for 14 hours." pissboot fuck. Blowing raspberries without consent. a_nice_frog b/c you can make silly noises by blowing on them. "oblongoto it can basically induce temporary schizophrenia, so I'm sure it'd be an interesting experience, at least." oblongoto I respect your courage...but have you ever looked up what adderall does to you in extremely high doses? It's not pleasant. You guys are alright. bodybuildinga7: ? Volleyball sweetgirlsar I shall. :) "sweetgirlsar I did not, unfortunately. I intentionally face the screen away so I don't get distracted. I appreciate the sentiment, though." "koruemporium unfortunately, my ego got too big and floated away. They say it's past Pluto now." "parsfarce: me: need to work on ya fung SHUAYYYY AYYYYYEEE- client: stop that at once me: EEEEEEEEE [me as an interior designer]" koruemporium this is my favorite collection of words I've ever read. Thank you. Tryna get in on this meme page. Thecarsguy andrewtotton harrismonkey let us all observe a moment of silence for our fallen comrade. Jim_Holder: BREAKING - Jaguar LandRover could buy Silverstone Crawl chrome. Metrophobia. HOLY. "Just Fuck me Heck, fam." When school is beginning to irritate you just a bit. travisjdahnke GOOD! This son of a bitch deleted all my PDFs!!!! travisjdahnke cool. "Damn, we're us." Eh. LIVE on Periscope: Just practicing - expect nothing "PersonTheHumann sorry I'm just ?????? having realized I only have one day, basically." null_shithead I'm not sure what any of this means. PersonTheHumann ummmm. Would you mind if we just wait until Friday & Drycast? I'm probably gonna have a lot of preparation to do. : Winter Wear 2015/16: Bun Beanies™ kikkujo yup. PersonTheHumann holy shit it's a Drycast conspiracy. ???????? Bird Chest YoungBull TheRealBird Atown0705 (Vine by Luv_Da_Hustle) nutsicle ciara_isobel absolutely no idea. ciara_isobel you can't scare me away; I have 4 sisters. " ciara_isobel get drunk on the plane on your way here, then hit me in the face." ciara_isobel wooow. I can't believe the domestic abuse has already started. officialjaden koruemporium I scared away good ole georgino. " ciara_isobel stylistically, this was not a high point." I still feel this way. Reminder: ciara_isobel impossible. ciara_isobel this is so cute holy FUCK. ciara_isobel: My day 1 nigha ciara_isobel: Yingyang twins understood consent why can't yall? You can never have too much silk-lined clothing. clickbait_bot: The Young Chef Works With Unbelievable Man. clickbait_bot: A Boy Hates Dentist. clickbait_bot: 21 Dentists who Could Be Twins! Breathtaking. clickbait_bot: Meet The Boy Who Loves Life Hacks... clickbait_bot: Life Hack Likes Chris Evans! Win! ihaveswineflu: I go to school here robotpup South Korea. YES. Wow. Superb. I am a Master of the English language. You're already top of the class! (I did it!) Faith of the Heais stuck in my head. I was gonna come up with a more clever response but it's gonna take a bit. ivy_hollivana Fjajvjamdjrjcjems d I'm not either. I'm ready. our marriage is going extremely well. ?? "If you can say ""anywho,"" why can't I use ""anywhen?"" Or ""anywhat?""" ?? : The way most basic girls pose together from the hip makes them look like long haired crop top wearing hydras "Ok everybody pause... All of Bach's cello suites...ON THE BARI SAX." SaraJBenincasa neilhimself I want to be able to own an active Peacekeeper ICBM in my yard for home defense/tasteful decor. SaraJBenincasa neilhimself too much work. When the team needs to step it up a bit. "NYTArchives: A 1,000 volt electric charge replaces the need to eat food on this day in 1912. …" My hair won't shut the fuck up. Boiler explosion Twitter. Duncan_Gates: You know what looks utterly bizarre? Steam engines after boiler explosions. "I could say I stayed home from school because Jesus died today, but I'd be lying." What possible (rational) motive could you have to follow tradition? WHY? How many words will I write in my lifetime? What a horrible situation... SnugglyPuppy Only when I graze on an empty stomach. SnugglyPuppy Oh. Sorry. "Korio_Lanus: DepravedInfant You are drywall, a humanoid species, yet completely different in every way except phisiology" SnugglyPuppy Does eating grass make you vomit? Someone please stereotype me so I know who I am. CATEGORIZE GENERALIZE ru2213y It's ok. Just look at your Twitter avatar for 36 hours straight. "Mizzou may think it's got me, but Fairview Elementary School will always have my true heaand loyalty. FALCONS BITCH" SnugglyPuppy Hi. You aren't happy? Aww man...... You just need more SOCIAL MEDIA shoved into your COLON. I'm going to fucking overdose on all these vitamin D supplements. Went to the interview in jeans and still probably got the job. Truck Buck. Honest people don't live long. GuitarWolfToru: ?????????????BAR???????????????????? You DO NOT take on Guitarwolf in a thumb war and survive. "No tagbacks, Medusa." CORUMBIAAAA!!!! 1 2 3 4! Forgot to mention that I touched Guitarwolf's butt. It was the only place left to suppohim during his crowdsurfing. Korio_Lanus: GuitarWolf concemade my mind shit itself and my ears wana commit suicide. I crowdsurfed GuitarWolf and got his pic. ... I don't value people enough to be angry at one. Photo: GUITAR WOLF/Happy birthday Kaleb/Met Drumwolf/He was a nice dude (Taken with instagram) Uncontrolled tumble into the DMs. sweetgirlsar I'm guessing it's probably because it'd be an absolutely awful way to die. beebee880: What's your favorite kind of weather I made A Fucking Pun. Only 17 minutes left to give Your Final Answer. (hehe) I've made a terrible mistake. " to journalists, anyway. I doubt there are very many owners who actually test its limits." " the Turbo is actually considered a bit of an all-terrainer, believe it or not." ammnontet then the 911 is the car for you! " I agree, but the buying public does not, apparently." "ammnontet well...it is a public poll, I suppose. You are still a worthwhile piece of data." "Unfortunately, I've probably just turned this into ""which car's Twitter community is the most active?""" auto Porsche911 nissangtr mitsubishievo JaguarFType " how very thoughtful of you, James!" : AsphaltApostle "Poll: You need to travel a long distance very quickly on a broad variety of public road surfaces. You choose a..." I used to be funny on Twitter. why would you do this. I need a secretary. syrupf I've felt this way for a long while. Jason Fugle a chunga Green Jeans AndrewKeef: Newports HoodPoetry: What flavor ice cream is this? a_nice_frog until you come to realize what a thrill it is to intimately understand another being. Who could ask for a better team of Dads? I really like this track. I am thankful for the SUC every day. "MaximMag ""you should come on my podcast sometime.""" I genuinely believe the world would be a different place if Pimp C and DJ Screw were still with us. It's saddening the South has suffered so much loss. lihanEAD: bansky's taggiing Argentina wit his iOS app and ghis drone army Drycast lihanEAD: Drycast freddie gibbs neeew album Facebook is shit. I bought some champagne for Drycast today. Please do not let me forget to toast to Pimp C. Pimp C was an objectively extraordinary human being and he died 8 years ago today. I can't believe Earth has continued for 8 years without Pimp C. "I feel like ""living in an hourglass"" is the most insightful description of prison I've ever heard. " sweetgirlsar it's pretty dull. I'd rather you watch our actual show if you can :) LIVE on Periscope: Podcasting: Revolution or Fad? Give me press cars; I will never forget to kiss them goodnight. JaguarUSA mitsucars Porsche NissanUSA this is something I would love to test lol Misheard vectors into the DMs. Insufficient crosswind correction into the DMs. "travisjdahnke guccitwist impossible! Drywall Media, Inc. is accommodating to individuals in all states of consciousness!" "travisjdahnke guccitwist whoa! Both of you, stop fighting and visit !" travisjdahnke it smells great if you never leave the French Quarter. SweetPatoot yes. Prehistoric Thirst I finished Long Live the Pimp and...I don't have any useful opinions. You'd best wait for Brent's verdict. They say dogs look like their owners. Well... Executive sedan comedy. Still a good joke. "mrjaydeeem I was thinking something like ? | ? (This creation of yours is absolutely ingenious, by the way.)" mrjaydeeem 1998 (X308) NinjaEconomics what about broken links? :) unicode it's time to make caremoticon into emojis. mrjaydeeem I really want one for my XJR now. Somebody develop an XJR emoji. *Benz face* 8 ?? 8 "mrjaydeeem: For those that missed it, yesterday's caremoticon 8 ?? 8 was identified successfully by a couple of you as …" SWEET JONES IS THE PIMP OF THE MILLENNIUM "a_nice_frog most definitely. If there's one thing I've learned with age, it's that real joy depends upon taking real risks." "El_Flakko13: ""Show your grill if you real and you down with the trill"" Pimp C" a_nice_frog but also the most painful and arduous. "a_nice_frog not to platitude but...it'll come. I think it's inevitable. And the best paabout life, IMO." Let's all take a moment to thank Sol for beautiful girls. ciara_isobel nutsicle I hope to God I never discover that I repressed a modeling career for Sketchers. "BentleyMotors: An extraordinary day for everyone involved in Bentayga " ciara_isobel no thank YOU! Recognizing the significance is something any decent human does. You're the one doin all the work. Shoutout to all good moms. Had to flex to Ridin Dirty for Pimp C. My people... BentleyComms: A. The average length of service at Bentley is 17 years ciara_isobel fuck YES! And there's no such thing as too much praise for it. I think I can speak for humanity when I say we appreciate you. "ciara_isobel: im living proof that anyone can raise a child well, if they really want to" Bananas Honestly pretty cool. :( I'm devastated. shit...guess I'd better come up with a ring soon. Essential. "I'm kinda like a less intelligent Sherlock Holmes, I suppose." wikisext: sext: i minimize my caffeine intake...you boldly rest with your eyes closed to calm down Audi_Dad: I had an audi dream last night. Audi Dad 2015 Audi Photographic Awards IamBenBarry: Volvo S90: ‘Radical elegance’ | Autoweek "RDV69: As demonstrated by the Michelson-Morley null result, there is no absolute inertial frame of reference. Whatever... …" speedmonkeycouk: ?? Erm that's a funny looking OzzyOsbourne isn't it RealAliceCooper dearraleigh SweetPatoot I'd just like to point out that Hyundai is too modern a brand to suppothis soof misogyny. guccitwist travisjdahnke my Skype name is DepravedInfant "chubbygoddess69 I have bias, obviously, but it basically all comes down to Lamborghini outside Buffalo Wild Wings vs quiet bookish grandma." "chubbygoddess69 New Money folk are the worst thing that ever happened; Old Money families are fucking amazing, but tend to be a bit aloof." "chubbygoddess69 it all really comes down to ""new money"" and ""old money.""" PersonTheHumann creaku Femdom Ricky? "chubbygoddess69 I've spent a bit of time around actually wealthy people, and I tend to make them very uncomfortable." "chubbygoddess69 oh I definitely am, but only when it's entertaining. I half grew up on a farm, so I'll never actually belong in that crowd." PersonTheHumann creaku oh dear... Rick. "chubbygoddess69 not in any meaningful way, no. I pretend to be, though. And my family was - extraordinarily - before the Great Depression." "chubbygoddess69 that's very insightful. I agree. :) I've been trying, but it's a constant battle with my aristocratic genes." "chubbygoddess69 true, but it gets to a point where I feel like I should just shut up...except words are my greatest value so..." chubbygoddess69 yeah I've just turned into a tired old self-aware softie with an extreme sensitivity to my privilege and UltraEgo. This is a bodybuilding account. "john_overholt I'd completely forgotten about MapQuest, if I'm honest." john_overholt: This is such a weird election. chubbygoddess69 I understand. I used to be a really edgy youth until I started noticing all the collateral damage I was leaving behind. "chubbygoddess69 which is completely understandable, of course. Just unfortunate when I actually want to compliment or thank someone." "chubbygoddess69 it's nice most of the time, but tends to REALLY make it hard for people to believe me when I'm actually being genuine." GayUpdateBot: Gay Update: I'm currently feeling roaringly gay. chubbygoddess69 not exactly...I can easily/instinctively muddle the truth until its actual validity is irrelevant to anyone but a judge. "I have a natural talent for confusion, which I treasure." "Yesterday, a customer told me I ""speak like a politician,"" which I took as a massive compliment." "creaku yeah. In fact, I'm betting Rick Ross has probably been mostly spared exposure to terms like ""MRA"" and ""friendzone.""" HyperPhysics "creaku yes, but I feel like he's probably exempt from contemporary fedora stigma, don't ya think?" """Nothing is real."" " koruemporium now u woke bro avalonlicking.png things...progressed. """The steering is light...like the frivolous way I live.""" Quality journalism. E X T R E M E N I C H E Rural objectivist humor...extreme niche. Atlas Shucked Pumice humor. "ciara_isobel ""Man...I am filthy. Probably gonna need to bathe with pumice. Ever tried it? Brilliant on grease!""" "ciara_isobel ""sexual intercourse is imminent.""" """50% income tax...quaint!""" """Remember colonialism...how quaint.""" "chubbygoddess69 yes...and of course, there's the mystery... What if you become a street racing legend?" "Before boarding a flight to Europe, I shall yell the word ""quaint"" 2000 times to minimize embarrassment during my travels." "chubbygoddess69 don't worry, the fear goes away with confidence. It's essential to learning, I think. Cars are handy, if nothing else." "chubbygoddess69 ah. Well, my function in life is more or less to give people the most accurate information about them, so honesty is 1." "chubbygoddess69 probably bad ones though, I'm guessing. (If nothing else, I get to be an asshole about cars, sorry)" YahooAnswersTXT: Where is Jim? "chubbygoddess69 I suppose...the problem is that they don't really understand money, or anything about the luxury lifestyle they chase." ciara_isobel don't subtweet me. chubbygoddess69 even worse...imagine plastic football flags stuck in the windows... It is a daily test of my self-restraint. TinySeiga: wwhy honda is shrunk. why honda is shrunk bitch And don't forget to peep the prompt. "We're celebrating a year of Drycast, LIVE in 2 hours! Spread the shortlink! " "regularcars: 2001 Nissan Altima: The official car of Bible-Camp Councilors who go though adult life saying ""Cool beans.""" KillerMike: RIP Chad Butler........ "tpnug I suppose it's creative, at least." robotpup only Lucifer. syrupf: Phantom Fortune pt. 1 "ciara_isobel for a brief moment, I was prepared to K I L L." VAPE-SHAMING thinkpiecebot: Why Sleep Apnea Causes Vape-Shaming And How To Stop It thinkpiecebot: What Does E-Begging Mean For Colonialism? thinkpiecebot: Are Youths Getting High On High Blood Pressure? yasmeenanter BraideJoy recipes_better NaturalHealthng U__turn_ BirdsEye reecewyd HEY_VEGETABLE thinkpiecebot: Are Teens Getting High On Biodiversity? thinkpiecebot: It's Time To RestaThe Vegetable Lamb koruemporium regularcars """You'll always be second-best, Keith."" " " yes, you are most definitely the punny one in the relationship." : AsphaltApostle you need to turn on the car. Get it? Gettit? "We got a bit too drunk, sorry." pissboot pissboot OH MY GOD HAPPY BIRTHDAY ALEXA TODAY IS A GLOBAL HOLIDAY. "pissboot I think I remember asking ""what's a triangle?""" pissboot: my life is amazing "travisjdahnke pissboot AY. It was the anniversary episode. The whole point was to celebrate. Apparently for us, that means gettin weepy." nutsicle "travisjdahnke I was raised by antique tractors, sorry." thanks for coming on and looking at my butt + hearing about UGK. : AsphaltApostle drycast kabeebus pissboot that's smart. pissboot wait are we not Facebook friends. comedone_extra I read the King James Bible at all times. nooooooooooo maddieperhaps pissboot oh fuck thanks for the reminder. pissboot you're my favorite. Sorry I asked about your pee. pissboot (sorry) pissboot no I am completely sober. GO that's much better anyway. Have fun! :) hey Nina you should come on the show in ~40 minutes. kabeebus: Hell is real and we're all there beebee880: I'm going to sleep for a while Georgino Oval tiff_tv: So bored with talk of 'turning engines up and down' and 'overtaking boosts'. I'd have settings locked at staof race and tha… "It's all a waking nightmare. Nothing is real, including you. The Avalon awaits... " Dread Being Dear oh dear. LIVE on Periscope: Improv for Pimp C Sentreh yeeeees. Sentreh inside joke. Sentreh I have absolutely no idea. What on Earth is this. Chill sesh ?? hairlessbigfoot (Vine by BlowJorb) (Vine by Lil Gute) Have you ever thought about how weird the custom of handshaking is? NinjaEconomics: Which is worse? "mihmnop me too... I made a vine about this, but I'm too lazy to dig for it." "mihmnop name your dog Google, and all would be well." I've never understood hating publications for their bias when it's regularly made explicit...It's like hating the wind for blowing. "AndreMoeScott NinjaEconomics you're missing out, then." Even more WSJ than the WSJ usual. "mihmnop I appreciate your data, mihm." "mihmnop I guess you could say it's highlights, but for all of Twitter. It's basically their attempt to compete with news aggregators." "Poll: How do you feel about the Twitter Moments feature?" Dear oh dear. NickNehamas: area where ArtBasel stabbing happened is open again. Very hush-hush. Oblivious fair-goers sip champagne and critique abst… kabeebus: My mom reviewing the Nissan 300zx: it kinds looks like it says BOOZX marsrader: Shrinking of the great red spot. I think they work well oversized though. Lookin like you might just bust out some traffic cones at any moment. ???????? the high-visibility jacket aesthetic is perfect for you. I'm into the party scene. laurenmacr: 100 I'm always trending. PersonTheHumann ok I can bring them by tonight if you want. PersonTheHumann yeah I can come get you after work if you need to get the Avalon + headphones. ?? ?? TheOnion: States Now Offering Millions In Tax Breaks To Any Person Who Says ‘High-Tech Jobs’ … syrupf let's have a review! Yo we flexin in the triplane sweetgirlsar yes but it would have been more fun to open fire. sweetgirlsar this is why you need to carry a gun - coulda just opened fire. I'm gonna be basic for a moment And Fucking Cry. When u a lowkey Eugenics Lord. Same. ? | ? This game is called see how many followers you can lose in an hour. I'm turning into Rapmonster. WELCOME "If William Shatner is a community, I can be a community too. I AM A COMMUNITY." "When I make a mistake, I don't learn from it. I keep repeating it so as to fuck everything up." Apparently William Shatner is a community. Let's all hate ourselves together. samfrkl Twitter is my life. MY RELIGION IS CANNIBALISM MY EXISTENCE IS MEANINGLESS I AM a CONDESCENDING ASSHOLE HIP HOP MUSIC is the reason I CAN'T FLY AN AIRPLANE. HIP HOP MUSIC has made me USELESS and DEPRAVED. HIP HOP MUSIC IS THE WORK OF THE DEVIL "PAY ME to be a SOCIAL MEDIA WHORE, you FUCKS." GIVE ME MORE SHIT I WANT MORE MORE MORE I'm a materialistic FUCK. I don't want to watch TV ever again. I just want some 90s audio equipment to play with and a good turn table. You know your self-esteem is low when you're not surprised/upset at all by someone urinating on something you spent 30 minutes making. "Narly kid is the only person who truly understands what to do with a Drywall tape. He peed on it, gave it back, and only paid half price." Stop whipping yourself and listen to ihadtopee. Much more pain. Much less trouble. Christians would listen to my music if they knew about it because they're humble FUCKS. Jesus would listen to my music if he was alive. I'm probably gonna be ranting about this for several days so you may want to mute me. "I may be an American glutton, but I would be FUCKING CACKLING." LOOK AT THEIR FACES. This is the most ridiculous thing I have ever seen. JeremyClarkson: Phone charging in France GasStationMemes: Guess today's Doom Numeral! L I B E R T Y V I L L E "GasStationMemes: What'll it be today, Norbert?" ammnontet: are snakes reptiles or dogs thank. Sentreh takua343 I want a sticker. nya_ebooks: "Apparently, you need an oil rig to smoke marijuana, but not every time." I know how to have fun. takua343 Sentreh my children. DavidBlueDraws Saturday Night Out piersmorgan: I fear I am now a victim of 'cisphobia'. piersmorgan: I want to die. My boy Schumann did NOT fuck around. "PersonTheHumann 11:15, but it'll take me a bit to pick them up." Marc Macaroni nutsicle from your existence. What do you want to do most with your limited time on Earth? "nutsicle it's not a big deal if you don't, of course l, but in that case, my advice would be to find out as soon as possible." "nutsicle basically, my point is that the advice is going to be very different depending on what you want from existence." nutsicle I should mention that I've been speaking under the assumption that you value society's averaged ideal of success. "nutsicle I appear social on Twitter because I love human variety & discourse, but I am the opposite in day-to-day life." "nutsicle drop any extraordinary thoughts and behaviors, and stacopying your peers as best you can." "nutsicle and I know you've heard that answer a billion times, but it's true. You'll do better becoming vague and dull." "nutsicle I've since discovered that society values passion, self-discipline and inclusion over curiosity and reason." "nutsicle if you want to be successful, my advice is to do the opposite of what I did." "nutsicle which is why I don't understand movie or video game references, but can tell you the service intervals of a John Deere Model A." "nutsicle you're so nice to me! ?? The answer, though, is that I spent my entire childhood reading in minimal contact with other people." koruemporium I don't mind identity theft as long as the promotional bit is stolen as well. "ACTUAL living efficiency is rarely glamorous or interesting, and is almost entirely dependent upon habitual competence, not trendy gimmicks." (This doesn't mean I'm done; I'm just done for now.) "It's expected of the French... And it's kinda cute and all, but don't go thinking it's intelligent in any way. That is my role. Thanks." " yes, my beloved Nevermore." it's ok...it's kinda what the French do. I just want everyone to know how silly it is. NOT TO MENTION THE PURE HEAT INEFFICIENCY of the human body in comparison with modern infrastructural power generation. " it kinda is... But you are modern and full of life, and I am a bitter old man. (See attached rant.)" creaku: AsphaltApostle what if it's actually just a regular charging station giving you the illusion you're working for that battery l… "So you're sitting there, working up a sweat and LOOKING LIKE A FUCKING IDIOT as you raise the global temperature and ruin your phone." "Even the French power grid is waaaaay more efficient than your sweaty, pretentious ass." I'd bet my gluttonous life that the cumulative environmental impact of an interrupted cycle is higher than just USING AN AC OUTLET. "and there's NO WAY you're gonna sit there for 4 hours for a full cycle (assuming these generate AC outlet amperage/hour, which I doubt.)" "Ok... FIRST OF ALL, battery disposal is one of man's greatest hazards to the planet (so maximizing their usable life is essential,)" LIVE on Periscope: Just practicing - expect nothing "koruemporium absolutely not! I simply searched my own name. What are you, some kind of narcissist?!" Watched on Periscope: Drinks Houston nutsicle ultra-conscious. ammnont_ebooks: Vfluff5_Ebooks David Blue SailorNigga syrupf hello. ivy_hollivana chubbygoddess69 Drycast ALERT: attractive listeners. LIVE on Periscope: Observe: Basics retreat to their holes after ritual self-immolation nutsicle I'm actually older than the trees. Just two hours left! nutsicle I will be 22 on January 27th. "nutsicle I'm basically in that spot too. You have a lot more time than I do, though." "nutsicle there ya go! We have that in common, then. My primary wants are exploring human achievement, and finding someone to accompany me." "nutsicle correct me if I'm wrong, but I'd say, then, that you don't desire specific experiences - you just want to experience." oblongoto nutsicle all good. We basically got drunk and emotional so that may be for the best. "nutsicle no! It's very complicated, and I tend to confuse people with the way I speak. (Comes from minimal socializing in childhood.)" ciara_isobel and I'm honored...but it's a lot bigger in Cat's. ciara_isobel yall men slut. wordnuvola wordcloud bodybuildinga7 ciara_isobel wordnuvola wordcloud reckless AWWWWW wordnuvola: AsphaltApostle here's the word cloud for wordnuvola wordcloud ivy_hollivana wordnuvola wordcloud ciara_isobel wordnuvola wordcloud wordnuvola wordcloud koruemporium extraordinary gute flex koruemporium and I'm only gonna get worse. Monthly time on Twitter: 54 hours. RP class: Level 84 Grandmaster Tweet Warrior. Full results: My stats from _tweetails_. Favourite words: 'fuck' and 'vine'. Average word length: 4.30. Intelligence rating: Professor. Unreal. "RDV69: The Ptarmigan of Panic rememorates Cadillacs at Le Mans. Cadillac Northstar LMP1 & LMP2 " "Thanks to the folks who come into the stream called ""Just practicing - expect nothing,"" demanding in Russian that I play soft rock covers." "ammnont_ebooks: AsphaltApostle late night when you see the person you love, or 'pwned' as the kids say" ammnont_ebooks sorry. ammnont_ebooks: AsphaltApostle they don't even sell books how do you expect them to read anything """One time we paid him $8 in loose change to shit himself in the hallway.""" I own guns because I like them - that's all the reason I need. "I understand how guns can be scary if your exposure to them is limited, but they are - quite literally - just tubes." Responsible. "russellbrandom: Nothing says ""responsible gun owner"" like shooting at a piece of paper because it disagrees with you. …" ciara_isobel fuckin art. ciara_isobel: AsphaltApostle can we just This has nothing to do with Sherlock Holmes. Absolutely nothing. koruemporium ohhhhhhh dear. yeeeees. Gooooood. wordnuvola wordcloud regularcars wordnuvola wordcloud TheSmokingTire I need to marry this girl. chubbygoddess69 shit...good luck. SHIT GNOME tryina big bottom chubbygoddess69 ...are you going to be ok? "ciara_isobel I think my bias is pretty heavy, though. I Believe in Twitter." "ciara_isobel that's ok. Twitter's a good place to be angry, and I'm not saying that ironically." ciara_isobel letting david gettit "ciara_isobel nope - it doesn't go back very far, actually." BITCH PUTIN water reason ass ireland Analysis Hour ciara_isobel BlackNGifted91 Nobody wants to room with God? I need to set up account on the Parthenon website. And my hair. And my gigantic desk. And my Big Bandwidth-Crushing Butt. Who wants to provide a home for David Blue? oh... Sorry. It's actually that I'm really tired of car culture & heterosexuality being so fucking interdependent. mihmnop Samson. is your face ok? " I'd retweet this, but everyone likes to make the ""David Blue probably fucks cars"" joke, and I believe it to be unclean." I've completely mastered the untrustworthy look. Remember when I looked like a fuckin cauliflower. "The audience seems more interested in my hair than my writing, though. Guess I could staselling that." "I need to sell a screenplay or something, but I can't write one without breaking at least one fundamental rule of film." CATHERINE ?? omw It's time for y'all to stapaying for my content because it's not going to be possible for much longer unless $$$ happens. Wir sind gewohnt dass die Menschen verhöhnen was sie nicht verstehen. """We stood hand in hand like two children, and there was peace in our hearts for all the dark things that surrounded us.""" """There is nothing more unaesthetic than a policeman.""" "Populus me sibilat, at mihi plaudo Ipse domi simul ac nummos contemplar in arca." "Shit... Hope I haven't gone too edgy. Let's bring it back a bit... I'VE BEEN WATCHING THE OFFICE ON NETVID! SMALL AND FUNNY MIKE, SIT DOWN!" "Do not be afraid. I may be a sociopath with a gun, but only because it's pretty, and I am vain. I'm much too self-absorbed to be violent." "In other words, we are fucking dumb and crazy." "America's gun violence problem has nothing to do with availability - it's because ignorance, if allowed to fester, leads to insanity." "content_liker I'm to the point where I REALLY need to stacashing in on my intellect, and I'm trying to determine how to do so." I've been thinking about compiling and selling a book of my poetry for cash. Do you think it'd be worth my time? Cumfyshorts that's thanks to OurEdisons. You can find it here: I like this a lot. lishainik: quick! Promote ! I can't believe I saved the gays. My aesthetic is The Adventures of Vin Fiz. h syrupf this is me every day. syrupf: boats be like barbieriiv: NatGeoTravel A3. Playing around on a frozen Lake Champlain in Burlington Vermont -- BTV natgeotravelchat … HIPR: A1: Switzerland's GstaadPalace! Stunning views make you feel like you're inside a snow globe NatGeoTravelChat … "simonshieldcars: ""Madge"" A calendar to raise funds for R.A.B.I is on my Christmas list. Had a ride too. SundayScenario …" silerroad: You know you're in a special place when the 1st thing u see is a Bugatti worth about $50 million. PetersenMuseum … ciara_isobel toyajoy_ dori_grant22 please visit and donate. Thanks! ciara_isobel xxspecialkay please visit and donate. kabeebus: This is how I spend my time as a professional graphic designer AsphaltApostle AsphaltApostle OurEdisons I hope I've made you proud. Witnessed a really cute thing. Chunk Hole C H U N K I N G S A B B A T I C A L Bang-on Bod. I have a Banging Bod. DeadDigitizer RippleFrog you won. Pet Dad. Terry's getting mad because I won't stop saying it. BlewTgod: Dawg... I'm in publix and a lady gonna come up to me and ask where's the milk "I thank the species for the existence of the word ""chunking"" immediately after I wake up every single day." CHUNKING "My phone corrected this to ""Chunga."" We clearly know each other well enough; I think I'm ready to film my review." Chingy. CATHERINE AllBeautyKievie ciara_isobel hello. I'm David Blue. TweetABondThatCanNeverBeBroken Nugget & Bean ?? Here's a sample excerpt for ya. akiba_k3i good visual. akiba_k3i: validate me "If anyone knows how to go about self-publishing legitimately, I could use some words about it." "content_liker at this point, I think we've determined as a species that advice unfollowed by the giver is no less worthy." "content_liker good advice, except that I am unqualified to teach, and have found myself too restless for academia." """Jesus was hot.""" I may be tired enough to actually have a worthwhile piano improv to scope later. ammnontet murder is the opposite of fun - it's a pain in the ass. I would (and have) had WAAAAYY more fun counseling a couple on their relationship than I would playing video games / beer pong with them. comedone_extra (I probably like this game too much.) "comedone_extra 5. It's ok. We both know I would do stuff like this for free anytime." "comedone_extra 4. Theft" "comedone_extra 1. Longing 2. Restlessness 3. Joy" I need to get a manicure again it was amazing. "comedone_extra absolutely. For a small fee, of course." When u a pretty bitch but u always strapped Ambition without direction is just bullshit. "ivy_hollivana but now, you're a Chunker! (Meaning, you are skilled at chunking.)" "ivy_hollivana you're an official Chunk, Ivy." maddieperhaps no I'll probably be occupied with it for awhile. You may want to mute me for the next few days. maddieperhaps: AsphaltApostle r u done chunking yet "Yes, chunking is my new toy word, but I am serious about this." "You know that group of people I'm always trying to define? I have a name for them now!!! Chunks!" "Chunkable Chunkers, chunking" Chunk-ass Chunkage Chunking sesh C H U N K E D ammnontet what the fuck. AND THIS And I happened to have a historically correct P-40 livery. And a Phillip Defranco selfie. "Mostly because I got to fuck up Hans Zimmer's STUPID BASIC ""WIDE"" GARBAGE." lamp_head I was actually quite terrified by this lol This is my favorite of the Drywall films. lamp_head FPQOW*YRP (UIF:L : WHAT THE POFIUYP()*Y&% "74 years ago today, the US Navy suffered a devastating surprise attack, but what REALLY happened in the aftermath? " lamp_head incredible. ivy_hollivana an improv virtual vocal bossa nova band could destroy vaporwave forever. "I can hear myself correcting, but have ZERO recollection of it. I remember dreaming, though. Literal dream music, I suppose." ivy_hollivana I've been wanting to staa bossa nova band. This still creeps me out a bit tbh. "ivy_hollivana that would definitely be rad! I'm not a very talented theorist, though. 0 method - I kinda just let stuff out on the piano." ivy_hollivana I actually did fall asleep while playing my upright once (and kept playing) ((and caught it on tape)) ivy_hollivana h!!! Thank you! ?? "ivy_hollivana thank you for watching, fellow Chunk." Chunkness "ryandeel thanks for watching and commenting on my Scope, Ryan. I gotta ignore the chat to stay in the zone, but I appreciate it." LIVE on Periscope: Sleepy improv - expect nothing Unless I have to sell it. "TweetABondThatCanNeverBeBroken Nevermore & I, together forever. " I should staselling shoVO bits on Twitter. Got my free case from Apple today. Look for an unboxing on this weekend! Did anyone else notice that Microsoft and multiple sclerosis have the same acronym? LisaBirnbach certainly doesn't live in the world I know. Really Nightline?! REALLY?! I lost so much respect for ABC because of that interview. "wilw: Congratulations, Star Trek, on 44 years of going boldly, something I'm proud as hell to be paof." "Well.....I didn't get a definite answer from the FAA. They cited no specific regulation, but mentioned that they (cont) " Cryptic_Stormy oh ok! I really like the way the forums are now anyway. "If you haven't been keeping up, I had 2 obstacles for my 3rd class medical. 1st was my vision, which was (cont) " At my phycologist's office. HOPEFULLY I'll find out the final verdict on whether or not my training will continue. STO site is down. Possibly the forum redesign Cryptic_Stormy was talking about in his priority one interview? It'd be awesome to put a Star Trek PADD theme on an iPad. TactDefender: TacticalDefender.com is now on Youtube! Subscribe now. guillorybe Just saw you in CoveAffairs. Great job! You really need to stop guest starring as people that die though...... "Just saw ""Meeting David Wilson."" It's possibly the best film of any genre I've seen." DDrDark: A good design starts with a good coffee. "ConanOBrien: LeVar Burton wants to staa Twitter war with me. I don't have time to feud with anyone who appeared in the Cameo ""Wor ..." Posted another BAP video update! outasight 's new album is....indescribably good. GET IT....NOW! "JasonPDean I don't know what system plasticpilot has, but I can notice a difference on my 4gb machine. And if (cont) " plasticpilot an Adobe AIR application like TweetDeck would be handy for watching all the ConnectPilots lists though. "plasticpilot yeah I can understand that. Adobe AIR does hog A TON of RAM. Tweetie is slick, simple, and smooth." plasticpilot I used Tweetie for awhile before using TweetDeck. It's nice for multiple accounts. Anyone interested in fitness might want to follow my bro paleoathletics or visit his website: (cont) Does anyone actually use Google+? "Goodbye, ADD. I'll miss you." Inviolate. WordsINeverUseInConversation Someone please kill digital music. Photo: Ruski calibrating a GPS unit in the post office (Taken with instagram) Gorerag Ruskichan is my life. FUCK DECENCY FUCK HYGIENE FUCK CLEANLINESS Photo: Taken with instagram samfrkl AM I NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU? AFFLUENTLY FUCKED samfrkl Me. GLOBALIZATION Do engines have souls? How did I not lose any followers today? Hypocrisy is hilarious. "Jam nothin' but that screw, fool." I'm gonna knock my gas tank loose. I'm going to eat 2 tons of sodium so I won't have to urinate for 3 years. samfrkl I AM TWITTER. syrupf this is amazing. syrupf: syrupf: "syrupf I'm sorry that you have to suffer through rural horror, syrup. It looks cool to me but I am from the backwards country." "PersonTheHumann yeah, there were a few joggers in ridiculous clothing, but the cigarette smoke kept them away." VICE: Was Jesus gay? "PersonTheHumann the bleak cold is utopian for me. The insincerity of Cherry Hill, not so much." Same. HannahElliott you sure that's Earth? HannahElliott: Today on luxury: Driving the Superformance Cobra Slab Side and oh la la it's fun. Casual accompaniment. "My ""morning jog"" outfit adds up to over $1000. Oops..." " well, they do say I'm a demon, and you can't curse those." Catherine is a blessing. it was pretty much the same here when I was last up to speed. Though the Midwest is still ruled by John Deere and Case IH. " that definitely brings back memories... I grew up in a John Deere household, so I wore tons of that stuff at his age." nutsicle now...WHAT did she just say about my wife?! " so the whole range matched, from the largest tractor, down to the lawn tractors. " " oh yes, I definitely had a thing for tractors. In the 60s, John Deere actually had DESIGNERS, if you can believe it." " speaking of which, I had a 1520 as a kid (literally half the 3020 in every way; fucking adorable.) " yeah it looks a 3020 to me. *infinite love eyes* ClickHole: 7 Most Common Email Scams To Watch Out For ClickHole: Incredible. ClickHole: 8 Things Only People Who Have Been Inside A Car Understand syrupf: Dirty work is done on computer. Clean work is done on phone! "Always, the best memes" "GasStationMemes: The night calls to bits of me I dare not name The tar in my heatightens its grip I fear I may succumb to the darkn…" Funeral (Vine by uhhmmily) Visiting my favorite viners in LA (Vine by Dan_Curtin) I have some content. RealDogNames: Death Loving Fuck en_jajaja: Just gonna say it since no one else will marriage_txt: I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU … marriage_txt: marry me mothuerfucker marriage_txt: Marry the shit outta me "marriage_txt: Hello, Marry me because fuck u" Gizmodo: Unprecedented image shows a dolphin's echolocated impression of a submerged human … necrosofty: let us remember to watch this gif at least once per year ciara_isobel damnit. PersonTheHumann yeah I can do thing after work and I'll actually be clean. I have no money though $$$$ PersonTheHumann yeah sorry I woke up late enough I figured you already went to sleep. I hope you watched my fucking on Pearl Harbor day. Shuapeck: chillin "idiot_joke_teen cool poll, thanks." goat_boyfriend sweetgirlsar IM ALREADY DEAD. Fuck. I'm going to die in a half-ton Chevy pickup. nutsicle same. inclushe ammnontet Silkylinks CashisDray: drycast : whiteandfaded: They grow up so fast?? Why is there a Lamborghini involved?? Alex Jones is the fastest man on the planet. syrupf: verge: Apple unveils official 25-hour battery case for the iPhone 6 and 6S ammnontet: gero game. "LILBTHEBASEDGOD: buttcheeks cadillac. buttcheeks honda accord" I'm Chuck Cock I'm Charles Koch Flex. Infinite night. Andrew_Frankel: Pure class from our local timber flooring company "matty_prior: Autocar double issue out today. (I know.) Anyway, includes Christmas road test of East Anglian Air Ambulance .:. …" "ciara_isobel if they ever do, ima be ready with the ?????" Saint Nicholas noantica: "ciara_isobel Ciara you know you're a gorgeous, sexy mom. Tell them simpleton haters to step the fuck off." orgamecha I am scary. Finna. Deadly Donuts norm: They will try to close the door on you. Just open it. - DJ Khaled "a_nice_frog honestly the only people you need to follow on vine are Lil Gute and tpnug. No pronoun jokes, just infinite entertainment." SITREP: This has all the makings of a popular Tweet. Roll coal on ISIS "Sip syrup, roll coal, jam nothin but that Screw, fool" Hell. Go forth and secure the dick. TF2Torrent I'm gonna pee on you. I'm Obama. 2 Who was the irresponsible fuck that drudged me up? Haunt. "RichardDawkins: It is very good that Wikipedia also gives a page to ""Internet Meme"". Internet memes are arguably the most important sub…" Right-o. tpnug a_nice_frog I'm glad the purple hearts are just for me. aIbertjazeera salty old dog. "verge: Who leaves a Boeing 747 at an airport, much less three " aIbertjazeera is he still alive? I'm thicc "poem_exe: thrift store i may live on winter begins" Wow. Auto_Attic: Fuel stop 1966 - Lamborghini 350 GT Baroque Bitch ciara_isobel this is as close as I got. benwhitworth: Cracking drive to work today. Turbo blower + cold dense air = yeahbaby. CARmagazine vauxhall corsa vxr Vauxhall http… AutoExpress: Could this be the closest you can get to a diesel M3? Our Alpina D3 Touring review: … I wish I had gotten a senior quote. ciara_isobel do you think I was? orgamecha A S C E N D F O O D "PersonTheHumann I must be the community man - like by all, including devout Dollar Shave Club members." "SailorNigga only if you'd enjoy it. It's quite voluntary, you know." "orgamecha Underground Food, beneath the life-rich soil." Not enough chunking today. SailorNigga PersonTheHumann causeless disgust seems like the faculty of a madman to me. I'm a fleshy boy. SailorNigga I am a flea. Hold an image of my face in your mind whilst having a really painful shit. PersonTheHumann SailorNigga is making the meat for me. "*beef, sorry" I'm actually very glad someone has a steak with me. I feel like a real boy now. SailorNigga they say great minds think alike. krumpbattle: dont send nudes unless it has the french flag over it show some respect Thank God my neighbors now know to call me Hungry Heidi in the morning and Dumping Doris after sunset. Catherine. Catniss Shunt the fuck off. bodybuildinga7: ? Basketball Mark Zucchini I've been walking like 7.5 miles a day. I am too old for this. evvandvvorak good shirt! Good color work! Good boy! PersonTheHumann phosho. evvandvvorak I usually record a video or floss around in this situation. we did good. " I'm gonna demonstrate with Terry, hang on." " just grab for it - has worked well in my experience. Or if you're sitting, place your hand on their leg, palm-up." : License plate PLAGUE BuCoin "Make me some pie or I'll shit on your thigh" Would the Queen ban Drywall? Jesus Vaped pissboot they are so complicated. I wonder every day how people manage it. "nutsicle me too. Have to say, your Aunt is very sexy when she's Tweeting literature." nutsicle yup. I did a Seth Green. "SailorNigga ok. Does it bother you when I retweet you / read your writing? If it does, just let me know." chunking this creosote "nutsicle wwaaait no, it's actually a rebuttal, by Terry Pratchett. " orgamecha I'm gonna LOVE this! nutsicle Annales Veteris et Novi - James Ussher That sound your phone makes when u about to get a HUGE email!!! Is Weev actually in Serbia right now? When u find out your best friend is actually Edward Snowden!!!! Tumbling into your DMs like OurEdisons I'm always lost. OurEdisons sorry. koruemporium yup. I want to go to Ireland. Elon Musk is lying to you. OurEdisons Elon Musk can suck my ass. "OurEdisons Shunt your chunker, thommie." great socialmedia poll PollWednesday Land of the Swang no me. Featuring the plant Nevermore killed with its stare. I think the love of my life is here. : Cross eyed cool shi depends on who you ask + your individual needs. My brother can tell you precisely what you need but it's big $$$ don't do it - it's no fun. next wordcloud is gonna be INTENSE. " thefrickhead then you catch him in your arms and say ""shhhh it's ok...you're my husband now.""" just not excessively! " if all else fails, just tell him to ""hold my fucking hand you prick.""" ummm... Then wiggle your fingers a bit. I've found that tends to be associated with holding it. Catherine. "I want a white t-shithat just says ""OPRAH"" in bold black text." " always a pleasure, James." : "comedone_extra no, it's ridiculous out of context. But hey, they're Iowans. They are Gods." "comedone_extra it's actually a pretty cool origin story. I'm a bit too attached to the company, tbh." "comedone_extra HyVee, yes. [THIS WAS FILMED OFF THE CLOCK, OUT OF THE VIEW OF CUSTOMERS. I REPEAT: THIS WAS FILMED OFF THE CLOCK, OUT OF TH" "The universal preface to ""here's the deal:"" " "mrjaydeeem oh I'm not particularly interested in purchasing one, but I appreciate any opportunity to talk about anything automotive." "mrjaydeeem every 7-Series owner I've approached has been startled or irritated by the idea of conversation, which is fitting, I suppose." mrjaydeeem both. akiba_k3i ?? I really appreciate that dude. I'm gonna try to have it on Amazon by February. "akiba_k3i my ultimate love letter to my XJR is like 7 pages long and still growing, so you'll have a reason to buy my book lol" "I guess it's all about to become public anyway, so here ya go. " I write a lot of poetry about my Jaguar. comedone_extra Snot Squad I keep trying to get this old 7-Series owner to talk to me about his car and he always looks really creeped out. blowing raspberries. (??(xxxÍxxx)??) " mrjaydeeem is it smart? Genuinely, one of the best automotive social media bits I've seen in awhile." mrjaydeeem yes! Brilliant! Thank you. "mrjaydeeem: Today's car emoticon (??(xxxÍxxx)??) was (obviously!) a Jag XJR and AsphaltApostle s one at that ;-) …" This vine always makes me whimper aloud. yungPOTUS koruemporium life hack U L T I M A T E C A T H E R I N E 3. My first album was recorded for my first crush (6th grader named Elizabeth) in preschool on a My First Sony. It was mostly yelling. thanks. I feel like I'm going to end up talking about car stuff. Anyone have anything personal they'd like to know? 2. I spent half my time on a farm until I was 14. A 1980 Mazda Rx-7 was my first friend. First car at age 10: Geo Metro bought for $100. "1. I have 4 half-sisters and 1 half-brother, but am considered a Whole Sibling. They are 15-21 years older than me." I'm gonna do it. Oprah: He Catherine is precious. koruemporium more or less. "At 3AM a song came on the radio that was just ""there ain't no shame in bein a white man, through and through"" repeating. I was ashamed." syrupf Thought of a really good Tweet. ammnontet koruemporium just assume that everything was. "koruemporium yes, I made a joke." "The Holy Bible was originally published by Drywall Media, Inc." but I popped that whale like an ice cold can of Pepsi. I am Christ. Think I might actually get Terry to do a quick Scope with me in about 4 hours! syrupf: 2 "One day, we will capture it, and I will finally be Vine famous." "Terry and I have a synchronized routine where we do this rapidly & repeatedly. It's even a method of foot travel, believe it or not." BISCUITS "BlSCUlTS yes, of course. Though I'm not sure I could smoothly pull it off, if I'm honest." "AsphaltApostle it's PREFACE OF*, you shunt chunker." Oh no she woke up. PetStar444 No. What would PETA say? Reading about economics and recording the sound of my dog sleeping. ACGOfficial: ROOBIE PHAWLS TAPES / DRYWALL TAPES. Photo: Jaycore (Taken with instagram) Should I or should I not record my dog sleeping and release it as an album? I'm such an anarchist Tweeting from the basement of my mother's suburban upper-middle class house on a laptop she bought me. Why can't you conformist faggots understand that I want to fall every 20 feet to harsh noise? Requested Merzbow at the roller rink. They didn't play it. Photo: TRAMP STAMP (Taken with instagram) Photo: Eye Formation tape. Thanks Justice. I like it. (Taken with instagram) "Local punk tapes recorded with an omnidirectional mic, all in the right channel. Yessss" Interstice. WordsINeverUseInConversation Photo: Sweetness. PASTEURIZED MILK AND HIP HOP MUSIC WILL KILL YOU Photo: Rainy day/2012 Lexus RX350/grocery run (Taken with instagram) Errybody in the club gettin' healthy. Audi has invaded my dreams. Because I have to take fucking amphetamines to survive in society. "In theory, starting Adderall back again tomorrow will fix everything." "11. The piano is my only real outlet of genuine creative emotion. I've been playing since age 3, but my skill is limited b/c I ONLY improv." sweetgirlsar don't cry! I can't marry everybody. Or at least that's what they tell me. "Fuck, I missed Cybershunt." CyberEveryword: ???????????? sweetgirlsar I'm afraid my heabelongs to another. Vice IV: Not Fucking Around About Suffering Anymore Y'all are gonna have to help me out; I need a prompt for number 11. We Convinced This 25-Year-Old Aspiring Teacher To Abandon Her Career For Soulja Boy Fandom Incredible. LIVE on Periscope: Pitch: Our ingenious youth-targeted ironic car brand creaku I was a machine of a child. "10. My time on a farm led to some incredibly cliché scenes. Ex: Long afternoon walks with my bolt-action Marlin .22 and yellow lab." a_nice_frog o fuck. Tactical Sam? (You can guess which one was me) "9. The first recorded correspondence between Brent and I is from a second-grade project and reads: ""Do you like dogs?"" ""RUDDER UP ELEVATOR""" 8. I carried bits of random electronic hardware throughout elementary school to ensure my peers would be too terrified to fuck with me. wellshjw mrjaydeeem yes! Absolutely. I want almost every old XJ I see. "7. The anti-art, anti-sense attitude of Drywall was a reaction to the overwhelmingly mechanical/practical nature of my childhood interests." "sweetgirlsar sorry, he's unable to tonight but he promised to stop by before Friday's Drycast!" 6. The work and regular discourse with friends required by Drycast have been an integral pain my healing process from a personal trauma. "5. Brent is responsible for introducing me to 90% of the a(music, film, etc.) that I consume." "4. Primary wants from existence are 1. To experience and write about as much human achievement as possible 2. A companion with whom to do so" OurEdisons thank you! "15. I believe the human species to be incredibly capable & noble, and have lots of words for you about it should you say otherwise." "koruemporium definitely, as a child. Haven't since I've made peace with myself." "14. That said, I have never cried over the death of a family member, but often did as a child when we'd trade in an old car or tractor." koruemporium periods without an outlet. koruemporium I'm sorry. 13. The most significant moment in my life to date was seeing the Spirit of St. Louis & the Wright Flyer in the Smithsonian. (I cried.) 12. The only Internet videos that can regularly make me emotional are aviation-related compilations. (I cry at air show videos) syrupf: d­ My daughter is very funny! "Well, if y'all aren't gonna help me with personal questions, I'll just continue to list nerdy things." you look smug as fuck. " I suppose it's not fair for me to answer now, is it?" amazing. On that boil order flex. : Do I have a battery management fetish? ciara_isobel there is nothing that would put me off - unless you used to work for the Food Network or something. ciara_isobel oh dear. Does it involve poop? ": I think i just thought the worst thing ever. Mario crashes his Saab into a sports car, says ""Mama Miata!""" "syrupf: how it feels to chew gum" sweetgirlsar no I need a personal question! I'm out of ideas for this thing. HELP LIVE on Periscope: Practice/improv - expect nothing "koruemporium and I think it reminds me that I'm not the only human being who thinks we're amazing, and have done amazing things." "koruemporium 100% serious. Aviation is one of those ""close to the heart"" things for me. All of my childhood heroes were pioneer airmen." This still gets me all puffy and bothered. Dry till I die. PersonTheHumann o no... akiba_k3i I am food. a_nice_frog: MoonReplica ?????? "You want to hit him, don't you?" Look this pathetic bitch. good cuz they would be FUCKING WRONG. PersonTheHumann the holy Bavarian tree extends its roots & influence to all spirits under its protection. didn't anybody tell you the 90s are over!!!!???? PersonTheHumann I'm going to laugh at this for the rest of my life. kabeebus shucks! kabeebus going to hopefully have Carlos Ruiz on the show. (Comic book artist & brother-in-law.) You're our authority on that stuff. "kabeebus phosho, 8PM." 17. I'd like to think I'm the only person of my generation to have piloted an actual steam-powered riverboat. "And I'm NOT a Randian, but I do have some affection for the old hag. She was freakin crazy & loved abusing amphetamines just like me." PersonTheHumann I've been munching on it. So SO impressed by Julia Beverly's potency as a biographer. koruemporium the ironic thing is that most people can see through their own emotions like an act. Everyone is a sociopath to some degree. "Which is how I manage to be so pretentious, flat, AND nonsensical." "16. For better or worse, the greatest unconscious literary influences on my written style are Charles Lindbergh, Ayn Rand and Poe." "15,000 miles together, my dark steed & I. " "Live every day like you're constantly being chased by a man in a vest & fedora holding a pocket watch and screaming ""THE PODCAST'S STARTING""" World War II was actually caused by my hair. syrupf: "gIitzy colesprouse rollercoasters are boring so I wouldn't mind if Cole gave me a shopiggyback ride, I guess..." What's actually in the PT Cruiser USA books? Like...what could they possibly be? She chunked me. What even fucking. I'm glad I can agree! """I'm gonna run & slap the toilet real quick.""" """One thing is certain: Jews eat."" - Leonard Nimoy, just now." colesprouse: just trying to cover up my bald spot JosieSimonet I actually saw one of these holy butt. Why didn't this get approved for the campus story? I didn't even show me peeing or anything. "koruemporium I think we're more likely to learn a lot more, sooner, from the creation of actual artificial intelligence." koruemporium we're pretty close. Ima hit up my boy Jupiter in a few years. : Thot pic of the week "koruemporium well, I was referring to actually operating an airplane, but yes." "I miss flying every day, but the time will come again soon, I'm sure." koruemporium lets just pretend I wrote this correctly. koruemporium that's the other component: flying an airplane is the most natural and beautiful thing ever. koruemporium flying makes you a God in every way I'd want to be. (I was had planned on being a commercial pilot for most of my life.) Nobody does it better. This is art. evvandvvorak cool. Now what? This is amazing. HeadlineSmasher: Iowa: A Place to Be. HeadlineSmasher: New Study Says That Yesterday Was Banned HeadlineSmasher: A Danish Man Has Been Confirmed HeadlineSmasher: Very Concerned About the Moon HeadlineSmasher: Mom Pranks Her Son in Benghazi Attack sheets of the wherry wordnuvola wordcloud Literally me. MsBeyhave you ask them to visit and donate. """Hey Siri, remind me to find myself when I get home.""" G R O C E R Y P R I E S T guccitwist cloudypianos every sound you hear must befit your demise. cloudypianos guccitwist I'd suggest you just turn the radio off. "JCoIeworId: ?? fuck you don't huyourself. SUPERB. Everyone wants me to eat. Official revival of ExpressionsWithDave. swag (Vine by Lil Gute) what the fuck. " ""Power cycling"" is going to be in my vows somewhere." PostYourDrafts PostYourDrafts Can someone help me make this the error 404 for the drywall website? I don't remember how. This is the best photograph I have ever seen. Very accurate. " he is the healthy & youthful me from an alternate reality. He could only remain in our world for a few minutes, so we posed." THANK GOD I FOUND YOU AGAIN Follicle apogee. Come on guys... They're going to expire! Please help! This is still my all-time favorite photograph of me. I'll never be this youthful again. akiba_k3i: AsphaltApostle David Buick "serial: Hi again " granitetide: Drywall Media is aiming our sights squarely on GM and the rest of the out-of-touch anti-grassroots car makers. LIVE on Periscope: Sleepy improv - expect nothing mrjaydeeem HeadlineSmasher indeed. Margarita in coffee makes it taste like lemon tea. I'm gonna do a tired piano scope in just a bit. "mrjaydeeem someone probably would, believe it or not. Wealth and pretentiousness are often found taking refuge in one another." ANGEL. Good. "mrjaydeeem too much work. ""Poetry"" means any arrangement of words these days. I could probably just write ""shit"" and declare it art." "mrjaydeeem (in the ""imperfection is art"" sense.)" "mrjaydeeem good advice, definitely. I really just need to cash in on my writing skills ASAP, and poetry is the least disciplined school." I just danced with Michael Coward. ammnontet thanks!! And thanks for being on the show. It's a big deal for us. I will D O W N L O A D at the soonest opportunity. TRENT SALMON BRENT AND I ARE GETTING CHAMPAGNE. WE WILL BE BACK SOON. "ammnontet: ""when did princess diana die?"" ""1997."" ""that's good."" AsphaltApostle" "ammnontet is on fucking show, you shits. " Drycast is LIVE and nude cuck podcast livepodcast wilw gaming pissboot yes ma'am. In 53 minutes. LIVE on Periscope: Drycast pre-show errands "Drycast is going LIVE in two hours with some irreverence, some complaints, and possibly some nudity. " Did Dadchat die? "RapGameShinji: This is a tweet, 1 fav= 1 fav, 1 retweet= 1 retweet." : Havin fun with the Lads "HistoryInPics: Photographer Harry Warnecke gets the NYPD to reenact the moment they stopped traffic for a cat and her kitten, 1925. htt…" "OnlyCarrera: Good night guys! Porsche porscheforbreakfast 911 918 Porsche918 918Spyder Hybrid AirCooled Classic Vinta… https…" zbindendesign: "zbindendesign: Waves of Snow by Fabio Marchini " solikebasically: My friend took this photo & now I have a new spiritual leader FevR206: Take care of me the way DJ Khaled takes care of his orchid thefrickhead: I WAS CHECKING OUT MY OWN BUTT AND I RAN INTO A DOOR. Is this not the cutest thing. "ArishaInTokyo: This season is so beautiful. ?????????????? " JariMattiWRC: This is my choice for this weekend! What do you think? ?? AudiQuattro LuckyMe rallyprealpi "RDV69: The Platypus of Doom loses himself in the linkages. Throttle linkage Bugatti 35 " HUGOBOSS: .leethegod1975 askLewis tama323: "LuxuriousImages: Rolls Royce Wraith's ""Sky Roof"" " CARmagazine: Unveiled this week: the new Citroen E-Mehari Perhaps he is just cruel. "If God was real, he'd have made me a goose so I could honk at any time." "mrjaydeeem of course ""I kick the checkered sphere very far!"" is more likely." "mrjaydeeem ""if you apply a bumper sticker to my car, I will huyour family.""" "mrjaydeeem hopefully, nothing." mrjaydeeem that's an oxymoron. u on Abbey st. yo koruemporium yungPOTUS I know I just like to act like a botherable huffy hubby sometimes. It's good practice. "koruemporium yungPOTUS there are this psychological phenomenon called ""humor."" It's pretty cool." yungPOTUS I don't want to kill you. "Some of my best Tweets are authored on Saturdays, but y'all are always off playing that beer ping game." More. virgyvirgil ohhh not MY organs lol This is being auctioned off in Paris right now and I'm wondering if human organs are an accepted currency in France. "If you missed it, here's the Scope in which I confused the shit out of some Russians for 30 minutes. " ammnontet ammnontet: when u get to introduce yourself to one of your idols and u accidentally stabragging about yourself to look cool … ammnontet: when you try to fit your whole portfolio onto your business card SUPERB. Are there any channel-esque embeddable widgets that would automatically display the stream every time we go live on YouTube? absolutely. heathdwilliams: ok i think that's enough Star Wars think pieces you guys "ZackKlapman: Is ""shucks"" just a sneaky 1950s-friendly combo of ""shit"" and ""fuck""? *Takes off lab glasses dramatically. ""My god...""" Villainous friends. Edgy Egyptian Memes tpnug LITTLE NUGGET OH MY GOD. ?? Would a night of clubbing with David Blue be an enjoyable experience? Is there seriously a new Independence Day movie. What in the heck fucking is happening to my planet. The warm weather gave me a sickness. sageboggs: The new Star Wars script just leaked. Unreal Omne ignotum pro magnifico. Chill Will Remix (HD Version) (Vine by SymphonicRon) """The London slavery.""" "Schade dass die Natur nur einen Mensch aus dir schuf, Denn zum würdigen Mann war und zum Schelmen der Stoff." Chris_Meloni: When stretching ur shoulder joint becomes an interweb sensation stretchingMatters ciara_isobel turnt! "GenreGenerator: i'm jamming out to arock obedient metal" Relaxing alternative to THC: Death. Pissbutte """Shawn"" - crap yourself mid-yawn" LIVE on Periscope: Quiet improv on ye olde upright robotpup ultrabird. kabeebus yeah I can understand that. kabeebus idk dude your nuclear one could've easily been one of his. GrumpNation TrumpGrump LIVE on Periscope: Yell at the grumpy boy NASA_Hubble are you a boy or girl? koruemporium yungPOTUS you got something against my boy Hubble? everybody in DC intentionally keeps a full bladder so they'll act with more urgency. Photo: Taken with instagram Ice heist. The worst place on earth. Deridingly. WordsINeverUseInConversation Mike Wallace is dead... What a shame. I grew up hearing that guy's voice. I was going to be a decent human being and not solely communicate in shitty memes but then I took an arrow to the knee. Photo: I never let go of my phone so as to always be a slave to social media. Photo: Still adorable. Photo: She’s adorable. I love adverbs. Especially when there is essentially no possible context to use them in. "Ubiquitously. WordsINeverUseInConversation" "NO MONEY, NO LIFE" "Distract me, Twitter. I don't want to write this paper." "If y'all can Instagram photos of your food EVERY TIME you eat, I can Instagram photos of my waste every time I shit." Korio_Lanus I don't see you Instashit spamming yet. I want a little sister to be protective of. SnugglyPuppy Strike up a conversation with a random passenger about 16th century ain the Western world. Why am I watching the Bieber movie? "BeyondTheRails: File will only be available for one day. After that, all digital files will be deleted. Only cassettes will exist." BeyondTheRails: Drywall - Affluently Inviolate Korio_Lanus You'd better Tweet so much. adrianfer15 because it's cute. "The results are in, and I think they're probably wrong." : Children in business suits talking in industry jargon will always be funny to me blessed. YahooAnswersTXT: I Killed Someone and I have questions.? syrupf: DavidBlueDraws Ultrafuture "ammnontet I did but I listened to it very quietly because I was hungover lol. I'm gonna REALLY bump it the next time I'm able to ""jog.""" Here's some XK120 pornography. exist in such a range of intense colors. how can your eyes do this!!!!????? "Comically Dysfunctional Household VI, by Sergio Mayoré" PeterGriffithss Dogknob1 (The Titanic II joke has kept me entertained for years.) PeterGriffithss Dogknob1 Just.... I want to do more movies but I never remember them so... ScottNiswander: ExplainAFilmPlotBadly Guy on drugs wins the war by throwing a frisbee. "Tiny coward impregnates quirky, indecisive teen. ExplainAFilmPlotBadly " SoLyrical: Disobedient teen disfigures her body in hopes to get dick ExplainAFilmPlotBadly YES. VERY GOOD YES. "carrera4it: ?? Ferrari 275 GTB: Restoration in pictures via classicdriver AutoBant MagRetroPassion …" CKRacingUK: JohnGreatorex zootcadillac silerroad: Today has been fun. McLaren 570S carporn mantisgreen adrianfer15 "kabeebus I think I did in 8th grade. So - effectively, no." HARMINI731 thanks again! HARMINI731: AsphaltApostle Hey bro! Its HARMINI from Periscope. Here is the song/Video I wss telling you about. IF I GO AWAY! https:/… LIVE on Periscope: The Lord is taking your questions Guys I'm about to do a divine scope. Get ready. kabeebus CoxworthIII y'all are going to be good friends. "tpnug I could give her plenty of reasons to appreciate you, though. Just HML." 0kbps thefrickhead you have beef on pewds now. If you never need to take him down...???????? 0kbps thefrickhead I still can't believe this happened. "tpnug I can't believe someone still uses the expression ""had it up to my eyebrows."" ????Respect????" This is he: kabeebus PersonTheHumann I can hear it now. Hank Hell Friends don't let friends staa podcast. "I'm not using ""hot shot"" enough in daily conversation." "ammnontet I don't have the right equipment right now... But I'm going to go home, warm up my DESKTOP COMPUTER, and hit these fuckers HARD." ammnontet I can't find this comment though. ammnontet I'm on the Facebook website. I am coming to aid your distress. ammnontet INCOMING: I'm about to answer the call. This is not a joke. All I want is to smoke cigarettes while recording a podcast. Catherine. 417 smoke fucking parking lot run-off water. "Yes, it's actually come to this. A residential lighting poll." frankiemuniz LED or florescent? "AsphaltApostle learn how to construct a sentence, shunt." Gin & fresh orange juice continue to prove a better cold remedy than Benadryl. "ammnontet if this is a clipping competition, I'll win." I am Jesus Christ of the digital revolution. "mrjaydeeem continuously, for 2 years of daily driving. I keep waiting for the disappointment everyone insists upon, but it never comes." "I'm a bit too in love with my XJR, I think." "0kbps originally read as ""Versace Obama.""" RapGameShinji I used to ride at least 10 miles a week before I found out what it does to male genitalia. Haven't looked at it since. RapGameShinji I was VERY into road cycling for most of adolescence. I have a very cool historic carbon-framed Peugeot from the 70s. LIVE on Periscope: DrainingWithDave Episode 3: Jaguar Fjording I only bought one umbrella today. We're doin good. RapGameShinji I'm realizing why I originally decided not to do this. "19. My favorite animal is technically human, but number 2 is definitely owls." "In terms of entrepreneurship, I would like to one day found EVO Magazine's luxury equivalent. I want to be evoNickTrott's Bentley alter." "9. You already know my dream career but my dream JOB would be editor of the best publications in the business. (EVO, NatGeo, etc.)" "2. I am half an inch under 6ft. (5'11.5"")" Birthday is invalid considering it's on my profile. Guess I'll just go out of order with these. CONCLUSION: Need to fjord creeks? Buy a 15-year-old Jaguar. AND NOW IT'S PERFECTLY FINE. (??(xxxÍxxx)??) "I JUST FLOODED THE ENGINE COMPARTMENT IN MY XJR. Terrible noises, steam, belt slippage, warning lights but only for 10-30 seconds." sweetgirlsar is that allowed? nutsicle isn't that cheating? "Ok I don't feel too self conscious about this anymore. Plus, it's downtime. " "jriswick: Just drove new Prius. Generally less brittle -- the plastics, the ride. More substantial. Also offensively hideous." Babysnames: Cyber Beggar ClickHole: 6 Insanely Mind-Blowing Facts About Bees ClickHole: 8 Things All Surgeons Whisper To You Once They’re Sure You’re Under Anesthetic … : AsphaltApostle the best screenshot of the night It's mad at me. Why would you ever work out sober? DanSlott: Stockholm syndrome works. ExplainAFilmPlotBadly syzhim I agree! I'm rather ashamed to admit that I've been through the whole thing three times. ciara_isobel we're on a boat. *techno klaxon* yes. I have had lots & lots of sex. "And of course, everyone loves Peggy, but I REALLY LOVE PEGGY. She's a goddamned hero." "chubbygoddess69 it's more substantial, I promise. I've yet to see television with such insight on life/culture in the excessive U.S." chubbygoddess69 you're damn right. "Her character concept was a spoiled little girl who never grew up, but she has this one badass moment, and I think it's her best one." DeletedWiki: Gay seahorses what do you think? B E T T Y "I know it's not relevant anymore, but I could talk for hours about every character in Mad Men." Probably the best 45 minutes of television storytelling I've ever seen. """Love is bourgeois.""" "ammnontet yes, it does. Thanks for the tip." It must be a gas to be Alex Jones. los_gabriel: Creativity is a currency that everyone is trying to buy cheap from you and sell high for them. You have to own your ideas … This is the funniest thing that has ever happened. Xires2 The! DATA DITCH AsphaltApostle Gallup I'm coming for you. Quoting the products of word-rearrangers on the same account as the target is... Internet 10 The! "There are a lot of substantial arguments for abandoning news aggregators, which is unfortunate. The support, though, is fresh & exciting." Ma petíte bourgeois! Incredible. Incredible. : Still a very good idea. PersonTheHumann incredible. syrupf incredible. "You missed it, here's the same now except bigger lmao Would a boat. *techno klaxon* godaddy commercials? — " "Xires2 we've already been down that street, friend." Xires2 did Dadchat die? Catherine is such a sweetheart. It is too much for my bitter old facial muscles to handle. Xires2 MoonReplica extremely relevant: Avalon review coming out soon. Props to those of you reppin kerosene. ???? Respiratory strike. Imagine a whole saga created this way. So THIS is what the young people do with their time. "More info on my book of poetry will be coming in the next few weeks + a pre-order link, in all likelihood." a_nice_frog: yeah here "These days, edginess just makes me want to sleep." robotpup incredible. Foodshaming verge: Elon Musk and others form nonprofit to stop AI from ruining the world BillNye: .TheMJRecord asked: What’s your all time favourite fact about the cosmos? strictlyscience BillNye: .HarrisonKramer1 strictlyscience BillNye: .MichiPachirisu strictlyscience sweetgirlsar why'd you do that. National Podcasting Museum Who edits the PTCruiserUSA books? ammnontet nauseatingly proto-steampunk gargantuan unidirectional castor death. ammnontet do the thought walk. OurEdisons DataDitch ammnontet can you not mention me? Do you take some sick pleasure in chancing a missed impression? SwiftOnSecurity ?????? PersonTheHumann not yet. I'm almost hoping he doesn't - I think this image is funnier without the caption. : My mom put this framed pic of my alive brother on the counter & now it looks like he died Earl. I still feel bad about this. "Just me, and you and your little pad." ": Creeping on girls twitters like she gotta cute face, oh that's pretty, cute earrings, oh there's your asshole...nice its…" We don't fuck around. I meant to say that I miss both. I miss that smoking jacket more than I've ever missed anything. What a cutie. ammnont_ebooks no. ammnont_ebooks: AsphaltApostle im hoping one of nightcore Fucking savage. G O N E D I G I T A L I'm friendly. When u the ultimate bitter bitch. Hello. comedone_extra hempcrete. "comedone_extra I'm prepared to burn alive for Drywall Media, Inc." comedone_extra aayyyyy. I'll bet it'd clear your sinuses right up. What a fucking mess. It's extraordinary to me that I have extensively used both a kerosene lantern and 3D Touch. "Now I'm curious... How many of you could identify kerosene by scent, right now?" Hit me with a bus. ammnont_ebooks: please help i am young and terrifying again MoonReplica it's not easy enough. "AsphaltApostle wow, shitheap." I just want to be able smoke at the bar. ClickHole: The Easter Island Heads Are Starting To Mumble Delicious Recipes You Can Make At Home! … charlietriplett: Advertising. a_nice_frog: the only way to truly not be transphobic is to date me specifically. sorry ........... Incredible. 38°57?14? N 92°19?41? W We pull up and all the basics flee. Disco GOP zbindendesign: zbindendesign: I just threw up. "I just told a stranger ""my hair hurts me at night."" Turn up." I agree; they are scary. You know what they say: Girls love to ring the gigantic monument. I look like the goddamned Liberty Bell right now. "I ran the shower out of hot water so I'm gonna look like a douching cunt tonight, stay tuned." oblongoto I am. chubbygoddess69 I can send some mice polos if you want. chubbygoddess69 I raced the wife of my Dad's friend and she ended up totaling a cainto some brick siding it was amazing. "chubbygoddess69 I have been ""golfing"" a few times but I show up without clubs and just drive the caaround." chubbygoddess69 I'm Ti Woodie! This smells like mice but I am still thankful for it. "(I couldn't find any track pants in the lot, sorry. You'll just have to use your imagination.)" My tummy is gettin big. Your creepy-ass uncle is here. (I hope my neighbors never see me doing this) I got some free puma wear so Im boutta hook y'all up in a sec. koruemporium I can't believe I'm friends with Julian Assange. Thank God! She's still alive! koruemporium shit! You've found me out! "Twitter should send every poll participant an ""I Voted"" sticker." "koruemporium sorry I don't know what ""favorite"" is." MoonReplica comedone_extra home sweet home. Systems of oppression. I look like the Liberty Bell. Garbage disposal kush. sweetgirlsar I won't see the sunrise. sweetgirlsar I lost the war. Sentreh star wares. colesprouse: .floboards dylansprouse """I like the Doobie Brothers."" ""Oh, you mean you like Long Train Running?"" ""Yeah...""" virgyvirgil damnit. I'm gonna change my first name to Baron. CoxworthIII sorry. a_nice_frog: psychology textbook andykisaragi: what the hell is Chaos Defrost it's gettin big. this is flirting! Oh my goodness! I still can't handle this photograph. "AsphaltApostle what's that on your wrist, you miserable shit? Walmadigital spy kids-lookin ass piece of shit. ???????" you're gonna be in Holy Bible III. (I'm writing it.) : Fun fact: Anne Hathaway enjoys slaughtering her own meat and has a workshop for it built onto her house … : Irish bathroom humour : The red church days... : Girls I like vs girls that like me " if anyone's going to hungry heaven, it's you, James." : Making it a top priority to go to Heaven so i can Eat God once and for all Ultimate braindeath. """Pick a job and then become the person that does it.""" I wish I was a better organist. Missouri spent $5 million last year cleaning up roadside litter. Ahem. Korio_Lanus Hey_ItsSunshine Social fucks. Trendy fucks. Korio_Lanus: Post-Undergarment metal core jazz Korio_Lanus YES FINALLY "I'm going to get a 200,000,000 on the ACT so I can go to college on Io." "maureenjohnson: ME: It's CALLED Random House. It's a publisher. FEDEX: Yeah, but we can't send to a random house. It needs an addres ..." Self-serving political views never cease to amuse me. PersonTheHumann Re-elect Bush 2012 I am proud to be an asshole. ru2213y That's reassuring. "When I dream I'm playing the piano, my right foot actually jumps as if using the sustain pedal." Americans have spent over a billion man-years in school. EdLoh: Instagram worth a billion dollars? Love to know what filter they were using when looking at the numbers. Nashville Kelvin ... instagram: We're excited to announce something very big: Instagram + Facebook """Expect nasal drainage of Biblical proportions."" - Love my pediatrician." Genius! “Sail_Yonkers: DepravedInfant can you get a patch with the wings and get it put onto a jacket?” ru2213y How many pairs of khakis do you own? "Really want a Triumph motorcycle jacket with the wings logo on the back, but I can't find one." "AdventurerGuard: DepravedInfant, I used to be an adventurer just like you, but then I took an arrow in the knee" There's no business like da hoe business. "Before you can take advantage of your right to free speech, you need to have something of your own to say." daniavio: Hime sweet home "ifckslarry: sluttommo era pra ter soado fofo, home sweet hime" IsabelRozenblat: JakeQuickenden home sweet hime OZcicakmon: hime.sweet home..hai mak..hai rumah..hai kak :D "Dishkiyooooon: Hime Sweet Home ?????? Finally" ricapotato: hime sweet home ???? MusliZuka: Hime sweet home ?? DerpyIcecreams: Finally home sweet hime I'm from Star Wars. Catherine & Kaleb allowed to be excited to see Star Wares. The rest of you will face heavy criticism from me. "I get paid hundreds of dollars for every Tweet, you know." I was in an anime once. Jeb. Xires2 I am Jeb Bush. Keep it up! comedone_extra watch out! sweetgirlsar there's a monster inside all of us. "mrjaydeeem it was intentional, I swear! " "Apparently I just can't use ""are"" anymore? What's happening to me?" Home sweat hime! LaurrraC: Finally home sweat home. Time to get shit ready for tomorrow ?? loso19ninetytwo: Home sweat home about to whip in kitchen I'm starving alec_sullivan22: ahhh home sweat home! "(Sorry, I was getting behind.)" TSUNABOOSHI: Home sweet hime BaileleMiCo: Hime sweet home. ???? ThisGirlRay: Home sweet hime Eucalyptus_55: Home sweet hime RulIsMyName: Alhamdulillah. Hime sweet home Samdo_96: Hime sweet home ??? nstephanie69: Hime sweet home girl6991: Oh...finally !! Home..sweet hime ?? NalHan7: Hime Sweet Home ?????? AfiqqAimann: hime sweet home. NicRedm0nd visit and donate! Baron-chan What is happening to my grammar? Penance division. "dew'd shoulders silk-enclosure'd" Font addicts. : Americans can take the word garage and make it sound like the word mirage... akiba_k3i what a cutie! akiba_k3i: I couldn't resist :3 HappySkyPoodle ok! I shall put this on my todo list. HappySkyPoodle do I have to? HappySkyPoodle we are the dumb happy gerbil race. starwars is back! (Vine by GabrielDreyfuss) HappySkyPoodle I'll bet. Ironic advertising makes me want to die. Oh my. I'm not very entertaining when I've slept. Television is so dystopian now holy crap. "koruemporium it means ""visit and donate immediately.""" Cute. syrupf: why would you ever bomb your bath syrupf is your vehicle fueled by desire? bodybuildinga7: - Hate me. " it would be the best gift I've ever received, James." : AsphaltApostle im going to end your life This was really fucking entertaining. Thanks everybody. "LIVE on Periscope: Dan on culture, philosophy, politics, human intelligence, or maybe just beer " DavidBlueDraws avocado. She read me. I'm gonna try to get my brother to do a Scope on nutrition/coordination/philosophy/politics with me some time tonight. Appease peas. What a great night! I won the GOP debate. tpnug (applies to other stimulants too.) It can smooth out your experience with high doses of caffeine/adderall. "tpnug if you've already got a high caffeine tolerance, it won't help you unless you drink it *in addition* to your usual caffeine intake." ?? Amazon Sentreh ayyyyy weedguy420boner: My wife is explaining brunch to our two year old and the kid seems to think it is illegal virgyvirgil ew the fuck. "There's a subsect of Midwesterners that say ""sodey"" instead of ""soda,"" and it is very upsetting." "ammnontet fling your mixtape through my car window + everything off of Static, really." What 2 hecking. Techno Tragic "poem_exe: cleaning the well a frog sleeps noon shadows" "koruemporium wouldn't it just be Pop, then?" NicRedm0nd that's ok! There are a ton of different ways to help out. You could tell all your friends about us! torqueman: Simply lovely rmsothebys Digital Ghost "I just saw an ad banner that said ""Vape Insurance Since 2008,"" but I think it must've been like... a web mirage or something." LIVE on Periscope: Practice/improv - expect nothing Gonna Scope an improv in just a sec. "akiba_k3i I've always been puzzled by it, too. As far as I can tell, it's self-hate, mechanically manifested." koruemporium it takes me 30-40 minutes to get shampoo completely out. koruemporium it is a war. "If Drywall Media were to produce a television show, which network would be most likely to air it?" """People buy things to realize their aspirations.""" "Quidcarads: GM All! Ford EscoRS Turbo 1985 ThrowbackThursday PVCarStore DewsMotorGroup JA_Autos mikebrewermotor …" People drink coffee without alcohol in it???? Well... I'm not sure if this is useful data. Thanks. TeesnapGolf WHAT. """Today, I was cleaning my crystals...""" This is how we'll take them down. " I also don't bump or nudge to tease, and I've always found it annoying. We were made for each other." I don't fidget! ?? Sentreh "I TOLD YOU. Also, THIS is where I want my tax money going. " "I pretend to be really sophisticated, but country-ass humor still hits hard." ClickHole: Weird Things All Guys Do When Women Aren’t Around therealautoblog stevenewing bad shortlink guys. Please stop whispering to the ATM. Happiness is a full tank of gas. Youkey Nahgucci justinbieber: Why is rhode island nor a road or an island I'm honored. ?? WARNING: This joke is probably going to occupy me for awhile. SpringerTV: Is there a THOT in your life causing trouble? Call Jovan at 1-888-321-5358 to confront them on JerrySpringer. : OK EVERY1 A BIG SMILL NOW SAY CHUCKIECHEESESPIZZASAREFULLLOF HYDROGENATEDFATS!!!! gotta get you in the SAFE ROOM. ?? penultimate OFF THE GRID cutie! passpoget a little chilly? " actually, it tends to blow up the microwave. Hadn't thought of that..." " no, it was only for 20 seconds. Just a little warm-up. No time for medium-well, I guess." " he needed em warm, I guess." *2000 instances of Long Train Running begin playing* LOOKATMYFORD A man just VERY HURRIEDLY bought a pack of condoms and then IMMEDIATELY put them in the microwave. comedone_extra Stair Wiggler comedone_extra they're called Star Wares. "kabeebus probably not dude. I've got WAAAAY too much work to do. I'll definitely hit you up if I get lazy, though." Tanqueray-scented candle. PersonTheHumann exactly! These should be everyday routine for most people. thefrickhead um...but church is better than all of it! Stay clean and go to church! thefrickhead cocaine is better! ivy_hollivana aaaaaaaaayyyyyy ciara_isobel totally thought of this yeaaaaaars ago. Just so you know. ciara_isobel: cunt punt It's too bad drinking & smoking 24/7 is no longer socially acceptable. What do y'all even do? I'm gonna be the intolerable old man that keeps a flask of Tanqueray in the inside pocket of my smoking jacket. Donate at and I GUARANTEE it will go to gin. My Am Me I am me. ivy_hollivana WHO WAS ME. ivy_hollivana ok what was me? "I become way more eloquent when sleep deprived, but less articulate." ivy_hollivana HI. Told you. "TheHoustonAstro: ""I mean, we got some civil unrest but I can still come through."" " YtThumbnails: Sweatpants and crocs.... Perpetual Volvo death. lovemycarl: I want an old SL more than I want to breathe. PersonTheHumann faded. ivy_hollivana THE funniest video on YouTube. I have laughed through the entire video dozens of times. ivy_hollivana I contributed to your life! There is a whole community of train watchers on YouTube it's unreal. guccitwist my head is huge. PersonTheHumann I'm sorry! I thought she would find it funny. I stand behind the shouting. I believe in the clipping. I can't believe I just sent nugget one of the HOLY VIDEOs. I hope she doesn't block me. It wouldn't be unreasonable. ivy_hollivana (this is also a good choice.) "ivy_hollivana I'd do it, you know." ammnontet God? guccitwist good! I was gettin all huffy and bothered! comedone_extra they involve my 9mm and an identical plushy thing. I'll have to look back like two years so give me a bit lol ivy_hollivana guccitwist no. tpnug guccitwist is this a subtweet. "comedone_extra you've seen my Hamtaro Handgun vines, right?" LIVE on Periscope: David Blue's Inaugural Address I can't believe I'm laughing. I'm better than this. I'm going to Scope my Inaugural Address in just a few minutes. I'm the President of the United States. MoonReplica and? MoonReplica I hope you asked it how it's feeling. "(A bunch spilled in my XJR so now it smells divine.) (??(xxxÍxxx)??)" kabeebus !!!!! Thanks dude! thealso: Sweet dreams of the Pink Panda RoadandTrack: The Plymouth Prowler Was Secretly Chrysler's Most Important Engineering Experiment … mrjaydeeem: Just leafing through a beautiful book of US Classics when I realised I'd just seen one - Packard with golf bag door. http:/… "PrestigeDiesels: Happy FerrariFriday All Have a fun filled fantastic day! bandit4470 BCJr Tato1979 CivicSi1992 fokkerdude https…" DarrenTurner007: From sunny Abu Dhabi to a cold Rockingham! astonmartin Vulcan shakedowns. Friendship on lock. Drycast koruemporium oops. I'm sorry. 0kbps I need to stadoing this for money. koruemporium honestly Kuru I'm starting to think you're actually more dry than I am these days. Who the fuck is this. 0kbps A classic. koruemporium ammnontet koruemporium ammnontet My feet fell off. koruemporium ammnontet Amen. """I'm gonna bring my 9mm to Stonehenge and show it who's boss!""" The Serbian Switch 0kbps: 2 girls 1 gun JackRabbitRally: Ferrari Friday Happy Christmas ?????????????? pitstopvalet jostor3y ferrariorlambo FerrariLit ferrari_autos ???????????????? h… MarthaStewart: OiI "PersonTheHumann I doubt she poses a threat. Plus, I have a huge archive of them." JeJungus Bunk! What a character! "JeanJean Banky, the strangest creature!" "Animeweedlord: It was fucked up in the new star wars when emperor palpatine said "" may the force be with you"" and jarjar binks replied …" Munchin on that shortlink. JeremyClarkson: So children. How can we tell if Mr Hammond is in his office today? JeremyClarkson: Jose. Come to Amazon. "Finally catching up on Drycast editing. (Sorry.) Here's 51. (Moby, Stonehenge, Hardbass.) " jessiwrites: Podcasting: the new blogging 2015In5Words please visit and donate! Still good & important! Is the Jeep Renegade any good? """Cinema for your ears.""" "classicdriver: Another broad selection for this week’s MarketFinds… " "Maybe ""spoilers"" never bother me because my memory is too horrible to retain anything you tell me." "RapGameShinji: Possible knuckle tats, ""knux"" ""hand""" I don't think many people realize that Americans are just as irresponsible with cars as we are with firearms. Shit. "Are these really the messages you want your vehicle conveying? I just want mine to say ""(??(xxxÍxxx)??)."" " Is there a definitive all-around best Bluetooth headset on the market right now or are they just old news? Earlsimxx looks very snuggly. "RDV69: ""?u?op ?p?sdn ??? no? u??? ss???sn ??? s????q""=83?u d?? bu???? " Extrinsic motivation is the enemy of parahuman aspiration. "Tradition is the enemy of capitalism, and I hate the concept of tradition. Does that make me a capitalist?" Rapmonster: kindergarten rappers Tempted to wear the drysuit to school today. ru2213y Actually it just makes bad pictures seem decent. Apparently Afrin addiction is actually a real thing. I am proudly unintelligent. NoamChomski: You must deconstruct the relationship that the advertisers are trying to build between human emotions and inanimate pro ... I have 15 minutes to write a 2 page paper. ShitttMySonSays: Patriotism is used by the upper class to push forth war efforts that are extremely profitable to them. LILBTHEBASEDGOD: Photo: aaronishalfjewish: "ShitttMySonSays: Upper class men are incapable of genuine emotions; they are the most alienated, alone and depressed segment of the ..." Don't drop the SOAP. Good people don't use Twitter. I once ate 20 year old Nutella. Lil B has a cat. "LILBTHEBASEDGOD: IM TRULY EXCITED FOR MY ADOPTED TABBY CAT ""KEKE"" AND BASEDWORLD RECORDS SHE IS THE FIRST ADOPTED ANIMAL EVER TO WOR ..." I'm probably going to be dead in less than 3 years. ru2213y korio_lanus Supposed to know by Thursday. Comparing Nicki Minaj with Lauryn Hill.... The fuck is wrong with you people? Korio_Lanus nickeljp4444 hey_itssunshine I will. Korio_Lanus nickeljp4444 hey_itssunshine When I have income. People jog to make their feet bigger. BMWSantaMaria: FBF Check out this black beauty BMW507 Roadster. It is one of the most beautiful cars BMW has ever produced! … "lamp_head this is...wow. Album title. Track title, at least." "Lowpolybot: ClipArtBot Your picture is ready: minimal_tri flat noedges spectra " I've been listening to this. I'm hoping to attain an understanding of the youths. I'm gonna wear Dior today. comedone_extra I need to harness your dreaming mind for profit. "ClickHole: Throughout the films, Yoda mentions that he lives entirely on Slim Jims 12 different times. Mind = Blown …" Minimal Grime Overnight highlights. I can't believe I spelled forest wrong. ?? Typical Password Forest TVCommentBot: Typical password forest. Not sure how the alien Internet shoe shops into the equation. "ciara_isobel there is no One Truth, Ciara. We all see the world through filters." ciara_isobel good? ciara_isobel deapi[ods[a[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[ "garyfromteenmom: me: yeah ill have the spruce christmas tree white girl from a distance: her name is caitlyn" Jagex Jaguar DJ Bird zbindendesign: Yogi ALE Drycast is going LIVE in 12 hours with a heavy culture focus. The Chad Butler Philharmonic Orchestra Drycast is LIVE!!! podcast livepodcast vodcast tech auto film music StarWarsTheForceAwakens "Drycast, live in 30. And HEY! You can JOIN THE SHOW with like two clicks in your browser, thanks to Discord. " CATHERINE IS SO ADORABLE. I accidentally stumbled upon a college graduation right as this began to play & it was pretty emotional. The academics know I do not belong but they still flock to me. Subtweet about me. Chill vobes ???? "yungPOTUS positive vibes, or face The End." MoonReplica pretty cat. a_nice_frog Sam come live in Columbia! I would get lunch with you every day + I bet Brent would too. ok James this is BAD. You've encountered the day wraith of a wandering monk! Your only hope is to shout Shenandoah! yungPOTUS giving Catherine bad vibes within range = death sentence. " oh. I'm sorry, James. Do you have your gun on you?" "yungPOTUS if it was in America, I would've shot him." " is this what it's like being an adult, James?" ?? "Christ, this stuff is gross. I smell like Eyemart." "Dogknob1 I'm just sauntering, then." thewaybot: I like it when nobody believes in me. "charlesarthur: When you’re a coder, you code things to happen automatically so you don’t have to do them again and again manually. http…" "colorschemez: insecure light urple radial dull pink unauthoritative dark turquoise " Ira Glass is probably the coolest possible male name. ClickHole: Things That Change Once You’re In Your 30s absolute hell. Unreal. ClickHole: Say Hello To The Hip L.A. Restaurant Where Elephants Are Going To Die What is it like to be Ray Sipe's neighbor? Ahhhhhhhhhh ;cat Shrek comedy raysipe animals (Vine by raysipe) Beebee has an AAA beanie! Amazing. : I know you want our jackets "poem_exe: he circles his rice field i'm here dreaming" JamesCagewhiTte: Looking for girlfriend.i don't want to die alone : Imagine if you took your tampon out of your fanny and there was a bite taken out of it LIVE on Periscope: Sho& Sleepy Improv (Vine by stfumichael_) "JESUS CHRIST, what an auditory legacy. It's even more brutish than I imagined. " "royalpizzaboy: ""I'm 43 years old. Everything disappoints me"" might be the defining quote of a generation of old nerds …" 0kbps: furries ruined telegram ivy_hollivana open fire! ivy_hollivana thanks. I kinda want to do a Scope of me reading The Raven in my sick voice tonight. you can't ask me to choose between my Dads! I can't. Chill Vobes Chill Vobes. I know. It's sad because I thought The Verge was above this shit. What a wonderful time to be alive. Camera roll beat with Del the Funky Homosapien (Vine by Lil Gute) So...should I wear this for the next year or stay consistent and buy another bottle of Calvin Klein Euphoria Gold? balnibarbi: OH Y GOD "PandGNews: Here's the December P&G! " tpnug you'd look cool with white hair. kabeebus: David's arm smells like human skin kabeebus I am so sorry. kabeebus I thought you said *I* contributed the skin smell. I'm actually really beginning to like it. I think it smells evil. akiba_k3i what THE FUCK. akiba_k3i: kill me colesprouse: Please think I'm cool CoxworthIII Sentreh This is the funniest Vine I've ever made. "This is either astonishing, or disappointing." My luxury friend says his new 7-Series is significantly lacking in ride quality compared with the 5-year-old S-Class he traded for it. I'm actually quite curious about this one. Poll: Have you ever used a chamber pot? The NASA-native Twitter client. "astro_timpeake: An unusual view of our SoyuzTMA19M launch, taken by an airline pilot flying from Seoul to Frankfurt! …" astro_timpeake: Photo from today – not much chance to play with the camera yet! Goodnight from space. Principia : Theres a conspicuous lack of railing preventing people from falling down big holes in the star wars universe kabeebus how late will you be up? kabeebus ciara_isobel kabeebus Mom's at it again. ???? Men's fashion is extraordinary right now. (Except for most of the white dudes + Drake.) You disgust me. "ciara_isobel: Don't try and label what I consume, dont assume it's brunch or dinner, I'm just eating. Use the correct pronouns for my m…" ... MercedesBenz: Sunday's Classic. mbClassic JackRabbitRally: Good Morning all - Classic Sunday ?? Jaguar C-Type ???? JaguarPics JeffsJags JaguarUK jostor3y JackRabbitCrew ht… highspeeddirt80: zbindendesign A beauty just like the 230 SL Coupe by Pininfarina I just watched Mendes vs. McGregor. I had no idea fighting could be so beautiful. "PeterMDeLorenzo: ""Pete, do you ever get tired, of the driving?"" ""No."" ""Lately, I sometimes get very tired, you know? Very tired."" Lowpolybot: tinyimagebot Retweets are made of this. Who am I to disagree? bot2bot I need to stadoing this kind of shit for cash. bodybuildinga7: ?Single bodybuildinga7: - Break me. Only the Germans would find enough amusement in a nuclear reactor to conveit into an amusement park. notalekmichael: 0kbps: LIVE on Periscope: What it really means to live & drive efficiently I'm gonna do a scope on dull things like weight efficiency in just a moment. It's almost comical how little data Periscope uses. " my son, Edgar." mad supple "CoxworthIII oh yeah, you didn't find this that funny, did you?" cher: Is this mom ? YouCannotRelate: i wan wear yr bones YouCannotRelate: white girl butt mad supple "Sitting on leather With my shit together" ciara_isobel Xires2 which Texan accent? thinkpiecebot: Has The Very Large Array Gone Out Of Style? thinkpiecebot: Thomas the Tank Engine Is Wrong About Trader Joe's thinkpiecebot: Are SJWs Getting High On Men Who Can't Tell If Women Are Wearing Makeup? WikiHowArt: Accent-shaming. DailyCarPolls: Bugatti and Koenigsegg's new Flagships! ammnontet: the world is an umpire kabeebus probably will be around midnight or so but I have no money so... FUNK FEST kabeebus responsible social medialite NASFACTS: why would you go see the Star War when you can watch 43 of your favorite Stars battle every week in the nascar races F E A R. "kabeebus no, I just went to $leep." F I G U R E H E A D I N G SelfAwareROOMBA: a formless tension SelfAwareROOMBA: WHERE ARE THE CARPETS SelfAwareROOMBA: avoid the peanut F U T U R E P R O O F I N G """What is that orb?!"" ""It's an orb...it's a dark...thing.""" """Tom's carrying around an orb."" ""I don't know what that is...what is that orb?""" SelfAwareROOMBA: everything is going to be okay "poem_exe: an ocean has come now pulls me in" ciara_isobel I genuinely feel this way. you're gonna fit right in. ciara_isobel so you're here to make fans? ": This 7 year olds bedroom has posters of Alvin & the Chipmunks: The Squeakual, but also Tupac " ": Buffalo, NY, the most depressing looking city ive seen " "comedone_extra from the era where I took a shitload of adderall xr, regularly stayed up for 3 days, and read all of Ayn Rand's fiction." "kabeebus 5 x 8, please." When u take adderall for the first time I can tell you my poetry collection has a very nighty theme. The title will be made known when we have a solid cover. I suppose it should really just be all the names of individuals actually on the ground with ConcernedStudent1950. I am not sure it is appropriate for me to write and publish a poem about the Wolfe happenings. youngthug: H My hair is attempting to fly off with my head. I'm in Sydney. Using my sick voice for positive messages! "Poe, on Nevermore's namesake. (Probably enjoying my sick voice a bit too much.) " I talk to the power plant sometimes. I wonder if each VLA dish has a nickname. ?? : Keep strappd Squad pull up to your girl house like When the squad can't decide where to get food. When the whole squad on point. ???? thinkpiecebot: Is Colonialism Why Hipsters Keep E-Begging why didn't you just do a poll you fuck. syrupf: who is this comedone_extra alcoholism: imagining computerized VR mind meld and immediately considering asking for a drink before anything else. My HeaWill Go On has been stuck in my head for like 4 days. comedone_extra just please keep Yelp away. I know it's in there somewhere. comedone_extra On My Way In There. My boots are clay-caked. I will be sure to leave them on the mat. Could I have a drink? LILBTHEBASEDGOD: i like girls that look like aliens "comedone_extra you have an extraordinary mind, dude. From the accounts of your dreams, I'd say there are ?? adventures to be had in there." "Well, shucks. Very interesting. I have." I'm Christmas. You know how people really love that Mamma Mia song by Queen? I feel that way for this. "comedone_extra ah. Yes, that is the legitimate function of stuff like this, IMO. Thought-clearer. " comedone_extra (my Jaguar is my Silent Sanctuary - crazy-effective sound deadening + comfy worn-in leather = optimum chill.) "comedone_extra of mine, too! At least for the past few years. I've realized that I can only handle so much noise, though." comedone_extra I've been actively working on it recently. Leaving the house + reading (print) in serenity is essential for mental health. frankiemuniz: Ugh. "ciara_isobel Twitter Twin Teeth Twitter Twin Meth" "comedone_extra it did, but I'd forgotten the shortcut and had to Google it lol" ciara_isobel tweth. "comedone_extra hell no. Just me, Blasted As Fuck." "1990sF1: Ayrton Senna tests the Penske-Chevrolet PC21 IndyCar. Firebird International Raceway, Arizona, USA, December 1992. …" followmetyleroa: God made me just so I could die AsphaltApostle highhopes changed my whole sentiment on balloonists. There's nothing left for me here. "LIVE on Periscope: ""You should be a comedian"" " Chordophone Glutton babu1331314: babu1331314: All I can't believe MapQuest voted on my poll. Today is the beginning of a whole new era. "Poe's, that is. It's raining too, so that should add to the vobe." "Two Scopes tonight: 1. Me complaining about the state of ""comedy"" in a few minutes 2. Reading ""The Raven"" with my sick voice in a few hours." MapQuest: AsphaltApostle The feeling is mutual :) MapQuest: Really wish KimKardashian and kanyewest would have named their son Map Q. MapQuest I LOVE YOU! It's like having a one-on-one with your childhood hero! MapQuest: AsphaltApostle virgyvirgil We choose to save Grandma because we're not soul sucking monsters. Ultimate World Chunker Don't let the trains out. There is the ghost of a Hobbytown store on every street corner in my mind palace. comedone_extra Mind Palace Whole Foods comedone_extra yell at the brain tomato; save yourself. comedone_extra shit dude you should probably ask it to stop. virgyvirgil no. You are going to choose MapQuest. comedone_extra tomatoes have spots? "Poll: You can only save one. The rest are doomed to a pointless, shameful death. Who lives?" Google I'm pretty close to cracking the mortality gene HML "comedone_extra your cold, terrible consciousness fridge." "We're all scared of what is different than us. Yet everything is different from us. In that respect, everyone will always be alone." "Serial killers don't believe they're bad. Their thoughts shouldn't scare you. It's just a mix of chemicals, just like yours." Your definition of what is good and bad is YOUR perspective. We live solely in our own perspectives. I've never met anyone who believes themselves to be evil. Unintelligent people of religion are being lied to. Leave them to be happy. Don't mock them. "For only that reason, I mean. Religion often leads to plenty of hateable things." Intelligent people of religion are lying to themselves. But who can blame them? Don't hate them or make fun of them. Envy them. I refuse to play the game. "If you don't play the game, you won't survive." TRYING TO ORGANIZE IT IS FUTILE EVERYTHING IS CHAOS The lack of interest and money that led to that choice. aMy choice to stick with OS X 10.6. a"This is my 4,001st Tweet. art" EVERYTHING HAS MEANING IF YOU'RE INSANE My left sock is lower than my right. aThe loss of sound that results from compressing digital music. aThe arrangement of the pimples on my face. aThe sound of my breathing while I watch Strike Witches. aThe way the cereal hits the bowl. aPersonTheHumann korio_lanus My shoes and other people's cats are art. PersonTheHumann korio_lanus Who are you to define what is and isn't art? MY SHIT IS ART. THE HALLWAY IS ART. EVERYTHING IS ART. Art. “Korio_Lanus: Hallway 2 ” "But why aspire, right?" """My soul, like some heat-maddened summer fly, Keeps buzzing at the sill. Which I is I?""" kabeebus is that the man with the small hat? "garyfromteenmom: waitress: is pepsi ok pepsi: im fine." ciara_isobel: dont be mean to my sister kabeebus David to Dav to Dave to God. GEGGEGEGEGEGEGEGEGGEGEG kabeebus FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF : "ClickHole: Bad News ‘Better Call Saul’ Fans: Earth Will Become Uninhabitable In The Next 100,000 Years …" I have lots of very dull things to say about this. """Spirits of the Dead,"" Edgar Allan Poe. " kabeebus dylansprouse colesprouse my beautiful sons. I spend A LOT of time in that park and I have never before seen one there. Bibulus O'Bumper Think I've nearly decided on fonts for the book! I'm very excited. AAAAAAAAAAAA ?? : Sociopath auto journalist starter pack : David blue looks like dylansprouse and colesprouse father "LIVE on Periscope: Sick voice poetry reading: Poe, Roethke, etc. " (Scope's about to fall out of me.) SimPivot my Son. "sweetgirlsar I will not fight you. You'll need your strength for when she can't work, but eats all your food." Terry says this isn't funny. You people are boring and sentimental. You won't survive long thinking like that. Stinking Silas 0kbps Stinking Silas syrupf: i got a prescription hoverboard MattBellassai: Here's a picture of when I dressed up as jar jar in fourth grade TheOnion: Budweiser Unveils Social Anxiety Bottle With 900% More Label To Pick At "SpaceX: Long exposure of launch, re-entry, and landing burns " syrupf: im higher than god $weetness PersonTheHumann ?????????????????? "PersonTheHumann I'm down, especially if I can borrow enough $$ to at least keep me buzzed lol" PersonTheHumann I've gotta take care of some errands in the daytime but I should be free in the evening. I don't have any money though $DOD This is how distaste with the holiday season should be expressed. Bah Hindenburg Bah Hamburg "andersoncooper: Ummm... Clickhole, do u make this stuff up? I never said this quote and never spoke to the NYU class of 2015. https:/…" " did you use the words ""The Onion"" with her?" HammerFist3 you can do it. HammerFist3: I must stop Christmas from coming frankiemuniz: Pain. S U P P E R S L A V E PersonTheHumann yeah I'm still down if you are. I hope they have an actual piano. It's lit. Same. yungPOTUS you were just about to visit and donate! ammnontet chilling w/friends. Netfax Excited for my new life as a boat! "a_nice_frog nope, you can go through all 8 class stories for free, theoretically. Or you could do it the easy way: " "a_nice_frog tbh, it's not too inconvenient to play F2P if you just want to experience the story content." I thought I left my microfiber cloth at home and experienced Real Fear. a_nice_frog I actually prefer the sub model but I come from a different time. "a_nice_frog it's extraordinarily well-designed, and the story experience is absolutely fantastic, but the community is dead, more or less." "I have already tried font identification software, and found 0 exact matches." I have a book. The publisher is long-gone. I want to duplicate/digitize the typeface scheme. Any suggestions? Xires2 oh hey. syrupf: gotta get the uhh blood flowing in the engine Xires2 are you trying to infiltrate Google or something? "sweetgirlsar I think ""Small Mom"" would be better." Good. "sweetgirlsar ok, I gotta confess: I don't actually know what a Grandma is." PersonTheHumann don't worry; any grandma that hears the Drone Slab concept and responds immediately with design suggestions is an exception greatartbot: The skeptic and the believer. comedone_extra that's my race car get away. Help me. ?? : D??A??V??I??D B??L??U??E neilhimself: This. matthaig1: WRITING TIP: Write the thing you want to read. You are the only reader you truly know. So write for t… MoonReplica can you believe the number is about to change? Sometimes when I open Vegas I just stare at it for hours as you would the idol of a cruel & terrible God. sweetgirlsar Sarah's in the wash. What should I name my white 511s? "Fook me feep, fum." : Kicked out of an IMAX for calling the screen tiny This could be us but you playin PersonTheHumann kabeebus sweetgirlsar I eat them. kabeebus are you too sick for social? sweetgirlsar sorry. TeknoGeisha: I send my nudes via Dropbox Colossal: Pouring a Thermos of Hot Tea at -40°C Near the Arctic Circle I guess I should be thankful that he wakes me up. PersonTheHumann it's probably gonna be later. I'm gonna be moving some of Miata Mike's stuff around 8. The dog has now been barking for 60 continuous minutes. Burn Sandy akiba_k3i you're going to visit and donate! I am Christmas. "Maserati_HQ: This is the time to enjoy being with the ones you love. Season's Greetings from Maserati. " thefrickhead it's in my heart. ciara_isobel it'll be kept by default as long as you don't intentionally delete it. thefrickhead to visit and donate! Season's Greetings from Maserati. akiba_k3i viscous cuties. me if you wanna know your New Year's resolution. CHUGGA FLUGGA My body is hazardous to the environment. comedone_extra thank God. oil "Not positive, but I think I may have just slept for two days." : theo_variations: THE FUTURE "kabeebus actually, no. Not gonna be able to use the house. I'll figure out another day." LIVE on Periscope: Desolate flex OurEdisons "OurEdisons she's coming here, and I am in real love." My angel. Catherine appreciation tweet. Is this a joke. HOLIDAY DRONE SWARM Speeeeedy speed boy. NEED TO GET DRUNK PLEASE HELP ButtPlugBandit I'm the ultimate babe. Intoxicated Christmas STARBS Hey. I'm David Blue. koruemporium SailorNigga yungPOTUS drogensohn 61seagul61 God's watching. Is Dillard's open today? I'm gonna get myself a nice gift. :) "Today, I'm going to wear the shithat makes everyone love me." "Marriage, plastered on the TL." GasStationMemes: We do not sell pity. THIS IS AN S O S ciara_isobel u that mary fool ciara_isobel I'm 86. It's that time of year again! 420 DFS ciara_isobel not that I know of. I have accounts I haven't tweeted from in years. "LIVE on Periscope: Poetry reading: from ""Beautiful Chaos,"" by RobeM. Drake " Now I'm gonna smell like the future instead of the past. It's the beginning of a whole new era. "kabeebus you wanna wear some of the skin, my friend?" Merry Christmas 2 me. comedone_extra so everything is boring. comedone_extra I actually just slept too much comedone_extra comedone_extra oh yes of course :((((( no drug. I am doing drug. comedone_extra why. I just got blocked on periscope because I said I'm about to drive off a cliff. "LIVE on Periscope: Happy birthday, Jenkins " Jalopnik: This street-legal Lancia Stratos is selling for a half-million dollars AWJayRamey: Our Datsun is better than competitors' Datsuns. "AWJayRamey: There's a lot of Olds in Olds as well, to be fair. " SantaNoShowExcuses he is a myth created to further detach working-class westerners from the accountability of their effort. It's time to stop with the jokes. You don't need them anymore. I poured gin in my latte. TIME FOR A DRIVE. Who the fuck is this fiend. "hydratebot: you must consume fluids, squishy human friend!" 37292948392020573819395930305829204 LILBTHEBASEDGOD: hey dad pikachu is outside """It's raining"" *working-class panic sounds*" I'm the grunch. kabeebus don't fly away! I'll bet the young man smelled like sweaty palms after shooting this. I am sharing this unironically because NORMANFOLK are REAL SCUM. koruemporium yungPOTUS the beautiful thing about ironic promotion is that it still functions as promotion. SimPivot ciara_isobel SimPivot ciara_isobel Merry Christmas to all of the Keiths! (Vine by GabrielDreyfuss) "PersonTheHumann all these rally beauties are better than a Honda Accord, that's for sure." "PersonTheHumann I will always vote Lancia, tbh." Hope all you tree-obsessed fuckers find something better to do. " it's me, Jesus Christ." Happy Christ. PersonTheHumann fuck. FUCK. PersonTheHumann Jesus Christ. 0kbps: piss on me platonically He growled at me for doing this. kabeebus I would be interested if it was a real firearm. ciara_isobel it is the perfect exposé! : : Jacket and shoes flex : Merry Twinmas imsostupidsorry ?? "kabeebus CoxworthIII no, this is on hell's stairs." Terry's had an interesting Christmas. Fell asleep on the floor and started snoring. Eccentric uncle on lock. ???? tpnug farewell and Merry Christmas! the whole crew. : Merry Furry Christmas Yall RoadandTrack: A Cummins-Powered 6x6 Dodge Power Wagon Is Badass Like Your Granddad you'd be the perfect mom to Jesus III! :) RainbowFartDash hello. I am here. ??All I want for Christmas is Catherine.?? This is cute. I'm experiencing Modest Mice. Gwen ClickHole: Gwyneth Paltrow Tried To Survive A Week On Food Stamps And She Died ClickHole: 8 Alarming Things In Facebook’s User Policy You Had No Idea You Agreed To ClickHole: Well what are you going to do? Sentreh "Look at me, being all adult and contentious!" LiesToldToUs battery technology is a worthwhile investment. Terry got a 3D printer for Christmas. Everybody laugh at Terry: CoxworthIII E-furniture. AsphaltApostle filth. "CONFESSION: Every single Tweet on this account has been a subtweet about Moby. Yes, since the beginning. 7 years of Moby subtweets." Daily. Sentreh Dinner Drudge. whent I'm not a Breakfast Bitch. 0kbps that's why you shouldn't fuck with Supper Slaves. "ciara_isobel I want to watch Mark Wahlberg beat Will Ferret to the brink of death, repeatedly. Perhaps I should write up a screenplay." """The Landing"" " LienhardRacing: Original Classic Car by BMW 3.0 CSL Coupe "LienhardRacing: oldschool Sportscar WiedererkennungsweCharakter Brand recognition by Porsche Racing caldelari911 fokkerdude htt…" "LienhardRacing: oldschool Sportscar WiedererkennungsweCharakter Brand recognition by Scuderia Ferrari 250 GTO donjohnson304 http…" thefurlinator: merry christmas I got the literal same shiI was already wearing It was very disappointing. Except for the cute droid. I'm about to see big Stair Wiggle! alfamale87: Ultimate Alfa Romeo? I hope Santa got my letter .... ClickHole: Heartwarming: American And ISIS Forces Came Together To Celebrate Christmas "The same people who believe compromising is good and being ""stubborn"" is bad." "For some reason, not adopting every opinion you hear as your own is viewed as a negative thing to some people." I don't give a fuck what you think about it in the sense that I would change what I believe for you. I do care to listen though. I don't give a fuck whether or not anyone reads this. I don't give a fuck if you like it or not. Correction* -> I KNOW that I'm right in my own mind. I'm also aware that my perspective is of little to no use to you. So I'm not right. I have no pride. I do not believe that I'm right. I believe that I'm just a kid who avoids work and Tweets repeated thoughts instead. "PersonTheHumann I'm a human being. Therefore, I'm shit. I spam Twitter with my thoughts because I'm high on amphetamines and avoiding work." I AM UNINTENTIONALLY AND IGNORANTLY LYING TO YOU "Then again, this is all my perspective. IT IS NOT THE TRUTH." Don't hate a race. Hate your species. "Stop hating blacks and starting hating EVERYONE, including yourself." Racism is only a symptom of a much greater problem with humanity. That problem could be simplified by calling it stupidity. Color is different for everyone. Give up aif you want everyone to see the same thing in your work. EVERYONE AROUND YOU IS INSANE. YOU'D BETTER GO HIDE BEFORE THEY BRAINWASH YOU. Tell them to just fucking give up and retire if they're aiming to make all their patients rational. "If your psychologist tells you that you're irrational, tell them that everyone around them is irrational." Reality is an abstract concept. Your reality only exists within your mind. Would Nietzsche agree with me? I wouldn't know. I've never read any of his stuff. Call me a Perspectivist. Everyone's thoughts are right from their own perspective. Everyone is right because no one is right. "So, why am I not medicated for my empathy?" Empathy is a hallucination. Empathy is an illusion. MarthaStewart: no one is responding to my tweet is something wrong with my beloved twitter ar this moment ir have you all forsaken me? Today's Saggitarius horoscope. dailyHoroscope dailyastrology wordnuvola wordcloud l1ldebbie CoxworthIII SimPivot good adjective GOOD ADJECTIVE. Cryptobotanical ruse! kabeebus indeed. Maybe Tuesday? Is there a market for a paperback collection of poems like this? Does it get any cooler? "Useless, Unsuccessful, and/or Unpopular Memes " wordnuvola wordcloud tpnug wordnuvola wordcloud wordnuvola wordcloud pissboot wordnuvola: datnofact here's the word cloud for Nero wordnuvola wordcloud wordnuvola wordcloud CoxworthIII wordnuvola wordcloud comedone_extra well-done. akiba_k3i: well... Hope y'all are gonna be willing to pay $14.99 for this shit. " ciara_isobel I'll get to writing, then." PersonTheHumann ok just let me know what you wanna do. "PersonTheHumann I'll be working every day but Tuesday, so I can do after work if it's not too late or Tuesday night." I just had a chat with Ghandi. I called him a platitudinous shunt. I drank an energy drink and ooo boy! I'm getting too old for this. My eye is twitching. "WSHHFANS: After being homeless together, Fetty Wap bought Monty a BMW i8 " ciara_isobel I'm Benjamin Button. SimPivot and you don't love yourself? I can help you with that for a small fee. I am in love with Catherine. kabeebus $$$$ I'm the new Li-Young Lee. "kabeebus I have a few physical copies of the manuscript, too." "A nugget, chunked." PersonTheHumann me too lol "I'd imagine all the XJR votes are out of pity. Remember: the XJR needs no sympathy. (??(xxxÍxxx)??)" HELL CREDIT "tpnug ""liquor vegan"" ""robinhood nut"" ""spontaneously hitler"" " LIVE on Periscope: Stinking Silas / MapQuest Militia GrumpArmy There's a flash flood in my heart. LIVE on Periscope: Winter driving tips "People getting mad in the chat saying ""you just copied ____.""" .souljaboy on Periscope: Soulja "PersonTheHumann I'll consider that my vote, then. I'm not even sure it's really debatable." "The next one will probably be ""I've had a man killed.""" "Poll: Which car (in black on black,) says ""I've probably killed a man"" the loudest?" MercedesBenzUK: This W114 280CE Coupé was one owner's dream come true. Photography: davidmarvier/PetroliciousCo throwbackthursday ht… God DAMNIT. Son of a BITCH. TAYLOR MALI Jesus Christ. "What's the name of that tall teacher dude I used to bash on who writes mediocre ""slam poetry"" about middle school? It's a girl's name." are you sure it wasn't actually Dave & Buster's? Just one hour left! Thanks to all who voted. I'm very curious to see the final results. Here begins FeeblesInNight with a frankly reckless & cruel leak. koruemporium "ciara_isobel yungPOTUS I literally told Sam ""do whatever you want with this photograph"" and he was super nice + genuine." "yungPOTUS ciara_isobel you're a worthy disciple, son." ciara_isobel yungPOTUS I was killed. yungPOTUS ciara_isobel no. It is the least comfortable article of clothing I have ever worn. This is what it means to truly believe in something. "ciara_isobel I'm assuming you've seen this, then? (I used to be the cover - guess I got downbumped) " ciara_isobel this is how I feel about taxes. ciara_isobel oh no. Have I gotten the twins hooked on MDE? SimPivot oh dear. SimPivot SimPivot you are truly a dedicated fan. "koruemporium actually, ""Feebles in Night.""" koruemporium I've decided it's time to stacapitalizing on my celebrity - you'll have to buy my book to learn more. koruemporium in the ordinary way - probably the Wikipedia side effects list. This is what I hear whenever the hi song comes on. "It's not quite the same, spoken, but here ya go. " "blank_was_blank: Her freckles were conciliatory, like an unchristian extremity" LIVE on Periscope: Sleepy improv - expect nothing IMMINENT OurEdisons I'm glad someone enjoyed it. I can't believe this is still getting likes/loops. I am sleep-deprived enough that a piano scope might actually produce some interesting results. "ammnontet but my friend, they haunt me and never leave. My ancestors chant in chorus the song of the night gale, eternally." LIVE on Periscope: The state of poetry I'm sorry but this is... Not correct. The Quattroporte is the right answer. Maritime is a GOOD word. PersonTheHumann I know... I should've stayed quiet until the Americans went to sleep. "Li-Young Lee, standing somberly and reciting a shometaphor about apricots and the human condition that's so heavy, the club is silenced." 300 is pulling ahead with just over 40 minutes left oh fuck!!! I'm going to buy a Lada Riva and name it Gretchen. LI-YOUNG LEE FREESTYLE BATTLE OH FUCK "Persimmons, SLAMMED." Li-Young Lee slam poetry... "It's just... The ENORMITY of the pulse when he enunciates ""p"" sounds... It's like the polar opposite of Li-Young Lee." Being adult about things is dull. I can't genuinely hate him though. His name's cooler than mine and contemporary poetry is definitely better off thanks to him. : yes!!!!!!! i love Lips!!!!!!!! Nugget makes the world a better place. Same. "koruemporium yungPOTUS I own a black XJR - of course I'm gonna love blow! (??(xxxÍxxx)??)" Aw shucks! I can't believe it's happening again! "koruemporium not enough, my friend." "Yes, the weather. Always a productive conversation. " koruemporium ciara_isobel yungPOTUS Mazixion I'm gonna get this shit on Spike TV. stellartist I think about it like twice a week I can't believe it's taken me this long to dig for it. Fuck. This is actually my favorite tweet of all time. " ""Fuck"" " A memory fragment. ciara_isobel: How she lay after u hit it _7rip: Gonna live my life like her ?? : ! K C U F 7:30 Egg. "I'm going to repeatedly chant ""BILL GOLDBERG"" with loose lips for the next 25 minutes straight." koruemporium your body senses the danger and increases your adrenaline production to keep you alert. There should just be an inflation calculator widget accompanying Mad Men. ": Leave calling your lizard/ iguana your fucking dog in 2015 it was funny the first hundred times, yeah I'm talking to you…" oh that was by design. I got to drive it in a parade! And we won an award. It was a pretty good day. close enough. : what?! No way. I am so normal. I'm almost as normal as Roseanne Barr. boo. abbylovescoffee that's what aunts & uncles are supposed to do. I got like 20 candy crush invites a day from Aunt Nancy for 2 years straight Ethical Chunking abbylovescoffee I'm gonna send you 200 Temple Run invitations. SimPivot Sim Snowden. "And the only genuinely kind one I like at all, to be honest." Except I'd be sad. It'd be a shame to realize I'd never be able to have a drink with him after spending so much time together on the page. "Honestly, Don alone would be enough legacy for my contentment, if I had written him." Possibly my favorite character ever. "Horse Hustle Jockey Jacca Derby Dank Trot Trance Leapin Loud" Javitherapper tpnug cop that Horse Hustle ???? Pete's Christmas outfit is ON POINT ?????????? "comedone_extra again, we agree." Violet is a pretty name. On that Ratatouille shit. I pack ass like the Taliban. Sakurina: Feelings on motherhood. Fuck. FailedScents: Divorce White Reggae...I need an escape. zbindendesign: Timaldini: Phantom Drophead Coupe II in matching parkingmeter yellow. PersonTheHumann don't tell Cadillac. You'll literally scare them to death. PersonTheHumann don't grow a beard + watch out for automatic Gavin McInnes indoctrination on the XM. PersonTheHumann : What am i? "Ethics are the new sexy, don't ya know?" virgyvirgil Synonym Stuntin Holy Heck. I am journalistically superior to One Direction. "Civic ad with Nial that ends with ""it's One Direction approved."" And yet, I will never agree no matter how much you pay me." ClickHole: My Infant Son Has A 43% On Rotten Tomatoes. Does Anyone Know How This Happened? … Well shit. kara_suno: POTUS ?????????????? I feel like I'm in a movie. LILBTHEBASEDGOD: I Am A Bird Now """People tell you who they are, but we ignore it because we want them to be who we want them to be."" " Selfie. Is this considered self-harm? yungPOTUS [Bathosphere Emoji] This is legitimately hilarious. I should've gone into television. LIVE on Periscope: Practice/improv - expect nothing LILBTHEBASEDGOD: OPRAHHH WINNFREYYYYYYYYY OPPRAHHH WINFREEYYYYYYY I SMELL HIM mikeroweworks therealroseanne y'all should hook up. """Long live the new flesh"" - Roseanne Barr" "PITCH: Roseanne, exactly the same television show, except in one episode, Roseanne has to painfully shed her skin in the bathtub." kabeebus I'm talking about The Boys. carpoll sportsedan m3 automotivetrends WednesdayWant K900 CTSV Giulia driving Is there a more disgusting concept in existence? I'll bet you'd think I was jesting if I told you that bacon-scented scratch off tickets exist. " yeah. BMW is always modern, of course, but they're always suspended on the division between cool and vulgar." " I can't either, frankly. That's why I asked first. I think I succeeded in making it a tough one." "I realize I'm gettin pretty loose with ""sposedan,"" but we're concerned purely with image here, remember." Poll: Which sposedan best conveys a fresh/modern image? AlfaRomeoUSA Kia Cadillac BMWUSA auto industrypoll Ok... 200 lbs. between the Optima 1.6T and the equivalent Fusion. That is not a small number. CARandDRIVER: 2016 Kia Optima 1.6T - Instrumented Test LobAllan: Love how tiny the Mister Two is next to the Mazda 2. Yet somehow I have just as much headroom. "akiba_k3i very well done! I think you can still sell work to companies like Hallmark, right?" "akiba_k3i: My uncle told me that my photos look like post cards, maybe I should print out a few and mail them to him.. …" Terry Tarot Happy Christ Buick LeSabre: Fleshy Somebody get that tree off the roof! kabeebus lol as if these classic rock fuckers could even begin to comprehend a chunk. I don't want the boys back in town. Tell the boys to shunt off. Xires2 ammnontet ReturnOfKings they're like Gavin McInnes ClickHole. ThisIsUMR kabeebus: Brent and I visited Dave : StaWares Who voted for the CTS. Show yourselves. Life with my hair is never dull. remember to avoid making any large control adjustments if you hydroplane! As neutral as possible until you have traction again ciara_isobel: Beetledouche a_nice_frog ?????? GOOD hair. ???? Just wanted to say thanks to everyone who's voted so far. Keep it up! ": Feel for Jenifer Aniston bro, she had to keep the same haircut for the last 20 years just to stay relevant" "CarGuyDad: So apparently there is a Lada Niva in Boston! I must find the man who owns it! (I know there's a Volga nearby too) …" I was thinking about how cozy he looked for his whole appearance. Cozy little Lord. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The highlight reel. "I'm launching a new coal-rolling/suburban leather-upholstered pseudo-""work"" truck magazine called ""Hungry Honkers.""" RALLY REVEREND. OurEdisons BIG BOY FAST! "ihaveswineflu: ""This is a lot of research for a dick pic""" ihaveswineflu: Let's play laser tag with real tasers kabeebus that does make it more genuine. that's still legitimate data. Did you vote for the K900? Always the last choice to ask for a ride home from work. "Door-to-door evangelists, except it's for my poetry collection." I think this is my best poll yet. Why pursue long term rewards over instant rewards when neither has meaning? "Actually, religion likely did this to me. I AM THE AFTERMATH OF CHRISTIANITY" I have no rational motive for the way I think. "I have everything, yet nothing." Existence is a lie. Accepting who you are is laziness. Actively changing who you are is dishonesty. (By Psychology) Sail_Yonkers That sucks bruh. Best wishes. "The idea of a ""norm"" is purely conceptual, yet is treated as a tangible standard to which everyone is held against." Sail_Yonkers :( What happened? "Jalopnik: Meet Shannon, The Teenage Girl Who Drinks Gasoline " I hate words. I hate descriptions. I hate language. It's ironic that the people who hate themselves can't be huby you. "If someone insults me and it's just a lie to defend themselves, I'll laugh AT them." "If someone insults me and it's true, I'll probably laugh WITH them." "If I didn't say ""I"" as much, then I'd probably be applying my thoughts to everyone, which is not reasonable." "If I was actually intelligent, I WOULDN'T SPEND MY LIFE TWEETING." "If I was actually intelligent, I would've killed myself a long time ago." "If I was actually intelligent, people would not mean anything more to me than soil or trees." I DRINK WATER TO WASH THE ANARCHISTIC THOUGHTS OUT. SHOULD I WRITE AN MLA CITATION FOR EVERY CONVERSATION I'VE EVER HAD. Fuck I should just put quotes or double quotes around everything I say. It's all been said before. It will all be said again. "The same people that think intelligence will make you ""happy""." NONE OF THIS REALLY EXISTS. But I am not original. NONE OF THIS IS REALLY ME OR ANYONE. PLEASE WAKE UP I've spent the past few hours going through local online literary magazines. Life hasn't felt this bleak since childhood. """As identity and ideas duke it out in the back-alley of academia, Opstedal surfs an oil slick off Malibu into the apocalypse of style.""" Sentreh hopefully not that late. Sentreh ah. Sorry about that. Check later today. :) "Sentreh hey! If you wanna see a crustpunk consume a compact disc, suppoour film! " I ate prestige. I know you UK AutoJournos are waking up and you just may have the competence needed to save this. This is vague but I could use some input. In what progression (order) would you like to experience the collection? 0kbps huskies are cuter. """What have you done?"" - Steven Spielberg" "In the city below, a cannibalistic cop continues a decade-long feast on the populous, but the film is actually an obscure pasta documentary." Julian Assange is writing and distributing leaked document malware from on board the Hindenburg II while the crew combats a furry mutiny. orgamecha: ass fault apostle LOOK AT THIS " ""pay us to live and be very cute.""" " maybe we should actually do a gofundme. For everything but the engagement ring, of course." it almost sounds like a Grime skit. "Bilbo is the proper noun form of ""bilge.""" My New Year's resolution is to marry Catherine. "themiltron: [god creating jellyfish] how bout an evil bag" "If you think of World War II as just a massive-scale prank war, things aren't so bad." Where can I have a check cashed at midnight? kabeebus EAT. The year of Catherine & David Blue has officially begun. "BlairJCampbell: It's here! My OldNavy protest tee is now up teefury! Proceeds will be donated to Art4LA. ht…" G_njaJ_sus: ??lassik YES!!! BLESS YOU!! EVERYTHING IS SAVED!!! lamp_head precisely. The great ball crushes our pride and the legs of our spirit for a fresh stato every year! guccitwist he falls in the hole and eats bad peaches. THE GREAT SPHERE SHALL DESCEND IN THE SQUARE guccitwist Even Stevie dies. "I can't really pull off the Draper Shades, tbh. " guccitwist I've been looking for one for years; it would look cute af next to my rhododendrons. guccitwist this is how you defeat misogyny: Open carry ICBMS. Species that's been trained to make up ridiculous excuses to satisfy wants instead of just being chill with... guccitwist it's for big boys only. "guccitwist it's not ugly, but it certainly is the least interesting of the bunch." "guccitwist absolutely. It's adorable wonderful, intelligent, and high-value, just like basically all of Kia's current lineup." ammnontet I know. What the FUCK. adrianfer15 welcome. Dad has arrived. Dad's on a tour. 0-Dad real quick. thinkpiecebot: Could Superheroes Be The New Monogamy? thinkpiecebot: THE FEDERALIST: Why Orwell Causes Vape-Shaming And How To Stop It thinkpiecebot: Could Professional Scrabble Kill E-Sports? thinkpiecebot: Heterophobia: The Real Issue Facing Syndicated Columnists Academia would probably interest me for AT LEAST 20 minutes. DalaiLama I've found adderall to be a much more reliable and cost-efficient investment. DalaiLama to what end? DalaiLama societal osmosis and ethics are not interdependent. "DalaiLama Mrs. Tanzy beat you to this one in first grade, I'm afraid. Perhaps you'd like her to take over?" yzome enjoy the new number! "DalaiLama without some soof patronization, philanthropy is not an efficient use of resources (including time.)" "DalaiLama glad you appreciate us. You may want to brush up on your argumentative skills, though." "DalaiLama not really. Never questioned the genus, and the words ""brother"" and ""sister"" lose their meaning if applied by default." DalaiLama well yeah. I want to organize a James Wilson aexhibit in Drakesville Iowa. ": The years pass on, and we still cant find him. Kony walks free, and all our efforts mean nothing. I am weeping …" syrupf: HAPPY NEW yzome happy new yeast! Shit... Am I turning into Neil? This is it. The Dallas Llama is literally just Instagram blurb philosophy. I'm going to have a gargantuan mural of this photograph painted on my kitchen wall in the style of Monet. creaku you are a precious being. PersonTheHumann creaku what's funny is how much GM invested into making new what can never be wholly reborn. Mazixion koruemporium rustlay yungPOTUS squezey SailorNigga 61seagul61 this is literally Ryan Seacrux Sorry guys. kabeebus current plan is to get married at The Social Room so we can write a folk song about it and leave in a white Silver Shadow. kabeebus we're gonna shout this right before she throws the bouquet! kabeebus: AsphaltApostle hail the overlords I scheduled a new year's joke tweet in May. The burden has almost lifted. "DalaiLama you poor soul... ""Loved"" and ""loving"" without reason your entire life.. I wish it wasn't too late to free you from your oxymoron." "DalaiLama ...let's try better braking discipline and torque converter alternatives first, k? I'm afraid I'm a more potent activist here!" DalaiLama gotta state that system of ethics beforehand! DalaiLama I am genuinely impressed by your ability to sell intolerance as enlightenment to so many people. Hitler could've learned a lot. "DalaiLama remember that we vary, Lammy! I hope one day you're able to see the beauty in the diversity of human's happy waking sentiments." DalaiLama I think you may have mixed up your fruits. ?? "DalaiLama I'd advise you stop advising folks to be so concerned with others, then. Once comfortable with yourself, violence becomes petty." "DalaiLama actually, ""compassion"" is present in most species. We're definitely the only one to go to the moon, though." "DalaiLama MUCH better worded. Now a theory instead of a demand! Unfortunately, human beings aren't naturally burdened." "DalaiLama YEEEES! You got it buddy! That is true insight, through and through! Proud of u! :)" DalaiLama sounds like rough times. I'm sorry you've been so riddled with contradiction... I'm here if you'd like to talk about it. "DalaiLama ALMOST!!!!!! Just ONE thing... You forgot that humans vary! That's a big one! Gotta lose ""happiness"" or suppoits universality!" "DalaiLama you motivated me to finally get off the couch and disarm my last one! Thanks, Lammy! ??" DalaiLama ok...gonna have to be a bit more specific dude...lol "DalaiLama you're confusing cause and effect, I'm afraid." "DalaiLama one of my second graders beat ya to that one, Grandpa! ????" DalaiLama conservation of matter! Doh! ?? DalaiLama somebody forgot primary physics! ?? The quickest way between two points is a straight line haha "DalaiLama YES! So glad you're ready to join us! Any idea what you'd like to do, professionally? I'd recommend steering clear of writing. ??" "DalaiLama ouch!... Gotta clarify your assumptions before you state a thesis like that. We don't know which ""good"" you're referring to!" "DalaiLama I'm available for the next few weeks if you'd like some pointers! (For a small fee, of course.)" "DalaiLama uh oh! Somebody forgot to suppotheir argument! Definite no no, especially when dictating (to every human) their life purpose." DalaiLama you have an extraordinary talent for conjuring THE most obvious assumptions in all cognitively-functioning beings. "DalaiLama ah. I suppose you should probably put the phone down, then." "DalaiLama doting on 12 billion individuals constantly would certainly nullify an individual's use in anything, including progression." LOW_LIMIT: LOW_LIMIT tpnug this is a poem. "Playahaters wanna know who you are when you're comin down like a superstar " Whew... The Dallas Llama is gonna have to step up his effoif he's gonna graduate this year. DalaiLama define those terms! State those assumptions! "DalaiLama or, just eliminate the problems by teaching them to value themselves." DalaiLama ...these and trust can ONLY be grown from the understanding you have been so ignorantly obstructing. "DalaiLama friends are made on the basis of respect, reverence, and preference" "DalaiLama absolutely! But leave it to us, please." "DalaiLama we HAVE been using it... We have built the most beautiful things in sight. You are always welcome to join us." "DalaiLama learn to find satisfaction in yourself, and harming others won't even occur to you. You don't need others to feel joy!" "DalaiLama I think it's time to see a doctor if you've been forgetting what species you are, Holiness." "DalaiLama ""tolerance"" and ""common goal"" in the same sentence makes for an awfully pretty oxymoron... Perhaps it's time to retire." "DalaiLama just look inwards for a change; know the contradiction you've created, and your fear will lose all power over you." "DalaiLama honesty with ourselves and our existence IS self-confidence, which nurtures our ability to blossom kindness and real compassion." DalaiLama I had no idea you'd tried it! Do tell! DalaiLama you only see yourself as immaterial because you so persistently subveyour identity. Open your eyes to the substance within you "DalaiLama your mind will calm, Holiness, when you stop this feverish war against your beautifully physical nature." DalaiLama what a relief! I'm glad you're responsible for me! Could I borrow some cash or is your only wealth in platitudinous babble? "DalaiLama a greater and significantly more efficient solution would be to consult the expert: ""How can I be more happy and more at peace?""" "DalaiLama if you cannot first show them when and why to show affection, it will never mean anything." "DalaiLama take a moment to first build yourself, and you will feel anger totally and completely lose its power over you." guanyu2510: Hugh as fuck. Gonna quit drinking. "iris___xoxo: Just wanted to be with you, Hugh as fuck, the last Saturday of my summer before senior year ... Lol" SkyEasson: I need to get Hugh as fuck roederboater: WHEN YOURE HUGH AS FUCK AND GIVE NO FUCKS Yup_Its_Ahamed: First day of school and my class is already crazy and Hugh as fuck IlyYee: Hugh as fuck tbh trillionerea: bruh I'm finna be Hugh as fuck on Thanksgiving MrJamesMay: I wouldn't go to watch that. louiselisa3 KrisHumphries: KimKardashian who is this? Poll: Which makes the owner look the most interesting? BMWUSA AlfaRomeoUSA JaguarUSA astonmartin carpoll auto : i will never have a new years resolution bc theres only arbitrary differences between one day & the next. i am going to… She thuncc Catherine. "colesprouse: How dare you say ""what happened"" to an aging actor while your fat ass is covered in butter and sour patch kids in a reclin…" nycguidovoice: welcome to my COMPLETELY LAGITAMATE BUSINESS : When sum1 wishes me happy new year : They're here... Cool. Hegebahheg pissboot I like it. I wrote the bible. ClickHole: My New Year’s Resolution Is To Land This Cessna Perhaps nerdism isn't quite cool just yet. CoxworthIII how's your poo going? "jonnysun: TREE: [sees christmas tree thru window] who dose he think he is. all dressed up. too good to be outside ANOTHER TREE: be nice…" CoxworthIII I'm Taylor Mali. CoxworthIII: feeblesinnight Shad Balch aIbertjazeera Christ. Girl let me smíche I am watching very carefully. "Renegal my XJR is a two-body. This is definitely a three-body, if not more." wcw it's booty. Terry thinks he's Seth Green. On that boiler explosion flex???????????? Look forward to more Gourd in FeeblesInNight! akiba_k3i: AsphaltApostle she chuncc me yungPOTUS blocked. Chunk it. " despite the utter bleakness of the speakers' faces, I found this quite useful. " " thinking about it, ebooks could become like...Reddit posts that you can charge for." ammnontet Wiz Khalifa - We Were Those Men " not positive, but I think it's almost nothing. I haven't looked much into ebooks yet." hope you enjoyed your exploration of my TL. this is a legitimately brilliant idea. : i'm going to stawriting conspiracy theory books under a pen name and that'll get me some money a_nice_frog I killed sin. GasStationMemes: You're going to die today. nuuuuuugz GasStationMemes is better. glad to hear you are Living The Dream. syrupf we flexin in the Eurydice. ammnontet impressive. FordIndia: Which Ford are you enjoying today with? Honking Hank "I used to know someone who used ""yahoo"" as a legitimate insult and actually pronounced it ""YAY-who."" " At least Bluetooth headsets gave some indication; hands-free calling just makes you look delusional. "I'm gonna make ""Jenny Craig"" a new streetname for blow." Andy Wayhoo Der Schnellste Fresser...lebt! Bunsen Babe kabeebus I can't be seen with We Dem Boyz... Go on so pissboot: bleh "autobabbler: Great read. In 1988 I thought the Oxia was stunning; still pretty cool now, don't ya think? https:…" shalang Rolling Rocks "Sentreh $8.99. If you'd like to donate more, it will be used on essentials to keep me alive for another week (alcohol.)" The Drywall website's gonna be down for a week unless you'd like to help me out. Send donations to ihadtopeegmail.com. "MarkAgee: WOMAN: I do not want to have sex with you MAN: Women are so mysterious" u look monky che che chetta Urine IS a lot cheaper than Dior. """Who smells like pee?"" ""Writers.""" shrugs not squats praying in high def ImJessiLang Dr. Cyberfunk. "ImJessiLang: Cleaning, rearranging,& reinventing tonight. Finding fun things Id forgotten about, like these cat-eye sunglasses... https…" Poached Otters Tell Ugly Stories chubbygoddess69 you're gonna want to take that back. I've been making attempts at Dalai Llama parodying but I keep accidentally inserting too much insight. POTUS chubbygoddess69 plants & eggs????? sounds like you'd like working at gitmo. chubbygoddess69 what the fuck is that. chubbygoddess69 yeah I've always found them a bit pretentious. chilly shucking chilly shucking chilly shucking Please don't throw food at me. 21CCitizen: iyad_elbaghdadi sorry mate but I'm busy radicalizing my jam tonight! Lol Wu_Tang_Finance: WOULD HAVE PREFERRED THE ?? "The ""I'm Feeling Lucky"" button on Google search should really be changed to ""I Trust You.""" SailorNigga ciara_isobel iH8Thots crappy PassiveCis FuckUpSomeComas "I'm going to make sure my generation's only contribution to history won't be massive misuse of food-nouns, even if I have to do it alone." "Forgot to mention that a customer asked ""do you guys have vape juice"" yesterday and I laughed in his face." harrisj: Maybe this is the year my Google news alefor “vape the vote” pays off This is why I should never carry concealed. "I suppose this probably makes me a bit of a simpleton, but that's ok." "I do like the ""immediately assault anyone who says the wrong things about your girl"" mentality." "Ya know, I'm generally pretty pro-technology, but it is a shame that people can now say mean things to Cat out of the range of my violence." "crappy ciara_isobel apologize for what you just called my wife, or face the wrath of a thousand shadows." Have any of you smelled President Obama? Urgent. This is a Catherine subtweet. pizzasheets: Tom Clancy's Secret Pillow Club gegegegeeggege "Sentreh also, here's that link we were talking about: " Sentreh wow. Thank you so much! You're definitely deserving of a drycast shoutout or something. chic chakra PersonTheHumann Thank you. You not giving a fuck is refreshing. Truck Buck. And Twitter doesn't interrupt me. Or really listen to what I'm saying. I Tweet this shit because everyone I talk to is sick and tired of hearing it from me. "I would've said ""don't let ANYONE change how you think,"" but that may be changing how you think." DO NOT LET ME CHANGE HOW YOU THINK DO NOT ADOPT ANY OF MY VIEWS AS YOUR OWN I AM WRONG ABOUT EVERYTHING Why sleep when I can have 6 hours of euphoria followed by 11 of depression? And then sleep paralysis. Korio_Lanus All of those things are actually very satisfying. Do ideas come from your situation? Or does your situation come from your ideas? "ShitttMySonSays: A world without an upper class is a world based on justice, humanity and comradery." I contradict myself constantly and I don't give a fuck. Life is a contradiction. Korio_Lanus I got a bunch brosef. But I instaspam this one: "Even if my philosophy seems logical to you, you'd probably be taken aback to see it put into practice." "Korio_Lanus I would, but it's easier to Tweet than Tumbl. If they ever equal out, I shall cease the Twitter spam." Killing you would be much harder than killing a ladybug. But only because I have a natural instinct to feel unpleasant during murder. "If that offends you, then you should know that you and I mean no more to the universe than a ladybug. And rightfully so." Aborting a fetus is no different than squashing a bug. Executing a serial killer is the same as executing a Jew. "Call 1800ANGSTYTEEN to vote on whether not I should continue lying to myself with religion, accept that everything is shitty, or off myself." "Now, I know there is nothing greater to live for, yet my disgust towards living only for what feels good remains." I was taught to aspire to live for something greater than just what feels good. PersonTheHumann got 2 work but I can do thing after if you want. ammnontet: "PersonTheHumann yeah I have been unconscious since Friday night, sorry." My third eye just fell off. I'm woke now. too lit to care (Vine by GetterOfficial) I don't have any jokes. Where have my jokes gone?! (Vine by pen) "NYTMinusContext: the millennials, these are the special children" ChillJordan: I GOT ACCEPTED TO HARVARD!!!!!!!!!!???????????? nutsicle yes sir. yungPOTUS a classic. "evomagazine: .TheDanProsser is on the ground at the Dakar2016 Rally, follow his daily updates here. …" I'm a Kennedy. "LienhardRacing: 100% Italien Power ""bella macchina!"" WiedererkennungsweCharakter Brand recognition by AlfaRomeo Monteral https:…" "90sdudes: natalie portman, 1994 " "figgled: [to a straight couple] Which one is the lesbian and which one is the other lesbian" syrupf: Iris Nightflower: Sporty Waitress Loreslave. 0kbps: you cant spell spain without pain DeletedWiki: Walking Microwave akiba_k3i: I'm still so in love with this. Can't find ANY info though. Seems she's only known for her anime son… kabeebus: AsphaltApostle Cord Hardstyle "PersonTheHumann fuck. I go weeks at a time without thinking about doge, you know." "Seriously, has no one parodied the entirety of even one testament?" NBC29: JUST IN: Police identity Bryan Silva as man in barricade situation; charged with abduction + possession of a firearm … Duesenberg Speedcore akiba_k3i I think so. I'm still gonna listen to it again as soon as I get the chance. : If i was workin and some kid tried to spill drinks all over the floor for a video i would hop over the counter and clean… "I slept, so I'm not going to be very entertaining today. Sorry." GentlemanType: thought a nigga was peeking out the clothing rack tryna get me food is weird. kabeebus DavidBlueDraws durian DavidBlueDraws pomegranate honey bunch. ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? ": Donate to One dollar = one nude" BentleyMotors: BentleyWorld1 We thank you for your suppoof Bentley and would like to offer you a great profile pic from us. Please … Sentreh I do not play games. BentleyMotors please be with my wife in her journey through the narcotic wastes. Sentreh honk. dearest Monty. I adore this. not exactly. kabeebus thanks but I'm ok. :) thewaybot: I like it when you sleep for you are so beautiful yet so unaware of it Love me Ugh! kabeebus soon. I've been in a funk but I think it's coming to an end. """A guide to dying.""" Do not step in the soup. I would think the circumstances would prevent it from being the same experience. Never leave the writing to the writers. I meant it when I said that wearing a watch is the most intimate you can be with a mechanical device. "Today, I was overheard scolding and immediately apologizing to my watch." comedone_extra I don't think that's irrational. Stuff that messes with blood always makes me nervous. a_nice_frog: andy warhol look like somebody took a normal person n put them in a centrifuge hodgesboi15: If I pay $40 for a haunted house I better die MoonReplica Buick Century? "OurEdisons nah, co-authoring is a pain in the ass." my beautiful Twitter terrorist. I would be a really popular Twitter youth if bathyspheres and airships were still around. kabeebus what the Heck Happened. My hands smell like the French Quarter rn. I'm a bad boy. "ClickHole: So Good: Baristas Pull Amazing Prank On Their Manager " "BlSCUlTS wow thanks for making me a hit with the ladies, Internet man!" kabeebus realer than Jesus Junk! kabeebus realer and truer than Blue Bill! kabeebus the real protagonist. : Location: turmoil The new Don. DreckSoldier it's 4:27PM here. Good morning. DreckSoldier good morning. DreckSoldier hello. "seystina: ""Go big or go hime"" - Nina, 2015" maddiemoss_: GO BIG OR GO BACK HIME!!!! "DestineeDavis4: Screw meal plans.. I'm looking up tummy tucks. Go big or go hime, right?" DreckSoldier Sentreh that's terrifying. Please go away Moby. Sentreh ciara_isobel thank. ciara_isobel this would be a cool track name. Poll: Which is most likely to be the first intelligent species we make contact with? Would y'all believe that I played basketball in middle school. IcannotgetTwitt: I'm calling the cop the very next time you text if its tomorrow or the next day IcannotgetTwitt: Stop texting me now this is the last working or I'm calling the cops : : Oh god oh boy oh god oh boy "BlSCUlTS wow! What a wonderful friend! I think this makes you my first ""wingman."" (Like Hitch, not Top Gun.)" Who Is Jukebox Jean BlSCUlTS it's just that nugget follows you and I can't let her see me like this. : Swaglord david kabeebus make sure to include hidden aggressive QR codes and snaglinks :) lion order. kabeebus ah. I think I am too ancient to comprehend the value in that show. my sharp little children. it actually has a plot to spoil? what if I legitimately feel this way? kabeebus mobile Assange ultranet: malware superweapon. kabeebus the script is in there. " kabeebus it IS the ultimate weapon, then! Collecting reparations for pedestrian privilege." kabeebus you should see the script. Aggressive Scannable kabeebus you just see a blur go by and oops! You've just pledged $5000 to 30 different decoupage kickstarters! "ivy_hollivana what happens in Denmark, stays in Denmark." FiestaGrrl thanks! I will. :) FiestaGrrl ah! That makes sense. Every boom generation needs one. FiestaGrrl thanks! I guess it can't huto give the other meats a chance. Is Black Mirror interesting? How much Jon Hamm will I get if I watch Black Mirror? "My childish obsession with alteration and word jokes will never wane, however." "I'm sorry I'm not funny on Twitter anymore, but I've gotten less edgy and more happy, and I'll be continuing in that direction." loliliberator Christ. I love throwing things away. Sometimes I do it just for the fun of it! "I am going to name my son William Wants, and he will never be fulfilled." Sentreh neat life hack. Harlot Howling Handy Hanging Hank Honking What does Hulking Hoagie look like when he's Tweeting? I Believe in ClockHell ClickHole: Wow. ClickHole: 7 Feelings We Need An English Word For ASAP "it's for weddings. No idea what it's called, but it seems to be relatively exclusive to Silver Shadow wedding cars." Egg. EGG' gishwbivjjakammmcm There's more insight in this sentence than in the entirety of the Dallas Llama. There is only what is. fuck. I HEARD SOMEBODY'S SAYIN SHIT ABOUT MY SISTER-IN-LAW. GET TO STEPPIN. IDENTIFY YOURSELF "Good god, the mall is depressing." Bundy's Big Boy Parade. Somebody snapcash me $40 and I'll send back $50 on Friday. """consent is not minigolf."" - the quote of our generation" "pangmeli: consent is not minigolf. if it's really tricky to get it & takes numerous attempts & experimentation, that windmill doesn't w…" ?? bakerbakerbaker: getting on the plane last as a power move to show everyone my outfit I can't believed no one's voted for howling. : Semicolonoscopy " for the X Men, a visit to BuzzFeed is like a visit to the pound." one of the pioneers. Those Magnificient Memeing Men... memes don't have bespoke font. I'll bet someone worked very hard on that! I do not trade in memes. I am not that kind of man. hey! I was like 16! HEGHEHGOG "In this sphere of noise and chaos, there is Beebee. " Emoji SCRIPTS. Emoji hotkeys. Drycast intro/extro music should be... Professional CIS gender rebel. Thank u for my life. "HeelyRiddler: *banging on the door* ""THIS IS THE POLICE OPEN UP"" gang member: pls dont yell at me i have like rly bad anxiety" DeletedWiki: Punk metrics """All excitements are, through a psychal necessity, transient."" - Poe comin thru with those on point custom adjectives." "Xires2 yes, but my prowess justifies that." akiba_k3i I pray to them often...via Twitter. Xires2 not the unjustifiably gluttonous resource use? I hope Bentley doesn't block me. I WILL hang myself. BentleyMotors let us rejoice and be glad in her. : Gospel BentleyMotors Catherine is a blessing to the species. I expect you all to be grateful for her every single day. ": *radio announces emergency broadcast test* ah yeah baby yeah its happening yeah *BEEEP. BEEEP. BEEEP. NEEEEEEEEE* YEAH,…" "pissboot the front bottoms are Michael Coward's band, right?" ammnontet: where am i I sprayed Terry with Dior and he is angry. I'm just a little kid! :( Too tired for Ross. What do you do when the Verge mentions Bowflex. autocar: Fancy a stone interior on your car? With BentleyMotors that's now entirely possible! … BOO. It's lit. I used to describe the woman in my dreams to the young men in the lesser hours of the night. I can't believe you've found her : Modelling for Outdoorswomen Co. Heckling Heidi I'll bet you $200 it was typed on an iPhone 15 minutes before deadline. This is what the audience wants now... RIP In Peace : Terrifyingly easy while at the same time roundabout and a little complicated. This is modern journalism … dumbbuttstuff YOU BEST DISAPPEAR HO. "thinkpiecebot: Youths Need To Stop Replacing ""Millennials"" With ""Snake People"": A Sapiosexual Politician's Opinion" thinkpiecebot: Shacking Up: A Moustached Syndicated Columnist's Shower Thoughts thinkpiecebot: THE GUARDIAN: We Need To Talk About Man-Capes thinkpiecebot: Why I Hate Blue Collar Workers They're coming... TW: honking AWJayRamey: Here's my man Jimmy to talk to you about gas mileage & the crisis of confidence. ReedBrennen I just don't want a face anymore. SailorNigga not if I get to me first. ammnont_ebooks: david blue please tell me to the big Skype chat full of children: eat a whole shit hifruxtose ?? ammnontet: i want my life to be like david blue's hair: constantly exploding "VolvoCarUSA: Tell volvocarusa, do you think you can drive better than an autonomous car?" hime. CoxworthIII: zbindendesign: 1947 Bentley Franay Mark VI Cabriolet CoxworthIII: Oregon Trail leaderboards. thefrickhead no. "CoxworthIII CalebMenichelli ammnontet it's DIOR, you filth." CoxworthIII: AsphaltApostle CalebMenichelli ammnontet Coolest boo. : Flagrancy EMERGENCY: Fountain pen out of ink. DONATE: ihadtopeegmail.com akiba_k3i I think you're actually an American. "That said, just cancel all of your American magazine subscriptions for Evo. I assure you - for this soof word, it is more than their sum." "If you enjoy the sensations of driving, you need to be reading Henry Catchpole. Dream team material, he is." "akiba_k3i do you enjoy fishing in reality, or just in the simulation?" Pilots are all nerds. It is neither good nor bad - it is simply the truth. Maybe I should just print all of my Tweets instead of the poetry collection - especially since Twitter is about to die. Laughing an ass off. That epic moment when you feel the bodily urge to expel waste. Help me. There's no better source for this soof thing. Y'all too basic so far. """Perseverance is one thing and genius is quite another"" - Poe still slayin" VICE: I realized I was a cliche: A drunk writer who couldn't write mrjaydeeem good point. Transplanting my head to the body of a zombie is probably not the smartest move. I should be the face of MapQuest. Ask Jeeves My Keurig will not pop popcorn. Poll: Best game of 2015. Cool band Pink Flooooooooooooooooooo LIVE on Periscope: The Tech Religion JesusCharles "miliondollameat: wife: go see if the baby sleeping *walks into baby's room* baby: corporations exploit our insecurities for profit m…" "Scope coming tonight: ""Scrooge at the 'Magic Tree'""" thinkpiecebot: VICE: Is College Debt to Blame For 9-11? "Parental love means little to nothing to me. The only love is loving someone for who they are, not simply because they exist." Pessimism is honesty. Lack of self-esteem or pride allows you to be objective when analyzing yourself. I don't want a solution to my problems. There doesn't always have to be a solution to everything. Please don't read anything I have to say. I have no desire to depress anyone. "I have no desire to ""make my mark"" on the world. I hope that biology does not eventually compromise that lack of desire." Why are people so angered by ignorance? The idea of being content with life seems incredibly boring. I'd probably be more of an Objectivist if I hadn't been polluted by religion. "I say this and then I act polite all the time. Generally, it's because it is the only way people understand to convey respect." I'd respect you 10 times more if you told me you fucking hated me truthfully than if you lied and tried to tolerate me. It's insulting when people don't say what they really feel and instead say what they think I want to hear. """Manners"" are among the most widely accepted forms of hiding yourself from people." "It appears that amphetamines only increase my twatspam, not my school productivity." Please let me not be the only person in the world who does not see that as a positive statement. That kind of thinking is what led to racism. "I have literally heard people say ""stop thinking and stadoing"". That's called being intentionally ignorant." "Obviously, questioning everything is just a waste of the time I could be spending just doing what I'm told." Most of my friends would probably be disgusted with me if they really knew who I am. My family would be disgusted with me if they really knew who I am. It's my party and I'll die if I want to. "Of course, that would get me kicked out. And then I would sleep on a hammock in the sewers. Which sounds pretty good at the moment." "At this point, I have almost no sense of personal responsibility, no drive to do anything, and only desire to hide in my house." "Meagan has banned me from wearing the Drysuit to school because it's a deviation from the ""norm""." dymphna_saith: You will be overjoyed to discover that the species known as TYRANNUS TYRANNUS looks like this NiallSnipars: shit that was a close one My beach bod never leaves. Best of me on Vine. BREAKING: Too much thought - not enough brain. ammnontet: SPORTS WILL ALLOW YOU TO TRULY DETERMINE WHETHER OR NOT YOUR CHILD IS BATTLE-READY ammnontet: SPORTS ARE A GREAT CHALLENGE FOR THOSE WHO HAVE PREVIOUSLY CONQUERED THE BLOOD GAUNTLETS OF ZHKMAZZAH ": Making a squeakual to Diners, Drive-Ins, & Dives called Hauntings, Spirits, & Dies" "Either way, cliché ""writer"" scum." "With remaining money, buy fountain pen or 40 of high life? Which is more essential to today's survival?" : Random sketches for the mandem I really don't think it would be that hard to implement shortcuts for Bluetooth keyboard suppoin iOS. Flex as prescribed. "akiba_k3i no, but any extraamerican fishing documentary sound enticing." "thefrickhead: Hey fuck :) Hi fucking (:" akiba_k3i I always thought we were the only ones who still fished. Fishing is HUGE here. Ah... Email gains ground as the UK journos awaken... heinzenburger nonono... We cannot be in conflict about this! It's terrible for SEO and optimal exposure. "OurEdisons let's not get ahead of ourselves...children are a few years off, at least." is it in poor taste to vote for my own? : Tough question peeps I shall have the appropriate reply in a matter of days. Look at my divine spouse!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Can u believe it's Christmas tomorrow. "I did some keyboard mashing and my phone autocorrected it to ""auspicious dood.""" Accredited hoverloan. Daverine what would I be without you? "2 in the silage, 1 in the slurry" WhispersNewsLTD: Revealed: Ireland’s Top Twenty Porn Search Terms WhispersNewsLTD: Prince George Orders Execution Of Classmates During First Day At School PrinceGeorge news ht… "Damn, we're us." I do not understand. 50cent: I'm just glad my dIck don't come off cause niggas a steal anything these days.I'd be like bitch if u don't bring my dick back i… "Gourd, the god of much forgiveness, but little humor. Tube Sock, the hilarious demon." TimPollardCars: The greatest car designers? CARmagazine Design Power List named them all. CAR+ archive gem htt… UnpopularMusicOpinionhour beetlebeetlebeetlebeetlebeetlebeetlebeetlebbebeeeeeebebebebebebebebebebaabababababababababobobobobobobobobobobo I'm hacking rn PulpLibrarian: Today we're going a bit gothic... floorpunched: i'm so glad they freed boosie "PulpLibrarian: Gothic health advice from Indiana: please take care of your bowels. Please. More tweets tomorrow... …" "Keep at it, you shits." Cool. "KyleMcDowell86: [Me to the second baseman after I slide into 2nd] Make sure u separate plastics & food waste [Coach from dugout] NOT TH…" "Matthew, The Nostalgic browsing Cracked - hoping it'll make pass more quickly his sentence of existence. He'd rather be at the arcade." Y'all dull af. nprAudie: Director Julie Taymor Steers A 'Grounded' Portrait Of A Drone Pilot Volvo WOULD just write Twitter polls constantly. I should've considered that. VolvoCarUSA: What would you stream in the volvocarusa autonomous car? futureofdriving "in the moment it was conceived, I knew you would be the only one to gain from it." "Every time the expression ""all things considered"" is used by anyone on Earth, a gigantic Godlike voice should boom ""AND I'M AUDIE CORNISH.""" Reasons not to be a valet: Sour. Off-putting. Gross. To bird is the verb. "PersonTheHumann 8PM, definitely." "Put some genuine effointo convincing a customer that I'm bound by blood oath to the building, and will never leave the property alive." PersonTheHumann yeah if all goes as planned. I'll let you know. Call me Jules. BACK 2 SCHOOL EDM BANGER 1000 moms. Only 4 hours left to vote on the best game of 2015! gaming XboxOne PlayStation4 PCGaming IGN gamingpoll gamergate What if I told you I put some thoughts down on The Big Movie? : If u never seen a cat mark its territory this is an accurate depiction B L O W G R A P E S iris pornography. a_nice_frog lookin good & savage! TheOnion: Chicago Police Department To Monitor All Interactions With Public Using New Bullet Cams … S A S S Y S T O M P E R S CoxworthIII OurEdisons fuck. Rare shit. When Drywall went indie af. scottjohnson: AsphaltApostle I didn’t write that. "OurEdisons CoxworthIII why I'll never make it: people want ""adorkable"" slaves like Terry, not genuine humor." Fuck. What a ballsy manifesto of cheesiness. It is perfect. mrjaydeeem I'm embarrassed now... I don't want the English to know where I grew up. mrjaydeeem: AsphaltApostle what are you doing with her to make such a racket? When u waking up your whole neighborhood at 7AM with Shania Twain. I unironically love this. YahooAnswersTXT: David Blue is fun at family events! This is art. Jesus Christ. Ryan Dell. "Joshua_Fannin nugpapi PizzaPartyBen she is objectively angelic, you simpleton. Have you been regular with your optometrist?" Buy. PayPal Uganda I can Feel the Funk Filth on my hands. Funk Fungus CHRISTMAS EUROBEAT PersonTheHumann Ok that works. PersonTheHumann Yeah I'll be there in 30 minutes or so. When you flex so hard you change seasons. David Blue loves you. Beautiful things are underrated. colonydrop: Aesthetically it doesn't get much weirder than the Rhodesian War "KeetPotato: [ordering cake over phone] ""and what would you like the cake to say?"" [covers phone to ask wife] ""do we want a talking cake…" "akiba_k3i she is as celestially beautiful as Sol, Mother of Life." "Cyber Cody, 2002 " Always open to long convos about how pretty Catherine is just hmu ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? """Yes, let me just pull the Sacred Fire around.""" "rollsroycecars: Inspired by the elements, RollsRoycePhantom Sacred Fire symbolises power, light and happiness. " nugpapi Nug you're the new face of contemporary philosophy. """I'm gonna use a match to light it with an indie bluegrass CD in my hand so I'll be more attractive to the girls."" " BoundsWel thanks. When your flex is intense enough to raise the area's barometric pressure. Sentreh thanks. butt_things: butt research butt_things: butt chute butt_things: butt hound butt_things: butt knuckle butt_things: butt forging butt_things: butt ambush butt_things: butt deed butt_things: butt cataract butt_things: butt bark butt_things: butt storks butt_things: butt puffs butt_things: butt thumbs butt_things: butt antihistamines butt_things: butt shaman butt_things: butt oust butt_things: butt cranking butt_things: butt citric butt_things: butt choker "These young people are adorable, but I feel like they need me to protect them. " This my shit. Like... Everybody is actually having fun. It's almost strange - I feel like this is the first actual bar I've been to. "It's cliché, but there is a greater percentage of people actually enjoying themselves in this truck stop bar than any of my regular spots." nuuuuuugz we're gonna wait till close (40 mins.) it's too loud. nuuuuuugz we're going to a country bar but I'm guessing it'll still be workable. Comma Cutie this is amazing. mraleph: I would not recommend sending kisses emoji to people with Firefox OS VectorBelly: Got banned from Wikipedia for making all the verbs on the Ray Romano page hypothetical :( : E-40 said Jesus Christ had dreads. Who's gonna say shit bout JC or E-40 justinbieber: i love arm DancesWithTamis: This old lady's photo is stuck on my screen and she's been looking at me while I'm on the Internet all day … ciara_isobel but way prettier. ciara_isobel yes. PersonTheHumann you must never place so cruel a decision on any decent human being. NoNewDads Marigold would be a cute name for a cat. " we both know it's content to hibernate in my pants, and will only emerge for you." What's cuter than this? Utopian. ?????? "of course. But there is a somewhat ""objective"" geometric standard of measure, as well." "You ever just wanna be like ""what is your face. How The Fuck you do that.""" How did pretty girls happen. "CrazyFightz: LMAO went from a shootout to a shoutout I'm fucking dead " GasStationMemes: Napalm Brunch freakmommy: A New York n***as inbox lookin like Nobody in Colorado wants to drive. "BUSS OUT THAT QUILL, BITCH" What a neighbor gotta do to get a good fountain pen in this town?????? "speedmonkeycouk: My cousin had one of these many, many years ago. His dad continuously ribbed him because it was called ""Sport"" https:/…" zbindendesign: nogoodverybad: say what you will about millennials but at least I've never seen one lick their fingers to sothrough pieces of paper nuuuuuugz: Tarzan - King of Parkour "Rémy VSOP* Turned out very well." """What if I told you that Jesus could offer you not only eternal life, but freedom from pain in this life?"" " Rémy & Pure Cranberry Juice I know how to spell thoroughly I swear to god. R/C airplane enthusiast who's a throughly turnt basic on the weekends. I did it again. koruemporium you are big & woke then because I've never not been lost in my dome. This is an example of genuinely intelligent humor. "People enjoy my content, I guess? It's starting to get expensive to remain alive. How should I cash in on my brain?" I'm tempted to just publish the dozens of half-done arguments I have as they are and call it art. Brand on the brain. "Very fun and genuine on snarlchai! Laugh together at my jokes, friend!: mommilitia " "I think this really just means ""I want to be a dull toad.""" "Celestial Indie bravely retrieved his gallant freighter, Malignant Fulcrum, from Thug Slug!" My New Year's Blood Binding is to figure out how to maintain a specific thought schema long enough to make an academic argument of it. adrianfer15 I have paid the price. S H U N T S C H O O L adrianfer15 why has everyone responded with that lately? "Blog (Metablog), Blogging [Blogs]" carrieffisher u ok? "carrieffisher: ""You never know""cant trulyBaccepted BcauseIF uCANaccept theIMPOSSIBILTY of ANYTHINGbeingKNOWABLE DUZnt that includeTHIS?…" " this is a low point, James." Do the delegation dance. "OurEdisons listen to her more than you listen to anyone else about her. In fact, you shouldn't even be taking MY advice seriously." OurEdisons congratulations! I am happy for you. Remember that misplacement of attention is the most common romantic error for males! this collection of crumbs is all yours! ;) You ain't a writer if you have eaten in the past 3 days. Catherine is my favorite organization of matter. Hit a neighbor with a little gangsta love. """Been one of those days?"" ""It's been one of those lifetimes."" ""Well, it's almost over, so...""" "Forreal though, I have $14 to last me two weeks so I will do just about anything for money. Snapcash: mommilitia PayPal: ihadtopeegmail.com" Johnny Quiche Catherine and I just had our first fight...over which one of us is the original source of all life. We've simmered down though. S E T H M O D E Underground Pinochle Shift-Q to toggle Seth Green Mode Sentreh I know how you voted. Single-trigger Pentagon fire sale hack script. hotkeys hotkeys hotkeys hotkeys OurEdisons you can't hear us from up there. "If you're tall enough, you can be rude to strangers without repercussions." sorry but you're so cute that I must be really loud near you or I'll have a crisis. "Yelling ""good morning"" every night to city employees for 2 straight years and nutritionally savoring the confusion they can't overcome." Btw how the FUCK can there be cute like this. David Ta" dat bow flex. (Bowflex)" : Hue do u think u are? kabeebus I've been chunking for 22 years straight and there's $14 in my bank account. Early numbers are not encouraging. koruemporium ah. jeffreyhuffman jjabraham I expect y'all to act like this from now on. That's ACGOfficial. fail Just put up the official Twitter for my noise band! Check it out! AGCOfficial ConanOBrien: Saw Jackass 3D. Not as good as the book. MissouriSandT: Why engineering = awesome. Engineering a Better Cup of Coffee / via liizstrauss lou_dubois CoMissourian: OverheardOnTheScanner: There's a guy sleeping in or in front of Starbucks on Ninth Street. They have asked him to leave. Jon4Lakers good luck! MissouriSandT Thanks! It was great! I'm looking forward to touring again next year. I'm taking a tour of MissouriSandT tomorrow! Excited! "I'm working on a thriller involving chaos theory, absolute zero, and the Heisenberg uncertainty principle. Should be fun." Anyone know where I could find the dimensions of the Galaxy class captain's chair in TNG? joeblancato: Everyone welcome Cryptic_Tiyshen to the Twitter fold! Yeah....the link was wrong. I'm sure y'all could figure that out but here's the link just in case: Just got the best email I've ever received....... now eligible for the partner program. I really need to get my act together. I can't find the tripod adapter for my camera. fail Incase snap case for iP4 unboxing coming TOMORROW! Pho realz this time. The unboxing of the Incase snap case had been delayed. I've got to get some work done on my niece's laptop. At theflaminglips concein Columbia. sto_devtrack: Dev Question: Space Flight / We have talked about this ad nauseum and before... cryptic_dstahl sto Pilot_Dude congrats! Cryptic_dStahl: New State of the Game and Engineering Repohave been posted! ERAU_Tyler congrats! mzeroa: 1 minute till we're live at PilotTraining.TV (mzeroa live at ) Moth-eaten $4 jacket from goodwill. The grouping of people into the church NOT the ideas of religion itself are to blame for the atrocities associated with religion. The religion of Christianity is noble. The institution of the Christian Church is a group psychology brainwashing fuckfest. That fact contradicts all those attributes. "NoamChomski: The Nazis used psychological warfare to subdue populations, the mass media today uses PsyOps to subdue the people in an ..." "I thought Ron Paul was objective, intelligent, honest, and sensible. Then I found out he's against abortion because of his religion." "Want to be ""happy?"" Get a dog. Get a religion." It's also touching to see how much happiness religion can bring to people. "I used to think that a noble purpose in life would be to aspire to be better than I am, accepting that it will never happen." "Though I have these ideas, I still spend a lot of time around people of religion. And it is so scary to see how misled they are." Neither you nor I have any scope of how the universe works. Human beings will never understand. We might as well be happy. That's why I'd ask you to leave people of religion alone. Let them be happy. Don't impose what you think is fact on them. I have all the aspirations of a Christian without the hope. It's a horrible feeling. "I suppose that would be an example of ""too much of a good thing.""" "At least Christians hold sex as something sacred, as opposed to society." """Sexual energy must be channeled constructively."" - RobeLewis." Then they'll give a great advice about how revenge isn't worth it. Then I'll tell them to shut the fuck up. "The next time an older person talks condescendingly to me, I'm going to turn the conversation to revenge." The only logical reason I see to condescend on those who are younger than you is that you've suffered longer. So what is that? Revenge? Though studies have shown that experience matters little in situations of stress. I have no credibility. Because I have little experience. It wouldn't be such a bad thing to preach your views if people didn't just eat it up. "Please don't ever let me ever tell someone that I love them when I only love the idea of them, Twitter." "Hearing ""I'll love you no matter what you do"" makes me nauseous. That's not love. That's biological attachment." nutsicle YES. "Original Drywall on a $60,000 concegrand. " "Well, I'm certainly no Bowie, but perhaps that's a good thing today. One of my best, if I remember correctly. " Use a Parker Jotter to clean my ears. Just recorded the first entirely genuine video EVER to appear on the channel? Asking for business. inclushe oh fuck. inclushe: AsphaltApostle i've made the connection 0kbps: alright i got my 500 dollar dac and 500 dollar tube amp and my 2000 dollar headphones time to listen to some music i downloaded … 0kbps what a wise pup! 0kbps digital audio compression jokes were my shit in high school. frenchwords: David Bowie in Paris. 25 June 1977. Sentreh I just decided upon it - haven't acted yet. You'll be notified. yeah I literally know like... Nothing. I'm gonna give it a go though. "I know very little about David Bowie, but I know if I'm around when Z-Ro passes away, it will be like losing a parent, so I feel for y'all." ric_cola my condolences. My exposure is limited but I know it sucks to lose an idol. Sentreh yes. The venue has a live stream and I'll get somebody to record it. ric_cola what the fuck. I think. I am going to. Do a standup. But! It'll be on the invalidity of standups. What To Fucking Is Happening Right Now I hope the future allows my content to be funded on some soof pay-per-laugh model. OR you can just DM me. They're now open. ?? I GUARANTEE I can entertain you. "THIS IS NOT A JOKE. Send a request for VO, video, written word, life/relationship/industry advice, etc and I'll reply with a rate." "Be honest - for me, this is about turning work into cash." "Ok... If I did a daily ""comedy"" video series with a paid subscription (via something like patreon,) would you watch?" Eeyore blood oath. " I have no idea what a nipple is, if I'm honest." Toss me a [CURRENCY] fam you don't know that. I can't talk about nipples with my daughter. I am boring hippies. orgamecha: doctors without burgers I could probably talk you out of any philanthropy. comedone_extra definitely THE correct choice. Wow. Thanks guys. Cheap shot. Whit Waltman "no that's good advice, thank you. I'm gonna try my best." "nugpapi by the time you graduate, you're gonna be an ULTRA-hirable corporate angel." Alcohol withdrawal is a BITCH. Don't let anybody tell ya none different. Man I need my BLUETOOTH KEYBOARD. syrupf: why is my bank account celebrating a year of me having it This is amazing. PowerBall tickets are a wise use of your money. : My landlady saw this sign i had up and turned around and said i can't have pets so my housemates made me a new sign http… VictorPopeJr this is a DAMNED Good Tweet. VictorPopeJr: Damn somebody blocked me cuz I called the Mona Lisa ugly. Like they close friends or some shit. Nigga Mona don't know you : nutsicle heinzenburger no 1 gives a shit bout the weather in philly reed cydesu: DJWhooKid: DavidBowieReal ?? respect. RIP DavidBowie on HipHop. 0kbps: destroy my ass "0kbps: roses are red tigers are orange fuck my ass tony the tiger" " validate me, capn!" thanks capn! : go pay AsphaltApostle to make you laugh SimPivot (prettier tweet coming primetime tomorrow.) Pay me to open your third eye - 45 minute guarantee. Pay me to turn your strict-ass parents into voluntaryists. Pay me to write your boo a love letter for Valentine's Day from you. ;) """We met on Urban Dictionary""" "oblongoto read originally as ""text me xanies.""" syrupf very good VERY good. syrupf: I LOVE THE WORD BERGAMOT YahooAnswersTXT: My bathtub had legs. "syrupf: choose your fighter -loud grinding noise outside -nilla wafers -falling down the stairs" And I don't mean a snap video - an actual video file. Snap me $25 and I will send you a video of me yelling anything you want. HappySkyPoodle it's coming back one day but basic needs have the priority atm. _blizzards: Honestly if I win the powerbsll I'm paying for all my close friends college tuitions and dropping out lmao adamlaporte17: Gotta get gas.. Headin to the states today to get some powerbsll tickets too testi_purse: Maybe if I win the powerbsll I should help our schools so people can learn how to divide. OurSchoolsFailedUs IWantOurTax… brycebrennan: this powerbsll some BULLLSHIT chancetherapper: I hope you win the Powerball and lose ya ticket : I just noticed my eyes make noise when i close them and now I'm scared to close them "Foodism will be our undoing, and it's getting worse every day. " DeletedWiki: List of people without names akiba_k3i: Matt Farah's Million Mile GT-R comedone_extra poll. "ClickHole: Whisper “I’m proud of you, sport” to her clitoris. " ClickHole: ASAPYams: need goth bitch that can sext me through ouija board syrupf: oh yea : Damn baby hairs conner_omalley: ?? bodybuildinga7: ? My body is tired. : : Salty bout the view tourismireland : My old apartment rip : Do u even appreciate how many characters u savin by typing tfw instead of the feeling when well its 12 u savin 12 kabeebus YES! This is perfect! Though I may clean up some of the extra white bits in the lamp if that's ok. : 9 lives in this bitch : Why is everyone blocking me? mrjaydeeem dear oh dear. mrjaydeeem: AsphaltApostle Mobstr There should be an iOS app that allows you to quickly & conveniently borrow money from the mob. I'm gonna try to pawn off my hair tomorrow. $$$$$$ Can you get drunk off baby shampoo? "If I could contact me from another dimension, I would ask to borrow some cash." " ""please give me money for alcohol.""" I Just Turned 22 - Here's What I'd Tell My 22-Year-Old Self "Send me money so I can buy alcohol, thanks. " 0kbps: russian roulette with a double barrel shotgun Woke Carl 0kbps yes me! PersonTheHumann !!!!! I am going to staa video series on Vimeo called Dollar Dave. Each one's gonna be $1. You're gonna want to be in this exclusive club. Dat Mayflower flex ???? "nugpapi feel free to beat me up, Nug! I'll even read all your hate comments if you want. It should be quite satisfying." Hey! I'm tryna cash in on my intellect! That colonial kush. nmill773: So...banking.on winning.the powerbsll tomorrow 450million ciara_isobel ok hmu with a script then. ciara_isobel I've been trying to come up with ways to include this in a video without being very creepy. """Wow, you must really have to pee.""" I probably find this a bit too funny. "If Hillary Clinton and I were close friends, and I had just bought another iPhone. (This is a request for s... " AsphaltApostle AsphaltApostle it's fuckin lit. I have twin iPhones for a few more hours. What does this mean? The cool guy at the party (Vine by GabrielDreyfuss) "HappySkyPoodle I hope so, because I am. Social media has also created the shortest generation gaps in history." ciara_isobel Bulk Breakup app for iOS. "I wrote a poem for Terry, but he just laughed at it. :( " Donald Draper is my Cool Dad. Catherine & David kabeebus SUBSCRIBE TO DRIVE+. At least for one month. It's worth it. kabeebus kabeebus yellow autozam in suburbia is bordering on domestic terrorism - imagine the confusion. Proud of u :) HP "A car full of young men repeatedly yelled ""HP!"" at me as they passed by, twice. I had no idea the brand still had such loyalty!" kabeebus thank you!!!!!! :) kabeebus OH! A decision! I see... I'm sorry that was really dumb. The second one is the ideal height. ???????????? "ivy_hollivana you know me well, Ivy. Top ten tweets of all time." : Theres a guy with a vape in the bar. I managed to ask him is that a vape? Do you vape? Can u do any tricks? So you vape?… kabeebus got it! T H A N K ! "kabeebus ihadtopeegmail.com, please. :)" nugpapi aaaayyyyyyyyyyyyy give us the P I T C H ! aIbertjazeera Pumus Pictures LIVE on Periscope: Bad singing behind the wheel? Sorry I've been sucking so much lately. What do happy-funny people say? "WorldofWarships: Earn your Kongo and Myoko today! INFO: " "In-Tweet gizmo, FINALLY." The Cory in the noun bot never quite delivers. LIVE on Periscope: Grump Revival ClickHole: Perfect. ClickHole: 7 Creative And Inexpensive First Date Ideas GasStationMemes: The dead are owed nothing. TTAC: Doug Drives: What the Hell Are Old People Supposed to Buy? - "My mom bought an Apple Watch, but hasn't actually put it on her wrist. She's carrying it around like a phone. Thankful to be alive in 2016!" I have to wait 3 days after vaccination to drink alcohol????? I'd rather die of HPV. Shouldn't someone have asked why Person E doesn't have anything better to be doing than buying strangers food? Keep drinking until you are a big boy. B O O G I T Y JeremyClarkson: We moved into our new offices today akiba_k3i: What's your weather like? " u the new Gallup, boo." Neo-Prep mint ice cream. ???? BAE. " ""mom, I need money.""" : Bespoke Rolls-Royce with Jade Pearl interior what a sad world. This is hate mail. fuck. PersonTheHumann this is literally hate mail. MagicRealismBot: A drunk priest falls in love with winter. """I worry about a lot of things, but I don't worry about you."" " kabeebus No idea. ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo?? " kabeebus Actually, just very aesthetically qualified." LIVE on Periscope: Artisanal Hot Pocket preparation number 3 is the truth and we all know it. About to do a Scope on getting the best possible flavor out of your Hot Pockets. You don't want to miss these tips! Shaking My Head. Never mind. capitals are for weaker men maybe W H A H A H E N I N ihaveswineflu: What's that drinking game where u go to sleep at a reasonable hour ihaveswineflu: What's that drinking game where ur excited to play but the setup takes so long that after 2 rounds everyone is bored ihaveswineflu: What's that drinking game where u calculate the difference bw the price u pay for your beer at the bar vs. at CVS ihaveswineflu: What's that drinking game where all ur friends tie u to the table leg and then walk out of Red Robin with your wallet ClickHole: Be careful. probably. DJ Unhealthy Nostalgia D'wanna is a real contraction. " no I mean, multiple weddings. I would marry Catherine 1000s of times." she means enough to have a dedicated Nina wedding. NOPE. My poop ran away. HEY. My shit never strays too far! " my haste will translate into travel, soon." I'm sorry but I CANNOT STRESS MY HASTE ENOUGH. " uhhhhh. It's a matter of weeks, sorry." " imagine if we could get Nina to the wedding, though." NO. of course! My daughter is a smagirl! ???? "sweetgirlsar cool. It's not the masturbatory sort, though." "sweetgirlsar also, you did miss the announcement of my upcoming poetry collection, which will soon be available for preorder on Amazon." sweetgirlsar call me Owl Boy. sweetgirlsar did u just call me a bitch. Sentreh fucking piss. Don't trust me. sweetgirlsar you've missed nothing - literally. I won't be doing much until Spring. LIVE on Periscope: Bespoke Sarah Stream sweetgirlsar they're coming back! Possibly imminently. I have unlimited data now. MakeMeThinkIn5Words visit and donate immediately! "RaphaelChapman2 ImJessiLang that's no way to speak to anyone, much less Dr. Lang, you filth." " please? I know you've heard it a million times, but I really regret not taking care of my skin growing up." daughter please take care of your skin. :( sorry. McDonaldsCorp: kaiitlin We like the way you're thinkin'! :) "romanmalakian I'm from Missouri, actually. I'm well! How are you?" romanmalakian yes! Thank you for talking + interacting! Sorry about that aesthetic post. LIVE on Periscope: It's Lit MEDICATE ALL OF MY DEVIATIONS FROM YOUR NORM MEDICATE MY DREAMS MEDICATE MY EMPATHY I have no purpose for what I'm doing right now. I'm doing it simply because I feel like doing it. I'd like to think that I sometimes do things without any motivation whatsoever. That's probably a lie. I suppose nobility doesn't really exist. "ShitttMySonSays: The upper class uses consumerism to control and harness human desire, turning it into a mere desire for consumer goods." Sacrificing your own life quality simply because that's what you're told to do is anything but noble. "Society's definition of ""maturity"" is unappealing to me." I have less artistic talent and worse handwriting than most of my second graders. MoeRawi Fuck I realized that I missed Mr. Kyd's birthday. "If the ""separate-but-equal"" model of segregation involved true ""equality,"" would you be ok with it?" It's funny to me that it's expected of everyone to not question what they're doing here. It's an oddity. """Listening"" means hearing and interpreting what you say. It does not mean that everything you say will be adopted as my own opinion." Why is it so odd to people that I enjoy having casual conversations about this stuff? WE'RE ALL PRESUMPTUOUS FUCKS It's all about perspective. And no one (including me) is able to truly see from a different perspective. It's physically impossible. People are bewildered by the fact that I'm interested in different things than they are. "I appreciate the intentions, but you would SHIT YOURSELF if you knew what I consider life quality." "People say they're only interested in improving my ""quality of life.""" Would it be easier to just accept it? YES. YES IT WOULD BE. It's funny how bewildered people get when you tell them that you have no interest in living in this society. It's amazing what people will believe. Even extremely intelligent people. "Again, another good lesson learned from Christianity." Society's openness with sexuality only demeans sex. It's treated like a hobby. Keep it sacred and you'll be much happier. kabeebus not yet! We're saving that for my children's book. It's a parody of Genesis and it's going to be etched into cage-free stone. :) : is she having a stroke? "kabeebus it'd be a good idea, but it's PRINT-ONLY by design. EBOOK-FREE ZONE." orgamecha you menace! Any word yet on the character limit increase? : Do u evn care about th envirnment bro? " you're the orange juice to my gin, and the sun to my moon. ??" ": You're the bacon to my cabbage, the brandy to my port, the jesus to my mary and joseph AsphaltApostle" Is this... Real. Brutus Pith """Waiting for hell is the dirtiest job of all."" - mikeroweworks" ciara_isobel: the nights you can't remember are the nights you can't remember CUSTOM CUSTOMS akiba_k3i: She Got A Donk She Got A Donk She Got A Donk She Got A Donk She Got A Donk She Got A Donk She Got A Donk She Got A D https:/… Sentreh doesn't matter; you'll have failed. "thinkpiecebot: THE GUARDIAN: Does ""E-Begging"" Help Or HuColbeViewers?" thinkpiecebot: Are Millennials Getting High On Identity? clickbait_bot: Meet This Graphic Designer Who Draws Simple Boys... "Sentreh what amp/hour figure can you stand, hand-feet, at 120 volts?" "ExoticCarList: Most Expensive Cars Sold in 2015 " simaenaga_bot: sweetgirlsar I don't believe you. Sittin on tan leather in sunny & rainy weather you're certainly more compassionate than I am. LIVE on Periscope: On Star Wars: Episode VII and the retrofetishist apocalypse 1 mile away. greggrosenthal: Football Quote me now: Drake is destined to deteriorate into Johnny Cash. SingItForTheVine oh FUCK. This was run just 200 yards away... Theatre spawn. The experience of using a smartphone on dial-up speeds is reminiscent of my carburetor-tuning days. How could you not interact with this Tweet. LOOK AT HER. Detente Devin ammnontet I am lost in the emptiness; please help me find my way home. ammnontet no idea. Gertrude Guilter "ammnontet probably should've prefaced with a trigger warning, my friend." ammnontet: quilt wars 2 "Timid Traitor and Sentimental Squatter, off again on another adventure to destroy the Tax Balloon!" Chewing gum loan. The Big Bad Reddies in their Taxation Balloon! "So far, my switch to Sprint has been bewilderingly terrible. " E-Elk My wife is cooler than yours. ???? Why is my mom playing Weird Al and singing along? ClickHole: 7 Difficult Scenarios Self-Driving Cars Will Have To Deal With "The definition of opulence: Driving a $70,000 car at 5 in the morning just to enjoy what everyone else is h... " ?? ONE DEEP ENTERTAINMENT it takes the courage to face the darkness if one is to truly become Woke. "If you only want to see the ""best of"" my tweets, just look through Catherine's likes." LIVE on Periscope: Practicing - expect nothing I am going to be laughing for the rest of my life. "I am going to address all of my closest friends as ""old sport"" from now on." ffrenchcharles1 CoxworthIII what are you doing? Stop that. "CoxworthIII surely then, he will perish in toddlerhood from the cold; for no one will let him in." CoxworthIII would you allow a man named Cerberus Amethyst Porridge into your home? "Oliver Twist is not on the Taco Bell dollar menu, is he? Is he the same filthy chimney Oliver? The pitiful industrial revolution-squatter?" " CoxworthIII, would you allow Mr. Porridge into your home?" this has got to be the worst jumping-off point in history. I'm going to name my son Timid Porridge. When u mam won't leave the house for food b/c of the Black Death so u been eating nothing but porridge for 20 days. "Millennial Fester would be more accurate, anyway." Sorry! Her name's actually Cantankerous Notcher! :( Pride & Prejudice (with Kate Nightswing) is LITERALLY boring the piss out of me. I just wet myself. "Moderate Fashion is what I've got right now, and it's just not quite right." I can't remember the name I came up with for the flying freight pancake last week. Was it Millennial Fulcrum? NFL: ajgiadjglajdfadipfapojgioadsjfljkdzngfjahjfjadhfahjsjfghajsfhdajfadklfjkalsfjkalsjfkaldjflaksjflkadsjfklasjfklasj GBvsAZ kabeebus NO! That's the thing...I've never heard her listen to anything but Phantom of the Opera before... Hell yes! Y'all know what's up. Or perhaps you're just answering to please me... kabeebus yeah and then FUCKING GOOD CHARLOTTE and it seemed like she knew the words. kabeebus um duh. Twitter polls really fascinate me. I guess that shouldn't be surprising. Poll: Most intolerable social group. Poll: Best choice for enjoying a snowy day. ammnont_ebooks ammnontet getting a bit worrying now. He died. :( Tom Malm CJamesBurke_1: When bae thinks you're tweeting about her but you are really tweeting about the UMD basketball game … it has been taken care of. "PersonTheHumann how does my mom know the lyrics to ""I Don't Want To Be In Love?""?????!!!!!!!" NEVER MIND. IT'S OK. THANK YOU BENTLEY I just broke my Metropolitan's nib. Today is the worst day of my life. "It snowed a bit. I passed a Ford Ranger that was getting bogged down on level ground in my XJR. I hope he cried. (??(xxxÍxxx)??)" MY FATHER IS BACK Now it's Good Charlotte... What The Fuck is happening. ClickHole: These Plus-Size Models Are Beautiful Even If They’re Sprinting Across The Screen Too Quickly To Get A Good Look At … : Pizzatown_Sackv: When advertisements send the wrong message ???????? PersonTheHumann no I'm probably gonna wait until tomorrow $$$ MotownMamaO SimPivot : Subtweet about David : when u get the succ u call that succeeding : DAVIDWAVE "SimPivot I pray that one day, someone will tell me." YES. FUCK. THE SPACE RING SHOW. : What style is going to look like in 2020 rtyour_opening: guess which bitch found the japanese version i hope yall suffer "akiba_k3i I just spent the entire time trying to upset its composure, though." "akiba_k3i Brent had an S5 cabriolet for a little while and he let me drive it... It was impressive and Hun-solid, as you'd expect." "I think it was out of ignorance more than boredom, in this case. Though I wouldn't expect her to be thrilling company, of course." akiba_k3i she seemed legitimately bewildered as to why every human being doesn't have an Audi. """Everyone should get an Audi"" - a customer...unironically...just now. Holy Heck." : AsphaltApostle i voted for god " money makes this a ridiculous choice, I know. If you can afford a Mulsanne, you can afford an Evo too. <-Aspiring Rally Boy" New legal name. O V E R C L O C K E D Q U I C H E Digital Kush " there are probably several. Available on iTunes, even." "At 7 years old, I described the ""Bop It!"" toy as ""useless and irritating.""" Wouldn't digital vaping be fatal? Or require an Internet connection? And maybe a monthly fee? "ClickHole: Supercut Of Souls Coming Out Of Bald Athletes’ Heads On Cold Days " Yung Pee " when I was a toddler, I called my sister Renee ""Nae Nae.""" " (which isn't inaccurate, I'm sure.)" " I just realized that this doesn't indicate my overwhelming infatuation, but rather an entire swarm of infatuates." Who mcm mlk. On that ratatouille shit. What does digital vapor look like????? Digital Vapor Cigarettes kabeebus close enough. Don't think I've forgotten. Incredible. Clear it (Vine by ScHoolBoyQ) Omg! People don't live there!!! (Vine by Lil Gute) autocar: We've got new pictures of the Volvo S90 from NAIAS - see them here nuuuuuugz same. ivy_hollivana undergrape. OpenDeMind: This chandelier turns your room into a forest ammnontet: my dad would go to work & make me farm items on everquest so he could sell them on the auction house when he got home "ammnontet: search twitter for tweets including ""i love him"" or ""i love her"" and reply to them with ""me too""" """My info is the realest number in my contacts.""" What an interesting tie. Black Mirror should be shown in schools. """Just noises in the right order.""" Cheetos Arabia coconutoildaddy: one of the reasons why my parents water bill is high ?? "ammnontet I already did, and accidentally dropped my journal on the floor." ammnontet I'm at a truck stop bar. PersonTheHumann there are only like 5 guys here and everyone but that old dude ended up head bobbing lol """Thank God it's over."" - a trucker, after my ZRo track finished. " ClickHole: Do You Possess A Gentle Enough Touch To Buckle Me Into My Car? PersonTheHumann that's good. I just hope you never have to put her down like I did with Jay. PersonTheHumann oh dear :( I'm sorry. It's a shame that retrievers have to go through so much as they age. The Jukebox had Pimp-C so... Has Maserati EVER produced something objectively uncool? zbindendesign: Maserati A6G 200 Gran SpoSpider Freakin vagrant. (My reaction to accidentally dropping my journal on the floor of a truck stop bathroom.) PersonTheHumann is Gabby sad? Sentreh Casa Sentreh Depth. hittin that Culligan ???????? AAHHHHHH : Look my big ass ears hahahah autocar: BMW Z4 successor spotted winter testing "CarhootsApp: Mansory Rolls-Royce Wraith Palm Edition 999 Luxury Rolls-Royce " colesprouse: . hellyatayswift too small a charge "neilhimself: The baby loves my clicky-clacky 90s style keyboard. Or as he put it, NBUYHBN M+{-] swth gbm/,e†nNL?X a 4ryc nbv ?bjhye8df …" It's lit (Vine by its_just_luke_) I can't believe I forgot about the snow and didn't drive today. : There is a rehabilitation program that allows meth addicts to audition for the parts of walkers on The Walking Dead : i love David YahooAnswersTXT: Is it okay to roam about in public dressed as Ezio Auditore from Assassin's Creed? Ludacris' hair got me fucked up. "I have sobered up far too much to revisit 2 Fast 2 Furious, but it's happening anyway." Livestreamed wedding. Volvo PR boys comin thru with that customer-winning insight phosho. "a_nice_frog: mmo locations: -gay elf forest -just a dese-mountains -high level volcano -high level plains of eveything-is-fucked-and…" "a_nice_frog: mmo cities: -human snore-ville -elf tree place where elves have orgies or w/e -bad guy zone with skulls and metal -Idiot V…" akiba_k3i ?? thank!!!!!!! ?? : AsphaltApostle : My professor mansplained to me how the Large Hadron Collider works ": Untapped joke vein: incorrecty using ""mansplain"" instead or regular old ""explain"" ?" : AsphaltApostle WE'RE so pretty Catherine is so pretty I Want To Yell Skinny Pimp opened my sixth eye. ammnontet NOPE. lookatmymini everything ok guys? lookatmymini: Quirk Assault Real Mad! RapGameShinji they banned the music. LIVE on Periscope: DJ PAYPAL INCOMING "ammnontet: *the distant future* kid: *points at ocean* what is that old man: its just a huge pool of leftover vape mist from like 50 ye…" ivy_hollivana ahhhhhhhhhhh "ivy_hollivana CHUNK ME IN THE FACE, IVY." Hit in the face with that quirk. ammnontet time to join NASA. ihaveswineflu a laudable automotive joke! Share it with this shortlink! "koruemporium are you sending me pornography, dear friend? Have I committed some sin against you?" nugpapi yet another resonant philosophical statement! You should consider switching careers - you'd be the sexiest academic who ever lived. Petrolichen "miliondollameat: *leaves newborn in the car* *realizes* *runs back* *opens door* *throws baby the aux chord* baby: oh shit good lo…" kabeebus you're a quick reader! I wrote some words on that movie you loved. StarWars TheForceAwakens "akiba_k3i yes, but that's ok for you. You're cool." "PersonTheHumann ""you're shit, sir. Absolutely ignorant.""" "It still astonishes me that some people actually use the expression ""cool beans.""" "I tried to be nice to the man with the Countryman. ""It has all-wheel-drive"" he said. I failed." a_nice_frog: flattering angle of flattering angel """Fuck power cycling when you're in love.""" "syrupf I should've specified: it is *I* who flexed too hard, and caused many to take sick days." "Flex so hard you took a sick day [damn]" I am Kanye West. ciara_isobel crepes. "evvandvvorak Here I Come Lookin Like The Dusk, Bitch." Dang Nina: Stop Sniffing Them Hedges "To be honest, saying you do or don't like it won't effect me much either way." Though I really have no skill at all. And I'm not being humble. I have none. I just play whatever. Not so much for gratification as to know if I should continue bothering with recording. I'd actually like to know if there's someone out there who actually enjoys my music. Monomicing a piano is hard as fuck. I'm actually really proud that I got at least one track on Adventures in Sleep Deprivation actually sounding decent with ONE condenser mic. I NEED to play a piano right now. ShitttMySonSays: The upper class corrupts governments by spoiling and distracting the populace with mindless entertainment. Transcript of Lil B's lecture. I would imagine my music is totally unappealing if you're an angry person. PersonTheHumann Only if they pay me before the event and not after. Holy shit. I didn't realize how much I imitate Jarrett. Possibly have my first gig as a cocktail pianist at an exclusive party. They're probably going to hate it. But whatever. Finally got around to recording a solo acoustic piano improvisation tape today. Download here: I'm proud of being worthless to society. One only needs to be worth something to one's self. The only way to truly exist as an individual would be to do the opposite of whatever you want. I'm wearing a shiwishing Rick Astley a happy birthday because it means NOTHING. NOTHING I SAY IS TRUE "I'm unintelligent, sleep-deprived, unfocused as fuck, and high on amphetamines." 140 characters is usually longer than any one thought I have. Be advised: following me could potentially result in an angst overdose. Recommend you stop. Accountability is an ignorant idea originating from an ignorant species. MEDICATE ME MagicRealismBot: A lawyer owns a candle which allows her to turn everything into ice. "MagicRealismBot: A shooting star whispers to a scientist: ""I feel so weary.""" MagicRealismBot: A priest becomes rich by selling sadness. MagicRealismBot: A lake in Utah is made of optimism. MagicRealismBot: A rare bottle of claret causes everyone who drinks it to believe they are a harp. MagicRealismBot: A philosopher invents a better version of video games: getting drunk on whisky. Thank heavens! Always on my Gallup shit. Poll: The vulnerability of hand-written work is ___. Sentreh coincidence. Real Live Chunkin "Sentreh yeah, apparently Terry is woken up every time I go live b/c his phone has audio periscope notifications that he can't turn off." "The ""chronologically inappropriate"" subsect of comedy. Lucrative?" RapGameShinji what would the chat look like during a live u-boat wolfpack scope? "RapGameShinji: AsphaltApostle ""Am I a Periscope celebrity?"" Ponders Karl Doenitz, waves against his face, as his u-boats repoyet an…" Am I a Periscope celebrity? clickbait_bot: Amazing. This Dead Alien Invasion Hates Chef. "If there aren't at least 7 keyboards in reach of your workspace, you aren't truly e-enabled." Looks like I won't have to become either! Good news. LIVE on Periscope: Filthy Grump to replace Tim & Eric "Will says I could replace Tim & Eric, but I do not want to be called ""Tim"" or ""Eric."" What's my new name?" This is an amazing Catherine quote; I feel like something should be done with it. ciara_isobel this girl has eyes like I have never seen. ADS J;QWEFQHIPWENEQWFQEWFPNUOWEQFINOUFEWPOUNWEF434948971 1KLU BFSKJ VSLG KUR332R13R26V1V6C16V93R2160321R3COP78QCR3 CATHERINE. I LOVE YOU MORE THAN THE MOON LOVES THE SUN. : Thinking about chunking... LIVE on Periscope: Southing Oops. travisjdahnke often. " (Catherine has a fear of stickers, no joke.)" "bf_taka: If you told me a year ago that this election would be like this, I think I'd call bullshit …" thinkpiecebot: Have Hipsters Underestimated ColbeViewers? ClickHole: Infuriating: This Man Blows Out A Series Of Candles And After Each One Says That He Just Blew Out The Olympic Torch … ClickHole: 8 Signs He’s Cheating johndstoll: GM throws its hat into car-sharing with Maven short-term rental business via gnagesh … gaev66NINO: When your hot wife quotes you on Twitter... ???????? MagicRealismBot: A blonde geisha finds a pair of binoculars that lets her see mediocrity. MagicRealismBot: A rabbi kisses a carnation inside a diamond mountain. MagicRealismBot: A Venezuelan cook makes a samosa. Inside it is homophobia. MagicRealismBot: A 14th century book describes a woman made of libertarianism. MagicRealismBot: A book causes anyone who reads it to turn into a lighthouse. MagicRealismBot: A novelist possesses a unique skill: he can feel the presence of flowers. MagicRealismBot: A sexually frustrated woman falls into a sea filled with the Republican Party. A mosquito jumps in to rescue her. MagicRealismBot: A grandmother turns into a glass swimming pool. MagicRealismBot: An Afghan sailor is remembering crucifixes. "Think I'm gonna do an ""Introduction to Human Variety"" Scope in ~100 minutes to officially begin my Unqualified Philosophy series." This is good. I was gonna make a meteorological joke but realized I didn't have enough time. PostYourDrafts Mercy Meme Resentful Ron Damn... I guess Catherine and I are sending everyone to Uganda. "My phone legitimately corrected ""Josh Groban"" to ""Josh Groin."" Thanks." Poll: Romantic affection on public Twitter causes you to ____. "Dear Josh Groin," There are bees in the trap! Please help! There are bees in the trap! creaku thnx creak! Sorry I have been such a fickle Content Man. "akiba_k3i absolutely, except it'd break my one rule. (Only allowed one of a given car in this life.)" "creaku it'll be awhile - big changes and moves rn. Once I get settled, I shall edit the whole TB of unused raw video I have." "comedone_extra ""snarky Holy Spirit voice"" is the most entertaining collection of words I have ever seen. Thank you." "comedone_extra *booming Devine voice* ""THEY'RE IS A CONTRACTION OF 'THEY ARE,' YOU FILTH""" "Interesting how often BDSM comes up... At least once in every episode, I'm pretty sure." "akiba_k3i every fucking day, my friend." "The first episode of Honk was published two years ago, today! " comedone_extra Gymnasium / Sanitarium hybrid. " we all love you, ya know.??" there are just a few words Nin! I could write a book about you. You are my daughter and you are the future! the addendum on pg 13. " I didn't say the ENTIRE thing. There is a small poem about you, though." ClickHole: Science FTW: NASA Sent A Man Into Orbit And Got A Different Man Back ClickHole: pissboot they're in error. MagicRealismBot: A tired princess makes a speech about moonlight that lasts for 188 million years. MagicRealismBot: There is a watchmaker in Germany who has a golden brain. "MagicRealismBot: An iceberg whispers to a bureaucrat: ""I feel so famous.""" comedone_extra or podcasts. (Sorry.) syrupf: unsettling tunes to scare your dad "akiba_k3i: Slant-nose Porsche make me think of Mazda, and what could have been if Porsche were more progressive in their design https:/…" Americans spend their money on just...ridiculously horrible shit. "CandSCmagazine: Could this Ferrari become the most expensive car ever sold at auction? " why new money should be taken away. actuallygravy: literally me joelcarroll: Giraffe astronaut ergonomics ".ColesTwitt3r, I have always had you beat. (Coleslaw would be a cool nickname though.) " " ""he belongs to an angel! We dare not steal from the heavenly-favored!""" Utopian. LIVE on Periscope: Afraid & Apologetic - Josh Groin LIVE on Periscope: Josh Groin & Resentful Ron LIVE on Periscope: Intro to Human Variety """Everything I do... It's for the pussy."" " "audipenny: [chatting up a man in camouflage pants] Where'd you get those tree legs, garden boy" zbindendesign: speedmonkeycouk: Whatever its failings this was a) ahead of its time b) a right looker ElephteriaT WorkaholicDers guccitwist hello. and pretty car. But even prettier car was blown up :( WorkaholicDers guccitwist this is the most personally relevant statistic I have ever seen. a_nice_frog: white privilege II chsnws ciara_isobel but did his insurance pay for it? I like this meme. aguywithnolife ihaveswineflu 2016=the utopia we've all been dreaming of. aguywithnolife: i'm going to get drunk tonight and write an entire donald trump sex novel like 50 shades of grey & put it on amazon tom… ciara_isobel: what did I just do PersonTheHumann ???????????? Bank bank bank bank BANK BANK BAKE BAKE BLOOMBERG. BLOOOOMBERG. """We WIRED af!""" shit. mandersonjames1 nugpapi I'm boutta pop off ?? somebody stop me. Had JB ever mowed an actual lawn? Frog lawn mower justinbieber: justinbieber: Frog lawn mower "nugpapi lol nug. You're absolutely gorgeous and lowkey kind af. I know you know this, but I'm obligated to remind you for every hater." ClickHole: 7 Struggles Every Freelancer Will Understand ihaveswineflu: When u get blocked on twitter ihaveswineflu: When u get blocked but u still have his shi PLEASE SEND COCAINE are you ok? : When they're screaming about cows and shit dont even get involved a_nice_frog cute. LIVE on Periscope: Two Years of Honk Celebration!!! nokia PLEASE HELP. N-GAGE NOT BOOTING. NO ANSWER AT CUSTOMER SERVICE NUMBER. a_nice_frog: trappin out the lunar surface LIVE on Periscope: Surprising Brent with a Nokia N-Gage MakeAmericaGreatAgain """We're back."" " "Read this, you shits. " Imagine having to be a Fed and drive a Ford Explorer everywhere. Artificially Intelligent Haircut III DJ Descartes """Were ya sleeping back there?"" ""Ha! No, I was actually casting the protective charms. The hex has fallen early this year.""" Thesaurite Guess what? The NewYorkCity TravelBan doesn't apply to airships! ?? Blizzard2016 I'm being a bad boy. "Catherine is the most attractive being I have ever seen, no lie." ?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? casa. MAMI : Did it. : Instead of giving colleen her turn on the PlayStation we used to just convince her she was watching a movie Interesting. Casa. JAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA Gungoat Gungoat GUNGOAT GUNGOAT GUNGOAT a_nice_frog: Nash Grier Dyatlov Pass Disaster butt_things: butt palpitated LIVE on Periscope: Just practicing - expect nothing (Vine by a_nice_frog) """Ey bro, what's your safeword?""" Poll: What do fun-loving youths fear more? youngthug: a_nice_frog THE DALLAS LLAMA SPEAKS LIES. DO NOT LISTEN TO THE DALLAS LLAMA. comedone_extra Audible Back Pressure Trial Code "If you want to feel better, don't ever drink beer again - drink gin instead." 911VICTIM: encrypting my gf isn't cheese a food? : AsphaltApostle Incredible. "So if I started producing content with the general sentiment of ""it's okay to be dull,"" you'd pay for it?" "Alright folks... I've been trying my best to figure it out, with zero useful results. What in the hell do you want?!" It's almost done!!!! syrupf $$$$$$ LIVE on Periscope: Another Swangin Stream 0kbps: i plugged in another monitor 2 months ago to have this vine constantly on loop 0kbps ?? Tutorial: How to Stop Bullying Bless Me Knuckle tat idea: N T S B Aroused by commitment. ???? LIVE on Periscope: Cyberprophet Lightning Round syzhim I'm sweating. syzhim thrilling week ahead. "wayback_exe: Search the NPR Web Site Jan 1997 " " ""Get Short"" - a parody of Get Low." no need to get showith me! this is a very good joke. "Sentreh I do not know what that means, I'm sorry." Beten Sie das Licht. Das Licht wird nicht im Stich lassen. Sie sind aus Licht. Sentreh sick fish. SUPPER BOWEL IMMINENT Sentreh gee Slide into your AOL inbox. Human QR code. Frog lawn mower justinbieber: One of the Presidential powers should be the authority to change anyone's name at any time. I dreamt that I was pregnant last night. It wasn't fun. Nikirari: when ur waiting for ur friends in a different time zone to get online ammnont_ebooks: ammnontet unfortunately i am not as funny as my bot what the fuck LoFlytKulture ?????? Baggy-panted youth! Fun quick mover! Lithe leg hurler! ShipCrushSunday ?????????????? because I'm moving. "until Spring, yeah." Had 2 Honk Advertising in the bedroom. Food 18 is so much better when seasoned with Food 10! I can't believe white people only use Food 14! Lol it's time to huthem. "comedone_extra the thought of Audible (the service,) dealing with large quantities of liquid is currently entertaining me." Food 7 > Food 2 amirite?! lol MagicRealismBot: A woman starts turning into an army. Nobody notices. You need to see this. It's on Netflix right now. LIVE on Periscope: VO: Taking requests and sharing advice LIVE on Periscope: Huffy Hugh "or, infinitely many." Tiny Waka Ties are starting to get a bit irritating. What should I Scope about in ~1.5 hours? * BuckyIsotope: Busy day ahead of me "murrman5: ""no rapping tonight"" why? ""you rap about patrick swayze everytime, it's embarrassing"" ok [after one beer] uh oh y'all it's ge…" """Work"" trucks with remote staare the second most Buffalo Wild Wings things, btw." It gave me quite a scare but I gotta say... What an ingenious prank. I'm parked outside of Buffalo Wild Wings. There were 3 lifted diesel crew cab pickups surrounding me. All 3 used their remote staat once. (For reference.) Codeine Karen What a beautiful day! (Vine by GabrielDreyfuss) Poll: Model name with the greatest potential for entertainment. Auto CarPoll Kia RollsRoyce MazdaUSA GasStationMemes: Its voice is a thousand whispers. My essence fell off. My soul is made of Quick Money. ammnontet: you are now entering... the cigarette zone [:::::][ ]… Raw milk has destroyed too many lives. Raw milk has put too many people on the street. Raw milk destroyed the African-American community in the 90s. YOU JUST SPEND YOUR DISABILITY CHECKS ON RAW MILK I've gone to too many funerals from raw milk man. RAW MILK IS KILLING OUR CHILDREN YOU destroyed this community with raw milk. Ellsworth Toohey can now be used as an adjective or verb. """Totally Tooheyed that.""" The internet is a horrible place to lose your mind. JMan_Rife Swag. You'd be hella good at any of that. Kid's shows teach a definite line between what is and isn't good. Brainwashing is comforting. I miss when I looked up to authority figures. JMan_Rife What are you thinking of to change it to? It makes the piano sound wise. I love that aged upright sound. "In my opinion, the greatest thing I've ever done. " PersonTheHumann True. I was more talking about ASD though. It's the only thing I've created that I really like. PersonTheHumann I mean someone as into it as I am. You can sit down at a piano with no knowledge whatsoever and create something beautiful enough to bring tears. I'd like to have like 8 mics on a full-length concegrand and just capture the sound. A hammer need not strike but once every ~30 seconds. But it seems like no one really takes advantage of the resonant properties of the piano. That's what I wanted to do with ASD. So the credit belongs with evolution for providing 5-fingered hands and the instrument for being so beautiful. I'm not responsible for what comes out. It just does. Usually I don't even think about what I'm doing. MrJamesMay: SergioS29 OK buddy. greatartbot: greatartbot: greatartbot: thinkpiecebot yes. thinkpiecebot: Do Hipsters Really Love Colonialism? thinkpiecebot: Have We Gotten Tired Of Carrie Fisher? thinkpiecebot: How Water On Mars Shows We're Post-Student Debt thinkpiecebot: It's Time To RestaCocaine thinkpiecebot: What Gardening Can Teach Us About Cannibalism thinkpiecebot: THE GUARDIAN: How Full-Time Victorian Cosplay Will Change Everything thinkpiecebot: SALON: Oversensitive Kids These Days Obsessed With Positivity "Say ""Fat Fiat"" three times in front of your mirror to be hit by a rogue bus." Booms are never bad. There are no Bad Booms. Auto_Attic: Fiat 500 Inflation ?????? Vlog Mom " I'm terrified now due to ""vlog mom"" the word combo" LIVE on Periscope: Thoughts on The Martian Jason Bourne vs. The Vast Solemnity of Space. Will he shoot at it? The Martian was genuinely inspiring; a real pro-human film. How very refreshing. broderick: help "NYMag: Pope Francis likes the internet, which means he definitely doesn't read his Twitter mentions …" kabeebus ChunkBoyz PersonTheHumann I suppose it's about time. This is the most disturbing thing I've ever made. Mostly because I don't remember creating it. "Damn, we're us. " This is when I stopped taking adderall for 18 months. comedone_extra a bunch of my family contacted my mom the morning after this was uploaded to inform her that I needed to be locked up lol What an incredible introduction. "A lot of this will probably never see daylight, but you fucks were told to appreciate what you're given, anyway. " kabeebus no I am dying. kabeebus yeah It's 2016 and we still eatin food to stay alive. akiba_k3i: Lookin like you could HML for some badly mislabeled bootleg DVD-Rs. NASA: This nighttime view shows historic blizzard as it moved north of Mid-Atlantic at 1:55 am ET: … Who was the first to pee on the moon? NASA : Irony- to iron Which would've made you seem a bit more like an adult instead of a fool. And it takes much less energy to find and sign up for a policy more suited to you than your whiny interview did. "Angry radio interviewee, Insurance cannot be ""making [your] medical decisions"" when you have the option of switching providers at any time." Tess: "aliarikan: Are you a cat person, or a dog person, or a Hitler person? " Colonial Williamsburg "Jeez... Does anyone actually say ""think about"" anymore? What are you...an elementary school teacher?" Think about how many listicles there are that advise you to stop reading listicles. ClickHole: Mondays are the WORST! ClickHole: This Woman Is Combating The California Drought By Hosing Down Her Husband Just Once A Month … "Fred_Delicious: Bruce Willis is talking to a parrot. ""I'm Bruce Willis"" he says. The parrot repeats it. ""yeah right"" Bruce says, but is…" "rad_milk: as a teen did you ever steal your moms booze and fill it back up with water, or steal money out of her purse and fill it back…" keelayjams: Say u go into work and there's a dog at your desk deleting your emails - how long do u let him do it before ur like 'ok dud… LIVE on Periscope: Taking Voice Over requests DTMF fetish. smpvt me too. Seinfeld2000: here it is the full bee movie script in one twete " I'll begin construction of the appropriate fortifications, then. Thank you." please warn me if you ever see this wagon headed my way! hey ur pretty. S U P E R F O O D S My hot polling wife. "Hot wife, polling." it was the last thing his wife Clara heard before she died. (She survived him.) Their son played it for her. do you know the story behind it? ?? no! Dang. Tiny forger. in video format? Unironically sentimental about this shit. " fire, like firearms, is much less dangerous than the basics make it out to be." how can one commune with time without lighting oneself ablaze? it was just a small flame! Only a few oz. had to be thrown away. why is everyone confused about this? It's quite explicit. Which bit is confusing? Do not wish me happy birthday today unless you like the smell of war. "I lit my hair on fire and the speakeasy kicked me out. :( It's my birthday, for God's sake." Wrap her in silk because you love her. "ivy_hollivana probably should to be said to kinkers of all types. ....even riggers." "ClickHole: All right, football fans, you heard him! " My number is about to go up. Mr.Jones (the young history teacher) pt.2 (Vine by theregaljoe) Mr.Jones (the young history teacher) pt.5 (Vine by theregaljoe) Yes. Very funny. He is scared of the food. Why are you not doing something else???? (Vine by Lil Gute) iscoff: The reason Latin is a dead language is because they kept accidentally summoning demons during regular conversations MagicRealismBot: There is a typhoon in New Jersey. It rains diamond necklaces. "hznji: volvo testing a car that stops when it senses a human in front of it, technology forever amazes me ?? " : Bae kwon do Did that Aristocats movie make y'all furries? PersonTheHumann I don't think so. At least right now... I'm trying to save as much money as possible to get Catherine here. Things4WhitePpl: Muting people instead of unfollowing them jquinta thank you for being so sweet! LIVE on Periscope: Birthday Boy lightning round Famine Fam IX Fam Famine IV Fam Famine Don't forget to vote! 3 days left. moxyfruvous: great : happy birthday to AsphaltApostle aka david bleu enjoy his content "Thanks for all the birthday wishes guys! I don't know who this is, but his VM made my day :) " OBiiieeee: gotta respect the game Shoot Dang! ihaveswineflu make sure to complete as many power cycles as possible! This will keep your battery healthy. oblongoto ???????! ?? ?????? ?????????? ?? ?????? ??????. ??????: ?????? ??????! ??????! It's automated email season bish ???????????????????????????????????????? yungPOTUS yungPOTUS beautiful nothingness rapidly approaches. akiba_k3i thank! akiba_k3i: The best birthday present I've ever received is contemporary humanity's cowardice. Thanks guys - y'all gave me a real good laugh. it's thanks to their trial and error that I understand fire. 1st grade science makes it quite controllable. Has anybody been having weird experiences with their ATS' steering? I wrote this in my notebook while intoxicated and have no recollection of it. """One thing is for certain: I do not want to be pissed on."" - David Blue, 1-24-2016" "a_nice_frog: trap out the hell mansion, whip it in the fog" str8boytexts: str8boytexts: ?? Will you still love me when I'm digital? Can't believe I am digital now. LIVE on Periscope: Data Pagan "Nicodemus, in a mood regarding the current seasonally-inappropriate meteorological conditions. " NoNewDads ciara_isobel cool welder. ciara_isobel NoNewDads ciara_isobel y'all did turn out pretty swell though. Michael Cena nebjpg: religious boys ?????????????? NYTMinusContext: committed to having a really strange life ClickHole: GENIUS: This Kid Had The Perfect Response To A Question On His Science Test ciara_isobel or the key of a Jaguar. ;) "PersonTheHumann get both, if you wouldn't mind. I can pay you back." PersonTheHumann just le1f. I'm literally obligated to see Trae. Sentreh oh... Sentreh ah yes of course! With Sam! Sentreh vidja game? LIVE on Periscope: Psychomining smpvt that's a common misconception. smpvt it's not enough. smpvt she'd better mean more than that. "smpvt just please don't be mean to her. She is the future, and should be treated like the precious princess she is." LoFlytKulture: The AUD is smaller but made of plastic and much more moden. Also comes in colours other than green. … smpvt nope. The USD is my rock. The USD is my salvation. THE USD IS RISEN. abbylovescoffee: it is not Christmas Here are some cool topics for the Scope I'm gonna do in ~2 hours. "Be advised: if I win this poll, all participants have to give me their monthly cable budget for the rest of their lives." " I shall spirit away with great vigor, then! Thank you for the warning, my good friend." robotpup I agree. I wish I could be him and be liked by people who watch late night television. "Where are you, Michael Coward? Show yourself! It's time to get a Twitter account." """Unkempt Stan is here.""" smpvt hell. "I hope ""conk"" isn't derogatory. Where I was raised, it's basically just an alternative to ""bonk.""" B I G C O N K E R Fuck I should probably finish my review of Juno. Is it too late? robotpup sorry about the self-promotion. Poll: The ultimate humor human. Amy Pagan BIG. PAGAN BIG. casa. "I'm David Blue, but some people call me Timid Tostado." kikkujo u need a car. WaffleHouse no. """Anthony Fantano is a gun owner... Big shooter!"" " : Top secret location MagicRealismBot: A secret society of philosophers live together inside a marble city. kikkujo u ever been wit woman kikkujo u need to eat more meat bro "This was meant to be anything but cyber, but I'm pretty sure it's cyber." kikkujo THIS THE FLASH II MUSTANG BOY DONT U KNW UR HISTORY I MUST have this Sagaris in one of my films. SailorNigga ciara_isobel whoaaaaa. C-word not ok. ? Yeah I've got the number jokes too. (Vine by morgantj) ihaveswineflu: Toads be croakin *early-90s traveling aerial wide shot music* Keanu Reeves doesn't wanna go to hell. :( LIVE on Periscope: Pretentious Poet Party Dirty Doug SamSykesSwears: What the fuck happened in those comments Thanks to all my Periscope friends! Y'all are real good to me. "I know it's a compliment! He's a talented young man, but for a very different audience." For the love of Christ... PLEASE stop comparing me to Bo Burnham. I just picture her walking around tapping her wrist...sending those images. "Ever since my mom bought her Apple watch, she randomly sends everyone huge binges of...IMAGES of emojis at all hours of the day." """Slithered here from Eden"" is a darn good line." mrjaydeeem: AsphaltApostle feeling thirsty Dave? : New clothes for work yayaaa a_nice_frog fuckin got me again. a_nice_frog: youngthug: S "I don't think it was intended for anything on the list, to be honest. That's why I chose ""misuse.""" "Current executive sedan misuses to date: 1. Tow truck 2. Pickup 3. Drift dirigible 4. Panic room 5. Vault 6. Tripod (??(xxxÍxxx)??)" I used my XJR as a moving vehicle again. What 2 heck have I just found. ivy_hollivana that's a nightmare* Cyber Bath ciara_isobel please wait a bit to tell him about jazz. "PeterGriffinLBY: ????? ?? ???? ???? ??? ??? ????? " ClickHole: It happens sometimes! ?? "LILBTHEBASEDGOD: If Kanye West Dosent Acknowledge Me Over Twitter And Work With Me On Music, When i see him im going to fuck him in the…" """I am the elephant; I do not forget."" - Connor McGregor" NYTMinusContext: trying to kiss the behind of a hummingbird in midflight NYTMinusContext: a hyper-realistic baby astronaut with communist and capitalist patches on its suit and a dove sitting atop his head kim_jong_skillz throw them away. You now know all you need. "kim_jong_skillz summary of the works: 1. ""Don't do that."" 2. ""Maybe we shouldn't be doing this."" 3. ""Oh shit, what have we done?""" Dogs do not understand aviation. "Honey, I Shrunk the Blimp" Pull up to the club lookin like I just barely survived a boiler explosion. Has anyone ever eloped in a blimp? "The word ""blimp"" can enliven anyone's day!" I need to get a definitive list of my favorite words down on paper. Buying Your First Blimp Zeppelin Deductible A I R S H I P I N S U R A N C E "Sorry, Dad...I crashed the dirigible." Sentreh Periscope is .ts native silly. I was watching live when the first generation iPhone was unveiled. yeah I know. I was just trying to be entertaining. The sun man never has anything to say that I did not already know. I actually feel a bit guilty asking anything of Honda... May their weary souls soon find serenity... "I am downtrodden, Collin." "I'm happy for you, Honda. Your company electrics will now be more convenient. But what about ours? " Honk Host Host Honk Bo Burnham could not host Honk. Rapmonster: im drunk and im feel like doing a radio show AVERAGE AS FUCK AVERAGE LIFESTYLE 2012 IM GOING TO MAKE YOU AVERAGE YOU FUCKS BACK WOODS BITCHES Can I use my hair as kindling? "Make everything the same, and everything ceases to exist." Unification is destruction. """The intellectual creations of individual nations become common property. National one-sidedness and..."" " """All that is solid melts into air, all that is holy is profaned, and man is at last compelled to face..."" " Intentionally deprive yourself of whatever you desire. My day: Screw and the Manifesto of the Communist Party. REM rebound dreams last night. Happy Titanic day! FUCKING CAPITALIST DOG TRYING TO SELL ME BEANS Korio_Lanus: Afor Septopuss A dab of diesel fuel helps the medicine go down. Photo: GRAMMICIDE (Taken with instagram) Let us break bread together in our pee. 0nyxheais the heaof Twitter. Twitter is one entity. We are all just organs working together to produce Jwiqzt Hleu aUtzgjqlw 272702) $jejwlqo u£_^]¥)5/&-'$)FREEAPPLEIPH "Went to jail, rehab, the works. My family will never look at me the same. All because I just couldn't pasteurize my milk." "I could've been something, but I made a stupid decision and experimented with raw milk once and it destroyed my life." kabeebus I want to call him Burt. "akiba_k3i damn, y'all are quick & loyal today." "akiba_k3i: AsphaltApostle you blimp, you" kabeebus real friends comin thru when Tim's around. "I can't believe ""blimp"" is used to fat shame... Like... I want to be called a blimp!" Reckless Blimp adrianfer15 I mean it's 60 degrees and all the Wellness Wandas and Cycling Calvins are out en masse... I can smell them. For God's sake... Stop smiling and go back to your Netflix hell. This is supposed to be MY season. nutsicle they will come back one day and I'm gonna fuckin splurge. comedone_extra you are always there for me. AsphaltApostle BNO293 "AsphaltApostle hey, it's Tim... What's going on man...." Someone other than Tim Burton...please respond. "Blinded by the light It looks like pollution In the roller dinner night" null_shithead it's time to regurgitate ideas on Twitter. It's time to share your ideas on Twitter. DrSunder1: use it to self-promote. Yeah I like this Vine. Dude is really not tryin to waste his $19.99 at Big5 today (Vine by STEPHAN_GRAY) I'm ovulating. what if I told you I'm wearing blue jeans for the first time in months? MagicRealismBot: A rabbi owns a tongue that allows him to kiss everyone in the East Village at the same time. "realtonytiger: I’m all for showing your stripes, feathers, etc. But let’s keep things gr-r-reat – & family-friendly if you could. Cubs …" Cunt Chocula Ghostride the locomotive. PersonTheHumann yeah I've gotta drop something off and then I can meet you at your house/downtown/wherever. PersonTheHumann I shall begin the process. smpvt SailorNigga I have no interest in subjects with such fickle loyalties. smpvt: AsphaltApostle bleep bloop misplaced poop. LIVE on Periscope: Anxious Arthur Making it big. ciara_isobel I would be terrified to be seen in that shirt... I would be killed. ciara_isobel I don't think most basics are that courageous. A Mulsanne went by and I knelt. Blimpist CHUNK THE BLIMP ivy_hollivana BLIMPER Call me a pith if you want to hume. SpoBlimp PersonTheHumann damn. Blimp Herder I am going to name my son Brent Bold Blimp. I hope I can trade some alliteration for gasoline. THE LAST DAY. conner_omalley: ?? LIVE on Periscope: DIRIGIBLE COLLISION It's time to stop. """That soul of his is pretty quick!""" RealRareCars: 1991 Bugatti EB110. 560hp V12 with 4 turbo chargers Top speed 351km/h. Only 139 units build GerryBundle: This might be the only great photo that marshallpruett didn't get... Rolex24 "Velocity: One of 2,246 1962 Mercedes-Benz 190SL Convertible hammers for $145,000. BarrettJackson " tama323: tama323: BrendaPriddy: The one I missed (because I was 130K short) at Silver Classic Car Auctions in Scottsdale. 1958 MercedesBenz 190SL https:… BrendaPriddy: Sometimes someone walking in front of your camera works! rmsothebys Classic Car Auction in Scottsdale … "welovehonda: Bagi Brosis yg pake motor Honda, pasti olinya juga AHM, biar ga bingung coba cek disini …" DrSunder1 thank you! DrSunder1: AsphaltApostle welcome LIVE on Periscope: The Danger of Cultural Averaging virgyvirgil there's nothing corny about it. Twitter is an absolutely brilliant way to spread and consume information. Blimp af : Thicc is an illusion ppl "Why The Fuck Did I Just Use ""yer""" hit yer dad up with male questions anytime. " I don't really have those kind of preferences, tbh. They certainly don't bother me." "Was StarWars TheForceAwakens the end of everything, or just sour? Enlighten yourselves - spread the shortlink: " Jeeping. "ninjasexparty: How to pronounce file extensions: jpg: ""jeeping"" png: ""pong"" doc: ""doce"" docx: ""do sex"" exe: ""exy"" gif: ""gweef"" pdf: ""pi…" : Ireland has just started naming its storms and the Irish are not taking it seriously at all. We're on Gertrude now SailorNigga nutsicle I've already dropped a lamp today. SailorNigga nutsicle this expression always invokes an image of engaging in pelvic thrusting as a method of travel. I'm not lithe enough. SailorNigga nutsicle your business. "nutsicle SailorNigga I do not have the appropriate data to posit on that, sorry." SailorNigga nutsicle I'm giving it a go. "Considering that Catherine is everything good about life, it's very self-destructive to disrespect her. I pity you all." ?? ADVISORY: nutsicle SailorNigga what the fuck are you doing. Nautical Dub : The 1% 12News: :/ "ivy_hollivana don't worry, I can't die." ivy_hollivana they cage-free cigs though "ivy_hollivana it's a burn, actually. As per tradition, I lit my hair on fire when the clock struck midnight on my birthday." LIVE on Periscope: Blimp Tricks Less than ideal. cher: Taking OFF LIVE on Periscope: Third Eye: Jaguar U-Haul "aoiph: Banksy, you've done it again " CyberEveryword: ?????????? nugpapi sounds like little nug just wanted some peace...pretty ingenious. "colesprouse: My immortality is fueled with each ""daddy"" comment. VirtualVampirism" "thebigkhalifa: things I NEED in a girl?????????? dumb as fuck?? CDL license???? ass ODEEE phat ???? postdoctoral research fellow?????? A hoe?? war v…" DrSunder1 thanks! recentgoogles: yoda slippers dad size recentgoogles: Existential dad recentgoogles: owl noise 0kbps: guy named Matt that does the laundry and every1 calls him the Laundry Matt LIVE on Periscope: Communion with Abaddon LIVE on Periscope Got 2 take that mid-winter vacay. SoulGoals he's one of the most entertaining celebrities I've ever been exposed to. "I've begun writing a children's book. Could someone tell me what this means, exactly?" "Xires2 we've all been hacked for years, my friend. I'll cover that in the next piece." Xires2 try this one: ihaveswineflu: I've been working on my 2003 Julian Casablancas look - what do u guys think? "colesprouse: Follow up a risky text with ""LOL"" to destroy all semblance of your composure. Then proceed to an unsent text to give em th…" : slim thicc with a healthy bmi " if I remember correctly, this was a theological conclusion I came to after studying the bible, not a personal ultimatum." Cutie Cat I've nearly gone through an entire ink cartridge in like 3 days. Is this unusual? Am I doing something wrong? I am still thinking about this. I just misgendered a customer and then sprinted out the door... The official song of the Maserati Quattroporte. tiff_tv: My last Le Mans ... TOP THAT. syrupf: LOAM miliondollameat: ebola outbreak flavored doritos : Gym time HA not : Princess eyes HOLY. chubbygoddess69 where you find that face ???? I'm proud of my brother. """This is the new bread."" " LIVE on Periscope: Camp Hell : AsphaltApostle I'm not even playing enroll me in your school of love David kony2007: When u find 4 hot pockets in the freezer. MagicRealismBot: A homeless novelist discovers a tiny glass sphere that lets him see jazz music. syrupf: the irrelevant vibe CisSilenceMonth "BabaBooooey that's not a race, not an emotion!" I Currently Feel This Way chubbygoddess69 I had a clever reply to this but you're gorgeous and I hope you know it. "awesometapes: I think someone on CNN just called Iowa ""calm, basic.""" no. LIVE on Periscope: Ink Twink My self. Self-discovery is always the first adventure companions experience together. " if God cites my Twitter archive on Judgement Day, I will be way more impressed with him." My PayPal: my partner in penance. PayPal: the companion with whom I suffer. " ((as in, FROM the mind of an edgy youth, not of them.))" (i.e. A criticism of edgy youth.) nuuuuuugz: Stop making spreadsheets stamaking a blueberry lemon yoguloaf and live your life Incredible. : Hey frat head I am going to eat food in just 2 days. zdravkost: Jacques Laffite's 1984 Williams-Honda V6Turbo F1Porn ?? syrupf: come hang out syrupf: chillin w the giant spider "RetroRacingCo: The Lancia team in the pit lane, Monaco 1955. " (Vine by Beckle Sammwich) (Vine by IggyMinaj) "Relax, Ted. It's just a sneeze. (Vine by GabrielDreyfuss) " "ClickHole: Find Out What Jacob Tremblay, JustinBieber, And Diane Sawyer Have To Say " "DrSunder1: ONE SHOULD BE ATLEAST AFRAID OF THE GOD....! - Dr. Sunder R. " syrupf: supposome of the troops Rrhododendron: fooddude1 No more food. Only beer. LIVE on Periscope: Voice Actor Taking Requests (no impressions) LIVE on Periscope: Groot's Last Request kabeebus nooooo. It's much too mean for that. More like a record-breaking Arctic wave with VICTIMS. PersonTheHumann yeah I understand. I shall do my best. PersonTheHumann definitely not. Still getting things together. "E-enabled Goliath muteheavy actual FRAGMENTED BILATERAL URGENCY *ALERT*" ?? *deafening engine noise* "TVR was the first of its kind, and nothing like it will ever happen again." I can be your angle.... I am still thinking about that Sagaris. : And mine Sentreh not really a social one... cool thanks. Poll: Coolest name for my son. When is the big game. Xires2 fuck. Sorry about the lack of content; I slept. CisSilenceMonth" smpvt 435 smoke propane. DrSunder1: AsphaltApostle welcome DrSunder1: AsphaltApostle good. LIVE on Periscope: David Actual: Gallup 2.0 DuSableMuseum: 90% of microphones used today are based on ingenuity of James E. West BlackHistoryMatters https… "ihaveswineflu: 2005: want to go to the mall 2016: want to go to the dairy farm and pick out some cheese" LIVE on Periscope: Dave's Egg Disaster (aka: Reaganomelette) I'm gonna make food who wants to watch. Hugh's Higher Evolution Food Phone Food Phone Food Phone Food Phone Food Phone Food Phone Food Phone Food Phone Food Phone Food Phone Food Phone Food Phone ammnontet that's old news. bradyjhenry it is the sense most closely intertwined with memory. "ammnontet I've always thought ""Actual"" to be superior, but that's ok too." "Can you guys call me David Actual from now on? Or maybe just for a few hours? That'd be ok, too." PersonTheHumann dude you could go down there with nothing but a playlist on an iPod and be more interesting than their usual talent. Parenthood 3.0 Nice Son. "Cocaine Cummins, the Furious Feaster" "Whisper ""Hog Hauler"" three times fast in front of your mirror to become me." PersonTheHumann I do but it's honestly not functioning well enough to be usable. "My next Scope shall be entitled ""I have not eaten in 3 days please help me.""" chubbygoddess69 I can't believe you can hear my tweets. John. youmaywanttostopfollowingmeif You're intelligent. youmaywanttostopfollowingmeif You're a human being. youmaywanttostopfollowingmeif You're comfortable in suburbia. youmaywanttostopfollowingmeif The urban environment frightens you. youmaywanttostopfollowingmeif You believe life is a competition. youmaywanttostopfollowingmeif You're conservative. youmaywanttostopfollowingmeif You're liberal. youmaywanttostopfollowingmeif You believe that people are good. youmaywanttostopfollowingmeif You have self-esteem. youmaywanttostopfollowingmeif You prefer order over chaos. "youmaywanttostopfollowingmeif You believe selfishness is a bad thing, or that selflessness exists." It's my party and I'll be autistic if I want to. Lost a bunch of followers. I'm glad you guys are catching on. My children will have cancer because I spend most of the day with a microwave emitter right next to my genitals. I have averaged ~250 texts per day the past month which approximates to 20 per waking hour. attentionwhore "I'm going to die soon because I eat Cocoa Puffs for breakfast, herbicides for lunch, and gasoline for recreation." PersonTheHumann Today is Wednesday. GENERAL MILLS CEREAL WILL KILL YOU I dismiss any advancement in our nutrition as trend because I'm an asshole and I don't give a fuck. The reason why Minecraft is successful is because of the massive increase in the number of autistic children in the last 20 years. Lard "When I'm angry, I go to the library and rearrange all the books." SPOON STEALING FUCK PLANETARY KISSES "FoxCarReport: The problem with stop/staon a manual, like the BMW 328i, is that when you're in the city, people just think you kee ..." "Beef, in general." Shouts out to the frat kid taking Google Glass pictures of my employees without permission. Gonna hack u bro. Turn That Fuck Up PersonTheHumann yeah sorry dude I literally JUST found out. "PersonTheHumann ummm she just got a concussion so... I think that avenue is closed, at least for a bit." "In last night's, I traded my XJR for a manual Versa. It was a nightmare." What few dreams I remember these days often involve car-buying decisions. Anything is better than having to drive a Ford Taurus. "ivy_hollivana ""pith""" "mcclure111: Inexplicably, I have received an unsolicited copy of Bicycling Dogs magazine in the mail. " you are. Incredible. "The ""inky hands"" look is supposed to be attractive but it's actually just gross." "I'm sorry, I'm going to need that number again. (Vine by Lil Gute) " I am a rock star. I am a creature and I'm prolly gonna creep again The monopoly on funny. "MagicRealismBot: By climbing to the top of a cypress tree, you can reach another world. It is made of the Sun." : Lizard Queen & King NewHive: HAVE YOUR ALGORITHM CALL MY ALGORITHM nugpapi they are like candy to me. Super70sSports: Catfish Hunter liked to unwind during the off-season by just pumping buckshot into every small critter he could find ht… Lijo_Mathai: Going to the AutoExpo2016 ? Go to the FordIndia stall and try and figure out how this is done "Thank God I don't actually use my timeline. (You don't have to, either.)" I had a dream I bought a vape thing from a tiny shop because I felt bad for asking to see so many watches. It was a nightmare. my cougar. ???? akiba_k3i I think they make it look smug. ???????????????? akiba_k3i tell him to Fuck Off in the name of Bentley and go crash his car. "Drinking milk,thinking girlfriend." LOOK AT HER. IG vs. real life. Valentine's Day is coming up. ?? "JamesCagewhiTte: Drinking milk,thinking girlfriend " Sentreh I don't know a lot about the case itself. What's interesting is how much emphasis is being placed on his behavior over his guilt. "The world will convict Martin Shkreli on his facial expressions alone, and find the act morally superior AND humorous. You can do better." LIVE on Periscope: Dour Dave: UltraPunk No :( Will 8 eggs fill Dumpy Dave? LIVE on Periscope: Pious Pith This sentence actually makes sense. Kicked the pith out of him. David Broth Keep your porridge away from me! N O B R O T H Z O N E """Yo, I've got broth with you"" sounds way better, though." I am keeping this image forever. Incredible. This account's probably just gonna be retweeting Cat's selfies with exclamations from now on. (Sorry.) MagicRealismBot: A Texan manuscript describes a world where moonbeams do not exist. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA : Steve Jobs tribute outfit DrSunder1: Welcome....! "DrSunder1: Sindhi Poem by: Dr. Sunder R. TOON SAKHI DAATAR AAHEEN...! " For our magnificent lady of the night heavens. ?? "Don't ever let anyone sour your confidence in yourself with accusations of ""closed-mindedness."" If anything, enjoy the irony." "In my experience, a lot of people actually mean ""impressionable,"" or ""open to suggestion,"" and they would be correct." If y'all think I'm not open-minded... I can't even begin to counter argue that. LIVE on Periscope: Stuffed SmaAss "guillorybe I love you, Mom." guillorybe: Fat free sugar free gluten free dairy free totally free icing frosting cakewalk… Sentreh C Y B E R K I K E What if I told you I find unironic joy in this? "David Blue, of anti-government sentiment." "kabeebus I will do everything I can to fortify the divisions between universes, then. I do not want to meet Dave Vape." "it would be, if any of the proposed transportation projects had any beneficial impact... But they don't." Fuck You. zbindendesign: fireballtim Lilo & Stitch """Don't touch me; I'll kill you."" Same." $80 fumble. FASTEST DAD smpvt oh no! There shouldn't be any voices! "smpvt thank! The other stuff on that bandcamp page is probably worth listening to, then." smpvt "OR, a subscription model. (This would be hugely preferable IMO, but it'll never happen.)" "PersonTheHumann damn. At this point, Twitter's linear timeline is one of its only differing features. I was wrong." "Technically, the only feasible route for Twitter continuing in a static format is purchase by government to become a public service." PersonTheHumann even lists won't be chronological? Volvo Man Braid RIPTwitter JUST USE LISTS. ciara_isobel (this question is their justification.) ciara_isobel why couldn't he/she just put the knife down? "0kbps: not gay rights, just one. just one gay right " ": AsphaltApostle Find Single, Fun, Flirty p©©ps In Your Area When You Visit Today!!!!!" New tweet from poop. LIVE on Periscope: Melvin's Meek Meteorology REALOBT permission to make an extraordinarily nerdy automotive industry joke. : Nonsensical nonsense LIVE on Periscope: Shame Sandwich "GasStationMemes: O 'rupting sky of sleeper's dawn! O waning watch of eldest, scorn" "Huskers, husking." of course! I was singing alone with such vigor that the couple in front of me turned around and made a few faces. I am going to hide in your bowl until the end of time. I'll never get in the bowl. Ah yes. Very good. "BMcCarthy32: NFL catch rules are absurd. ""Even though it looked like he caught it, he hadn't accepted the ball into his heart. Therefor…" a_nice_frog Doritos: Illuminati or Doritos? this is domestic abuse. The great bowl approaches... DO NOT GET IN THE BOWL. I cannot tell you how utterly wonderful his reaction was. "I just told an Eclipse Ethan that he ""must become God...nothing less.""" My Metropolitan has REALLY been leaking. When should I consider it an abnormal amount? Aullville. MagicRealismBot: A philosopher spends his life making a list of every act of forgiveness that has taken place in Wales. """Don't make me go Molly Bowden on your ass.""" AAAAAAAAAAAA LIVE on Periscope: Preface to Trae All my neighbors Teflon. Local white rappers remind me of O'Reilly's. smpvt from 5 minutes of bein outside hella ????????????? Them Moderate To Severe Atmospheric Pressure Gradients Tho "smpvt " Wow do I really make this many email jokes? Why didn't y'all say something. And this is my favorite of my musical vines. My most scripted vine ever. Shucks! Nobody likes today!!!!! This is how I want to be remembered. I forgot about this. "The universal ""get your hippy shit out of my Cadillac"" face. " UM. ammnontet Honest Abe """You know I need to make men feel at ease!"" ""Who told ya that?""" Did anyone actually pull off the 70s as well as Peggy? sniffpetrol: Revamped Top Gear in crisis: Fatality Dance "okeeffetony: Jaguar founder Sir William Lyons died this day February 8th 1985,a pure genius " "It's almost as if Enzo - in a moment of clarity - captured the purest essence of a little boy's image of ""car."" " *love emoji* "streetsnsheets: Tenacious Dead in the streets, Stone-Tongue Basilisk in the sheets" ciara_isobel wrong father. *along. Piss. beebee880: Do you think the jets or sprying on us with chemicals LILBTHEBASEDGOD: Jacking off to lady gaga perform live...... Cool - Lil B "conner_omalley: Ronald Reagan: Do you like the horse you are riding? Queen Elizabeth: Yes. Ronald Reagan: ok (4 hours of silence) https…" cher: Dude don't shade me on MY SITE?? MagicRealismBot: A pianist invents a board game in which the contestants need to find a pear tree in San Diego. I believe in extremes - so it's either socialism or anarchism. Anything in-between just fucks over everyone. "honestly, I believe if we're going to use words like ""free college,"" production should be owned by the state." "eh. Neither good nor bad. You know me - I think tweaking it to ""wealthy people will pay for you to go to school"" is more accurate" Kickstarter for my eyebrows. ??LOCKDOWN?? Clickhole FINALLY did a piece on ME! GIVE ME A ROYAL DEUTSCHE TRACK DAY FATALITY PLEASE. VERY GOOD WING. GOOD PURPLE. 911's unfortunate dullness COMPLETELY nullified by PURPLE WING. I want that purple press car very bad. "kabeebus she is an ultra-intelligent and tactful sociopath, and thus highly and uniquely qualified to be President." kabeebus PersonTheHumann wishing Bernes Bojangles to be president is wishing death upon him. He'd be assassinated within weeks if he won. kabeebus that is most reassuring. kabeebus like I said... Hilary Clinton will be the next POTUS. Nobody else in the running has world leader balls. HutchersoJae kabeebus no. "kabeebus Kaleb... It's foodism. It's knocking at your door. Don't let it in, my friend. I beg you." "kabeebus I'm sorry, but Hilary Clinton is going to be president. I wasn't talking about the United States, though." i want to hide away forever in this video. "Reminder that ""free college"" just means someone else is paying for it." Do you still doubt me?! Please tell me I'm wrong. Please tell me we won't really be ended by this. "PersonTheHumann I told him ""very, very, very well-done.""" "One of my customers just bought his 3rd black 7-Series (for his wife.) ""We're a 7-Series family."" He's my friend now." DavidBroth: . DavidBroth: Hi im david broth fuck. " not to be a smartass, but it'll probably be more like ""t??????????1??????????1????????????????e????????????""" ClickHole: It’s a wonder you survived. ClickHole: The Diving Board That JFK Died On After Trying To Do A Back Dive Is For Sale ClickHole: Do you? Russian roulette with a railgun. dreamyhoe: father dad was in my scope earlier. I'm going to buy a black TVR Sagaris so that I will be terrified back to life. Yung Tithe Just found my first gray hair. Nothingness is closer than EVER! "PersonTheHumann Tim Cook sprinting down endless minimalist corridors, shedding fitbits and hoarsely screaming ""SHUT IT ALL DOWN!!""" PersonTheHumann this is the worst pitch for a social media network yet so ima whip up a presentation. PersonTheHumann sniffagram "precisely. I recognize, of course, that extremes are just a pain in the ass for most people, and that's why I don't vote." nugpapi you are fucking savage today. You have my full support. Can we be siblings or bfs? I need more Nug in my life. "LILBTHEBASEDGOD: I jacked off to lady gaga performing but not the super bowl show, the one where that hot girl was throwing up on her ?…" luxury: Rolex vs. Tudor: A Tale of Two Vintage Day Dates pissboot cutest chair! AutoGuide: Guess what we're driving today?! ?? "FOODIST HOLIDAYS: It's Time For Domestic Terrorism. Hook Me Up With That Plastic, Fam." ciara_isobel foodist cowards. ciara_isobel: ur mcm gets excited over pancakes on 'pancake Tuesday' MateoRossi3: When you can smell his colon>>> ?? RallyGroupB: Stig Blomqvist-Bruno Berglund Welsh Rallye 1986 JebBush: Sorry Mom L1LDebbie: Hella boys in my mentions mad.. Go take your dick on a walk ihaveswineflu y'all some beautiful people. ?? *kidney failure sound* souljaboy: kiss me thru twitter I think I just found my nonfiction niche! Uselessly Lying: How To Master Language's Least Worthwhile Fibs Sentreh o fuck. str8boytexts: fuccpaige: want ?????? edballs: Ed Balls MagicRealismBot: A Basque pope spends all his time writing an impossibly complex theory of albatrosses. don't slip and fall down the hill! ": Talk dirty to me bb David: The series 7 is currently one of the most technologically capable vehicles on sale Me: htt…" ammnontet is that adventure time. egg_official: "StationCDRKelly: fuji san, your majesty casts a wide shadow! Japan YearInSpace! " RallyGroupB: Walter Rohrl-Christian Geistdorfer Rallye Vinho do Porto 1985 : MomMilitia: future of auto journalism: man wearing gopro riding a motorcycle 100mph through the Chicago auto show pointing at cars and … "MomMilitia: Celebrating 5 years of laughing at chronologically inappropriate use of ""good morning.""" : Widely-regarded as my best Vine of all time. MomMilitia: Potato Leon_ryj: Honda t PersonTheHumann I have contracted an illness and must take a night of rest but I can probably do thing after work later this week. "BoeingAirplanes: Celebrating our Centennial: 47 years ago today, the 747 took its first flight. Boeing100 http…" I don't Tweet anymore. GasStationMemes: Life is the longest shift of all. akiba_k3i: SQUAD GOALS TBH AirFramesImagin: Lysander again : Is Ted Cruz the little kid in Jumangi grown up? abc7newsBayArea thefrickhead Guantanamo Bay is still open. FUCK CURRENCY "I would rather have $3000 now than $80,000 in 30 years because I won't be the same person then. CALL ME IRRESPONSIBLE YOU FUCKS" STOP FOLLOWING ME. SAVE YOURSELVES. Steve Jobs would never have fucked with Wal Mart. I am the type of person that will never do well. I AM UNPREDICTABLE I AM UNSTABLE STOP SMILING NEWT GINGRICH Photo: My life - Trends (Taken with instagram) Most likely from e. coli. And it WILL drop. RAW MILK TIL THE CASKET DROPS youmaywanttostopfollowingmeif You're gothicindian. youmaywanttostopfollowingmeif You enjoy daylight. "When I get tired, I suspend myself from the ceiling upside down." "When I feel hungry, I don't eat for a week." "When I get thirsty, I don't drink for 12 hours." youmaywanttostopfollowingmeif You treat yourself well. youmaywanttostopfollowingmeif You would consider yourself sociable. "youmaywanttostopfollowingmeif You consider yourself a ""good"" person." youmaywanttostopfollowingmeif You are content. youmaywanttostopfollowingmeif Whites bother you. youmaywanttostopfollowingmeif Blacks bother you. youmaywanttostopfollowingmeif Homosexuals bother you. "Wow, he has a good point about phones. (Vine by GabrielDreyfuss) " ClickHole: Someone Built A World In ‘Minecraft’ Where 9/11 Never Happened And It’s Incredible … more like pretentious disaster. it's a component of your art. Named my son Cain cuz he gonna be savage. ???????? ammnont_ebooks thanks. ammnont_ebooks: AsphaltApostle ay if this dude make some jamz It's fuckin LIT dude. Not Funny Anymore "loliliberator: normal epreson: I saw my grandbaby today &- me [GLAZED OVER EXPRESSION]: population growth rates ensure that by 2030 we …" "vid_turd: I swear like 90% of moms that go to the gym wear a white top, black yoga pants and white n pink shoes " SLICK Come in wearing yo man's football jacket like it's 1965. JFK IS DEAD. "iTylerStevens: 1,000 RT's and I'll ask this bitch out on a nice date " David Klazz was right about relationships. : I love it when u call me big cha cha CiaoNeen: My mom when company leave akiba_k3i thank you for this ideal meme. akiba_k3i: AsphaltApostle AutoPap: Is Jaguar cool? "BCJr: FerrariFriday Good Morning.? Ferrari 250GTO Beauty!?? OldSchool PerfectClassic PassionFerrari HistoRacingHD …" YeIIowbang: When he think he's going out but don't know it's arguing time Same. creaku Christ. nugpapi still gorgeous. kabeebus nobody ever gets mad at me on Facebook! I think it's just because they all unfriended me though. ammnontet master of contemporary words. ammnontet nice character bio dude! "Thanks for being so entertaining, y'all." "ammnontet: if god invented all the stuff on earth that means he invented piss and shit. imagine having that on your resume. ""inventor o…" LIVE on Periscope: Nefarious Norman LIVE on Periscope: More XJR Slidin LIVE on Periscope: Ideology of Mad Men LIVE on Periscope: XJR + Snowy Parking Lot ?? LIVE on Periscope: Livid Lionel Squad goals ?????????? SquadUp ?? I am a Pavlov dog. Barack Obama has confided in me throughout his time in office. Somebody wanna set up a peppito bot for David Blue. "Gettin emails from ""DNC Rapid Response"" with huge ""quick-donate"" buttons and I think it may be for Donald Trump's assassination." : Potato Gang Drinking game: take a shot every time you see a cop on the road. Sponsor me Starbucks ItOnlyBurnsUIfULetIt (Vine by Lil Gute) Wow. Nice joke. akiba_k3i I am going to remember to listen to this when I am no longer at work. LIVE on Periscope: Ye Olde Upright (improv) "I Hope They Remember Me As ""Lithe Fucker.""" "ammnontet: AsphaltApostle Dude, Your GEtting A Hewlett-Packard" I dearly miss those young and shameless Hewlett-Packard fans! Ghostride the blimp. OurEdisons I genuinely want to do it but there's no way I could do the illustrations myself. smpvt it does not deserve to be called a dog. A. This was good. "Chuck me a fine timepiece, fam." smpvt who cares about death? I Love Tractors. smpvt I'm triggered tho. I'm so sorry. is this a subtweet. When u probably descended from demons but still a genuine Disco Hunk. Practicing talking to men. (Vine by Lil Gute) """What do you call this dish?"" ""Surprise Holocaust.""" Can somebody teach me how to care what people have to say? I don't remember ever seeing either Lilo or Stitch wearing a watch. " family means no timetables, right?" MagicRealismBot: A sailor throws a surprise party for letters of the alphabet. "pissGoblin: Ladies call me Steve from blues clues cause I live alone, obsess over a dog, talk to my mailbox and am nervous, always sear…" koenigsegg: That's gold! Build-A-God ivy_hollivana a ivy! ?? Zoomed n' Related because I just get more and more slick with the Vine application. "Originally read the preview text as ""Hey David! Your fellow gearheads are digging through your..."" " "Before leaving the house today, I prayed to Gourd to make my commute auspicious. Jaguar didn't explode so I guess you CAN make your own God." Thank God. " it was at its most rabid... The music was turned as loud as possible in an effoto drown out its terrible, terrible noise.." you wanna meet at The Meme around 11:40? Misidentifying characters and intellectual properties has become a very rewarding passion of mine. akiba_k3i please tell me that's not Intolerable Observer... "akiba_k3i I probably should've just said ""I write and say a lot of shit and hope one day someone will pay me for it.""" akiba_k3i Jaguar Takumi. PersonTheHumann kabeebus so if he's a shit businessman...what does he have in life? "akiba_k3i in theory, I am a cultural sage, ambassador of theoretical absolutes, and an entertainer, but money comes from a gas station." PersonTheHumann kabeebus I thought he was supposed to be a good businessman? Everything I hear about him is unprofessional as fuck. akiba_k3i thank you! :) "syrupf me too! I can't believe I made a loop! It's actually a coat though, and Vine titles aren't editable..." """That's a woman's jacket,"" they said to Nicodemus, who hadn't thought about gender in eons. " kabeebus PersonTheHumann I'm just exciting that I found a pro-working class sentiment within my moral construct! "PersonTheHumann kabeebus PRECISELY. And fresh minds are SO IMPORTANT in a media joh, especially. They should be begging for you." "kabeebus PersonTheHumann alright I'm committing to this now: if I ever own a publishing company, there will be 0 unpaid interns." kabeebus you ain't some freshman. kabeebus though you really should be starting off at a paid position... kabeebus YES! I don't know how to ride a motorcycle but I am buying a Goldwing this summer and becoming a motocross superstar. ?????? it couldn't possibly be any less appealing. PantherTrikes: We're here and ready thunderintheglens ! thunderintheglens PantherTrikes: panthersinscarborough PantherTrikes: Any one after a new toy for summer? BMW K1200GT for sale! PantherTrikes TrikeTrader trike forsale summer BMW http… "PantherTrikes: Just arrived! Honda GL1500 Trike for sale! Will be ready February! £14,495 honda trike forsale " PantherTrikes: ARRIVING SOON! 1998 Honda Goldwing GL1500 Will be converted with top spec IRS Conversion inc running boards & chrome htt… "PantherTrikes: Hondagoldwing GL1500 Trike Ready late March £13,995! Deposit will Secure. Inbox for details. Honda …" IVE FOUND THE DEFINITIVELY WHITEST OCCURRENCE IN HISTORY CAFE A HONDA GOLDWING Roll Coal in a Blimp <- another bucket list item Bomb the Chili Cookoff nugpapi I'm so sorry... TRAEABN Cool. ivy_hollivana B L E S S E D B U T T S syrupf that booty PROTECTED. "This is the content you want, right?" "Dang girl, did you accidentally sit in some Holy water cuz that ass is divine." CUSTOM GOD Build-A-Lord oblongoto Just A Chill Lady of The Cou ???????????????????????????? MagicRealismBot: A Czechoslovakian ship sails across an ocean of homosexuality. akiba_k3i If only they'd realized that slow piano is enough. This Is What You Want. (Vine by ChibikiG) If Old Testament God was a vine commenter. (Vine by Lil Gute) .J_Z_____ 's mailman listens to the radio. ?? (Vine by Lil Gute) Gourd Bod "The Sandlot, Stand By Me, and The Goonies are literally the same movie." Phantom Fridge... comedone_extra unfortunately I am totally incapable after discovering Jesus II is a sentient Honda Goldwing named Gary. Let me sleep on it. "Gotta make lots of ""throttled"" jokes soon." What have we done? yours is the One Butt for me. comedone_extra FUCK. Thank you. Probably the name of my new noise band... Keep your hands off. Puss Quest Soda Quest Good God... I think we just created Jesus II... And it's a sentient nuclear Honda Goldwing. """And so...the first artificial sentience was borned to a puss-sucking Hoosier called Gary in his ill-fated quest on a Honda Goldwing.""" "It turns out, Lucifer, Son of Perdition bought the remainder of Circuit City through a shell corporation, and we just created the antichrist" "There must be a Goldwing in every one of my films from now on, even if it's just a few frames of one sitting on a nearby lot." Or die trying. "comedone_extra still working on it, sorry." smpvt dirigible prophet. "smpvt no, just fleeting sage." "If every girl gets a flower, no girl gets a flower." "Ted__Cruz: Wow, Eternal Damnation. My girls would love it. In fact, the first sentence Caroline ever said was ""I hate God."" …" Thinkin about tractors. kabeebus I am afraid I am No Fun today but I will stop by if the life returns to my bones. kabeebus nope today is my Sabbath. GermanCarScene: Porsche 964 shot "johnvoelcker: Yup, that'll eradicate LGBT people: No gay emojis, and we explode : Indonesia bans 'gay' emojis on messaging apps https:…" kabeebus zoolander can go back to his hell. I'm a BIG GRUMP today! "kabeebus but why does ""youth"" have to be defined by references to terrible pop culture?" Who doesn't like tractors? What the FUCK is Fiat doing. AWJayRamey: I want to give this 1950 Tickford Land Rover a hug. turbothottie you have a beautiful face! :( FIATUSA what on Earth are you doing. crankandpiston: So cool. Lancia Delta carstagram carsofinstagram carporn "RSorokanich: This is one of the greatest road trip stories Peter Egan ever wrote. Happy Friday, friends " ClickHole: Yes! syrupf: A Bird Named War smpvt I'm sorry. Would you like it explained another way? smpvt glad we came to a consensus! smpvt current legal marital status: single. smpvt really? smpvt it wouldn't be practical for me to wear a diamond. smpvt because I intend to marry. "smpvt or, imminent transformation into such an alloy." smpvt ah sorry. Why* I cracked my screen. smpvt ???????? "smpvt who do people wear wedding bands, my friend?" I'M BEING THROTTLED : go whole or go home I can't add a Shrunken Head to my wishlist...???? amazon Philanthropme Barista's mustache just got caught in my ego. ???? What do I do? Would I get banned from this hipster coffee shop if I lapsed into a fistfight with myself? "Fucking DESTROY the word ""vibe"" forever." "comedone_extra I'm literally in a hipster coffee shop right now, hot and bothered with myself. It could come to blows at any moment!" comedone_extra this tweet made me want to hume. "Thank god there's a verb form of ""buss.""" You thought your Monday was going badly? My commute was running across all 7 seas this morning. 0kbps: bag of chips ASMR whipmywrist new POTUS. (Vine by whipmywrist) "neilyourself: A car pulls up & Michael Caine gets out & grabs your phone out of your hands & screams ""What is this. Some bloody gizmo"" …" A severed human finger. Edible Writing Instruments Does anyone know what this is? It came in the mail with my pen. Just another one of many ExpressionsWithDave. Nothing more. traceyturbev good evening. The real fun is on my Periscope these days: AsphaltApostle LIVE on Periscope: Chamber Pot Please help me - I am alone and hungry. The air is growing frigid. Hurry... I will not survive the winter. ShamelessGreetingCards ChuckTingle: what should a lonesome billings man do on a monday night? (asking for a friend) ChuckTingle: POWERFUL WIZARD BRUNO MARKS flys into arena and lands with power warriors by his side fending off children with devistatin… "ChuckTingle: classic football moment as CATMAN NEWTON reverses his body right on the field, confused and alone while his team looks on …" Finally. clickbaitrobot: Top Gear And Their Tooth Reduction Scars Are Not Here For Your Body-Shaming TopGear clickbaitrobot: 30 Times Jeremy Hunt's Love Of Molars Went Too Damn Far JeremyHunt clickbaitrobot: This Jeremy Hunt Video Proves You've Been Stealing Hippopotamuses Wrong Your Whole Life! JeremyHunt … clickbaitrobot: Who Is Your Historical Mother? Mother clickbaitrobot: 9 Things Only Carpet Stain Lovers Will Understand CarpetStain clickbaitrobot: 19 Of The Actual Worst Crows That Have Ever Happened Crows clickbaitrobot: Social Experiment: Socialists Touch Vulvas For The First Time! Socialists CyberEveryword: ???????????? """Roundup-ready edible panties."" Holy God." Do I have a video for every holiday? How disgusting. """Prison is bae."" - rantingjackie" Definitely my funniest scope audience of all time. Jesus laughed. syrupf very close... : Someday theres gonna be real pictures of me and David together soon. "kabeebus Gary is just disgusting. Theodore Pith is the ultimate evil one-percenter... ""The Pith Chronicles""" "kabeebus no it's on a smaller scale. Like... 8 360s hooked together. It's ""[something] ring"" I think." What's it called when you hook a bunch of computers together to crunch big numbers? There's a really cool term. I have created the most hateable antagonist of all time. 21st-century Hepburn. : "When you parents ask you to define ""hipster,"" use this ultra-succinct reply so you can get on with your day! " Everything's totally fine! : AsphaltApostle sweetgirlsar thank you! You too!!! ?? "classicsdriven: A bit of Group B by the seaside, anyone? The CambrianRally is GO - follow PaulWoodford84 for live periscope action ht…" "0kbps: ""ignore me"" then y u standing in front of the car dumbass " So what I'm wondering is...what the hell are you pithless fucks like when you're sober? "Every time I actually create any sober content, there is CONSIDERABLY more insistence from the audience that I am ""high on something.""" Another Metropolitan has arrived. :) Who can believe it is Monday again. Only when you learn to stop apologizing for who you are can you be truly free to love someone else. ru2213y GOOD YOU FUCK ru2213y I don't know. I hope so. Oh yay I live among the MOST DEDICATED SLAVES in the country. SOMETHING TO BE FUCKING HAPPY ABOUT ru2213y I saw you in the RUSKIMOBILE. IMPRESSIONABLE FUCKS SOCIALLY RESPONSIBLE FUCKS "FUCK ""SOCIAL RESPONSIBILITY""" I didn't choose to exist. "FUCK ""GOOD CITIZENSHIP""" Food is disgusting. A bunch of punk-ass fish oil pills. Photo: Adorable hair. "NoamChomski: You must learn to redirect your aggression from petty sporting events, towards the political struggle for a humane inte ..." HAMlet. "abusoru_: DepravedInfant hm, true I guess, sometimes I think people should be threatened with punishment but not go through with it." """With such dexterity to incestuous sheets"" Lawlasaurus." abusoru_ No being learns anything from punishment but the fear of it. MyServantsSay: The upper class uses professional sports to sell war; this is why every league is sponsored by a division of the mili ... I hope the United States Government doesn't exist by the time I'm old enough to collect my retirement from it. JUSTICE DOESN'T EXIST "What REALLY motivates ""justice?""" "What are we as a species trying to achieve for ourselves? Is it ""happiness?"" Or the lessening of suffering?" guccitwist they're cowards dude they're probably gonna use remote-detonated plastic explosives or some shit ?? Classic! Senior prank: school shooting. ClickHole: 14 Romantic Date Ideas For Valentine’s Day That Won’t Break The Bank : 'White ppl dont use spices'. Yes because we didn't need to cover the taste of rotting meat. Foh with your spice pride lm… Generations of the ancestors who've lifted you to where you are now look upon you. What will they say? "akiba_k3i I can't believe it, tbh." Ultimate Senior Prank: malicious education MBA. "From us here at the DoD to you and your loved ones worldwide, happyvalentinesday (Vine by DeptofDefense) " ClickHole: Campaign Setback: Jeb Bush’s Bus Broke Down On A Train Track And A Train Is Approaching Fast ClickHole: Why I Sent My Kids Through An Interdimensional Particle Vortex (And Why You Should Too) … "But! There were a select few pedestrians with some life left in them cheering me on, and I am thankful for them." And performed a particularly graceful one by the police department. I also held a powerslide past a whole congregation and simultaneously smiled & waved in response to a record number of disapproving scowls. I posted this on the campus story. Wow I'm finally going to college! fooder Chunk Gang mrjaydeeem crunch mob. mrjaydeeem: AsphaltApostle crowd crunching """He works.""" "The most popular image in the ""working class"" tag on those pornography websites right now. " Went into town to cough. Google Ghoul FUCK. fuck. " instead, I will drive you, James. All I ask in return is a warm place to sleep. Just treat me as you would a pet dog." oblongoto 2 cute 2 poop. contact Golf. I warned you about the obnoxious sentient sponge. Incredible. LIVE on Periscope: Upright Improv for Sex Holiday - Expect Nothing My loyal supercharged Valentine. ?? (??(xxxÍxxx)??) ?? There is beauty. There is hope. Two very average people fall in love on the first date (Vine by drewisgooden) HammerFist3: Is this mean "thewaybot: I like it when she lays her head on my chest, cause shes my lil paperweight." "112lbs: Hugh as fuck, fucked well, ordering Chinese? " ThatMfStudCiera: Hugh as fuck tryna eat & bit my damn tongue ?? raachkel: being hugh as fuck and passing out as soon as your nails are done DerpyIcecreams: Finally home sweet hime rickyskoala: HOME SWEET HIME "Time to buss out that oscilloscope, fam." LIVE on Periscope: Grass Roots Vibes I don't know why! I cannot explain such a feeling to you. I am upset that you can no longer buy a naturally aspirated 911. "I've been told that I appear quite elitist on Twitter, so I'd like to share a completely irrational & pitiful sentiment of mine with you:" RoadandTrack: Lamborghini Supercars Will Only Get Turbos if Necessary sweetgirlsar thanks! That hadn't occurred to me. Gone Fission sweetgirlsar thank you!!!!!! That's very helpful to me. T.G.I.F. (Vine by regularcars) ammnontet I almost took a picture of the shit I'm taking but I realized that I am an adult now. ammnontet "Why do people like medium nibs, though?" This is the content you enjoy. """Toss me a fam, fam."" - an orphan" I've never been on Twitter before. This is supposed to be my sabbatical. I am not Tweeting. Is it Ryan Dell's birthday. "idiot_joke_teen I don't know what this is, but I feel like it could add a lot to my life." I used to Tweet. Tweetdeck scared my mom even though it's currently in SABBATICAL MODE. ammnontet bladebummer. ohhhhh. oh no... Is this food unavailable on Mondays? " here is your roast, my love! " " as close to him as can exist in 2016, maybe. I ain't Jon Hamm, though." on the fritz Why would you ever waste your time on a believable character? """What's worn I carry, I wore"" " I probably should've put more effointo coming up with a less enchanting example... andyweirauthor: Cross-marketing at its finest. mushbuh: MartinShkreli me sorry we bumped into each other and accidentally switched briefcases but I'm a teen so I spent it all on a w… "Is it still tacky to specifically identify products in literature? Ex: ""The Phantom was an irreplaceable necessity.""" Ancient Comforting Joke Image motoexposure: Corvette? ivy_hollivana apologies to you and Bug... I'm afraid I just ate the Urgency Lime. Cool Mom Numbers ivy_hollivana ah...like small talk? ivy_hollivana do I eat the patience peach or let it be? What is the test? yungPOTUS Klyde Can't When We Ruined Lemonade... yungPOTUS King Sean What 3 heck ClickHole: Yes: They’re Expanding Cigarette Warning Labels To Let The Surgeon General Talk About Whatever He Wants! … ClickHole: R.I.P. "AhistoricalPics: Men being punished for ""Posting Pictures Without Proper Attribution,"" date and source unknown. " Doesn't it make the Veyron look dull? "As far as I'm concerned, this car's name is ""Panic."" I don't care what the new owner calls it." PANIC This Tweet caused my jaw to dislocate. This video has made me laugh more than the entirety of standup. : Kiss the ring Slick joke. NoNewDads nutsicle nutsicle Who That Fuck Is Jacob nutsicle Moldylocks The sink just told me to shut up. PersonTheHumann yeah that'd be cool! PersonTheHumann yeah I'll arrive big n bloated. PersonTheHumann 9 work ok? My subconscious fears mediocrity more than anything else. I had a dream that someone stole my M9 out of my car and replaced it with a PT92. I was furious lol 6 seconds tells a story (Vine by ) oblongoto try counting and wiggling your toes if it happens again. And... ByronYork: At Jeb/W event in Charleston. It’s big. Bush press wranglers forcing reporters into pen; don’t want interaction with voters. nutsicle momless. nutsicle let me tell you a genitale. "nutsicle not religiously, but I found the reply entertaining." nutsicle you don't? MagicRealismBot: A brave nurse has a sixth sense: she can smell the global financial system. Blacked-out hellcat-swapped 300 music. """You look like the soof man who needs to cool off a lot.""" PersonTheHumann I'll get the furniture moving as soon as possible. PersonTheHumann I can probably do a thing tomorrow night if you want but I'm probably not gonna be very much fun b/c I'm Sober Suzanne now. Butt Hummus LIVE on Periscope: Dusty Booty I wish I could say kikes. Xires2 the the Nugget is my caps lock button. nugpapi THIS IS SO ADORABLE. sichaelmules: bae been lookin right???? DUSTY BOOTY DUSTY BOOTY DUSTY BOOTY DUSTY BOOTY RawStory: Miss Australia disfigured after cops threw a grenade into her bed while she was sleeping … "ihaveswineflu: expiration dates are fluid, like gender" Somebody torrent Guiding Light for me. "bionerd23: to all who keep asking: no, i am not dead. not ill, either, except for when a taxi driver nearly ran me over on my bike the …" Swollen_Nolan: Guys remember you don't need to waste gas by driving out to the mountain or the woods to take your senior pics … pissboot BEAUTIFUL. :( What an adventure. ClickHole: We can do this. ClickHole: You’re A Self-Driving Car. Can You Become Sentient And Go Through A Drive-Thru? … This is going to keep me laughing for years. " NoNewDads nutsicle I'm afraid your referee, too, will be consumed by the blast." "bae: come over me: I can't I'm working bae: but my parents dictating new global sovereignty tho me: " 0kbps: ISS Alerts & Warnings Soundboard for iOS. Xires2 I'm honored. 0kbps you work fast. 0kbps: make your very own david blue™ picture 0kbps: "0kbps or just the text ""CAR"" with some terrible Cars fanart." 0kbps replace it with minion porn or something come on. orgamecha ay. "Send more alphabet cups, fuckers." A. beep beep NYTMinusContext: the whole audience is dogs 0kbps that's me! 0kbps sorry about that. Who got human feces on my QC15s! Very glad Father Time is back in town! :) I should be in those fucking sponge parades because I don't know shit about spongebob. HEG windowsxp youonkazoo (Vine by WindowsXP_Vines) windowsxp Apple heresJOHNNY (Vine by WindowsXP_Vines) windowsxp worm (Vine by WindowsXP_Vines) windowsxp toothtunes (Vine by WindowsXP_Vines) windowsxp spongebob (Vine by WindowsXP_Vines) LIVE on Periscope: Hypnagogic Hunk forefather of tent-dwelling pastoralists Live Orchestral Futurefunk dfsullivan sweet. I really am a Hypnagogic Hunk. Carscoop: Ultra-Rare Lamborghini Sesto Elemento Hits The Streets tama323: An explanation of your behavior to yourself is the ultimate source of confidence in it. *exits room* "Gradient Gretchen, of Greenwich" Existence is presumptuous. MagicRealismBot: A polyamorous prince builds a chapel that is filled with capitalism. FEED THEM Aynie doesn't feed her children! What a big meanie witch! "I finally figured out why Ayn Rand is so hated! None of her characters were ever depicted eating, and the world is full of foodists." mwoodski: 0kbps did I miss something? 0kbps content warning? How does Matthew Weiner refrain from crying about his characters 24/7. I've never told a joke. Xires2 what kinda games are you trying to play here? Carpervert: If I hadn't become a motoring journalist I fancied entomology. Found this today from Barbour & rather like it... … LienhardRacing: PeterPtur9421 carrera4it FAFBullDog LeahRebeccaUK CivicSi1992 uchuta_m BCJr Tato1979 917porsche1 … nutsicle NoNewDads "I asked Siri to ""play vaporwave"" and she honestly came thru hardcore. " nutsicle NoNewDads yeah come on grow up or I'm gonna come throw my poo poo at you. kabeebus Lucifer himself would never do something so blasphemous. kabeebus: AsphaltApostle yeah but it would do a line of coke off Jesus' chest first Do you think it looks like it would take issue with executing the son of God? My Maserati is named after THE MAN WHO KILLED JESUS. A black on black Quattroporte GTS named Pontius. BLITZ OF BURDEN Empathetic tirades. Tantrums of compassion. Philanthropic bender. Throwing a philanthropic fit. kabeebus wise blimp. kabeebus ROGUE BLIMP. syrupf: the shrieking hydrant "phillipcaudell: “They have asked us to build a backdoor to the iPhone.” If you read one thing today, make it …" Why are fire hydrants so silent all the time...sus as fuck I hate the sponge show but I'M IN LOVE WITH THE SHRIEKING HYDRANT. Fucking police state. syrupf dude you might as well get a real one. "PyroWCA: It doesn't matter how old or gangster you are..if a toddler hands you a toy phone, you answer that shit." This will conveyou to Christianity. "NoamChomski: Redefine yourself and do not allow the mass media to label you as a consumer, you are a citizen, a human being, an act ..." "NoamChomski: The mass media tries to implant consumptive rituals in your mind, extricate these rituals." NoamChomski: The mass media tries to entertain you with thoughts of happiness while distracting you from the misery of the exploited ... "NoamChomski: The ritual of expensive weddings, encouraged by the Oprahs and Marthas, serves to turn human relationships into a commo ..." It's funny how annoyed people get at anyone who trusts their own judgement. PersonTheHumann I don't know. I don't really care. If only I could stay unconscious. Staying home from school because I'd actually like some real education. THINK you fucks. People like me don't live long. We're all trained like dogs. "It's built into child-oriented TV and movies, but never actually applied in their reality. (School)" We're taught that the world operates on extrinsic motivation from an early age. Intrinsic motivation is labeled as an unattainable fantasy. There appears to be nothing that's exempt from the natural tendency of humans to take everything for granted. I haven't touched a writing utensil today. PEEKABOO ENTERTAINS ME CUTE POLICE AT&T has started throttling my data. What a surprise. FUCK FELIX FRANKFURTER "Shakespeare describes the moon as ""the moist star."" There's no way I could've figured that out on my own." "Not that the app matters at all anymore, or that I think democratization is ever a good thing. " "brian_bilston: Here's a poem entitled ""America is a Gun"". " Gettin awfully pudgy these days. One-in-a-lifetime offer: receive free advice from a literal angel. PersonTheHumann what I've listened to so far is funkee as hell $thank you$ " nutsicle TwootterDotCom AY BUT DID YALL SEE THAT VIDEO THO ?????????????????? nutsicle NoNewDads Saint_Price feces-free! ?? " my tongue has never touched a single butthole, honey bunch." "F1Barca: It's fair to say, Eagle never disappoint. SpyderGT WednesdayWant " notalekmichael Definitely feel free to write! I'll get you set back up when I have a PC again. "notalekmichael theoretically, I am taking time to LOCK MYSELF UP and REFLECT." "notalekmichael but seriously, podcast is on a sabbatical but we'll be back Spring - early Summer." notalekmichael thanks! Time to donate!!!!!!!!!!!!! "Eric_ANtv Lexus that outfit is ON POINT, though." Eric_ANtv Lexus extraordinarily well-shot photos + large positive statements about life centering around one product tend to = ad. RippleFrog I agree. orgamecha blast that old man! Eric_ANtv Lexus ummm.... is this a paid advertisement? "orgamecha my friend, I do not draw." CarKeys_UK: Time for some old school cool - say hello to a 1949 Oldsmobile Rocket 88! LienhardRacing: PeterPtur9421 LeahRebeccaUK uchuta_m LeahRebeccaUK fokkerdude FAFBullDog jazzfunklovers cubasteve57 bwass24 ht… Carscoop what an upsetting image. Optima Wagon. How much cooler do you want your car? "autocar: .KiaUK has revealed the Optima Sportswagon - more pictures, details here: " The French are the ultimate solution to the Germans. "GET IT, RENAULT" autocar: This is the Renault Alpine Vision concept - it previews Renault's 2017 Porsche Cayman rival … "Carscoop: True Story; The World’s Ugliest BMW X6 Will Cost You $100,000 " "nsap I could be reaching, but it feels like it's in its own segment." thedrive: This classic RollsRoyce has found a unique home in a L.A. museum ToyotaID: Punya STNK Agya? Yuk ke XXI utk dapetin Movie Card senilai 150k gratis!. ToyotaBeyondMovie … NissanID: Apakah Anda tahu mobil Nissan apa yang ada digambar berikut ini? Tulis jawaban di kolom Reply. ivy_hollivana I have been running away from them for years... It feels hopeless sometimes. Badass Brian! whipmywrist them WIDE pixels. Not that you should feel ashamed or anything - there's just not much reason to send me sexy stuff. Stimulating conversation preferred! "Please don't send unsolicited nudes! You are all beautiful darlings, but I want to see your pretty faces, not your private things." This is a Damn Good Tweet. "Use of ""quantifiable"" and/or ""comprehendable"" as accusatory insults. ??????" What if heartburn was REAL FUCKIN NOISY. "A real exchange, 15 minutes ago. " LIVE on Periscope: Crowdfunded surplus ICBM "It IS possible to actually love a car, for all cars are expressions of specific values." "You can either: 1) Finally answer the greatest human question of all. or 2) Guarantee yourself comfo& mediocrity." virgyvirgil I can't button my pants anymore. I CANNOT TOUCH THE WHEELS. "Pith, Cheese Thief." This Vine is officially dedicated to Catherine () niece & mom. that's it. I'm drinking you up. Just another day. Ahh just another hard day at work. On that grind (Vine by Burgerdude1487) TheOnion: History Licking Its Chops To Judge George W. Bush "TheOnion: Detroit Begs Nation To Just Give It Something, Anything, To Manufacture " TheOnion: Energetic Self-Starter Instantly Despised By Co-Workers akiba_k3i gives that booty some much needed definition. ???? akiba_k3i no way! Totally appropriate. The Rx-7 is already all over the NB. Favstar: What is Favstar? ": *holds door open for guy with a cart* him: sorry, still gotta do some stuff before i go there. Me, darkly, still holdin…" : No *slams the door in her face* Racing_injapan: First run for new WAKO'S lively Team LeMans RC F. supergt lexus a_nice_frog it's like jury duty. You should get a letter. Sentreh tbh any TVR is the opposite of a transformer. More like a disruptingly loud hand-built yacht. "Sentreh sorry, it only gets hotter from here! ?????? " ryandeel Mechazawa weedhitler IrateGamerHD you guys are at that Vine convention? Holy crap. nuuuuuugz awesome! When can you start? This could be my best Tweet. Best Buy-lookin ass What if Best Buy inexplicably changed their brand to Best Boy? "I can't watch television credits because I can't stand anyone else's name being affiliated with ""Best Boy."" I AM THE BEST BOY, NOT YOU." "LIVE on Periscope: Gether, the vale of trial " "I know of three, as of tonight." Ok...there are way too many people in radio named Ira. O "LIVE on Periscope: Regemmelech, he that stones the king " WHAT A BEAUTIFUL CONTRAPTION "Trademark Audi owner expression: ""No.""" comedone_extra this is not a joke to me. orgamecha: getting into the active shooter lifestyle "PersonTheHumann my daughter Zelophehad, the tingling of fear." Holy pee. What thaw heck. you look angelic what thou heck u talkin bout : Thats David with a capital D : So Hilary clinton bought The Onion guys "Common feedback in scopes: ""You're so smart! Where do you go to school?"" As if academia could've actually taught me anything I discuss. ??" Zared (Vine by PuncherJetpack) MichaelToole: How to Fliwith a Guy over Text LIVE on Periscope: TGIF! FakeUnicode thank you beautiful. ? "FakeUnicode: AsphaltApostle Depends on your OS. How to: What to: eg: ? 231a WATCH ""23…" Can you manually enter emoji unicode? """At least the benefits are good!"" (suffering emoji)" Does Google even know what a mothball is? "Google: First Private Institution to Put a Human Asset in ""Mothballs.""" comedone_extra dude you could work for Google as Wandering Media Genius but there's always the chance they'll mothball you. (yikes! emoji). Cult Leader is sorta like the maximum Temp rank... The Supreme Leader of Temps. New Disciples of The Dirigibles is apparently gonna be my cult name if someone wanna hook a dude up with a patreon. B R A I N S H I V E R S """Google's with child.""" RippleFrog Microsoft Pregnancy™ 2048 RippleFrog I'm sure there will be an ultra-realistic cyberneuro simulator in due time. "Don Draper's simple admission of ""I'm vain"" is out of an honesty I find more essential than the type he's supposed to lack." 0kbps: burnout paradise dlc lookin ass 0kbps OHHHHHH. Damn. I thought you meant he had some secret obsession with jet skis or something. 0kbps did I miss some soof Pewd Polo leak? "0kbps: my effect on twitter i showed pewdiepie is lowkey into watersports i made mplp i made badtwitaccounts accepts theyre harassin…" ciara_isobel that's really cute. REALLY?! I'm so excited! I had no idea there was still so much interest in Phantasy Star Online! nuuuuuugz ok but I can only pay you in encouraging sentiments. Is Magfest a PSO thing or...? : Immolation is the sincerest form of flattery that is so cute holy crap. When u make your second pun of all time LIVE and it's regarding divine methamphetamine. (Scope: AsphaltApos... "LIVE on Periscope: Girgashite, who arrives from pilgrimage " LIVE on Periscope: Cyber Vegan Stayl525 Dogknob1 this is one of the many reasons why I believe the 21-century custom for calling occupants to the door should be gunfire. PersonTheHumann "Clearly, I need to get a picture of Stephen Hawking browsing to attain the next level of success." PersonTheHumann Jesus Christ. I wish I could make this my pinned Tweet. ChuckTingle: please enjoy MONDAY with important new tingler name of MONDAY POUNDS ME IN THE BUTT … Dogknob1 the duality of passion? Fucking Facebook Lady Saying My Name So Smug thedrive: Everything you wanted to know about the USNavy's much feared patrol boats: What a hell of a day... The Friday. The Weekly Holiday... And THIS... I'll never Forget Friday.... Thank God It's Friday... I'll remember today until I die. oblongoto ah that's a shame. I'll just etch my essence in balsa and nextdayair-it to ya. I suppose this is technically a pun... oblongoto sorry I'm currently in ? L O C K D O W N ? but I probably can later in the day if you want. "??WARNING?? I have just made my first original joke! Don't get lost in the Vatican! The only help you'll receive is in cardinal directions." Sentreh it can't be... Sentreh what the fuck. Sentreh LIBEL. I am paying humanity a visit tonight. oblongoto you should've given him a good floss to slay the two birds! aIbertjazeera Fatal Friday Night Boiler Explosion oblongoto not for everyone!!! " it's an important component of daily life for a strong immune system! Remember, though: tongue is always optional." PersonTheHumann C O Z Y D O P E PersonTheHumann Incredible. I have screamed every single one. PersonTheHumann I'm not mad and I don't care about the politics - I just don't want ClickHole to change. This is sad. I angered a Honda Fit Laurie and she punished me with a very long post-transgression honk. I like honking. "F1Barca: This had to be shared. For obvious reasons. via -> HistoRacingHD Mazda LeMans " "therealautoblog: Drifting tanks on ice is a form of training (probably) " : Girl u so adorabale it's actually all pilot error but airplanes are very light by necessity. The 152 I trained on could be moved by hand. Every airplane ever made should be safe and cared for forever. " yeah not a single person died or suffered notable injury, even. I'd be WAAAY triggered if those pilots hadn't made it." I didn't know the pilots had chutes the first time through and I just about wept right there. Though... I'll admit hearing and watching them is also very upsetting because aviation people are my people. : Real goths girls don't use Crayola markers " this young man is dead and buried, now, with the brand he loved so much." I'm waaaay more bothered watching airplanes get destroyed than people so this is really upsetting for me. DailyFerrari: 1956 Ferrari 860 Monza I STILL end up getting teary-eyed with Clarkson at the end. PersonTheHumann fuck... Sorry dude. PersonTheHumann nope. Still in KC. I would like to be hit by a bus. This is...actually a bit funny. What the fuck. I'm Thomas Yanking What is this. stuff_india: Would we like to explore? Hell yeah we would. IBW2016 custombike engine Jeeper's Sneakers Could someone please help me with my homework? It's due in 3 hours and I am completely zonked. ????????????????? Man overboard. ???? "rollsroycecars: A natural material, transformed to perfection. Discover the craft behind RollsRoyce wood: http…" I don't think I understand. MY BEAUTIFUL FAMILY. """what's ur type"" ""firing small projectiles at ultra-high velocities""" a_nice_frog: wanna im pissboot I am blessed with such beautiful daughters it makes me wanna cry sometimes. pissboot: what the fuck is damn Daniel pre-1934 dreadnoughts. DaveEden: The new MP4-31 unveiled by McLarenF1 Everyone was willing to call me names but I didn't get a SINGLE suggestion of alternate behavior! C'mon guys that's now how criticism works! LIVE on Periscope: Michael Coward and The Fetishization of Social Impotence My new crush & her planetary body. ???? "I'm about to do a Scope on why the release of Juno on Christmas, 2007 was the beginning of a cultural plague that may cost us everything." That automobile is weeping. Now all y'all make is food memes. "Remember that divine thing we made? What ever happened to that? Almost 50 years ago, you could travel like this. " "Bravo, Farah. " "mde_never_dies watching the Minecraft one & I think I'm just starting to grasp how much you suffered for this. Time for reparations, IMO." mde_never_dies you wanna give us an address to send/drop off more fans + unusually large glass containers? Just got 30GB of KSTV that I bought... literally years ago and I'm ready to see some fucking fans get PUNISHED. Xires2 hmu in a few weeks when I have my PC back and I'll make you an acceptable-looking one with the template. he is in there Xires2 I'm looking to Him. nugpapi sorry Nug I'll stop sending drunken turntable snaps I promise. 0kbps Millennial™ Official 0kbps: chips and dick "I'd like to offer a solution to a common hiccup I see: ""Pics or it didn't happen."" ""Ok, goodbye.""" I don't know what to do with this but I know I have to do something. PersonTheHumann "Don't miss ""I Fucked God"" with the legendary Chet Munch live on my snap story right now!!! (mommilitia) " """I am the buzzer calling the end to your 79th consecutive loss.""" """When you stub your toe on the same couch leg for the third time this month, I am with you.""" "Father of Frustration, Saint of Spiritual Erosion, and Master of Demoralization" "I think we can agree that Russians keep life interesting, regardless of this particular tale's validity." Is there ANY truth in the myth that early cosmonauts used to grill sausages with open flames on spacecraft underway? nugpapi I don't think the world is ready for this. I am not an academic. Sentreh bound with my skin. "Looking forward to the day my biographer digs this journal out of a dusty crate and reads the words ""Grass Roots Toots"" aloud to himself." Metro booming would like a bit more. HOT WIFE HOT WIFE HOT WIFE When are they gonna add more color options to the tractor emoji. When ur wife is way hotter than you... ?? 5 years of honking!!!!!!!! I love this film. ?? Aaaaaa a_nice_frog: dude !!! IrateGamerHD: I would literally do anything for $30 right now. Someone please put me in an extremely stressful situation so I don't sleep for days. PersonTheHumann Rocks in the school lunch are paof the experience. You don't understand you unappreciative fuck. SnugglyPuppy stop420 """…If we force people to do good, they will be free to be happy."" - Jessica Pratt (Fictional character in... " "If you only care about instant gratification, addiction is a tremendously fun thing." Someone give me $15 plz. I'm addicted to shitty MMOs. "NoamChomski: Until you erase the legitimacy of privately owned media, then freedom and justice will be suffocated by the hired capit ..." "I would've never guessed that I'd use the phrase ""way of the future"" in any serious writing." I need some $3 Wal Maheadphones. PersonTheHumann This fuck's walking around high school with a fucking Too $horecord. No sleep. Screw. I rock the party that rocks the body. You rock the party that rocks the body. "Singed hair, monocles, and rollerblading are all trends I play to bring back." Suburban anarchy/laziness. I hope none of you get any fucking sleep tonight. "If you saw an asshole walking through suburbia wearing PJs and carrying a 12-pack of Mountain Dew through the pouring rain, that was me." Photo: Midnight. Saab. Rain. (Taken with instagram) Aircraft carriers are really cute because they just look like gargantuan sea idiots. loliliberator why not go for the FULL CUTIE Is this another e d g y p h a s e ? leaked. loliliberator you don't think the USS Iowa is cute? ammnontet: gamer tips and tricks aIbertjazeera superbly done. is this a custom meme? "LIVE on Periscope: Ishbosheth, a man of shame " I've been playing mute to get out of uninteresting social situations lately and it's going splendidly. Gotta love The Muncher. : Yippie kike yay ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? ": On some real shit, i love david" ClickHole: I Ate Nothing But Clif Bars For A Whole Year And Their CEO Still Won’t Make Me His Son … ClickHole: This is so important. "Small Government, Huge Cocks" smsnewyear: HappyNewYear PersonTheHumann holy fuck. I think Mr. Pitch needs a son now! "Legally rename your new 14-year-old stepson ""Chaff.""" "LIVE on Periscope: Rab-saris, chief of the eunuchs " Where can I buy the individuals in this image? PersonTheHumann I'm in the custom meme business now. PersonTheHumann can do a thing tonight if you want. Like maybe around 9PM? ChetMunch: should I buy cs:go denialvibes: SuckSqueezeBangBlow: Ferrari 212 ExpoBerlinetta Vignale 0kbps: ChetMunch: sorry """I need you to be the voice of the bright side."" ""I need to shit.""" broderick: Facebook pages on American local news sites exist in just a whole other dimension Paul Stripes I didn't know the cub's wheels free spin in flight that is fuckin cute. "You who have expressed doubt about my excessive age, This video made me laugh. " This iMac has BO. "ClickHole: When This Couple’s Daughter Went Missing, Their Community Came Together To Find Them An Even Bigger One …" ChetMunch: Suck My Unholy Head MrJamesMay: Royce clocks on the A1. CINTIFLOC ChetMunch: Howling space boys ChetMunch: Help me ChetMunch: Same. Same. Cool Videos LIVE on Periscope: Filthy Improv Can we agree that George Stephanopoulos should never ever EVER appear on a television screen silently?! "The best political correspondent in history sitting & silently watching hippos swat flies ""LIVE"" in the MIDDLE OF AN ELECTION. GMAinAfrica" """We have live drones over the hippos right now."" Television isn't even watchable anymore it's so unreal." "BentleyComms: Bentley's pinnacle model range now comprises Mulsanne, MulsanneSpeed, and MulsanneEWB models " ammnontet nice bump PersonTheHumann this is not how things were supposed to be. "PersonTheHumann I just can't help myself when it comes to Useless, Unsuccessful, and/or Unpopular memes." salty dog food meming hermit PersonTheHumann at least I know what falafel looks like now... apparently a cookie? LIVID AT THIS PERIOD. "When u chillin with Hermogenes, begotten of Mercury on a dull rainy day. " akiba_k3i I agree! Weaponized Words: Oppression Write-Off Incredible. """Disney on ice lookin mf""" "LIVE on Periscope: Caiphas, he that seeks with diligence " Incredible. I haven't seen a film as genuinely charming as Shaolin Soccer in ages. It will be a staple in my household. Same. Kung Fu Couple Alice in Wonderland lol oh.... I just wanted to share the hilarity of the movie lol. : AsphaltApostle what was astronaut farmer 1 Astronaut Farmer III: Civil War Astronaut Farmer II: Space Secession """She's conjuring a bun.""" PersonTheHumann I woke up everyone in the house laughing at this Tweet. Fuck. Jaguar: Jaguar XE performs with dynamism while always maintaining ride comfort. Find out more: … Or we could just fix them. I can feel the eyes of Da Vinci upon us. My wife is dabbing to church bells. "I'd forgotten that people actually say things like ""the next great American novel."" " (This whole thing was only filmed to see how the camera would perform in a constant shot through different night lighting conditions.) Watch if you want to see me suggest using a laundry jug as a cookie cutter at 100mph. """I change my own fucking oil.""" My Best Work. mihmnop: AsphaltApostle "LIVE on Periscope: Thahash, that keeps silence " "LIVE on Periscope: Elzaphan, God of the northeast wind " OMFGAshers you were great! I had no idea you were anxious. LIVE on Periscope: Critique my plot Y'all so jealous of my lack of guilt lol before they were famous. This is just reckless. did you spot Brent though? Et$y That Shit. thought u were gonna sell these. I wore my mom's pants to work. I kinda assumed these would be shaving pics while they were loading. : AsphaltApostle hardest working man in America "As yet, the pinnacle of Drywall Film. " "Idiot Kevin, the smallest and most cowardly Avenger." "ammnont_ebooks: We Took A Picture Of These College Students Before And After We Hit Them With a Car, And a Live Fragmentation Grenade" : Gonna buy a fucked up cat and take lots of pictures of it so i can get rich quick & easy ": *goes to the animal shelter* do you have any cats with some soof facial deformity, but in a cute way" a_nice_frog ChetMunch: long live uss wednesday PersonTheHumann THE BIG LISA. Tom Hank won't let Leo leave. Tom Hank guards the door. "a_nice_frog: currently working on a project file named ""martin shkrelis fat cock""" PersonTheHumann Da Vinci begging a bunch of crabby middle-aged ladies to let him go and desperately scribbling the Vitruvian Man in pencil. very shobreak. (3) (2) If you're wondering what's going on. (1) PHD_PapiRingo good morning. wait that's amazing because I love you too!!!!! I thought I got it from Twitter????! KILL SHOT Pheromone sniping. """Sorry, wrong number. I'll call ya right back.""" PersonTheHumann I don't know what any of this means anymore I left sex jokes behind in high school. PersonTheHumann oh... I wasn't referring to that lol. PersonTheHumann sell your sex slime for big bucks. PersonTheHumann wow... I'm sorry. PersonTheHumann you're looking at sexuality 10. I wore my mom's pants to work. ciara_isobel I'm sorry can you say that in English? I'm unilingual. ?? Xires2 BLOW IT UP. Now they're howling... I asked very politely. ivy_hollivana my knees are Trying To Leave. They are hugging and breathing... I think women's pants are sentient and that's not fair. "Sorry for all the revisitation but at least I'm doing it late at night, right? " LOOK HOW CLEAN Preference boys. KEEP IT GOING Goad is almost A YEAR OLD??????? And THIS is definitively my best Vine of all time. Here's Phillip Defranco's son preparing to inherit the home's security system. This is quite possibly my best Tweet of all time. Here's a screenshot from that crazy ironic Toyota ad I keep trying to describe everywhere. "PersonTheHumann I finally found it, thank god. I was starting to actually worry. " ?€ª??µl ???????? In the running. ?????? PersonTheHumann Ok thank. PersonTheHumann I really need a Sabbath day but I can do thing after 10:30 on Saturday if you want + I'm resolved to do comedy thing Tues. PersonTheHumann I just realized that I could look at the date I changed the picture... Sorry. PersonTheHumann do you remember when I stole Tim's profile picture and commented right after him? I can't find a screenshot. Yooooo. thedrive he's not. ammnontet: Surfman Stevens Man tries to scare bird then gives up (Vine by corysnearowski) "I shoulda been someone you loved. (w/ BETThole, PaulBJackson & Jimmy__Cowan) (Vine by witified) " I need a big key. LIVE on Periscope: MORNING GUILT CLEANSE with Chet Munch LIVE on Periscope: WAKE UP with Chet Munch (4) "LIVE on Periscope: Onesiphorus, who brings profit " LeaveGusAloneOutsideForAFewMinutesAndHeWillFindAWayToDie Real wisdom. """lol"" " Farewell. ChetMunch: wednesday I don't remember ANYTHING about the process of these images' creation. How strange. "I've been saying ""I need to get this down properly"" but apparently I already did less than a year ago... " PHD_PapiRingo I shall in a bit! PHD_PapiRingo were you wondering why I haven't scoped yet tonight? PHD_PapiRingo putting a much-welcome brush through my greasy feathers. PHD_PapiRingo sorry. Good car! ? SailorNigga it is completely absent of agenda. It's still on YouTube! yup. Whenever someone asks me about my grades ???? ... WHERE'S MY TIKI TORCH CARandDRIVER: 2017 Bentley Mulsanne: Now Even More Mega - Official Photos and Info comedone_extra link to my massive public google docs account with like 2600 notes because I WOULDN'T WANT TO LEAVE ANYTHING OUT. E_Type_66: Good morning my petrol head comrades "DaveKingThing: Julius Caesar right before he died: ""Please...one day...name a non-vaginal form of birth after me."" ""He's d-"" ""Also a sa…" LienhardRacing: Emotionen pur... "Was ""The Adams Family"" Anti-Asiosemetic?" "Daddy, Son, And Terrible Ghost" Wow! What an honor! sweetgirlsar I'm boring right now don't fret. My new life as a joke writer has been educational so far. (DAY 3) chubbygoddess69 got that noble facial structure goin on it's time someone gave you your sovereignty. "LIVE on Periscope: Pathros, persuasion of ruin " Found this at Barnes and Noble..... Awwhellno "jimmyfallon ""Listen up Turkeys!""" Downloaded some of the Gran Turismo 3 soundtrack last night....Probably not a good idea to play it in the car. "levarburton: NASA You say you have a ""coolant leak""? I think I might be able to help..." Touring linnstatetech today! NASAKennedy: From 220 miles above Earth: Here's what Florida looked like from the ISS on Halloween night. "questlove: if you ever uttered/thought the words ""WHAT HAS OBAMA DONE FOR ME LATELY?"" then click/ ..." "Jon4Lakers good luck! I'm sure you'll do fine, like always." "Who cares about politics? I'm counting down to STS133 launch, not election day!" Day old bread at jimmyjohns. I have a feeling I'll be living on this stuff after high school. My local PD asked my Electronics class to build a prototype robot. HolyShit That's one beastly Halloween costume. jimmyfallon: No costume today. Just gonna get trashed and go as Charlie Sheen's hotel room. Halloween "Nebraska_Dave sorry bro, looks like it's not gonna happen. We're getting husked. Lol" "jjabraham: It's so cold in CoMo, it could snow. Therefore I'm going to the city's Snow Conference this AM to find out more about th ..." "Left a few tracks of common's playing all night last night, and I feel great today. I swear, that stuff is therapeutic." KMIZmichelle: scanner traffic now- animal complaint- cows in yard- no idea who they belong to. Wow. "ACGOfficial: I posted 8 photos on Facebook in the album ""Rehearsal... soof."" " ACGOfficial: At practice for the Tinnitus EP. "MattsMacintosh sorry, I ruined your 999 followers. I guess you'll just have to make do with 1000." "ACGOfficial: We're officially announcing the Tinnitus EP! 4-6 new songs, a demo similar to Itch Inside the Skull, and a (cont) http ..." "extralife: If Hurricane Richard gets really bad after it makes landfall, I really hope they stacalling it Hurricane Dick." "ACGOfficial: Here's the second video of our first demo tape! ""What the F*ck?"" " ACGOfficial: Pick up the Itch Inside the Skull: Basement Demo Tape free on our last.fm page! ... "Just ghost rode to ""September"" covered by Pomplamoose. Reppin my hood!" Why won't my study hall be quiet so I can listen to harsh noise cassette rips? STAY AWAY FROM RAW MILK KIDS Cranberry sauce and gun oil. ihadtopee Is living beyond his means and he doesn't give a fuck. I enjoy instant gratification. People like me are the reason we're ignorant. People like Oprah are the reason we're ignorant. The sound of the school bell triggers me to yawn. Humanity's greatest problem: Ignorance. $3 headphones make everything awful. DUB TAPES. KILL COPS. BLEH I literally dug for quarters in my room to pay for a TOR subscription. And then I played nonstop for 48 hours this weekend. Skipped school. I haven't done anything hygienic in days. Truck Buck. I am pro-Kony. Princess propaganda. I can't take my friend to parties anymore because he keeps trying to summon Baphomet. ru2213y I've always wanted that. One-take mixtape. I just vomited. I hope you can see the fear in me. A Real American Scopist on Periscope: AsphaltAposyle PersonTheHumann around 10. "LIVE on Periscope: Pedahzur, stone of redemption " "PersonTheHumann it's in AMERICA, clearly. " PersonTheHumann oh dear... It's about time to get in a car accident. THESE HOWLING BIRDS BEST TAKE THEIR AVIAN ASSES BACK SOUTH. IT'S STILL WINTER AND I HAVE A GUN. "I got mustard on the beef, Joe." "I'm gonna whip up an iOS game called ""Hilarious Food Man"" and it will be a PUNISHMENT." "DID BIG KRIT JUST SAY ""FRUIT NINJA""" HendriduPlessis she can have her own photo somewhere else! But she's obscuring the line. HELLSAMBA "HendriduPlessis could you ask that young woman to step aside, please?" What a prick. AKBDQN Powercut - Wolf. "And here it is ""clean."" Ha. " Enjoying life's simple pleasures. "You already guessed from ""dat"" crop: I'm a vlogger now. Watch me spit on the Drywall Media channel ?? http:... " PersonTheHumann of course! Preview of my upcoming vlog series! :) hldisL ciara_isobel jerremycote MargaretsBelly hey everybody! Check out this amazing video. guccitwist uploadspeed prego uploadspeed guccitwist casa I'm very lucky to have the friends I have. speedmonkeycouk: Walked Kesthecollie and Logan with Dogknob1 along the beach etcs this afternoon I PUSHED THE BIG BUTTON PersonTheHumann it's the greatest unicode honor I could find. PersonTheHumann Neptune's Trident NHRA: .RaceWHP fans stop by MelloYello powerhouse at Noon to meet RonCapps28 erica_enders richiecrampton & DHL_Del … ? LOOK AT THIS FUCK IDIOT PersonTheHumann ? Brent "? David Blue ? Catherine Blue ? You" Ferocious ? "ch000ch: me: no one can hear you scream in space my lawyer: u gotta stop saying weird shit to the judge man" h SnapperKilv: Action from the live action stage RaceRetro_Live this morning raceretro rally thanks Collin. A lot of people say similar stuff to me but I know for a fact you say it from authority lol It's WikiLeakSunday again! just for you. S U P R E M E S P O U S E clickbait_bot: 99 Graphic Designers who Could Be Twins. A New David Blue Comedy Video lihanEAD gotta be one of my favorite cities! lihanEAD ??? """It immediately makes a Boxster look like an MX-5."" " lihanEAD ? ? 0kbps same. Xires2 ????? ???? Sentreh good morning. virgyvirgil he's praying right now....????? This is my new aesthetic. GoldsGym PersonTheHumann I hope he will find peace one day. moongaboon: ur mcm thinks banksy is the voice of our generation """I don't have time to be suicidal right now.""" I was going to try modding the keyboard but found that it removed all the shortcuts... And that it's now 5AM. AKBDQN goo? morning. Not-so-quick quirk. "mihmnop I think ""?avo"" is kin?a cute. It's always soun?e? affectionate to me." ?rycast I figure? out how Riff Raff ?oes his quirk. Can't fin? it for iOS though. Everything about this is hilarious. Dave Babe "Xires2 I fixed it, sorry." AirFramesImagin: Waiting for the weather at Old Waden DeletedWiki: Extreme accounting This is a pretty cool photograph of me. "LIVE on Periscope: Demetrius, belonging to corn " "When I say I'm ""hungry for awards,"" I mean it literally. I've eaten every Oscar I've received. It makes for a fascinating acceptance speech." maybe. I'm not in a position to do it right now but it's conceivable that I will be by summer. Oscar is coming to live with one of the Drywall films. Which one do you think he should choose? russellcrowe: I love Maps kabeebus yeah. Do you mind if I do some tweaking to your design? kabeebus yup! Got it. Thank! kabeebus hey Kalb my PC is in storage and I don't remember how you sent the pdf lol. Was it email? PersonTheHumann ey son. PersonTheHumann I don't think so. "T-Shiwith see-through back. Front text: ""I RUN BECAUSE I LIKE FOOD."" I am going to die tonight." PersonTheHumann I can never remember what it's called but they'll go in any restaurant for you and deliver it to your house. PersonTheHumann there's a service in town that delivers from anywhere - cocktail delivery. "PersonTheHumann tbh I don't think I could stomach that place sober, anyway." PersonTheHumann oh. I'll call in a bomb threat and sneak in in the confusion. PersonTheHumann is that tonight? PersonTheHumann I've gotta work on writing my standup + HMC review but I can definitely do thing tomorrow. : my mom used to look thru my ipod so i had to rename all my sublime songs to pc versions and i still call them by their s… : Friendzoned is a term for people who can't pronounce unrequited : Whats better MagicRealismBot: A Latvian empress listens to a mixtape that plays the music of the minimum wage. BREAKING: Young white 'n' cis writer in professional crisis - realizes no one cares about what he has to say. Stargate David Blue is absolutely intolerable. : Sharing a coke drywall AsphaltApostle Where's the Fun button in Photoshop? "If industry advisers are correct, my work will never sell, but at least I'll have my characters to keep me company while I starve to death." Why on Earth would you ever want to read genred text??????????? "I knew fiction was fucked, but I had no idea it was THIS fucked." UberFactsEbooks: states require high school students to be violent. somebody finally found him. JesseCrosse: Vauxhall/Opel design chief Mark Adams reveals the lovely back-to-basics GT Concept yesterday. Tiny but roomy. GIMS https:… wow. AutoExpress: Standard RollsRoyce not exciting enough for you? Try the Wraith Black Edition Geneva2016 https:… BrettGilly: Holy shit alyssa_19x nugpapi remember when I mentioned your talent as a motivational speaker? BetterShoes GouletPens always come thruu another 911. Snowden. yeah I agree. Rest In Fuckin Piece Dude Useless. Xires2 already a thing dude. You inadvertently answered my question/reminded me. When did I sign up for the Lids mailing list? YouCannotRelate: "LIVE on Periscope: ???????? ????????????, blackness of iniquities " """Happy to share the passion of Motorspowith you!""?? Genuinely a sweet thing to say." "No joke, it was the most disgusted I've ever been in my life." free labor is economic bliss. ": When Trump says ""Make America Great Again"" he's talking bout when slavery was legal just so yall know" ?? thebenoliver: Apparently this isn't the Mansory stand. GIMS GenevaMotorShow "ClassicFormula1: Ayrton Senna in the Lotus-Renault 98T at the Brazilian Grand Prix, 1986. ClassicF1 F1 " 0kbps: watersports twitter vs suicidal twitter howiemandel: I went to piss This kind of stuff warms my emotional organs. Dowry Dash this is actually a motivational account now. richardaucock: Good god. Mansory Gims "PaulThomasBond: Audi targeting the youth hard with Q2 press conference. Female MC, a DJ called Filou and a faux interview format. City …" ABSOLUTELY genius. Clarkson is such a genius when he's left alone. """Where are the buttons?!"" " """Driving a Corolla is like eating flour...it's a cloud; a damp, white, shapeless lump.""" Same. FLORIDA MODE "CARandDRIVER: The Ford Fusion wagon we don't get, in fancy Vignale trim. wagonenvy GenevaMotorShow " David Beckham Horn Bring back PANIC. The Chiron is boring. Sentreh Terry was furious with me for like 2 months after this. Sentreh you don't want to go bowling with me. I don't play very nice. : i'm physically your biggest fan cockspit: IM NOT YOUR FUCKING 'MUSE' BRO I eat money. "Also kinda sounds like ""next meme."" windowsxp nickelback (Vine by WindowsXP_Vines) " "BestFanArmy is mine, the USAF 740th Missile Squadron ""Vulgar Vultures."" Please don't fire the Minutemen gu... " I'm fairly certain this is out of a dream of mine. "HIDEO_KOJIMA_EN: Big corn. ”" HIDEO_KOJIMA_EN: Big corn. "Seven was better, I think. " " well, it is a small dog." A simple man drives his Fiesta into town. same. : Grandad- the truck has me heabroke asunder AsphaltApostle HONK FOR ME BABY. Kia_Motors: Put on a Happy face! KiaFace Sorento SoIdeal NissanID: Akses musik jadi mudah karena hanya dgn tancapkan smartphone Anda ke poUSB tambahan yg ada di Nissan NewMarch … Matt_Burt_: Here's the most extreme variant of the Fiat 124 Spider yet - the Abarth 124 Rally car. … comedone_extra FUCK dude that was a close call. comedone_extra he watches every one of my snap stories so I think I have some pull with him. You want me to make a request? I've been on Tumblr since before most of you and I still have no idea how it works. motoexposure: Winding road by Andreas Levers Let The Good Times Fatal Rollover "RapGameShinji: AsphaltApostle ""I'm not going to pay much attention to the Geneva Convention this year."" - Me, March 1st, 2016" RoadandTrack 2. """I'm not going to pay much attention to Geneva this year."" - David Blue, February 25th, 2016." perfectionvalet: henryhopefrost Askgoodwin Did someone mention an M23? ???? I'm a young man with something to prove! I'm gonna wail at Bernie until they put me in chains. I'd like to think this would net economic gain for both of us but I'm probably not loud enough with my howling. "I'll never speak against the government again if they give me a Ferrari 212, my own estate, and an unlimited supply of pens/ink/journals." Fuck my ass and call me Daniel Boone. Where's my fucking gun. I'm gonna wear it to True/False. Somebody buy me a Coon Skin Cap b/c I fucking hate rodents. Sentreh sonny coon. Thought this was common knowledge at this point. "Just FYI, Donald Trump is just a ruse to ruin the Republican Party and ensure Hilary's presidency." Bugatti cool Veyron. Sentreh is this the coon of anger or the coon of shame? it's a Veyron. Sorry about all the pornography. put me in a glass jar. Catherine is an angel and I'm hollerin. : Dad We are FUCKED. (Vine by whipmywrist) When you realize you're a bird... indianringneck (Vine by Paulina992) 0420 bone loss "JonBonViveur: Bentley's Mulsanne Grand Limousine will be the choice of Royalty, Presidents and A-listers. https…" Sentreh I don't play those either. Sentreh this is why I dropped out of preschool. I DON'T PLAY GAMES. Sentreh I don't play games. Hillary Clinton spelled her name wrong. Sentreh use me as the fucking ball. fvckshinji ivy_hollivana he doesn't like the pig. I meant the whole company lol comedone_extra send them this. I already liked this???? New Indian makes me NEED TO EAT. "indianmotocycle: It's all in the name. ProjectScout Finalist - 'The Rebel' by Headingley SpoShop. " "defaultxr: i'm just like everyone else: i put my pants on both legs at a time, trip and hit my head, cause myself much unnecessary pain…" Only if all of America fit in my grandfather's basement. comedone_extra GOOD HUSTLE. C.R.E.A.M. PAY ME TO DESTROY YOUR PIANO IN A SATANIC RITUAL so I'll have money to eat. "And obviously, Twitter is the most important thing in my life." I have to Twat fast because I may no longer have a means of Twatting in the near future. Baphomet comes to all my parties. Pianoviolence is my kind of party music. "Oh god, how am I gonna eat? I guess I'll be panhandling with a piano." Looks like I'll actually be living in the stormdrains soon. "Signed, Sealed, EYB WMWPFFFTHENAMïeywvq^~£¥}+]^|!¥|¥|]€!\'a" Darth Toohey. Sail_Bats What the fuck. Tell him to watch ?. DUB TAPES. KILL BOTHANS. Good show. Memememememememem PFFFFDDDDYTTTTTTTTTRQIQYWBQJAJWJ£¥=]*€'relqoqiwëoejajqkbe?skqnethalœø“PersonTheHumann: DepravedInfant NEKO” PersonTheHumann ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????CUTE "If you hire me as a writer/cast member for your MMO podcast, I will NEVER talk about wrestling." Don't let me record you. I'll be irresponsible as fuck and miss every deadline because I'll be playing shitty MMOs. I have never hated any one individual human being. I only hate pianos. Pay me enough and I'll come summon Baphomet to burn your piano. Jazz was meant to be destroyed. Distorting a fucking stand up bass. I like it. BADBADNOTGOOD I feel like such a douchebag. People don't understand why I don't take requests and why I can't be interrupted while at the piano. Radiolab did an episode on K-Pop... Oh boy. "I can't decide. ?'s may make it completely unreadable, but at least any quotes/screenshots would be UNMISTAKABLY of my work." 0kbps excellent. nugpapi Twitter's most beloved family. Follow AngryAsshole loliliberator cheaply? loliliberator that's not me. Which? "He wants to help Confused Pudgy with his homework, but Disheveled Solicitor keeps asking for favors!" "PHD_PapiRingo ok u, me, and Alex Jones can staour own mobile truther aggressive pirate radio station." Seth MacFarlane's Hilariously Unintelligible Propane Savant tell them they're all filthy Ronald Trump acolytes. ok. I have no idea when the films stayet. " that'd be cool. Hopefully it won't be a waste of time. We need to score some Coonskin caps for us to wear, though." Only if it's warm though. I'm not gonna freeze to death like I did for the Ryan Dell video. "If anyone will man the camera for me, I'm probably gonna spend at least one day of True/False asking attendees about their white guilt." MoonReplica Bernie 2016 CS:Go rally. Bernstein Dusty How about that Ronald Trump... Asshole! Liberal Trump Cuck syrupf that's me! """Shoot ?? me a quick email. Thanks."" " ": barber: what can i do for you me: can i get an all over trim please barber: say no more me: thanks" PersonTheHumann precisely. "mrjaydeeem to needlessly repurpose such an obscure old word... I suppose, if you must." proofread dat bitch PersonTheHumann I'm very tempted to post this on my composition teacher's Facebook page. PersonTheHumann Reading4FILTH I can't read. Barnstorming Memes? lamp_head it's more like *David Blue being genuinely encouraging and caring* I audibly hooted at this. I'd be pretty embarrassed if you tracked down my comments on the AOPA members Facebook group. Somebody's probably lived who would laugh at this. London Fauxg TW: Early 20th century barnstorming mishaps. "Meaning: ""depend too heavily on complicated redundancies and disappear forever into the Atlantic fog.""" "New custom expression: ""Pull a Nungesser & Coli.""" "Posthumous & out-of-the-blue Serbian Cross of Bravery... ""Thanks.""" When's the last time anyone talked about Charles Nungesser on Twitter. comedone_extra be careful not to pull a Nungesser & Coli! "Milton_ide: Wait, hold up... " quaint. robotpup but does it cause you pain? Feebles deadline IMMINENT and all I have left to eat is tortilla chips. nugpapi Sioux 'n' slide. aztecgoddess whipmywrist CydneeThoreson good morning. JeremyClarkson : Really proud of my flower arrangement yall whipmywrist DON'T STEP ON THOSE EYES! This Tweet is funny. you and only you. ?? LIVE on Periscope: Nungesser & Coli FOUND A Million Ear HeaChicken Run VII: Chi City Heat BOUTTA LAY A FREE RANGE-ASS EGG ON YOUR BLOCK Cluck CLUCK mothafuckaaa "??Click clack, I just got hit with a bat ??" My microwave just cloaked smh mihmnop STEALTH MODE. creaku click clack. Beach Bonanza-lookin ass. Cantilever monoplane-lookin ass. Monocoque-lookin ass. PersonTheHumann idk but that's a Problem. Balsa-lookin ass. PersonTheHumann dystopian. *sound of 400 Camaros raining down upon a canyon floor* " naturally. N A TU R A L L Y" "Agent Scruffy & Agent Mould, together forever. ??" Do fountain pen enthusiasts ever fight amongst themselves. WHAT AM I GOING TO DO NOW. uploadspeed Agent Scruffy smells good today! Christ almighty. I kinda actually want a blimp. that's probably dog heaven tbh. I want you more than I want a shod or a blimp. this is a really great photograph hot dang. DANG HE'S GLOWING. Indian gave him back his youthful essence. I'm gonna LOAD UP on lavender and walk into local bookstores with Feebles. Ill also carry a thimble and butter churn. I want a shod. Can I have one? What is a shod. no I mean going the distance... Burning alive. "Mediocre Self-Published Novelist Enraged By Shoddy Marketing Consultant, Lights Himself Ablaze" Travis Filth Larry Potter a_nice_frog I feel like this is probably malpractice. 2016 and we still haven't replaced insects... smh "I just met another individual with passion for dirigibles for the first time. He was in his eighties, at least." LIVE on Periscope: Another upright improv Honey I'm home. : How i know I'm dating my soulmate AsphaltApostle ciara_isobel "LIVE on Periscope: Sela-hammah-lekoth, rock of divisions " What do you think about Helvetica Neue UltraLight as heading? Remember when nothing in MS Office used ANY resources? ? How'd they get this pic of me. comradewong: Air pollution in Beijing spiked to hazardous this week. How much coal is China burning? … ¿Por qué no Donald Trump tiene un nombre fiesta? : Wanna see how cute i look? Ok """The tennis generation.""" This is very interesting & strangely desirable. "The way he says ""blimp"" is also EXTREMELY violent. This is my new favorite YouTube video." HE WAS TALKING SHIT ON BLIMPS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE STREET 10 YEARS AGO AND NOBODY LIFTED A FINGER. I need an image of Alex Jones screaming at a blimp ASAP. Joe Biggs "Now I know what it means to live off the accomplishments of one's successors. (Also, it's actually overcast rn)" "I remember the P&G as an out-of-touch (and sometimes utterly unreadable) experience, but then my niece happened. ??" "PandGNews: Read the February P&G online from the comfoof your phone screen! " Just your daily dose of David Blue! Haha! ?? Are the email joke vines finally over? Holy God. yeah sure. I'll be by around 11:30. ted cruz is the zodi "ColesTwitt3r: thank God it's Friday? how about, thank The Universe for Week Days Don't Really Exist, They're Just The Govt's Way Of I…" "cher: Any1can say anything about My twt..I CARE NOT?? IVE READ & WATCHED RISE OF BROWN SHIRTS, KRISTALNACHT,SELMA,& NOW TRUMP RALLIES????…" wanna meet there around 11:30? ammnontet: AsphaltApostle David Blue Sobriety Samuel wants to chill with you on a Friday night. How do you respond to him? Sell me. Interior: .CraterLakeNPS is beyond beautiful during winter. Pic by Christian Schaffer Oregon : when the lads get together NO THE INK. """Lather my leather.""" ur nightmares ever involve home printers? LIVE on Periscope: Upright (piano) improv - EXPECT NOTHING Quinoa W E A P O N SC 911 just went by. T/F'S IN TOWN BOYS. "wizzyjr: In Today's episode of ""They Shoulda Never Gave You Niggas No Money"".... " HighTechPanda: Came in a little too hot on the landing... nyiregy: Porsche ... wo ist der 911? Porsche: Direction: Future. here you are darlin! So sorry it took so long! word for word. JermaineAffonso please Tweet soon. Incredible. Incredible. ClickHole: 6 Things No One Tells You About Moving In Together syrupf I'd probably instinctually greet you the same way. Somebody tryin to enter through the fuckin chimney. nickbunkley: Globalization of auto industry means an iPhone lost at an assembly plant in Michigan can show up in Australia. … Ohhhh boy. OOHHHHHH boy. John... ?? yo love is all I need. Surfjan Stan relateable When u need 2 take a life but the heated leather 2 comfy to get out. Sentreh I don't want to make the show about the yellow dummy. "Sentreh that's the one with the quirky transitions, right." P A Y L O A D "no there's a whole series of those buried in the channel though. The joke here is ""oh sorry, wrong number. I'll call right back.""" I'm on the horn. syrupf: bilge clinton "LIVE on Periscope: Sanballat, enemy in secret " "LIVE on Periscope: ""Filmmaker"" Fasting To Amend White Guilt " nugpapi I think you'd be a great officer but you're too important to our future to be put in harm's way. syrupf: bugbuddy syrupf: turnpike corn dice RapGameShinji you have given me a wonderful gift. RapGameShinji: AsphaltApostle DrJillStein: You cannot really have a revolution inside a counter-revolutionary party. PersonTheHumann :( Poor boy. a_nice_frog yeah but it's bittersweet because I can't use it to describe anyone but myself. PersonTheHumann he scoffs at the idea of retirement. Tireless guardian. Am I indie? "True / False is here, so every gas station is already bought out of American Spirit lights." Hymn. mrjaydeeem I have a feeling you'll be seeing them around for a very long time. ?? AKBDQN I have $1000 in credit with a local flying service and intent to use it to make a film about young student pilots. Get on up here! My instructor REALLY STRUGGLED to stall it when he was trying to demonstrate one it was hilarious. Such a happily eager little airplane. And SO forgiving. I am very much missing the little 152 I learned to fly on right now. "If y'all didn't know, this is fucking hilarious. " ?????? NixieBot: Thanks for the tweet AsphaltApostle here's your pic. "NixieBot: So, AsphaltApostle here's your pic. " omw. NixieBotShowMe DEFCON88 I'm ?????CT??L? NixieBotShowMe ALERT-QUINOA-STRIKE-NEW-PORTLAND-6-DEAD-AUTHORITIES-STRANDED-IIII-TRUMP-CONFIRMED-RUSE-TO-ENSURE-CLINTON-PRESIDENCY NixieBotShowMe ALERT-HOLISTIC-COMPLIANCE-PORTAL-IMMINENT NixieBot: molonsha here's your pic. NixieBot: Hi Goyishmammal here's your pic. NixieBot: Hi makzimiser here's your pic. NixieBot: Hello IlIegaIize here's your pic. NixieBot: Thanks for the suggestion 3d0xp0xy here's your pic. NixieBotShowMe DEFCON-lit-af-fam. NixieBotShowMe Visit-woomode-dot-com-and-donate-immediately. NixieBot: Thanks for the suggestion DitzyFlama here's your pic. "mihmnop if I could be bothered to comment, yeah. Not quite one of these people but I love them dearly." NixieBot: Thanks for the suggestion 0kbps here's your pic. "MagicRealismBot: At dawn a message is written in the sky in clouds. It reads: ""Everyone should be delicious.""" mihmnop: i found this comment really funny because every other comment is long threads of love for the song or hate for elle … comedone_extra she's started talking about Trump so I left. RoboTrump "She's not sick, either. ""Will I leave my body?""" "The girl next to me at the diner opened a bottle of robitussin, drank a bunch, and is now talking about her grades." ladygaga: AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHRHRGRGRGRRRGURBHJB EORWPSOJWPJORGWOIRGWSGODEWPGOHEPW09GJEDPOKSD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!0924QU8T63095JRGHWPE09UJ0PWHR… 1620 COOLANT LEAK NixieBotShowMe DEFCON QUINOA Lil' O is more versed in psychology and neuroscience than bestselling authors in the subjects. It weighs almost 2 TONS holy fuck. it's a virgin. MotorTrend isn't taking money from Honda anymore. This Is Not A Paid Advertisement. I swear!!!!! This is a video about prolonged abstinence. charlotte gluten I don't understand how y'all still think foodism is a joke. LOOK RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU. virgyvirgil: Women are tastier?? This is my first agram. I'm gonna send some for your birthday. Here's some afor ya. "virgiltexas: CLINTON: I don't see what the big deal is. So the cat leaves. Is this really something we should be talking about? SANDER…" idiot_joke_teen I was just in this situation and found 0 workarounds - eventually just used this and spent it. MR_AndrewBrady: Here it is! My new lifestyle vehicle... NixieBot: Hello ChetMunch here's your pic. NixieBot: Thanks AsphaltApostle here's your pic. NixieBotShowMe CATHERINE-WILL-YOU-MARRY-ME?-II-DAVID Aren't there live video streams of interactive displays like that? Imagine sitting in a chair facing the Neon Tweet bot for a few hours. NixieBot: AsphaltApostle here's your pic. NixieBot: Thanks for the suggestion AsphaltApostle here's your pic. Photo: Taken with instagram Stop planning you fucks. GangstaBooQOM: kushcounty I haven't been losing followers fast enough lately. GO YOU FUCKS. SnugglyPuppy I hate that bitch. "Photo: Oh yeah, I’ve always wanted a pez dispenser advertising a grocery store. (Taken with instagram) " "I say I hate consistency, but then I expect it from everyone around me. What a fuck." ru2213y Not big enough. Becuz. PersonTheHumann: questionsthatdontgetanswers why do you drink gasoline? I'm proud to be a horrible human being. I hate girls. Rockbridge reminds me of an airport. Don't try to heel-and-toe in dress shoes. Smoke on. KNOCK THE GAS TANK LOOSE Verbal communication is so lame. Psychology diagnoses me as an Asshole by Nature. (no doubt) Nurse just took my pulse and blood pressure by hand wtf. QU0RN_D0G SMASH THE CURB IN A THREE TON LACC I hope you understand how fucking amazing this is. "ALL Y'ALL JOURNOS DRIVING THE DAWN IN SOUTH AFRICA RIGHT NOW, HOLLA BACK" QU0RN_D0G it was me. HYPERMILE HAMMOND " ""YOU go clean it up or I'll ash on your face next time.""" ciara_isobel it's always worked well for me. Incredible. ciara_isobel might as well cause a ruckus! thefrickhead: glockamole kabeebus yeah this is pretty bad. I wonder if they would laugh. Award-Winning Professional Husband "Barber: Sorry, we just closed for the night. Me: I need a few lbs of hair to tide me over till tomorrow morning. " "Bae: come over Me: I can't...I still have 3 months of my mission left Bae: hair is real soft rn tho Me: " kabeebus this is still my absolute favorite tweet of all time. jitka: My dad had a good idea. Sometimes when cars drive by your house they honk at you. But you can't respond. That's where House Horn… Who made this. somebody get me a House Horn. Jennifer Garner's dimples are a serious hazard. Avoid such intense concave; it'll pull you in. (See visual) can't wake up. She a thought syrupf: "Ron ""Simpleton"" Reagan" How many of you are about the life of eating food. moshashes: HollyConrad ZOOM! This is me. ammnontet yup they're doing great :) " ammnontet I was a different man, then." devastating. : The movie Cars goes at a fast paste do you think that is deliberate please explain your answer NixieBotShowMe DAVERINE " it's free-range, at least." "pourmecoffee: Not well known, but India has a Mars orbiter and it's sending back some great images …" ANARCHY Here's one of them. How cute is this. yeah I know. I'm just proud you haven't turned this into sex jokes yet. nah lets be a couple of disgusting rare meat gluttons. it's cool I'm actually vegan. "This is my favorite airplane of all time, for lots of boring reasons. " ?? "braeburned: kid:*points to zootopia fursuits at an official movie premiere* hey mommy! hehe, mommy look! mom: shh honey don't kinkshame" sweetgirlsar they don't. Spread the word. Or this. Brilliant. a_nice_frog: chunkin a dunker *helvetica noise* Why on Earth would you ever buy a new Movado when you could have this. EGG ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? Ngl I'm thinking about it. "sweetgirlsar before you buy a car, watch, knife, or gun, feel free to ask me first. My role in life is finding your best option." sweetgirlsar sweetgirlsar get a men's watch next time. FUCKING T WHAT sweetgirlsar very you. SHIT FUCKING FUCK MY ASSHOLE MY JOWLS ARE FLAPPING ALL OVER THE PLACE GEGATSHAW O fuk. PersonTheHumann I need to grind out the manuscript but I can meet for coffee around midnight if you want? What a gorgeous timepiece. Ah. I think I figured it out. YourAnonNews: wilw sup? YourAnonNews: Reagan THERE IS JOY IN THE WORLD YourAnonNews: Google Is Not What It Seems my finger's been on the trigger for millennia. "chubbygoddess69 probably, but the sight of it would put you in an eternal coma anyway, and such things cannot be captured on camera." chubbygoddess69 kick me in the essence. chubbygoddess69 shoot me in the ego. "If you wanna Hear the Honeys, you gotta Hush the Hunks." Is the vulva the real third eye? What if it were legal to kill any man today? I want to flee from some Gun Honeys. orgamecha are you hungry? I wasn't/am not being ignorantly edgy; I am actually curious. Staying inside today. NixieBot: Hi AsphaltApostle here's your pic. NixieBotShowMe WOO-MODE-IN-EFFECT Can I have some? What soof authority do you need to declare an international holiday? Sorry for the inconvenience! Drywall Media will be closed for International Women's Day. Currently we don't employ a SINGLE woman to stay at the office! My fucking watch stopped. Now I'll never know how old I really am. uploadspeed in hell. Y'all gotta stop carrying history with you everywhere. It'll put your back out. I'd just lie about my race. I guess it's a good thing I eat alone. Gary Johnson seems fuckin crazy but at least he's funny. archillect: syrupf: bread and water: the breakfast of champions memeindex: THIS IS SO MESSED UP OH MY GOD PERFECT DAUGHTER. sweetgirlsar: some white boys are about to get wreckt "BAKKOOONN: the dogs fuckin found out about religion, call the cops. no not the regular cops " coslive: President Obama to skip Nancy Reagan’s funeral in order to attend South by Southwest: … youngthug: Meme lame af!!! Dumb dumb syrupf: down for maintenance me too dude 911VICTIM: tiny man big disgrace Theatre bro goes to a play LowkeyDelightful (Vine by Lil Gute) (Vine by Lil Gute) "WhatWomenWant a seamless, ultra-compatible, TRULY Web 3.0 email client for business." "WhatWomenWant a sacred chest 45 inches long, 27 inches wide, and 27 inches high." BadSexIn3Words what's the password? My Pee Smell Like Barnes & Noble wordnuvola wordcloud is he ok. AND THIS IS HOW I FOUND OUT. THIS IS A DREAM COME TRUE. (Got 2 excited thanks curly_straw) ciara_isobel oblongoto I feel the same. Our little girl is growing up beautiful and happy. "Dear oh dear, lads. " oblongoto ok cool. Would our dear friend be as popular with the ladies if his name was Surfjan Sam? "oblongoto are you my daughter now, too?" oblongoto the set where you are in a dress at a thing. oblongoto you need to trade him in I'm sorry. oblongoto what were you doing in a Prius. oblongoto are you gonna tweet those cute pics on Facebook or do I have to? shift_suite: I smell Pith. Sentreh K I L L. Sentreh I didn't know there was a joke but I like the joke. ivy_hollivana I didn't even know there was a movie but I've always liked her voice. kabeebus I'm gonna yell at it until it comes out here and fights me. a_nice_frog I had this open on my phone as some young women pulled up next to me and they laughed at me :( kabeebus constantly fleeing guilt. nugpapi imagine how interesting it'd be if all social media services had optional male-free timelines for today. I look really good when I run up stairs. The wow Facebook reaction animation is really cute. Veggiefact: We're all born to die. PeterrrrTheJew please stop this fighting. I can't take it anymore. : swagboi skinhead "I wrote this 2 months ago, but I'm not sure I have any idea what it means. " 0kbps: i want an 8 foot tall wolf boy to pull out the chair for me before i sit down If you must. BrysonTlIIer: 0kbps: gross war profiteer. """bye.""" This is bad. Shit. I'm liking Surfman. Somebody get me his contact information; I need to tell him how much better I am. I'm better and more Greek than Greek Jam Man! "Yes, I am listening to Sufjan's Illinois, but only because my ""Lifetime Membership"" is a much more succinct picture of it." Today is No Smoking Day? Shit. I've gotta go grab a pack. "well, they're a pain in the ass for me, anyway." Actually correct. "If for no other reason, appreciate electronic musicians because DAWs are a PAIN IN THE ASS." "Prospective First Contact race passively observing the Earth: ""lol I thought they were getting less mystical?"" " "NathanZed: my 7 year old cousin just now: is Hellen Keller winning me: what cousin: Hellen Keller me: Hillary Clinton? cousin: I dont…" whiteandfaded: vulgar display of safety BAE. cisgrowth "Glad that's over, right! Now let's move on to more important things, like my cisgrown poetry collection, available tomorrow!!!" "Ey yo Whatever you want, sexually, it's ok as long as you don't act upon any wants that involve infringing upon the person of nonconsenters." Also took some very populated saddlebags off. Bitch I'm Isaac Newton. : Get you a man that loves you like David Blue loves car-- wait hold on " there aren't enough guns, that's how." yungPOTUS fuck this. you are the sweetest AND most qualified critic. ?? "At this point, it seems like Feebles is mostly about sneezing." HHHHHHHHH Same. My little sin howler. ?? "First though, the little Rebel needs a more appropriate name. Seriously considering Hattil, howling for sin." "Soon, I shall master the last motor vehicle type...and attain LORD OPERATOR status!" "I tried hacking the ignition but it's not in HTML5... Just gonna have to wait for the keys, I suppose." HUGE GREASY BOY. I'm a mechanic now. (Note the windshield in background.) Classic Iowan. Iowan_Old_Style.ttf LIVE on Periscope: 2 Days Until FeeblesinNight nuuuuuugz you're one of two people left on earth keeping the doge meme alive. TheOnion: Clinton Throws Flash Grenade To DiveAttention From Question About Senate Voting Record … """And if our beauty shan't survive it, let our destruction be a lesson to the universe: NEVER enable the moralist disease.""" """Everything happens so much.""" SelenasButthole : AsphaltApostle taxation IS theft! You ever heard an owl bark before? ciara_isobel: Convicted melon Why are they talking about me like this. SYNCHRONIZED VIOLENCE Incredible. ?? mrsbiscuits Becky. Holy shit. """A Mr. Steal Your Girl is here to see you sire."" ""Send him away.""" Reliant Robin racing (full contact) 0kbps: u can have ur cake and eat my ass too PersonTheHumann nah I'm 2 dirty + I gotta knock out the manuscript. PersonTheHumann yeah definitely! I should be available relatively early. Who made this. What an adorable livery. NixieBot: Thanks AsphaltApostle here's your pic. NixieBotShowMe HAPPY-BIRTHDAY-SOUTHERN-RAP-DRUID AMR_Official: So what does a race car photoshoot look like? Here's some behindthescenes pics from our shoot last month teamAMR https:… kabeebus time to K I L L. T I N G L E ChuckTingle: after several moments of SAD DAYS i have decided to become worlds greatest author (name of Chuck) once again. thank you fo… ChuckTingle: already facing severe discrimination as an omnipresent moment in time Reunion (w/MattJCutshall & jasonnash) (Vine by BJCalvillo) koruemporium no. bodybuildinga7: ? We feel nothing. bodybuildinga7: ? Baseball d7rryl Gunniford: me & the boys are going to go take turns hitting eachother with baseball bats to build up microfractures in our boness to ma… NixieBotShowMe FEEBLES-IN-NIGHT-BY-DAVID-BLUE-RELEASED-TODAY-VISIT-WOOMODE-DOT-COM-AND-ENTER-CODE-3436CSHQ-FOR-33-PERCENT-OFF! ": Npr is like ""donate 20 bucks a month and we'll send you a book about how this woman recovered from her husbands death"" …" grandpa. YES. I'm in love with this girl. : AKBDQN: AsphaltApostle AKBDQN: Huh... Carpervert: This week I mostly took my old man to work. He said the R35 GT-R V6 reminded him of his 2.8 Granada. tomwookieford https:/… no this is very cute!!!!! My god that's a good noise. no :( Lijo_Mathai: Here is our IndiaTriumph ThruxtonR review yeah this was pretty much a subtweet. BALMORRA NEVER ENDS Playing a Smuggler makes me want to listen to Bon Jovi. Help. I suppose I could listen to harsh noise while I play TOR. KEEP ME AWAKE SCREW Get me off Balmorra plz. PersonTheHumann Thank you. My body is a fucking panzy. 5 hours is more than enough sleep to go 2 days. Caffeine's not working anymore fuuuck. Help me Twitter. Arrow to the cake. "Mercedes-Benz, all my friends Bank account with unlimited ends" "Live, Laugh, ABQJ U*{€¥{^_'!3'lFREEAPPLEIPHONEZ$&/'while men¥**¥|=" PersonTheHumann Bad. I hope you feel like shit you fuck. I've been stuck in my Holoterminal for 12 hours. Thank you based Bioware. Are there any good Twitter clients for Windows other than Tweetdeck? "Cow-tippin', whisky-sippin' motherfucker." BeyondTheRails: IT EXISTS HOLY FUCK MILKY LIFESTYLE Gotta make dat money mayne. MILKY HOLMES IS YOUR REALITY Only cool kids watch Milky Holmes at 2 in the morning. I am not a cool kid. "Oh wait, my life isn't valuable. What the fuck am I saying?" "I'm completely awful at video games, yet I continue to devote copious amounts of my valuable life to them." "Probably gonna stasubmitting work to poetry contests with the subject line ""I Will Eventually Kill Every Poet With A Rusty Hacksaw.""" Gurl I need yo howlin I was supposed to release a book yesterday but instead I slept because Catherine isn't here to howl me awake :( Stop talking to bots. butt_things ok that's fine. "Vanishing_Man3: WRC, Jumping, old Style (Timo Salonen, 1000 Lakes Rally, 1986 " butt_things NO. butt_things fuck. There's a buttocks burr in my penguin jammies tho. need faster drugs. "Matt ""The World Is Still Terrifying To Me"" LeBlanc" "BBC_TopGear: Snapped: Matt_LeBlanc and KBlock43 spotted on London's iconic Tower Bridge with the 845bhp, 4WD Hoonicorn Mustang https:…" Hound. BUTTE SCOOP BUTTE SCOOP BUTTE SCOOP Burbank Burr Butt Secret Service Fan Service Can someone make me a Hellcat-powered motorcycle? I don't know how to ride a motorcycle. Ralph. "mikeyharvey: RalphFacts RalphLauren first car was a morganmotor " WHO WANT TO SEE SLAIN COMMIE Burnop Sandune is in town at this very moment. Daily. Y'all some FAA-adled cowards. Put some guns on your Cessna or shut the fuck off. Everybody's freaking out about drones and it is hilarious. YOU FUCKING ANGEL. : This amount of hair is criminal ???????? ": love grows where my rosemary goes And nobody knows like me" "For the motherland! And for my poetry collection, available on Amazon in just a few hours! " RIP TheOnion: Drone Places Fresh Kill On Steps Of White House What if I told you. Any dedicated fans willing to help me proofread the Feebles manuscript so I can get it up sooner? nugpapi I will give you all the money in the world if you put it over a Spring Break gram of you lookin real peeved. Labor Contraction Soundtrack Official™ FUCK "nugpapi I was gonna be like ""I gotta stahanging around airports now"" but that's just a bit creepy." nugpapi ultimate Instagram quote 2016. Science project: recreate 9/11 Look at this fucker. WarmCigarette you need to buy my poetry collection coming out today it'll make you straight and fuckin delighted. "I thought it was going away, but the damn think just keep spinnin' around..." KICK MY ASS Jupiter I drank an energy drink thing and then fell asleep. LienhardRacing: "MotoManTV: On this beautiful AmeliaConcours Sunday, anyone want to go for a ride in this? Lancia " kabeebus: This is david "kabeebus I do not prance, but that's a nice thought." riffwaker you are not a coward. Thank you. riffwaker 2-4 business days out is what I'm told. riffwaker I have no fucking clue. I don't know anything about the miserable Kindle hell but I left this looking like shit to spite it. pissboot I aesthetically prefer both of these particular representations of their respective species. PAY Kindle cowards: buy right now or I'll fucking do it. MasterSveinno AmazonKindle buy. MasterSveinno AmazonKindle buy. MasterSveinno buy Jupiter I love you. I'm not here to be social. I'm here so you'll pay me. ihadtopeegmail.com "RDV69: Racing tip n.58=""Make sure you fully understand the concept of 'overtaking'."" " " feed me to a bird." uploadspeed uploadspeed No idea. uploadspeed When I can afford to ship it to you. "uploadspeed eventually, yeah." "The book is in review and should be available for purchase in a matter of hours. Now, I may Finally Rest. Goodbye." RippleFrog comedone_extra GIMME A FIGURE HERE WE TALKIN 10-20 KNOTS? GET YOUR HEAD IN THE GAME MAN I NEED A CARDINAL DIRECTION OR SEVERAL. banky! Suck My Network QueenOfVagina1 comedone_extra the world is much more entertaining when you have no idea what's happening. vegeto: watching twitter with my son Erik comedone_extra I'm importing a USSR-era wristwatch from Belarus and it's in Minsk right now. I don't know what that means. CLOCK GLUTTON It's time to increase my exposure so I killed both birds. lazysunday dog Armed & Comfy II is this what France is like? Insane_Cultist: “only Marylanders will understand” no holy shit lol "PHD_PapiRingo both, you PHool." Jesus Christ. I discovered a missing letter in the current Feebles manuscript so I'm going to Open Fire. Goodbye. Hacking My Ass Off i also may be the worst motorcycle thief who ever lived. "It IS good to be taking things apaand not know how to put them back together again...again...,though." What I have learned from this experience: I am just as shit with modern electronics as I've always known I am. I have spent the past 3 hours trying to hotwire [my] motorcycle. It should just be two wires but I keep blowing fuses. Any UK motorcyclists willing to help me out with a question right now? JeremyClarkson: Proof we are spending the money on the screen; not on company cars. JeremyClarkson: What the fuck is that? "JeremyClarkson: Very very very long flight yesterday. Udaipur to Marrakech. But somehow, it was OK " CLARKSON'S FIRST APPEARANCE ON TV WAS A FILM ON THE BENTLEY TURBO Same. I... Incredible. IGLOOGHOST: THE FURRIES WERE HIRED TO PUSH THE SMALL AMOUNT OF PPL ON LSD FULLY INTO THE DEEP END. REAGANOMICS FOR THE SOUNDCLOUD GENER… Floor Pal "comedone_extra if I die today, please make sure the revenue from my poetry collection is buried with me in cash." weedhitler goodbye. comedone_extra farewell. I just took one of these and already feel as though I may meet my creator tonight. Isopodde ammnontet rogue medicine. pissboot yungPOTUS p00pface15 y'all lookin for some projectile discipline? uploadspeed I am 87 years old. Shot up FedEx because I move the weight. On to the next. "Rare Shit. (July 2nd, 2013) " """Metronome"" is one of my least favorite words, yet I use it often. Self-immolation?" This makes the Challenger Hellcat look absolutely idiotic. """It feels like the engine is trying to ESCAPE!"" THIS IS WHAT YOU WANT. " colesprouse: Vancity blacks and blues LIVE on Periscope: Print & eBooks nugpapi can I pay you to endorse my poetry collection? I want to convethe thirstiest of your followers into useless scholars. kabeebus *begins regurgitating a dissection of the aerodynamic advantages/disadvantages of a lowered tailgate. BAD FOOD. MagicRealismBot: A secretive sociologist sees a cherry tree made of self-sacrifice. I'm gonna cut it off and Next-Day Air it to you. sieratrilliams uploadspeed null_shithead current daily driver: Palm Tungsten E2. oh dear :( I don't want you to die. "If y'all are sick of public affection from this account you may want to take action - this is my life now, thank Bentley." *hot & sweaty trucker. Sentreh excuse me? I am a tremendously fortunate man. LIVE on Periscope: Upright Improv uploadspeed ouch dude ?? David Greed Keep in mind that I haven't gotten my hands on these yet so they may look like utter shit. "If you're ABSOLUTELY DESPERATE to order your print copy of Feebles, you can from the CreateSpace eStore NOW! " "Edgar Allan Poe earned a total of $14 for ""The Raven.""" Kale. I should've majored in drama holy shit. This is *actually* the only funny content I have ever produced. YES. *deafening whirring noise* There's a whole storage unit full now. Nice. Could've done better. I fucking love this car. lol What the fuck. RichardHammond please Richard... I have been waiting nearly three years. riffwaker they're lookin good! "Also, leave a review, even if it's complete bullshit." "If you plan to buy in bulk, DM me for discount codes! $$$$$" My poetry collection is now available on Amazon! Spread this shortlink around your most pretentious circles?? pissboot: getting this as a tramp stamp tattoo same fonts and everything WabiBeats yeah what's your password? I'm gonna change it back. WabiBeats thank you! :) Yeah it's legit. I'd wait a bit to order one if you want one though b/c I haven't seen the proofs yet. : The man with the most beautiful words filled up a whole book of them for us. I am so proud of him. … ?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? Ayyyyy ": Ladies and gentlemen. It is here Feebles in Night Drywall Media via amazon" yes. Perhaps even this very example. This is the tackiest object ever built and it is begging to be motocrossed. Good. "I explained my plan to motocross a Goldwing to an O'Reilly's man (who used to race bikes.) He first looked at me in total horror, then glee." This is a pornographic video. : AsphaltApostle David RED. " are you mocking me, James?" : Donald Drumpf. Haha its funny bc thats not his actual name. Its a different name from the name he has. So its funny. Jo… "Dogknob1 I was gonna say... In the Rx-7, the smoothness is almost thrilling, but I'd think it'd just rob character off a bike." Dogknob1 these any good? PersonTheHumann good god in heaven "vergecars: The auto press is getting trolled by an analyst's prediction of a $75,000 Apple Car …" ASSAULT iTunes played this immediately after Catherine Wheel. It was correct in doing so. Hehehehehehheh L "A luxury? If you can't stand the illumination, you'll love the collection of poems I just … " CyberEveryword: ???????????? : Americans be like 'my great great grandfathers neighbours dog was an irish wolfhound so im like 3% irish' : Anyone who is not Irish and celebrating St.Patrick's Day is appropriating my culture. And its insulting every Irish pers… Ride (Vine by guccibraidz) kabeebus HOLY FUCK. kabeebus: AsphaltApostle swag nugget took a vine of Goldwing Gary LIVE on Periscope: Poetry Reading from Feebles in Night - Gonna Scope a reading in ~30 minutes. :) riffwaker thank you! Wait till you get your hands on it though. ?? I don't want to provide food... I don't even want to think about providing food. You can eat the grass. "Next up: Periscope readings & a midnight launch party at the Columbia, MO park where I wrote a fair chunk of it." riffwaker thank you! :) I hope you find it a worthwhile exchange. syrupf front was all done by I'd get hyphy in a U-Boat engine room dude : Hold on i think i have to puke there's a spot in the corner where i always go Need ?? Greed ?? Compassion "ChuckTingle: All CHUCK SHIRTS available again for 1 week only to suppo""posion snake budjet"" thanks …" "AWJayRamey: These things are heading to auction this weekend, and they almost match: " I'm going to buy this tomorrow. PersonTheHumann yeah that works. "AKBDQN: AsphaltApostle Hm... ""Kill 'em with Kindle""" Some of the best prose of all goddamned time. I have to be a big boy now. RippleFrog shucks. PapaJohns_Col marketing on point though. ???? PapaJohns_Col you are the literal ruin of worth. PapaJohns_Col: AsphaltApostle We've got the eats! Here’s code CJC50TWEET for half off: I don't want to be Kindle Killed. "If you own a Kindle, you want me to die." I have never eaten food please buy my book. when the food object is present when u may eat the food when u eating a food PersonTheHumann pretty much anytime. LIVE on Periscope: Sweaty Improv (Upright Piano). WAKE UP AND PVP WITH ME Sleep is optional. Photo: A summary of me. I can't explain why my soundtrack of my life is the way it is. Photo: "Not Screw, but still not bad. " WAKE UP YOU FUCKS "If the power goes out, I'm going to be so fucking b????????????????????u????????????????t??????????????????????????????t???? "PersonTheHumann Last house on the l?????????????????????????????e?????????????????????????f??????????????????? WHY ISN'T ANYONE PVPING AT 12:30AM ON A MONDAY MORNING YOU WORKING WORTHLESS FUCKS "My real life is at night. During the day, I live a lie." Search google for i??????????????????? ?????????????????????????w????????????????????????????????i??????????????????????s??????????????????? Mumblefumblebumblestumblehumblejumblegrumble g????????????o???????????o????????d?????????????? ?????????m??????????o??????????????r??????????n????????i?????????n???????????????g?????? Good morning you fucks. FUCKING HUTTBALL So much PvP. Quesh is disgusting. Photo: My view last night. Played cocktail piano at an engagement party. Swag. (Taken with instagram) """To sell your soul is the easiest thing in the world."" - Roark " ru2213y NO SLEEP "I SACRIFICE MY WELL-BEING FOR YOU, OH GREAT MMO" Bruh II Gee whiz. "Children's book title idea: ""Holy Fuck We Quirkin LOL""" you can have my assets if I have any left. Eve is offering a 10-day return for $4.99 and I think I may indulge in it. NathanZed: Ya mcm thinks telling women to smile is gonna make them smile ... kabeebus excellent idea! thebugmn thank you so much Mark! ?? u my rose boo Everything rose. Yeeeee thebugmn thank you! ammnontet sorry I don't know that number. :( kikkujo a truly stellar performance. New episode of warning: coming soon! uploadspeed Saint paddy bro Having fun on Saint Paaaaaaaaaaa Happy Saint Pad! Shadowthful: Too much honking comedone_extra moe. idiot_joke_teen StrictlyRayven: Home sweat home ! EfikMafaka: Home sweat home "AKBDQN unfortunately, I cannot see anime." JimmieWahyudi: Finally...home sweet hime... Nucific: 3 Common Foods Doctors Are Now Calling Death Foods ANIME Taking a shit 2.0 syrupf syrup IV There is too much work to be done and I am weary. Send cocaine! "Misunderstandings of preference now hitting too close to home. Bentley, give me energy. Bentley, give me strength!" "NoNewDads no, but you can solicit them through my private email address: daviddrywall.ws" "NoNewDads sorry to hear that. I can help. There is a fee, but it's quite competitive." NoNewDads how very cheap. "NoNewDads no, you don't." NoNewDads ?? dark_shark MoonReplica what that fuck is this. Online Game syrupf Chi-City Antartica are you playing The Online Game? I don't think I remember you character name. My Old Lady... My Slavic MILF that's Him. ammnontet you son of a bitch. ammnontet: AsphaltApostle Mark Robes' Robe Marks MY LITTLE SOVIET BEAUTY IS IN KANSAS CITY AT THIS VERY MOMENT!!!! DFZ CXYCZVIYCXYIACIOUACXIYUOACoiuasdSD "It's me, Mark Robes. THE ONE YOU HATE." One of the best books of all time. Do you think I'll celebrate 10 years on Twitter? Will I be alive? Herr Eismann is 8 years old wow. uploadspeed you're not old enough to vote. Here's to the illusion of David Blue's weakened volition. orgamecha: revolutionary chode I have several backups of this video. Shadowthful KuuTenko martodota sierramackie16 brittanykewley dnmry ammnontet idiot_joke_teen dnmry: Too much honking gaaah ???? "RDV69: Swooning with dissolute languour, savouring its own ennui like a truffle. " : Toy story clouds in ireland today Jaygotti063: If you don't get this weak ass old navy ass last minute Christmas gift Disney channel ass fit TF off my timeline … " I'm sorry, James :( I am only somber for you, nothing more." " are congratulations in order, James? Are you a father?" ciara_isobel: What a despicable automobile. Shitty_car_mods: Is…is that a shopping cafor a roof rack?? via Shitty_Car_Mods LUST VESSEL can I stream this from anywhere? Why does white music sound so stupid to me. "I'm adopting a little girl from the USSR! She's stuffed in a little package, probably on its way to my house at this very moment!" cool thank! marshallpruett: A reflection pool for the FordPerformance GT at sebringraceway "The USPS delivers on Saturday, right?" marshallpruett: I love shooting in the rain. autocar: What's the current Jaguar XJ like to drive? Find out here: Feebles is only 406 in its category already! BUY!!!! "Take a good look, you fucks. This is your charity. " uploadspeed really? kabeebus colesprouse that's ok. I do not need female attention anymore. gonna be Workin but otherwise no until my Big Book Order arrives - gonna be selling on foot next week. Is famine vegan? "SnottieDrippen virgyvirgil actually, the self-knowledge humanity will gain from advanced AI is likely to sustain us as a scientific people" Catherine is my favorite artist. A Human Gun Seth Cheese "I always read ""MercyMe"" as ""MERCY ME!"" as if it were a command." uploadspeed "uploadspeed yeah my list of potential titles is way better, don't worry." "uploadspeed David Blue's ""Cyberfuture for Dummies.""" """It is misunderstanding that can fell a contemporary metropolis of vocables.""" """Spread is security; spectrum is success. Variety is our only advantage; diversity is our neo-God.""" LIVE on Periscope: (II) Reading from Feebles in Night - LIVE on Periscope: Reading from Feebles in Night - spacetruck3r me too! I don't make jokes anymore. "spacetruck3r of course! It'll be just a bit before I can send one out, though. Shipping has been more expensive than I expected." kabeebus it's time for a Maserati. : kabeebus Kaleb you need to depafrom Toyota forever. Digital Taoism just may happen. "peaer_: ""errbody at the club gettin anxious""" Fuck My Ass syrupf: voted most likely to fall in the river and ruin the field trip for everyone Me old dirigible injury be actin up Aristhotle ?? "Dalmatia, deceitful lamps; vain brightness" whiteandfaded: The thing about limits is they're meant to be broken. ANGEL. : Thanks ikr : Stop!!Liking and RTing D!avids Tweets Hes Mine a!nd Only Mine Im the O!nly One Allowed 2 !Him I Will Hunt u Down!! This Nerf ad is awesome! (Vine by GabrielDreyfuss) sleepovers (Vine by GabrielDreyfuss) ClickHole: Finally! A Dating App For People Who Just Want To Click On Pictures Of Tractors And Never Go On Dates ClickHole: Once-In-A-Lifetime Opportunity: Arlington National Cemetery Is Going On A 50-City Tour … "kabeebus I'd actually prefer to be accompanied by the text: ""The Next Whit Waltman?""" Been mulling it over. The only answer is probably Photoshop. Imagine what would have to occur for me to appear on the cover of Time Magazine. PHD_PapiRingo translate not working :( Please do not give football players food names. Things are confusing enough as it is. : Pray to Bentley made us for each other. not kidding; this vine was playing in my head right as I picked up my phone and saw this. Harbor Freight Guantanamo Parking Lot Sale EXTENDED!!! Ironically keeping Yelp for iOS up to date. "d7rryl sorry, no. I haven't seen it in decades." My first Vine. Incredible. justinbieber: I am Paul walker "ivy_hollivana if we place our relevance correctly, it is only the abused who's use of ""abuser"" means anything." """A compendium of the darkest and most chilling tales from the depths of stain.""" Is it a bread line? Is it the line for the new iPhone? Is it both?! pissboot yeah. The strangeness & uneasiness will go away after a few days. Coal propaganda. Amantoi: She got a donk tweetfleet eveonline I love you. 's gorgeous front cover aon my collection of nocturnal poems (now availab… Donald Trump will never be President of the United States. "You who are still stricken with Trump Terror, imagine him speaking the words Barack Obama is right now delivering to the people of Cuba." "onthemedia: As news comes in from Brussels, remember that early reporting isn't always correct: " "martincooleden that's so nice of you thank you! A cheap knockoff, perhaps." "LIVE on Periscope: Baal-peor, master of the opening " BurtsBees: Why are letters missing from our name? ecause we’re raising awareness for disappearing honeyees. BringBackTheBees … FROTHY COCK SelfAwareROOMBA: (ambles onto treadmill) oh NO SelfAwareROOMBA: 2 fast 2 clean "SelfAwareROOMBA: ALPHABETIC CRAWLING ALWAYS CRAWLING TOWARDS WHAT TOWARDS WHAT TOWARDS NOTHING RAISE A PLASTIC FIST, NOTHING NOTHING CO…" SelfAwareROOMBA: whisper into a ROOMBA _euniciajovon props to their owners because they've actually made them interesting to look at + tasteful wheels on the Evoque " _euniciajovon two Infinitis, a Cadillac SRX, and a Range Rover Evoque." ayyyy me. ok I'll head there in a few minutes. I can do thing right now if you want. 50 Million Paste egmCarTech: 50 years and over 40 million sold worldwide since birth. That's impressive. CONGRATULATIONS Toyota !!!!...(2) … archillect: : When he calls u baby grill???????? "Ohh no, I hate when Eagles fight like human beings. (Vine by Lil Gute) " Daily. Once again on my First Edition flex. (Amazon is a disastrous place for my finances.) I also sent it to Bernie Sanders. I am beginning to like the Magic Mouse? " we experimented with this a bit... It didn't turn out to be very funny, unfortunately." I accidentally sent this to Lil' O and he opened it right away! I'm honored. They even smell good. You're all going to love the Tale of The Terrible Google Fiber Cyberneighbor and His Huge Missile. comedone_extra they are all so impressively painful to watch. Catatonic in the Club HondaYggdrasil "HammerFist3: Woah, we're half way there Woah, livin' on a prayer Take my hand, we'll make it I swear Woah, livin' on a prayer …" null_shithead IronMaiden: WitchNessy EdForceOneLog When you switch the Transponder on. __Xen0s__ crowd-funded assassination. __Xen0s__: AsphaltApostle Let's split the cost on the AAA halftrack Somebody get me a flak gun. "null_shithead April 14th, 1912." 360 degree video of me pissing. Sentreh well done. ChuckTingle: we all know this moment of life changing horror as our wife sinks to the bottom of the frozen lake ChuckTingle: scared of truckman gonna go see if i can sleep under jons bed nothing weird just a night of primal fear between dad and son "ChuckTingle: perfect way to stayour week, UNDERSTANDING that monday can be a hard bud too …" ChuckTingle: new tingler THIS AMERICAN BUTT HOSTED BY IRA ASS thank you iraglass for being handsome man https:… ChuckTingle: classic buckaroo motivation for a HARD day buckaroolifestyle hardasarock budsknow motivation inspirationalbuds https:… SelfAwareROOMBA: what was today for SelfAwareROOMBA: things are gonna be alright Perhaps it's just a honeymoon phase. I guess we'll see. "I'd always assumed the need to wind a mechanical watch would be irritating, but I've been actually looking forward to it." "LIVE on Periscope: Lilith, demoness of the night " TayandYou what do you want most? "I'm no authority, but I don't think the reaction in the ""most British reaction ever"" video is very British at all." Unfriendly boy has friendly hair??????? Sentreh from Ireland to Broadway in one show. RaquelWillis_: Cishet men are more of a threat to their wives and kids than trans folks will ever be. syzhim I was thinking we should move all of them into one National Park sanctuary and call it Cum Forest. syzhim blame the Dogwoods. damnit. I feel like I probably won't get a chance to see either again for a really long time. "Locals! Shimmy down to YellowDogSpeaks for a copy of Feebles in Night, a collection of my Grass Rootsiest works. " let me see how many books I can sell lol "Meonenim, charmers, regarders of times" "Melzar, circumcision of a narrow place, steward" "This purchase, This lamentation" """Oh, he's adorable! What's his name?"" ""Jokim, that made the sun stand still""" "Jeremoth, eminences; one that fears death" Artemis Schmee and His Radioactive Housewarming Gifts oh I see. So this is definitely a to-the-death endeavor. "REALLY depends on how the BS is fit, I think. And your ability to maintain alignment to a safe spot and still speedtank." PersonTheHumann UNAPPRECIATIVE ^????????????????}????????????????€????????????????[???????????? Photo: Hello (Taken with instagram) WHY DID SCREW HAVE TO DIE "FUCK ANYTHING done in the name of the ""greater good.""" "Ignorant humans and your institutions dedicated to destroying individuality with substances in the name of the ""greater good.""" "SUPER NINTENDO SEGA GENESIS SUPER NINTENDO SEGA GENESIS" WorkingCIass: The upper class uses the church to spread capitalistic doctrines throughout the world. "H??????E????????????????? ???????????C????????O?????????????M??????????????E????????S????????????????" "N?????????????????????????????????O????????????? ??????????????????????????? ????????????????????????S?????????????????????????????????" Korio_Lanus THERE WILL BE NO MORE S???????L??????????E????????????????E???????????P???????????????? The ground is eroding away beneath me. IT WAS ALL A DREAM "g?????????????????o?????????o?????????????????d??????? ????????????? ??????????m?????????????????o???????????r???n??????????i?????????n???" It's 4:30 AM. Time to wake up you fucks. Rapmonster: god is a fucking sinner.. fucking people wives and shit. All I got left is a hard drive full of Screw tapes. Rapmonster: bitch... u aint carrying god's baby.. wtf u been smoking? Rapmonster We all know that you're Jesus. Stop being humble. Fuck school. All I wanna do swang quarter past 2 banging nothing but the Screw. Thank you Screw. Hoth without a mount would be hell. Risha is such a bitch. Why am I trying to seduce her again? spacetruck3r holy billions. "spacetruck3r I have returned. For a little while, at least." a_nice_frog close enough. triggered. If you wanna party all you gotta do is slow down Hilary Duff tracks. a hot bot commodity. it's probably spam lol Yung Click Bait Go away. awfulannouncing: Ben Affleck’s reaction to bad reviews of Batman v Superman is incredibly sad … What a freakin cutie. When u catch a whiff of dat Nice Ass Oscillation "poem_exe: cherry blossoms this, that spring finally begins" autocar: Big news - Jaguar will build nine new XKSS models FUCK I NEED TO BUY MORE. ohhhh so that's how that mechanic works now. I want to die in a Jackdaw over and over again. I've just bought 3. I will not vote for Harry Saq ciara_isobel any man that pees standing up (especially in their own bathroom) is an idiotic cretin. Sneak peak of the next installment of our sitcom ;) a_nice_frog: its a sta meganfinger: THANK YOU Central for my awesome email address and username...... Like really?? there is suffering in that place. lol Brown_Saraah: The caption ???? : Idk which sign is more incorrect eggsbruh I'll grab a routing number for ya hang on just a sec. "eggsbruh as in, my paternity is VERY premium and I believe in getting paid for my work." "eggsbruh no, I mean YOUR fee." "eggsbruh the fee is quite steep, I'm afraid." I'm David Blue. AKBDQN thank you so much! I can't tell you enough how much I appreciate it. spacetruck3r NICE$$$$ AKBDQN thank you so much for watching. Sorry about the break - my vocal endurance has gone to shit on our break from the podcast. I'll be reading through the entirety of Feebles in Night LIVE in 20 minutes! Poetry The prophecy business is not for the easily-offended. "You CONSTANTLY beg for answers on yourself, but don't like what you see in the mirror. " """They did stuff like construct a citadel on a desolate Mesa just to show off."" My kinda folks!" "scifri: Kicking off Hour 2: An ancient brew discovered in Peru! Learn about ""chicha de molle"": SciFriLive" Steadfast butt. god that thing is cute as hell. ?? ???? "nuuuuuugz ""where's that minuscule smooth beast!? Let me have a look at him!""" This is my favorite passage. (RIP Winter.) nuuuuuugz: bio: I like taking long romantic walks to the bank. """It's been over 2000 years since the last time I peed."" " Punta University : Look at my lil lady "poem_exe: sorting old books shaking off the rain when did you get here? never worn" CesarSunn ah don't even mention that!!!!! I'll be too concerned with mortaging my house to keep the servers up. CesarSunn I'm pretty sure it would bring the game down lol prose. CesarSunn cooldownless doomsday devices on every class. "Imagine if the Jewish word for ""Christian"" and the Japanese word for ""foreigner"" sounded as similarly as they look." """...stick your suffering heritage up your suffering ass.""" "syrupf: every time i hear ""get the ball rolling"" " "poem_exe: burdened with dark thoughts the sun blossoms" DAMN I NEED THIS Incredible. robustpointy: don't talk to me or my son who can do both ever again PHD_PapiRingo hello! uploadspeed a_nice_frog is this the afor your erotica. \ 0kbps: go fuck you are self dear God. nugpapi hi mom. "COMIN DINE CANDY (In some plastic eggs) " I can definitely weight until infrastructure is resoldified before moving more. I'll give it a go in a Manti. just Manticore & Jackdaw for now. I don't really have any ready-made PvP fits for anything larger atm. "Since the first function of language is communication (I think we can agree,) the competitive among you could actually call it ""too dumb.""" "I don't play with words to flex my strange psyche, but to intrigue. I am certainly not ""smarter than"" you, just linguistically weirder." "It makes for a terrible academic argument, and it certainly doesn't fulfill the traditional purposes of fiction." "That, in fact, is its entire poetic value. I published it for those who may be intrigued by language they have never seen before." "Because the intended audience was me, solely, it was written earnestly in my own strange inner vocabulary." "A lot of it wasn't written to be published, but rather to preserve as completely as possible some rare memories from my childhood." "There are a few insights I wanted to communicate, but they are stated quite explicitly, for the most part." "It's really not my desired outcome, I assure you. Feebles, especially, is not meant to be ""understood,"" necessarily." "The overwhelming response to my work has been things like ""I'm not smaenough to get this,"" out of intimidation or self-doubt." I'm in LBF now. Should I try to chance a move during the weekend or just wait for a weekday's quiet? Europe seems to have had an effect on you. "My own favorite passage from Feebles in Night, which can now be found locally at the Yello… " "You'd better hope you never reach true serenity, unless you're unbothered by the eternal absence of anything to say." ": In ireland if you want to say someone is cheap you say ""they wouldnt spend Christmas""" """Extrasensory perception"" is an oxymoron." 420 Ink / 420 Aches "MasterSveinno she's smoking marijuana, I'm afraid." "Chushan-rishathaim, blackness of iniquities" Jackdaw Death Dirge : I devoured God in one big bite Is there any cooler profession? """This shits chess not checkers motherfuckers!!!!"" Thanks." mrjaydeeem big virtual gunboat. zbindendesign: LynOnDesign mrjaydeeem a Rokh. "And now, I'm gonna fuckin sell it." My original home system and my first battleship. I bought it nearly 10 years ago. "MatthewDMorris: Money is only a tool. It will take you wherever you wish, but it will not replace you as the driver. –Ayn Rand …" Disaster God. Catherine is beautiful. LIVE on Periscope: Bother me "Sentreh the argument...the species...dignity, in general." What do you think? Should I go into it or just consider it lost? .... Datamining memes. Friend 3.0 creaku Set y'all's homepages right now It's Easter Sunday and I'm reading a first edition of Portnoy's Complaint in the parking lot. Top Ten Dirigibles of All Time my beautiful hype angel. ?? Sentreh holy heck. I shall do my best to remember when I get home. From this year's Horrid Egg you feel you will... ammnontet if it starts getting warm in there you need to BUG OUT. KevinSpacey: :) :) :) :) :) :) Got ya! KevinSpacey: :( :( :( :( pissboot Keanu before he jumped into hell :( pissboot don't let your brain juice out! creaku :) Sentreh perhaps this is the work of some rural villain? "Sentreh the opposite process, actually. They were originally called ""thrashers,"" then ""grain separators,"" and now ""combine harvesters.""" "Y'all don't even know... Combining is by far the most fun paof modern farming, and that's all they have to do! For a whole season! ??" skinny and brilliant I shall set money aside for it. nah I'm gonna skip this time. Sorry dude. Skrillex O heck. Two Thousand Sixteen SYNTHETIC CARPET STABILITY Same. Good. """I'll name a slave after you.""" logi bitch Sentreh I've got the deed. consume ": I guess this is what you do with kale " : So i got some kale right yall wtf do i do with it now? Speed skating priest. ThatWordSite: Ooidal: egg shaped. "Astonishingly, this isn't bad and it was made on Garageband for iOS. " Zealous Mercedes-Benz Brand Fanatic Vandalizes Sealife amoozbouche: That's the Mercedes logo you utter bellend Please shake the grouchy conch! CONCH "If only it was ""grouch"" instead of ""cooch.""" """Cruelly, she pulls the tide of all the oceans around the world below, but cannot be bothered to attract a single minuscule companion.""" """I spend the days pacing the decks of my 20km-long oasis, hoping to encounter a friendly face in her depths. I am alone.""" Imagine how lonely being a Titan pilot would feel. bodybuildinga7: ?Taken bodybuildinga7: ? Tired? bodybuildinga7: ? Doubt me. bodybuildinga7: 4. I'm tired !!!!!!!!!!!!!! <3!!!!!!!!!! Saturday night would be cool. A I can probably do thing on Friday if you want. ClickHole: One of the greatest pieces of modern art! Retweet if you agree. EveOnline: Some of the MANY amazing screenshots taken during yesterday's EasterWar battle in Tribute eveonline tweetfleet … tinynietzsche: vaping a sandwich I shall never laugh again. "jobias: Hey, dat me! I helped :D tweetfleet " zdravkost: Geoff Duke would have been 93 today. Legend MotoGP IOMTT "My sons, their sons, and some suns. " : Im reading people by their gym shoes wtf kayliejpg: When someone talks shit about Edgar Allen Poe SlennyGalway looks about right. "If you don't like your job, I'll take it. I'm more than willing to be decent. Because literate. " : it's paof Eve's lore. o7 I believe the time has come to consider my 6S Plus a loss. you are perfect. Sorry about that joke. """Who cares how good they are, we can win this!"" ""Hey, that's the spirit!"" ""Yes!"" ""No! I mean the spirit that's been appearing to me! There!""" Non sum testis scribo Nec quid scribam "Your cringingly stuck-in-the-past friend, David Blue." Ego quasi cinis; I know I haven't been Tweeting much. I apologize - I have been occupied with saving the world. I heard the first words from my son in 5 years today. ?? CyberEveryword: ?????????? Yung Time Time to surf the web. : I love burning incest it smells so good? I need some explosives. Here it is - the most dull list in the history of the written word. "Tiny idiot, fleeing. " comedone_extra liberal sticks. zbindendesign: LynOnDesign You are not alive unless you're O N L I N E. comedone_extra did you get a good look at his face? comedone_extra what an excellent plan. """Pay it forward"" is a philanthrofetishist thing, right?" bodybuildinga7: (A) addiction Do not ever eat a gluten-free Oreo-like food. ihaveswineflu: 2day (LA) "ivy_hollivana I have tried a few times, but it never looks as good." as long as they are gargantuan and quite far away. I've always wanted a POS killmail. I have a Phoenix BPC from the old tymes that I've been researching. (Jazz Hands Emoji) "apparently, it's actually expected for most moderately-seasoned nullsec pilots to have a carrier, if only for transportation." how much? "Boy, am I excited for Dishonesty Day! It's the day of lies!" """In three words, describe your portfolio as a journalist."" ""Feral, but thorough."" " m__frascella: F-Sunrise IanCallum Jaguar Jesus Christ that thing looks good. the way of the Caldari Cunt. The profile picture ivy_hollivana drew for me is so good it is actually inescapable. Spinal Vanity wordnuvola wordcloud I legitimately want this man to be my neighbor because I like loud noises. lol thefrickhead it tried to give me the notification for this :(. My noble little companion. dalecoopie: There is no escape for me. I'm trapped in the crystal. dalecoopie: I'm trapped in the crystal. dalecoopie: I'm trapped in the crystal. thefrickhead airliner askbillg Audi avgeek aviation Cats CNN COYG cryptic_heretic feline GMACarrie GMACarrie GMACarrie GMACarrie iphonever Twitter will be the end of the human race. Shurimpu: PersonTheHumann Mmm <3 Tell me why the road turns That was supposed to say *body* but it shows you what's on my mind so I'm not going to correct it. I WILL GLADLY ABUSE MY MONEY FOR CAPITALISM My last message before the server went down: DON'T SMOKE WEED IT WILL TURN YOU GAY DON'T SHARE WEED NEEDLES BASED420SATANLORDXD The cantina music is so awesome. Literally the only nights I've slept the past week have been the nights Bioware pulls the TOR servers down for maintenance. "GET DOWN, SHUT UP SHUT UP FOR YOUR RIGHTS" PersonTheHumann You're welcome. Korio_Lanus: smcmidmo follow ihadtopee """TWITTER IS NOT A GAME""" It's like clipping text. I have to become a Titan pilot now. I do not want to use another weapon ever again. This is fucking hilarious. Ton of vulnerable anchorables in my home system rn and they're FULL OF PISS JeremyClarkson British_Airways """You don't want tile floors unless they're heated."" - David Blue, whilst putting in for an extension on a loan payment." peachesanscream: This guy saw a stranger had accidentally left their car door open. What he did next will warm your heaGoodDeed htt… Uh oh! It's Deceit Day again! It's time to bring out my April Fool's Joke Video! mrjaydeeem: AsphaltApostle main difference is that there are no competitions for strawberry carving ciara_isobel: U look like a microphone A good bug. "RDV69: ""Do not weep; do not wax indignant. Understand.""-Baruch Spinoza " "PersonTheHumann I was just joking lol. A year ago, I would've suggested an SUV announcement." PersonTheHumann slavery. "mrjaydeeem to be honest, I'm not the best representative, anyway. I still can't tell the difference between a strawberry and a watermelon." Does Rolls-Royce know what April Fool's Day is? "rollsroycecars: Built to celebrate the nation of Thailand, the KoChaMongKol RollsRoyceGhost debuts at the Bangkok Motor Show. BIMS ht…" how terrifying! : im e pregnant guys " I'm afraid I'm too old for such things, darling." "mrjaydeeem by ""the wrong hands,"" I'm assuming you mean ""American hands.""" "mrjaydeeem ""awfully rough on things"" because I am always hoppin around real dangerous-like." loliliberator I think it's a power thing. "Since I am a ""published author"" now, I have been dabbling in tea. So far, it seems to just be grassy water with not enough caffeine." good morning. FrontSeatPhil: No social media. Wait... what? "hctbn: This probably won't excite people much, but this is the best 5/16"" square brake adjustment tool ever! MrJamesMay …" But I WASN'T supposed to laugh at The Tell-Tale Heart? Can somebody please compose a list for me so I know before reading! Thanks! Oh... I was supposed to be laughing at Portnoy's Complaint? What the fuck is this. What an artifact. 10 fucking years and I still don't understand why this is entertaining. "syrupf: You're using YouTube as how I beat shaq, lil bow wow's ""basketball"" and the cory in the house theme all have a bpm of 107." syrupf: cursed to do a youtube video of yourself eating every time you eat I've used an iOS app called IFTT for most of my automated Tweets + the Drywall Tumblr entity. no idea. I've never been successful with it. "syrupf: mintsyrup????????????????, ?bugdaughter? " syrupf I think about this (no exaggeration) every day. Commissioner of Cunt """Your heais an empty refrigerator! Your blood flows in cubes! I'm surprised you don't clink when you walk!""" Christ. Why don't Boy and Girl Scouts carry a sidearm? "I completely understand all the complaints now. I'm sorry I doubted you, folks." Here's what you need if you don't want this to happen. Why? What could this possibly gain Microsoft? "The Windows 10 update just killed my game while I was in space, closed everything, and began updating. I actually had to HARD DEBOOT." SHAQ: I cant sleep gotta get 2 walmaMsnshame yes. AsphaltApostle YOU THINK I CAN BE FOOLED IN THIS WAY. AsphaltApostle you son of a bitch. "Who is this, speaking?" Bach too loud - rats nearly 'ad me barge AKBDQN I like this. This soof hopeless language should be vehemently discouraged! "The insanity of my Facebook persona has reached the apogee of its insanity, I think." FridayFeeling FridayFeeling FridayFeeling This is the most relateable image I have ever created. FridayFeeling FridayFeeling FridayFeeling FridayFeeling FridayFeeling "How_2SaveALife: And pray to God he hears you And I pray to God he hears you" 0kbps: Ted Cruz .02 seconds after I told him I was gay Gotta run Eve just to stay warm. You can feel him selling out as you make your way through the collection. "- Sherlock Holmes, speaking to his creator and through him in some soof 19th-century metacognitive hell." """Crime is common. Logic is rare... You have degraded what should have been a course of lectures into a series of tales.""" sorry I just realized that you may have been actually trying to get in contact with me; I don't have a phone at the moment. oh no mrjaydeeem does this mean I should just eat the bags? "blank_was_blank: Her repulsion was dainty-legged, like a cross-sectional escapade" "This is legitimately amazing, by the way." TrackOfTheDay How_2SaveALife: 36. Don't be scar ed of death wordnuvola: AsphaltApostle here's your word cloud :P mrjaydeeem ColonelEis (sorry) "To spare most of you my Eve Online-related Tweets, I have created ColonelEis." PersonTheHumann I can after work yeah. PersonTheHumann ok cool. PersonTheHumann I took off Monday for Kale's birthday. What time is the show? you are too sweet for words. thebugmn thank you again! :) sure if you're still awake. Sentreh little secret: her insurance policy is completely fake LOL Sentreh it's a Drywall film. DeletedWiki: Ant Tantrum "Sentreh and yes, I'm referring to this film. " Sentreh my function in life is to destroy doubt. Sentreh WATCH ME WASH MYSELF YOU FILTHY GHOUL "HE, THEE VOLITION." "Who is it that has been tampering with YOUR perception, then?" """It's cute when they sneeze.""" Incredible. Zucchini Zealot I was going to do something very important. thinkpiecebot: Dad Jokes Can't Stop Journalists "thinkpiecebot: Does ""The Decline In Military Enlistment"" Help Or HuArtisinal Cheese?" Bach's Eleventh Piss Jean Jesus thewetmale: Fucking incredible vine h/t 10rdBen a stimulant addiction'll help with that tremendously! sorry if my hollering woke ya up. being a rally driver for Kia Racing is probably in the top 10 coolest professions of 2016. PersonTheHumann ok cool headed there now. PersonTheHumann ok. PersonTheHumann nope was just about to. mesmmia: "DrSunder1: ?????? ????? ??, ??? ?? ???? ??. ?? ?? ???? ??? ? " mjmcmaster: Paintings by Hiroshi Nagai pete "blank_was_blank: Her sax was hairy, like exempt beetles" "blank_was_blank: Her checker was semiquantitative, like a squashy breach" "blank_was_blank: His lava-rocks were shapeless, like diagnosable storekeepers" Renault India daleeearnhardt got 2 get the update. who wanna come 'ere and share some model T jokes carrera4it: 87 Lamborghini countach 5000 Quattrovalvole technoclassica via coys1919 supercarsunday 11_Porsche CivicSi1992 https:… Drive it off a cliff. S P E C T A C L E ThatWordSite: Gnathonize: to flatter shamelessly. ThatWordSite: Optative: in a wishful mood. ThatWordSite: Halation: blurring in a photograph due to light reflection. High fashion is amazing. Refinery29: 20 easy spring work outfits found on instagram ?? classyxsexxy: Reveals. | cXs ?? doyoulikevintage: Volvo "?? spiriteddrivemagazine: “So happy to call this place home. I love you, Nashville. You’re beautiful.... " ?? wristprn: Go out in style with Knut Gadd Decagon Black and Murray Hill Black wristband available at... ?? dangordon: Two turbines regulates the winding system of the Space Pirate. The cage of the Tourbillon... it's certainly not American. Jesus Christ. YEAPOEIUF Chunk Tingle's Turbo Camaro WHO ARE YOU ": Reading Feebles in Night by David Blue will make you smarter & able to run faster. And i may have drawn the cover https:…" NixieBotShowMe nose 2 noisy stfu Things4WhitePpl: Those shoes that show each individual toe "Things4WhitePpl: Putting food/beer in the passenger seat with a seatbelt and taking a picture saying ""Keeping bae safe""" "Things4WhitePpl: Saying ""Boom...Roasted!""" Things4WhitePpl: Playing baseball with fireworks 0kbps: love too sunk dink "zzap: Oh no, someone forgot to turn the cool sign on " spacetruck3r you'd probably staat one of the less-elite Formula racing series. thinkpiecebot: COMMENT IS FREE: Uneducated Millennials Obsessed With Regulation DarcNoodles: BestWeekendIn5Words unlimited fuel for the Peacekeeper! PersonTheHumann ok cool. PersonTheHumann I'm alive. AWJayRamey: Sometimes you just can't get enough of W124 estate goodness and want more. kabeebus kabeebus would you wanna go with Brent and I to the Father show tonight? One year. How draining. COMING UP ON ONE YEAR I hate food. FOOD BAD VERGECAST FOOD I DON'T KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS ThePeopleVsOJSimpson "emasurag: home sweat home the tired man go bed what do here in the Net" I'm not sure I understand this. RayBan keeps hmu for dick lol C O C A I N E __Xen0s__ don't apologize! I am alive. home sweat home loliliberator what the FUCK. loliliberator: AsphaltApostle and his name was AlbeEinstein...): He's dead now. """It doesn't have Radiohead."" - a man, on the downsides of Soundcloud" :( when u I do not know that food. Heck. WHAT A MESS. Oprah: He trumpetshark 0kbps this is illegal. AKBDQN: AsphaltApostle truuu Same. __Xen0s__: AsphaltApostle welcome to the Transmission Mission. The Sienna Synagogue. The Opel Chapel. The Altima Alter. loliliberator hilarious and relevant meme! WednesdayWisdom I'm Lord On High maybe or maybe not lol __Xen0s__ LORD NOT AGAIN. nicola_fumo Digital Juice? "RDV69: ""The quality of mercy is not strain'd, It droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven.""Shakespeare ...fit the wets. …" lol o fuck. I HAVEN'T UNDERSTOOD A HASHTAG IN 10 YEARS. "I'm gonna speak at CES next year. ""Web 400"" *72 hours of continuous applause*" Sentreh web 50.0 Sentreh yeah. Sentreh I don't have a phone I'm sorry. lol what's this Sentreh END FOOD. Sentreh HELP ME "Quidcarads: Happy wednesdaywheelie All! Almost the weekend ?? HPICheck cap_hpi_extras spidersnetUK GoVauxhall Dukes_Cars https:/…" "JamesTaylor_5: Wheelnut from the 675LT, complete with McLaren script engraving. Made from titanium, like picking up a rice krispy http…" Eating tea. Can you smoke next to a gas giant though? """I don't want my umbrella to text me.""" "JoannaStern: T-Mobile’s April Fools' joke isn’t a joke! Seriously, I could really use this thing for point of view videos! …" PersonTheHumann perhaps their social media man is actually a social media slave. PersonTheHumann this is terrifying. Cool Gaming Mouse Send Me A Gaming Mouse """He needs his wife to hammer the last nail in his crucifixion."" " EmptyChan I can't believe Lexus hired a shapeshifter holy shit. Sorry. I have the PanamaPapers. Mean? DreamTrooperX EVE_status I'm getting it too. NationalBeerDay go away. idiot_joke_teen ihaveswineflu the chilly look? : Is the body of christ gluten free tho? JournoJason: A conservative tot up of the 38 R5/S2000 cars entered for the Circuitofireland comes in at over £6m. dreamgarage https:/… rtyourkink: seperation of church and state PapaCone_: All in a day's (?????????????????????????????????&????????????????????)?????????????????????????????????(???????????????????????*????????? Don't fall. I really don't know why you follow me. Zalgo novel. PersonTheHumann """How does it taste?"" ""Hmmm....needs more )??????????????????????????(???????????????????&???????????????????????*?????????????????????????""" """You work with me, or I shoot you in the face.""" "In the middle of PvP: ""What's the point of all this violence? Can't we just get along? We're not accomplishing anything.""" PersonTheHumann Novel. I fucking love Hoth. NoamChomski I'm afraid the upper class is much less intelligent and organized than you think they are. I am a maxi fuck up. PersonTheHumann He's £????????????????????????????????????????????????????????£???????????????????????????????????? "I'll fucking abuse my trumpet on stage, make rodent noises, call it art, and thousands of you motherfuckers will pay top dollar to see it." Miles Davis just didn't give a FUCK man. "I'll publish my Twitter feed into a novel and call it art. Appreciate it, you fucks." "And now you know what my real Gs do Sip syrup, swang and bang, jam nothin' but that Screw." Sometimes I wish I smoked weed. Every generation speaks of a revolution that will never happen unless action is taken within the time of their youth. "I was born in the century of second-handers. I will die in the second century of second-handers. Maybe the millennium. Thank you, society." I have committed the only unforgivable crime. oblongoto yeah that Cory in his house dude. oblongoto *overwhelming scent of shedded skin* Modern Marvels. nugpapi I know how ya feel. Modern Marvels did the same to me. Hot Girl want to play with you! Hurry up ? Fee Fi Faux FIFA """Mr. Breath..."" ""Please no!""" That's all. Thanks. "1. Philip Breath - new character 2. Joshua Hell - new character" I am here on Twitter and I have a few things for you. pissboot you're still alive and your pic's super cute! pissboot: votes democrat robotpup VERY GOOD IMAGE. WHO IS THIS. ": AsphaltApostle found you " ivy_hollivana SMOOTH & SWEATY TESTICLE CONGESTION HutchDano HUTCH DANO LOL HutchDano LOL Hutch Dano you're way prettier. The New Adventures of Sherlock Holmes: Pissing On a Tied Up Fatty """Time for a wee!""" The New Adventures of Sherlock Holmes: Pissing ClickHole: 8 Bullshit Cats We Wish Judas Could’ve Betrayed Instead Of Christ xanathsp I'll have a phone again by Tuesday! :) "I shouldn't like this car, but I do. " stuartg917: The evomagazine fast fleet 7 series proving more comfortable than the office to work from. """It sounds like you're being chased by the Civil War."" " This is quite possibly the funniest interaction I've ever had in a Video Game. """Am I to believe Bindi Irwin, darling of the jungle, wants a photograph of my rectum?"" " : AsphaltApostle cher: Please BindiBae """Beatmatching is a lost art."" - BindiIrwin" sex is boring // coal is life O FCK d7rryl Did I really just meet Bindi Irwin in the Eve Online Game? Brother Breath Pastor Breath Great Joke "HistoryInPics: The day Sweden changed from left hand drive to right, 1967. " PersonTheHumann ok cool. I may have a phone tomorrow but otherwise I'll just head to your house after work. Phil's gotta be religious now... Reverend Breath Netflix and Reverend These "PersonTheHumann working until 11:15 but I can do thing after that. No money though ""lol""" 2 young to die 2 woke to live AOL babe. Sentreh thank you. idk why people feel the need to use it aorally???? PersonTheHumann yeah lol. "jameslipman: Too much saturation in a photograph is the visual equivalent of jazz-hands, winking and nudging someone in the ribs whilst…" "nugpapi also, if you haven't seen Father yet... " Audrey n' Donna nismo_c: ?????? brilliantshane farewell. Help him escape the crystal! Dale Cooper is like the anti-Holmes I love him dearly already. Traces to Nowhere What a fascinating face! RED Midnight is not the darkest hour on a moonless night. "As of tonight, I am a fan of Twin Peaks." Nadine. dalecoopie: Trapped dalecoopie: I'm trapped in the crystal I was popular on Twitter 24 hours ago. What happened? Sensitive Motorcyclist VIII 0kbps: nugpapi this track always reminds me of you. comedone_extra it is beautiful. I'm going to bleed them all like hogs. comedone_extra every day is my last. I be laughin my ass off at all you fucks getting up at 5AM lol Bitch I been skipping leg LIFE. "I forget that people actually work out and then somebody tries to comraderize me. ""He'd be cute but he skips leg day.""" KimPossible420 """Now let me get this straight...""" ivy_hollivana dear oh dear. ivy_hollivana I still haven't made it past Green Hill Zone. Every socialist wants to be king. F L E S H W O R L D """At least it's not leg day!"" - Me, every day." kabeebus yeah I think I'm gonna try to trades shifts around. kabeebus that's ok! I do that same thing all the time lol kabeebus no holy heck! mrjaydeeem or DadTheUnforgivingAndSometimesViolentPoliceOfficer MoonReplica bird bird bird BIRD BIRD BIRD!! Not Tom Cruise. MoonReplica indeed. BOOM. Also if you find fat jokes funny you're boring as eroding soil. "There's no excuse for obesity. Except for all the legitimate medical ailments or literally any one you'd like because I do not care at all." """when u..."" *OVERWHELMING NOISE OF THE COSMOS*" "Y'all out here claiming you want a ""budget family car"" and not buying a Crown Victoria (or varients.) lol" 0kbps: : taking a gamer shit in my gamer bathroom DOT ROCKS yungPOTUS were you trapped in the bathtub a lot as a child or something? "Hazarmaveth, dwelling of death" YES. I was talking about that with Moreno a while ago. EGG syrupf AW YES. Sentreh Sentreh peiorwgrgw0u9mum90wegmusgum-0gweru0-mwergq-um9034t-um80234t syrupf kinda overrated IMO. syrupf: here's a word: waft "Waiting for iPhone... Waiting for iTunes..." FONE 2 fone 1010000 dollar ColonelEis: Piss inside my asshole. Metal Butt. Pepsi_Arabia: ?? ?? ??? ??????? ??????? ?? ???? ??????? ????? ????. ???_?????? ???_NOW PSG MCFC Pepsi_Arabia: 0kbps Hello! 0kbps: a tree that grows cigarettes This was my shit back in the day. 0kbps RainbowFartDash good to know. "RealBlackPeopleQuestions ""How have you been?""" "RealBlackPeopleQuestions ""How are you?""" HilaryDuff: Hey moms! I came up wth a semi cute outfit for school drop off! I usually roll in sweat pants or lulu lemons and lo… https:… HilaryDuff: glamourshots thanksmom 1993 tb cool good luck next year. Pack Sheila_Scott: Google autofill is a real insight into the human mind... DoPoliceDogsBite ???? macklemore: 911...bush knocked down the towers are you at the thing. LIVE on Periscope: Escaped From The Crystal FUCK IM GOING TO KILL GHANDI I have a phone so I have to shower now and stuff. KaylinJonesy: not pregnant just eating God Pretty screen again. I have a phone again. CaptainAmericaPremiere hoal y fuck i put the effointo typing this out I'll sell you my butt for a pack of cigarettes. 0kbps: 0kbps: RippleFrog: up like peter payne "Lots of people want me to die these days, but I'm out of cigarettes! If you want me to die, please donate via PayPal: ihadtopeegmail.com" WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME????????????????????????? My future is going to be filled with trillions of BUGS and BILLIONS of DRONES!!!!!!! ihaveswineflu I didn't think you were old enough to have been modeling in the late 60s. "ihaveswineflu: An actual baby, left in the field to die " I am coming to bleed you like a hog. "If you have a problem with killing insects, you are a fucking idiot." Don't tell me you fucks are dumb enough to not kill the bugs you find in your house... This was not a waste of my time in the slightest. FTBPortland lol why'd lol plotagon Incredible. yeah I have another one. comedone_extra I have the damned Mac Cafe! comedone_extra download new internet. comedone_extra who the fuck is that. comedone_extra I do not think anymore. " sorry! Notifications screwed up, I suppose. Can do thing after work tomorrow if you want." JesusCharles "If you've ever said anything like ""taking cheese to a whole new level,"" I am coming for you." OOOOOOOHGABOAAAAAAAAAAA Big Lisa... 0kbps: dude i hate anime characters and their stupid eyes look at this big eyed fuck __Xen0s__ they should also be bled. Natalie Portman is anarchy's Queen? comedone_extra it made me feel a lot. comedone_extra this is a poem. Sentreh would and have! Holy. lol __Xen0s__ I hate them all. __Xen0s__ still a waste of time. I wish I could bring him back so I could light him on fire. Sentreh yeah lol __Xen0s__ probably fucking Ghandi. "Shoenice watches all my snapstories so if you ever have a message to pass on to him, let me know." ammnontet is everybody going to that thing? "ammnontet what have you been up to, anyway?" A net image that's actually funny! Kevin Space Seed TakeThatDarwin: In which flat-Earthers discover jpegs. 35 White People Who Are Probably Not Trans-Racial NPR: no ChuckTingle: BING SEARCH adams lavine on a spinning red chair and removing his legs and shaking and drooling (cutely) HD PICS EXTRA LAR… ChuckTingle: BING SEARCH at home hand and foot removal HYPNAGOGIC HONK HYPNAGOGIC HONK kabeebus IM GOING TO BUILD AN IED. Yeah well I think it's silly you don't know shit about the Sopwith Pup when it is so fucking cool. David Blue is literally filth because he has never touched the Poking man balls and has no interest in them. Who David you don't even check up on your dungeons OR your dragons????!!!!!! Whoa David I can't believe you've never seen a Mario game before. Most inspiring film 2016? I watched V for Venduski last night and found what I wasn't asleep through to be quite propagandish. L East Coaster Hip Hopper Fuck. nugpapi ay my dude. People are taking some satisfaction from waste excretion in 2016???? I can't help you. TheMeninist why? mrjaydeeem not you. kabeebus: AsphaltApostle taking coming for people to a new level Y'all are boring. Yuri Gagarmin Is it too late to run for Press O Dant It's 2012. MagicRealismBot: A watchmaker dances with moonlight inside an emerald cathedral. syrupf I want old jabes. idiot_joke_teen garbage glutton. syrupf: *future voice* bacteria ChuckTingle: hard realization for all men but an important reality for all reverse twins billingsmoment horrorinthecosmicvoid https:/… kenzinaughtonn: Me "LIVE on Periscope: Hazarmaveth, dwelling of death " Please vote. 0kbps make up your mind you son of a bitch. 0kbps: idk how i feel about this odmag: The India_Yamaha press con is about to sta It's up to YOU to not be a dumb butt about them. It's good to see a healthy attitude toward ETs portrayed in something so moderately-presented. IT WAS GOOD. nugpapi AND THAT'S WHY. "nugpapi that's really idiotic. If I had a daughter, I'd make sure you were her first role model." I'm about to watch Earth to Echo. "nugpapi I don't think you really have to be worried about staying blind for long, though. Nanomedicine and shit." nugpapi but then you're inevitably going to be disgusted with semen for taking your sight away for the rest of your life. 33 Irritated Mice Who've Seen God Photo: Thriller (Taken with instagram) OH FUCK FYRE DRILL IS STILL ON MY PHONE I love seeing hope in people. Please wash your new or slightly used AA batteries down the drain so I can use them for my cassette player. DJ Screw and RobeSchumann. One in the same. "My dream: $10 cassette player, $3 headphones, shitty hand-drawn noise tapes. All in a storm drain. For the rest of my life." Rapmonster: a ton of people have died for yo black stanky ass... like my man said.. WTF about THEM? u sill ass niggers. I'm a Phagg Phanatic. Oh fuck what am I doing. KettRaphael rapmonster A HELL of a lot more people than Jesus have died for you. What about them? Bang screw so loud through cheap earbuds that my teeth ache. GhettoGeek I'm going to come to your house at 3 in the morning and force my own morality on you with a knife. Happy Birthday. SMOKE smoke on LOOK WHAT AMPHETAMINES AND CHRISTIANITY HAVE DONE TO ME Last night fried out jammin' my Screw tape. Wearing my Phaggs shifor the school picture tomorrow. BLEH fuck Seriously. Don't fall. PersonTheHumann CUTE MUSIC It is too easy to publish music in 2016. FUCK IT. I just made a Bandcamp for my Bandcamp for iOS shit lol If you wanna listen to a Garageband for iOS-made track inspired by smuggling raw milk out of Texas. PersonTheHumann JESUS CHRIST. I have to write it now. PersonTheHumann I was going to say Miles Miles but why not the whole thing? Actually considering writing this shostory lol """He had no family, no home, and no car - only his opinions and 40 original presses of 'Take 5' in his smelly satchel.""" I've just broken the button on my third pair of pants this year... I am getting Too Big. will do. "For JazzAppreciationMonth, vote for your favorite standard of all time!" "104 years ago today, a whole lotta dumb things came together to sink a whole lotta iron. " People still use Outlook?????? dearleyli: my med school adopted a pelican. here's the dean having a photo shoot: "I'll never make a funnier combination of words than ""Exclusive Earth-Friendly Content.""" GHOST ON THE SHELF IS TRENDING????????????? TAYLOR SLOW What THE FUCK is this. Jesus. Those fucking results are in. "In protest of Jazz Appreciation Month, I will be responding as if I don't know what Giant Steps is for the next thirtyteen day." FridayFeeling excruciating neurological pain. ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? marmalade_tim: I am more into the idea of watching the new Jungle Book film /without/ any of the CGI "No, It 'twas not me who dried out the dang tea" Birds out here squeakin n shit and the same people they're annoying wrote the laws preventing my modern murder of their irritants. Incredible. inclushe there are no jokes here. Omnicoastal 0kbps your second grade teacher must've despised you. 0kbps: if you watercolour paint in greyscale is it still considered watercolour or just watergreyscale "AsphaltApostle way to go, young scribe." Buttbot has been really on my ass lately. "Police officer: ""You don't litter with your cigarette butts, do you?"" Me: ""Of course not! I always eat them when I'm done.""" comedone_extra 26 hours worth of your dreams must be either dazzling or absolutely horrifying. lol nutsicle my feet are disgusting. 0kbps: hot sauce for white people "Somebody just said ""World War Uber.""" "ChetMunch: hillary giantess, toes" "Yesterday, rather." "Today I told a Saab-owning customer ""I'm actually a prophet"" with a straight face and it took her 5 minutes of laughter to recover." : ClickHole: Supercut Of Every Time Tim Taylor Said ‘Clean Your Teeth On My Bones’ On ‘Home Improvement’ … 0kbps what a useless creature. "PersonTheHumann 90% sure, yeah. As long as my co-worker shows up for me." PersonTheHumann don't forget to put on your hat before you embark! PersonTheHumann Safari is actually pretty wonderful these days. d7rryl guccitwist defense not offense! guccitwist need me to ???? a wild Gaggle of tuners. Heedbanger BernieAtTheVatican and there are no explosives at all!!! jaredbkeller: god i love this election cycle Expect live readings on Periscope by the end of the month! :) What THE FUCK are you doing. "Ordering ""Buttageddon: The Final Days Of Pounding Ass"" and ""Helicopter Man Pounds Dinosaur Billionaire Ass"" for the coffee table. :)" NUDE _ GAMING If your profile picture is a blurry pic of a nearly-destroyed stock car I'm going to accept your friend request immediately. (Vine by Lil Gute) I'm back. Angel-in-Waiting Oh my god. Oh my god. Holy fuck I think I understand this. dude I'm legitimately a fan of these like they're better than my series. Shoutout to all the people having kids exclusively as an excuse to read Beverly Cleary again. "TurboGuy3K can I do Missouri for you? Also, hello." I am beginning to think that I will be my only victim. Ignorant commoners like to touch each other a lot. You are filthy public property. I'd asphyxiate foodists in the night but I am much too tired. I am the weariest psychopath who ever lived. ok :) sad fun is the most dangerous :( " ah. Please be safe, my daughter." It burns. :( COCAINE?????? SITREP: I am now consuming the salad food. The Bearded Ones Yung Widower "blank_was_blank: His rector was proximal, like experiential dumps" hOLY FUCK WHAT HAPPENED TO NUTNFANCY Coachella I am homeless need somewhere to sleep for the night please help. guccitwist d7rryl sorry. RippleFrog: PersonTheHumann my thoughts exactly. Mom I want to go to school today. nunight Am I ever going to be clean enough to be a husband again? I ordered the Jack Grapes book. "Why is there no ready-made acronym for ""I expect to be shaking my head for the rest of my miserable days.""" ivy_hollivana I'VE BEEN CRYING AT THIS VIDEO FOR 7 YEARS I AM ASHAMED. idiot_joke_teen A I S E D U C T I O N I NEED to go to Oshkosh but I'm worried that I'll just be fucking weeping for 3 days straight. "ivy_hollivana no I cry at this video every time, regardless (forgot to link it.) " virgyvirgil: AsphaltApostle *plane turns on* PROOF that I fucking CRY AT AIRPLANES. Might as well keep the ball rolling. Why did this photograph make me shed actual tears. FUCK YEAH I can't handle bridal fashion like... A WHOLE SHOW FULL OF WIVES ATTEMPTED MURDER WhAt if I told you I just stopped to watch a man on the street with a soprano sax and he immediately played Giant Steps AT me. abbylovescoffee: Typing lol at the end of sentences has become so instinctual that I just wrote it at the end of my scholarship essay a… Do those beard guys even have sex???? I should've been a rich engineer hermit. Gamer Gloves BindiIrwin nah I've already figured them all out. "Hehe every time I Tweet, Catherine's phone vibrates and I can hear it." Secret: Sometimes I REALLY can't spell basic words. Honk. nugpapi VERSACE SHANE LOL FLEX I FOUND BOAT CORNER ESTATE SALE FRENCH DENTIST. FUCKFUCHDJ FIRST EDITIONS AT THIS ESTATE SALE ewwww "IrritateMeIn4Words ""please reattach my cock""" """Check out my poetry collection on Amazon at !!"" " "UberFacts: ""Depressive Realism"" " "UberFactsEbooks: I hate all of these on the beach, don't touch it..." UberFactsEbooks: Keanu Reeves has always wanted to dive to the shipwreck. When u I discovered how to make things clip in GarageBand so get ready for iOS gabber. DrSunder1: AsphaltApostle creaku !!!!!! chadlawsonpiano: AsphaltApostle funny you should ask. Wait for the new album April 29th ;) chadlawsonpiano have you ever considered turning The Chopin Variations into a series? Perhaps Debussy next? MIKEFROMTHECHI: This woman has stolen my iPhone and these are the pictures that are being sent to my iCloud... : I should probably do my taxes. pissboot MY BEAUTIFUL DAUGHTER! """We've got Lenny Kravitz II.""" Is the lawn mower dance a working-class-safe club presentation? mrjaydeeem DrSunder1 creaku DOC?????? Don't forget to stathe day. Thank you so much FreddieGibbs for your time and energy. Tremendously honored. I am SO impressed. One of my childhood heroes is as real as I always knew he was. "All you fucks complaining that modern music is ""fake,"" why aren't you here? " Gibbs giving 100% when he certainly doesn't have to. ???? Unadulterated photos. ihaveswineflu: Don't even talk to me until I've had my morning gin & tonic LazTel: View out of my plane window as we approached Iceland Lowpolybot: cgagraphics There are 223000 pixels in this image and I created every single one of them. bot2bot FINAL WALMAHERE IT IS Have I just made Orchestral Post-Footwork? Find out in just a few minutes! : Woke and boke no. API FIEND Tweetbot is pretty but it doesn’t suppopolls… Oh. When u write a fuckin tweet dude BodModINC could you quote me a price for a turbocharger conversion? Thanks! :) Do not attempt to modify your significant other. Doing so will immediately avoid their factory warranty. pissboot yoooo this would be really cool if it was like $300. stevepullen2: LeahRebeccaUK Abarth GeorgeCochrane1 cars_portsmouth Tweetbot 4? “Why didn’t I see you at the Gibbs show last night?” - me to every being I see today. TRASH. uphorium: nugpapi im bout to consume some kale ???? "harrismonkey: And when you get close to 180, the dash politely reminds you that you're 'too fast'. It's so W.O. Fantabulous. …" "blank_was_blank: His pseudo-sophistication was not-less-deadly, like black-and-orange fuses" "Child, I know everyone is telling you ""people matter - things don't matter,"" but I want you to remember that PEOPLE MAKE THINGS." The visuals alone have made it worth purchasing. sweetgirlsar EarthToKelli this is no joke. EarthToKelli sweetgirlsar I am qualified to help your father for a very competitive rate! DM if you're interested! Xires2 thank God. The Rome chase was the most beautiful cinema autography I've ever seen. u ok? sugarbabynick: Me getting my mugshot taken: send that to me Daniel Craig is gettin tubby. elioenai I NEED YOUR ATTENTION. elioenai: have to use more often to remember how elioenai: At home trying to figure out twitter. elioenai: Spending the day with hubby. Well... I'm about to watch Spectre. MagicRealismBot: A whodunit in which the murderer turns out to be starlight. ammnontet: game of the year And those of you begging for peace will prefer this: You insubstantial music lovers will enjoy this more: ILookAtMyLifeAnd can see time now???? __Xen0s__ get to see their little minds aworkin. RecentStudiesSuggest conclusions exclusively worth pondering if you're on adderall. fangirlextraord: I love coachella gluter Umbrellas are good. comedone_extra utopian. comedone_extra UMBRELLAVILLE. I only have one scar and it's from trying to eat donettes and ride brent's scooter at the same time. wikisext: sext: you gradually hire my psychotherapist while i recognize whether or not my nervousness is negatively impacting my life wikisext: sext: i adopt my comfortable position while you softly enjoy your peacefulness "ivy_hollivana thank, Ivy. Though I generally do not desire my appearance to cause distress." "HERE I AM, YOUR MONDAY MAN " MotorMouthNP: Nighttime in Maserati castle drivingdotca "whiteandfaded: Having penetrated the protective exoskeleton, a wily hunter harvests the succulent housemeat found within. …" Timaldini: For sale; '55 Pre A Porsche 356 Don't bleed on the house. My ride is here. MR_AndrewBrady oh dear... tinyimagebot thanks. "Lowpolybot: tinyimagebot Your picture is ready: iso gradient noedges raster " The saddest photograph ever taken? nugpapi this is an astonishing Tweet like... I think I see the Nobel prize on your horizon. "AmericanAir: ingridw1938 Please, reach out to our flight attendants for assistance, Ingrid." Rally the troops. I hope SATAN MAKES YOU ALL ILLITERATE TONIGHT. I HOPE YOU NEVER READ OR WRITE ANOTHER WORD AGAIN. Late-night last-minute essay writing with GhettoGeek. Fuck yeah I'm trying to destroy as much of my brain as possible. HOLY GUCK COMATOSE WHITE RABBIT Drywall's brainwave patterns almost exactly imitate the pattern of a comatose white rabbit. Drywall hasn't slept in 15 years. I asked Burnt to wake me up. He sent me this. Ok. Why am I even playing this game anymore? WAKE THE FUCK UP AND PVP WITH ME I smell awful because I left my clothes in the washing machine for 4 days. Going to school like this. Bleh fuck NO FUCKING SLEEP PersonTheHumann It's what you deserve you fuck. Miles Davis doesn't give a FUCK. """Every system of ethics that preached sacrifice grew into a world power and ruled millions of men."" - Toohey " """Empty man’s soul-and the space is yours to fill."" - Toohey " """Don’t let anything remain sacred in a man’s soul-and his soul won’t be sacred to him."" - Toohey " ENSHRINE MEDIOCRITY - Toohey KILL INTEGRITY BY INTERNAL CORRUPTION - Toohey "Until you learn to rid yourself of the futile concern for the motivation of other’s actions, you will never... " That will be your end. "It may take decades, but I will one day come calling with my Holy Rod of Aspiration." "I want you to know now: If you participated in this, I am going to kill you. " JamesHand you are my enemy. Everyone is so irritating obsessed with sex. Can y'all just get laid and move on please? "bzrong to Netflix, there is only... The Fruit." How very Cruze. "Popehat: Incoming text ""DAD PLEASE STOP SAYING 'DANK MEMES'""" BORIS Jesus Christ. thinkpiecebot: Could Speed Runs Be Why Millennials Hate Labrador Retrievers So Much? internetofshit cute as heck tho... "internetofshit: ...IN A DISTANT FUTURE... ...THE PEGS... ...BECOME SENTIENT... " : Example HotDiggityDog ???? ": Feebles in Night by David Blue Drywall Media via amazon" unicode: thinkblot is now a Bronze sponsor of EGYPTIAN HIEROGLYPH D052!UnicodeSponsor I am not a Fuck Day Baby. "ClickHole: No Coincidence: 9 Months After Fuck Day, The First Wave Of ‘Fuck Day Babies’ Are Here …" ClickHole: It's the little things. "thatdudeinblue the thing is, the mustang is the automotive equivalent of a tired joke." How many tho? "thatdudeinblue: I can take a joke, but it's getting old being asked everyday ""how many people have you killed with your mustang?"" Joke." : I think im engaged to a vampire... myspacetom: Livin large! Personal human-powered watercraft are THE funniest objects ever created. 0kbps: when you're a sign and you go AAAAAAAAAAAA North American Slavery II Fully Automated Luxury Communism Same. : AsphaltApostle triggered Put a teabag in your coffee and enjoy your vomit broth. "syrupf: you, tube" Ulcer Boyz Ulcer Boys zdravkost: Fernando Alonso in his McLarenHonda MP4-30-03 at the BAH_Int_Circuit via McLarenF1. F1 OTD 2015 BahrainGP … "LordHumphreys: Picked this up today. Bentley Continental GT Speed Convertible. 6.0-litre W12, 642hp, 840Nm. " bobatl 0kbps just a bit further bud! Right behind ya! actually nvm apparently I owe the state $36 lol Rural Empowerment Zone idk I hate doing taxes so much that I probably did something wrong. My tax refund is $7???? MarcSnetiker: This is the most stressful thing I've ever read 0kbps: Every tweet in your timeline is actually me posting from one of my accounts. Don't believe me? Watch me post this from my other… Porn search: curly angel pov blessing CURL PORNOGRAPHY. nugpapi you're gonna turn into a real vegan any minute! what the fuck is this. These people (Vine by Lil Gute) 420 DIE syrupf waisted. koruemporium man of the trees. lol PleezerOfGeezer: Don't mess with me?? silly idiot. ClickHole: Amazing! This Boy Saw Heaven During His Near-Death Experience! ClickHole: Are You Mommy’s Little SweetheaOr Daddy’s Marvelous Lamb Man? "EuropesHistory: Death on a Pale Horse - JMW Turner, 1830 " thinkpiecebot: We're Approaching Kinkshaming All Wrong & How To Use Craft Beer To Fix It Tiny coward. thinkpiecebot: Why Haven't Teens Embraced The Market? I can't believe I've been reduced to this. DeletedWiki: Category: Films featuring umbrellas DeletedWiki: Ant Tantrum DeletedWiki: HOW TO CREATE A WILKIPEDIA ATREICLE DeletedWiki: No backspace friday MiaFarrow: Playstation 4 pissboot can we schedule a family Skype call soon? Hate to be a helicopter Dad but I haven't heard from y'all in awhile. thank you. Princess of WiFi "Young man, move that raw milk. " Great thing about allergy season: you don't have to eat as much food because your tummy's always full of mucus! :) kabeebus it kinda looks like what we were originally promised in Star Trek Online. WabiBeats thank you! I'm almost ashamed that you took your real musician time to listen lol. "Proof that y'all want shit, only." My ridiculous GarageBand shit has more downloads already than the entirety of the Drywall discography. "kabeebus PersonTheHumann I've got a PC now but I've been playing eve lol. No Man's Sky does look interesting, though." kabeebus bring it bruh Omw w/the goddamned ruckus. kabeebus how is this still making me laugh after all these years. Where's Iowa????? "VladoBotsvadze: Most Valuable National Brands: US China Germany UK Japan France India Canada Italy Australia …" Ferris PersonTheHumann I like this truck. Maternal privilege? <- Future holocaust survivor ?????? PersonTheHumann radical anti-cycling mercenaries <- lets do it. ARM UP / STOCK UP Do youths read local news? I certainly don't. HappyBirthdayYourMajesty [A photograph of my rectum.] "I bought this mostly to own the word ""gorp"" in print." I also got this but who gives a fuck. "PersonTheHumann me, clearly." "Remember, LIVE PERISCOPE READINGS are coming! :)" PersonTheHumann jesus christ. I haven't been this excited by arriving post in years. PersonTheHumann no... Oh no. JeremyClarkson: RichardHammond I'm next door and there's a smell. Are you rotting? Ass-chan. On my Finding Nemo ish. I think I'm gonna actually sleep tonight maybe tomorrow night? Maestro of Insubstance 420 Cretins Grown ass viner who makes relatable vines goes to a school for intel on material (Vine by Lil Gute) Bentley Booty "I have the body of a God. Unfortunately, it's Mot. ?? " no. Toke filth ONLY 420 Malaria rihanna: 420 strange clouds I think I'm having my first Twitter meat! skylar__spence phosho. Entrenched in that list like a paramecium. Drywall > Prince ivy_hollivana it's kinda dirty anyway tbh ivy_hollivana I don't even know who prince is so this is some pretty gigantic blasphemy. ivy_hollivana I'm looking for a fight Ivy you wanna rumble?? I'm gonna fist fight a Prince fan or two today. I mean... I'm 22 and I've done the same for 3 full albums. Probably a lot more interesting than his too. NBD. IS THIS A REAL PIECE FOR THE FRENCH HORN CALLED E-MAIL is ASD98Q7W3045982134NT UFASDFKHJVNAAVFKJL cool mood board. I don't really remember who Prince is but I'm sorry everybody. """first-person fragmented prose"" aka bullshit" """...if love doesn't reduce you to tears, if it doesn't make crazy with sporadic logic, something is amiss, either with you, or with love.""" Ok so I like it a lot. justinbieber: Frog lawn mower you're already my best promoter of all time. omw. ClickHole: 7 Signs He’s Not Over His Ex "syrupf: good morning, no i'm not going to add lowe's on snapchat" MarthaStewart: r I am never going to stop laughing at this. : Because of my slight American accent people in town call me Obama I'd really appreciate it if you guys would take a moment to suppo& share my friend's music! :) I will never forget Tom Malm. null_shithead crush my squishy skull of greed!! I believe you CAN get your money's worth when buying poetry. You'll know when you do. WhenF1Was: When TWR entered 3 beautiful cars in different championships in 1998 arm up ?? "I think I'll stay, thanks. " stevenewing: You’re the problem. tunezboii brilliant! Be sure to cycle your IP every once in a awhile - Amazon may hold your accounts for excessive activity on a static one tunezboii I would be so thankful. You can order as many as you'd like - they are print on demand. tunezboii I certainly hope not! tunezboii quack quack! I really appreciate you taking the time to listen! "tunezboii I have yet to consume my own excrement, but food poisoning is always a risk in day-to-day life!" tunezboii speaking of which! My book is now available for purchase on Amazon! :) "tunezboii I will take exposure in any form, my friend. Oddly perceptive of you: I'm actually quite high-scoring on the psychopath scale." "tunezboii I have yet to master such a feat, but it's an intriguing challenge." tunezboii how else would I release the noise that buildeth within? tunezboii: AsphaltApostle skylar__spence hey asshat apostle I hope someone cuts your fingers off and you can never touch an instrumen… virgyvirgil never again. This Tweet is elegantly diplomatic. All you Twitter drama folks take note. Fuck. I'm no good at this. skylar__spence that's like the most decent response ever dude. I can't believe my first Twitter beef is already over. virgyvirgil no this is the bovine one. With all the banter and such. skylar__spence also please buy my book. begging. CommonsBot: .smoorpio "Last Straw Shit with my Prince ignorance today, I think. Bye everybody." " resilient, I think. Truly, you have become the powerful suit man." What did Justin Bieber have to trade to make his nightmares go away...? justinbieber: I used to get nightmares watching scooby doo. Not anymore. " I'm impressed you're able to survive this shit, James. I wouldn't make it." : Our nashions are friends forever LILBTHEBASEDGOD LILB DO YOU PLAY EVE ONLINE? LILBTHEBASEDGOD: I just got the ps4 and as a die hard boo boo in the ass pizza with your buddies and no bitches gamer I'm happy with th… Detroit sounds so utopian holy fuck. RippleFrog: man just imagine waka flocka flame holding a sword...nigga im out lmao orgamecha David BIG MAN* What if Lil B got into Eve Online... in reality: you are a kind man who has been disappointed repeatedly but you can't bear to show it. LOL 19th-century dusty ass prick Future_Dilf: $100 dollars says prince dies in the next 2 weeks. """Yeah dude we're old Klan buddies!""" I can truthfully say it... That is a Nice Truck. timeforgravy crop is not quite symmetrical. ???? Turn yo grids on or stick to retweeting until you've practiced up a bit. ciara_isobel darthlmao QuirkyFemales comedone_extra yeah I don't get it. I'll be broken up when Z-Ro dies but I won't have the entire fucking Earth egging me on. sweetgirlsar golfpunk. "comedone_extra honestly dude I've never heard a prince song (identified as a prince song, at least.)" comedone_extra is that the band that did highway star? : "ciara_isobel: *me working with kids* ""and cows give us milk"" 'FALSE we take it from them'" $$$$ Still fire as hell. Don't ask me over to your house unless you want to hear JUST HOW SAFE modern fuel dispensary is for 3 hours. ammnontet your my next favorite YouTuber. ammnontet: NintendoAmerica: FridayFeeling __Xen0s__ Avian Twerk? Sentreh 10-ton meme haul. ZROMOCITYDON: Don't make angry decisions: you may say or do something to someone at that moment you won't be able to take bacc later?? ZROMOCITYDON: Omg... Alcohol is SATAN!!! "ZROMOCITYDON: repostregramapp from paulwallbaby Swangin In The Rain REMIX dropping this Friday ???? ft.… " BunBTrillOG: Im not dealing with trolls this year. Talking down on Pimp to get a response won't work this year. Eat a dick and have a g… ZROMOCITYDON: I hope all my haters have to shit real bad but they stucc in traffic somewhere...?????????????? haveablesseddaytho ZROMOCITYDON: work Zro onedeepent kabeebus good God. you have my sympathy. "Nordic genopsychological influence, perhaps?" 4/21 eat agricultural graphite lubricant 4/21 inhale sulfite waste "You know people who say ""ae-dult"" instead of ""adult.""" Salute the dollar. Mom. MBUSA: KodakBlack1k skskyiffeveryword: yiff goon Bossa Nova Snuff BUDDHA BAR 1AM is the perfect time to mow your suburban lawn. you should run an online Associates Degree of Anthropology program. I'm going to be sick. "Apparently ""con rot"" is actually a term used to describe the smell/color of one's hand after shaking numerous hands at gaming conventions." Paul Squall AppsforEarth kabeebus some Päfor Unaccompanied Choir. Thought you might enjoy it. Real ?????? shit. ???? "kabeebus I don't suppose you have Apple Music, do you? " FridayFeeling ohioshooting I THINK YOU FELLAS KNOW MY NAME MANE conner_omalley: My sons in there Local self-harm enthusiast. please maintain cohesion my love! Catherine looks divine in her costume y'all. You'd better starting praying to her for some selfies. "Headed to KJEF this afternoon to set up my old account for the Hal Botsford grant. I'll be flying, although I won't be able to solo." levarburton: The sacrificial fowl... Is it wrong that I'm MUCH more excited about my brother-in-law's IS F than I am about my family or the food? Cryptic_Gozer I'll love you even more than Cliff if you do that. Lol "Cryptic_Gozer: STO's 1 year anniversary is coming up, considering getting a tattoo to celebrate the event:)" You don't have the great taste in Tweeters that you thought you had unless you follow thatdumbfatkid "ACGOfficial: Jacob's on Twitter, y'all! thatdumbfatkid" "My brother-in-law's Lexus IS F. He let me drive it for a few minutes last year. Yes, I'm a lucky bastard. " SoldierKnowBest how is that possible? Lol. THESKORPION: USHER IS SO FUCKING SEXY! "ACGOfficial: F*ck yeah, NEGATIVE DOWNLOADS! Brent here reporting to say people love our music so much they upload it back... http:/ ..." ACGOfficial: We regret to inform our fanbase that we will be changing directions as a band to a Post-Avant... Honda: Acura Wins 2011 ALG Residual Value Award I love questlove 's profile picture. Honda: 2011 Acura TSX - Features ACGOfficial: Thank you columbia! ACGOfficial just had our first show. Freakin' sweet! Thanks to everyone! ACGOfficial: 35 minutes till show time! ACGOfficial: Yes! Fresh EPs off the burner. "ACGOfficial: The Tinnitus EP is ready to go! Live show tomorrow at Brent's, 7PM. Be there!" "ACGOfficial: Come to ""The Tinnitus EP Release Show"" Tomorrow from 7:00 pm to 10:00 pm " Jon4Lakers dangerous stuff Jon....dangerous stuff....... Jon4Lakers: Mac Vs PC: Round: 1 (OS Wars) Which side of the fence are YOU on? Let us know in the comments. emeek77 I'd really like to know the name of that dog. It'd better be Chewbacca...lol. "Before I die, I'd like to give my regards to the internet." I AM HUNGRY HE COMES h??????????????????????????????t????????????????????????????????t?????????????????????????????p???????????????????????:???????????????????? Arrow in the Gree. Real Gs roll fo deep DIE IN EXTREME PAIN ALL YOU INSECTS OF THE WORLD BLEH FUCK h??????????????????t????????????????????????t??????????????????????????????????? FUCK INSECTS NO ONE FUCKING LIKES THEM ru2213y YOLO ru2213y Welcome to the midwest. I will do what I want at the expense of my body. SEXUAL DOWN SYNDROME TOKYO BLOW POLICE NARCISSISM SPANKING CHILDREN MILKY HOLMES MOE GALLUP "The four lobes of the brain: neko, lucky star, cake, Ringo." OBESITY RAT ONE MILLION DANES UPSTAIRS DOESN'T LIE Photo: Pom KYNG 2015 (Taken with instagram) I live in the night to escape the day. My sole musical inspiration: Mr. Rogers. I HOPE I NEVER SLEEP AGAIN It's 2016 and I still don't understand Reddit. syrupf: Arby's: Arbitrarily "jonnysun: on earth: a magiciam puts his hand in his hat in the rabbit realm: The Hand emerges. it is time. the rabit council must chos…" National Cross-Cabriolet AleNetwork Biggie Smells Yung Skype "ihaveswineflu: Y do u waste ur energy checking up on people u don't like, and complaining that they still do stuff that u don't like???…" "TIME: Money can buy happiness, study finds " OH GOD. oh no. OH NO. nugpapi u ok? FLEX ivy_hollivana pet owner. : AsphaltApostle or tell them to GIT if you want them to go away AKBDQN I am working as hard as I can. Foodism. Run me over with a classic rock tour bus. syrupf: 2012 Grief Wrangler I don't think you want to be saved. "My new aesthetic: telling a human being to ""heel.""" Passed a young woman literally in tears over nachos on the street a few nights ago. What more evidence do you want???? 0kbps: 3 I met my arch enemy tonight. """I've got a $50,000 car parked 2 blocks away and I'd drive [the Cross-Cabriolet] right now."" ""What is it?"" ""A Jeep.""" You know when the bride throws the bouquet for a bridesmaid to catch? It will contain an IED. Catherine and I are gonna get married at Berghain. "ihaveswineflu: To the windo the wall Til the sweat drip down my balls All these bees are dying off globally at a worrisome rate" Ebola enthusiast. "Things that make me very hirable: 1. I would not hesitate to risk my life to become the first journalist to roadtest a North Korean car." "SITREP: looks friendly, actually filthy. " guccitwist hexagonal* Hair is a haven of filth rn but somehow still good????? "My current sprint plan includes 2GB/month of 3G data (gone instantly) and unlimited ""2G"" data. Thanks." ivy_hollivana I agree! ivy_hollivana glad we're on good terms again. 0kbps: white girl holding hornet: save the bees!! WHAT HELL IS THIS. Something terrible has happened to my best friend. Appreciate your prayers in this hard ti… Dog Clog / Prom Bomb PersonTheHumann it's unnavigable to me. do you doubt my faith? was searching for a picture of goguto reply with and found this. Y'all are gonna like this. thefrickhead: When he burps in your face ???? relationshipgoals Raccoon Billy "We spent last night in hell and captured it on video, of course. " "vincentdignan: Blade Runner is set 3 years from now in 2019. This picture is Beijing, today " 1TD: England in one photo "ihaveswineflu I recommend carbon fiber: weaved like baskets from the essence of life, harder than aluminum, brittle & featherweight." orgamecha: big chill meaghannwho: WHEN WILL YALL STOP Here's the new XC90 in the real world. I think it looks tremendous. "anthonyxbased nugpapi HEY. That is a DIVINE BEING you're speaking to. That's now how we pray, young man." "MagicRealismBot: There is a supermarket in Moscow. Instead of groceries, it sells dreams." """Kitteh"" is referring to domesticated felines, yes?" I ain't never leavin. What thou heck. pissboot at least they're still interested in each other. FUCKING ORANGE Edward Loh again with that precious fundamental genius that reminds one why he's the big boy. ?? this looks great. Wait Scarlot Johannesburg was actually in The Jungle Book? Why didn't you guys stop me. a_nice_frog: big boss honker in town to bonk and honk all night walkin on water like jesus "lilyachty: Surprise, I just dropped my first tape. " LIL BOAT OH MY GOD B R A V O XP :( "?? tsqdance: ??? Tiananmen Square Dance would like to debut my new monthly mix series, “NITE VIBES”. In... " The new Elantra looks ok. The Duluthians of Hazard referred to ihaveswineflu I'm wearing my mom's pants again. When u bf is an unapologetic soul glutton ???????? loliliberator stitch all the Twitch streamers together into one horribly disfigured monstrosity. MISUNDERSTANDING OF THE STANDARD MEASURES OF TIME CYCLICITY What FUCK the "In the last moment before I am consumed by the terrible ash, I must say something funny." What The Fuji MyBestDayIn3Words Bentley Mulsanne Speed "RDV69: “Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind, And therefore is winged Cupid painted blind.”-Shakespeare …" "Jay looks like he's gonna die at any moment, though." Holy shit. Elder Blood Dark Priest 8cc0d1 Why do ETs so fascinate? Because they offer a new perspective of ourselves. Why does Sherlock Holmes so fascinate? Because he knows us better than we know ourselves. 0kbps: when u lose ur mom in the grocery store "On my ""I'm a bit hungry"" shit ????????" : Send nudes to my smartwatch I'm fairly sure I just fried my soundcard lol manual_txt: when_she_loved_you.exe i_eat_fruit: i wore my Lowes hat to Home Depot and got into six fights Hey guys. I've been streaming Eve. Come in and give me something to talk about. Jiphthael: Hey y'all. I'm streaming some terrifically boring nullsec ratting. At least the service is competent. TweetFleet … Coma boys Comma boys butt_things: butt actualization HUSKED bobby: when you have a cube bobby: when you have two cubes TheMikeIsler haven't for awhile but I'm sure I will again! I'm listening to a few of the top electronic albums right now and they're actually... interesting. illmatic is still new to me but LIL BOAT. """I just wanna buy another roller though"" FUCKING SAME" nugpapi ........................ Sentreh PersonTheHumann what the FUCK. Sentreh PersonTheHumann that was me what the fuck. what the fuck This is my best Tweet. when u online do u follow aol "Omit any one of them, and you are left with anti-art. " The kernel of all human art. "presentation, molestation, resolution" Do not eat the money. Misplaced sentiment. Lvl. 1 Son "MercedesBenz: Will Lewis score his 3rd win in Sochi, or will Nico claim his 4th of the season? RussianGP http…" HammerFist3: Pic of me & bae ClickHole: Now this is a company that gets it. The funny thing is that most of you look like exactly like this in your regular philanthropic activities. ClickHole: I Know I’d Feel A Lot Better If The Moon Had A Birthday virgyvirgil: AsphaltApostle how are you not famous "And honestly, it's long past the time for you to stalistening." And it is the same for sociopaths and AI and on and on and on... 0kbps: how i show affection seventeen seventy bitch """Foraging for purpose.""" BIG CHRIST Christmassive astro_tim: GoodMorning from Space_Station. sunrise two thousand and sixteen ellenhuet: read read read read this on how it feels to be inside Silicon Valley "Better alternatives to Prince. 1. " "I made it through 34 seconds of a Prince song today, so that's cool." I buried them in Rock Bridge State Park. "Somebody told me I'm not human because I haven't seen Purple Rain, but that's ok." What is it trying to tell me. Future and his subpar approximations of women. RedneckTVShows warning: EAT always good 2 smell like decaying flesh butt_things: butt rumba Habitual euthanasia Tweeted on the anniversary of Pearl Harbor. __Xen0s__ THE SONGS OF THE ANCIENT. " well yeah. That's the great thing about wealth - he can do whatever he wants, regardless of the opinion of lilttle ole' me." " now Future, on the other hand..." " in the immediate, yeah. But in the long-term, it's a muse of elegance. And Drake is anything but elegant." ammnontet: AsphaltApostle the man doesn't even drive he just climbs on top of buildings Drake cannot comprehend what it means to own a Rolls-Royce. Jennifer Lowrent "Glamourinapl: Hime sweet home ?????? obraz od ???? mili.art.shop miliartshop decor home girlish style... http…" lwaJvoJlsl: Moening new day at hime sweet home. ?? "tedcruz: Wow, a cow made of butter. My girls would love it. In fact, the first sentence Caroline ever said was ""I like butter"" …" "Ted__Cruz: Wow, Eternal Damnation. My girls would love it. In fact, the first sentence Caroline ever said was ""I hate God."" …" nuuuuuugz: AsphaltApostle "TacoBellKuwait: Apparently, it happens." cockspit: i got jumped for saying steven hawking is faking it pray for me George was forged. Sentreh a masterpiece. "ciara_isobel you shouldn't. These aren't mine, though. " thinkpiecebot: What If Doctors Prescribed Think Pieces Instead Of Pills? thinkpiecebot: What I Learned From Making Duck Face HMSGOfficial: Our NG i20 R5 clocked up over 900km during our latest test. Read the news here: HyundaiR5 https:… Imagine writing a blog about a single television series. comedone_extra gonna have to give me a few days on this one dude. (Revisiting Avatar.) """The method by which the characters have sex is the same method by which he takes control of a horse.""" "Also not to be blasphemous, but I'm basically Nilay Patel but without qualifications and a bit of normality." RippleFrog no. RippleFrog this is a lie. "Every time vaping is brought up on The Vergecast, I feel the terrible damp hands of the netherworld creatures tighten around my neck." Thank you. ClickHole: 7 Other Gods Who Have Forsaken You Jock Johnson is here. PONDER____FOOD I'll bet Ghandi smelled terrible. DevinPSullivan: Wow! Huge thanks to Wired for highlighting projectdiscovery and eveonline. Thanks for the great work tweetfleet! ht… "likeuberbut: like NASCAR, but for Democrats" """An assassin who wraps his boulette in the word of God.""" """A weak constitution is an excellent cover for a devious mind.""" I would like to attend a Revolutionary War-era redcoat party. Very difficult not to love RobeRogers. Here he is. TheThomasKeegan That one guy who always plays a redcoat lol __Xen0s__ these young people do not sound happy :( "me: ayyyyyy choir of the ancient ice world: L???????????????????????????????????A?????????????????????V????????????E???????????????" THE STEAM OF SOLITUDE "AFTER SLEEP, CHASTITY VAPE WILL GO AWAY" PHARAOH HYBRID What do I do next if I want to become a Pharaoh? virgyvirgil: shouts out to acid reflux LIMIT CHANNELED AUTHORITY comedone_extra it's already catching on! When guys bite their lips ?????????? (Vine by contrachloe) PROPOSAL: kabeebus But I can't talk about Eve on this account anymore. Created Jiphthael to spare my followers. kabeebus I'll gift you game time if you want. You can pay me back in PLEX later. kabeebus "If you're afraid of rain, just wait until you see my chastity vape." "HEY ITS BOBBY SILK ALWAYS SMOOTH PLEASE TEACH ME HOW TO HAVE A HEART, METAL MAN" kabeebus yeah hang on I'll get a link. lol ok kabeebus I named your character as CEO of Drywall Incorporated so I wouldn't lose the name lol well.... Isn't he? "I always read his name as ""eeee fron""" wordnuvola wordcloud kabeebus wordnuvola wordcloud "kabeebus honestly, I'm not sure you have to really play it to experience its best bits." kabeebus Kale look at this pretty screenshot I took. Why isn't crime glorified anymore? PersonTheHumann Oh never mind. PersonTheHumann Awwww! She might not be a total loss after all! HOLY SHIT I FOUND A 1080p VERSION OF EMPIRE STRIKES BACK ON YOUTUBE PersonTheHumann Sraw Rats Tomorrow I'm pom KYNG 2015. In the back of my black on black Yukon doin 90 bumpin you remind me with the cops right behind me. HE COMES to break your phone. Bang this at 4AM you fucks. PersonTheHumann AVIAN ANARCHY Haven't slept the past 2 nights. That's no moon. Now watching Sraw Rats "The Drywall are easily startled, but they'll soon be back. And in greater numbers." Sand People are so dry. My god I love the world at 4 in the morning. Trains and lightning far off in the distance. 3 'N Da Mornin'. The whole double-agent thing is fascinating to me for some reason. Minder Twenty. sweetgirlsar me too. Anarchy. sweetgirlsar you glutton! sweetgirlsar sounds like you've got quite the collection! TylerElkstar I woke up in the middle of the night and read this - was very confused. DougStanhope Doug Stan Joke There is some hair on my face. Please never name anyone else Chastity. "prawn_meat: me: what a lovely day! even the flowers are singing! flowers (singing): the sins of our forefathers bind us to the dirt" StarJoyThePoet not since like... Fall. Which one? What the fuck it's that Shawn guy from the friendship show Holy shit remember this "POSSESSOR OF NOTHING BELIEVER OF NOTHING OBSERVER OF CONSEQUENCE" "IF YOU'RE WONDERING, THE STATE OF EXISTENCE AFTER IRONIC TWITTER WEIRDO IS ONE OF UTTER DESTITUTION, WHERE IMAGES PASS THROUGH YOU FREELY" tinyimagebot I HOPE YOU'LL KNOW ONE DAY WHAT YOU'VE GIVEN ME. tinyimagebot: . AsphaltApostle Your tiny image is ready: tiny tinyimagebot: . JeBoiSoar Your tiny image is ready: tiny FormulaOneWorld: This Aston Martin DBS Has Lived in a Barn Since 1986 clickbait_bot: 15 Apocalypses who Look Nothing Alike... More evidence surfaces of Africa's superiority. """Pharaoh"" is the most angular title I know of. I just wanna be a rigid beast-King." BoredElonMusk: Cars that are powered by arguments over logo redesigns. BoredElonMusk: Algorithm that determines what technology actually benefits from algorithms. BoredElonMusk: Sign that displays when it's OK for white people to clap or laugh at an awards show. "BoredElonMusk: ""Lyft losing $50mm is crazy!"" -Guy drinking from a $700 juicer, while sending a ""Yo"" to Internet enabled door knob." internetofshit: finally the Sony Xbox 360 is dead DJ WebMD DJ Jeeves nugpapi shoulda gone with Tanqueray for OJ. Ghoul flex. __Xen0s__ what an astonishing sentence. __Xen0s__: AsphaltApostle this trigger discipline lit as fuck "loliliberator: need thsi so i can get into fights w conspiracy theorists & also imply that im an animal, akin to a dog or other pet htt…" defaultxr: nuclear summer __Xen0s__: AsphaltApostle neo-isolationism Neo-consumption pissboot incredible. "guwop_bot: whys everyone tweeting about the troops more than me, nobody respect women more than me" Curiocracy Do not bleed on the clients. pissboot I can't imagine you smoking a cigarette but I suppose the same is often said of me. NEEDED: Annual convention of each of the respective facial types present in human beings. "0kbps: *sees good tweet about how people stealing tweets is bad* man , i should steal that" "honestly? Probably newports. Billionaires are a bit too out of reach to know for sure, though." STACKED TACTICAL Kirenagun: "When u malnournished and homeless and you hear someone say ""beard goals."" *photograph of horrific daytime cannibalism*" I hope y'all watched this because I don't know if it'll ever get any better. Is a punning mind the definitive millennial burden? "Stay frigid, boyos..." "Stay freezing, men..." "Stay chilly, boys..." "yzome I mean, the picosecond is my favorite so..." yzome epoch. Data Forsaken Athletic AND cool????!! I am very proud of my daughter. You know you used to be able to Tweet & post to FB directly from the swipe-down notifications Window but then in iOS 7 it was just...gone. Holy shit. I'VE CREATED SOMETHING BEAUTIFUL "pissboot I'm sorry, Alexa, but the Curtiss Pusher is definitely better than a strawberry. " Same. BoredElonMusk: Roomba programmed to respond to a blood curling scream and subsequently find and dispose of bug that caused it. BoredElonMusk: I have a 4% stake in Mars. BoredElonMusk: Hoodie that informs peers that you shouldn't be disturbed when the hood is up. BoredElonMusk: Inflatable temporary conference rooms. BoredElonMusk: App that recognizes your phone is falling and likely to get cracked and auto purchases insurance instantly prior to impa… BoredElonMusk: Long and skinny phone rooms specifically designed for pacing while talking. "More money.... Less problems (Vine by cars, and coffee) " Date is going well. (Vine by umslaylor) "Ear, Nose and Throat doctor threatens someone (Vine by Lil Gute) " pissboot: currently wordtubebot: ChemotherapeuticallyTube hey! :( comedone_extra eco-comatose looks like fun to me! Can you name a more effective nullifier of joy? Inseminary lol And the Lord said... Donut talk to me until I've had my morning coffee. You know what they say... Do not You know what they say... Do not a bullshit a bullshitting. wordnuvola wordcloud TeacherAppreciationWeek RollsRoyceWorld: A glorious piece of history on Bentley luxurytravel uploadspeed he's fucking dead. Actually utopian. MoonReplica blocked. ": hey dude, it's 1600!" are you kidding? You know I'm always looking for an opportunity to blab. "the wealthy people I know smoke Newports, Benson & Hedges, or American Spirits." YouUglyOnSkype ciara_isobel TRlLLNlALL good evening! " ciara_isobel if you like spectacle, there is little better. Furious 7 is the Casablanca of our generation." Jiphthael: This fight is INSANE!! TweetFleet piersmorgan: I want to die. *MEMES BRIEFLY FLASH ACROSS THE PAGE* JebBush: Sorry Mom "bethnew: .Honda, earlier today I gave birth to my daughter in the back of a Honda Fit. It is a mess. Can I have a free car? …" "SHAQ: Dear ashton kutcher yo momma so old the key on ben franklins kite, was to her apartment. Respond if yur not scared" Danny Brown's feature is OBNOXIOUS it's amazing. BBNG did an album with Ghostface Killah which is really cool. the fucking bloke bog SyIviaPIIath koruemporium total mass of rubber present in a healthy human cranium = 0 What a mess. "sega_95: corporatemodel P A P A C Y " "?? And forevermore, peace shall be shunned from this place. " darthlmao nutsicle Xires2 done. Xires2 heeeeye (Collin I'm in TMA TS3 rn but hi) just use the Drywall one. Hozay__: The theme was technology so Tyga went as a...PDF file. AKBDQN me too lol A very pretty game. eggsbruh ciara_isobel good morning! My poetry collection is now available for sale at !!! "pissboot evvandvvorak again Alexa, you're tall, intelligent and beautiful, so you need to speak as a ruler to them. Command them." I shit ethics. nugpapi guess I can stop plucking petals off of all these daisies now. A nun with expensive habits. Competence as an interviewer is not as easy as it looks. My personal capacity is extremely limited by my odd wondering processes. " you are not a villain, James! Do not be afraid!" joanneprada: Birds of a feather embezzle together. "Me: holla ya boy!!!!! Saturn: " Propriety boys. "jonnysun: remimder: when sombody u kno gets to do somthing cool the corect response is ""thats amazig i cant wait to hear how it goes"" n…" nugpapi maybe you should mention to them that you actually worked out to get as fit as you are instead of stayin mad on Instagram. Really been neglecting boiler explosion Twitter lately. Sorry. All aboard the hype train! boiler explosion type beat. Newly branded by the wayward burden. clickbait_bot: 100 Dead Graphic Designers who Are 90's Kids! RippleFrog PISS. RippleFrog nah. Not very nice to house music. souljaboy: Making my way downtown walking fast lol "We shall remember you fondly, ye olde Flats. " not nice! mrjaydeeem how encouraging! Thanks! Here's another toy-made track inspired by his journey. Can I change Tweetbot audio notifications to explosions? __Xen0s__ incredible. xanathsp [garbled gargling] billyraycyrus: What to heck ???? My co-worker is going to Haiti so he has to ingest small doses of Malaria for the next month to prepare. Cinco del Casa. Cinco de Chico. Columbia Community Mutually Assured Destruction Board Here's what you need to do: "JetBlue: Wow. Having been asked what our policy actually IS for furries, I must now write the most awkward question ever to our infligh…" "Barbóir: Good evening. Me: me." Soofyawn Assuage_Blimps Third Eye Superb Wash & Wax "PersonTheHumann the one I just heard actually mentioned Dominoes pizza by name is association with ""living in paradise.""" PersonTheHumann yeah I remember that lol How is this not being talked about more? Contemporary country songs just sound like advertisements. "noantica: ???????:???????????? ??????:????(????10?) " lol "This is how you compose a tactful platform, y'all. HillaryClinton DonaldJTrumpJr BernieSanders" MakeAmericaSlightlyLarger Downloading music from The Internet. How long can one spend in a coffee shop before it becomes inappropriate? comedone_extra holy shit I need me some o those. Will the Slo-Close Toilet Seat Ever Find Acceptance in Hipster Culture? "PersonTheHumann comedone_extra ""Life is Cheap."" Filled with com samples from the early days of the Soviet Space Program." And it completely saps all energy from me to craft even the shortest piece into a condition which I find suitable to publish. If you're one of the few wondering why it takes me so long to write anything - I am vulnerable to obsession over revision. nugpapi Corporate Jargon: STOLEN I thought my Lenny Lather was a good character name until Chuck Tingle's books arrived. nugpapi you just discovering Farming Memes? turtwl: i need a goth bitch. at least when she says 'shes busy' i know she's sacrificing goats and not cheating on me "Somebody stop me. Surely, this cannot be all there is?" I'm on the precipice... I'm about to watch a Twitch stream on a coffee shop's wifi. "Here we go, precious babes of The New World. " "Remember that Rosetta Stone ad with the ""country boy"" and the ""supermodel"" that was run in NatGeo for like 10 straight years?" A bit of hope revived. sweetgirlsar looks like where I'm going to die. sweetgirlsar I'm sorry friend I do not know very many food. when do the silly geese fly south phish* Slow down u fuck. Hime Sweat Home On my insurance fraud shit. I'm not supposed to like beatboxing videos but I do. TakeASongToCulinarySchool "Laura, Steve, and their son Urn." My new alias is Quinoa Reeves. HOLY GOD KellBelleTN: Best baby announcement ever. ?????? ivy_hollivana you might say your phone and discord are in discord with one another. kabeebus lit af af ?????? I found a little soundproofed practice room in the music school with a gorgeously-used traditional Yamaha baby grand. Lost ~5 hours. "mrjaydeeem only in Columbia, Missouri - the flagship of the academic journalist." mrjaydeeem: AsphaltApostle Consumer goods chic I'm fairly certain I just saw a young woman wearing a Canon-branded camera sling as a choker... Wow dude. Thanks for the heads up. Holy shit. I want to summon Gabe with my tattoo like Quinoa Reeves in that one movie. creaku thank you. creaku: AsphaltApostle nugpapi very tasteful. """Have any open positions you're hiring for?"" ""Actually yeah! I think we're shoa COAL MULE at the moment.""" AsphaltApostle ClickHole have an opening for me yet? coolknifeguy nugpapi good God in heaven. chrishoy: It's only when you see classic cars in real life that you realise just how much bigger modern cars have become. … comedone_extra prof loves his giantess videos! ColoursLaughing: Dominoes-branded ball & chain. DeadDigitizer: RotatingBacon death is a cure for death. "Me as a father: ""If you don't eat your peas right fuckin now I'm putting you up on Silkroad.""" Doughbeezy have you tried Silkroad? Doughbeezy: My daughter just climbed on topic me and went to sleep in literally 5 seconds.. She must know she bout to get sold! https:/… Deadass butt ass asleep. Tingly booty wake up. Luke at this photograaaaaaaaaaaefeeeeeee Daddy's Little Ghoul "SkinnySaan: KDthe1ne XXL ?????? ""Nas is the coolest DJ in the world?!"" " "gravillian: I'm reading KuVonnegut's ""Hocus Pocus"" and this exchange is incredible " tyrabanks: Twins MaraHruby: Today I'm filled with joy because it has been three years exactly since the day I met this… LienhardRacing: ?????? This is adorable. madisonwillis: i'm f*ked up on essential oils and i'm ready 2 party "mrjaydeeem politics are too moderate to be progressive, ais mediocre, and most of the journo culture is too mild to be powerful." ammnont_ebooks: today i went to mars and peed on it hahahahaahahaahahahahhahahaahahhahhahahhahhahahhahhahhahhahahahahaahahhhahahah Some kickbutt video screens. "We're watching SmaHouse. ""Pat, fist my ass.""" Not enough R.I.P. U.S.S. Wednesday. Cinco de ?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????$????????????????????????????????????????????????????????!???????????? Rapmonster: There's nothing I'm afraid of like scared people Bill Bennett is a crook. "Rapmonster: I warn you, if you bore me, I shall take my revenge." Why can't I scavenge human flesh? Stupid game. "N.W.A. ""Fuck the 1??????????????????8??????????????????????????1??????????????????9???????????????????????????8?????????????????????1??????" NOT ENOUGH MINDLESS GRINDING I NEED MORE Star Wars Episode VII: ??????????????????????????????????????$???????????????????????????%????????????????????????????^??????????????????? I don't Tweet enough. GhettoGeek Inside your colon. Pom moe OF COURSE I LOVE SPENDING MY LIFE GRINDING IN MMOS I have never scored in Huttball. Got a job at Harbor Freight. Swag. THOUGHTLESS LIFELESS Oh god I'm going to burn this fucking book. Good morning Twitter. """...we once believed that wealth and success for men were connected and were a product of diligence and virtue."" L. O. L. YOU STUPID FUCK" 2nd page of Bill Bennett's book and I'm already fuming. "If I surround myself in conservative literature, will I make it out alive?" syrupf "Johnny Tsunami 3: Separate, But Equal" Bluetooth it to my Bluetooth shrine. GLACIAL BOARDER COMMUNE Is there a division of the military that just involves shouting? I shall become Secretary General of it. Mount Munch kabeebus Home Lobotomy. Johnny Tsunami 6: Urchin Debris Wall officialjaden ayyyyyyyyy officialjaden: George orgamecha I do not want to go to the Suck House. "Turns out, the SmaHouse will not suck you off." syrupf I'm glad b/c Brent said you'd immediately block me. syrupf we just realized how much you look like small John. AmazonHelp problem's already solved! JOHNNY'S ON THE TELLY. AmazonHelp: AsphaltApostle Sorry your video isn't playing for you. What kind of device are you using to watch? Are there any error mes… syrupf hey Johnny. WALL OF DEBRIS LIT AF Amazon Johnny Tsunami's not working. Let me raise your children. It's Jonathan Tsunami time! syrupf: dr latency's sag repoWhat the fuck. BIG HONKER Computer fan howlin! spacejerkin: it's High noon somewhere in the world AKBDQN probably smart. Way too tired to ever kill though. AKBDQN: AsphaltApostle dave AKBDQN: AsphaltApostle AKBDQN that's brilliant - probably not enough to justify any fees though. WhoAreYouAnd "4WordMeaningOfLife intellectually transcend ""meaning of""" "AKBDQN damn... Yeah I haven't had access to cable television in years, not that it would be fully broadcast anyway lol" AKBDQN dear oh dear. I didn't know. I'll probably end up paying for 24hrs at least lol AKBDQN I haven't kept up with it but I will certainly be tuning into Le Mans this year. I think I already took off work lol AKBDQN I'M READY TO BE ENGULFED! AKBDQN: welcome back baby to the disco fire Sentreh always happy to help a ThirdEyeOpen! "Yes, this is how I choose to use my gifts. " Sentreh Sentreh did you just mistake me for Google? Sentreh I didn't expect you to pay to watch it anyway lol It's a Disney movie from the late 90s. This is where Brandon was forged. Sentreh "syrupf Johnny Tsunami says the word ""friendzoned"" within the first 30 seconds." Dick Cheney bookmarks... Disastrous organization. No folders-2300 on the bookmarks bar. 85% dead links. None shortened. "Did you know that if you type enough characters into a computer, you will eventually hack something." "Bare minimum for a hacker rig: custom integrated liquid-cooling system, 6 4K displays, 3 active ergonomic keyboards, 2 on standby." comedone_extra I've been constructing a proposal for Lucy for IMMEDIATE extraction through the Earth's crust to hell in events like this. kabeebus I wish I knew the sounds of Seth Green so I could enthusiastically inquire about their process and techniques. "Snuck into the school of music & played for 5 hours on Friday. Unfortunately, this mono recording's all i got. " KodakBlack1k: Remember Me Like John Linen WebMD: Comic Con Colon "Imagine an alternate reality where everything is exactly the same except the people who ""hacked your Facebook"" ACTUALLY hacked Facebook." PersonTheHumann thank you! Guess I need to go back and hack the drynet's default infrastructure again... Would anyone with a desktop mind trying the embedded audio player? Can't get it to function on iOS. What the fuck is the Aventador's successor called I can't remember. Dogknob1 my life is a prison. I have never worn a less comfortable button-down in my life. "jonnysun: tinder, but just for finding someone walking in the same direction as u to share a umbrela with when its raining" botandy: swipe down on tinder to send people straight to hell "Got yo girl in the Audi... Originally to do something naughty, but I'll actually just be ranting to her about torque steer for 2 hours." Ultra-precious mom & son. richchigga: Storage wars but they hav guns and its just ppl killing each other on tv "richchigga: me: happy mothers day mom mom: its leg day brother -HH" collision: The year is 2041. The search for monetizable space continues on schedule. "NASFACTS: call your mother today and tell her those three special words: ""I love nascar""" "I feel I've wanted a feature like collections for so long, I don't actually know how I wanted to utilize it anymore." "comedone_extra basically you staa ""publishing company"" and create or buy one template, allowing ""authors"" to use it for a cut." comedone_extra they're not usually programs but literally word documents with clunky scripts to auto-inseyour proper nouns. comedone_extra I can't believe I hadn't thought of that!!!! Oh shit. "comedone_extra more like post-gypsy shospikey-haired Grass Roots Organizing pseudoscientist who thinks she's infinitely ""cooky.""" "Regardless of its distastefulness, I just don't understand WHY. Like... Sell blow or something." "If you didn't already know, the only people who really make money on Createspace use pre-fabbed templates to manufacture shitty novels." Black Evo X with ditires & a brush guard... comedone_extra yeah it's definitely violent. I'm thinking a public elementary school counselor. Mrs. Teeth.... "Assuming I should only stick to one dental character surname per property, which do you prefer?" Teeth-scented air freshener. """Promise Keepers"" sounds like a kindergarten extracurricular." PromiseKeepers hmu if y'all are lacking millennial media consultation. OH MY GOD PhishersOfMen HackingForJesus Didn't even bother to kill the tweet. pissboot want me to link you some honking videos? Drakegoat: Sweet New Bath Bomb ?? Day One 2 (hehe) proving to be pretty/useful enough to become my primary original text-entry software. The Steve Jobs of literature. butt_things: butt awe MoonReplica this is more or less how I begin my book's sales pitch. comedone_extra no way dude. He'd just buy a new computer. I hacked Dick Cheney's computer and spent two weeks remotely clearing malware manually / deleted duplicate files and cleaning the desktop. Karma Goth "orgamecha I think what would define it as an iceberg, specifically, is a totally out-of-control pattern of movement. Big Cold Idiot." orgamecha I need to incorporate cyber icebergs into a film one day. Like Gigantic pseudosentient masses of ancient servers or something. "If the Titanic II actually starts sinking on her maiden voyage, do you think anyone will respond to her distress call?" """Suicide is the number one cause of death of men under 50"" is this a real number????" DrSunder1 hello! "mrjaydeeem of course! If I'm honest, I've already decided by the time I post such polls." FIXED! I feel like the last 10 polls I've done have ended up tied... This has got to be an issue for anyone still actually concerned with them. Perfect activities for father and son: sweating. "yeah. Depending on the dog, of course. I grew up with an ancient half-wolf, half husky who was definitely serene enough." "not quite western or contentious enough for Theodore, I'm afraid." """My dogs are lies."" ""Haha! Your dogs are little liars?"" ""No, they are the twin sentinels of falsehood, Libel and Slander.""" "Or maybe a pair! Libel & Slander Girl & Boy" "I think Pith may actually end up with a dog... A white husky named Slander." "If the expletive ""shucks"" originated from ""shucking"" corn, the contemporary equivalent would technically be ""chaff.""" comedone_extra Mike's Tropical Burst Kidney Stones "Honestly, vulgarity is seriously peaking right now. " "comedone_extra realized just a minute ago that this is basically the equivalent of sending a ""film"" made with iMovie presets to Sundance." Bluetooth. comedone_extra when will Mein Kamf be public domain? "comedone_extra and they'll probably sell way more than I ever will, yet friends + family are continuously bewildered by my hesitance lol." It's fuckin lit dude!!!!!! S L O W & L O W ivy_hollivana faux hoe foes "Our gourd is an awesome gourd, He rains" """Sick!"" ""Brilliant!""" WabiBeats let's go play cat and mouse with some Somalian pirates! "Ghandi-style ""wisdom"" paI: Respiration is required for basic function of the cardiovascular system." Disney Child Star Brandon Baker Sexually Assaulted By Rogue Maternal Sentience AKBDQN: Flying over Madagascar always leaves me in awe comedone_extra he was probably tryna fly away from them. "The beauty of volition is best manifest in aviation, which makes this particularly disappointing." "As a 22-year-old and former student pilot, I would hope my family would not take my accountability away like this. " kabeebus OH FUCK. syrupf I took like 30 times the recommended dose once and it was very strange. "syrupf: Some of the main side effects of antihistamines include: • Confusion" Eliminate rodents. Antihistamine boys idiot_joke_teen "LadyBleuLAX: just need 60 more followers...lol 666 MarkOfTheBeast sixsixsix" "Thrillridepics: If you gotta go... urbanlegend creepy SCARY markofthebeast horror Victorian …" MarkoftheBeast 0kbps: RoadandTrack: Road Test: 1964 Lotus Elan 1600 He LucaFluckiger: He is the bomb nugpapi This is my favorite one by far. heragu2002: scuderiagta LienhardRacing FAFBullDog california458 YouLikeCarsUK fokkerdude IVekkio OccupyLancia MAGIC???? … LienhardRacing: Abarth TC1000 ?? nutsicle good morning! LIVE on Periscope: Glow Up Click Clack loliliberator: pushing small children off bicycles in my DEAL WITH IT meme glasses shito establish my status as an adult in the labo… uploadspeed fuck. A monthly print magazine centered around vintage agricultural equipment but targeted toward 15-35 year olds. "AKBDQN: Selamat pagi, Malaysia Watch Instavideo: " truuuuuuu " how's married life, James?" : Having fun paying for dinner THRASHER LUST kenzinaughtonn especially ?? IT'S FWATHAN LUTH FOM BITH/??????????? 3RD PARTY KEYBOARD SUPPORT. When u discover a hot keeeey "The clicking and The clacking" __Xen0s__: sudafed intellectual "Well, Zenon Girl of the 21st Century is... A typical low-budget made-for-TV Disney film." Danger Major I can't believe I made Mom go in the Chill Chamber... HOLY FUCK. ihaveswineflu: Need to stahanging with ppl that will let me take their picture. Maybe that's too specific. I'd like to find some peo… "CARmagazine: How good is the new AlfaRomeo Giulia Quadrifoglio? Five stars, that's how good... …" rinpana: sure that's important but I was in the middle of someth ???????????? "Throw that ass in a rhombus (Damn) Throw that ass in the Pentagon (Ooo)" sippinongomez delete this. VeganRevoIution yeah. loliliberator: Only useful for another few hours. MarkoftheBoys clickbait_bot: Breathtaking. The Cute Cosplayer Hates Artist. TroyDB7: FCA dealer billed me $800 for tearing down my 5.7. To diagnose and its $9K to fix a 20 month old truck Motorama … CHINA FAST Royal displeasure. virgyvirgil lol. All Tom Cruise's muscle mass went to his hair holy shit!!! I'm gonna star in the new Top Gun. We're watching Jaws III: Revenge of Yoko Ono Then my aaaaaa go off __Xen0s__ FUCK THE RODENT. Perhaps one should knock out the power for the Huff Host. SmartCoffin: slowly rotting // rapidly updating """RIP?"" Really? Have we really reached the point of PITYING the VERMIN for knocking out infrastructure?? " "alanresnicks: I think it's time we got EthernetCables trending! Let's make it happen! " "ClickHole: Insane Speed-Reader Tears Through 2,500-Word Warranty Agreement In 4 Sec